Work Text:
As his thoughts came in waves, so too did his tears. Makoto Yuki was lying in bed in his room on a chilly September night, joined only by the pale moonlight fluttering through his window. He’s grown to dread this inevitable part of his day, as it provides nothing to keep the slowly-growing list of anxieties at bay.
Makoto does an excellent job of keeping a brave face, or at least he hopes so, but being the leader of a group that is constantly met with danger has surely taken its toll.
All it could take was one slip-up, one minor act of negligence, and one of his dearest friends would be gone. But even then, all of them will die eventually regardless, right? So what’s even the point, then?
And why, why did he allow himself to start feeling again, anyway? Five months ago, these sorts of things wouldn’t have even been a brief flicker in his mind. Losing your parents at the age of six teaches you to not keep things close. Why couldn’t he have retained that mindset?
His sobs were becoming audible now, but ironically Makoto didn’t find himself to care. If someone found him crying alone in his room, hopefully they’d be so freaked out they’d cut him off entirely.
That would be one less person to worry about.
***
Junpei couldn’t sleep. He’d been playing his new game up until the Dark Hour came, cutting his session short. He tried to get some rest afterwards, but excited thoughts of his new game made it impossible. He didn’t wanna give in and start playing the game again, so he settled for just going on a walk down the hall or something.
On his way back to his room, no closer to the lull of sleep than he was before, Junpei hears a peculiar sound. It’s faint, but sounds like it’s coming from Makoto’s room. He approaches Makoto’s door and presses his ear up against it. Yep, that’s definitely the sound of gentle weeping.
Without hesitation, Junpei creaks the door open and steps inside, causing the weeping to stop. “Dude?” he whispers. No response. Determined, Junpei shuts the door before tiptoeing over beside the bed and kneeling down. He tries again: “Hey man, what’s wrong?”
“Don’t wanna talk about it,” the figure facing away from him mumbles. That’s progress!
“Are you sure?” With his dumb grin and signature bravado, he continues, “Whatever it is, I’m certain The Great Junpei can sort it out.”
“Doubt it.”
Junpei repositions himself so that he’s sitting down casually. “Well, on the off chance that that’s true, you could at least talk to me about it.”
Makoto turns to face up towards the ceiling and hesitates, but replies, “I was thinking about mortality, especially about how that relates to us as SEES. And how, as the leader, I…” Makoto’s voice trailed off, but Junpei understood.
Not missing a beat, he replies, “Well, I’m sure as hell not going anywhere, and I can prove it too.” Makoto turns fully to look at the taller boy sitting next to his bed, and gazes at how Junpei’s dumb grin is in full force, shining through the darkness like the brightest star.
“How?” he replies.
Junpei swiftly gets up and vaults onto the other side of the bed next to Makoto. “Like this.” Makoto stares at him blankly for a moment, before erupting into a fit of giggles, with Junpei quickly following suit. After basking in the moment and giggling for a bit together, Makoto simply states, “You’re a dumbass.”
Getting under the covers, Junpei replies, “I’m your dumbass.” Makoto giggles one final time and snuggles up close to Junpei, his head situated comfortably on Junpei’s chest. Junpei wraps his arms around the smaller boy, and buries his face in Makoto’s cobalt hair.
Makoto looks up and admires the other boy. Something about the moonlight morphed his typically goofy and cute appearance into something far more mature and serene. It was comforting. It was warm. It made Makoto feel safe.
And it was responsible for the most peaceful night of sleep Makoto had in a long time.