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Button House was in great spirits.
After Sam and Claire’s wedding had gone viral the previous winter, they had had several winter weddings booked in the October, November and early December period, all requesting the same shabby chic, brilliantly lit service that Sam and Claire had enthusiastically praised over social media.
“Well as you all know, most of the money we got from these last few months has gone straight to the west wing–”
“Thank god,” Thomas moaned. His room was in the west wing, the better to see the sunrise, and it was in a terrible state; leaking and crumbling something awful.
“But we were also looking at something else…”
Mike was stood proudly in front of it, leaning against the king. He straightened up as Alison made her way outside, presumably followed by her entorage of ghostly pals, and almost toppled both him and the king over.
“Merry Christmas Robin,” Alison smiled, throwing her arms out towards it.
“Yeah, Merry Christmas mate!” Mike echoed, grinning broadly.
Robin whooped, off like a shot towards the giant board and its pieces. He ran all over it, darting through the towering pieces – and literally through some, like that was a game in itself – while Alison watched.
“Is big chess board!” Robin shouted, “big one!” He came to a skidding halt in the middle of the board and threw his arms up to yell, “It’s so big!” Then he was off again, slaloming between pieces and pointing out what was what.
“Does he like it?” Mike asked, looking bemusedly at the – to him – empty chess board his wife was grinning at.
“Loves it,” she told him reaching out for his hand. “Like letting a dog off the lead by a pond full of ducks.”
Mike snorted.
Fanny was peering at the board, her lip curled. “What is it made of?”
“Uh… plastic, I think?”
The Button matriarch sniffed. “I’d much rather it were made of marble.”
Alison rubbed her temples. “Fanny, a full marble chess set would cost thousands and thousands of pounds. Hell, it would probably cost the same as the house repairs, and you know damn well how much that’s cost us.”
Fanny’s cheeks pinked. “Fine. What about plain stone then, surely that would be less expensive?”
Alison sighed. “It would be, but it’d still be thousands. I’ll grant you; probably not as many thousands, but still very expensive. It’s not even about the cost, really though. Marble or stone would both be too heavy for a working chess set. Nobody would be able to move the pieces.”
“Nice decor, though,” Pat said approvingly. “A full fancy stone chess set? Reet posh, that.”
Alison shot him a look. Not helping.
“But– but yes, completely useless though, sorry Fanny.” Pat quickly added.
Fanny frowned, but ultimately shrugged, accepting it.
Thomas gaped at her. “So you’re just fine with this, then?”
“Yes?” Fanny said, turning to him curiously. “Why wouldn’t I be?”
“Because it’s not fair!” Thomas exclaimed. "How come Robin gets a present and we don’t?”
“Well, um, it’s not really a 'Robin' present, and you’re all welcome to use it–"
“Come off it Alison,” the poet scoffed, crossing his arms like a pouting child. “We all know that chess is Robin's thing.”
“And Julian’s,” Pat and Humphrey said at the same time.
The ghosts turned to the MP.
“Yeah, see? Not just for Robin then, is it?” Julian pointed out nervously. He let out a bit of an awkward laugh, adjusting his tie as he tipped his chin towards Alison. “I mean, getting a present just for one of us would be really shitty Alison,” he remarked.
Alison shot him a glare so cold that Julian actually blanched, stepping back behind Pat a little.
“Look. It's not actually present for Robin, okay?” Alison insisted. “After the Willoughby wedding last month we had a bit of spare cash to put towards an attraction for the guests.” The Willoughby's had been very generous indeed, not only paying the full amount for their wedding party and board but also leaving a sizable tip for Alison and Mike’s help.
The Captain frowned. “But you already did that.”
“The bounce-suits can't be the only thing we have, guys–"
“Not that,” the Captain interrupted, “that chess set you made for them.”
“Yes,” Thomas complained, “you made that because you said weren’t going to get him one, but you have! And for Christmas no less!”
Alison took a deep breath, resisting the urge to put her head in her hands. “I said I wasn't going to get one because we didn’t have the money, but like I said, with the tip the Willoughby's gave us we could afford one. A proper one.” Thomas and the Captain both opened their mouths to speak but Alison held up a hand, quickly continuing. “So yes, I know Robin really wanted it and we did get it, but we got it for the hotel. And the fact that it came for Christmas was just a coincidence, so we thought we’d make it into a bit of a Christmas surprise for him. You know, to do something nice.”
Thomas looked from her to the other ghosts, incredulous. “How is that different from a Christmas present?”
“I think it’s a wonderful idea,” Kitty said loudly. “I like that Alison has been able to get something for the guests that at least one of us will also like, like that new sound system for the wedding parties that you like so much, Thomas.”
Thomas went very red, his eyes dropping to the floor.
“Yes, it's exactly like that, Thomas,” Alisons said triumphantly.
The poet didn’t argue further, but the Captain straightened up with some offense, shaking his head. “I still think it's unfair,” He announced, chin jutted forward.
“But it is a good idea for the hotel,'' Pat added. “‘Specially if people bring kids. Good to get 'em involved in chess and such again.”
“Yes,” Humphrey piped up from in between Kitty’s hands. “It’s a dying art, if you’ll pardon the pun. Julian was the first person I’ve seen play with it since Fanny died. I’d like to see some kids learning to play, and I bet they will if it's outdoors an’ all big like that is. More fun, innit?”
“Exactly!” Pat beamed at him.
“I agree,” Kitty said. “I think the guests will like it very much.”
“I suppose it's acceptable then, for the hotel,” the Captain nodded, looking from the chess board to Alison shrewdly. “Agreed. And speaking of things for the hotel, I think that the entryway would benefit from a nice display of weaponry. I know there's a cache somewhere in the house–"
"Captain, no. I've already told you, I am not putting rifles and grenades in the entryway – inactive or not."
"But it's not for me, it's for the hotel.”
Alison put her hands on her hips. “Yeah, that's absolutely not how it's gonna work.”
The Captain huffed, hurring to keep pace with the young owner as she scurried back to the house, insistently making his case. Thomas joined alongside, hoping for some poetry books to be added to the library - for the guests, of course.
Robin came speeding up and grabbed Julian by the hand, dragging him over to the giant game. “Look, come look! Is big chess board!”
“Yes, I see that,” Julian said, huffing, but when Robin turned away to tug him over the lawn he let the smile he’d been holding back escape onto his face.
“Rook to E5.”
Julian took six long strides across the board, landing on a black square.
Robin rubbed his hands together gleefully; Julian had fallen into his trap.
He was overjoyed that Alison and Mike had bought him this. It really was a wonderful present, exactly what he’d wanted. And a proper surprise, too; he hadn’t seen it coming at all.
He'd known that Alison and Mike had been looking for another attraction for the hotel after the wedding payment had come through, but they'd been looking at other things, not the chess set. Robin had made his case the second he'd caught wind of their discussions, hoping for Alison to get one now that they had the money, only to be refused by Alison again.
Had she been planning it all this time? She could have lied to him, but Mike had said the same thing when he’d asked him for it instead (using the lights and morse code system they’d come up with) and gotten the same response. And Mike was a really terrible liar. It was strange, but Robin wasn’t one to look a gift bear in the mouth - or any bear, for that matter.
“E3 Prawn, move dooka-” He hopped forward one space, “to E4. Go dooka again,” he hopped one further space, this time, “land on E5, take castle-man.”
“Shit.”
“Checkmate!” Robin whooped, dancing on his space and punching the air while Julian huffed and swore.
“For fucks sake!” The MP stomped his foot on the giant board, groaning. “Fine, fine, re-set!”
They played four games before Robin finally let Julian off the hook.
Earlier, the ghosts had agreed to play a few games of charades before Mike’s family arrived for christmas dinner and Julian loved charades. Instead, Robin played another game by himself, having a great time running from one side of the board to the other to announce his moves. It was a difficult game, much more difficult than playing against Julian.
But eventually he got tired of playing with himself. Sometimes it got too difficult, and he worked himself into a corner often. The games were longer, but they dragged when he got stuck, or got to thinking so many steps ahead that he confused himself. That was the problem with playing with yourself; it was fun to pretend otherwise, but you always knew what your opponent was thinking, and he got so stuck in trying to counter his own hypothetical counter that he never actually played any moves.
He was just too good.
So he went back over to the house. He hoped that while the livings were having dinner, Julian would come back outside with him and play another couple of games. It was better when he had someone else to play against, and of course there was no getter chess partner than Julian.
Instead of going back inside properly, he shoved his head straight through the window of the common room. The ghosts were all congregated by the fire, awaiting the arrival of Mike's family – all except Julian. Robin looked around but he couldn’t see the pantsless Tory anywhere.
Robin grinned. Mike was putting the finishing touches to the dinner in the kitchen so he headed there. Technically, neither he nor Julian were meant to mess with anybody while they were working with fire and hot things, but it was Christmas!
As he approached the kitchen he heard voices.
“I said I was sorry!” That was Julian. Found him, then.
“You still didn’t have to say that,” Alison hissed. Alison. She was telling Julian off. Robin rolled his eyes as he got to the kitchen door. What was new. He was about to phase through when she spoke again. “'Oh it’d be really shitty if you got a present just for one of us’," she mocked in a high voice - that's what Julian had said about the chess set earlier.
It made Robin stop. Leaning closer to the door, he listened.
Alison sounded genuinely pissed off as she spat, "Well that's exactly what I did, didn’t I?”
“Again, I said I was sorry!” He heard Julian apologise. “But I had to throw them off the scent, right? And it worked! I told you you'd be able to swing it.”
"I almost didn't!" Alison snapped back. "I'm lucky Pat and Kitty helped me out – more than you did.”
“I tried!”
“No you didn’t!”
“Look, don’t feel bad. It can be used for the hotel, you know.”
“I know.”
“So technically you didn’t lie. Neither of us did.”
“Oh shut up Julian.” A heavy sigh from Alison. "Whatever. At least Robin liked it."
"Told you he would."
“I already knew he would! You’re the one who so desperately wanted him to have it.”
Julian had?
Ever since the trouserless MP had sat down at the little chess table and taught him how to play, Robin had been vaguely aware that they were playing their own, private game.
It was a simultaneously complex and simple game, full of advances and retreats. They were circling each other, almost, drawing closer suddenly before going back, like a dance. Sometimes Robin went too strong or too far and Julian retreated, panicked. Sometimes Julian made moves that Robin didn't understand, and sometimes Julian misinterpreted Robin’s own, oblivious. But they always made up for it, closing the gap again and again and again, and seeming even closer for it.
They had been playing for almost thirty years now, and while some people might have gotten bored, Robin and Julian had only seemed to enjoy it more and more. It might be slow, but it was certainly never boring.
Robin had thought many times about making a bigger move, but he was afraid. He’d never quite known what the endgame was, if there even was one. And since he didn't know how to win, he was afraid that any move too bold would end up with him losing instead, and he didn't think he could afford that. The game was too fun, too special, and he was terrified of ruining it.
But this new move of Julian’s had changed the whole board. He’d intended it to be secret, but instead it had finally been the clear move Robin had been waiting for, even if he hadn't quite realised it. Robin finally knew what game they were playing.
As he heard Alison’s footsteps approach, Robin smiled to himself and stepped back into the wall beside the kitchen, disappearing.
He was going to checkmate that bastard.
Julian yawned. Mike's family had turned up a couple of minutes ago. Luckily, with more of the rooms ready in the house his room didn’t have to be used for them, so he could take a nap in peace while they ate dinner.
But when he stepped through his closed door, Robin was waiting for him.
“Um. Hey?” He said, surprised to see the caveman waiting for him.
“Hey. Come for nap?”
Julian chuckled, crossing over to the bed and stretching his arms above his head, making the joints click. “Yeah, thought I’d slip one in while dinner’s on. Want to join?” He offered. “I bet you’ve tuckered yourself right out playing all afternoon.”
Robin grinned. “Me had lots of fun.”
“Like it, then?”
“Is great Christmas present.”
Julian looked pleased. “Good,” he said, “I’m glad.”
“Is funny though,” Robin said. “Alison said she not getting big chess board or hotel, she and Mike wanted inside cin-mena, or game room. Mike want Packing Man. Is… intesting that they get chess board instead.”
“It’s Pac-Man,” Julian corrected absently, pulling at his collar. “Uh, guess they changed their minds. Those things are a lot of work, not just money. And anyway, have you considered they told you that because they wanted to surprise you? People lie, you know.”
Robin rolled his eyes. “Alison terrible liar.”
Julian scowled at him. “Hey,” he protested, “I’m teaching her.”
“I say what I say,” Robin said, crossing his arms. “And Mike even worse.”
Julian sighed, running a hand sharply through his hair. “Well maybe they-”
“You got me chess board,” Robin interrupted, staring Julian down.
The MP froze. "What?” He said, voice higher than usual. “No, I didn't have anything to do with that."
"Yes you did. Me know you did – heard you and Alison talking. Is from you; you got me Christmas present."
Julian looked caught for a moment, his eyes wide, but he quickly shifted track.
"Well, technically, I got us a present. I mean, me, I got me a present. You're not the only one that plays chess you know."
"But… we already have little chessboard. I wanted big one, not you, but you convince Alison to get it for me."
"Well, I mean… you wanted it,” the MP said lamely, unable to look the caveman in the eye.
Robin smiled. “I did,” he said quietly. “Is good Christmas present,” he told Julian. “Is nice of you; you hate Christmas.”
“That's not true,” Julian protested. “I love Christmas. Champagne everywhere, mistletoe, office Christmas parties full of short skirts and tight shirts. And you can't forget a good mince pie.”
Robin narrowed his eyes. “You said, first Christmas with Alison, you 'not big fan' of Christmas.”
Julian blinked, not expecting to have his own words thrown back at him, but he recovered quickly. “See? That's hardly hating Christmas is it?”
“Not loving either,” Robin pointed out and Julian frowned, crossing his arms.
“Well you can talk, Mr 'it's just a fad',” he told Robin irately.
Robin shrugged. “Don't mean I don't like it,” he said. “Can be boring and stupid, but can be nice if done right. Alison do it right, big party and dancing and presents – like big chess.” He grinned and Julian groaned, caught.
How had Robin twisted the conversation back to that?
“Well, it's– you see, I was–"
“You got me Christmas present,” Robin stated, cutting through Julian’s rambling.
Julian sighed. Damn. He’d been caught. The problem with Robin was that they were so bloody similar… he just couldn’t lie to him. Not because he wasn't any good at it, of course he was bloody good at it, you didn't get to be where he’d been in life without being a spectacular liar. But it didn’t work on Robin because he knew Julian so well. He always knew when Julian was lying.
“Fine,” Julian admitted. “I got you a Christmas present.”
Robin just grinned even wider.
“And I think thats quite impressive of me actually,” Julian said, puffing his chest out. Now he’d been found out he was going to claim as much credit as he could. “I mean, I am dead. It's not like I have money, or means of purchasing it myself.”
Well… that wasn't strictly true. In actual fact, he hadn’t so much as managed to 'convince Alison to buy it', as he had 'been caught by her trying to buy it himself using her credit cards' a few weeks ago. He'd been two numbers away from being able to press 'buy' when she walked in on him, and boy oh boy had she let him have it.
She’d shouted at him more than he’d ever been shouted at by her before, including that time they’d tried to fucking sing for her as an apology, and threatened to ban him from all technology. He wasn't allowed to just buy stuff apparently, which he thought was unfair. He told her that he wasn't even getting it for him, he was getting it as a Christmas present for Robin and then she’d gone all quiet and narrow-eyed, but given in and bought it, as long as he promised not to use her cards to try and buy anything again.
That was fine. He’d just use Mike’s cards instead. And anyway, it was more than worth almost losing every kind of technology privilege he had and being banished to the ruined guest house because it had worked and now Robin was looking at him like that, all crooked, beaming grin and big bright storm-blue eyes.
“You got me Christmas present.” Robin repeated.
Julian shuffled on his feet, rapidly smoothing down his clothes and looking anywhere but Robin. “Yeah, well, you know. I– well you’re, you know, we–”
Tired of Julian’s spluttering Robin rolled his eyes and reached for Julian’s tie, grasping it in one fist and tugging him down, down, down until he was close enough that Robin could kiss him.
Julian almost fell over, yanked off balance by Robin, but managed to fling his arms around Robin’s fur-covered shoulders and use the caveman to steady himself. Robin was only happy to help, winding his free arm around Julian's waist and holding him firmly in place. Julian made a pleased sound, thrilled to be touched, and moved one of his hands from Robin’s shoulders down to his arm, squeezing the thick, warm muscle there. Robin chuckled against Julian’s lips, a throaty sound that made Julian shiver and press even closer.
“You got me Christmas present.” Robin said softly when he pulled back.
“Mmhm,” Julian nodded wildly, “I’m brilliant, I know, whatever; come back here.”
He leaned down again but Robin stepped back, out of kissing range and only grinned up at him.
“You like me.”
Julian eyes went wide. He stepped back, but Robin kept a firm grip on his tie. He was trapped, Robin looking at him expectantly – but also knowingly.
He couldn’t lie to Robin.
Julian swallowed the instinct to tell Robin no, he didn’t like him, the chess set was just him being nice, it didn’t mean anything. Instead he said, “…fine. Yes. I like you. Have uh, have for a while now, if I’m being honest.” His nose wrinkled. “I hate being honest,” he muttered. “But you ah, you don’t have to–"
“Me like you too, idiot.” Robin interrupted. His eyes were bright, but they weren’t quite looking at him. “Have for while now,” he echoed.
“Oh.” Julian said. “Well… that's uh, that's good isn’t it.”
“Yup.” Robin smiled at him. God he was such a smug bastard. Julian wanted to kiss the smug look right off his face.
So he did.
Of course, Robin was already pulling him back down by the tie, so it was difficult to say which of them started it – but neither of them finished it for a long, long while.