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Not even close. Short by 1.7 billion GAC and only Lance’s performance remained.
Keith knew the team was backstage panicking, scrambling to somehow make up the difference.
Voltron had tons of support. But the support they needed to win the war, ammunitions, funds, soldiers, were largely absent.
1.7 billion GAC was all that stood between the rebellion and certain doom. Raise 3 billion GAC and the Tri-Galactic Alliance, made up of three most powerful solar systems in the local galactic cluster, would join the Voltron Coalition with their full support. Once they joined, all the neighboring systems would surely follow suit.
But so far, after a full day of performances, they had only managed to raise 1.3, less than half of what they needed.
Keith wished he was there with them. He knew it wouldn’t have made a difference financially, but then they would all be able to face their defeat together as a team.
As a team.
Who was he kidding? He is not a part of Voltron anymore. He left because he was no longer needed. He was never meant to lead the team.
That’s why he’s here, alone. On one of the Blade of Marmora’s numerous hidden bases, across the universe, training in his empty room with nothing but space cable to keep him company.
Finding Shiro was the greatest moment of his life, but the following months were sour.
Struggling to find his balance as a leader with Shiro back in the fold, Keith couldn't blame him. Shiro came back and did what he did best. And he did it a hell of a lot better than Keith. Much better.
But Keith couldn’t lie. He had gotten used to being the head of Voltron. And now, he missed it.
He missed everyone. Shiro, Allura, Pidge and Hunk. Even Coran.
But surprisingly, he missed Lance most of all. He would never admit that though.
The two of them had grown close during Shiro’s absence. He missed his right hand man.
There was another reason he had to leave, because in that time, Keith realized he had deep, unyielding feelings for Lance. Feelings that started out small as a crush in flight school then grew exponentially in space.
Lance would never return those feelings.
Not only was Keith’s membership no longer a necessary part of the team, which hurt enough, what hurt even more was watching Lance endlessly pine and flirt with Allura who was clearly not into it.
As much as he wanted to say: “I’m right here. I want to be the one to return your affections. Allura doesn’t like you, but I do.” He couldn’t bring himself to do so. He wouldn’t even know how.
At the very best, Lance only saw Keith as a co-worker. He had accepted Keith as team leader and no longer enemies but that was the extent of it. Still rivals, no denying that. Their silly competitions and pointless arguments made them better teammates and fighters.
He missed their stupid little arguments.
“Now introducing Lance, the paladin of the Red Lion of Voltron!”
Keith snapped out of his thoughts, put down his sword and sat down cross legged in front of the screen.
Lance walks on to the stage, smiling and waving, and in his other hand is his guitar. The same guitar Keith pointed out to Lance on one of their trips to the Space Mall.
“Hey everyone.” He says into the mic. The crowd screamed. Keith rolled his eyes but couldn’t help but agree with their enthusiasm. “It’s good to see you guys too.” Lance smiled brightly and tuned his guitar.
“I’ve got a little change of plans for y’all, if you want to listen up.” He continues.
“Now, I know you guys came here to see me dance, and I can still dance if you think this will be terrible,” Lance laughs off his self-deprecating joke and the audience laughs with him.
Keith still wanted to see Lance dance. He was always bragging about “having the moves” but Keith had yet to see him break them out.
Keith glanced at the counter in the bottom right hand corner of the screen. 2 billion GAC already? Lance hadn’t even started! Keith had no clue Lance was this popular, it now made sense why he was last.
“You see, I got my heart broken a little while ago. And as much as I love to dance, I need to get this feeling off my chest before it eats me alive, so I wrote a little song. That okay with y’all?” Lance asked and the crowd screamed again in response.
Keith groaned. Of course he would write some sappy love song about his unrequited love for Allura. He almost wanted to turn it off, but he felt that would be a betrayal to the team as whole and decided he could muscle through a short song.
“So this is ‘Loneliest,’ I hope y’all like it.”
The first few notes play, Lance gives his guitar a strum and starts singing:
You'll be the saddest part of me
A part of me that will never be mine
It's obvious
Tonight is gonna be the loneliest
Suddenly, Lance transformed. One moment he was a smiling cocky paladin, now he was a sad, solemn teen from Earth singing his heart out.
You're still the oxygen I breathe
I see your face when I close my eyes
It's torturous
Tonight is gonna be the loneliest
Lance’s gravelly voice hit Keith where it hurt. These lyrics definitely reflected what was in his own heart, and for a moment he forgot Lance was singing to someone else.
There's a few lines that I have wrote
In case of death, that's what I want, that's what I want
So don't be sad when I'll be gone
There's just one thing I hope you know, I loved you so
Once again, he was brought back to reality where they could all die any moment. Keith remembered all the tough scrapes he and Lance had gotten out of together.
Once, Lance was so badly hurt, bleeding out and losing consciousness, he confided in Keith that he had a box of letters under his bed he had written to his family back on Earth. He knew they were useless. If he died, they would never make it home. If he lived, he could see them again and share his feelings in person.
Then he made Keith promise to give the letters to his family. Keith refused, “Don’t talk like that, you’re making it out of here.” Pidge showed up soon after and Keith let out a breath of relief. He was not going to let Lance die.
'Cause I don't even care about the time I've got left here
The only thing I know now is that I wanna spend it
With you, with you nobody else here
Tonight is gonna be the loneliest
He wondered if Lance kept his songs in that very same box. Did he have a notebook? Was Lance the type of person to keep a journal?
The music picked up and Keith could hear Lance’s heart break as his voice went raw.
You'll be the saddest part of me
A part of me that will never be mine
It's obvious
Tonight is gonna be the loneliest
Keith took another look at the counter and smiled. Their goal had been reached!
You're still the oxygen I breathe
I see your face when I close my eyes
It's torturous
Tonight is gonna be the loneliest
Keith’s smile was momentary. The goal was reached and the numbers kept climbing but he regretted that he couldn’t share his happiness with the rest of Team Voltron.
I'm sorry but I gotta go
That’s what he said to me, as he let me go, he left me alone
Keith’s heart stopped. “He”
“I’m sorry, but I gotta go.” It was the last thing Keith said to Lance before he hopped in a pod to join the Blades.
Keith remembered Lance waiting outside his pod when he came into the hanger with his duffel bag, ready to leave. He remembered Lance’s dejected look in the rearview. He never thought much of it. Convinced himself that Lance just didn’t want his teammate to leave.
Maybe he was wrong.
And I just keep on thinking how you made me feel better
And all the crazy little things that we did together
In the end, in the end, it doesn't matter
If tonight is gonna be the loneliest
Suddenly it hit him. How Lance always insisted on being around him. Keith thought it was just because he wanted to be an annoyance and get a rise out of Keith. He never refused his company too profusely, in an effort to keep up appearances, making Lance believe he didn’t actually have feelings for him but still keep him close enough to sate Keith’s own desire to be near the Red Paladin.
Maybe Lance wanted to be near Keith too.
You'll be the saddest part of me
A part of me that will never be mine
It's obvious
Tonight is gonna be the loneliest
Keith didn’t even realize he was crying until his vision blurred. The hand that was over his mouth was dotted with tears.
He left. He left Lance all alone, letting him think he wanted nothing to do with him.
You're still the oxygen I breathe
I see your face when I close my eyes
It's torturous
Tonight is gonna be the loneliest
Shiro always made fun of Keith for being a clueless idiot. Especially after confessing his feelings.
Shiro just laughed and told Keith that he had known after their first week in space together.
By that time, Keith had figured it was too late. He had already joined the Blades but needed to get his feelings off his chest. He griped about Lance’s attraction to the Princess and Shiro let him speak. He never said anything about those two and at the time, Keith assumed it was because they were getting closer and Shiro didn’t want to break Keith’s already fragile heart.
Nope, it was because that bastard knew the entire time! Shiro just wanted them to work it out themselves. Which, Keith will admit is probably the best way to do it but he can’t help but feel irked with Shiro.
You'll be the saddest part of me
A part of me that will never be mine
It's obvious
Tonight is gonna be the loneliest
Lance continued to sing and Keith fell further down his rabbit hole of memories.
The best morning of his life: it was the night after he and Lance spent hours sparring. They decided to take a break and simulate Earth’s constellations in the training room. They stared up at the false stars, shoulder to shoulder, making it a competition, who could name the most constellations, stars and galaxies.
Keith didn’t realize they fell asleep until Pidge woke them up. The two of them were tangled up together and his heart stopped when Lance slowly opened his eyes with a smile.
Lance’s pretty smiling face turned to panic and he pushed Keith away.
Keith spent the rest of the day avoiding Lance and sulking.
That was the moment Keith realized that they would never be anything more than what they were. That the only connection they shared was being caught up in a messed up series of coincidences.
You'll be the saddest part of me
A part of me that will never be mine
It's obvious
Tonight is gonna be the loneliest
But if this song was about Keith, why did Lance push him away that morning? Why did he constantly continue to flirt with Allura? Maybe this was all just wishful thinking. Maybe it was about some other lucky alien boy? Did Lance even say “he” or was Keith just employing the deep shade of wishful thinking?
You're still the oxygen I breathe
I see your face when I close my eyes
It's torturous
Tonight is gonna be the loneliest
Lance finishes off the song sadly and slowly. For a moment the crowd is silent, obviously feeling Lance’s pain. The next, they are erupting into cheers. Lance gives a parting wave and walks off the stage.
“Thank you Lance!” The announcer shouts. “And a huge thanks to all of you! We’ve nearly doubled our goal! Voltron thanks you all for your support! And remember, help us take back the Universe by fighting along Voltron! Sign up today by contacting the frequency on your screen now! Have a great night!”
The speaker disappeared and the frequency code remained on a black screen until Keith switched it off and picked up his communicator.
He had to call Shiro.
“Hey Keith! What’s up? Did you catch the show?” Keith could hear Shiro’s smile. They all must be so excited about the final results. But Keith had no time for that right now.
“Yeah, yeah it was great, now about Lance’s song-”
Shiro laughed.
“Don’t laugh at me!” Keith protested.
“Okay, yeah,” Shiro toned down his laughter but his tone was still playful. “What about it?”
“Uhm… Would you - Did Lance say- Who is his song about?”
“Keith,” Shiro started softly, “I think you know exactly who that song is about.”
“So Lance told you who he wrote it for?”
“I didn’t even know he was singing. None of us did except Coran, I think.”
“How do you know who it’s for then? If he didn't tell you?”
Shiro sighed. “No one had to tell me anything. It’s pretty obvious. Out of all of us, Lance has been the most upset with your absence.”
“Are you sure it’s ‘cause he doesn’t have anyone to make fun of now?”
“I mean, I’m sure that's part of it. But you need to speak with him yourself. Just ask.”
“And what if- and major emphasis on the if there- if he is talking about me, then I’m the one who broke his heart! I can’t face him knowing that.”
“And now you have the opportunity to rectify that mistake. So get your ass off my frequency and on to Lance’s.”
“Can you just ask him about the song? See if he’ll tell you who it’s about?”
“Pfft, absolutely not.”
With that, Shiro closed the line with clear hopes that Keith would follow his instructions.
Keith however, has never been good at following instructions. Shiro evidently remembers that fact because a moment later he receives a text from him saying: “Lance left his communicator backstage, but isn’t ringing. Hmmmm, I wonder who is gonna call him after I give it back...”
Keith replies: “Fuck off, but this time deeper into space.”
“Not until your communicator is communicating with someone else.”
Keith sighs. Normally, Shiro is content with letting him stew in his feelings until he figures it out on his own, but this time Keith had a feeling he wasn’t going to back down.
And he was right.
Shiro texted again. “You know, I’m sure Lance needs someone to talk to after he spilled his guts on the stage. If only the one person he wanted to talk to reached out…”
Keith groaned in protest and dialed Lance.
“Well hello, hello! Haven’t heard from our deserter in awhile!” Lance greeted him. His voice sounded unsteady.
“Ha ha. I didn’t desert.” Keith grunted. But didn’t he desert them? Isn’t that the whole root of Lance’s heart break? Who was he to just brush that off?
“Alright, whatever,” Lance laughed, though Keith could tell it wasn’t genuine. “What’s up?”
“I uh, I caught the show.”
“Oh. You did?” Lance asked, clearly surprised.
“Yeah, I did. You guys were really good.”
“Thanks, I’ll let everyone know.”
“Cool, yeah just uh, let them know I said hi.”
They both paused, unsure where to go from there.
“Was there anything else? If you wanted to say hi to everyone, you know the Castle frequency is still the same. I know Kolivan told you not to use it except for Coalition meetings but I don’t think anyone over here would mind.”
“Yeah actually, there was something else.”
“Yeah? Go ahead!”
“Uh, well, first of all, congratulations. To everyone but especially you. You saved the whole event.”
“Aw, Keith! That’s not true. Everyone else had great sets!”
“I mean it though! You doubled what we already had and then some! Without you, the fundraiser would’ve failed. I really liked your song too. It probably wasn’t easy getting up there to do that.” Keith paused. Was he really gonna do this?
“Thank you! It wasn’t. I felt like I was gonna hurl the whole time!” Lance laughed and Keith melted. It had been so long since Keith heard his laugh. He couldn’t believe he almost forgot what it sounded like.
“Keith? You alive over there?”
Keith didn’t realize he had gone silent for so long.
“Yeah, sorry, I’m here.”
“Okay good, well, I’m glad you liked the show. And my song.”
“Can I ask you something?”
“Sure!”
Keith took a deep breath and blurted out: “Who is the song about?”
Lance went silent.
“Lance?” It was Keith’s turn to make sure he was alive still. “You… there?”
“Hi, I am.”
“You don’t have to answer if you don’t… want to.”
“No! No, it’s okay. It’s uh, no one you would know. Just some one.”
“Oh. Well, they must be a special someone. I’m sorry they broke your heart. You deserve better. Someone who can return what you feel.”
Lance paused again, then in almost a whisper: “Thank you Keith, that means a lot.”
“Yeah, of course.”
“I uh, have to go. Catch you later.”
“Yeah, goo-”
But Lance had hung up before Keith could finish his parting words.
Keith lowered his communicator from his ear and stared at the blank screen.
Then if almost through Keith’s stubborn will, the screen lit up again and it was-
“Lance?”
“I lied.”
“It’s okay, you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to,” Keith stammered, “I know it’s a private matter and you don’t-”
“Shut up mullet.” and the Mullet shut up. “Sorry. Anyways, about the song. I mean, who it’s about. You actually do know them pretty well.”
“I do?” Keith’s heart fluttered with optimistic anticipation. “How do I know them?”
“Is there a reason you called?”
“Yeah, just to say congrats of course. Why?”
“No, I think you called because you know exactly who my song is about.”
Keith grinned. “Do I now?”
“I can practically hear your shit eating grin.”
“I know nothing of the sort. So who is the song about?”
“Like I said, I think you know.”
“Well, maybe I just want to hear it from you.”
“You’re really gonna make me do this?”
“Maybe. Only if you want to though.”
“Okay well, I would just like to preface this with the fact that I’m totally over it now and I only played that song for the team. To help the universe. Not because of any current feelings I have right now or whatever.“ Lance took a deep breath “But, if it’s okay with you then… maybe the song is about you?”
“I love you, Lance.”
“Oh, well that’s okay, I mean, like I said I don’t- Wait, huh?”
“Lance.”
“Keith?”
“I love you.”
“I love you too.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Sorry for what?”
“For leaving. For leaving you. I shouldn’t have. I’m sorry.”
“Keith, no. Don’t apologize. You did what you had to. It took me a while to realize but you did what you thought was right. You had a chance to help elsewhere. A chance to learn about your heritage. And I shouldn’t have been selfish, asking you to stay, ambushing you that day outside your pod.”
“I was wrong.” Keith conceded.
“What do you mean?”
“I miss you guys. Everyone. I haven't learned anything about my past. I don’t feel like I’m part of a team anymore. I mean, I am but it’s different. Voltron is more than a team, it's…”
“A family.”
“Exactly.” Keith sighed.
“You can always come back?” Lance said hopefully.
“I would like nothing more than to do exactly that.”
“But you can’t.” Lance says, defeated.
“I can’t. I’ve committed to the Blades’ mission.”
“I understand…”
“I want to be with you Lance, more than anything, I swear.”
“I know. I know you do because I do too.”
“If we both make it out of this-”
“When.” Lance insisted
Keith smiled at Lance’s optimism. “Right, when. When we get out of this and end the war and back to Earth, we can be together.”
“God, that’s the dream.”
“Out of curiosity, how long have I been included in that dream?”
“You mean, how long since I’ve known I had it bad for you?”
“Yeah,” Keith laughed lightly.
“Ironically? Ever since you left.”
“What about Allura?”
”What do you mean, ‘What about Allura?’”
“Well, I didn’t think you were even remotely interested in me. I thought you had a thing for Allura. You’re always flirting with her.”
“I was. And I did. And then I didn’t. Allura is great and all but I think I finally realized that we’re just good friends. What about you? When did you know you liked me?”
“Oh yikes, this is embarrassing.”
“Oh come on, what can be more embarrassing than me singing a song about you live on TV in front of the literal entire universe?”
“Fair enough. Uhm. I’ve had a crush on you since year 3 of flight school.”
“What? You said you didn’t remember me!”
“Yeah, that might’ve been a tiny fib.”
“Wow. I can’t believe you. I can’t believe us.”
They both burst out laughing.
“So, where do we go from here?” Lance asked.
“Best guess? We just keep going until we see each other again. I don’t know when that’ll be but I know it can’t come soon enough.”
“Seconded.”
There was a knock on Lance’s door.
“Hey Lance?” It was Pidge. “I know you’re probably not doing too hot but, Allura called a team meeting.”
“I’ll be out in a moment, Pidge.” Lance called. He then turned to Keith and said, “I’m sorry, but I got to go.”
“No worries, I’m glad we finally came to our senses. Can’t wait to see you again.”
“Me too.” Then Lance blew a kiss to Keith and hung up.
Even though Lance could no longer see him, Keith held out his hand to “grab” the kiss, held it close to his chest and flopped backwards onto the floor.
Lance walked out of his room, all smiles to see a very confused Pidge.
“Hey, what’s going on? Last I saw you, you were-”
“I’m okay now. I uhm… I spoke to Keith.”
Pidge smirked. “Oh, did you now? And it went well judging by the fat ass grin on your face.”
“Shut up, Pidge.”