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Zhao Yunlan was not what anyone would call a man of great patience. He had a tendency to rush into things, to get short tempered with witnesses if they were being specifically obtuse, he even got annoyed with Guo Changcheng on a regular basis. Among many virtues he absolutely embodied, patience was not one of them.
And yet, Zhao Yunlan was waiting.
Upon hearing such statement, Zhu Hong would probably gasp in disbelief.
Chu Shuzhi would scoff.
Xiao Guo would ask what for.
And Zhao Yunlan would not tell them.
Not because he didn’t trust them, didn’t think them worthy or didn't consider their bonds important enough, no.
It was because Zhao Yunlan himself didn’t know.
He was waiting for someone, was all that he knew.
*
“A deal,” the Judiciar told him, showing him a contract signed in Zhao Yunlan’s own hand. For a chance to meet that one person again and live a happy life with them, Zhao Yunlan would work as an Underworld detective, chasing malevolent spirits for five hundred years. It didn’t sound that bad, truly - it was that kind of an afterlife that he would decidedly like, yet Yunlan had no memory of ever signing this contract.
“A deal?” he repeated, dazed and confused, clutching at the document, searching for any additional information. There was none. ”Why is there nothing here about who I am doing it for?”
The Judiciar’s looked at him with something that he probably thought was a sympathetic gaze.
“We cannot give the living the opportunity to live forever as underworld agents, I am sure Chief Zhao understands that,” the man replied, his voice laced with poorly imitated understanding." We need to make sure you won't turn rogue and try to prolong the contract endlessly to remain together... Your memory was a small price to pay, is what you both had said-“
“-both?” Zhao Yunlan interrupted, looking around them eagerly. Yet aside from him and the Judiciar, the chamber was empty – the dark stone floor, wooden walls lit by a few very ancient looking torches, Zhao Yunlan could see it all, just not the person he had supposedly given up, for a mere chance to be with them in the next life.
He must have loved them, Zhao Yunlan realized. He must have loved them enough to believe the promise of a life together was worth the gamble.
“Yes, the other person had to leave early,” the Judiciar said quickly. He was definitely hiding something, Yunlan decided.
“And they agreed to this deal?” Zhao Yunlan was lost on that part – how had he found anyone to love that strongly was a mystery, a miracle that he had not believed was possible when he was alive.
Now he didn’t even have the recollection of it.
“They did. Their memory was also taken.” That was a bit too much to take in. For a moment, he felt a bit faint, his eyes stuck to the messy characters he had supposedly written with his own hand. Someone… Someone had loved him. They made this bet together, they wanted… Someone had thought Zhao Yunlan was worth the risk. And he couldn’t even remember their name. Couldn’t recall their face. It sounded like a cruel deal, so how desperate, how in love they must have been? What had separated them, that they were ready to accept these extreme measures?
There was a chance they would never meet again, both of them unaware of who they were waiting for.
How could they have been so stupid?
And yet…
Zhao Yunlan looked down at the contract in his hand again.
He had never been stupid in life. Why would that change in death? He must have believed in something… or in someone.
When he looked up at the Judiciar, the man was watching him with grim satisfaction. As if he was waiting for him to give up and go back on the deal, as if he had his own private bet going on, whether Yunlan would abide the contract he had supposedly signed.
Of course he would. Someone had trusted in him and Zhao Yunlan would not betray that trust.
*
It didn’t take long for him to figure that out – whoever he had been with, had taken the same deal, including the memory wipe. So they were working for Hell too.
It didn’t narrow down the suspects – Hell was now a huge enterprise, with multiple branches and troubles with international relations and the distribution of souls, as well as expected results at the end of the month. With the amount of work the Underworld Police had, Zhao Yunlan had no time to walk around and ask other employees if they weren’t his long lost love by any chance.
He wondered if this would be one of the romantic scenes, when they would see one another and everything would come back to them: the world would come to a screeching halt, Zhao Yunlan would look into their eyes and he would just know. He knew it was just wishful thinking, this could not work this way – the deal stated that he had a specific number of years to work through and there was nothing about getting his memories back. All he would get was another chance at life, this time with that special someone at his side.
“Why do you do this?” he asked Zhu Hong at some point, taking a drag of his cigarette and watching the rest of their team haul the unresponsive body of the ghost with them. Once again, they managed not to cause too many damages, there was no need to call on the mighty Ghostlayer – the other teams were terrified whenever they had to summon him, ashamed of their own lack of power and preparation, but Zhao Yunlan’s had never had to, not yet. They were that good.
“Because I want something out of my new life, why else?” The young woman replied, giving Zhao Yunlan an annoyed look. He ignored it – despite her outward hostility, he knew she was a bit sweet on him, and more importantly, she was a good officer so he could tolerate her prickliness,he supposed.
“Anything specific?”
Zhu Hong blinked at him, the report she had been checking long forgotten.
“It is a bit personal, don’t you think?” Zhao Yunlan nodded. Maybe it was, he just couldn’t help being nosy.
“Don’t get so defensive, I’m not asking you to share your backstory with me, I am simply curious – do you remember the reason?”
There was something undecipherable on her face, and she looked down, pretending to read the report again, even though it was already filled out in her precise, elegant strokes.
Zhao Yunlan granted her this moment of privacy and his eyes rested on the rest of his team.
These were good kids. Younger than him, but good at their jobs, most of them detectives during their recent lifetimes. He wondered why they all decided to stop after this life, what made them take this deal now – were everyone offered one after they died but they just couldn’t recall? Or did you have to die with desperation in your heart, with a longing strong enough for the Judges of Hell to take pity on you?
“I do remember. Of course I do, everyone else does, why else would they agree…” Zhu Hong trailed off, noticing Zhao Yunlan’s expression.
“You don’t, do you?” She asked in wonder, and Zhao Yunlan decided that he was actually done with this conversation.
“Alright, let’s move it! Or I will call the Ghostslayer and tell him my team cannot deal with a subdued prisoner!” he barked, and walked closer to them, antagonizing them good-naturedly, ignoring Zhu Hong’s inquisitive gaze on his back.
*
Meeting the Ghostslayer changed everything.
Mostly because Zhao Yunlan was once again very, very confused. There was no sudden return of memory, and truly, if he had to say why he kept on bothering the Ghostslayer so much, he would say ‘because I like his face’ and call it a day. Except… that wasn’t all.
Of course, the human form the Ghostslayer took on his sporadic visits to the surface was absolutely gorgeous, so it was not that anyone could fault Zhao Yunlan for appreciating it, but even though he kept on repeating that this was just that, there was more.
There was a certain rhythm to them, after that first meeting at Chu Shuzhi’s ill-fated antique shop it turned out that talking to the Ghostslayer was… easy. Interesting, exhilarating. It didn’t matter if they were discussing a case or the state of humanity, it felt right to just fall into step with the powerful entity and tease him, offer his own opinions and ideas, from the most atrocious to the most brilliant.
And the Ghostslayer seemed to feel it too.
Sometimes, Zhao Yunlan hoped that somehow, the Ghostslayer was the one he made a promise to.
It was, of course, impossible – how would he, a mere human, ever meet the Ghostslayer, whom even the Kings feared? What would Ghostslayer find in him, that would be worth such devotion?
And yet, years changed into decades and there was no one else that could catch Zhao Yunlan’s eye.
There were moments when he would sit at the Guardian Lantern and curse himself. How could he be so fickle? Someone had bet on their love for one another, doing all of this to build a new happy life with him. A person was ready to gamble for him, trusted him so much… And there Zhao Yunlan was, with no memory of them, chasing after the Ghostslayer.
Was Zhao Yunlan an unfaithful scum when alive?
No, not to his knowledge, but the gaps, the person-shaped hole in his memory, it made him question everything.
Who did I use to be, when I was with you? he would think, though it happened less and less these days.
With Chu Shuzhi’s hostile friendship and with Xiao Guo’s bubbly optimism that went terribly well with his bad luck, Zhao Yunlan had his hands full with the Guardian Lantern. The mess and noise, especially with the upcoming Festival in Hell that required them to recruit Lin Jing, kept Zhao Yunlan away from the moral dilemmas.
And then, there would be these moments when the Ghostslayer would come to visit, offering different cases as pretexts, and all of Zhao Yunlan’s worries would subside, something inside him settling down.
“I look forward to your team’s performance,” the Ghostslayer said, his voice even warmer on the surface, handing the leaflet about the event to Zhao Yunlan, barely looking at it.
“This is going to be a disaster, my lord,” Chu Shuzhi warned from behind the counter, and the Ghostslayer acknowledged him with a nod. Didn’t stop looking at Zhao Yunlan though.
“I am certain it is not true.” There was a glint in the Ghostslayer’s eyes that made Yunlan’s heart jump – in excitement or recognition, he was not sure.
“We will do our best, of course,” he replied, giving the Hell’s enforcer a winning smile.
He wondered if it would be appropriate for him to ask about the man’s story – was he born in Hell? Did he become the Ghostslayer after death? But he swallowed the question, as usual. Maybe the Ghostslayer would tell him on his own, one day. Maybe Yunlan would figure that out on his own.
Maybe the Ghostslayer himself didn’t know the answer - maybe he too, had traded his memory for a chance for something better.
“Is Your Lordship taking part in the competition too?” Xiao Guo piped up, appearing next to their table with the teas. The Ghostslayer usually drank a cup of tea and nothing else, but recently he also started to indulge and had eaten a few meals with Zhao Yunlan, watching him wolf down Lao Chu's cooking with something that looked a lot like happiness. Or maybe Yunlan was seeing something that simply wasn’t there.
“Oh, no. I will award the prize to the winner.”
Zhao Yunlan ignored the excited questions coming from Lin Jing’s table, because ever since the kid has been drafted to their team his presence at the Guardian Lantern increased in frequency and tuning him out was a very useful life skill if one wanted to protect one’s sanity and good mood. He concentrated instead on the Ghostslayer’s words.
“And what is the prize?”
The powerful enforcer of Hell who made the Kings themselves quake, ducked his head slightly, his cheeks slighly pink.
“Nothing exciting, I am afraid. I can answer one question the winning team has.”
Zhao Yunlan’s heart started to beat faster.
“Any question?”
There was no mistaking it – the Ghostslayer looked embarrassed now.
“One I know the answer to,” he amended, and Zhao Yunlan… Zhao Yunlan could do things with that.
He could ask the Ghostslayer…
What would he even ask?
Are you the one I am waiting for?
Are you waiting for me?
Could you love me?
It was all useless if the Ghostslayer was not the one – the moment Zhao Yunlan remembered, it would cause them both immense heartbreak and it was a risk he–It was a risk.
A new idea appeared in Zhao Yunlan’s mind.
“Perfect!” he said happily, drawing the attention of everyone at the restaurant.” You certainly know the answer to my question, Your Lordship,” he added, and pretended he didn’t hear Chu Shuzhi’s offended huff coming from the direction of the counter.
The Ghostslayer’s smile turned sly.
“I wish you a swift victory then, Zhao Yunlan,” he replied, seemingly tonelessly, but Zhao Yunlan caught the sliver of something else than mere politeness – anticipation.
Maybe the Ghostslayer wasn’t who Zhao Yunlan was waiting for, maybe Zhao Yunlan just wanted him to be. But the Ghostslayer seemed to want that too.
“I make it a habit not to lose at games I play,” Zhao Yunlan assured.
It sounded a lot like a vow.