Chapter Text
“I can’t be here long, but I had to see you before I left.”
Steve feels his stomach knot tight with emotion. His throat feels thick, his tongue heavy, unable to form words as he stares into Billy’s sorrowful eyes.
Home. Hawkins isn’t Billy’s home, obviously. It never was.
And now that he’s free, with his diploma and belongings tucked away in his luggage in the backseat of the Camaro, which is idling with a full tank of gas in Steve’s driveway, he’s ready to go.
He’s leaving everything behind him, to go home to familiarity, from where he’d been snatched away in the night. He’s leaving his father behind, he’s leaving his step mom and sister behind, he’s leaving the monsters behind.
He’s leaving Steve behind.
And it’s sudden. Unexpected. It’s dark outside, where Steve’s standing at the threshold of his front door, in his pyjamas and slippers, while Billy looks like he’s ready to run towards clear skies and saltwater beaches.
“Oh,” Steve finally whispers, his voice thin and shaky.
Billy grabs his hands and holds them. His palms are sweaty from the nerves.
He murmurs, “I gotta go, tonight. He’s not home and Susan said she’d keep him busy once he is.”
The longer Neil doesn’t know that Billy’s gone, the better of a chance he has to get away.
Tears burn Steve’s eyes, because it wasn’t supposed to be like this. He knew Billy was going to go one day, he needed to go home and Steve wasn’t going to stop him, especially when he can’t follow him, not now. But, they were going to make it special - a whole day for themselves, something to mark the occasion of a temporary goodbye until Steve could make the journey back to his home in the form of blond curls and unwavering strength.
But, now it’s dark outside and Billy has to go.
His boyfriend notices the unshed tears and cups Steve’s face in his hands, steps closer until there’s barely an inch between them and he claims Steve’s mouth with his own. It’s soft and harsh, full of apologies and regret, and despite it all, hope. It’s bittersweet and cracks his heart wide open.
Steve doesn’t realize tears have fallen until their kiss tastes like salt, but they’re not his. They never are.
Billy pulls away and Steve sees the way the moonlight catches on his boyfriend’s wet, freckled cheeks.
“Here,” Billy whispers, grabbing his necklace and pulling it over his head. Steve feels another wave of something overwhelming as Billy places it over his head like a crown, feeling the warm metal on the nape of his neck while the pendant rests against his chest.
He watches the way Billy eyes the necklace, emotions crossing his face one after the other, until their eyes meet again and Billy whispers, “To remember me.”
Forget-me-nots.
Steve immediately unclasps the watch on his wrist, pulling the brown leather through the silver closure until it’s in his hand and then he’s wrapping it around Billy’s bare wrist, closing it around his skin.
He looks up at Billy, catches the way the blond’s bottom lip is trembling ever so softly, and lifts the watch up to press a kiss to it. “To remember me,” he echoes quietly, listening to the soft ‘tickticktick’ of the watch against his mouth.
“I gotta go,” Billy murmurs, but there’s clear doubt in his face and voice, like he isn’t sure if this is the right thing to do anymore. He doesn’t want to leave Steve, he doesn’t want to leave them, but there’s no way Steve will let him stay.
Not when Billy’s so close to freedom. To living a life where he doesn’t have to be afraid anymore.
“Yeah,” Steve nods as he lowers Billy’s hand, “You do.” But he can’t let go of Billy’s wrist. He can’t uncurl his fingers, can’t pull away, so Billy pulls him in for one last kiss.
It’s deep, slow, soothing. Like a promise.
“It’s not forever,” Steve whispers the reminder into the blond’s mouth, keeping his voice steady even as grief wraps around his throat. He pulls away to look at Billy, into his watery blues, and manages a small smile, “And we’ll call, every day, until I’m there with you, yeah?”
Billy can’t speak, but he nods, quick with a sniffle. It’s not forever. It’s not long at all.
They pull away at the same time and Billy doesn’t linger. He gets into his car while wiping away his tears and drives off after a moment of hesitation, leaving behind his heart in Hawkins, Indiana.
Steve stands there for another moment, listening to the roar of the Camaro down the highway, and goes inside once the silence of the night is all he has. He closes the door quietly, locking it tight, and stuffs Billy’s necklace under his shirt collar to feel the cool metal against his skin.
And there, leaning against the door, with his heart driving west, he finally lets himself cry.