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Staring at the top of the icy mountain, Albedo sat motionless...alone and undistracted, the view was perfect, a brilliant portrait-to-be.
Beauty...a sight worth seeing, a sight worth the time, something worth for its outer appearance. Is beauty what contributes to love? People love others because they're beautiful, nice to look at...a name for this is aesthetic attraction, attraction to someone because of their outer appearance. Is this cold landscape just like "love"? Beautiful, calm looking but ultimately dangerous.
Calm, the white snow that blankets the ground of the frigid region seemed calm, quiet, beautiful, too many adjectives but all the same. It all came down to beauty, maybe outer appearances were not something to consider when in love.
What about other traits? Characteristics? Is that all? Just go with whatever suits you and go with that? Is that all there really is?
Frustrated by his own thoughts, he puts down his brush and attempts to organize his materials when a familiar figure walking toward him.
"Packing up?"
"I was about to, until I saw you here Kaeya...tell me, what are you doing?"
"I merely wanted to visit you, My Prince~" Kaeya teasingly replied, "jokes aside, I'm here to check on some things."
Kaeya, known to be one of the most secretive of all the knights, would somehow, always spill his thoughts when with the Chief Alchemist. It wasn't strange at first until a month ago when he thought confessing his feelings would be a fun little conversation starter –yeah, no, everything fell silent after that– odd.
"What, may I ask, is it that you're checking up on?"
"Even though Dragonspine is no where near my area of expertise, they said it had something to do with a rather large group of treasure hoarders."
"What are they doing in Dragonspine?"
"That's what I'm tasked to find out."
Although, half of it was a lie. True, a number of treasure hoarders were spotted near Dragonspine but they have no business in the mountain itself and were already dealt with accordingly, he just wanted an excuse to be with Albedo for a longer period of time.
The blonde continues to pack up trying to signal to the other that he may continue with his business, however, he didn't seem to want to move, in fact, he helped with the packing and even carried most of the supplies to the camp. The walk to the camp was...cold...really cold, nothing Albedo wasn't used to but he worried for Kaeya who's often out and about in the warm sun rather than the unforgiving cold, but it seems that he was worried for nothing.
Worry, is that something to consider for love? You worry about that person? As a mother worries for her child, as a child worried for his friend, as a husband worries for his wife? Worry, care, would one be able to conclusively say that this is love?
When they arrived at Albedo's camp, they individually do a task, Kaeya starts a fire while Albedo cleans up some space for them.
"Love is like an open flame, they say." Kaeya prompted
"How?" It's evident that Albedo wants an answer, and he wants it now, no need for any more glorified explanations, just straight to the point reasoning. Kaeya replied in the most honest way he could by saying: "Let's see, unpredictable, beautiful, painful... and many others."
Of course, why did I expect a conclusive answer? I know, I of all people, know that there will be differing answers to my questions. As a scientist, it's fine if your hypothesis is wrong after experimentation, but I can't even properly form mine with the question I have and it's super frustrating...Argh! What is love?
A calm voice called out to the man beside him "Kaeya, I have a question I'd like you to answer, of course, that's only if you can." Kaeya responded with a nod and a curious look on his face while Albedo hesitated whether he should ask the question or a different one. He took a deep breath and sighed before finally speaking.
"What is love? Is it the human desire of wanting someone to spend your time with? If so, why do people 'fall in love'? Then, is love a strong sense of caring for the needs of the other? But people 'love' others because they need something...so what is love? Human emotions...not even I can decipher them"
Kaeya sat there, frozen for a few moments. They felt a silence fall upon them, Albedo would have retracted his question but Kaeya spoke gently.
"Love is not explainable, it's a feeling, it's uncertainty of what's to come, it is everything you said and more, probably less, who knows? The answer I can give you is only that you should trust what you believe is love for you. My love, is admiration, I admire this figure in front of me, I respect his every achievement, and desire every moment of my life to be spent with him. My love appears selfish, for now considering your feelings, towards me, towards the world and towards love and romance. Dearest Kreideprinz, love is a feeling that differs from one individual to another, as far as I want to believe, you love me, with the way you look at me, talk to me and treat me, love is sometimes a raging, unstoppable fire or a deep and mysterious ocean, no one knows which one is true but all are present in one form or another. Love and like, similar yet very different, wouldn't you agree? Love is understood as romantic while like has less of an effect and seen as platonic...truly, human emotions are hard to understand."
"That...can you really say this is 'love'?"
"I can't say it's anything else but, who am I to dictate what you feel?"
"Kaeya..."
Another silence falls upon the pair, it seems that getting an answer may have opened more questions, or maybe closed some possibilities? Who knows, after all, the human is hard to understand, not even a human can understand themselves. All that's clear is Albedo desires to have Kaeya in his life, to spend the rest of their days together, to worry about each other, to care for each other, to have and to hold.
Albedo closed the gap between him and the Cavalry Captain as they joined in a tender embrace, he couldn't help but think it felt great to have Kaeya there, holding onto him, with him doing the same.
"So, this is love?"
"It can be, My Price~♡"
"What if it's just an obsession? an idea that you don't want to let go?"
"For example?"
"Me. I don't really know if what I feel for you is the same for you, I may just be obsessed with the attention you give me, the feelings that I might be feeling is a feeling of not wanting to let go of your attention, make it mine and no one else's."
"Well, that can also be love, wanting someone's undivided attention for yourself, though if you take drastic actions to make sure of that then it's a twisted form of love. That is unhealthy, but you, Albedo, you don't want to be controlling, you're not forcing me to stay by your side and threaten me to do something bad to any of us if I did let go, even if I'm the one who loves you first."
"...I can't say I love you yet, Kaeya"
"It's ok, I'll wait until you can."
