Work Text:
It's on a snowy, almost-Christmas evening when Choi Soobin fully admits to himself that he's one goddamn coward.
He's sitting on a freezing cold swing set, gaze fixed on the love of his life his best friend, Kai, as the latter busied himself with making snowmen. It was seven in the evening and the playground inside their neighborhood, where they decided to play around in the snow, is basically empty - which is perfect for Soobin, but at the same time, is also terrible for him because now there's a heavy weight of pressure sitting on his shoulders which makes him want to stand up and run away from the scene before him.
See, Soobin has been trying to confess to his best friend for literal years. His feelings for Kai started four years ago when they were both fourteen. He doesn't remember much from that age but the realization of his not-so-platonic feelings for Kai is a memory that continues to burn at the back of his mind to this day, taunting him to finally grow the balls and admit to his best friend what he so desperately needs to.
But Soobin's fears of rejection and possibly losing Kai forever weighs more than his need to spill his growing affection for the boy. It's the thought of it which hindered him and forced him to actively hide his fondness like the self-proclaimed loser he is.
Because what do you even do when it comes down to it and you get rejected? Laugh it off? Cry in front of him? Hide away forever? All of the fucking above?
Still, he doesn't completely cross off ‘confessing’ on his list. Since they're both high school seniors now, Soobin thinks it's about time to finally do it - just to get it out of his system before they go off to college and possibly drift apart if they ever decide on applying to different universities. If he gets rejected (and he solemnly thinks there's a high chance he will), at least he'll go on with his sad, sad life knowing that he got it out there. At the very least, Kai would know and there wouldn't be a ‘what if’ left to overthink about.
Now, as for his plan of action:
What he thought of wasn't at all complicated. First, he wanted it to be on Christmas day - or at least a day closer to it so he'll have an excuse to give Kai a present without it being too out of the blue and suspicious.
Next, he'll need to get the boy alone and for that, he suggested the idea of making snowmen at the playground two days before Christmas day. Kai accepted his invitation without question since they've done it before on more than one occasion and at this point, is closer to a tradition between the two of them.
Lastly, he needs to put his confession on the gift he'll give to Kai. For it, he decided to be corny yet bold by buying them couple bracelets. He'd seen a magnetic, white and black pair of couple bracelets as he was scrolling through an online shop a few weeks prior and decided that not only did the design fit the both of them but giving it to Kai would definitely get the message across - or at least raise suspicion on the other that would leave an opening for Soobin to blurt out his confession smoothly.
He'd done two of the steps in his plan so far and the only thing left is for him to hand Kai his gift along with his heart and pray to god the boy won't crush it in his palm.
Deciding that there's no use stalling, Soobin calls Kai and asks for him to sit on the empty swing next to him. He then brings out the gift from his coat pocket and hands it to the boy, to which Kai immediately unwrapped in excitement.
But his expression changes as soon as he opens the box.
“Oh..” Kai utters out, looking up at Soobin with a fervent question in his eyes. “It's a.. couple bracelet?” He adds, sounding unsure with furrowed brows and a tilt of his head.
Soobin internally screams.
This is it. This is your chance. You got this. Go for it, Soobin. Stop being a pussy and just go for it-
“No, they aren't.”
Fuck.
He breathes in deep and everything goes still for a moment.
“They're friendship bracelets.”
Double fuck.
Kai squints his eyes in confusion but there's a smile of amusement forming on his lips. “Are you sure?” He asks again, “'Cos I'm pretty positive I've seen these babies floating around the internet and being marketed as ‘couple bracelets’.”
“Well, um..” Soobin clear his throat and hides his shaky hands inside his coat pockets. “I bought them from an online store and it says there that they're friendship bracelets.”
Kai still looks unconvinced. “Yeah but..” he fiddles with the half-heart shaped magnet attached to it, “But doesn't this give it away though? I mean, what kind of friends wear matching bracelets with magnets like this?”
“Really close friends.” Soobin replies immediately, “Like us.”
Kai laughs out loud and nods his head, holding in giggles even as he takes the bracelet out of the box and asks Soobin to put it on for him. He then asks Soobin to roll up his sleeve so he can put the other bracelet on him. Kai admires them for a while, making Soobin hold his hand so the half-heart magnets would join together and form a whole one.
“See? It works like this.” He holds up their joined hands so Soobin could observe them better. “I can't believe you got tricked into buying couple bracelets- I mean, it's kinda romantic but mostly funny 'cos the fact that you haven't caught on 'til now is pretty dumb of you, Binie.” Kai lets go of his hand and covers his mouth to contain his giggles.
Soobin just rolls his eyes in dismissal, because he is pretty dumb - but not in that way.
They end up walking home together after Kai becomes satisfied with the number of snowmen he'd created around the playground. The walk is mostly spent in silence - because Kai becomes somewhat fixated on his new bracelet, while Soobin laments over the fact that he'd failed on executing his plan for the very last time.
When they reach the front porch of Kai's home, the boy turns to Soobin while wearing a sweet smile.
“Thanks for the gift, Soobinie.”
He whispers and then looks down on his shoes.
“But.. I think I would've preferred it if you said what you wanted to say to me back there.”
Soobin's eyes grow wide when he digests the words. Suddenly, his world stops spinning for a whole minute and his lungs feel like they'll rupture at any second.
“W-what?” He asks dumbly, holding onto the hope that he'd heard it wrong.
“You know I was honestly so happy when I opened your gift because I thought: finally, he's gonna do it after all this time.. so I'm a bit disappointed that you continued to deny it until the very last minute.” Kai muses while Soobin, on the other hand, still stands there looking like a deer in the headlights.
“What- Kai, I don't understand-”
“I knew you were planning on confessing to me tonight, Soobinie.” The boy says outright, patience thinning out. “In fact, I knew you were trying to do it for years now.” He adds, “I've been aware of your feelings since ages ago but I didn't want to rush you into confessing. I wanted you to move on your own pace so I didn't say anything.”
There's a million questions running around Soobin's mind but the only thing he can utter out is a meek “How did you know?"
“I'm not as oblivious as I seem, Binie.” Kai replies, “You're the one who's unaware about a lot of things between the both of us, because if you weren't, you would've known by now that I like you, too.” The boy says seriously while staring at him right in the eye.
Soobin wants to faint.
No, actually-
He kinda wants to die from all the emotions he feels at the moment.
“You.. like me?”
“Yes!” Kai almost yells in exasperation. “I like you, you stupidly oblivious creature. I've liked you for an awfully long time now and I was dying to tell you since forever but I wanted you to tell me first but you're taking way too long so fuck it!” He finishes his mini rant with a huff, eyes boring into Soobin.
“I'm sorry- I..” And for some reason, Soobin feels like he's going to bawl. “I was just scared. I was terrified of what you might think of me after I confessed- of what will happen to us if I spilled my guts and get rejected.”
He hears a sigh and before he knows it, Kai's already inching closer to him and wrapping his arms around his neck. “But you see,” He starts, “There's no way in hell I'm rejecting you after doing all that shit so,” He gently tugs on the hair by Soobin's nape to ease him. “If you still want to, you can say what you want to say right now.”
“I like you, Kai-ya.” The other says it without an ounce of hesitation. “I've liked you ever since we were fourteen.”
Kai can't help the grin stretching on his lips, feeling a surge of happiness course through him at the sound of those words.
“I like you too, Soobin-ah.” His gaze then lands on the other's lips. “So..” He trails off, “Are you gonna kiss me anytime soon or do I need to take the lead again?”
Instead of replying, Soobin pulls Kai in by the waist and captures his lips with his own.
Bonus:
After their emotional confessions, the new lovers don't say their goodnights to each other just yet. They remain seated by the porch of Kai's house, hands joined together and leaning onto each other.
“You know you're not the only one who's good with plans.” Kai breaks the silence, “I thought of a backup plan myself in case we really didn't end up confessing tonight.”
Soobin squeezes his hand, “And that is?”
“Look up there.” He nods towards the doorway and Soobin follows him in his line of sight.
There, on top of the door, sits a mistletoe.
He can't help but chuckle. “A mistletoe?”
“Yeah.” Kai grins. “So, you should know, even if this whole messy confession didn't happen, we'd still end kissing anyway.” He boasts, “I made it so you practically had no choice.”
“You're unbelievable.”
Kai giggles and leans in to steal a kiss. “Unbelievably smart, I know.”