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Climbing down from the wagon, the boy stretched his arms over his head. There was a crackling noise as he rolled his neck and laughed to himself. "You hear that, Don?"
Turning, he watched as the woman lead the horse over to the stream, securing the reins as she had the wagon. She still grimaced at the nickname, and he couldn't quite tell from the distance between them but he sensed that maybe her worry lines didn't carve as deep that time. She was getting better. "This trip's turning me into you!"
"You're the one who begged to come along," She chided back in mock annoyance, going back to the wagon to consult her map. "We're coming up on Corona now."
"Way ahead of schedule! What if we stopped in town, huh?"
Donella looked over at him from the top of her paper, hiding a grin as she watched him stretch his leg over his head. This boy. "You'd hate Corona."
"Have you been?" Hugo pushed, skirting over and standing on his toes to look over her shoulder at their charted routes. Slowly but surely he was prying more out of her, unearthing the scattered shards of her past.
A pause, her breath caught in her throat briefly. Had she been? She knew that old dirt path through the forest like the back of her hand, she could still picture how the lanterns reflected in those blue eyes every festival, and if she closed her eyes the smell of freshly baked bread ticked her nose. Taking in a breath, she held it, counted to ten, and let it go- came back to him. She folded the paper delicately with a shrug. "You get five minutes before we leave, Kid. Meet me back here."
The blond took in a breath, about to ask again before his mentor shot him a silencing look. His lips closed and, hiding his disappointment with a lighthearted shrug and smile, he turned to take a short walk in the surrounding forest.
He found himself heading along the river's edge, towards the kingdom until the tip of the castle just managed to come into view. Squinting, Hugo still couldn't help but marvel at the blue sky, something that was becoming rarer to see among the smoke and fog of his city streets.
Walking a few more strides, suddenly his feet tangled up underneath him, and down he fell onto the dirt, immediately looking down to see what was the culprit. A yelp escaped his lips as he pushed himself into a sitting position and scooted away from the- he wasn't really sure what it was, some red mass.
Slowly, after he observed how the object didn't move, he crept closer to make out the contorted face of a squirrel with all its hair standing up straight in fear. It was almost frozen in a casing of red amber- he poked it to find the once soft pelt hard as ice.
There was whispering around him, he lifted his head quickly and got to his feet, glancing towards the bush where the sound seemed to originate. A gloved hand pushed away the leaves to find a glowing red rock growing from the ground with a strangely powerful feeling pulsing from it.
~~
Tapping her foot, she leaned against the tree with her arms crossed over her chest. "Hugo!" The woman called out, glancing around as she heard rustling from the bushes. "There you are! What have I told you about time-"
Her face fell when a little metal rat ran out and scurried over to her, squeaking at her as it climbed up her pant leg and settled on her shoulder. With a sigh, she lifted a finger and scratched it between the ears, something that the animal enjoyed quite a bit as she closed her eyes and leaned into the touch, back leg twitching.
"Of course, I'm not disappointed to see you, Olivia dear. But I'm looking for my other rat, and he's not nearly as well behaved as you." Straightening, she brought her other hand to her mouth and cupped it around her lips.
"Hugo! I'm gonna count to three and your ass better be here! One!" Taking a couple steps towards where he disappeared, she squinted at the shrubs. "Two!" A sigh as she felt Olivia climbing down and settling in her pocket. "Two and a half! Two and three quarters!"
Eventually, she sighed and rested her hands on her hips, trudging off into the forest. Pausing for a moment, Donella glanced to the side as if expecting someone's or something's reaction to the way she was right now, all out of sorts over some child.
"When did I get like this?" She muttered to an oak before walking away.
~~
Reaching out, his fingers hovered from the surface before that equally annoying and comforting voice rang in his ear. Right, he pulled away, don't touch things you didn't fully understand. Still though, the whispering persisted and he dug through the shrubbery looking for the source. Fragments of sentences gained coherence before disappearing.
A child?
How will we afford-
Burden
Useless
Hugo grunted and stood quickly, stumbling back against his wishes and covering his ears with his palms. In the corners of his vision, shadows of memories he didn't even have festered. Despite the low rumbling his hands created, one sentence slipped through the cracks of his fingers.
We don't want him
Gritting his teeth, he jerked his head up and forced his fists back down to his sides. "Hell if I care! I'm doing fine!" The words were spat out with force like he had to convince himself of their worth.
His heel dug into the dirt as he spun away, blindly rushing back towards the tree line because of course someone was waiting for him. He could already picture her glancing at her watch, that annoyed wrinkle appearing on the bridge of her nose. She was expecting him.
"Don!" His face lit up as the woman he was thinking of emerged from the forest, her green eyes locking on him as he ran up. "Yeah yeah I know I'm late but I swear I'm ready now!"
He reached out to link his elbow around hers, a gesture that often got him an affectionate push. She jerked away from his grasp- the way she practically glared at him made his blood run cold.
"What are you talking about?" The syllables were sharp, rigid. He took a small step back and felt his shoulders shrink in. Donella talked to those upper-class snobs like that, maybe the occasional rude patron- but never him. Never.
"I- Our trip." As he spoke, he wheezed slightly. His throat was closing, barely a whisper escaped his lips. He hated how she could do that to him, how the idea of her disapproval shrank his lungs no matter how much he tried not to care. "I'm ready to go now. I swear, Don-"
A pause as she seemed to take in his words. She always did that when she was thinking, sometimes when she was teasing him. Yeah, she was just joking around in her Donella way and maybe he didn't completely understand that or her but he was getting there. They were getting-
"What makes you think you're coming?"
And just like that, his stomach fell to his heels. "I- I guess I assumed that-"
"Ha!" Her laugh was sharp, it made him flinch and put a few more feet between them. Dark alleyways, men too under the influence to overlook him. They were cruel, the streets were too. She had been different, he thought she was. "You assumed what? That you'd be able to help me?"
He nodded despite his better judgment. Her eyes squinted at him in a jeer. "Don't flatter yourself. You stopped being useful ages ago, your productivity's plateaued to match my other thieves and- well, they don't eat my food and take up space in my home, do they?"
"No, they don't," And suddenly the last few years washed away, and he was that scared little boy wearing clothing two sizes too big with no place to go.
"Glad you seemed to retain something I've taught you," She scoffed, it threatened to cut him down, "Not a total waste of time. Use those skills to find your way to Corona, since you seemed so interested in that stupid kingdom." Her voice pulled into a mocking chide as she uttered the name, turning on her heel.
"Wait!" He couldn't help it, reaching out despite having nothing to grab onto. "Don- Donella," He corrected, hating the way his voice sounded meek. In his shock, his fear, there was no cockiness or joke to hide behind. There was just him, and like the thin fabric of his old street clothes, it clearly wasn't enough to keep out the chill.
"Was I really just another thief to you?"
When he was a kid, he always admired how sharp his mentor was. Every move was calculated, every word carefully mulled over- sometimes a little too much. His stomach churned more and more as she considered what to say, eventually meeting his eye. And he searched, he really did, for something behind her gaze that would make everything okay again. But he found nothing but distance and contempt.
"That implies you meant something to me in the first place."
His shoulders tensed as if he had been struck in the chest, but no physical blow came. Watching as she turned away stiffly and disappeared into the shadows, he swore he could hear his heart shattering underneath the sound of her footsteps. "Fi- Fine!"
He hadn't expected himself to sprint blindly into the trees. But there he was, trying to outrun his own tears as they quickly overtook his pace.
~~
"I swear where did he run off to- I mean it's not that big of a forest. Right, Olivia?" Donella glanced down at the rat who had hunkered down for a nap in her pocket. "Oh well, I guess everything's pretty big to you... Sorry."
She turned on her heel upon hearing steps- running- and put one foot back as if getting ready to fight. A boy streaked towards her, almost barreling her over if she hadn't steadied herself beforehand. "Kid, what the hell-" He stumbled away from her, writhing out of her hands' attempt to hold onto his shoulders. Pausing, she saw how he struggled to keep tears from falling and how his chest heaved in hyperventilation. Suddenly, her annoyance dissipated and her tone softened, "Hey, are you okay?"
"You're not- I-" Hugo yelped when she reached out, despite her slow movements and concerned expression. "I thought- I thought you were-" He coughed then gagged, the words tripping over themselves as they tried to form.
"Kid," She said it a bit firmly to get his attention, "Breathe, you're okay."
A shutter rattled his chest as he forced his shoulders back and stood straighter. He sniffed, wiping his eyes with his sleeve quickly and nodding to let Donella know that he was collecting himself. "I- You're not leaving me?"
"Leaving you?" Her voice cracked with surprise, "I've been looking everywhere for you!" At that, she noticed the dirt on his pants and stepped closer, leaning down despite him being close to her height. Her touch was gentle as she guided his face, lifting his chin to get a better look. "Did you fall? Hit your head? Where does it hurt? How many fingers-"
Okay, now he was really confused. "Wa- Don, I'm fine!" Hugo didn't mean to snap the way he did, shrugging off his previous distress like it was nothing more than a dream or an illusion. He swatted her hand away and sighed. "When was the last time you talked to me?"
"Just now?" She paused, processing the question again, "Back at the wagon before you ran off. Why? What happened?"
Glancing over his shoulder, he could feel the memory of that pit in his stomach- barely there but pressing. "Nothing, nothing."
She didn't seem convinced by his answer and pushed past, "Did you get scared by a moth or something again?" A hint of teasing laughter in her voice.
He hurried after her, jogging a bit to catch up. "That was one time! And Don, what about our schedule? Let's hit the road! Come on- you hate being late!"
She shot him a look that basically told him he wasn't getting out of this as they walked back towards the clearing. "You're being weird." The last time she failed to investigate someone's strange behavior, it didn't exactly end well.
"I just really think we shouldn't-" He sighed as she crossed the clearing, following his faint footsteps in the dirt to the shrub.
She was about to make a... slightly crude joke to lighten the mood, but the soft glow of red caught her vision before she could speak. Stepping closer, Donella used her foot to push aside the leaves, watching the way her reflection widened its eyes at her. "Fascinating."
Almost another lifetime ago she encountered something similar. Glancing over at the way Hugo seemed to cower from where she was standing, she tried to ignore how her heart twisted in her chest in this bittersweet manner as she remembered Ulla pouring herself over the rock's black counterpart. She'd hum to herself as she worked, a tune Donella always seemed to hear in the wind or aftermath of a storm.
But there was no breeze that day, and yet there it drifted in the air. Part melody, part forgotten whisper, her eyes darted to the side despite her better judgment. A double take, her words were barely audible. "Ulla?"
"Don? Did you say something?" He glanced over from where he was standing, not cowering, and wrinkled his nose at the way she waved him off.
"What if we took a longer break, Kid? Just for a bit." Though her voice didn't seem all there. What could this be? The black rocks emerged from the moonstone- was it such a stretch to think that they could affect time? Was it such a stretch to hope she could have her back?
"Now who's acting weird?" He teased but nodded, clicking his tongue for Olivia who scurried out of the woman's pocket and over to him. "Fine, but only because she needs some maintenance."
Her bottom lip quivered, her guard dropping as she heard Hugo settle down a bit away. "Tell me it's really you." One foot forwards seemed like a step backwards in a way.
The rips in the hem of her skirt, how her hair always floated around her in a phantom breeze, that smile- shit it was just as she remembered. How reassuring to know that she hadn't faded from her memory.
"Donnie!"
She almost fell over at the name. Stumbling towards her, Ulla closed the gap as they met in the middle. Her hand shook as she reached out, too afraid to touch her for fear that she'd be nothing more than the trick of the light. Blinking, her eyelashes clumped together and she saw through the haze of tears that the shorter was staring at her in her cheekily teasing manner.
"Don't tell me cold stoic Donnie’s all mushy."
Her lips pulled into a grin, the stiff skin on her right cheek tugging but she didn't care. They could deal with that later, they could fix it all later because at least now they had a tomorrow. It was too good to be... too good to be true. Wiping at her eyes, Donella faltered but Ulla seemed to detect that and brought a hand to cup the left side of her face.
A gasp, it felt so real. Like she was right there. Leaning into her touch, a shuddery breath left her lips. "I've missed you so much."
Laughter filled her ears, but it was different- and in her mind's vision flashed memories of a wicked grin, a forgotten Library, and two curses unrevoked. Fingers, nails actually, dug into her cheek- switching sides to run over at her scars. It burned, she burned. Try as she might, she couldn't move to swat her away- afraid of pain but also too terrified to fight her again, to hurt her again.
Her gaze fixated on Ulla's contorted face, a haze of teal flickering through her eyes. Donella felt her blood run cold, her entire body frozen. In her nightmares, she often saw the way her friend looked at her in her magically powered state- something akin to pure hatred and contempt. She wasn't sure if she could survive being glared at like that again, and this time it threatened to end her.
"You're dumber than I thought then," The vision growled. Because at this point she knew it wasn't real- or at least that's what she was telling herself. It wasn't real- she wouldn't survive it if it was. "Why would I ever care about you again? After you left me to rot!"
"I- I never meant- I never-" She sputtered and had to bite back a whimper.
"But you did! And you know what you did." Ulla's eyes narrowed, almost in mercy she let go and allowed the other to straighten, but she didn't run. Her feet, it was like they were glued to the ground. She couldn't move. "You killed me!"
"You left me no choice!" A tear slipped from her eye, stinging as it trailed down to her chin and dripped into the dirt. Many years ago, she watched as her own blood did the same, staining the bricks of the Eternal Library and their dreams. "If I could take it back-"
Ulla cut her off, scoffing. "But you didn't. You didn’t even try!" The spirit's voice cracked for a second, just a moment, strangely human. It bordered on a sob that made Donella's stomach twist in sickening remorse. The shorter's lip trembled for a split second before the rage returned, "You know what you did, that's why you hide it. Why you try to forget me! Why you left me behind!" Her hands balled into fists, she stood on her toes and practically spat in her face, "How will Hugo ever look at you the same if he found out?"
Donella felt her shoulder blades stiffen. Her eyes were on fire and she despised how hard it was to get the tears to stop. Maybe she always knew Ulla would hate her, but she wasn't prepared to hear it- she couldn't even find it in herself to hate her back. And after all these years she still didn’t know why she left, why she shut down- why she ran. She’d probably keep running until death overtook her, and then she’d die with that guilt deep in her chest. Maybe things could have been different if she stayed but it was too late for that now.
"I don't know." She eventually muttered.
"Don?" His voice pulled her attention away from the figure, glancing to the side to see the boy staring at her with- with fear in his gaze. That made her want to vomit. "What's she talking about?"
"You can see her too?" The words shook, her fingertips touched her chin in surprise because she couldn't believe that the sound came from her. It was helpless and trembling and pathetic.
This only seemed to delight the specter as she walked towards the boy. Donella tried to follow but she couldn't move her legs and if she tried she didn't think she could get to him without falling over.
"I'm talking about what dear ol' Donnie did to me, her best friend!" For a second, Ulla's head twitched to the side in an unnatural way, and even though her back was towards her, Donella could picture how her smile pulled a little too wide and her eyes glowed a little too bright. "Don't you ever wonder what she's hiding? The skeletons in her closet? I guess it's more- ghost but you get the metaphor."
His green eyes stared at her the same way they had when they first met- unsure, suspicious, afraid, as if he was too wary to dare hope for something good. "Don, did you... kill someone?"
Her answer, or lack thereof, seemed to be enough. The boy recoiled from her, staring at his own hands as if he was wondering how much of her spilled blood was his own. Somehow, she found herself able to step towards him.
"Hugo please- let me explain-" Reaching out a hand, he flinched at it.
"Don't touch me!" He shrieked back, causing her to shrink in on herself.
Donella didn't realize, but as her feet locked to the floor, her boots took on a red color that started to creep up her legs.
"How could- how could you keep this from me! All this time you acted like- how could you-" He sputtered, his expression morphing more into disgust as he stared at her with betrayal. "You monster."
All her breath left her body, her chest collapsed in on itself, and if it weren't for the artificial hardening of her muscles, she would have fallen over.
Ulla walked past her despite her protests, though she wasn't sure if her quiet 'get away from him' even made it past her constricting throat. The ghost, flickering between the woman she loved and the danger she vanquished, gestured at Hugo as if vindicated.
"Seriously! Like- who does that? Crossing her arms, she circled around the boy, one hand lingering on his shoulder as she walked. "She gets a career and I don't! She- she gets a life after taking mine!"
Somehow, a bit of humanity slipped back into the phantom's words, enough to make Donella's heart ache despite goosebumps littering her skin as Ulla's eyes started to glow bright and her feet lifted from the ground in her outrage. "You got to go home and I didn’t! You got to see my son again and I didn't! You- You get to move on and I'm still here!"
With a frustrated sob and flash of light, an image of a woman with tattered clothing, disheveled hair, and teal eyes without pupils flashed so bright Donella had to turn away. And then she was gone, and in her place- her boy fell to his knees as if cowering in pain.
"Hugo!" The only loud noise she could muster seemed to rub her throat raw. The metallic taste of blood.
He jumped up quickly from where he was shining Olivia's ears, taken aback by the sight. He never saw his mentor so expressive, true terror on her features and her shins glowing completely red. Fumbling, Olivia ran up his arm and to his shoulder as he hurried over to her. "Don! Don, I'm here!"
But the woman didn't react at all, her green eyes staring straight through him at something that blinded her.
Her hands were shaking, she couldn't look at them because her gaze was locked on him but she knew they were. They trembled as if the world was crumbling, slipping through her fingers like grains of sand, and the tighter she squeezed the faster it broke in her grasp.
The boy heaved, one hand pressing to his right cheek as he shuddered. Then, in a split second, he was looking at her- eyes brimming with tears and two jagged cuts trailing from his cheek to under his chin. It was too close to looking in a mirror- too close.
"No!" Donella cried out before her body locked into place. He felt the way her muscles froze under his hands as they held her shoulders.
The red was creeping now, almost to her chest and it picked up speed. Hugo didn't know what would happen, but somehow he knew he couldn't let it encase her fully- he just didn't know how to stop it, to help her.
The boy stared at his hand, completely covered in red liquid. Some of it was starting to dry dark brown on the edges. "You-" His voice started faint and then grew more disdainful as he met her gaze, tears prickling at her vision, "You did this to me! You did this!"
"Hey-" Hugo muttered even though he was pretty sure she couldn't hear him. His thumb carefully wiped at one of her tears as it fell down her face, catching it before it brushed over her scars. "Don, it's me. It's Hugo- please you have to fight it."
He didn't expect himself to get choked up or the words to come out the way they did, broken and crackly. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you the truth! I was embarrassed because you- you don't get scared of anything- I just wanted to be brave like you." His hands touched her neck as the red crept up, spreading over her throat and along the underside of her chin. Flinging himself forwards, he squeezed her stiff body tightly. Maybe in another situation, he would have laughed about how her petrified state didn't feel all that different from other instances he threw a hug at her. Not the time.
Hugo knew his tears were probably staining the fabric of her shoulder- unless the red coating affected that- but he didn't care and buried his face into her like he would when he was a kid startled by thunderstorms. Even after all this time, she was still comfort- she was still home. "Please Don, I need you- I need my mom."
He wasn't sure exactly when it happened or if the red even reached the top of her head, but after what felt like both an eternity and also a blink of an eye, he felt her soften slightly and lean into him.
She gasped, filling her chest to the point where it hurt- but it was the good kind of pain, the sorta that pulled her out of her head and back into her body. Donella felt her knees give way as she crumbled to the ground, though it wasn't as cold and hard as she expected. Blinking, she rubbed at her eyes quickly. "Hugo?"
Panic laced her tone as she grabbed him, her hands were rough and calloused against his skin, bringing his face closer. Her fingers shook, he could feel her hesitation as she touched him. "You're- you're okay! Oh, thank Demanitus."
He opened his mouth to speak but before he could Donella had already pulled him into a fierce hug. She grabbed onto the back of his shirt, tightening it over his chest, as if she was afraid if she didn't hold onto him then, she'd never get the chance to again.
It took him another moment to realize that she was crying, out of fear, relief, or something in between he wasn't sure. But judging by the shake of her body and the quiet sobs that escaped her clenched jaw as she leaned into his shoulder, he knew.
Slowly, he found himself gently holding her back- for the first time in his life too afraid to squeeze her for fear of breaking the woman clutching him like her life depended on him. Donella had always been so strong, the mountain that would not bow, and yet here she was. "It's okay, you're okay. I promise."
She held him as if she didn't believe that, cradling him in her arms like he was a boy again. "You're okay, you're okay." The woman repeated like she was trying to convince herself. Her hand cupped the back of his head, her touch fierce and also delicate.
"Don... you turned red- you- you almost turned into stone. What happened?" To his surprise, she didn't respond and pulled away, wiping at her eyes and turning her head to hide her tear-stained face. "It's okay," He eventually settled on, "We don't have to talk about it."
Sniffing, she pulled herself together the best she could. The way someone may fix something with tape, the pieces never truly fitting back together but still managing to hold on. Getting up, she let out a short breath and held out a hand to help Hugo stand, which he accepted without a word and came to terms with the fact that they weren't gonna be discussing this further.
Another stellar mother-son experience for the scrapbook. She started to stalk off, he kept a good distance between them. Then, it got smaller, and smaller- until he realized she stopped walking entirely.
Turning on her heel, her green eyes stared at him with intensity as Donella lightly grabbed his shoulders. "Hugo," She started and he found himself leaning into her touch, "You know everything I do is for your benefit, right? Even if it doesn't seem like it, I just- I just want you to be happy. That's all I want. You know this, right?"
A pause, he sighed and pushed her hand off his shoulder. Her heart dropped for a moment, until he pulled her into a hug. She stiffened under his arms but slowly melted into the embrace, resting her chin against his head and allowing her eyes to close- a moment of total safety was rare.
"I know, Don. I know."