Archive of Our Own

Hope seems to stray further and farther from Chan with each passing second he spends without Wonwoo by his side. Chan closes his eyes, rolls around the grass a bit, and stops with his back on the ground and his arms stretched out his sides. He would be lying if he said he wishes he had gotten used to this by now. Because as much as it pains him to leave this place by his own choice, he knows that the pain only hurts because he thinks of the underworld as his home.

That he thinks of Wonwoo as his home.

"I could say I'm surprised to see you here but at the same time it doesn't seem to be so surprising if one thinks about it." Chan smiles as he hears this and he sees the god of sleep and dreams smiling down at him.

"I am surprised to see you alone, though. You usually have your pet following you around." Jihoon walks up to him and he smiles as Jihoon looks around.

"Cerberus has his own duties, Jihoon."

"Oh, I was not referring to the hellhound." Jihoon quips and Chan at least finds himself smiling at that.

"He's busy." Chan adds. Because it's true. Wonwoo's always busy.

"And I think it's safe to assume that that pains you."

"It bothers me is what it does. He thinks I don't know that he only drowns himself in his duties to ease my leaving but he's all too… transparent." Jihoon nods and he sits next to Chan on the meadow and he lies back down.

"Knowing Wonwoo, I think you're downplaying him a little. He is the king of the underworld. Even you cannot take that away from him, I think."

"Perhaps. But you have to admit that there is a possibility that I could be right."

"And you have to admit that there is a possibility that you could be wrong. Wonwoo is a little too two dimensional at times, yes. But he's a lot more complex than we think he is. I think he's a lot more complex than he thinks he is. He may not seem like it, but he's still one of the oldest gods there is. And he is still one of the three most powerful ones at that." Jihoon reminds him and Chan would like to inform him that he does not need reminding.

Chan can feel it. He can physically feel the low thrumming of power under his skin whenever he touches Chan and up until now he cannot, for the life of him, get used to the feeling. Like holding cool yet heavy moonlight in his palms like it's a physical thing.

And yet, another image of Wonwoo forces its way in Chan's mind. An image from that one time he brought him up on the surface with the northern wind on full blow.

"You say that yet he falls weak with a little bit of snow." Chan says and Jihoon laughs.

"We all have our weaknesses. He's gotten used to moping by the river of fire, I'm afraid. And you." Jihoon adds and Chan laughs as well. 

"What exactly am I supposed to get out of this conversation?"

"Understand that you can never truly understand how Wonwoo thinks. That's coming from me and I have seen his dreams."

"I know that."

"No, you do not." Jihoon smiles at him.

"I am trying to tell you that there are layers to him and how he works. You tell him you need space and he would build a new palace for him to stay in because he thinks you meant you need literal time apart."

"Well, he did make this meadow by taking and planting flowers one by one." Chan admits and Jihoon laughs.

"Exactly. Be patient with him, yes, but also be open with what you need from him. Do so and you will find that he would not just try to do more for you. He will make it so he is sure that he has done more than you could ever imagine and he won't even see it as anything but doing what he should in the first place."

"You're saying that he'd find a way to steal the sun from the sky if I asked for it?"

"Knowing Wonwoo? He won't steal something because he does learn from his mistakes unlike most gods and he most probably do not want to offend another god. But he will make a hole on the surface of the earth so you'll get the sunlight you asked for."

"I have to admit I do see him doing all of that."

"I know. So enough with this brooding and go. Just go to him and coax him out of his own head and remind him that you only have but a day and a half here. And if that doesn't work I can give him nightmares even while he's awake. I'm getting pretty well verse in it, if I do say so myself."

"Thank you, Jihoon. I think I'll miss you the most after Wonwoo."

"Please make sure you tell Jeonghan this wonderful little fact. Please. It would mean so much to me if you did." Jihoon says and Chan gets up and smiles down at Jihoon.

"Let me keep dreaming of this place when I'm up there."

"I do not make your dreams, Chan, I curate them. Besides, it's not like your subconscious has anything else you want to dream of." Jihoon adds and Chan smiles at him before walking off into the castle.

Chan feels a little ashamed for being reprimanded about how he thinks of the one being he loves the most but he finds himself smiling as he hears his voice echoing throughout the castle.

Well, his and three other voices.

"I am telling you he is not worth it." Rhadamantus, the so-called ruler of Elysium and all of its champions, all but yells at his brothers across the dining table as the three judges stand around it instead of being in their usual positions in the hall of judgement.

"And I am telling you that our decisions are our own. So do not test me, brother." Minos says and he at least seems a lot calmer. He is just as loud but he does not look like he's about to relieve his brother of his head. Unlike Rhadamantus.

"That is enough. This is not helping our case at all and arguing would only make this take longer. What we need is-"

"What you need is to learn your manners. Howling about in the House of Hades, the castle of the ruler of the underworld, like children." Chan cuts Aeacus off, outraged at how they are behaving in his own castle. He sees Wonwoo look up at him, sitting at the head of the table surrounded by the brothers, and he only lets it get into his head a little when he sees a hint of a smile on Wonwoo's lips as he does.

"Our apologies, queen of the underworld. But it seems we are in quite a bind with a situation that has never happened before and we do not know what to do." Aeacus says and Chan is more intrigued now than annoyed so he walks up to them and stands by Wonwoo's chair.

"Tell me. Perhaps I could be of some help." Chan offered and they all nodded.

But Wonwoo raises his hand.

"As you three already know, the queen of the underworld, my queen, will be taking his leave tomorrow as he has his own duties to attend to. So let us not bother him with our own." Wonwoo says and the three brothers stare at him, unsure if they should protest or not, only to nod silently.

"Let the soul be put on hold by the fields of asphodels and I will give you an answer before tomorrow's sun has set." Wonwoo says and he gets up, takes Chan's hand in his, and brings it up to press his lips against his knuckles.

"I'll be busy for the rest of today and tomorrow." Wonwoo says and he drags Chan out of the dining hall and out of the castle all together.

Chan wants to laugh, wants to embed this moment in his brain so badly that it will be all that he can think of for the rest of his days. Wonwoo, choosing him over his own duties.

Seems as though Jihoon was right. The minute he thinks he knows something about Wonwoo he's proven to be wrong in the most satisfying way.

"Any particular reason you're dragging me towards my garden?"

"The reason being we need a few fruits to feast on for our picnic."

"I teach you the word picnic and what it means and you haven't stopped obsessing over having one."

"Because people have named the act of leisurely eating out in the open and the word sounds like a name you'd give to a thorny shrub that grows on a cliff. Picnic."

"Well, alright. Have you found this so called perfect spot already or am I to wait another hundred days for this because I have about a little over two dozen hours left." Chan says and Wonwoo opens the gates to the garden and lets Chan walk through first.

"I haven the perfect spot. Don't worry about that. But I will need you to bring about as much food as you can. Maybe food for about a month or so?"

"Are you that hungry?"

"Oh, I am starving. The only thing I've had in my mouth has been-" "Alright that is enough from you." Chan says and he stalks away, hiding away before Wonwoo could see the color on his cheeks, and he heads for the basket he has by his favourite pomegranate tree.

"Oh, this one's new? What is it?" Wonwoo steps towards the edge of the garden and Chan freezes as he picks a leaf out of the tree and chews it.

"Oh that is… unusually cool. Most of the herbs you grow bring fire to my mouth. What is this? It smells lovely."

"It's uh, right. It's called minthe, I believe." Chan says and he avoids Wonwoo's gaze at all cost. He busied himself with the fruits as Wonwoo kept talking.

"Mint? A new creation?" Wonwoo asks and Chan remembers how he even got this so-called  new creation.

"Of some sort."

"What was it made with?" Wonwoo asks and this time Chan turns to face him and he smiles.

"It was made from my unwavering and undying love for you." Chan says and Wonwoo smiles.

"That explains the cold feeling." Wonwoo jests and Chan laughs.

"I happen to like your kind of cold. When I hold your hand long enough I can feel it warm up slowly over time." Chan says and he focuses on picking as much fruits as he can.

His once little personal garden has bloomed into somewhat of an orchard that even his mother would be proud of. Once Chan found out that the fruits they eat have only been picked from a little unkempt forest of various trees, he was both saddened and outraged. He demanded Wonwoo to bring him there and it took a lot of control on his part not to lose his temper when he had asked for help on every single one that could and even a few souls from Elysium offered a hand in clearing it out enough for Wonwoo to make a path and Chan helped trees move little by little to align them perfectly and prevent their roots from colliding in on each other. Once they were finished, Wonwoo insisted on calling it Chan's garden but Chan politely declined.

And as much as he knows he has some hold over Wonwoo, only a few could win against Wonwoo when he's set his mind on certain things.

"I think this is enough for a month. Give or take a few days." Chan says, bringing the basket over to Wonwoo who was inspecting a few of Chan's new flowers.

"Wonderful." Wonwoo takes the basket from his hands and he turns and slips it into his shadow. The basket goes in like his shadow was a dark well of water and Chan stares as Wonwoo pulls his hand out without the basket.

"Have you said your goodbyes to everyone? I'm planning on keeping you to myself for the rest of your time left." Wonwoo says and Chan sighs.

One would think Chan would get used to Wonwoo's way with words by now but he's afraid even eons won't be enough for his heart to learn to get used to it.

"I have, save for Jeonghan and Jisoo. I haven't seen them today." Chan says and he sees a little hint of something in Wonwoo's eyes. Something flashes for a second before his expression is back to its usual smile.

"Jeonghan has Jisoo by the river Styx. Jisoo is a little out of his wits today, I'm afraid." Wonwoo says and Chan feels his chest double in weight.

"Another bad day?"

"This is… I do not think I have seen him as lost as he is today."

"That bad, huh?"

"Would it be too much of a trouble if I asked this one last favor of you?" Wonwoo asks and Chan feels his heart grow as Wonwoo looks at him as if Chan has ever said no to him and any of his requests.

"Does it matter if it is? I never say no to you." Chan says and Wonwoo takes his hand and leans down at the same time and surprises Chan with a kiss. He leads them towards the shadow of the nearest tree and Chan hides his smile on Wonwoo's chest as Wonwoo wraps his arms around him as they travel through shadow to get to Jeonghan and Jisoo.

Chan spends his time on the surface of the earth doing his duties as the goddess of spring. Well, most of it, at least. Because now that rumor has spread of their relationship, every single god who was not residing in Olympus, from minor gods who look over lakes and rivers to even the god of northern wind himself, has taken it upon themselves to dub Chan as the god who answers inquiries about the underworld.

"Does lord Hades actually eat souls?" "Do gods that reside in the underworld stay there by their own will?" "Does lord Hades use the bones of the undead as bed frames for his own bedroom?" legitimate questions like that. And Chan notices the stereotype his new family has been forced into.

Chan had to hold back his laughter when people assume the god of love is only serving time in the underworld out of respect for his duty wherein the Eros that Chan knows, the Jeonghan that he has grown to love, walks around the underworld with Chan and shows Chan where he can find love even there, in the darkest corners of the world. How he shows Chan that his love knows no bounds. How his duty may require him to be tethered to the underworld but it's his heart that longs to stay there.

Chan laughs at the people who think the god of sleep and dreams is dreary and gloomy when Chan finds Jihoon's humor to be the best in the underworld. How he can create hymns and stories from fragments he's collected from people's dreams. 

But the most questions he gets are about the two gods that most gods on the surface cannot, for the life of them, tell apart.

Chan can not count the number of times he's explained that Hades is the king of the underworld, the god that rules over that domain, while Thanatos, Jisoo, is the actual god of death. Once, he even received a rebuttal for speaking about them and he could not help but laugh at them for thinking Chan was merely speaking his opinion and not an actual fact. But when they asked what Thanatos even does in the underworld, Chan falls silent. He realises, then and there, that he hasn't spent much time with Jisoo as much as he has with the other gods. And that surprises Chan because he feels as if he's seen him as much as he's seen Jeonghan.

"I apologise. I, uh, I believe the fault is mine." Jisoo said when Chan confronts him about it and Chan laughs it off.

"How so?"

"Well, I figured it would be difficult for us to find common ground when you are the god that brings hope to people for a new tomorrow whilst I am the god that takes their tomorrow away from them." Jisoo says and Chan takes a deep breath and smiles.

"Doesn't that give us the biggest common ground?"

"Which would be, what?"

"Everything in between. The vast entirety between the beginning and the end." Chan says and Jisoo smiles.

"Jeonghan was right. Your heart is too big. Even for a god." Jisoo teases and Chan laughs as he tries to take his hand only for Joshua to flinch away. Then Chan remembers.

"Oh, I am truly sorry. It slipped my mind."

"No please. There's no need for an apology. I'm afraid you'd have to endure the lack of skinship if you are to be close with me."

"Oh however shall I survive." Chan says back and Jisoo laughs.

"It always kind of intrigued me how Jeonghan is one of the few gods you can touch. Wonwoo, I understand, but the god of love?"

"You've spent half your years on the surface, Chan. You of all people should know that love yields to no power. Not even death." Jisoo says and Chan smiles.

"I'm glad."

"Love will outlive even death, Chan. It's not exactly news to anyone." Jisoo explains and Chan laughs a little.

"Not that. I mean, I'm glad that within the few gods that you can lean on, Jeonghan is one of them. He is…" Chan looks over the river Styx to think of the best word that would fit his thoughts but his thoughts are interrupted by the image of Jeonghan standing over a sleeping Jihoon and twirling a flower over his nose which causes the god of sleep to wake up and to chase Jeonghan around.

"Yeah. I know." Jisoo says and Chan turns only to see Jisoo watching them as well.

They walked slowly as they approached Jeonghan and Jisoo, sitting on a huge boulder by the river Styx facing each other as they spoke in hushed voices. Jeonghan notices them first and he smiles before he whispers to Jisoo, kisses his cheek, and gets up to walk towards them.

"Another half of the year has gone by so fast." Jeonghan says and Chan hums. Jeonghan takes his hands in his and squeezes.

"I trust you'd watch over my garden for me while I'm away."

"I swear to do my best to keep Wonwoo out of it. I promise." Jeonghan says and they laugh as Wonwoo huffs.

"Would it be alright if I were to talk to him?"

"He's a little shaken from…" Jeonghan looks back at Jisoo and he sighs. He turns back to Chan and smiles.  "Although… I think he'd appreciate a few words from a friend, right about now." Jeonghan says and Chan smiles and nods. He makes his way to Jisoo and sits in front of him the same way Jeonghan was sitting earlier.

"Is it that time of the year already?" Jisoo says and he looks up from his knees and offers Chan a little smile.

"I'm afraid so."

"We'll miss you. Really."

"I'm still here for a day. Wonwoo wants me all for himself but if I am going to be honest with you here I'm getting a little tired of him." Chan says and Jisoo laughs, albeit weakly.

"You are free to talk to me. If you like." Chan starts and Jisoo drops his smile and looks down once again.

"I know how heavy it feels to confide to someone about the burdens you have in your heart but I also know how much lighter it would feel once you've shared about it. If you do not want to talk about it specifically then let your frustrations out on me." Chan offers and Jisoo takes a deep breath and closes his eyes.

"Do you remember our first conversation? When you asked me what exactly do I stand for. What the god of death does when people think all they need are the three fates and their trusty scissors?"

"Of course..."

"I didn't have an answer for you then but I think I do now."

"So what do you believe you stand for?"

"I believe I am the god people start to need when they stop needing gods like you." Jisoo says and Chan's heart aches at the weight of Jisoo's words. It doubles down on Chan because he knows Jisoo means every word of it.

"Jisoo."

"People need the fates to play out their lives and to snip their thread at the end of the line. They have no need for a god when it comes to their death, if you think about it. But- I cannot put to words how rotten it feels to only be needed when the one thing they yearn for from me is an end to it all. To hear my people call out to me only when they want…" Jisoo's voice is all but a whisper. A broken soft voice that shakes Chan from the inside. He… somehow he sounds cold. Like hearing his voice seeps the warmth from Chan's insides and draws them out to leave him with nothing but a chill up his spine.

And he wants nothing more than to hold him. To hold death and give him whatever comfort he can give. But Chan knows he can't.

"I do not think that death plays that little of a role in people's lives." Chan says and Jisoo takes in a deep breath and sighs. Chan pulls in all his tears because he cannot be the one breaking down when Jisoo needs him more.

"Then I am afraid you are too blinded by the light in your heart. I cannot expect you to understand."

"I have to admit that you are right, to an extent. I could never truly understand what you feel. I could not fully understand even if I had asked you to explain it to me in as much detail as you can. But I need you to believe that I do not need to in the first place. Because one does not need to understand what ails a friend for them to be there." Chan says and Chan places his palm on the boulder they're sitting on and he smiles as he feels it. He pulls at it, urging it to come out from the middle of the rock, and out from between them is a lone daisy emerging from a crack in the boulder.

"Thank you, Chan. I apologise if my farewell is not as lighthearted as I had wanted it to be."

"Oh please. As if you gods of the underworld could ever unlearn to be this dramatic. I will long for instances such as this when I am up there. Believe me. I do."

"I suppose you're right."

"I am. And it is more than alright because it is one of the things I love about our little family here." Chan says and he smiles when Jisoo finally gives him a whole genuine smile.

"Never forget to keep your heart up. You can lower your head when you cry but never drown your heart in today's sorrow."

"There will always be a new day. I know." Jisoo says and he smiles. Chan gets up from the boulder and as soon as he does Jeonghan comes rushing in to Jisoo's side and helps him up.

"We'll come visit sometime. And we'll see you off tomorrow as well." Jeonghan says and Chan nods.

"Rest easy tonight, yeah?" Wonwoo says to Jisoo and he nods.

"I will. What about-" "Tomorrow." Wonwoo cuts Jisoo off  with a softer voice and Jisoo nods.

"We will all come together and figure it out tomorrow. I promise." Wonwoo says and Jisoo nods. Wonwoo takes Chan's hand in his again and Chan waves at the other two as Wonwoo wraps one arm around his waist and slips them into the shadows again.

Chan wishes he could leave his heavy heart in the darkness when they emerged from the shadows but he could not. Chan looks around and finds them by the darker edge of the underworld, the ends that souls could only see if they were headed for Tartarus. He looks around even more and he finds that they are at the mouth of Tartarus. At the edge of possibly the worst place in the entire world. And yet he sees Wonwoo smiling and sees his fruits on the ground with Cerberus waiting patiently next to it.

"Please tell me I do not need to ask for you to explain why our picnic is right outside of Tartarus?"

"Well. Uhm. If I were to be technical, our picnic is somewhat… inside Tartarus." Wonwoo says and Chan stares as he smiles nervously at him.

"If this is your humor at work I'm afraid it is not as amusing as you may have hoped it would be."

"No humor. Please. Trust me. I…"

"You want me to spend my last day here, with you, eating pomegranate with the souls of the damned screaming by our sides?"

"No. I- This is… I told you there were two entrances for Tartarus. One that is meant for souls and… well…"

"The one that leads to the titans." Chan says out loud and he watches as Wonwoo nods and excitedly brings them over their baskets of fruits.

"This is that one."

"I'm afraid dining by the prison you gods built for your rather cannibalistic father is in no way a better romantic setting for a picnic than sitting by the screaming souls of the damned." Chan argues and Wonwoo lets out an exasperated sigh and he takes Chan's hands in his and forces him to look at him. 

"Have I ever let you down in all the years you have spent as my better half?" Wonwoo asks and Chan huffs. That is a very unfair question because Wonwoo knows the answer.

"One thing I learned from mortals is that there is always a first for everything."

"Trust me. I… I want to give you the one thing I could never give you before." Wonwoo says and Chan blinks.

"Wonwoo."

"Please. Not this again." Wonwoo says as if Chan is the one doing something ridiculous.

"I just- You have literally given me everything I have asked for. I do not need anything else. When are you going to put a stop this?" Chan asks, smiling, and Wonwoo downright looks upset to even be having this conversation right now.

"Not this one. I have- You have asked for this one thing even before the first time you had to leave me. And I have finally found a way to give it to you and you are making it seem like…" Wonwoo says and Chan feels his heart double in weight again.

"Oh, alright. I give in. If you make me cry again-" "You always cry when I give you my gifts." Wonwoo interjects and Chan huffs out a laugh.

"I do. And one would think you'd stop spoiling me so much so, in turn, you would stop making me cry."

"Right. I'm afraid that is not going to happen any time soon. Not in this century nor the next, at the very least." Wonwoo says and he smiles as he takes Chan's hand and leads him into a fair little cave opening.

Chan finds it his own fault for ever thinking Wonwoo could ever grow out of surprising him.

The mouth of the cave looks just as what one would think a cave looked like. He indulges Wonwoo, though, and follows him further and further in until Wonwoo takes a sharp turn and lifts his hand against the cave wall and the earth crumbles in his command and shows a quaint little burrow with blueish hellfire lighting up the entire place perched on torches around the room. He sees a little of their palace in here, almost like Wonwoo has taken bits and bits of the home Chan has gotten used to and has patched it all up to create this bit of home here. The little burrow he's made is decorated with chairs and hand sewn rugs that are similar to the ones in their room back in the palace and Chan even sees a couple of pots of plants above the fireplace. The ones that Chan knows do not need much care for them to grow. And Chan wonders what's so grand about giving him a little cave that is basically modelled like half of their home but the moment he sees Wonwoo watching his expression he makes sure not to be too honest with his face. 

"If you had wanted to hide away from them for a mere day I would say this a little too much." Chan offers and Wonwoo smiles even wider at him.

"This is not my gift. Well, it is. But it is only a part of it." Wonwoo says and he leads Chan to a chair made from twisting branches with a cushion made from soft woven vines. Chan notes that the seat is big enough for both of them but Wonwoo kneels in front of him as he takes his hand and smiles up at him.

"My gift to you, my love, is time." Wonwoo says and Chan blinks.

"Time."

"Yes. You see, the titans were thrown to tartarus to be locked up for all eternity. That is what he had told everyone we had done. But we all agreed that their crimes were worth serving an eternity twice over. That is why I created a different path to tartarus for the condemned souls apart from this one here. Because time here is bent to… serve a purpose."

"You… You manipulated time? I never knew you could even do that." Chan asks and Wonwoo all but shrugs it off.

"I did not. Nor did my brothers and sisters. What we did requires no actual time manipulation from us and all the effort from Kronos himself."

"How does one bend time against the titan that governs time?"

"In order to spend his time in captivity as quickly as possible, we knew he would bend time in one way or the other. So we syphoned that and redirected it around their prison. Now, the further you go in, the closer you get to the titans, the slower time will get for you but your perception of time changes along with it so it seems as though time goes by at a normal rate but in reality the time outside of you is slowed down."

"I don't… How is that… Wouldn't that mean that anyone who tries to set them free would have all the time in the world?" Chan says and Wonwoo laughs.

"Anyone who wanted to try to get to the titans couldn't even get past cerberus enough to reach me. I doubt that is any of our concern."

"So time here…" "Time here is faster. And in turn, time becomes slower." Wonwoo says and Chan blinks and frowns.

"Alright. Enough. I need you to tell me what this means exactly for us." Chan demands and Wonwoo holds in his laughter and clears his throat before smiling at Chan.

"Time here is slowed. We wanted the great titan Kronos that governs over time to be humiliated even more and be held prisoner by time. So every second out there, in our regular time, in the real world, he is serving a thousand years of his life in his prison. So his imprisonment for eternity-"

"Is served an eternity times over…" Chan says and Wonwoo smiles and nods.

And there it is again.

The cold shiver that runs up his spine when Chan is reminded of Wonwoo's true nature. Of his true power. He holds on to Chan's hand and Chan thinks of the hand holding his as someone who has faced the titan that governs over time, captured him, and ridiculed him by using his own power against him all while acting like it is nothing more than him fulfilling his duty.

"It took me a while to get the mechanics done. I had Cerberus to time me, which was as exhilarating as it sounds, and that's how I had found this perfect spot in the right distance from the cave's mouth and the right distance from the titans themselves."

"And you did all this?"

"It took me around a month to do this."

"When?" Chan asks and Wonwoo shrugs his shoulders and hums.

"I spend a day in here at random times. It would feel as though I was gone for mere minutes, really. And I had just finished last night."

"What?"

"It's my gift to you, Chan. A month's worth of time inside a single day." Wonwoo says. "Your mother said your time will be split, right? If I remember her exact words then she said you are to spend six months on the surface and then spend the rest of your time here. So now you will have half a year on the surface, half a year with our own family, and a month all for ourselves." Wonwoo says and Chan can feel his mind reeling from the concept of it all.

Wonwoo has created time. All for him.  

"A month?"

"Yes. Unless you want more, then I can-" Chan tackles Wonwoo to the ground, wrapping his arms around his neck as they fall to the ground.

"You've… Wonwoo, you've given me a thirteenth month all for myself."

"I told you. I'd give you all that you have ever asked for. If you asked me for the world I would find a way to bargain with Posiedon and Zeus for their parts and give you all three of them."

"You are giving me the worst kind of anxiety over using my own words against me. You do know that, right?" Chan says and Wonwoo smiles before kissing him.

"Wonwoo.."

"You're crying."

"I… gods Wonwoo. I do not know what kind of thanks is enough for something this grand." Chan could not hold back his tears even if he had wanted to and right now he honestly does not even want to.

"The only thanks I need from you is your permission to let myself spend all of your time here with you." Wonwoo says and Chan laughs.   

"I wouldn't want to spend a second more down here if I couldn't spend it with you." Chan finds himself saying and Wonwoo laughs as he pulls them both up and Wonwoo holds him as he tries to keep himself from crying even more.

The first thing Chan did after taking his time kissing Wonwoo was to ask questions. And he is quite glad he did because all these would've ended very badly if he hadn't.

"What do you mean you counted?" Chan asks again and Wonwoo blinks at him and shrugs his shoulders.

"I counted."

"Wonwoo… I asked how did you manage to keep time while in here." Chan asks again and Wonwoo just blinks at him and nods.

"So you… You sat here, counted the seconds of an entire twenty-four hours with your hands, and then came back out to Cerberus to ask him how long you were inside?"

"Exactly. Although it was a bit difficult given how Cerberus can only count to three but it all worked out well."

Chan cannot even begin to decide whether this is the most ridiculous thing he's ever heard of or the sweetest gesture he's ever heard of.

Chan figured Wonwoo did the best he did and he loves him all the more for it. So Chan thanks Wonwoo once again and asks if he has another pot for one more plant. Wonwoo didn't have one at hand but making one was no difficult feat for the ruler of the ground. He places his palm on the ground and lifts it up slowly to create a clay pot that hardens instantly and he does the same thing with his other hand and Chan watches as dirt burrows up from the hard ground of their little cave.

"What is it this time?" Wonwoo asks and Chan glances at Wonwoo to see the same kind of curiosity he always had when he asks Chan about his flowers. Chan fills the pot with dirt halfway and takes a seed from his pocket and drops it inside.

"I figured we'd need something to tell us the time." Chan says and when he covers the seed with more dirt and a bit of sand from the cave itself, to use the magic of the place along with his own, he closes his eyes and tries to focus on what his new flower will do.

"Can you name this one after me?" Wonwoo whispers in the middle of it all and Chan loses his focus and smiles. He shushes Wonwoo and he hears him laugh as the flower grows and Chan opens his eyes and sees yet another variation of a sunflower looking up at him.

"It's…"

"It's pretty. It looks like an actual sunflower."

"I've never… I never saw a plain one before." Wonwoo says and he lifts the pot and inspects the plant.

"Is it really this bright of a yellow?" Wonwoo asks and Chan laughs.

"Yes. You should see how bright they look when it's a field of sunflowers all lined up. You would love it." Chan says and Wonwoo smiles.

"I'm good with the hundreds of sunflowers you've cultivated all over the underworld. What does this one do?"

"Well, we need it to tell time. So it'll bloom at noon and close up at midnight. And with every passing day, a petal would fall from it as it blooms. So we will know when it's time for us to leave." Chan says and Wonwoo stares at the flower and he smiles.

"Won't it need sunlight?"

"All it'll need is the pot and the soil that it's in right now and it'll do its thing on its own."

"Alright." Wonwoo gets up, places the flower along with the other plants above the fireplace, and comes back to Chan to offer a hand for him to get up. He dusts off Chan's hands and he smiles down at him.

"So… What would the queen of the underworld want to do with his time now?" Wonwoo asks and Chan could not help the grin the spreads on his face.

"There is one thing I've always wanted to do with you."

"Which is?"

"We'll need to do it on the bed. I'm fine with doing it anywhere but I feel as though it'd be more dignified if we were to do it on a proper bed." Chan says and he quite enjoyed the color that spreads on Wonwoo's otherwise pale cheeks.

They spent around six days on the bed, sleeping in each other's arms. It seems so mundane and oh so simple but it's one thing Chan never got to do much of whenever he's in the underworld. He can't exactly blame those who lived in the underworld for having no concept of night and day. And he can't make them understand why he loved sleeping so much given that they are gods who have no need for sleep at all. But he loves it. He's so endeared by the thought of resting and doing nothing in such a comfortable position for a long period of time and the first time he had introduced the concept of sleeping daily to Wonwoo, he's a little surprised that Wonwoo found it a little silly. And yet here he is. Asleep in a much more comfortable robe with Chan in his arms who's in a not so comfortable position.

Wonwoo had pulled him in his arms, forcing his face to be pressed against the other's neck, as Wonwoo held him so tightly that he had thought Wonwoo was awake and just teasing. But he was not. He was still asleep and yet his breathing was erratic and his fingers were tightening on Chan's robes.

And then realisation hits Chan.

"Nightmares?"

"I… I had hoped you wouldn't have had to find this out about me."

"Find out what about you?"

"Find out the reason why the god of dreams has a place in the underworld..." Jihoon says and Chan blinks.

Nightmares are dreams born out of discord. Terrors that are fueled by negative emotions and they haunt heavy hearts with their own anxiety at a time when they should be finding peace in their sleep.

"You are one of the very few who have never had nightmares before so I had hoped you wouldn't have to find out."

"Why is it that you people try your best to hide parts of you from me?" Chan complains and Jihoon smiles.

"I think Jeonghan said it best when he said you are too blinded by the light of your heart. And some of us would like to keep it that way."

"But all of you are keeping parts of yourselves from me. It's not fair."

"Chan."

"You know I'm right. You all get to see all of me when I am here but you all still feel like hiding parts of yourselves from me."

"It is not as simple as that, Chan. It's not that we are hiding them from you. These are just parts of ourselves that we do not necessarily take pride in."

"But they are still part of you."

"Leave it to you to say such words and truly mean them." Jihoon says and Chan sighs, frustrated at how everybody thinks it's crazy of him to say what he truly feels.

"We don't say it to upset you, Chan. Not even to tease. It's just… You were sheltered most of your life. You live with green grass constantly under your feet so we know it's hard for you to understand when we show you the gravel we sleep in."

"Still. It's not-" it must seem repetitive of him to keep wording it out but it truly is not fair. To all of them.

"It's not. We know. But the world plays fair by being unfair to all. As you already know." Jihoon's smile is more teasing than sincere and it confuses Chan a little on what to feel.

"Not to all." Chan adds bitterly and Jihoon laughs.

"No. I guess not. But look at it this way." Jihoon takes Chan's hand and grasps it with both of his hands.

"Now that we have a place in your heart, you get to carry all of our pain with you. It makes it a little bit unfair to you, doesn't it?" Jihoon says and Chan forces a frown on his face as Jihoon laughs next to him on the very meadow Chan grew for him.

"Wonwoo." Chan tightens his arms around Wonwoo as well and he feels him flinch quite a bit as he wakes up. Then he settles back into his own skin and pulls Chan in even more for a much tighter hug.

"Is… Are you alright? What's-"

"I'm fine. I am. I-" Chan shushes him softly and Wonwoo lets out a deep breath.

"Sleeping is a lot more dangerous than I thought." Wonwoo teases and Chan laughs a little and hums.

"I keep thinking about what else we could do here with what is left of our time together and I can't think of anything grand we could do." Chan says and Wonwoo laughs a little at his words and Chan pulls away to look up at Wonwoo.

"We do not need anything grand to do, my love. This time is yours. Yours to do any and every single thing you wish to do." Wonwoo reminds him and Chan sighs.

"We can sleep some more later on. And uhm…"

"What?"

"Would it be too much to ask for more rooms?"

"I suppose it's alright. What are the rooms for?" Wonwoo asks and Chan tries to think of any and every thing he had ever wanted to do in the underworld if they had more time.

The very first room is their very own garden for plants that need no sun more water. Wonwoo voices out how he never knew there were a lot of plants such as these one and Chan confesses to creating more and more of them for the underworld. And right here would be the perfect place to experiment and cultivate them into perfection. 

Chan also believes the plants would be enough to feed Wonwoo's curiosity. Feed it enough to occupy his mind and make him truly forget the worries he's trying to hide from Chan.

Wonwoo hovers behind him, in front of him, all around him, as he creates plant after plant that needs darkness and the lack of warmth and Wonwoo smiles so brightly as he touches the blooming deep purple lily and it blooms to completion in his hands. His laugh was as bright as his smile that Chan was worried it would kill the newborn plant that needs darkness.

By the time they had finished their new little garden, Chan walks out into their living room and sees the sunflower already missing quite a number of petals. He walks up to it, gathers the petals all around its pot and even the two that fell on the dirt inside of the pot, and he counts six of them. He feels a soft chill on his back and a second later he feels Wonwoo's arms around him.

"It has already been almost a week…"

"Good thing you decided to create a way to tell time. It somehow felt longer than that and at the same time, shorter." Wonwoo says and Chan sighs.

"Why is time still moving so fast? Can you do something about it? Anything?"

"Chan. Time is not moving any faster than it should."

"It is! It is making a fool out of us because we are trying to outsmart it! It's-"

"Chan."

"It's not fair!"

"Calm down, my love."

"We were supposed to have more time here. You gave me more time and yet it's still fleeting past by us. I should have a say on how fast or slow it goes! It is time given to me! It's not fair!" Wonwoo takes his hands in his and squeezes.

"Do you feel that?" Chan huffs, fighting back the urge to let his tears fall because he does not want to make it look like he's throwing a tantrum even more than he already is.

"That is one more moment of us together that we are stealing from time." Wonwoo says. Chan bites his lips and lets Wonwoo pull him in for a hug.

"And this is yet another hug we're stealing from time." Wonwoo adds and Chan hides his face on Wonwoo's robes.

Then Wonwoo pulls back a little, tilts Chan's face up to smile down on him, and he kisses him. "And another kiss we get to steal from time." Wonwoo says against his lips and Chan can't help the frown still on his face when Wonwoo hugs him again.

"Maybe it's time's way of retaliating." Wonwoo says and Chan groans.

"Whatever could that possibly mean?"

"Well… I got you for another number of days and maybe time felt cheated." Wonwoo says and Chan sighs.

"That is idiotic."

"Is it? It wouldn't be the first to be jealous that I get to have you for myself." Wonwoo says and Chan hits his arm.

"Stop it."

"It's true." Wonwoo adds and Chan feels more embarrassed than anything.

"I'm sorry. For complaining."

"Don't be. If anything, I feel honoured that you love me so much that you would be this desperate for more time with me. Given how we already are on stolen time as it is." Wonwoo adds and Chan hits his arm again but this time he follows it up with a kiss on Wonwoo's cheek.

They spent quite a while just talking. Chan finds that given all the time they spent together in the many years that they have been together they never really spend much of that time just talking. Given the circumstances, Chan felt as though talking about the time they were apart would be a waste of their time spent together. So when they talk, they talk about plans and schedules and what to do and where to go and who to talk to. But never did they talk about this.

Wonwoo feels more and more pressure with every passing day given how congested the underworld has become. Chan's plans and changes during his first time here was already such a big help in helping the souls navigate their way around the underworld but it was still not enough for the number of souls that resides in the underworld today.

"I feel a little out of my wits most days. Like a blind man leading the blind." Wonwoo says. They're both back in their bed but this time it's just Wonwoo sitting in the middle of it with his back to the wall as Chan lies down with his head on Wonwoo's lap. 

"I'm sure it's not as bad as it is, Wonwoo."

"Oh, it is. Trust me. It's only gotten worse. There are times when the gods feel restless and they couldn't find it in themselves to confide in me. And the souls are getting more and more… complicated." Wonwoo says and Chan notices something heavier there that Wonwoo probably doesn't want him to notice.

"You'll figure it out. You've always figured things out and it always works out in the end. It's just that there will be times where the right decisions are the ones that are harder to make." Chan says and Wonwoo smiles down at him and runs his fingers through his hair.

"You taught me that. Remember?" Chan says and Wonwoo hums.

"Well ,let it be known that I am a hypocrite because I can't, for the life of me, make a decision that is even remotely inconvenient for myself." Wonwoo says and Chan laughs a little.

"I know you'll do the right thing, Wonwoo. It's who you are. I'd even go so far as to call it your fatal flaw." Chan admits and now it's Wonwoo who laughs.

"Is that so? Well, color me flattered."

"I mean it. I don't know a single other god who would sacrifice as much as you would, as much as you already have, out of duty. And I'm not speaking out of love but out of respect."

"Do you really think so highly of me?" Wonwoo asks, as if he really could not believe Chan, so Chan sits up and levels his eyes with his.

"Zeus may own the skies and Poseidon may rule the seas, but you? You serve the underworld, Wonwoo. You may wear the crown and the title of king that comes along with it but you work twice as much as any god down here. And I should detest you for not paying me more attention when our time together is timed but my own heart won't even let me feel anything but fondness and adoration for you when you put your people first. Even before yourself." Chan watches a shy smile bloom on Wonwoo's face and he crawls closer and leans on him, wrapping his arms around Wonwoo's left hand as Wonwoo leans in to place a kiss on his hair.

Moments together, time they have spent like this, all tangle up to form hours. And those hours turn to more hours until another petal falls from their very own sunflower, telling them that a day has already passed by them once again. And then more and more moments together links up, reading stolen and borrowed books on the floor with their fireplace burning a bright blue hellfire, sitting on a chair together that's too big for just one person but a tight fit for two that they end up pressed together even more than usual, and lying together and doing nothing for hours but talk and kiss and hold each other.

And all of it is just what Chan wanted. Just what he needed. And yet it never seems to be enough for his hungry heart.

Especially not when he can feel it. Can feel Wonwoo hold his breath, somehow. Like he's physically holding himself up at times when he goes quiet and Chan calls out to him.

And as much as Chan does not want to pry and coerce Wonwoo to open up before he feels like opening up to him he can't stand one more day of enjoying more time with Wonwoo if Wonwoo can't find the same happiness he does in their time together.

"Wonwoo." Chan calls out and Wonwoo tightens his hold of Chan.

"Hmm?"

"I know you might not want to, but you can tell me about it."

"About what?"

"About the soul. The one that's got the three judges sniffling by your feet. The one that has Jisoo shaken that even Jeonghan can't calm him down. The one that has half of your mind occupied all this time."

"It's nothing you should worry about, Chan. Honestly."

"Was your nightmare about it?" Chan asks and Wonwoo sighs and keeps silent.

It's another flaw in Wonwoo's design. He can't bear the feeling of being lied to so he swore never to lie. And when circumstances urges him to tell the truth or be a burden, he'd rather keep quiet.

"Tell me."

"We have a few days left in here, Chan. I do not want to taint what time we have left in here by burdening you with my thoughts."

"You won't be. And even if you are then I'll only be doing what should be doing as your queen. The burden of your heart is also mine to carry, Wonwoo." Chan says and Wonwoo lets out a frustrated sigh.

"You're making it very hard for me to keep being miserable on my own."

"Your problems are my own. Don't think of it as giving me the weight of your problems but think of it as me carrying that weight along with you." Chan says and Wonwoo lets out a heavy sigh and takes Chan's hand to lead him back to their bed.     

And share his problem, he does. 

And it was a problem that Chan could not have prepared for even if he knew how to.

For the first time in all of eternity, the three brothers could not pass judgement on a soul.

It might seem strange, given their number, but it was never an impossible feat. Most of the time, the votes are sort of weighted on whether the soul has done good or bad. Most of the time it's two against one. Two votes on a good person good to Elysium and one vote to the fields of asphodel because one judge deems their life accomplishments as not so grand that they would deserve passage through the gates of Elysium. Or two votes to a soul going to Tartarus for their crimes while one vote weighs in towards the middle for they feel that they have served their time already in their days alive and that they do not need more punishment in the afterlife. And sometimes it is the reverse of those instances. A good person only getting one vote to Elysuim and a bad person getting only one vote to Tartarus.

But never in all the years have the three brothers voted for a soul to go to Elysium, the fields of asphodel, and Tartarus.

The soul they are judging is of a man. Or rather, a boy in the middle of becoming a man. He had done no out of the ordinary feats of glory that could put him on the news or on the gossip of the wind and trees and he also had done no crimes nor anything even a little heinous to others. He has lived his life up to that point as a somebody and a nobody at the same time. He has lived like that up to the point where he took his own life.

The gods, the ones Chan have known growing up, look down on souls who took their own life. But probably not for the same reason people will tell. Not for the same reason people look down on them, too. People would say that the gods are angry that a soul does not appreciate the gifts every god has made for humans to enjoy and in a way, that should make sense. But in all honesty, gods are angry because it is one act where they feel powerless over humans. Chan detested Zeus for saying that when he did and he made sure he knew how Chan felt that day.

Some would think that taking one's life is an immediate ticket to Tartarus but Chan is glad that there are others gods who do not agree with that.

Souls are judged on the way they died, yes, but not as heavily as how they are judged for the way they lived. "It's just like you said, my love. That time when I showed you the fields of asphodel for the very first time. That souls need that time. Time to be nothing before they can become something again." Wonwoo adds and Chan smiles.

Chan believes that the act should be frowned upon. That it is wrong to play the role of the three fates on your own and take one's own life.

He can not even begin to describe the rotten feeling it brings him when he thinks of people who are alive and breathing yet already possess tortured and lost souls. As much as he wants to defend them for only doing what they did out of pain and loss he also does not want to say that it should be done. He does not want to say that, "If you are tired, then choose to rest." That's the opposite of what his entire being represents.

Once he had been given the mantle of the goddess of spring, Chan wanted it to mean something more. He wanted spring to mean more than just the earth waking and pretty flowers blooming. He wanted spring to become something people look forward to. A new beginning, a beacon of hope and a new dawn that could rival the brightest of days. Chan wanted spring to become a symbol that would make people look forward to a new day. He wants people to think that when they are tired, they are allowed to rest with the thought of starting a new day stronger.

Because there are people who do not want more days. There are people who do not wish to keep the life they are given and Chan knows that.

As gods, they hear the prayers uttered to them by their people. Can feel their love and adoration and their sacrifices, no matter how grand or how small, all comes to them and revitalises them the way nothing else could. Chan watches as the love of his life gets the most heart wrenching prayers one could ever have and he regrets not listening to Wonwoo when he told him it's best not to let Chan hear them.

"These people are… You have to understand that they are only lost. They are! They- They are only confused, disoriented from the path their lives should be taking and they feel immense pressure from it. They feel the worst kind of loss because they can feel the very moment when they lose themselves and it breaks their souls. And they only pray for their lives to end so they do not carry that burden, that weight, on their shoulders when they pass." Wonwoo explains to him. Chan's heart breaks as Wonwoo defends them. As he stumbles on his own words just so Chan wouldn't think less of people like them.

Chan breaks even more when he realises that Wonwoo holds such love for these souls because he, too, once was like them. Lost. Someone who thinks they are broken beyond repair when all they are disoriented.

"This man, the soul. How come… how come the three judges are so divided on where to put him?" Chan asks and Wonwoo takes a deep breath and collects himself before answering.

"Because they are all looking at every single thing that makes up his life in very different ways." Wonwoo explains and Chan, for the first time in a long while, feels such a heavy heart even with Wonwoo's arms around him.

"Aeacus, fair as he is, had voted for him to be sent to the fields of asphodel. For his soul to rest for as long as it wants and for him to drink from the river lethe and forget all that has weighed heavily on his heart." Wonwoo says and Chan blinks.

"So someone between Rhadamantus and Minos had voted for him to go to Elysium?"

"It may seem odd but I feel as though Rhadamantus has gotten too used to steeling his heart in judging and Minos' heart may have started to thaw from all the years he's spent here." Wonwoo says and Chan finally catches on.

"Rhadamantus voted for him to be thrown into Tartarus. For playing god and taking his own life. He says even an act of heroism that could rival Hercules' could not outweigh his last act and would never warrant his passage to Elysium."

"And Minos thinks he deserves it?"

"Minos has… He believed in a fourth option."

"A fourth?"

"The occupants of Elysium have the choice to either stay here and bask in their glory or be reborn."

"Right."

"Well, Minos believes that the soul should be sent to Elysium but only if the soul is forced to be reborn again. To start over without reaping the amenities that Elysuim has promised. His reasoning comes from the fact that the soul reached judgement. Which meant that he had the coin needed for Charon's ferry."

A coin for Charon's ferry could only mean one thing.

"Which means he had a respectable burial." Chan adds and Wonwoo nods.

"And if his family still treated him with love and respect after what he has done then that must mean something. That must amount to something." Wonwoo says and Chan hums.

"I… I never thought Minos would become so… fair."

"Out of the three, he's the only one who serves justices because he made so many mistakes. His brothers were lawful and fair all their lives which leads to their position here but Minos becoming a judge is not because he was fair when he was alive. It's because of all the mistakes he made in his life that will teach him to be fair."

"I… I hope you resolve that soon. I do not wish to color your own decisions but I will say that I know you will be just and firm." Chan says and Wonwoo smiles and hums.

"And I hope that once you are back to doing what you do best, you inspire more and more people to look forward to tomorrow. The same way you have inspired me to." Wonwoo says and Chan smiles at him and kisses his forehead.

Wonwoo apologises. Over and over again. He feels terrible for spoiling one of their last nights together and Chan only laughs because it's only one night of the entire month that Wonwoo has created out of thin air for him. But he knows Wonwoo's far too tender for such humor right at this moment so Chan held him in their bed and told them that it's nothing he should be thinking about too much. "I have no problem in carrying the burdens in your heart. What's yours is mine, remember?" Chan says and Wonwoo hums and nods.

But Wonwoo's words stay with Chan like they always do. But this time it weighs even more than usual. It stays with him even as the last hours of their time here finally passes them by and even after Wonwoo's closed off their little burrow, walking hand in hand with each other as they come out of the tunnel and they are greeted with Cerberus waiting patiently for them.

You inspire more and more people to look forward to tomorrow

"Anything wrong?" Wonwoo asks and Chan smiles up at him and shakes his head.

The same way you have inspired me to

"Actually. If it's alright, I'd like to have a talk with Jisoo one last time." Chan says and Wonwoo smiles softly at him and nods. Then he turns to Cerberus and kneels.

"Can you lead us to where Jisoo is? You remember Thanatos?" Wonwoo asks the hellhound and Cerberus growls a little and lifts all three of its snouts and circles them. Then it barks and dives into its own shadow. Wonwoo takes Chan's hand and they do the same.

They emerge behind the tree by the river Styx and Jeonghan standing by Jisoo's side as he stays seated on the boulder he's grown comfortable in. And he tries to think of when he last saw a god staying on top of a slab of rock and the cold hand on his lower back, urging him to walk forward, reminds him of who it is exactly.

And he remembers why exactly Wonwoo felt that cold comfort of staying on top of a series of stones and boulders and Chan feels a sad little smile come up his face.

"Wonwoo. Chan. A final goodbye?" Jeonghan says and Chan smiles and reaches for his hand.

"I'm just about to go. Would it be alright if you guys give Jisoo and I a moment? I won't be long." Chan says and the two of them watch Chan with unsure faces but Chan pushes them away, urging them to walk on a little to give them some space, and Chan smiles at them as they look back. Chan turns back to Jisoo still sitting on his boulder of solitude and he walks up in front of him and takes a deep breath.

"Stand up." Chan says and Jisoo looks up at him with sad and confused eyes to which Chan smiles back to.

"Stand up. Come on." Chan says and Jisoo laughs a little, surprised and still very much confused, but groggily gets up to his feet.

"I believe I don't need my feet under me when you give me yet another lovely speech about keeping my head up and all that." Jisoo says with humor even though it was said with a sad smile. Chan hums and nods and he smiles up at him.

"You are right. I wouldn't need you upright like this for that. But I do need you to be standing up for me to do this." Chan says and he takes two steps forward with his arms open and wraps Jisoo in a hug.

He hears a panicked call of his name from the two gods a distance from them and an even more concerned call for his name from Jisoo himself as he freezes with his arms away from Chan as if giving in to the hug would do him more harm.

"This is the first time an embrace from me had been so openly rejected." Chan says and Jisoo slowly gives in and laughs as he reciprocates Chan's embrace.

"Chan, how…" Jeonghan is by their side as he huffs out his words then laughs.

"You told me that I am the god that brings hope to people for a better tomorrow." Chan says, pulling away from the hug a little to see Jisoo's smiling face.

"And you once said that love that is born out of hope can reach even the darkest depths of the underworld." Chan said to Jeonghan and he reaches his hand out to him and squeezes.

"And I figured that if I could take the broody god that rules the underworld and make him take an interest in gardening, then I might know a thing or two about breaking some other godly boundaries." Chan says and he smiles at Wonwoo.

Chan lets go of Jeonghan's hand and wraps his arms around Jisoo once more. His coldness reminds Chan of Wonwoo's but it’s a chill that is so unsettlingly constant that Chan feels as though he could not get used to it no matter how many times they touch. Jisoo starts to tear up in the middle of laughing and he tightens his arms around Chan as well. And Chan feels warm.

"It's not that you cannot kill hope. You can. I've seen it happen over and over again. But that is exactly what hope does." Chan says and he laughs. 

"The moment you feel as though hope has died, it comes back to you eventually. It may not always be there but it will always come like the seasons that come and go." Chan says and Jisoo cries even more in his arms. He falls to his knees and Chan catches him and wraps his arms around his shoulder as Jisoo hides his face on Chan's chest.

It's such a confusing feeling, to find comfort in embracing death. Chan is reminded of Wonwoo's story of a woman who's been told would die as a new born and yet lived long enough to bear children and to live a happy and satisfied life with the love of her life that she has no qualms in being welcomed by the gates of hell. And yet, Chan can understand it. Understand how one could understand why death has to come.

"Chan." Jeonghan whispers and Chan pulls back as well as Jisoo and yet he finds himself stuck where he stands for roots have grown around his ankles and up his body to wrap around his temple. Chan watches as the three of them watch him and he feels the warmth that was on his chest spreading though his body along with the vines that find themselves winding up around his robes.

Wonwoo takes a step forward, takes Chan's hand as the vines grow past his wrist and down to his fingers and the vine that runs down his middle finger extends to Wonwoo's own hand and stops as it wraps around his wrist. Wonwoo helps Chan back up on his feet and Chan feels a heavy weight on his head settle as he does.

"Persephone. The goddess of spring and new beginnings. The queen of the underworld. " Wonwoo says and he smiles.

"The embodiment of hope that could never truly die." Jisoo adds and Chan finally feels the vines let up on their hold on him and he stumbles as little as he looks around himself to find the vines darken as they dried up and they hardened into place. Dark and dead vines hug his robes that accent his otherwise light pink robes that Wonwoo had once compared to the brightest of rose quartz that Wonwoo could unearth from the depths of the earth.

"I've always known you were more. That love in your heart that I once said blinded you actually just shows you the world in such a pretty light. It makes you look at people and see the seed of good in them just like how you saw the underworld and thought that we were more than we are." Jeonghan comes to hug him and Chan laughs as he picks him up and twirls him.

"I've known you were special the moment I first laid my eyes on you." Wonwoo says and he takes a look at Chan and his smile falters a little.

"Wonwoo."

"I just… It looks as though we've tainted you with our-" "Oh stop it. Honestly." Chan cuts him off and Wonwoo frowns.

"I've already had my reservations with how much the underworld has affected you over the years and this is just blatant proof of that. They're dead vines, Chan."

"You don't think I look pretty with a crown roses and thorns and vines on my robes?"

"You know I think you look pretty in anything. But what will your people think when they see you like this?"

"If that's what you think then why should the opinions of anyone else matter?"

"People will talk. They will know you're the queen of the underworld even when you're on the surface." Wonwoo says and Chan laughs.

"Good." Chan answers and he watches  as a smile blooms on Wonwoo's face once more.

"I do not find any shame in being the queen of the underworld, my love, I take pride in it. Your people seem to respect me enough to know that power comes with my title so I don't know why you seem to be having trouble in doing so." Chan says and Wonwoo sighs.

"There are times when you terrify me. Are you aware of that?" Wonwoo asks and Chan hums.

"I am. I believe it's a display of good survival instincts on your part." Chan says and he smiles.

Before they could spend more time together, Chan asked for one last favor from Wonwoo.

A chance. A bit of time with the soul.

"Hello." Chan starts and the soul looks up at him. He reminds Chan of the souls behind him, the souls in the fields of Asphodels. The way their gazes hold no weight at all.

"Are they… Do they know of a way to be rid of me?"

"That's not their work, I'm afraid." Chan says and he sits on the ground in front of the man and he follows, sitting on the ground with his eyes still cast downwards.

"If I may, could I ask for your name?" Chan asks and the man folds in on himself. Wonwoo's words ring in his head, how the soul is not yet a man but a little too old to still be considered a boy.

"What about your duties? Your work?"

"I am- I was a writer."

"I happen to think I am quite well read so perhaps I've read some of your work."

"It is not- my work was not that known. Not enough to give me a name for myself."

"Names are overrated. Take it from a goddess who has several names." Chan says and that's when the soul looks up at him. And in a way, Chan feels caught off guard. His gaze weighs more than recognition but there's questions in his eyes. So many questions that Chan wouldn't find the words to answer with even if he could list them all out.

"You're her, aren't you? The queen of the underworld. Goddess of spring."

"That's one of my many names, yes."

"Well, now you're one of the many names of gods and goddesses that I will have to apologise to."

"The sin you committed is more of a sin to yourself than it is to any god you know of." Chan says and the soul smiles. The cold and sad smile he thought he had long forgotten years ago. The kind of smile he'd see on Wonwoo when he speaks of his happiness as if it was as far as the distance between the sun and the moon. 

"Be that as it may, I feel as though I have failed you the most."

"Because you lost hope?"

"Because I couldn't find it."

"Hope is more than that. And it's never your fault for losing hope. Please understand."

"Words of comfort do not hold the same sentiment for one that is alive and one that is already but a consciousness without a body." The soul speaks with words like a true writer. The way he weaves words together and stitches a picture.

Chan reaches for his hand and Chan looks down at his calloused fingers.

"I am not like you with your words. I do not wield them to create nor do they have a grand purpose. I am simply saying that I am a goddess but I am far from perfect. I am given the mantle of being the embodiment of hope and new beginnings but I cannot fulfil my task all the time. I am telling you that when you feel like you need to be more, that you find yourself at a loss and feeling so broken and blinded in what you are to be in your life, then you are just feeling what it means to be alive." Chan feels his heart swell in his chest as tears start to fall on their hands. The soul weeps quietly and Chan wills the reeds around them to grow over their head and hide them from the world.

Chan gets up and helps the soul up to his feet and they walk towards Wonwoo who's waiting for them by the castle gates. "I want to cast my own vote. On where he should go." Wonwoo stares at him, calculating, and he breaks into a smile. "Of course. And I shall relay your vote onto the three." Wonwoo says and Chan smiles. They leave the soul to the three judges and Chan waves one final goodbye to them and he finds the soul smiling at him before bowing his head to him.  

They have a few more moments left so Chan spends that talking with Jisoo, holding his hand as they do so. He proves to them with every passing second that hope is far more stronger than death. Death may be a continuous cycle but hope is far more everlasting than death could ever be. They talk about when Jisoo and Jeonghan could visit him on the surface and Chan feels such warmth at the thought of tomorrow and what it could bring him. Jihoon catches them right before they have to leave and he watches as his family here sends him off with goodbyes that are anything but sad.

"That is because of you." Wonwoo says as he guides him up the path made only for Chan to come and go from the surface.

"What is?"

"A goodbye filled not with sorrows but with something brighter."

"How I could I have possibly done that?"

"If I were to answer that based on my own personal thoughts, then I'd have to say that it is simply in your nature. To make people look forward. To make even gods see the good in saying goodbye because it means there will be a tomorrow where we could say hello once again." Wonwoo says and Chan blinks back his own tears at the sudden gentleness in Wonwoo's words and he looks away.

They reach the surface and come out in a cave-like opening on top of a hill. The hill was surrounded by a field of flowers covered in a thin sheet of snow that slowly melts as Chan emerges from the mouth of the cave. Chan couldn't help but tighten his hold of Wonwoo's hand as he stepped forward and Wonwoo stood still.

"Just one more second." Chan says and Wonwoo laughs at him. Chan bites his lips to keep himself from fully crying and Wonwoo pulls him backwards to wrap his arms around him from behind him.

"You always do this." Wonwoo says and Chan huffs out.

"I have every right to do this."

"You have already gotten a month more than what we used to have, Chan. You cannot be this greedy." Wonwoo teases and he pulls away only to turn Chan around and hold his face in his hands.

"You act as if I do not come to see you as often as I like." Wonwoo adds and Chan could not help but frown.

"Because you do not come to see me as often as I like." Chan quips and Wonwoo laughs.

"Your mother would call that a breach of our agreement, my love. Come now. You have your duties up here as I do down there."

"Fine." Chan huffs out and Wonwoo hums.

"I love you. With all that I have and more." Wonwoo says and Chan smiles through his tears and leans up to kiss Wonwoo.

"And I love you. More than I could ever put into words." Chan says and Wonwoo smiles at him as they both take one step backwards. Chan watches as the cave slowly crumbles close and he's left with nothing but the sunset and the field of sunflowers in full bloom by the foot of the hill.

Chan walks down the path and he watches as the sunflowers all try to reach for the last bit of sunlight they could reach as the sun fully hides away from sight. He thinks to himself how cruel it is on his part to always do this to them. To emerge from the underworld to give them the chance to bloom only for the sun to set not even an hour later. So Chan stood still, in a field of sunflowers desperately crying and calling for the sun to come back, and Chan hears the same cry of a soul that is still alive but longing for death. Chan walks up to the closest stalk to his right and he holds its flower in his palm and does the same for the flower next to it.

These people are… You have to understand that they are only lost.

Chan remembers now. Why Wonwoo seemed to remind Chan of a sunflower given that Wonwoo probably hasn't seen much of the sun to begin with. It was this. Their hidden pain that no one seems to ever notice aside form Chan. Not even the goddess of harvest could feel their pain and Chan felt tremendous pain from finding out that they've had this pain with them since the moment they bloom for the first time.

They are only confused, disoriented from the path their lives should be taking and they feel immense pressure from it. They feel the worst kind of loss because they can feel the moment when they lose themselves.

People call sunflowers pretty and hold them up as a symbol of love for their devotion to the sun. But they do not hear them at night. They do not hear the screams of their anguish and their desperate need for the sun to come back. They don't see how sunflowers literally tore themselves apart at night and only bloom to their prestigious image when the sun is there. No one but Chan knows that Sunflowers are as broken as they are in love.

"Shh. It'll be fine." Chan turns the sunflowers and forces their heads down, to stop them from desperately calling out to a sun that will not bend to their needs. Chan forces the sunflowers to see each other. He pushes them, breaks them a little because they are stubborn and are truly in love with the sun that all they ever knew was to look up at the sky and wait for it to return. But now, they don't need to wait in pain.

Now, they can have each other when love leaves their sight.

Chan watches as the two in his palms seem to look at the other like they're the sun. They find peace in knowing that they might not have the sun right now but they have something better than having nothing.

They have each other.

Chan smiles as he steps away from the two only to see the rest of the sunflowers in the field to follow suit and turn to each other. Chan intended to help, yes, but he's overwhelmed by the image of all the flowers doing the same almost instantly. Chan watches, dumbfounded, as sunflowers bloom so brightly under the starlight for the very first time.

Legend has it that this is the first time Sunflowers turn to each other when they could not find the sun but not a single one will remember that the one who taught sunflowers to do so was a goddess that was happy and broken and hopeful at the same time. Legends will forget the power of inspiration and hope Persephone holds in just the palm of her hands but every sunflower remembers. They remember a tear streaked face smiling up at them, holding them so gently that their fingertips felt more like a warm summer breeze than anything. They remember the help they received being forced on them because helping others will not always be pretty. Sometimes, help has to be forced on those we want to help. Sometimes, to help a tree to grow properly, you will have to break a few branches. Every single sunflower that blooms and will bloom will always remember that the sun sets only to rise once again.

Every sunflower will know that even when darkness surrounds them and it seems as though their sun is forever gone, tomorrow will come to them. It will always come as long as you hold onto hope.

And if hope is out of reach, then we hold onto each other and bloom. It's as simple as that.