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1. Izuku.
For his third year of university, Izuku lives with two classmates in an off-campus apartment. On an afternoon when both of his roommates are stuck in a three-hour physics lab, he brings Shouto over to visit.
Shouto asks him all of the trivial questions he's too embarrassed to ask his family: "What is this box?" (a microwave) and "What are those things on your fridge?" (magnets) and "Why do the magnets stick to the refrigerator?" ("Oh, um... that's a good question! I'm not sure, but I can look into it...")
Izuku shows him how to turn lights on and off, how to use the microwave, and all of the other things he never learned while growing up in a cabin with no electricity, in the middle of a forest. Shouto is somewhat ashamed that he knows so little about the human world, but Izuku is a gentle and patient teacher.
Before his roommates return, Izuku helps Shouto figure out his cell phone, an older model handed down from Natsuo. His family's phone numbers are already pre-programmed, but Izuku adds his own and shows him how to start calls and respond to text messages. When he successfully sends a text saying hello this is shouto, Izuku beams.
When Shouto asks Izuku about the other icons on the phone screen, he says that they're mostly just games that Natsuo had previously downloaded. Shouto isn't particularly interested in playing any of them, but he doesn't delete them either, just in case.
A couple of weeks later, Shouto uses his phone to sneak a photo of Izuku mid-conversation (Natsuo had taught him how to use the camera app). His smile feels like sunlight.
Natsuo helps him set the picture as his lock-screen wallpaper.
2. Mother.
Shouto keeps his concealment spell on as much as possible, even in his family's apartment.
Out in public spaces, it's a given to keep his ears and tail hidden. However, the day he reunited with his family, Shouto had kept the illusion going even after entering their home, and no one had commented on it one way or the other. He figures everyone would probably be more comfortable if he kept his appearance as human-like as possible, so he keeps the concealment in place. The only time the spell fades is when he's asleep.
The Himuras live in a three-bedroom apartment, so Shouto sleeps on a spare futon in the living room. A few weeks after moving in, Shouto wakes up in the middle of the night and goes to get a glass of water. He forgets to put the concealment spell back on.
The lights in the kitchen are dimly lit; his mother is making tea by the counter, with the electric kettle that Izuku had told him about. As Shouto approaches, his ears cast two pointed shadows on the kitchen cupboards.
His mother startles and whirls in place, instinctive alarm carved into her face. The kettle burbles quietly as the water comes to a boil; wisps of steam float from the kettle spout.
Shouto flinches hard, falling back into the bottom cabinets. He ducks his head in between his knees, crouching to make his body occupy as little space as possible.
For a long moment, the only sounds in the kitchen are Shouto's heavy breaths and the electric kettle automatically switching itself off. Then his mother slowly steps forward and sits on the floor across from him.
“Shouto, darling, can you look at me?” Human speech still evades him, but he forces his eyes upward. Now, her expression only reads as motherly concern. “You’re okay. You don’t need to hide yourself.”
Shouto knows she’s referring to his ears and tail, but he can’t bring himself to drop the concealment. When his words return, he gasps, “But they scared you... I scared you-”
“No, Shouto, I promise. I’m not afraid of you.”
“Are you still afraid of him?”
“I... don’t think so. Not anymore. But the body takes longer to forget.”
They both sit on the floor for a good while, until Shouto's body can stop shaking. His mother rests her hand on the floor, a few centimeters away from his. Shouto cautiously slides his own across the tile until their fingertips touch.
She looks down at their hands, her left and his right. "One of my deepest regrets is that I never apologized, for what I did to you that day."
"But it's not your fault," Shouto insists. He doesn't know whether he's pleading with her or with himself. "It wasn't your fault, it wasn't..."
Mother telegraphs the moment of her other arm. She reaches over to ice the back of his head, a tender spot from banging into a cabinet door handle.
"Regardless of whose fault it was or wasn't, you were still hurt by my actions. And you're still hurting from them." Her eyes lock onto his. "You don't have to accept my apology, now or ever, but please know- I am deeply, truly sorry for the pain I've caused you."
The tea on the counter never gets made. It takes several more months before Shouto dares to roam around the apartment without his concealment.
3. Fuyumi.
Shouto isn't used to other people staring at him when he walks past them on the street. He's not used to other people in general. Most of them avert their gaze fairly quickly (quick enough to trick a pair of human eyes), but Shouto isn't fooled.
After dinner, he asks Fuyumi, “Can you help me dye my hair?”
She looks up from the scarf she's knitting. “To red? Or a different color?”
Shouto shakes his head. “I want my hair to be white on both sides.”
“Oh... you would have to bleach your hair, not dye it. Hair dye only works if you’re changing to a darker color.” Fuyumi sets down her handiwork and tries to position her hands casually. “Are you just going for a new look, or...”
“Sometimes people stare at me when I go out. I think it’s because my hair looks so weird.” Fuyumi's mouth twists, but she doesn't interrupt. “I want to try just having white hair. So I can look more like you, and Natsuo, and Mother."
“I see... Well, I don’t know if we should fully commit to bleaching your hair yet. There are some less permanent options we can try first.”
A week later, Fuyumi shows him a white wig that she ordered from online. She fits it onto his head, then trims the wig to match his current hair length (just long enough to cover where his human ears are supposed to be).
Shouto goes out in the wig, but people still stare at him. He realizes they must be staring at the scar, then. But he’s not really self-conscious about the scar. The red hair is an unpleasant reminder of his father, but his scar solely belongs to him.
In the end, he decides to forego the wig, mostly because it makes his scalp itch. When Fuyumi explains that he would need to recolor his roots every six to eight weeks, Shouto decides to keep his hair as is.
4. Mr. Yoshida.
Fuyumi helps him get a job at a small plant nursery that sells a combination of flower bouquets and live plants. One of her friends used to be the store's sole employee, but she recently stopped working to go on maternity leave. The shop owner, Yoshida, is a semi-retired salesman with a keen business acumen, but he has no aptitude for horticulture.
After a few days of training at the register and learning how to do inventory, Shouto takes to the work fairly quickly. He doesn't have the same affinity for the store's plants as he did for the trees in the Todoroki forest, but he can still sense what the plants are craving.
Under Shouto's careful nurturing, the plants in the nursery quickly recover from their mishandling after the previous employee's departure. Yoshida praises Shouto for his natural "green thumb" and asks if he's made any changes to the store's in-house fertilizer mix (he hasn't).
However, a week later, Yoshida scolds Shouto's work. He points an accusatory finger to a row of plants: their flourishing growth has caused the roots to break out of their pots.
"You gotta keep them at the right size, not too big and not too small. Or they won't sell!"
Shouto retorts, "What if the plants don't want to be sold?"
Yoshida gives him a bewildered look. "What on Earth are you talking about?!"
Shouto bites his tongue; he doesn't know how to talk his way out of that comment. Without attempting to explain himself, Shouto bows in token deference and reassures Yoshida that he'll take care of repotting the overenthusiastic plants.
It saddens him to ignore the plants' quiet yearnings for growth, but he transplants the specimens that have exceeded their containers and takes care to maintain the rest at their current size.
Ultimately, Yoshida doesn't fire him for his outburst or for overgrowing the plants. He tells Shouto that having some "eye candy" at the counter is good for business. Shouto doesn't know if he means eye-shaped candy or eye-flavored candy, but the plant shop doesn't sell either of those. As a compromise, he moves the chocolate display next to the cash register.
5. Natsuo.
After two weeks of working part-time, Shouto is given an envelope with more cash than he thinks he may ever need. The first thing he buys is some strawberry candy from the convenience store.
He waits until he gets home to try it. He expects the familiar flavors of wild strawberries from a patch growing near the Todoroki forest, but he’s sorely disappointed. The candy starts with an unpleasant sourness that makes his tongue tingle, then a cloying sweetness that he can’t get out of his mouth.
When Natsuo drops by the apartment in the afternoon, Shouto complains that the candy doesn’t taste like strawberries at all.
“Uh, yeah, that’s just how it is. Strawberry-flavored, not strawberry.”
“Why do they call it strawberry-flavored, if it doesn’t taste like strawberry?”
“Because- well- You’ll get used to it, after a while.”
Shouto huffs in disapproval and shoves the rest of the package into Natsuo’s hands. Natsuo rolls his eyes at the dramatics, but he pockets the candy and heads out to check on his experiments again.
The next morning, Shouto finds a small punnet of strawberries in the fridge. They don’t really taste like the ones from the forest, either. He still sends Natsuo a thank-you text with a strawberry emoji on the end.
6. Touya.
After a while, the novelty of living in the human world starts to fade. Shouto starts to feel worn down around so many people and buildings, and he wonders if he really belongs in the human world. For the first time, Shouto takes the train back to Midoriya's village without him.
Once he's back in the Todoroki forest, Shouto drops his concealment spell. It feels like letting go of a weight he's been carrying for months.
Shouto finds Touya overwatering the vegetable patch, the one he planted near the scorched remains of their old house.
"Can we spar?" Shouto asks.
Touya raises an eyebrow. "With elements, or without?"
"With. Somewhere with a lot of space."
They walk to a nearby clearing, where their father had forced Shouto to train for many years. Maybe Touya had been forced to train there, too. So much fire has charred the area that the only thing still capable of growing there is tough, stubby grass.
As soon as they both get into position, Shouto unleashes his ice across the field, all of his frustration and internal conflict rushing out at once. Touya melts the ice directly in front of him, letting the rest knock into the trees. When he counters, Shouto sends his own wave of flames. Some of his fire threatens to burn past the field, but Touya blocks it with his own elemental magic before it can scorch the surrounding flora.
Even with Touya going easy on him, it's a quick defeat. Shouto's out of practice, and his attacks veer recklessly wide due to his lack of focus. After only a few minutes, Touya's knee is on his back, and a warm hand hovers at the base of his neck.
Once Shouto taps out, his brother lets him up. “Okay, something’s clearly up with you. Care to share with the class?”
“I’m just... pent up. Living in the human world is a lot harder than I thought.”
"Yeah, I bet. Just wait until you have to start paying taxes."
"What are taxes?"
"...Never mind."
Touya sits under the base of a tree, his back resting against the heavy trunk. Shouto does the same. After a while, he asks, "Would you return the domain to me, next winter?"
Touya's expression sours. "What, am I doing that bad of a job? Or do you hate the human world that much?"
"You're not doing a bad job. And I don't hate it, but... it doesn't feel like home. It's confusing, and crowded, and way too complicated." Shouto swishes his tail in the dirt. "I don't know if I'll ever get used to it."
Touya gives him a look like he's chewing his tongue inside his mouth.
"If you really want the domain back, you can have it. And if Shigaraki tries to challenge you again, I'll kick his zombie ass." He lights a blue flame in his palm for emphasis, then lets it wink out. "But if you're just feeling homesick or something... then you can take the train again and visit. Or move back, even. But don't write yourself off just because you're still adjusting to human life."
Shouto isn't sure what he wants exactly, but he knows that his desire to return to the domain is not fueled by a desire to own it again.
Then he asks, "Are you still gonna kill the old man, if he comes back?" Touya hadn't renewed the banishment when the domain had been passed onto him.
"Maybe. I'm still thinking about it. And there's a whole lot of nothing to do around here, so there's a whole lot of time to think about shit."
That night, they sleep side by side in their fox forms, and Shouto dreams peacefully under the stars.
The next day, Shouto asks Touya if he should tell the rest of the family that he’s alive, or bring them to the domain to visit.
Touya says no to both: “I want to be the one to break the news. And I don’t think bringing them here is a good idea... I don’t know how Mom would take it.”
Before Shouto heads back to Shizuoka, Touya hands him a folded-up letter, addressed to the Himuras. Shouto agrees to deliver it.
"Oh, one more thing." Shouto pulls his cell phone from his pocket. "Do you have a phone number?"
"There's no reception around here, dumbass."
Shouto blinks slowly at him, pretending to understand but unsure how to respond.
Touya sighs into his splayed-out hand. "Ugh, fine." He grabs the phone and adds himself as a new contact. "There, happy?"
"Yes."
Shouto sends infrequent texts to his oldest brother at random, but the responses always come back on Wednesdays, around 2-3 AM. Unbeknownst to Shouto, Touya makes a weekly late-night habit of using his fox-fire to beam himself to the nearest town with cell service.
+1. Izuku, again.
In the end, Shouto decides to consult Izuku. Izuku always has the answers to things, even when he doesn't.
By the time he returns to Shizuoka, there's a heavy rainstorm well underway. The smell of the rain hitting pavement isn't quite the same as the petrichor he's used to, but Shouto tips his head back and enjoys the downpour all the same. He's soaked by the time he reaches Izuku's apartment, but once he's under the awning, Shouto uses his left side to dry off the excess moisture in his clothes.
When he rings the doorbell, one of Izuku's roommates answers the door. He gives Shouto a brief greeting, then calls over his shoulder, "Hey Midoriya, it's your boyfr-"
"Got it, I'll be right there!" Midoriya skids past the view from the doorframe; his socks slip on the hardwood. When he comes to the door, Shouto can see raindrops scattered in his hair. "Hi."
"Hi."
"Um, do you want to come in...?"
Shouto shakes his head. "Sorry if this is a bad time."
"It's not, I just got back from class." Izuku grabs an umbrella and slips on his waterlogged shoes by the door. "Hey Kimura, when Sano comes back, can you tell him his laundry's totally drenched?"
"Why do I have to-"
"Thanks, bye!"
Izuku lets Shouto take the lead, but holds the umbrella over both of their heads. They end up wandering into a small public park.
"Is everything okay?" Izuku asks.
"I've been thinking about going back to the forest." Shouto says without preamble.
"Oh." Izuku's face falls, almost imperceptibly. "Did I do something wrong?"
"What? No, it's nothing like that." Shouto stares past the fledgling trees dotting the park, out at the looming backdrop of towering buildings. "I just don't know if I belong here. There are still a lot of things that I don't understand about humans, and I'm not sure if I ever will. And over half of my blood is youkai, so by that logic... maybe that's what I'm meant to be.
"I went back to visit Touya last week, and I almost asked him to give the domain back to me. But... I don't know if I could spend the rest of my life in the youkai world, either. I would miss the rest of my family. And I would miss you."
"So it's like you're feeling homesick, but you're not sure where home is anymore..." Shouto gives a noncommittal shrug; Izuku's summary isn't exactly what he had in mind, but it's not that far off.
"I've kind of been feeling that way too, recently. I have to start applying for jobs next year, and I'm not sure where I want to go after university. I know it's not the same thing, but I think a lot of people our age feel unsure about where they fit in this world. Or where they’re going to fit in.”
Izuku tilts his head out from under the umbrella, staring into the rain as more of it soaks into his hair. "But maybe we don't have to choose? Maybe there's a life where we can fit into all of the places we want to be a part of."
"Is it really that easy?"
Izuku smiles upwards. "It would be nice, wouldn't it? I feel kind of silly talking like this when I don't know the answer, either. But it's okay to be unsure. It's okay to not have everything figured out yet."
For a moment, Shouto wonders if his feelings of malaise aren't really about living in the human world, but actually stem from living without a sense of purpose. For most of his life, his singular goal was to overpower his old man in order to take control of the domain and escape his father's curse. After that, he still had a clear responsibility to nurture and protect the inhabitants of the forest. But now, his path moving forward is not so clear.
The conversation in the park doesn't solve everything; in fact, it doesn't solve much at all. Still, Shouto's body feels lighter as they walk back to Izuku's apartment. Izuku leans his umbrella by the front door before he goes inside, but Shouto leaves it there.
Through the springtime rain, he begins his journey home.