Work Text:
Izuku is exhausted, and frankly is losing his will to give a shit.
He’s been bombarded with tests, missions, training (as a class, with All Might, and by himself), and nightmares have been plaguing him for the past month. The dreams never stick with him, but he always wakes up gasping, sheets knotted around his legs and sweat dripping down his back. He’s taken to forcing himself to stay awake as long as he can so he doesn’t feel that awful fear of a nightmare he doesn’t remember. He’s lost count of how many cups of coffee he’s had today.
So that’s why his filter has been thrown out the window. It’s also why he’s in the commons with the two main squads, his head resting on Kacchan’s lap because it looked so comfortable and he’s so tired . Why he hasn’t been blasted away yet is unbeknownst to him, but Izuku doesn’t care either way.
He regrets not just going to bed. Doing that would have made what was about to happen never take place.
“Awww poor Midori is so sleepy! He looks so cute when he’s tired!” Mina exclaims, being way too loud. She grabs a brownie from a plate that’s full of them, sitting on one of the short tables placed in the commons.
Uraraka and Asui agree with Mina, offering their own “Awwws” as well. Izuku wishes they’d stop, but he doesn’t have it in him to be embarrassed.
Izuku can sense Kacchan tense in irritation, so he prepares himself to be thrown off of his lap.
But that doesn’t happen. Only an irritated shout of, “Will you extras cut it out! Jesus.”
No one’s affected by Katsuki’s outburst. To them, it’s a part of daily life. A routine.
“I’m surprised that you haven’t thrown Midoriya across the room yet, Bakubro. You normally can’t stand when he’s breathing in your direction,” Kirishima says as he takes a bite of a brownie. This makes Izuku sad, because it’s true. Although he and Katsuki are something akin to friends now, Izuku still has the uncanny talent of annoying Katsuki just by being in the same vicinity as him.
His comment is meant with a rough tch. Izuku is thankful Katsuki doesn’t yell again– he can’t handle loud noises right now.
“Well, since we’re all down here, we should play Truth or Dare!” Mina yells out just when Kacchan starts to run his fingers through Izuku’s chaotic hair. He wonders if Katsuki even realizes that he’s doing it, not that Izuku is complaining. He doesn’t have the luxury of getting touched too often -unless it’s fighting- and he’ll take as many of Kacchan’s pets as he can get.
Even if that means he has to play an exhausting game of Truth or Dare.
“That’s a great idea, Mina!” Ochako says, clapping her hands together, and then grabbing a brownie.
“That is an excellent idea as long as we are respectful and don’t break any rules,” Iida orders, but everyone brushes him off. It’s not often that they all get to hang out like this. Without any worries of school or villains. This time is something to be grateful for, no matter how short it’s going to be.
Izuku feels his mind growing foggier by the minute. His thoughts turn warm and fuzzy, but he’s fighting the exhaustion. He needs coffee.
They play a few rounds, as they let Katsuki and Izuku just be for a while. Izuku has a fun time watching Todoroki play. It’s his first time playing the game, and he takes it very seriously. Even when he’s dared to prank call his dad, which Izuku can tell gives him great pleasure.
The plate of brownies is almost empty now, the only ones who haven’t had one are Katsuki and Izuku. Katsuki because he doesn’t like sweets, and Izuku because the only thing that sounds good at the moment is sleep. Or caffeine.
They do and say silly things, most of it turning into background noise for Izuku. He feels himself losing the fighting battle of staying awake, and Katsuki running his fingers through his hair isn’t helping.
Just when Izuku was about to give in, Asui (Tsuyu. They want to be called Tsuyu. Izuku has such a hard time remembering that. Maybe it’s because it’s only a name friends can call them, and Izuku is still getting used to the idea of having friends) asks, “Midoriya-Chan, truth or dare?”
Izuku opens his eyes at this and begrudgingly sits up from Kacchan’s lap. He could’ve sworn the blond huffing in what sounded to be disappointment, but ruled it out as the fatigue making him imagine things.
“Uhh, truth?” He didn’t know he got included in the game and doesn’t know how to feel about it. He doesn’t remember the last time he’s played one of these childish games. Has he ever?
Tsuyu smiles. Their smile is great for a hero, Izuku thinks. It makes people feel safe and warm. Does he have a smile like that? He hopes so. If he can’t smile through the fear, the depression of being a hero (he’s realized long ago that hero work is only glamorous for the people who are there for the glamor), then what is he worth?
“What is your favorite memory from middle school?” He feels Katsuki stiffen next to him, and Izuku himself is taken aback. Favorite memory?
“What?” His voice comes out as a croak, small and broken up.
“You never talked about your life before you joined U.A. The only thing we know is that you and Bakugou-Chan grew up together,” Asui answers.
This piques everyone’s interest -except for Kacchan-. Even Todoroki is leaning in a bit.
And this is when shit hits the fan, and Izuku’s filter is nowhere to be found.
He laughs, thinking it genuinely funny, “Aw man,” he starts, trying to get his mind to work. There had to be one good memory, but he can’t think of any, “All I can think of is that I was bullied so hard,” Izuku finally answers. And maybe it’s the way he said it, or how uncomfortable it made everyone, but they start to wheeze with laughter. Izuku’s glad he can cause that laughter.
Katsuki’s face turns sour, like he just chugged a whole glass of pure lemon juice.
“Kacchan over here is like, ‘ oh my god’,” Izuku continues. His laughter is muddy as he leans his head on Katsuki’s shoulder. It’s firm with muscle, but it also radiates warmth.
“Next round now!” Sero says quickly. It’s obvious he’s trying not to be awkward, but it only makes the situation funnier.
“That’s so sad!” Uraraka points out. Izuku has a hard time understanding her, and shrugs it off.
“That is unacceptable behavior!” Iida shouts, making Izuku wince. Why does everyone have to be so goddamn loud all of the time?
“Wait, wait, no, let me think about it!” Izuku starts again, not being able to stop his mouth from running. He makes hand motions like he’s looking through something, “Just let me rummage through my trauma.” Todoroki huffs out a laugh at this.
“Midoriya,” Shoto says seriously, “After you're done, can you help me rummage through mine?”
“Todoroki, no!” Uraraka shouts, struggling not to laugh.
“Yeah, yeah, of course, Todoroki,” Izuku replies. He’d be happy to help his friend. Helping makes him feel useful. Or, less useless.
“Deku,” Katsuki harshly whispers at him. When was the last time Izuku had more than a couple of hours of sleep? A week? Two weeks?
Izuku sits up again and puts his pointer finger to his chin, pretending to think, “I think my favorite memory was when I wasn’ t getting bullied.”
Then Tsuyu says, “Favorite was when I was at home-” and then starts to break out in laughter. Everyone does the same, except for Katsuki, who looks like he’s about to blow a fuse.
Izuku is going to regret this when he’s sane again.
“Stooop, I’m going to cry!” Mina says, laughing so hard that Izuku sees actual tears spring from her eyes.
Izuku can’t stop, he’s making people happy , “When my- when my mom picked me up from a really rough,” He stops to break out in laughter. He feels drunk, if this fuzzy feeling is what being drunk is like. “From a really rough day.”
And then, just because Izuku feels like he needs to amp it up a bit to make this bad decision at least a tiny bit worth it, he wheezes, “I live in a society of heroes, but the heroes were never there.” This causes everyone to start dying. Maybe they’re the ones who are drunk, or high. He’s heard that Sero has a hefty stash of weed in his room. He hears Katsuki sigh, but sees a twinkle in his eye.
Under any other non-sleep deprived circumstance, Izuku would never have said anything. He would’ve made up B.S. some to answer Asui’s question, but he wasn’t mentally there at the moment. Hence the reason for not giving a shit.
Izuku, with his head back on Katsuki’s lap after an infinity of laughter, wonders if everyone thought that he was joking, and that was why they were laughing. For whatever reason why they all started to laugh along with him, he hopes that they don’t mention this tomorrow. And if he’s really lucky, then maybe they’ll completely forget about it.
“Okay, Deku, you need to sleep. You look like you haven’t slept in days,” Katsuki tells Izuku. For once, his voice isn’t irritated, but soothing. It entrances Izuku, and forces another wave of sleepiness over him. Erasing the short burst of energy he got from laughing.
“Bakugou, don’t be such a party pooper! Izuku can take another few hours!” Denki yells, his mouth stained with chocolate. Izuku buries his head into Kacchan’s chest, trying to muffle the volume.
“All of you extras need to go to bed. You’re all fucking high.” This catches Izuku’s interest. Maybe he was right about them being high.
“We are not high!” Iida exclaims, sounding very offended, but extremely stoned at the same time.
“Did everyone eat those brownies on the table?” Katsuki asks, nodding to the, now almost empty, plate of brownies.
“Maybe just a few,” Uraraka says, looking slightly sheepish.
Katsuki sighs, and Izuku’s barely awake brain starts to catch on.
“Oh shit!” Sero shouts, and then starts to burst out in laughter, “I forgot I put weed in those. Oops!”
With that, everyone starts laughing and giggling. Izuku’s concerned for them, but can’t bring his body to get up and help. They’ll die down eventually. Hopefully.
Katsuki gently (yes, gently, Izuku is surprised as well) scoops Izuku up onto his back and begins to carry him. Izuku drops his head down onto Katsuki’s shoulder and nuzzles his face in the crook of his neck. Katsuki doesn’t say anything, so he assumes that this is okay, to be this close to him. And it’s weird, being close to Katsuki who’s always seemed so untouchable. It’s different, but it’s a good different.
Kacchan smells like pine cones and fabric softener. It’s something that Izuku has never noticed before, and it’s a nice surprise. The smell reminds him of home and playing in the woods.
“Mmm-chan,” Izuku mutters. He doesn’t want to sleep. Why does he have to sleep? Sleeping is a waste of time. He could be training or studying or something else useful.
“You’re going to bed, Deku,” Katsuki replies. Izuku isn’t surprised that Katsuki knew what he had been thinking, or at least the main idea. Kacchan always knew Izuku better than himself, and while that was frustrating at times, it was also comforting.
He hears a door opening, and Izuku expects the room to be his, but it’s not. His barely-open eyes show him that this room is Katsuki’s. He doesn’t think that Katsuki has ever let anyone in his room before, and this makes Izuku feel special.
“Why are you being so kind? And what was wrong with our friends?”
Katsuki ignores his first question, “They were eating the brownies Sero made. They had pot in them.”
Izuku starts to laugh. Small chuckles that are light and airy. If he was more alert, he would have realized that Katsuki’s ears turned pink at the sound of his laugh, but Izuku didn’t because he was hardly aware of anything.
All he could think was that of course that would happen to them. Those groups of dorks.
“They’re idiots,” Izuku breathes out. This causes Katsuki to huff out a laugh of his own. A sound that is incredibly lovely to Izuku’s airs.
Katsuki lays him down on his bed, and Izuku starts to curl up in a little ball. He can’t move, and that makes him feel weak. Heroes can’t be weak. Not him.
“You haven’t been sleeping. Why?” Katsuki demanded. Izuku knew he wasn't asking, and would bother him until he gave a satisfying answer.
Izuku closed his eyes. He wondered what their friends were doing. Were they still laughing over being stoned by brownies? He hopes they’ll forget everything that he said tomorrow. He doesn’t think he can deal with having to explain his childhood to several people. Or even one.
“Too much stuff to do. Training, homework, studying. Not like I sleep well, anyway.” Izuku mutters the last part to himself, not expecting Kacchan to hear it.
Katsuki starts to go under the covers as well, and Izuku doesn’t even have the motivation to feel flustered about sharing a bed with him.
“Nightmares,” Katsuki answers for himself. He’s always been smart. Izuku isn’t shocked he guessed the correct answer, but that doesn’t mean he’s not grumpy about it. He hates talking about his troubles with sleeping. It leaves him feeling vulnerable and exposed.
Izuku just squeezes his eyes shut tighter. He thinks he might actually get to sleep for a full night.
He doesn’t know how much longer he can go with carrying this exhaustion.
“Well I guess I’ll just have to kick the shit out of your nightmares, then.”
This makes Izuku huff a laugh out of surprise. Of course this is something Bakugou Katsuki would say. “You can’t do that,” Izuku says. Katsuki doesn’t have a quirk that allows him to fight nightmares. Although, that would be super cool.
Katsuki turns over to his side and faces Izuku. Their noses are almost touching, and Izuku feels safe. Funny how someone that used to make him shake with anxiety now makes him feel like home.
Kacchan’s room is dark, but Izuku can see the determination in Katsuki’s eyes like a bright star. “Watch me,” Katsuki refutes. And Izuku believes him. So he nods and closes his eyes once again.
He falls asleep that night, and wakes up without gasping, but smiling.
_______
It’s not until the morning, in the common rooms, that he sees their friends again. They look like shit, and that’s incredibly funny to Izuku. Katsuki especially, who is beside him cackling.
“What the hell happened last night?!” Kamiari slurs.
Izuku just continues to laugh by Katsuki’s side.