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Kimi had always hated the cold air, but he adored the winter cabin he had bought with Sebastian with all his heart. It was just, winter wasn't his favorite season at all. Then again, if it was for Sebastian, he would brave even the Arctic colds, so...
"In time, you eventually grow to tolerate stuff you normally hate." He'd say when he'd get asked about it by their friends. "In time, you are bestowed with such precious things that they make the trouble worthwhile if not downright make you love the trouble itself." He'd smile, his fond eyes would find Sebastian even across the room. And their friends would grin and laugh at his expense, patting him on his back and shaking their heads at the way he'd never hid how head over heels he was for the other man. "You are such a sappy romantic, Kimi..." They'd say and Kimi would just nod. No need to deny that, because it was true.
Snow or ice didn't matter as long as he could hold Sebastian's hand and be near him in some capacity. Unpleasant they might be, they were even welcome now, because Sebastian thrived in the cold, loved the nature and the simplicity of being close to it as much as he could during the winter time. So, this rustic mountain cabin was where they'd spend quite some of the heaviest month of the winter every year.
Kimi clearly remembered the time of their purchase of this place. There had even been some magazine news upon 'the mysterious cabin Sebastian Vettel had bought in Finland'. He huffed at the memory, shaking his head at the tenacity of the media. Well, at least they had never found out how Kimi and Sebastian had bought the cabin and the premises together and visited it every winter and summer and it was like an unspoken and unseen knot that tied them to each other.
Kimi marvelled at the reassurance that this small wooden house up in the woods in this godforsaken place had always provided to him. It had withstood its ground through Kimi leaving F1, leaving Ferrari for the second time and even retiring. It was here and no matter how much Kimi denied ever having dwelled on the thought, he had always hoped that it'd continue be their anchor thru thick and thin.
Every year, before Sebastian's commitments would end at the end of the season, Kimi would arrive first to carefully restock the cabin's pantry, check it out for any repairs it might need and make sure it was clean and ready for them to spend at least a month of their winter break there.
But this year was different. This year, Sebastian had retired, too. He had a lot of loose ends to tie before he could finally settle into the life of being a retired Formula One superstar; so, Kimi had been in the cabin by himself for a week, doing his best lovingly in preparation for Sebastian's arrival, waiting in hope. And yesterday, Sebastian had joined him and it felt like finding the sun back in the Arctic. His personal sun... Helping him in rediscovering the meaning of peace and quiet in the harshness of the stark winter that surrounded them. He believed Sebastian's soft smile had to be a balm to all the chill and the frost and he secretly grinned at his own sappy train of thought, aware that if Sebastian knew, he'd never let him live it down.
It was snowing now and Kimi doubted there was anything better than sitting at the porch of the cabin and watching the shiny flakes dance in the sky before they'd gently settle down around them like some spare gem dust from the heavens.
A quick look around the house proved that Sebastian was sitting in their living room with a small organizer on his lap, jotting down something into it, fully concentrated on what he was writing. Kimi didn't bother him; instead, he made a beeline to the kitchen. He had some work to do.
He boiled lots of water. There were hot water bottles he had to fill. And then, he went for the pantry. Marshmallows and thin biscuits for a snack with some honey and a bottle of whiskey...
He got some lemon from the fridge and sliced it thinly. Then, he looked for some cloves and cinnamon sticks. He considered using tea bags, but on second thought, shrugged it off. Too much hassle...
After choosing two insulated mugs and securing some boiling hot water in a thermos, he placed everything on a sturdy tray. It was finally time to go outside and make some arrangements.
Their porch had a cushioned wooden swing facing the woods that the cabin was located in. He bought out the faux fur and the outdoor blankets and then carried over the surprise fireball he had specially ordered from a renowned metal smith and brought here with him.
Filling the tray of the sphere with small chopped wood and coal, he expertly built a nice fire and admired the metal work that made up the fireball which resembled to two huge trees hugging each other.
He pulled up a small coffee table towards the swing and went back inside to bring the hot water bottles. Two for each of them, to keep them extra warm while watching the nature... He hid them under the blankets and then went back inside, turning on the fairy lights of the porch before he'd look for Sebastian's beanie and fingerless gloves. When he found them, he returned back to the living room and approached the other man with a giddy smile.
Sebastian looked up at him with a smile of his own, closing the organizer and automatically reaching for the coat Kimi was holding for him. "What were you up to out there, dearest?" He asked even as he stood up and shrugged on the thick coat.
Kimi's smile grew. He stepped closer and helped Sebastian wear his gloves as if he was helping out a child. "We'll do some snow watching." He explained, carefully brushing Sebastian's curls away from his forehead before he pulled his beanie down for him.
Sebastian grinned at the way he was being donned up like a doll and let Kimi do as he wanted. "But you hate the cold." He reminded, one eyebrow rising in amusement.
Kimi shrugged dismissively, zipping up Sebastian's coat. "I took all the precautions, Sebi." He assured and placed a small kiss on the other man's lips before pulling him to the front door by his hand.
"How dependable..." Sebastian bit on his lip, excited, because he knew Kimi would certainly make the experience worthwhile for enduring the chill of the snowy evening.
After wearing their boots, Kimi showed off his preparations with a florish of his hand, inviting Sebastian out.
As expected, the intricate fireball had become Sebastian's focus of attention immediately. "Kimi, this is gorgeous!" He approached in awe. The metal work of the huge sphere was so delicate that it was impossible to look away from it.
"Happy to hear you liked it." Kimi pushed his hands into his pockets and proudly watched Sebastian walk around the fireball to observe the design of it in admiration.
"Like?" Sebastian was saying, "I love it..." He found his way back to Kimi and pulled him closee for a kiss, taking his breath away. "Thanks for getting it made for me, dearest."
Kimi's breath quaked in his chest when Sebastian stepped back, making him follow the other man towards the swing like a besotted marionette on strings. One would think, after all these years together, after sharing countless private moments, a kiss of thanks wouldn't turn the Iceman into a mush like this, but no... Sebastian had always had this power over him and Kimi had never complained.
Just like how Kimi had helped him wear his stuff a moment ago, Sebastian draped the largest blanket over both their shoulders and then sat down with Kimi and draped the other blanket over their laps too keep in the warmth of the hot water bottles.
Giggling like some high school crushes at the way they both squirmed and tried to arrange their limbs while keeping close, they finally found a comfortable position and just breathed, waiting to calm down.
They snuggled together, holding hands under the blanket, both their eyes on the fireball, watching the flames illuminate the evening into a romantic reddish hue.
The fairy lights, the cracking of the wood and the coal, the smell of the crisp pine in the air all filled in the silence. For a few moments, in Kimi's ears, the tranquility of the nature around them was audible in the content breaths coming out of Sebastian's lips and he thought there was nothing more vibrant than him in that moment with that smile he had and with those long eyelashes resting upon his cheeks as Sebastian had closed his eyes just for a second as if to savor all the sensations better.
"Did you like it?" Kimi softly asked, almost afraid to bother Sebastian's peacefulness, but also in need to hear his thoughts.
Sebastian shifted a little then, turning a bit to look at him. "Absolutely beautiful, Kimi." He praised, giving a squeeze at the hand in his grasp. "Thank you so much." Kimi's shy but pleased smile was everything; so, he leaned in and kissed him again.
This time, Kimi tried to follow the kiss longer and that made Sebastian chuckle against his lips. "You know this will turn counter productive fast, right?" He asked in a low voice, his eyes twinkling with naughtiness.
Kimi deflated a bit at the reminder, but he relented. He wanted Sebastian to watch the snow, enjoy the slice of heaven they got in here. They'd have all the time in the world to make love later on. "Just another kiss..." He demanded, though. And Sebastian didn't deny him.
His fingers reached up to Kimi's chin and directed his face to an angle he wanted before he kissed him with his lips already parted.
Kimi swore his toes curled in his boots when Sebastian slowly licked into his mouth and then hummed against his lips, his hold on the side of his face firm yet gentle. He reciprocated the kiss ardently and sighed in contentment when Sebastian rested his forehead against his.
"So, you think you took enough fare for those marshmallows and biscuits on the tray?" Sebastian laughed at the way Kimi's dazed expression changed into surprise, eyes widening at the question.
Kimi had totally forgotten about the snacks. "Yeah..." He answered, feeling self conscious about how he had been just so lost in each and every reaction of his beloved. It was a bit embarrassing really, but Sebastian was special. Because, normally, even though Kimi knew no shame at all, when it came to Sebastian, shyness and embarrassment had always been a part of his reaction to Sebastian's bold and playful flirting and Kimi was aware it was only happening because he loved him way too much.
He had to get out of their cuddling and lose Sebastian's body heat even though it felt like torture. But he also wanted to please him with the snacks and the drink he had prepared. So, he straightened up and arranged the stuff on the coffee table, stabbing huge marshmallows with metal skewers and handing them to Sebastian who giggled and sniffed at the confectionery before holding it close to the fire.
"Oh, so scrumptious..." Sebastian sing songed and bit on his lower lip in hunger.
Kimi chuckled. "You are like a huge cat."
"You know I can never resist sweets." Sebastian defended and then raised a sleazy eyebrow at Kimi's way, full of naughty innuendo.
Kimi shook his head at him in fond exasperation and placed the small plate of biscuits, chocolate, and marshmallows onto his lap. "Then, eat as many as you like, Sebi."
Sebastian caught the first melted marshmallow with the thin biscuit and placed a chocolate piece upon it before pressing them down with another biscuit. He bit into it quickly, making a show of it, while pointedly looking into Kimi's eyes and grinning. "I plan to do just that, dearest." He declared.
Kimi couldn't help but swallow at the way Sebastian hummed while chewing the gooey treat, fully aware that Sebastian insinuated and alluded to some other things with his exaggerated pleasure in eating his snacks. "Make some for me, too, please?" He asked timidly, knowing his docileness was also a turn on for Sebastian.
The blue of his eyes sharpening at Kimi's request, Sebastian nodded and went on making one for Kimi, too.
S'mores needed something warm to go down together with smoothly; so, some hot toddy was both tasty and easy to make. Kimi placed the spices and the lemon slices into their mugs and poured the hot water over them before he mixed in the honey. He showed Sebastian how much whiskey he was pouring for him to decide.
"A bit more..." Sebastian was in the mood for more than just some warm drink.
Kimi obliged.
In a matter of minutes, they had a plate full off s'mores between them and two mugs of smoking hot toddy cradled in their hands.
Kimi fed Sebastian the s'mores one by one, occasionally taking a bite out of the rapidly cooling down treats himself. They talked about what Sebastian had been writing down in his organizer before Kimi had dragged him out. It was a Christmas dinner menu.
"You can make some focaccia, right? I can still trust the strength of your biceps?" Sebastian was asking, that delicate eyebrow rise was playfully challenging.
"Of course." Kimi nodded, "I can knead you the whole world if you'd ask."
At that Sebastian chuckled and bit on his lower lip, clearly impressed.
They were drinking their second drinks and it was quite dark out now. But they could still see around the house thanks to the fairy lights and the flames in the fireball. "What else you plan to cook?"
"A huge chicken roast in the baking compartment of the stove?" Sebastian offered, leaning against Kimi's side heavily. "There'd be too much left overs, though."
"You know I'd eat them the next day, too." Kimi wasn't a picky eater and Sebastian really made good roast, so... "Some potato gravy and mulled wine to go with it?" He hoped.
"Yeah, and anything sweet?" Sebastian doubted Kimi would want any, but he asked nevertheless.
"We can sit outside and make s'mores again?" Kimi offered, making Sebastian giggle. "You seemed to have liked them a lot just now."
"Alright," Sebastian agreed, sipping at the final dregs of his drink, pleasantly buzzed. "This time, you'll make them and with double chocolate, okay?"
Kimi agreed quickly, Sebastian's love of chocolate was never going to be not cute. "Anything you want..." He whispered, his promise was uttered never lightly. He wounded his arm around the other man under the blanket and relaxed against him further.
Then they fell silent, the nature around them equally silent and still. The snow was still falling and the flakes seemed fatter under the dim light provided by their fire and the porch lights. The distant hoots of an owl was heard and Sebastian sighed heavily. Though Kimi wondered what the other man was thinking, he didn't ask to not disturb the serene night.
It was as if time had stopped and they were living in a snow globe of their own, away from the world and everything that was unsavory in it. For the moment... It felt unreal and magical in a way Kimi feared even a whisper might be enough to break the spell that bound them. They could forever rock to the chilly wind of the night on this swing, watching the fire burn, pleasantly drunk on whiskey and fed on sweets. Warm and comfortable enough to fall asleep. In each other's arms... Kimi knew they wouldn't survive the night in that case, but for a crazy moment, he thought he wouldn't mind it if it was with Sebastian.
He recognized his thoughts were spiralling to the darker side; so, to ground himself back to the reality, he leaned in and kissed Sebastian's reddened nose and forehead.
Sebastian leaned a bit away and looked up at Kimi as if sensing his momentary grim resolution there. He searched the green grey eyes and saw the forelorn love there and smiled in hopes of providing some light. "I love you." He said out of the blue, but actually very much on purpose. "And I would have stayed with you forever like this. If it were possible..."
At first, Kimi's eyes went wide in red handed guilt at the way Sebastian had read his mind so easily, but then his expression turned to complete relief for being understood like this. "I know, Sebi... I know..." He sighed and leaned in to rub their noses against each other, but Sebastian tilted his head to the side and caught his lips firmly.
Kimi quickly parted his lips for him and hugged him back as Sebastian shifted on the swing and climbed onto his lap for a few minutes as he continued devouring Kimi's mouth like a starved man.
Wet kisses after wet kisses, Sebastian was passionately nipping and sucking onto his lip, holding his face and neck, his chilled fingers finding warm skin and making Kimi shudder.
It was easy to guess what his intentions were when he fell away and pulled Kimi up from the swing, too. "Let's go back in before we decide that sleeping out here would be lovely." He joked, tugging Kimi towards the front door.
Kimi let himself be swept away as usual, already dazed with the kiss they had just shared. "Have something lovelier in mind?" He asked as Sebastian closed the door upon the winter outside with the wolfish grin of someone scheming naughty things, his hands all over his own and Kimi's clothes.
"Yeah, I do... I plan to eat you up just like the s'mores from before." Sebastian took out both their beanies and kicked off his boots even as he also helped Kimi out of his coat in quick and too precise movements for a guy who'd just drunk a good amount of whiskey. His enthusiasm gave Kimi his mirth back.
"Are we in a hurry?"
"Dearest, I am in need of some immediate warmth. I am half frozen." Sebastian just cast aside his own coat and quickly took off his thick sweater, shivering with a grin on his face.
Kimi could only laugh softly at his beloved's antics, his eyes drawn to the prominent bulge Sebastian was already sporting. "Frozen everywhere but there, huh?" He was following Sebastian's laughter up to their bedroom, already taking off his own sweatshirt, too.
When in their room, Sebastian pushed him back on to their bed and quickly climbed over him, his long hair framing his face becomingly as Kimi finger combed it to one side to caress his face. "I forgot to say it in my astonishment down there." He scratched at Sebastian's beard lovingly and run his hands over his sides and chest, reverend. All his touches were admiring the silkiness of the other man's skin.
Sebastian looked at him in puzzlement for a second, his hand on Kimi's belt buckle.
"I love you, Sebi." Kimi tucked a stray lock of hair behind Sebastian's ear and smiled up at him softly. "Thank you for coming back here. Thank you for still loving me."
Sebastian stopped, his smile falling away a bit, his eyes observing his beloved carefully. "Still?" He asked as gently as he could as if he feared hurting Kimi. His eyes wide and wet, he couldn't believe Kimi would even think this way. "I have always and will forever love you, Kimi..." His words were firm but also equally ardent. "Just like the way I know you love me."
The conviction, the sureness in Sebastian's eyes and voice melted something in Kimi's heart and remade it, the emotion bubbling up in his throat like a sweet ache and clogged it.
Their eyes were on each other, their hearts hammering in their chest...
He tugged Sebastian down to himself gently, gingerly, yet Sebastian could still feel the desperation in his touch. Now they were chest to chest, skin to skin, heart to heart... "Make love to me, then..." He demanded heatedly and Sebastian didn't even let him take a breath before he claimed it right thru his lips.
If he had felt the wetness that started on the corners of Kimi's eyes and disappeared into his hair line, he didn't say anything about it. Instead, he made love to Kimi until this time he cried with the pleasure of it and forgot why he had felt insecure in the first place.
So, even the greatest loves needed assurance from time to time, Sebastian thought, his fingers playing with Kimi's short hair and his lips resting on his forehead as Kimi slept in his arms. While it was cute in a way, it also had made Sebastian feel a bit faint with dread, he couldn't deny that, when Kimi had looked up at him with the calm acceptance of a person who had resigned himself to the fate whatever his lover would dish out for him as long it came from his lover alone.
Sebastian knew that it had just been the melancholy of the cold and still nature around them speaking back there, but he vowed to never let Kimi feel like that again. Ever...
He hugged Kimi's sleeping form closer and covered them with the blankets safely.
They had always been the joy of each other since they'd first met, not a grim resignation. So, Sebastian got a new resolve to keep it that way in the new year and the coming years, too, no matter how long the winters lasted and how determined Kimi was to brave the cold for his sake.
At times like this, he just needed to shine harder for both their steads, carrying on through winters to reach summers as many times as Kimi needed him to do.
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Fin.