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“What else do you know?”
Neteyam fell silent. He hummed once, sinking deep into his thoughts while he flexed his hands. He’d start one sign before stopping himself, as if he forgot all he learned, like a nonverbal form of stuttering. He racked his mind for a phrase, anything to say that would impress you. Not that it would be a challenge, but he also wanted to stick to simple phrases, things that you could remember and understand easily. It was endearing, really, how quickly he took to the role of teacher for you.
In the meantime, you looked down at your ankles, watching the water ripple and shift with every step you took. Still unfamiliar with the area, you kept to the outskirts of the village, walking along the shore. Despite your proximity to the village, the beauty here stole your breath. From the unique design of the village to the crystal reflection of the sun bouncing off the water’s surface. The water itself stretched far beyond the seawall bordering the reef, touching the horizon. Where the sky and sea became one, endlessly blue like the Na’vi you walked among.
Months had gone by since the Sully family left the Omaticaya clan. To you, a lifetime had passed before you heard anything from them, and it was when Norm received word of Kiri’s seizure. Of course, being close friends with the Sully children, you just had to see them. Norm hadn’t been keen to bring you along, but your admittedly immature begging and the stress of an immediate departure prompted him to give permission if only so he could finish packing gear without you delaying him precious seconds. Besides, another pair of hands on board to mule around gear didn’t hurt.
Kiri was overjoyed to have you, squeezing you in a tight hug when she got the chance. She wasn’t the only one. All the Sully children swarmed you, asking about the clan and talking over each other to fill you in on everything they’ve been up to. It was quite the scene, their tails whipping excitedly while all of you bounced around each other, just so happy to be reunited.
Days had passed since your arrival. You were lucky to spend more time with them, if not for the reason that Norm wished to monitor Kiri for the time being. Just to ensure she was stable. And then, you would leave with Norm. As much as it made you and the others sad to separate again, you’d been on the fence about their offer. They proposed that you stay with them in the village. An idea like that would take convincing from their parents and Norm, but together your big pouty faces would win them over. It was just that…despite the beauty and lack of danger from the RDA, you faced a different annoyance here. One you wouldn’t want to endure if you did stay.
Your thoughts come to a halt when a prickly feeling tingled up your spine, sensing that you were being watched. You looked up and, in the distance, found a Metkayina child no taller than Tuk staring at you. Their face betrayed the wonder and distaste they felt about you. You locked eyes with them, even as another child approached them. Their ears twitched as the other whispered something and pointed at you indiscreetly. Their faces scrunched and they giggled to themselves.
A tightness squeezed your insides at their staring and blatant disregard for you. You hunched your shoulders in a poor attempt to make yourself invisible. Slowing your pace, you let Neteyam’s body dwarf you, acting as a wall to hide you from their gaze. You couldn’t shake the feeling that they still stared, even if their view was blocked. Looking back to the water as you walked calmly, you tried to preoccupy your mind with it.
“There’s this one,” Neteyam said, prompting you to look up at him. His wide, cat-like eyes locked onto yours, making sure you paid attention. Then, moving his hands as he would in conversation, he translated for you. “Breathe.”
You frowned. The purpose of their sign language was to communicate underwater. Why would they need to know how to say that? Or, maybe there was a reason but your negative thoughts wouldn’t let you think straight. “Underwater?”
“Not exactly. More like saying to calm your heart.” Neteyam laid his hand on his stomach and demonstrated a long inhale. “To stay underwater longer, you need to relax.” He inhaled deeply through his nose and parted his lips, exhaling slowly. You watched his shoulders fall in tandem with his breath. With a smile, he pointed at your exopack. “Not that you need to worry about holding your breath.”
Just as you were about to tease him, or brag about your one advantage underwater, you spotted the turquoise skin of a Metkayina in your peripheral vision. You pursed your lips and looked ahead to find a teen boy approaching you with a group following close behind. Neteyam saw them the same time you did, both of you stopping when they stood in front of you. To have all their eyes on you filled you with unease. You inched closer to Neteyam for the small amount of comfort his presence would provide.
In your short time here, you learned quickly that the Metkayina here had rarely seen a human, if ever. The adults avoided you when they could and their tolerance had been understandable if a little hurtful. It was the younger ones, curious and rebellious to their parents' demands to stay away, that truly made you think twice about staying with the Sullys. They were overt in their distaste for your very existence. Compared to them, you were petite, weaker, and fragile. A rather lame alien. The coarse sound exerted from the exopack recycling oxygen reminded you of that.
The apparent leader of the small group looked you up and down. He seemed to like that he looked down on you with his taller height. However, he didn’t address you like you were afraid he would. His eyes swept over to Neteyam, who watched him warily. “I didn’t know you had a pet.”
Neteyam’s chin inclined in your direction. “My friend has a name and is no pet.”
A Metkayina, who you didn’t realize was beside you, had crouched to touch your mask. “Does it bite?”
“Hey!” You jerked away from her. Who knew if she would try to rip your mask off. She was smaller than Neteyam but still much taller than you. In your attempt to get away from her, you backed into another Metkayina about your height, who pinched your arm. You yelped and Neteyam, quick as a whip, whirled around as you backed into his personal space to escape the touches.
His arm extended in front of you immediately, a sign to not touch. “Leave us alone.” He swiveled a hard stare at all of them before setting his hand on your shoulder. It was more so an attempt to ground himself than you. He didn’t want to resort to aggression unless they came any closer. “This isn’t a spectacle.”
“It’s a tiny alien.” Someone in the back laughed. “Do you not see how weird it is?”
Neteyam’s grip on your shoulder tightened a fraction. “You’re the weird ones. Go bother someone else.”
Another muttered in the background, “I’m surprised it knows our language.”
“It’s funny looking. Kind of ugly.”
When none of them would budge, a few muttering amongst themselves rather demeaning and hurtful things that you heard, Neteyam fixed their unofficial leader with a look. The boy challenged him with a narrow of his eyes but Neteyam squared his shoulders, muscles taut and ready to make a point. If it had to come down to aggression for your sake, Neteyam might disobey his father just once. You watched the wheels turn in the leader’s mind, weighing the worth of a fight over a dumb alien.
He scoffed and turned his head. “Whatever. It’s not worth it.”
He stepped back, gaining the attention of his group. They all copied him, edging away from you. Finally, you could breathe again, free from their invasive closeness. You took a step away from Neteyam, allowing him his space. He glanced at you out of the corner of his eye, keeping his body facing toward the group.
A high-pitched voice called your name. Turning on your heel, your eyes locked onto the frantic waving of Tuk. She stood on the other end of the shore, a distance away from you two. With her were Tsireya, Kiri, and Lo’ak, all of them in waist-deep water. Further from them, you spotted Tsireya’s brother, whose name you sort of forgot, and his friend on a pair of ilu. Tuk smiled and waved even more when she realized she had your attention. You waved back.
Neteyam gestured once with his head. “Come on. Let’s go.”
You took the lead. Neteyam walked two steps behind you, keeping a watchful eye on the group. They seemed to disperse into little clusters by then, all glancing your way every so often. Their not-so-quiet whispers fluttered your way, not kind by any means. The laughter that followed made your face turn sour.
Neteyam nudged you with his elbow. “Ignore them.”
When you’d reached your friends, Tuk looked past you at where the scene took place. “What was that about?”
Kiri shared a look with you. For her sister’s sake, she kept quiet. Lo’ak, however, frowned. Like his brother, he was contemptuous on your behalf.
“Didn’t look like a friendly meet-up,” he said.
Neteyam only shook his head at his brother.
Tsireya looked between all of you, a sad smile on her face. “Ignore them. They are merely curious, even if they handle themselves poorly. They’ll get used to you in time.”
Tuk bounced to get your attention back to her. “We are going to take our ilu for a ride. Do you want to join us?”
You put on a smile, trying to mimic her excitement. “Of course.”
Sure, you were one big spectacle and had to endure the staring, but it wouldn’t stop you from enjoying the beauty of the reef people. Everything was so new and different. You followed your friends deeper into the water as they called for their mounts, waiting for Neteyam to mount his ilu before you took your place behind him.
With an okay from you, everyone took off. You held tight to Neteyam as his ilu cut through the water at high speeds. Your head lay on his back as you tried to let go of your worries. All the things said about you, the weird stares, you let them roll off your back, leaving them behind in the water as the ilu swam on. If only it were as easy as swimming.
Some things just don’t sink. They resurface.
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If not accompanied by a Sully member or even hidden in the safety of their pod, you were subjected to prodding and teasing. Neteyam may have told them off (and Lo’ak may have been ready to get his hands dirty, if not for you latching onto him to keep his hands to himself) but that didn’t stop them when you were alone. You had no one to protect you, but you couldn’t be a burden and hide behind Neteyam forever. He had enough to worry about, you didn’t need to be another weight on his shoulders.
You wanted to understand, you really did. Looking from yourself to them, you were an outsider. At least the Sully family were Na’vi. You were human; smaller, not even blue, and you were physically weaker than even a young Na’vi. You were beyond different and that sort of thing prompted strong emotions. Curiosity, fear, hate. Given how other humans handled their time on Pandora, you couldn’t blame them.
But your being alone made you an easy target. Humans in great numbers were a threat. A single human, however, could not do much against the Na’vi. You had to deal with their nasty teasing and rudeness. It weighed heavy on your heart. Maybe you would leave with Norm when the time came.
“I thought I’d find you out here.”
You nearly sank underwater, losing your concentration momentarily. Turning your head, you foundNeteyam standing over where you floated. Of course, where the water was deep for you, it only reached his chest. You considered how he snuck up on you. Ripples of water calm and hardly disturbed, you imagined he’d adapted well to life on the reef.
You did a backstroke, putting a bit of distance between you. “What are you doing out here?”
“I could ask the same of you.” He inched further into the water, pushing up on his arms when he could no longer touch the floor. You continued to swim away from him slowly, but he still gravitated to you. “It’s late.”
“Your parents will freak when they find you missing.”
“Maybe.” He made a half attempt to shrug in the water. His eyes looked past you for a moment before he swam ahead, causing you to turn to keep an eye on him. “Want to see something?”
Neteyam waited no longer than three seconds, already knowing your answer. Taking one big breath, he dove underwater. You flipped onto your stomach, looking into the water with the protection of your exopack. There he was, swimming away from the shallows, deeper into the reef. That didn’t pull your attention though.
You’d seen it before, from the surface, but the bioluminescence of aquatic life stole your breath. Neteyam’s alien freckles glowed along his skin. He was one with the environment, looking all the more like he belonged. More than you, who probably looked like a human blob shape up on the surface. He flipped around and looked up at you, waving for you to come down. Even if you couldn’t glow in the dark, surrounding yourself with glowing fauna underwater seemed fun.
You inverted your body, cutting through the water with each stroke of your arms. Propelling toward Neteyam, you focused on the glow of his freckles as he floated in place watching you. When you neared, he continued down until you were both far enough from the shallow waters before floating listlessly on the ocean floor. You joined his side, close enough that you can speak.
“What-” A blur of color entered your peripheral and you flinched.
Your head snapped in its direction and a school of fish smaller than your hand swam past. Their bodies, striped in a glow of orange and purple, wiggled between you two to a destination only they knew. One’s eye lazily locks onto you before facing forward. You waved your hands through the water, using the movement to keep you in one place as you watched the fish.
Neteyam only smiled at you from the other side. When the school of fish had passed, he waved for you to follow once more. At a pace that you could keep to his side without much effort, he directed you past all sorts of bioluminescent flora and fauna.
Approaching a bed of anemones, you watched their tendrils sway gently. Undisturbed. One fish had dared to come out of the tendrils, only to dart back to its shelter at the sight of you. Even still, the tendrils danced to the rhythm of the sea, unbothered by your presence, unlike its small inhabitants.
You spun around to say something to Neteyam, only to find him missing. You twisted in a circle, confused. Daring to look up, a dark silhouette with white dots swam to the surface. You brought your arms over your head and propelled yourself up.
He remained above to catch his breath, kicking languidly to stay afloat. The movement of his tail appeared stiff in the water, you realized. It did not move on its own, but rather with the current of the water. When you’d gotten halfway up, he dove back down. Neteyam swam your way and you stopped. Except, he brushed past you with a wave.
You whirled around and down. “Wait, Neteyam.” Confusion laced your voice.
Your friend only looked over his shoulder before swimming on.
You huffed and repositioned yourself to hurry after him.
In your attempt to catch up to him, he swam faster. Despite him not being built for the water, you were even less equipped. Your arms and legs ached for a break, for which you attempted to get his attention. Just when you thought you had him, he slowed to turn around and face you.
“Finally,” you breathed out a little too early.
There was mirth in his eyes as he smiled toothily for a brief moment. Whatever he was about to do, you wanted no part of it. You shook your head. He nodded. You reached out to stop him but he swam in reverse. When you tried again, he swam around a large coral structure, momentarily putting it between you.
It became a game, him trying to keep away. You chased after him, kicking off sturdy coral and rocks for an advantage, but he’d managed to skim by every time, narrowly avoiding your clutches. The one time you’d reached out, barely grasping his tail. You hadn’t meant to, letting go the moment there was a pull. He whipped around and faced you with your hands up in surrender. Then, with his hands raised in warning, he slowly inched toward you. The nerves of the role reversal had a laugh bubble in your throat.
And so, you swam away from him. The aches were long forgotten, you’d frantically kicked and cut through the water to put distance between you two. You’d gone in circles, the reef now your obstacle course. A school of fish, larger than the ones before, swam at you. It’d been a mistake to stop and put your arms up in defense.
The group split in half and swam around you. Your moment of hesitation was more than enough for Neteyam to catch up. With another anxious laugh, you’d tried to swim away, but he’d grabbed you. He spun you widely to the side, earning a laugh once he’d let go. You floated to a stop, giggles lowering to silence.
Neteyam looked you in the eye. His face turned serious. You dropped your act too, brows now furrowed. It was then that you realized how much the exopack had suctioned to your face while underwater from the pressure.
“What’s wrong,” you asked.
He made a series of signs with his hands, not that you’d understand. Though, thanks to his short and simple lessons of what he knew, you picked up one word. Sad. The dots had connected in your mind. He was asking about earlier, how you’ve been just that after your arrival. Sad.
You denied it outright with a shake of your head. If you feigned ignorance, maybe this conversation wouldn’t have happened. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’m not sad.”
His head tilted with furrowed brows in a show of disbelief. He repeated that specific sign again with a firm nod. Sad. You are sad , was what you interpreted. And maybe he was right but you felt silly and lame about why. You open your mouth to deny again but are disrupted by a lone fish swimming past. It’s all alone.
You tear your gaze from the fish and sigh, sinking low until your feet touch down on some sea grass. It brought a shiver up your back but you didn’t care enough to move away. “Maybe I am sad, a little, but it’s nothing.” No, you thought to yourself, now that you started. It was something, something that affected you deeply. You frowned. “I’m different. I’m a human. Back home I have other humans and the clan is nice but here I’m looked down on and I feel so alone.”
You reached out and grabbed one of his hands for emphasis, holding it up beside your own. In doing so, you distracted yourself. Your eyes settled on the shape of his hand, the size of it compared to your own. Your voice grew quiet as you curled your fingers into your hand. “I wish I was like you. It’s hard being different. A completely different alien species. I don’t think I should stay here.”
Neteyam pulled his hand back and said more that you didn’t catch. You shook your head to tell him as such, catching the word ‘time.’ He had to have said something about them taking time to get to know you. To get used to you.
You bristled then. Time was indefinite and abstract. It could take weeks, months, or years. All thoughts of how the Metkayina thought of you warped your understanding of the Omaticayans and their kindness. Maybe they saw you as an animal too, like a wild pet. Maybe they liked the other humans but not you .
Neteyam lifted his hand and touched his fingers to his forehead. You lost focus, unattentive to his next move. Instead, you ranted, muttered, rambled a tangent of unkind thoughts, and connected dots that wouldn’t be there if you were in a rational state. You’d endured too much of the mean-spirited teasing.
You took to floating again, waving your limbs about to expel your anger as you ranted. In doing so, your body jerked suddenly. Something slimy wrapped around your ankle. You snapped your head down, finding that your kicking managed to get your foot tangled in seagrass. You thrashed your foot, unable to get it out.
Before you could fall into a self-afflicted rage, Neteyam touched your shoulder. He swam down and gently took hold of your ankle, effectively ceasing your kicking. Then, he tugged on the seagrass, ripping it off of you bit by bit. You watched as he did so, falling silent. By the time he freed your foot, you’d lost your anger, doused by the sounds of your exopack, the water, and the gentleness and care Neteyam regarded you with.
You locked eyes with him. He reached up for his forehead once again with a soft expression before he paused. His fingers touched his throat and he pointed up. He wanted to go up for air. You nodded and, this time swam up with him.
He breached the surface first. Your head popped up shortly after, the hiss of your exopack’s reserves undermined by the deep inhales Neteyam took. He blinked several times as he caught his breath, his ears flicking oddly. All the while he kept eye contact with you, a glint of emotion passing over his normally passive face.
Neteyam swam closer. He blurted breathlessly, “I see you.”
You froze, forgetting how to swim for a moment. Your head ducked underwater before your body went on autopilot, aching limbs propelling you up to the surface once again. Your eyes widened to the size of saucers. You heard him wrong.
“I see you,” he repeated firmly, confident in his own voice.
Your face underwent a myriad of emotions. Wide-eyed in disbelief to furrowing your brows. Face twisting and morphing until your expression softened. He saw you.
Hearing Neteyam say that removed all your woes. Sure, you still cared how the Metkayinans treated you but Neteyam managed to drive away most of your negative thoughts with three simple words. You floated with the water, and your body was more relaxed than your underwater tantrum. You were seen, difference and all, for better or worse. You had no need to be paranoid or vie for validation and acceptance by everyone when you had Nete.
You were seen . You were here before him, perceived with nothing but care. He accepted you and for that you trusted him. Closing your eyes, your cheeks pulled taut from your growing smile. “I am here,” you said. All of what you were stood, or floated, right before him, seen for the human you were and welcomed. He and his family had always and will forever welcome you as one of their own.
You opened your eyes feeling lighter than air, but not from the water. “Thank you, Nete. And I see you.”
You saw your differences. His blue skin, his height, all the physical discrepancies that made you unique. Different but not unwelcome.
Neteyam swam closer as he opened his mouth to say more, but a single clap made you both whip your heads.
Jake stood by the edge of the dock, staring down at you both. “What are you two doing out this late?” His voice carried that disciplinary undertone of a concerned father. “I thought something happened to you.”
Neteyam lowered his head in some form of a bow. “Sorry, sir.”
“Out of the water, both of you.” He shook his head.
Neteyam swam first. Following him, you two cut through the calm waters until you climbed up the dock. Jake stood waiting while you adjusted your exopack. Now that you were on the surface, its suction had become a bother for you. You loosened the straps of your mask by a hair, the suction now less abrasive to your skin.
The older Na’vi had you two walk in front of him back to the family pod. Until you and Neteyam were both in your respective hammocks, then he climbed into his own and turned his back to you. You flipped onto your side and shared a look with Neteyam. He gave a small smile before closing his eyes. You followed his example, falling asleep soon after.
In the morning, you would agree to the Sullys proposal. You wanted to stay with them.