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"Maki-san, what's your type?"
The question had been drowned out a bit by the music playing on the headphones, but Maki had heard it perfectly. However, she kept her eyes glued to the notebook, hoping that her friend would take the hint that she didn't want to be disturbed. Nobara tapped her arm after a second.
"Maki-san!" She called.
Sighing, Maki took off her headphones and the mellow music coming from them slowly faded into the air. "What?"
"What's your type?"
"Of what?"
"Men."
She blinked, confused. "I already told you."
"Yeah, but this is a different question," Nobara tilted her head forward with a smile. "What type of body in guys? Or girls, you know," she added quickly, batting her eyelashes innocently. "No judgment."
Knowing that her friend wouldn't drop the subject, Maki reflected on her answer.
"Skinny."
Nobara made a face. "Like a weakling?"
"Being skinny doesn't necessarily mean they're weak, Nobara." She said curtly, wanting to end the topic as soon as possible.
However, the girl seemed quite annoyed by her response seeing how her legs began to move restlessly, making their jointed desks shake with their rhythm.
"So you like them skinny."
"Yeah." Maki repeated, growing impatient.
"Skinny and scrawny."
She shrugged in response, putting the headphones back on. "I guess."
"So you like Okkotsu Yuuta."
Maki wiped her head in her direction so fast that one the earpiece of the headphones slipped out of her ear. "I don't." She growled, her mood ruined.
"You do."
"I don't."
"But you do, Maki-san!" Nobara crossed her arms, lips pursed in a pout. "You just described him!"
"I didn't ." she snarled, hands clenching the edge of her notebook because the image that had come to her head as soon as Nobara had clarified her question had been the one of Yuuta when he opened his Kendo uniform after they had finished practice and his undershirt clung to his body from all the sweat. Instead of backing away like a normal person would, Nobara remained stubborn.
"Okkotsu Yuuta is skinny!"
"Yuuta isn't skinny and scrawny anymore, you said it yourself."
The girl opened her mouth before closing it after a second, frowning in obvious irritation when the truth was thrown back at her. After a moment, Nobara narrowed her eyes suspiciously. "How do you know that he isn't skinny and scrawny anymore?"
With a sigh, Maki waved her hand. "Because we train together all the time in the club? Because you can't stop pointing out that he has built some muscle and isn't the depressed kid you knew from middle school?"
"But-"
"Yuuta isn't skinny anymore, so he isn't my type. Now cut it out." And she raised the volume of her music to tune out from the rest of the world.
By the corner of her eye Maki saw how Nobara pouted in annoyance, which turned her irritation into confusion. She knew of her friend's distaste for Yuuta because she was very open about it even if the latter was standing right next to them. Knowing that he wasn't her type of man shouldn't make Nobara react like that. Unless...
Maki removed her headphones. "Do you like Yuuta?"
The unholy screech the girl let out made her flinch in her chair.
"He isn't my type at all!" Nobara exclaimed, slamming her fist on the desk. "Never, ever say that again!"
"So why do you keep insisting that I like him? He's just my childhood friend."
If she was even more specific, Yuuta was the first friend she had made until highschool, but Nobara didn't need to know the specific details surrounding the circumstances of her life before she met Yuuta. As soon as those words were out of her mouth, Nobara gave her an incredulous look.
"You can't be serious, Maki-san."
"Of what?"
"You haven't noticed?"
Maki grew more impatient, her mood worsening by the second with the cryptic questioning. "Notice what?”
Nobara gasped, covering her mouth. "Oh my god, you haven't." She muttered in surprise, eyes twinkling. "You really haven't noticed!'
Fed up, Maki slammed her notebook shut, standing up to leave and Nobara immediately latched to her waist.
"I won't tell anyone, I swear! Besides, you don't have to worry about having competition!"
"What do you mean by that?!" Maki exclaimed, pushing her face away.
"He rejects all the confessions he gets!"
"Who?!"
"Okkotsu Yuuta!"
"And I care why?!"
"Because you like him!" Nobara yelled.
"I don't!" She yelled back. "And he doesn't like me!"
"Nah, he definitely does."
They both stopped struggling and looked to their right where their homeroom and physics teacher was giving them his usual goofy smile. Nobara was the first to react.
"Go away." She growled menacingly.
"Whaaaat, why?" Gojo sat down on the desk near them, completely ignoring the grimace they made at the same time. "I wanna know what's going on in the lives of my precious students!"
"That’s none of your business." Maki snapped as she began to put her things in her bag roughly.
"Of course it is, especially if it's about my dear cousin's love life!"
"Don't you have something else to do? Like grade our exams?"
Gojo waved his hand. "Already did that. You got an average score by the way. So," He rested his head on his palms with a dreamy smile. "I heard we're talking about boys~"
Nobara gagged.
"Gross! We're not telling you about our love life!"
"If you tell yours, I'll tell you mine."
"That's even worse!"
"What, I can't be a part of the gossip?"
"No!"
"Sure I can! Listen,” he pulled out a black and white picture from his shirt pocket and held it in front of them proudly. “We already found out the gender of the baby!" Gojo beamed. "It's a boy!"
Maki rolled her eyes and swung the backpack on her shoulder. "I genuinely hope that child comes out looking completely like Utahime-san."
Their teacher pressed his hands against his chest with a huge grin. "Nothing would make me happier. You should be happy as well, Maki. He will be your nephew if you and Yuuta get together!"
"We are not together!" She screamed and slammed the classroom door as she stormed out, ignoring Gojo's loud voice saying that she couldn't deny the obvious.
Fortunately, Nobara didn't chase after her and Maki's bad mood had subsided when she arrived at the dojo. Yuuta was already in full uniform when she walked in and as always, greeted her with an enthusiastic wave which she returned curtly before going to change. And as always, he waited for her outside the locker room with the rest of the protective gear, handing it over to her with a bright smile.
"Are we together again?" She asked.
"Yes."
"We've been training together for a month. Isn't that Geto-sensei's mistake?"
Yuuta looked down. "No, I think he does it more for the safety of the first years. You know, since the 'incident'"
Maki snorted. "It wasn’t on purpose."
"But you dented that helmet."
"I didn't expect them to be made of such poor quality," she argued back. "They should withstand thrusts."
Yuuta smiled. "I guess so, but since then, the first years have been afraid of you. You’re very strong after all, Maki."
Ba-bump.
There it was. For months now, every time Yuuta smiled at her like that, her heart would skip a beat and it was accompanied by a feeling of warmth that spread all over her body, but especially, to her cheeks. It made her uncomfortable.
"And you don't?" She inquired, ignoring how her fingertips began to tingle when their hands brushed briefly.
"No," Yuuta chuckled. "Not like you."
Ba-bump.
Maki stepped back and slammed her wooden sword into Yuuta's forehead, making him hiss in pain.
"Flattery won't get you anywhere. Let's go, beansprout."
The other nodded with a low groan before moving into position. Being the only second years in the dojo, Geto would leave them a reserved spot to practice away from the first years. Since they had been sparring partners for years, both of them already knew that they could go all out with each other without the worry of major injuries. Most of their sessions ended with even points, but lately she had been winning, especially when that heartbeat was triggered by Yuuta's closeness. It had to be a fight or flight response. They had agreed that the loser had to buy a drink from the vending machine, so Yuuta left the dojo with a pained face, rubbing his left arm after she struck him as hard as she could. After she removed the helmet, she noticed their teacher now stood up behind her with his enigmatic smile.
"You two make a great team." Geto commented.
Maki wiped the sweat from her neck without paying attention. "Yeah."
"You almost look like a couple."
Confused, Maki turned to look at him and the man smiled mischievously at her.
"Yeah, that's why we're teammates." She slowly answered as if it was more than obvious since he had assigned them like this at the beginning of the year.
A laugh erupted out of Geto, causing Maki to give him a strange look, as did Yuuta when he returned with her favorite drink. Geto patted him on the shoulder.
"Sorry, I tried."
Yuuta choked up and Maki noticed how his cheeks turned a deep red.
"Geto-sensei!"
"Good luck."
"Enough!"
But the adult laughed again and walked towards a bunch of first years who eyed them curiously.
"What did he mean by 'he tried'?" Maki inquired standing next to Yuuta, causing him to jolt.
"Nothing! Nothing at all! Forget what he said!"
"Why-"
"I forgot my drink, be right back!" and Yuuta hurried away after shoving the bottle into her hands, ignoring when she called out his name.
Puzzled, Maki watched him go before glaring at their teacher, who only waved his hands with a tiny grin in front of the terrified freshmen. It was enough to deal with Gojo being nosey in her life and Maki definitely didn't want his best friend also meddling as well. Both adults were inseparable, and her homeroom teacher had a bad habit of popping out of nowhere in the dojo to cheer Yuuta up. So it was no coincidence that Geto had 'tried' to do something to help him as well. Something was going on, and her bad mood returned again because she wasn't able to know exactly what it was.
Annoyed, Maki opened the bottle and when she raised it to her lips to drink it, she caught in the corner of her eye a hair of the same color as hers passing through one of the dojo's windows. Instinctively, she squeezed the bottle tightly, spilling its content all over the floor, and ignoring the startled gasp from the first years, Maki walked out of the building searching for the owner of that hair. There, not far from the vending machines, she saw the unmistakable silhouette of Mai. There were two other girls next to her that she vaguely remembered seeing together at lunch with her sister-a senior called Nishimiya and a nervous girl called Miwa who was on Mai's grade. They all formed a perfect semi-circle around Yuuta, who was clutching his drink looking extremely uncomfortable. Even if she couldn't hear what they were saying, the way his mouth twisted into a nervous smile meant that he was too polite to excuse himself from that conversation. Maki sighed deeply and started to walk over them to rescue him when suddenly Mai raised her hand and slapped him across the face. All her calm evaporated in that moment.
"What the fuck are you doing?"
Her words came out filled with enough rage to startle them all and her twin barely had time to put some distance between them to prevent her from crashing into her, breaking the circle her friends had made. Maki immediately stood in front of Yuuta, whose cheek began to redden. As always, Mai took a few seconds to find the right words to attack, crossing her arms in a pissy way.
"None of your business."
"It is my fucking business if you're picking on people like a cheap copy of a mean girl."
That was a lot about her sister's reputation. Queen Bee. Mean Girl. A Bitch. Nobara hated her guts and never failed to remark that they were so, so different. Mai, with her expensive accessories, tailored uniform and private car to drive her around. Maki, who wore band-aids, defeated the school's delinquents and used headphones on breaks to tune out unpleasant memories. They were so different and yet, it was like looking into a mirror whose eyes were filled with pure hate and contempt.
"If anyone is a cheap copy, it's you." Mai spat.
Maki scoffed.
"Please, I'm the oldest. Everyone knows that anything you do it's a stupid competition you seem to have against me."
Red stained her sister's cheeks, her gaze quivering with shame. The third year immediately jumped between them like an angry cat with its tail bristled.
"Don't be mean to Mai-chan!"
"Oh, so when she hits people you don't bat an eye, but I hurt her tiny pride and suddenly I'm the bad guy?" Maki loomed over the blonde girl. "I'm not afraid to kick your sorry-ass, Shorty."
Nishimiya gasped loudly and Maki turned to glare at the blue haired girl, who squealed frightened and backed away trembling. However, as soon as she clenched her fist, Yuuta grabbed her arm and pulled her away.
"Maki, I'm fine. Please drop it."
She turned to look at him with a murderous glare but his gray eyes were serene, eyes narrowed with worry for her. It was typical of him to avoid conflict since they were children and he always stopped her from allowing her rage to get the better of her. His grip was firm, but gentle, coaxing Maki to breathe deeply and let go of her anger.
"Let's go." She said before bumping her shoulder roughly with Mai as she tugged on Yuuta's hand.
"Why the fuck you do keep him around?" Mai sneered, a cruel smile on her face, but Maki noticed how her eyes were fixed on their clasped hands. "Are you that desperate for a dog?"
"At least Yuuta is loyal," She replied calmly, barely glancing in her direction. "Unlike some people."
Mai knew the meaning behind those words because hurt flashed through those same golden eyes as hers and Yuuta tightened his grip on her hand.
"Maki, stop it. She's your sister."
"That doesn't justify her for being a jerk."
"I know," he tugged on her hand. "But Please, stop."
He knew that she wouldn't stop. She could be cruel and ruthless because no matter how many years had passed, Maki would never forget it was Mai who let go of her hand when Toji came for them at the gates of the Zenin mansion. She would never forget that she chose the lavish life the Zenin offered over being together. Over the years, Maki had learned how to cut with her words, leaving deep and oozing wounds that had left Mai crying more than once. And only Yuuta knew that after that damage was done, those wounds were also reflected in her body, perhaps even deeper than her twin's.
"Let's go." He begged softly, brushing his thumb over knuckles.
The anger inside her finally quelled and Maki began to walk away with him not before Mai's rage reached her ears.
"Oh my god, you seriously don't see it?"
"See what?" She growled back, noticing the disgust written all over Mai's face as her eyes finally moved away from their locked hands.
"Nothing. I simply can't wait for the moment everything comes crashing down on you. I hope it burns."
With one last glare in Yuuta's direction, Mai turned on her heels and walked away followed by the other two girls. Normally her sister's words would have left a strange emptiness in her chest, but this time Maki starred in the direction she had disappeared with nothing but the same confusion she had felt all day.
"What did she mean by that?" She looked at Yuuta. "Why did she slap you?"
Yuuta, who had been calm through all the tension, suddenly became flustered. His lips stretched into a nervous giggle.
"I, uh, I don't know..."
"Yuuta."
"It's fine, really! It didn't hurt."
"Your cheek is all red," she leaned closer. "Tell me what you guys talked about."
Again, Yuuta's eyes avoided hers. "It's nothing, I swear."
“Yuuta.”
“She asked me if you and I were close.” He blurted out.
She stopped in her tracks.
“That’s it?”
That had made Mai slap him with such rage that now there was a clear mark of her hand on his cheek?
“Uhu…”
“Well,” she hesitated to find the right words. “Of course we’re close. I like spending time with you.” Maki grabbed his face firmly, drawing a surprised gasp from Yuuta. “You’re my friend.”
Carefully, she turned his face to see the red mark on his cheek, touching it with her fingertips. Even if he groaned, Yuuta instinctively rubbed his cheek against her palm, frowned slightly at the sensation until his expression softened, no doubt getting used to it, and he leaned fully into her hand.
Ba-bump.
Maki pushed at his face with enough force to make him stagger. "Come on, we're already late for that gremlin."
He quickly nodded, running inside the dojo to change. She followed him shortly after, completely ignoring Geto's giggle on her way to the locker room.
All the way, it was Yuuta who filled the silence between them with small talk that she didn't have to respond to, just listen. He knew the effect of meeting Mai had on her, so he gave her time to deal with her thoughts, continuing to talk about his day, his classes and his family, all while the same thought ran through Maki's head over and over.
Why had Mai followed her there?
Although she could afford a private school, her twin had come to the public school where she and Yuuta had passed the exam together; where they arrived together on the same train, on the same route everyday; where they met on the same corner of the neighborhood since who was eight years old to walk to the same train station.TAll of this they done together since she had left her family and gone to live with Toji, the man who was known as the black sheep of the Zenin family and yet, he possessed something Maki desired the most.
Freedom.
And one day, she had managed to get his contact information from Naobito's desk and took the train alone to meet him in the neighborhood where he allegedly lived with his wife and infant son, except that his wife had passed away years ago, her nephew was only a year younger than her, and it was clear Toji didn't want anything to do with a Zenin spawn since he slammed the door in her face as soon as she told him who she was.
By night time it was obvious no one would open the door again and for a brief moment as she sat in the street, Maki considered turning back the way she had come until a shadow covered the dim light coming from the house and Yuuta's chubby face loomed over hers with eyes full of curiosity.
Maki would later find out that Toji was the neighbor no one wanted to talk to due to his menacing aura and the scar on his lips. It didn't help that he had also joked with everyone that they shouldn't ask what he did for a living, and it didn't help that Megumi added that Toji's job was to "disappear people ''. Even if he claimed that he had "retired", the damage was done and no one came near his house except for little Yuuta once he saw her all alone on the sidewalk of the street. Needless to say, Yuuta's mother had given Toji a full ear that left him frowning and pissed off, but begrudgingly let her into the house where Megumi already had lukewarm milk for her in a cup with a dog painted. It turned out that he had attempted to let her in multiple times only to be stopped by his father since he thought it was a trap from the family he had left years ago. That she was there to take them back.
She wasn't, and Toji was mildly amused when he heard how she managed to escape the guards and get there by herself.
"But I don't know what you want me to do for you, kid. I don't do that kind of work anymore."
Maki didn't ask, but it was obvious that a normal job wouldn't be enough to provide for his little family if he was "retired" since the house was big and she had noticed the guns hidden in nifty places. From their own family experience, they both knew better than to ask questions to which they knew the answers. So when he had asked her to leave, she had refused and stood her ground as the adult glared threateningly. Maki promised she wouldn't disturb the peace in their little house in their normal little neighborhood if Toji let her stay there. She calmly reminded him that he had no other option since Yuuta's mother was watching him like a hawk. And instead of grabbing her by the throat and throwing her out into the street like someone else would have done, he had complied with her request after a tense silence.
"But remember, girl. You're still Zenin, and they'll come for you sooner or later."
Maki knew, but she didn't care. She was just elated to finally have her own moment of freedom away from that house, its rules, her mother, her father, her hateful cousin, and simply be herself in a normal house, in a normal neighborhood. However, she quickly saw that it was quite lonely when she and Megumi went to the park to play. He explained that the parents had warned their children to stay away from them because they're "odd and dangerous", so those first few days it was only them playing alone in the sandbox; there wasn't much difference when she played with Mai in the backyard of the mansion.
That was until Yuuta arrived, at least by her retelling. Megumi, on the other hand, proclaimed that the scrawny kid had no other choice to join them after she beat up his bullies mercilessly and Yuuta was too scared to move from his place after she reached out her hand to help him up. According to him, she basically dragged him around the park saying that he was a skinny weakling, "no wonder why they pick on you", and the poor kid was trembling from head to toe as she began to teach him how to throw a punch.
"You basically adopted him as an extrovert with an introvert."
That comment never failed to make Maki hurl the nearest object she had at hand at his face.
She hadn't "adopted" Yuuta.
She simply saw a scrawny kid who was scared of everyone and everything and who had helped her when she was alone. To her, Yuuta was someone who wasn't afraid to show his emotions or weakness like she had been taught all her life. He was easy to read like an open book and most important of all was, he smiled.
It was a big smile, with all his teeth and a light blush on his chubby cheeks.
He had always made it so bright, and she had been attracted to it like a sunflower to the warmth of the sun. Maki would never forget the day she met Yuuta because for the first time in her life she felt truly alive by his side. She wasn't the "young miss" to him; he wasn't looking up her birth rank to see if she saw worth speaking to; he didn't look down on her for being a girl.
He didn't wish she hadn't been born.
There was no pain, no coldness, no glares, no hate.
For a child like her who had been raised in what could be called hell on earth, meeting him on that street while running away from that house was happiest memory of her childhood because she learned there was colorful world full of laughter and the occasional crying, like when Yuuta stumbled on the ground and scraped his knee. At that tender age, she had gripped his hand and refused to let go because she didn't want to return to the miserable life she had known before.
But the Zenin knew no mercy.
Toji had left the clan until he came of age and was able to have Megumi with him since he was legally his child. But she was a cousin and the time she could spend in their house was limited. It didn't matter how amused Naobito was with her ability to bypass the security of the mansion, making a fool of the guards; Maki had to return to the clan and leave Yuuta behind.
That was until Toji did a job.
She never asked him for the details, and he never told her exactly what he had done. All Maki needed to know was that he had bought his and his sister's freedom. However, it was only Maki who emerged from the main entrance of the Zenin house holding a cardboard box with what she could call her own. Toji didn’t ask for an explanation and she hadn't given it to him. He simply took the box and they both took the train to the house she would call home from now on, the place where Yuuta was waiting for her with a bright smile on his chubby face.
Over the years, that smile had prevailed, but the baby fat hadn't. It had been lost as he grew taller than she could have thought, and now the Yuuta that smiled at her couldn't even be called skinny and scrawny anymore. After middle school, he had joined the Kendo club with her and worked hard to climb the ranks. He trained, ran, practiced thrusting and swung his wooden sword over and over until his body became almost irreconcilable, at least by Nobara's standards. But no matter how much Yuuta changed, he was still that nervous beansprout who fumbled with his words when he was uncomfortable or overly excited. Maki arched her eyebrow seeing that he was shifting his weight from one leg to another as they waited outside the building for all the kids to come out. She glanced inside through the glass doors and then at him.
"Wanna go to the bathroom?"
Yuuta jumped in place, startled.
"Because I don't think Utahime-sensei wouldn't mind." She clarified.
"No!" Yuuta exclaimed with a high pitched voice. "I'm fine!"
He clearly wasn't and Maki frowned, annoyed.
"Go before the gremlin comes out. She'll want you to carry her to the playground."
"I-"
She heard a war cry and from the direction of Yuuta's frightened gaze, she knew immediately what to do. Maki took a step to her right and a blue blur with brown hair flew past her. Quickly, she managed to nab the back of the paint-smeared blue dress and Rika let out a cry of outrage as she was held above the ground like a fussing cat.
"Stop always dodging me!" She yelled, kicking angrily.
Maki shrugged. "It's not my fault you're so loud, brat."
"I'm not a brat, I'm a lady! Yuuta!" Rika's furious scowl instantly turned into a teary pout. "Say something!"
The other made a plaintive sound that made Maki roll her eyes. Sometimes Yuuta was so easily manipulated that it was worrying. She gave Rika one last shake and set her down roughly.
"Have manners and say goodbye to Utahime-san."
Huffing, Rika straightened her dress before turning around with a beaming smile.
"Bye, Utahime-sensei!" She waved her hand excitedly. "Bye-bye, baby!"
At the door, the woman smiled sweetly at them as she waved her hand, the other placed protectively on her belly. Maki and Yuuta waved back. Maki never fully understood how Gojo was able to marry a woman like Utahime. He proclaimed that she had painted a giant portrait of him as a symbol of their love, and it hung in their living room for everyone to see. She really doubted the veracity of his words, even though Yuuta claimed that it did exist and Utahime had painted it in college when asked to reflect her happiness; Maki had laughed so hard she had coughed. In her opinion, Utahime was too good for a man like Gojo and too patient to teach a bunch of hyperactive children like Rika to paint while seven months pregnant. If it was her, she would have thrown them out a window.
Rika rummaged in her bag and extended a piece of paper towards Yuuta with a big smile. He took it and made a tender noise at the drawing of a disproportionate castle with a princess in a navy blue dress and a man with a glittery face.
"I'm your princess!" She exclaimed happily.
"That's very cute Rika-chan. But where is Maki? You didn't draw her?"
And without missing a beat, Rika pointed to what appeared to be a skeleton locked in a crooked dungeon at the back of the castle. Maki grabbed the girl's cheeks and pulled as hard as she could..
"Argh! Yuuta, save me!" Rika yelled and Yuuta quickly moved Maki away.
As predicted, the gremlin demanded that Yuuta carry her, and halfway through the park, she changed her mind and bolted as fast as she could, forcing Maki to run after her to prevent Rika from almost getting run over like the last time she was left without supervision. After months of caring for her, they had discovered that it was better to look after her outdoors instead of locking her in one of their houses trying to get her to do homework. They had to place her between them on the bench to prevent her from slipping away, and make sure she finished everything before letting her run free and playing in the park as much as she wanted while they studied.
At school Maki used to use her headphones because the murmur of the people passing around her reminded her of the cruel voices that used to whisper in the corridors of the Zenin mansion. But with Yuuta, she didn't need to tune out the world and everything around her because being with him was enough to keep those memories at bay. Another reason was because that way she could hear whenever Rika decided to bully some random poor kid and she had to stand up to stop her. As her hand slid across the paper taking notes, she peered in Yuuta's direction and realized that his eyes were locked on her.
"What?"
He jolted in his seat, quickly glancing down.
"Nothing." He mumbled.
"You just don't stare at me for God knows how long. Do I have something in my face?"
"No," he fumbled.
"Then what?" She said, tapping her pen impatiently on the table.
"It's just...I saw..." Yuuta's eyes sheepishly met hers and that was when Maki saw how red his face was. "The sun makes your hair shine like emeralds."
The tapping stopped. A part of her wanted to laugh out loud because that was so fucking corny . The other was overcome by the shock, the realization of what his words meant and the tingling sensation that ran through her body like an electric shock because holy crap , Yuuta had said those words to her. Heat rose from her stomach and spread across her face, words struggling to form in her mind so she could conjure up a response, anything, something to break their eye contact. A head popped between them.
"I'm hungry." Rika loudly announced with a frown.
Inadvertently, Maki slammed her pen on the table and Yuuta quickly got up, muttering that he had a couple of cookies stowed away in his bag. Rika didn't say anything and simply watched their movements carefully until Maki gave her the lid of the thermos full of soup that she had packed that morning. She made a disgusted face.
"Miso soup again?"
"It's part of a healthy diet."
"We eat it all the time! I want hamburgers!"
"Stop being so spoiled."
Rika pouted and looked to the side. "I bet we eat this all the time because you don't know how to cook other things."
The child emitted an angry cry when Maki pinched both of her cheeks and pulled. Yuuta remained by their side holding an open pack of cookies, giving a nervous smile at the parents who passed next to their bench giving them strange looks. After she thought it was enough, Maki released her and Rika ran behind Yuuta, hissing. He placed a hand on her head chuckling before reminding her that she should be thankful for the food she had. He looked at Maki and his gaze became nervous but determined as he spoke.
"I would mind eating your miso soup every morning."
She frowned.
"I know how to cook other stuff, jerk."
Yuuta flinched. "No, I didn't mean that... "
Behind him Rika began to laugh.
"Yuuta agrees that Maki's miso soup is yucky!"
"No, I don't!" He yelled, hands raised when Maki advanced menacingly. "I don't!"
Both screamed as she loomed closer. When the sun began to set and the playground was tinted in nostalgic yellow, Rika returned to their side with droopy eyes and yawned as they packed up their things.
"Up." She muttered sleepily.
Unlike other kids, Rika didn't make grabby hands. She simply tried to climb someone's body like a tree and rested her head on the crook of their neck, fully expecting that they would comply with her wishes of being carried home. She managed to use the bench as an momentum and Maki quickly caught her when she slammed against her chest with a thud. Groaning softly, Rika eased into the embrace, resting her cheek on her shoulder. Maki grumbled but Yuuta gave them a caring smile, carrying the girl's bag as they walked through the street. As the sun set, the lights began to come on and Maki saw a girl her age open the door of a house with a happy 'I'm home!' and greeted with a 'Welcome back!' . She must have stared longer than usual because Yuuta's question almost made her drop Rika.
"Do you miss your home?"
She knew he wasn't referring to Toji's house. He meant her old 'home', the place she hadn't been there for years and was never allowed to return to.
"No," she replied coldly. "Would you miss being yelled at for every little mistake you make or having old men roaming around your house carrying guns?"
No, Maki would never miss that place where violence and hate were present every day of her life. Where being a woman was considered to be the lowest of the low, that she and Mai were only meant to be pretty and quiet. She didn't look, but it was obvious Yuuta was taken aback.
"No..."
"Exactly."
"I-I'm sorry!" He stammered with obvious panic. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable, I-I shouldn't have asked that-"
"You asked the wrong question," she cut him off, noticing how Rika's arms closed around her neck in a tight grip as they stopped in front of her house. "You meant to ask me if I miss Mai."
Whatever answer Yuuta wanted to say was cut off when the door swung open. Rika's grandmother's eyes were filled with hate as she looked at the girl in Maki's arms; a hate Maki was too familiar with. She could almost swear she was looking at her own mother at that moment and not the woman who paid them to keep her grandchild away from her for as long as possible under the guise of babysitting.
'I wish you had never been born.'
'Why can't you be like Mai?'
'Never show your face in this house again. You’re no longer my daughter.'
"Rika, get inside now."
But the grip around Maki's neck tightened, nearly taking her breath away. Rika hid her face further into her shoulder and refused to move. She didn't say anything and Maki knew she wouldn't open her mouth.
"Rika." The old woman said, a clear warning behind those words.
The hate, the despise in that voice shouldn't bring memories she'd tried to bury over the years. A few seconds passed and Maki felt the grip around her body loosen. Instead of putting Rika down, she placed her arm behind her back, giving it a light squeeze.
"Orimoto-san, Rika says she wants to stay at my house again tonight. Do you mind?"
The child in her arms immediately nodded without turning her head. If possible, she clung tighter, rubbing her head against her body like a cat scenting its owner. Maki kept a straight face the entire time, watching as the old woman's mouth twisted in disgust.
"No." She finally said, slamming the door shut.
Maki felt how Rika's entire body relaxed with the noise that would have normally alarmed any other child. She looked around with big, innocent eyes, making sure there were no grown-ups around and rested her full weight on Maki, gripping her blouse as a hand ran up and down her back.
"What a bitch."
Yuuta gasped loudly. "Maki!"
"What?"
"You can't say that around Rika!" He exclaimed.
"Oh excuse me. I meant a bitter old hag."
Rika gave them a mischievous smile that turned into an excited shriek when Maki blew a raspberry on her cheek, causing her to laugh out loud and kick her feet happily. Grinning, Maki bent forward and once she made sure Rika had a strong grip around her neck, she opened her arms, letting her dangle. The girl yelled, tears in the corner of her eyes.
"Yuuta!"
"Maki!"
"Jeez, relax," she straightened up, rubbing her back. "You're such a scaredy-cat."
At her pout, Maki stuck out her tongue and Yuuta laughed nervously. The walk to her home was quiet, filled with the pleasant sound of crickets lurking in the gardens along with the occasional stray cat that Rika made sure to point out with a huge smile. Even if he had seen it from miles away, Yuuta made sure to gasp and congratulate her on her excellent vision, causing her to squeal happily. At that moment Maki decided to answer his question.
"I do miss Mai."
She missed her so much sometimes it hurt enough to make her look up for her number on her contact list. Her fingers hovered over it as she tried to decide what to write that was enough to rebuild that bridge that had burned years ago. And the memory of Mai willingly abandoning her for a nice life filled with luxuries made her blood boil so much she would stop herself from making a stupid decision.
It wasn't fair she still missed her after all those years.
It wasn't fair.
It wasn't fair.
It wasn't fair but that was the life they'd both chosen, there was nothing to gain resenting the past.
"I'm sorry-"
"I miss Mai," she interrupted him. "But this little gremlin won't let me feel alone half the time." Grinning from ear to ear, Rika made a tiny sound and nuzzled their cheeks together before Maki pushed her face away, muffling her scream. "She made her choice, I made mine. Besides, living with Toji and Megumi isn't bad if you exclude the knives."
Yuuta looked at her frightened. "The knives?"
"I never said anything about knives." She said innocently, ignoring his panicked look.
As soon as they stood outside her house, Yuuta strategically hid behind the fence. Before, Toji was pretty lax when he came over, not caring if his parents had given him permission or if he ate whatever food they had in the fridge. Yuuta, like the good boy he was, had always greeted him politely and as a good gesture, often brought some casserole that his mother had made. That was good enough for Toji to let him spend the night, not caring if he and Maki shared the same futon, even if the one that Mai would have used was stored up on the shelf. However, it was around the time they both entered middle school that Toji had strictly forbidden them from sharing a bed.
"He sleeps on the couch or in Megumi's room."
"Why?"
Toji crossed his arms. "Because it's my fucking house and my fucking rules."
Needless to say, Megumi wasn't too keen on sharing his room, so the sleepovers came to an end as Yuuta didn't want to make him uncomfortable. And over the years Toji's sudden antagonism towards Yuuta became more apparent to the point he had almost come out a couple of times holding a knife or any other weapon he had hidden around the house to greet him at the entrance. Thankfully, Megumi had stopped him before the neighbors saw him. Instead of saying goodnight like he always did, Yuuta tugged on the sleeve of her cardigan, stopping her. Maki raised her eyebrow, but he didn't let go.
"Rika-chan, I need to tell Maki something, okay?"
Normally Rika would have fussed, hating to be left out when it was just the two of them. However, the girl nodded and climbed down from Maki's grasp, spreading her arms with a beaming smile.
"Kiss me goodnight."
Smiling, Yuuta knelt down and kissed her forehead, earning a giggle before she ran to the door and knocked incessantly until it opened.
"Hello, Stable Income." Maki heard Toji say mockingly, followed by Rika's voice deprived of its usual childish tone.
"I'm staying tonight. I want cereal." She demanded, which made Toji scoff.
"If your granny didn't pay so well I would have kicked you out by now. Where's Maki?"
"Talking to Yuuta. They're being gross."
Strangely, there was no answer and the door closed. Yuuta visibly relaxed, signing with relief as soon as Toji's silhouette moved from the window. Maki couldn't help but to laugh.
"He's not going to hurt, you know."
He gave her a sidelong glance.
"I kinda disagree with that."
She scoffed and rested her hand on her hip. "So what did you want to talk about?"
Deep down, she shouldn't feel nervous. After all, it wasn't the first time Yuuta had reached out to grab both of her hands. However, the moment their skin touched, Maki knew that this was a different kind of gripping and her heart began to race, causing that familiar tingle to run through her body again. Yuuta stroked the back of her hand with his thumb and leaned into her, eyes shining and filled with affection.
"I would eat your home cooking for the rest of my life."
Maki's heart instantly plummeted and her mood turned sour.
"For fuck's sake Yuuta, I get it." She released his hands, angry. " I'll try to get better at cooking miso soup, no need to rub it in my face all the time."
Yuuta's face stiffened.
"No, that's not it..."
"Also, it's not like you're a gourmet chef either. I've eaten your soup and it's not better than mine."
"No, Maki-"
"You add too much soy sauce and-"
"This has nothing to do with our cooking!" He yelled, cutting her off. Taken aback, Maki stood silent and gasped when he grabbed her arms, pulling them closer. "Maki," Yuuta took a deep breath and moved closer. "I-"
The sound of a gun cocking cut him off.
"Hey, kid," Toji greeted from the doorway, smirking as he held a shotgun. "Why don't you come inside so we can have a nice conversation?"
Perhaps the only reason Yuuta didn't faint in that moment was because Maki quickly yanked him behind her.
"Enough." She snarled at the man, who tilted his head innocently as if he wasn't holding a weapon.
"What?" Toji asked. "I simply want to get to know him better than I did before."
"Cut it out, asshole!"
"I-I think I should go..." Yuuta managed to utter, trembling from head to toe. "I-I'll come for you tomorrow-"
The man pointed the shotgun at him. "Come near my house again and I'll shoot you."
"HEY!" Maki yelled but Toji's smirk only grew wider.
"One...two.."
"Maki!" Yuuta grabbed her by the arms and spun her around, holding her tight. Even if there was fear in his eyes, a fierce determination was bigger. "The moon is beautiful tonight!"
She blinked, looked up and then back at him, utterly confused. "It's cloudy."
If it was possible, she clearly saw how something broke inside Yuuta as soon as she finished those words. He stared at her in silent shock, before quickly squeezing her body in a hug and running off as fast as he could with his face red as a tomato. Maki was silent, unable to comprehend what had happened until Toji's whistle interrupted her train of thoughts.
"I hadn't heard that shit in a long time."
She snapped her head. "You fucking asshole."
"What?"
"Why the fuck would you come out of the house with a fucking gun?!"
The man shrugged. "I don't have to explain myself to you. Besides, you should be more concerned about what that brat said to you."
"What, that the moon that I can't see is beautiful?"
Toji covered his mouth. "Oh my god, you just don't get it, do you?"
"Get what?!" She snarled, impatient.
"Oh my, that poor bastard. I don't think I need to shoot him anymore, you've already killed him inside. Even I know what those words mean."
Maki clenched her fists, blushing with anger and embarrassment.
"Because you're old."
The man frowned. "Fuck you, I'm still at an acceptable age."
"Whatever, boomer!"
As soon as she tried to go past him, Toji slapped the top of her head playfully. "Look up some old confessions and maybe that little desiccated brain of yours might finally understand."
Furious, Maki punched him in the stomach and the man elbowed her hard enough to open the door when she hit it, causing Rika to crash into her legs, knocking them against Toji.
"Maki!" the girl cried pitifully. "Megumi won't let me pet his doggies!"
Behind her, she saw how both dogs had taken refuge behind their owner, who had his arms crossed with an irritated look.
"She pulls their ears too hard."
"Don't pull their ears!" The girl argued back.
"You do."
Rika gasped as if that was the biggest offense Megumi could have said, making Maki roll her eyes.
"Stop whining so much, you're not five."
Oh, but Rika loved acting like one. She loved to run, play and cling to her. She loved taking her phone and talking to Yuuta about her day at school. She loved making a fuss about taking a bath and then insisting that she wasn't a child that needed her hair to be washed by someone else. She loved being pampered, lying on her body as they watched movies next to Megumi's dogs with a smile on her face because she knew she was loved in that house just like Maki. There were no beatings, no yelling, no suffering they had known before; there, in that house, there was the normal family life they had always wished for.
"Get in bed!"
"No!"
"Get in bed now, brat!"
"NO!"
"Be quiet already!" Megumi yelled from the other side of the wall.
"Stop screaming in my house, the neighbors are going to call the police!" Toji yelled from downstairs.
Gleefully, Rika tried to run past Maki, who caught her and managed to get her in the sheets, a difficult task because she kept struggling, laughing and kicking on purpose. Once she was tucked in, she bawled some more and spread her hands out with eyes full of innocence.
"Hug!"
Maki glared at her, brushing aside her lock of hair that had stuck to her cheek in the struggle. "I'm not your mother."
There was a moment of silence and the expression of innocence vanished in a second.
"I'll scream and cry and the police are going to find all the stuff in your house if you don't hug me."
The worst part was that Maki instantly knew the threat was real. Rika made a big fuss after she reluctantly hugged her, snuggling up with an excited squeal before relaxing completely, a peaceful smile on her face after getting what she wanted. She was going to grow up into an entitled brat if she didn't fix that. Maki sighed tired and managed to find a comfortable position before she began to scroll through her phone. Half an hour later, Rika's raspy and sleepy voice was heard.
"Do you like Yuuta?"
Maki rubbed her eyes, the screen light reflected on her eyelids. "Of course I do, why?"
"I like him too."
"Yeah, we all know that. Go to sleep already."
She turned off her phone and covered their bodies with the blanket, closing her eyes to end the conversation. In the darkness, Rika's hand found hers and gripped it tightly.
"But I like you guys together better.”
Maki frowned, confused. “Okay?"
"If you are together, Yuuta would be my dad and you would be my momma."
"I already told you, I'm not your mother."
In the dim light in the room, she managed to make out Rika's shrug and could clearly imagine her mischievous smile.
"Momma."
Maki grabbed a pillow and hit her face with it.
"I'm gonna kick you out the bed, I swear to God."
The child whined and curled up angrily, acting all offended even though she was still clinging to her hand. Half an hour later she was fast asleep, but Maki wasn't. She lay awake, staring at her ceiling.
Did Rika look at them like father and mother instead of her babysitters?
She could.
She might.
Maybe they had transformed into that the day Yuuta pulled her away at the last minute from that truck that was about to run her over and she clung to both of them, gasping for air. Rika had remained silent before starting to cry, prompting Yuuta to hold her in his arms, cooing softly while also asking Maki if she was alright because she had scraped her knee on the ground when she pulled them off the street. She was fine. He was fine. Rika was fine and cried harder when Maki screamed at her for being so careless. From then on, they had become the family she lost long ago, and whose grandmother never stopped blaming her for it.
A family. They did kinda look like one if they both held one of Rika's hands as they walked together by the lake in one of the larger parks they took her once in a while. The gremlin had seen a couple of parents do that to their children and demanded for them to do the same. She grunted at the ridiculous request, but begrudgingly agreed. Yuuta had even indulged Rika by swinging her off the ground, making her squeal happily.
A family. If Rika was the daughter, then she and Yuuta would be-
"Fuck," she cursed out loud and sat up on her bed, causing Rika to stir in her sleep.
Uncomfortable, Maki placed a hand on her chest, feeling theloud and quick thumping of her heart.
Ba-bump, ba-bump, ba-bump.
Yuuta shouldn't make her feel like this. He shouldn't, but…
"Fuck," she groaned again, rubbing her hands over her face as she tried to ignore her beating heart at the memory of Yuuta and his stupid smile.
And then she remembered the words he had used.
Eating her miso soup even if it tasted bland, or how the moon looked lovely even if it was cloudy. They didn't make any sense, and yet Toji pointed out that even he knew their meaning. Gripping her phone, Maki began to type what Yuuta had said and was surprised to see the auto filler finish that exact sentence for her. She quickly pressed the first option that answered its meaning and her breathing stopped shortly before she screamed at the top of her lungs, throwing her phone against the wall and causing Rika to jerk awake. One of the dogs began to whimper loudly and it was followed by Megumi's voice yelling if everything was okay.
No, nothing was okay.
Nothing was okay because finally, she finally understood why her heart raced like that everytime Yuuta came closer, why that tingling ran through her body everytime their hands touched, why she felt calm and safe next to him, why she didn't need to tune out the world by his side, why she felt so happy ever since they were children and both held each other's hands. The answer had been there all along, after so many years.
“The moon is beautiful, isn’t it?” This phrase is a more poetic way of saying I love you.