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If the multiverse existed you doubt the two of you would always be together. The possibilities are endless and you're a curious being. What are the chances that in a different world you don't love him? What are the chances you would hate eachother's guts? Thoughts swarmed around your human mind but then you decided it's best to just brush it off. Not today. Not tonight. Not when you're in his arms.
Is it beautiful, how there are endless possibilities of... just how the core of each and every being could become by absorbing the world it's in? And how amazing it is that in this exact time, this exact universe, yours and his worked out. he's breathing next to you. How did two souls entwined and tried to morph itself so that they could embrace eachother, not in the jigsaw puzzle way but in a way that you finally see that, this is what I'm willing to sacrifice part of my lifetime for. That love makes you feel things again. That you smiled like a fool when you think of your lover. That you finally made peace with your used-to-be nonexistent self esteem and trusted yourself when you told yourself that "this guys loves me. he really does." Because that's the truth. You let him in then he helped you open up to yourself and accepts parts of you. Oh...
Oh.
How over the moon you were when you truly felt that he loved you as you are and not because he pitied you! And how wide of a grin was plastered on his face when you said you believed him that he loves you. That lurking insecurity that messes in your kind in your happiest moments, it did shut the hell up this time. that bit of anxiety did leave your subconscious and you felt so free when you thought of it again afterwards. It made you felt unstoppable.
And that's just one of the many miracles you witnessed. You exhaled heavily. Uou tend to think a lot when you're feeling comfortable, maybe in the shower, alone in your bed after you spaced out a bit, this time cuddling with him. You slowly crawled out of your thought bubble and reconnect to the things around you, let's start with Porco. There's the sleepy, hazy eyes that signifies he is not only sleepy but also feeling comfortable. and his no longer furrowing brows, the blurry fine lines on his forehead, his out-of the-shower locks everywhere. moving your eyes to his temple, down to the cheekbones, noses then lips slightly opening. He is a piece of art breathing.
then you closes your eyes, stimulating other senses. Your skin feel his warmth and his breathing, and the weight of arms around you, legs that tangle with yours. Your nostrils breathing in the same air he breathes in. You hear sounds of air traveling in and out of the body. And the taste of his kiss lingering on your tongue. Is it that the room is hot or is your body just so warm? You're not close enough to his heart to hear it pulsing and your doesn't beat as sound as when you are anxious anymore. everything is slow and air feels like the softest, fine-grained powder puffed onto your skin. time was forgotten. For a moment your mind was blank and it didn't feel as tense...
You hugged him tighter and so did he. "you sleepy yet, Porco?" "...mmh." You're too lazy to switch off the light and was ready to fall asleep right now. The sun could beam at you out of the blue and you couldn't care less.
Is this enough? Is this moment enough for the sake of it?
You never thought of that. You didn't know if you were actively feeling happy and grateful because sometimes your mind indulges in the thought that this kind of thing will be available for you till you die, and you hate taking things for granted. So let's not think much just for now since you've got more to feel.
But you knew you were at ease. Maybe next morning, when sleepiness would drape all over you, you would know to appreciate this moment, him and you better.