Chapter Text
Heedo is driving back home, she placed her diary on the passenger seat, eyes were still a bit swollen from shedding tears earlier. Ever since she had Minchae, her mind have been preoccupied with her own business and her family and she didn't have any time to reminisce and think about Yijin until now.
'I wonder how is he doing.. How's Yihyun? I'm pretty sure he's still working for UBS but I never saw him in any news since that year he interviewed and congratulated me.. Does my mom ever talk to him? Is he.. married?'
There are thousands of questions Heedo have on her mind and one thing's for sure and that is she doesn't have a single answer for any of it. How come a person you've cherished so much for years turned out to be the most unknown stranger all of the sudden? She was holding back her tears when she thought of the word "stranger".
Heedo married Kim Junho, one of her fencing colleagues back when she was still competing. When she and Yijin broke up, she diverted all of her attention to fencing which in return, gained her multiple wins from different competitions in different places around the world. Junho was there with her all the time. He was the one who supported her and gave her strength in every hardships she faced whether on her career or personal life. However, after 5 years of being married, they parted ways in good terms. I guess it's not always a perfect relationship even though you have the same interests. When they got divorced, she became busy being a mom to Minchae, who was on her formative years. Heedo made sure that Minchae won't feel any less even though her parents are separated. She made sure that Minchae won't feel alone like what she experienced before. Junho and Heedo made sure that their daughter got all of the love and support that she deserves and they made a great job on that.
Heedo wanted to see Yijin again. After all these years, this is the only time she felt the need to have his presence in front of her eyes. She wanted to drive wherever he is but she doesn't know where to start. She hasn't been in contact with anyone for years now even with Yurim since she and Jiwoong immigrated.
She felt confused and lost.
Why.. Why did they ever stop contacting each other? What happened? It feels like the memories she had with her most precious friends are just mere fragments of her imagination.
Heedo arrived at their house and rested her tired body on the couch. She barely did anything today but she absolutely felt exhausted. Yes, it's the aging symptom.
Minchae got out from her room and saw her mom lying on the couch, "Mom, did you just come back? Where have you been?"
"Mhm, I just went to a very special place." Heedo was staring at the ceiling blanky then turned her gaze to her little girl. "Have you eaten yet?"
"Yes, grandma came here earlier and we went out to eat." Minchae sat beside her mom, looking at Heedo who has her eyes shut and her right arm sitting on top of her forehead. "Mom, did something happen today?"
Heedo shook her head as a response and gave out a faint smile to assure her daughter. "I'm okay. I'm just a little tired. I didn't do much today but I get tired quickly. Ah.. I just want to be 18 again.."
The last words from her mom caught her attention. 'Did she meet Baek Yijin today?' Is that what she meant by wanting to be 18 again? To meet with her friends like they used to before? To be with Baek Yijin again?
"Mom, did you meet Baek Yijin today?" Minchae's question kinda sent an electric shock to Heedo's body that made her open her eyes and get up from her position.
"No I didn't. I just went somewhere by myself. Why did you think I met him earlier?" Heedo was trying so hard not to sound defensive even though none of what her daughter asked happened. But why she felt a bit wary? She suddenly felt her cheeks warmed up even though they're in middle of spring season.
"Mom! You didn't have to feel so anxious.. I'm okay if you met him, I don't mind at all. I'm pretty sure dad won't mind either." Minchae said in a playful tone but meant every word she uttered.
"Minchae-ya. Really, there's nothing like that. But to help you sleep at night, if ever the time comes that I meet someone who makes me happy, you'll be the first one to know." Heedo lovingly caress her daughter's cheeks. She resembles her dad so much, maybe that's why her personality mostly came from her.
Heedo came out from the shower and grabbed her phone from her bedside table to call her mom. She asked her how her day went, talked a little bit about her dad, and thank her for taking Minchae out. Jaekyung was about to drop the call when they said their goodnights when Heedo asked her something out of the blue.
"Mom.. by any chance.. have you talked to Yijin recently?"
Jaekyung widened her eyes when she heard Yijin's name from Heedo, not because she didn't expect it, but because it actually took a while for Heedo to ask her about him. She knew Yijin was one of the most adored friends, probably more than that, of Heedo. She certainly liked him for her daughter and even thought they'll end up getting married but apparently that's not the reality. You see, the complexity of Heedo and Yijin's friendship is really different from others. They've become each other's support system even though they are physically away from each other. They both understood each other's feelings and how to handle every situation they're into until 2001 when the two drifted apart.
'He didn't need my support anymore..' Heedo told her while she was just staring at the void. She was done crying but you can still see on her face the pain she's trying so hard to bury inside.
"I thought I'll never hear Yijin's name from you anymore." Jaekyung chuckled a little bit then continued, "Honestly, I haven't heard from him ever since I asked him if he wanted to take my place as the senior news anchor. So to answer your question, no."
Heedo bit her lip when she heard her mom's confession. "Okay, I understand. I'll see you whenever, mom. Good night again."
'I wonder if Yurim knows about Yijin's whereabouts, after all, they've known each other longer than I have known him.'
For the first time in 13 years, Heedo somehow couldn't fall asleep despite feeling worn out, she just kept on tossing and turning on her bed trying to look for the most comfortable position to sleep in.
'Ah, aging is really annoying.'