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Pamela didn’t know why she was so nervous. There was no reason to be. It was just another date. Another date with Jackson. No biggie.
It was her idea to go to the beach. She planned it out. She had no reason to be anxious.
“You’ll be fine, Pam,” Brenda had come over once again to help her get ready. They had spent all morning going through different potential outfits and preparing for a day on the beach. “It’s not like this is your first date together.”
It didn’t help that she could barely keep down her food. She felt like puking every time she took a nibble of anything she tried to eat. Pamela thought that her nerves would calm after they had gone on a few dates, but she was still as scared as the first time she asked Jackson out.
“Pamela!” Marco yelled for her from downstairs, “Your boyfriend is here!”
Crap . “I-I’m coming!” She was not ready.
“Look at me,” Brenda grabbed her face and smooshed her cheeks together, “You are going to fine. You two are gonna go out and have the time of your lives and make out and-”
“Brenda!” Pamela felt her face get red.
“Shh, don’t interrupt me.” Brenda went over to her bed and grabbed Pam’s bag and handed it to her, “You and Jackson are gonna have so much fun that you’re not even going to remember why you were nervous in the first place. And you’re gonna tell me all about it when you get back, ‘kay?”
Pamela took a deep breath and sighed, “Okay.”
X
When Pamela went downstairs, her nerves went away almost immediately. Jackson looked at her with the same expression he had when they went on their first date. It never changed, no matter how many times he saw her. It made Pamela feel both embarrassed and cherished.
Jackson had borrowed his tio’s car for the day. They talked during the ride about random topics. Pamela updated him on how the others have been doing with all the chaos going on in their lives and Jackson talked about his friends. They talked about family and school and anything that came to mind. The hour-long drive felt like no time at all.
Pamela went over to the shoreline while Jackson set up their things. She watched as the waves crashed into one another, letting the sound envelop her.
She almost jumped when arms wrapped around her waist, but she recognized them as well as the chin resting on her shoulder, “Whatcha doin’?”
Pam couldn’t resist her chuckle, bringing her hand up to cup his cheek, her other hand going to hold his, entwining their fingers together, “Enjoying the view.”
Comfortable silence fell over them. Neither of them talked, but there was no need for talking. Pam felt at ease just watching the water in Jackson’s embrace. Pamela felt Jackson’s giggle more than she heard it.
“How much would you hate me,” Jackson’s arms tightened around her waist, “if you threw you into the water right now?”
Pamela looked over her shoulder. The glint in Jackson’s eyes told her he wasn’t kidding. Both of them were still fully clothed, “You wouldn’t dare.”
The quirk in Jackson’s brow took that as a challenge.
Pam tried (and failed) to get away, but the arms around her waist had a good grip on her torso, her feet were off the ground before she knew it. “Jackson, let me go!” She tried her best to sound serious, but laughter filled her voice. Jackson bolted into the water and dove in.
Their laughter filled the space around them as they held each other in the water.
X
The sun was setting and the two had settled on the beach making a sandcastle. It didn't look the best since they didn’t have any buckets, but it was theirs.
Jackson apparently was tired and scooted over to Pamela and rested his head on her thighs. He sighed and it was clear that he had no plan on moving any time soon.
Pam decided that what was supposed to look like a fortress was good enough and finished up. She ran a few fingers through Jackson’s hair and admired the sunset.
It took her a while to realize that Jackson had fallen asleep.
He looked different in his sleep. It was still Jackson, but the stress on his face was gone, the furrow between his brows gone. She kept running her fingers through his hair, a complete mess from the wind and water. Pam saw the dark circles under his eyes and she traced them with her fingertip.
Pam yanked her finger away when she noticed the small smile on Jackson’s lips. One of his eyes pried open, “Why’d you stop?”
She could feel her face flush. But that didn’t stop her from worrying.
Jackson sat up, “I’m fine. Don’t worry about me.”
Pamela grabbed his hand, rubbing circles with her thumb. She looked into his eyes, “Are you okay?”
Jackson took a moment to speak. He stared at his hand between Pam’s, and covered hers with his other one, “No,” he leaned over to her and pressed a kiss into her temple, “but I will be.”
His smile was so honest, Pamela could do nothing but believe him. She rested her head on his shoulder and the two stayed there until it was dusk.
X
When Jackson dropped Pamela off, she didn’t want the day to end. And she was pretty positive that Jackson didn’t want it to end either.
They stayed in the driveway, foreheads pressed together.
Jackson was the first to talk, “You should probably head inside before Marco kills me.”
Pamela chuckled, “Marco loves you. He probably won’t care.”
“Keyword is probably ,” Jackson held her hand in his, “I’ll talk to you later, okay?”
“Okay,” She let go of his hands and started walking to her front door. When she looked over her shoulder, Jackson was standing there, waiting for her to make it inside. Like anything would happen from his car to her house, barely 20 feet apart. But the thought of it did something to Pamela’s stomach. She stopped dead in her tracks.
She didn’t want the day to end. Not like this.
She turned on her heels and ran back to Jackson, who looked very confused, “Jackson?”
“Yeah?”
Am I really gonna do this?
“Would you…” Pamela had trouble getting the words out.
I’m doing this.
Pam squeezed her eyes shut, “Would you like…a kiss?”
Jackson made a choking sound. It was completely silent. Dread formed in Pamela’s gut, instantly regretting this decision.
The next thing she felt was a hand cupping her chin, forcing her to face Jackson, but her eyes were still shut.
“Pam, look at me,” Jackson sounded so sincere, she couldn’t not open her eyes. He had a smile so wide and so happy that she thought this wasn’t real. “I would love to. If you’d let me.”
Jackson waited. He waited for her to make the first move. She wasn’t sure if that was better or worse.
When she leaned in, everything else in the world didn’t exist. Nothing else mattered but this moment. It was just how she imagined. Jackson’s lips were soft yet slightly chapped. It was deep, but soft and gentle, no rush to do anything else. They had wrapped their arms around each other, neither wanting to let go.
When they did part, Pamela’s legs felt like jelly. How she was still standing, she didn’t know.
“I said I don’t want nephews yet!” Pamela snapped back into reality when Marco shouted at them from inside.
Pamela wanted to kill him, “Go away, Marco!” Jackson had burst out laughing. Pam was mortified, “I’m sorry about that. I am so going to kill him.”
“It’s fine. Go inside and don’t get any blood on your clothes.”
That got a snicker out of her, “See you later?”
Jackson nodded and gave her one last peck on the top of the head.
Pamela had nothing to be nervous about.