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»»———— ♡ ————««
Junmyeon stares at Sehun’s face, his head on Sehun’s lap as they hang around the living room. Junmyeon’s hand automatically goes to hold Sehun’s cheeks, and as if there was some magnet between them, Sehun leans down and gives Junmyeon a peck on the lips. Junmyeon smiles and gets lost in thought.
How did I get so lucky to have found someone who loves me as much as you do?
»»———— ♡ ————««
The first time Junmyeon met Sehun was in his sophomore year. He was attending class, as usual, sitting at the far corner of the room, trying not to get any attention. After all, it was only a year before that he was the talk of the entire campus. And then, a man comes in, and suddenly, a crowd forms around him.
Junmyeon was a little curious, so he took a quick peek and saw the man’s features, broad shoulders, thick eyebrows, a chiseled jaw, and a particularly handsome face. When their eyes met by accident, Junmyeon was embarrassed, so he quickly looked away and pretended nothing had happened.
Why is it so hot in this room? Maybe I should change seats?
Junmyeon was barely able to listen to the professor; his mind was somewhere else. And before he knew it, the class was already over, so he started packing his stuff and getting ready to grab lunch.
“Sehun?” Junmyeon hears one of his classmates say.
“You can go ahead. I’ll catch up.” The man, who Junmyeon guessed was Sehun, replied.
Junmyeon closed the zipper of his bag, slung it on his shoulder, and was ready to go out when he saw ‘Sehun’ in front of him.
Junmyeon just stared at him.
“Hey, I’m Oh Sehun. Nice to meet you.” Sehun says, offering his hand as if waiting for Junmyeon to shake it.
Junmyeon felt a little awkward and did not really want to have anything to do with him, but he figured out it was better to just go with the flow.
“I’m Kim Junmyeon,” Junmyeon replies and hastily shakes the hand in front of him.
“Do you want to grab lunch with us, Junmyeon?”
“No, it’s fine. Thanks for the invite.”
“Uhm, sure.”
Junmyeon was at the door when Sehun grabbed his shoulders. Junmyeon looked back at him, this time with a frown on his face.
“Did you have anything else to say?”
“You see, uhm, I’m actually a transfer student, so I don’t know a lot of people here. By chance, can we be friends?”
Junmyeon lets out a defeated sigh.
“Believe me, you’re better off not being friends with me.”
Sehun was stunned at what he had just heard, and Junmyeon took this opportunity to leave.
»»———— ♡ ————««
“Junmyeon? What are you thinking about?” Sehun says, staring at Junmyeon.
“Nothing?”
“Come on, tell me.” Sehun leans down and gives Junmyeon another peck.
“I just remembered the first time I met you.”
“Oh, that time when you shut me down?”
“What? No, I mean, I just didn’t think it was best of you to get involved with me.”
“You’re lucky I’m persistent, Junmyeon.”
“True. Otherwise, I wouldn’t have you here with me.” Junmyeon says with a serious face, causing Sehun to blush.
“Junmyeon, why are you being like this?” Sehun says, covering his face with his hands.
“Awwww, is my cute boyfriend embarrassed?” Junmyeon says, teasing Sehun.
“It’s just that I’m not used to you suddenly saying things like that.”
“Well, you like it though.”
“What? Of course, not!”
“Your little friend here says otherwise. You might not be honest, but your body sure is.” Junmyeon says before using his fingers to probe the bulge on Sehun’s pants.
This causes Sehun to turn redder.
“You’re so cute, Sehun.”
»»———— ♡ ————««
“Junmyeon!” someone called, and Junmyeon started walking faster, trying his best to avoid the owner of the voice.
He safely makes it to the corner of the room and turns where he thinks he won’t be seen. He lets out a sigh of relief, thinking he had finally escaped his pursuer, when suddenly, someone spoke.
“Why are you hiding from me, Junmyeon?”
“I—I am not! I just-”
“Just what?”
“I was just going to the bathroom!” Junmyeon says and heads to the bathroom stall and locks the door.
“I’ll wait for you!” Sehun replies in a sing-song voice.
“Don’t wait for me. I’ll be here for a long time.”
“But you have classes in 5 minutes, don’t you?”
Junmyeon got out of the stall and hurriedly walked past Sehun and toward his next class.
However, Sehun is stubborn and sat next to Junmyeon in class.
I can’t even concentrate on class; why is this guy so persistent? What does he want from me?
»»———— ♡ ————««
Junmyeon nuzzles his face against Sehun’s stomach before putting his arms around him and embracing him hard.
“Junmyeon, are you sick?” Sehun says and puts his hand over Junmyeon’s forehead.
“No, I’m not.”
“Why are you being so clingy, then?”
“Am I not allowed to be clingy to my boyfriend?”
“Of course you are.”
I am so lucky you are mine.
»»———— ♡ ————««
The pattern went on for months before Junmyeon decided to give in.
“Junmyeooooooon, let’s go have lunch.”
“Okay, where do you want to eat?” Junmyeon replies nonchalantly.
Sehun’s mouth gaped open.
“What? What did you just say?”
“Don’t make me repeat myself.”
“No, please say it again. Did you really ask me where I wanted to eat? Are you really eating with me?”
“Tell me before I change my mind.”
“Okay, let’s go! I’ll treat you this time!”
“You don’t need---”
Sehun cuts Junmyeon off and links their arms together.
“Let’s goooooo! Let’s goooo!
»»———— ♡ ————««
Was it then? Was that the moment Junmyeon decided to let Sehun in? Was that the moment he fell for him?
“Sehun?”
“Yes?”
“When did you start liking me?”
“The first time I saw you?”
Junmyeon lightly punches Sehun’s arm when he says that.
“What?”
“Stop joking!”
“I’m not joking.”
“No way.”
“You might not believe it, but it was just love at first sight for me. Then, I got to know you more and fell for you harder. I’m a simple man like that.”
Junmyeon blushes, thinking thoroughly about how he fell in love with Sehun.
“How about you, Junmyeon? When did you start liking me?”
“Uhm…I really don’t know?”
“That’s unfair! You have to tell me.”
“Can you let me think about it?”
“Okay, but I expect an answer, okay?”
Junmyeon nods and Sehun gives him another kiss.
And something clicked in Junmyeon’s mind.
It was as if there was a treasure chest just waiting to be opened inside his brain.
»»———— ♡ ————««
There were a lot of times that Junmyeon realized that Sehun was a caring person.
He would always open water bottles for Junmyeon before giving them to him.
During finals week, he would drag Junmyeon out of the library just so he could eat because if he didn’t Junmyeon would stay there the entire day.
When Junmyeon’s grandma got sick, and he couldn’t go home because of the amount of workload in school, Sehun helped him out so that he could finish things faster. Because of this, Junmyeon was there when she took her last breath.
But when was it that Junmyeon started liking him?
Was it when Sehun asked him out on their first date?
Was it when Sehun told Junmyeon how much he liked him?
Junmyeon feels like it was way before that.
Maybe it was when he fell asleep on the phone while telling Sehun some of the things he feared the most.
Maybe it was when he was feeling depressed when he came back to school after his grandmother’s funeral, and Sehun took him out for a picnic. They didn’t say a single word, but Junmyeon felt comfort in Sehun’s presence.
Maybe it was when they fought for the first time, but Sehun still opened bottles for him, still ate lunch with him, and made sure he was never alone.
Maybe it was when Junmyeon got sick to the point that he couldn’t get out of bed, and Sehun took a day off from school to take care of him until he got better.
Or maybe it was all of that.
Maybe Junmyeon had already fallen for Sehun way before he realized it.
»»———— ♡ ————««
“Sehun?”
“Yes?”
“What are you doing?”, Junmyeon says, standing at the door of their bedroom.
“I’m just reading something. Why?”
“I want to tell you something.”
“Come here,” Sehun says, patting the space next to him as he is lying on the bed.
Junmyeon comes in and lays his head on Sehun’s chest.
“What did you want to say?” Sehun asks softly.
“I can’t seem to pinpoint the exact moment I fell for you. I’m so sorry.”
“It’s okay, Jun.”
“But I can tell you all the moments leading up to it?”
“It’s really okay. You don’t have to.”
“No, listen. For the longest time in my life, I thought loving a person meant that I had to sacrifice everything I had for them. I thought I needed to be what the other person wanted me to be so that they would love me. For me, love was something that was unreachable until it wasn’t. After that, I met a person that ruined my whole perception of love even more, to the point that I thought love was just meant to ruin me. But then you came.”
Junmyeon’s eyes started to get watery.
“You came, and you showed me a glimpse of a whole new world. A place where love isn’t something that asks for something in return but just gives. You showed me that my opinions matter and that my feelings are valid. You made me believe that all this time, I was wrong about love. What I thought was love was just something I made myself think it was because of the people that hurt me. You trusted me with your heart even when I didn’t know what to do with it. You gave yourself to me and showed me kindness at times when I couldn’t even bear to be kind to myself. I have learned so much about love from you, Sehun.”
“Junmyeon, you’re going to make me cry.”
“Sehun, you see, I am grateful for all the things that you have done for me, especially the little things that you thought would go unnoticed. But I realized they were not the reason I fell for you. I fell in love with you because you let me be who I am without asking for anything in return. You loved me in a way that allowed me to grow into the person I am today, someone who loves you dearly. In you, I found peace, and I think the moment that I realized I am at peace with you is the moment I knew you were the one for me.”
Sehun’s face was now covered in tears.
“I love you, Jun. You didn’t have to give me a whole speech. I just wanted to know when you started liking me. But being the writer you are, you gave me far more than the answer I was looking for. I love you, I really do.”
Junmyeon kisses away all the tears on Sehun’s lovely face. And they remained in each other’s arms for a long time.
“I love you too, Sehun. I am so lucky to have found you.”
Because in you, I found out that I, too, am worthy of love.