Work Text:
“Hurry up!” Ranpo called over his shoulder to Yosano as he ran forward, “we have to get there before it closes!”
Yosano sighed but did speed up her walking. “The bakery doesn’t close for another couple of hours.”
“Still! We should get there soon,” Ranpo said seriously as he stopped at a crosswalk to wait for a light to change, “I want sweets as soon as possible!”
“For you, that’s a fair point. You probably should have started with that,” Yosano pointed out as she reached the crosswalk as well.
“I’ll keep that in mind for next time,” Ranpo responded, tapping his foot impatiently as he watched the car zoom by. He really hoped this light would change soon.
Immediately after he thought it, the light changed to let people cross. The cars slowed to a stop and Ranpo wasted no time to shoot across the road.
“Race you!”
“Hey! Slow down!” Yosano yelled as he ran off. Ranpo simply laughed in response as he sped up.
He crossed the road first and ran a little further just to prove the point that he had been first. And gone further. And had been faster than Yosano! He slowed down and stopped before he passed more than one building. Turning around, he waved to Yosano who still hadn’t crossed the road.
“I win!” He brought a hand to cup his mouth to call out to her.
“Well, I wasn’t even participating so you win by default.”
“Still an accomplishment to me!” He said happily as he leaned against the wall of the nearby building to watch her catch up.
Yosano’s eyes had suddenly widened and she started running. Ranpo was about to ask what was wrong when he noticed her eyes were locked on a spot past his shoulder. He turned around to see what she was so worried about when—
Two hands reached out to grab him. Before he could see the person who had grabbed him, a blindfold was shoved over his eyes. He could feel himself being dragged in the direction of the alleyway nearby.
Ranpo struggled in their grip and opened his mouth to yell for help, but before he could, a hand covered it. He instinctively bit down.
Ughh, gross.
They were wearing gloves which means he likely hadn’t done much damage. But it also meant Ranpo had just bit into dirty and dusty gloves. Again. Gross.
It seems even if he hadn’t done any damage, the person must have felt it.
“Ewwwww. Did you just bite me?” Wait… that was a very familiar voice.
“Well, you just grabbed him out of nowhere and covered his mouth. Of course he was going to bite you!”
“But now I’m going to have to clean these,” the first voice complained. Yep. He definitely knew who these people were.
Ranpo stopped struggling as he instead focused on kicking the person in front of him in the legs (gently!).
“You gonna tell me why you are kidnapping me again or am I going to have to figure it out myself?” Ranpo snarked as the person he had kicked yelped. “I didn’t even kick you that hard!”
“Are you sure you didn’t? ‘Cause it sure felt like you were trying to—”
“You let him go!” Yosano’s voice cut through the air. It sounded like she was getting close.
“Okay! We gotta bounce,” the one still holding him announced. He let himself be dragged away as they ran away, but he didn’t contribute anything to the running.
Just because he trusted them didn’t mean he was going to put any work into helping them kidnap himself.
There were the sounds of five sets of footsteps running, including Yosano’s whose footsteps were quieter on the account of being further away. Ranpo was bumped against a door frame and after a few moments,the sound of a door slamming shut was heard.
“Did you lock it?” One of the asked.
“What do you take me for? Some kind of stupid common criminal? Of course I—.” They cut themselves off. Then silence. The sound of a door locking. “The door is now locked.”
There was then the sound of someone bashing on the door. “You open this right now and I promise I’ll at least heal you halfway after I get my hands on you!”
“Yep, let’s go.”
Ranpo reached up to take his blindfold off, but a hand stopped him.
“Can you keep that on? Please? Just for a little bit. We still need to keep some secrets.”
“Fine…” Ranpo grumbled, moving his hand away from the blindfold.
“Thanks!”
Ranpo let them guide him down a few hallways and even down a couple sets of stairs. They were talking very enthusiastically about something. He wasn’t quite sure about what exactly as he wasn’t really paying that much attention.
(Excuse him if he didn’t feel like listening after they still haven’t explained why they were kidnapping him yet.)
The sound of another door opening and…
“And we’re here! Ta da!”
Ranpo took off his blindfold to see Nishi with his arms outstretched and gestering excitedly towards a room. From what he could see from his position, Ranpo saw a table, couch, bookshelf, and a couple different types of chairs.
“Not your old headquarters?” Ranpo questioned while going inside and immediately claiming the couch. When Sano approached and tried to sit down, Ranpo purposely moved to have his legs take up all of the whole couch.
“Well, it’s not really ‘old headquarters’ since we still have it,” Nishi corrected while entering the room. When everyone had gone through the doorway, they closed the door. “It’s just that we have multiple bases and this one was just the closest. We thought you’d probably appreciate not being dragged halfway across the city. Also, this base is probably the most comfortable one.”
While Nishi had been talking, Ryo had been rummaging through a mini fridge in the corner. They had pulled out multiple juice boxes.
“Apple, orange, or grape?” Ryo asked, holding up the juice boxes.
“Apple,” Sano said, “please.”
“I’ll take orange if that’s okay,” Nishi responded.
“Which one has more sugar?”
“Ummm…” Ryo looked at the labels on the back of the boxes. After reading them, they looked up at Ranpo. “Grape does. Orange has the least.”
“Can I have grape juice then?”
“Sure.” Ryo tossed a box to Ranpo and then the others. Ranpo fumbled for a bit but managed to hold it securely afterwards. He then wasted no time before unwrapping the straw attached and putting it inside.
Ryo turned towards Hirata. “Want any?”
“Nah. I’m good.”
Ryo nodded and put the remaining juice boxes back into the mini fridge. They kept an Apple juice box for themselves.
Hirata turned towards Ranpo. “Yeah, so we also brought you to this base since it’s bad kidnapping planning to bring a person to the same place twice. I figured we could pretend to be at least a little bit professional about the whole thing.”
“Makes sense I guess.” Ranpo shrugged. “Speaking of kidnapping, why did you kidnap me in the first place?”
“Well, we had to get in contact with you somehow,” Sano pointed out. After Ranpo had prevented them from sitting on the couch, they had resorted to sitting on the table (ignoring the many chairs around them). “And we can’t just exactly walk right up to the agency where you work. We are known criminals after all.”
“You could have just called me y’know,” Ranpo said before taking a sip of his juice while raising an eyebrow at them.
Nishi was quiet while staring at the floor. “Why… Why didn’t we think of that?”
Ryo spoke up. “We don’t have your number. And… we forgot Fukuzawa’s number.”
“Then you could have just walked up to me and I would have given it to you.”
“You would have?” Ranpo nodded in response. “Then that is a fair point.”
“Again. Why didn’t we think of that?” Nishi repeated, looking around at everyone. They all shuffled around and didn’t respond.
Ranpo frowned down at his grape juice box. It was empty already…
Looking up, he saw a garbage can near Hirata. Aiming, Ranpo threw it forwards to attempt to throw the box in. He almost missed, but Hirata moved the can at the last second to make sure the juice box got in.
“Anyways, you didn’t entirely answer my question,” Ranpo said as he turned back to Sano, “why did you kidnap me?”
“It’s because we found out you were only considered Fukuzawa’s ward!” Nishi rushed, voice raising in volume near the end. “Just a ward!”
“Yeah?” Ranpo tilted his head in their direction. “So?”
“We have some adoption papers we need you to sign.” Ranpo nearly started off the couch and Ryo seemed to materialize next to him. Papers were then shoved in Ranpo’s face.
Giving them a quick look over, Ranpo could see that they appeared to have been written on the behalf of Fukuzawa (even though he likely hadn’t asked for them to be written).
“You wanted me to sign adoption papers,” Ranpo started slowly, giving each person in the room a long stare, “so you kidnapped me.”
Silence.
“Well, when you put it like that, it sounds bad.”
“It’s bad either way,” Ranpo stated, “your plan was horrible.”
“We never said it was a well thought out plan!” Sano defended.
“You literally put a blindfold over my eyes.” Ranpo stared down Sano. He’s pretty sure they were the one who had been responsible for the blindfold. “I feel like one second of thought could have confirmed that was a bad idea.”
“Hey! At least we didn’t use a bag!” Hirata shouted out. “We have standards.”
“Ah yes. Because apparently not using a bag was the bare minimum.”
“Yeah, well—!”
“We’re getting off track.” Ryo tapped the papers in Ranpo’s hands. “Are you going to sign them?”
“Uhh…” Ranpo took a few moments to think. He flipped through the pages and pretended to be reading them to give himself more time to think it through.
While he could admit that having Fukuzawa as his legal patent wouldn’t do that much now that he was an adult (besides for maybe being declared next of kin. As it was pointed out in the legal papers), he could also admit that it would be nice to have Fukuzawa be his official dad.
Hmmm… he didn’t think he’d ever actually brought the subject up with Fukuzawa. He always kinda assumed it was an unspoken but accepted truth that he saw Fukuzawa as a dad but maybe this was a thing he had just overthought.
Still, the documents stated both people would have to agree, so there would be no harm in signing them. If Fukuzawa didn’t want to, he would simply just not have to sign.
“Sure,” Ranpo said aloud, not speaking any of his other thoughts. Getting up, he walked towards the table. Reaching into his pocket, he took out his hanko case. “Do any of you have any ink?”
“I do!” Nishi responded immediately, running over to Ranpo. They offered a red ink tray to him in their hand.
Opening his case, Ranpo took out the hanko and pressed it in the tray. He then stamped it on the line on the paper.
“Aaaand… done!” He declared, wiping his hanko clean and putting it away. He looked down proudly at the stamp. He hadn’t even smudged it!
There was the sound of cheering behind him, as well as clapping.
“Now all we need is for Fukuzawa to do it!” Ryo walked up to the table and retrieved the papers.
“We could probably just give the papers to you, and you could give them to him, right?” Sano asked Ranpo.
“I could, but some people kidnapped me while I was on my way to a bakery.” He gave them all a half hearted glare. “Let’s go to the bakery first. Together. You owe me!”
“Yeah! Let’s go do that!” Nishi cheered while heading towards the door.
“Wait, hold on now.” Hirata held out their arm to block Nishi before they could exit. “In case you’ve forgotten, we did take Ranpo. If we go back up there, everyone going to think that we kidnapped him—”
“Because you did,” Ranpo interjected.
Hirata continued. “—and will try to arrest us.”
“I think you’re just worrying too much,” Sano stated while moving around Hirata.
“I say that I’m the leader—”
“Unofficial leader!”
“—and that we should play it safe.”
“You’re just a killjoy.”
“I’m sorry, what?” Hirata snapped at Sano, “I am not a killj—”
Sano opened the door and shot through the doorway. “I’m sorry but I can’t hear you from all the way up here!” They shouted as they started running up the stairs. “You’ll have to get closer for me to hear you! And who knows? Maybe I’ll even be at the bakery by the time you catch up!”
Hirata growled and chased after them. Nishi laughed before joining in the chase as well. Walking up to Ranpo, Ryo threw away their juice box and waited by the door for Ranpo.
Ranpo nodded to them as he walked past. As soon as he did, Ryo closed the door and took out some keys. Locking it, they then turned back to Ranpo.
“We should probably follow them now,” Ryo said, starting their climb on the stairs.
“Yeah,” Ranpo agreed. He could hear the sound of Hirata yelling at Sano as both Nishi and Sano laughed.
When both Ryo and Ranpo had climbed the stairs to the ground level, they saw the others waiting for them. Or… maybe not waiting for them as their sole purpose, but they had waited around the exit door.
Nishi was hugging Hirata while Hirata was glaring at Sano. Sano was leaning against a wall while laughing as Hirata tried to escape the hug. When they arrived, Hirata turned (as much as they could) towards them.
“You’re here! Good.” Hirata took a step back. Nishi took a step forward. “Nishi got clingy again. Please free me, Ryo! Sano won’t help me!”
“Hmmmm…” Ryo brought their hand to their face as they gave a considerate look. “I’m not sure. Do you still think going to the bakery is a bad idea?”
“It’s the best idea!” Nishi said passionately, still hugging Hirata.
Hirata sighed. “Fine… we can go.”
Nishi immediately let them go and ran out the door. Cheering, Ranpo ran after them. The others didn’t take long to start following them as well.
Overall, the walk to the bakery was uneventful. They were mostly just talking while Ryo would try to steer them in the right direction when they got off track.
“Yeah, so thank you for getting together and writing all those documents,” Ranpo said while following where Ryo was going (they had taken the lead after one too many wrong turns that had almost been taken). “Those looked very tedious to write so I’m glad you did all of the hard work instead of me!”
Sano nodded. “Yeah. It was kinda tedious, but we all divided the work up so it ended up not being too bad.”
“And it was even less bad when it was all for the purpose of making the best father-son duo become official in the eyes of the law!” Nishi said cheerfully.
“I’m going to choose to believe it was not creepy that you looked up my legal records to find out I was a ward.” Ranpo shrugged. “I just hope all your work doesn’t go to waste. We still have to convince Fukuzawa to agree.”
“What do you mean ‘convince’?” Sano asked.
“Well, we’ve never really talked about it so I’m not sure if he sees me as a son.”
“But you literally called him your father when we first met!” Hirata called out from where they were walking near the back of the group. (They had been walking slower than the others as they were less enthusiastic about going to the bakery).
“Yeah, but that’s just my feelings,” Ranpo pointed out, “I have no idea how Fukuzawa feels about it.”
“But what about after you left? You don’t… remember anything happening.”
“I remember crashing. I don’t think I remember anything from after I passed out.”
Ryo had stopped walking and Ranpo nearly ran into them. Thankfully, he managed to stop in time. But still.
“I can’t believe how someone so smart can be so dumb,” Ryo muttered under their breath.
“What was that?”
“Uh… nothing. I mean…” Ryo looked up and pointed to a nearby sign. “We’re here!”
“Great!” Ranpo weaved past Ryo and opened the doors to the bakery.
“Hello, Ranpo,” the person at the counter greeted. He went to this bakery so often that all of the staff knew him.
“Hi, Azuma!” He said back as walked over and leaned on the counter. No one else was currently forming a line. “Can I have one of every type of cookie? Except for ones with raisins or oatmeal, of course.”
“New people with you, I see,” Azuma commented as Ryo and the others finally entered.
“Yep!”
“Hires of your agency or friends? Or both?” Azuma asked while taking cookies out of their cases and putting them in a box.
“Friends.”
“Awwww, we’re friends?” Ryo asked while joining Ranpo in leaning against the counter. They then turned to the rest if the group. “Also, I can pay for everyone.”
“Of course we’re friends!” Ranpo stated cheerfully.
“Also, you're not paying,” Hirata said firmly as they got closer.
“But—!”
“If you’re going to be insistent about it, we can split the cost. But you’re not paying for everyone!”
“But I always pay for everyone…”
“And I say you don’t pay for anyone this time. Not even yourself!” Nishi declared. They then turned towards Hirata. “If you were going to split the cost with them, I can take their half!”
“I—!”
“You might as well just accept it,” Ranpo interrupted Ryo.
Ryo grumbled but didn’t argue any more.
Eventually Azuma had returned to the part of the counter where the group was and placed down a box. They slid it towards Ranpo. “Do you all want anything?” Azuma asked while looking at the others besides Ranpo.
“Umm…” Ryo started as Sano nudged them to prompt them to go first. “I’ll get a slice of that chocolate cake.” They said while pointing to a cake in one of the cases. More than half of the slices were already gone.
“Oh, come on.” Sano nudged Ryo again. “That’s one of the cheapest options. And I know for a fact you don’t like chocolate. Get what you really want!”
“But you all are paying for it…”
“I could probably help pay for whatever you pick,” Ranpo offered. He normally wouldn’t pay for someone else (and he normally uploaded the costs of his own orders onto any person he could) but he could make an exception for Ryo one time. “They’re already going to pay for my order so it’ll be my way of paying back but in a cheaper way!”
Ryo seemed to think it over for a few seconds before turning back to Azuma. “Can I get the red velvet?”
“Can do!” Azuma went over to take a slice of the red velvet cake in the case.
“Thank you,” Ryo said when they retrieved it.
The rest eventually ordered and got their sweets and they chose a half booth near the back of the main area.
“After this, we should probably give you the documents and send you back to your agency,” Hirata informed Ranpo through bites of his brownie.
“Sounds good to me!” Ranpo finished off one of his cookies and grabbed another. “Ryo, you still have the papers?”
“Yep!” Ryo was happily eating their red velvet cake.
“You’ll have to make sure to update us on what happens,” Sano said, looking up from where they had been hunched over their pie.
“Will do,” Ranpo responded, nodding along. He’d worry about the whole asking-Fukuzawa-if-he-wanted-to-be-his-father thing later. Right now he could just focus on his cookies!
“Ranpo has been kidnapped!”
Fukuzawa startled, but quickly composed himself, when Yosano came bursting into his office, Kunikida not far behind her, looking grim.
“When?” He asked, slamming the pen he had been writing with into the desk with way more force than necessary.
“Around fifteen minutes ago,” Yosano informed him, “I had to come back to the agency for back up.”
Fifteen minutes… the kidnappers and Ranpo could have gone far in that time, so they wouldn’t be able to return to the spot he had been kidnapped. They’d have to find a different solution, like…
Wait! He had it.
“We can track his phone to find them.” After one too many kidnapping attempts on all of the members (plus Ranpo getting lost so often) he had asked them all to get trackers installed into their phones for emergencies. Even Fukuzawa’s own phone had a tracker. They’d be able to use it to find out where the kidnappers had taken him. (If they hadn’t taken his phone away).
“Let’s hurry!”
It didn’t long to pick up the signal from the tracker. It was currently staying stationary, which hopefully was a sign of him being kept somewhere and not that his phone had been thrown out to the road.
They were on the run to the location in no time. They ran along the sidewalks, trying to get there as soon as possible.
“Strange…” Yosano mumbled and Fukuzawa almost couldn’t hear her. “I could swear this is the exact way to the…” Fukuzawa didn’t hear her finish.
Eventually they reached the building where the signal was and they slowed down, not wanting to rush in unprepared.
“The bakery?” Kunikida asked, being careful to avoid the windows, not wanting to give away their position. “Do you think…?” He didn’t finish his question.
Yosano quickly looked into the window before going back. “He’s in there,” she confirmed, “I wasn’t able to see what the kidnappers were doing to keep him contained. Should we just bust in?” She asked, looking towards Fukuzawa.
“Might not be the best idea,” Kunikida said before Fukuzawa could respond, “we don’t have enough information. The staff could be working with them. The staff could be being held hostage. The staff could even be unaware of it all. We have no idea if any of the kidnappers have any abilities. If we bust in, we could be putting other people at risk.”
“There should be a back door to the bakery. I remember seeing one here before,” Yosano recalled.
“Then we’ll go in through the back door,” Fukuzawa said, motioning for Kunikida and Yosano to follow him as he headed towards the side of the building. However, before they could turn the corner, someone exited the bakery.
“Oh. Hey guys!” Ranpo waved at them. “I thought that it had been Yosano I had seen through the window. And I was right!”
“Not now, Ranpo,” Kunikida scolded as he prepared to turn the corner, “don’t distract us. We’re trying to save you from your kidnappers.” He then looked back. “Wait… Ranpo?!”
“Yes? That’s my name!”
Fukuzawa froze as he saw more people exit behind Ranpo. Wait. Were they…?
“Ranpo,” Yosano said very slowly,” don’t move. Behind you right now, there are—”
“Oh right! You guys don’t know each other yet! Or, well, I suppose Fukuzawa knows already but you guys don’t.” Ranpo pulled the people closer. One of them waved sheepishly at them while the rest were staring at the concrete.
“ This is Nishi. And this is Ryo. And then we have Hirata and Sano!”
“How come Nishi and Ryo get an emphasized ‘this’ but me and Hirata get clumped together?” One of them —Sano?— complained.
“Because one of them gave me juice and the other didn’t put a blindfold over my eyes.”
“Hey! I wasn’t responsible for the blindfold,” Hirata pointed out.
“Yeah, well you were the one who knocked me out the first time we met.”
“How do you even know that? You were unconscious! And we never told you that!”
“I’m going to be honest. I had only had a hunch before and wasn’t one hundred percent sure, but your reaction just confirmed it.”
“Touché…”
Besides him, Fukuzawa saw Yosano and Kunikida relaxed after witnessing Ranpo —conversing? Bantering?— with the people. Seeing as they currently weren’t stopping Ranpo from returning to them, Fukuzawa lowered his guard as well.
“Wait!” The one who Ranpo had introduced as Ryo shouted out as they ran forward. Fukuzawa tensed for a fight but Ryo simply stopped in front of Ranpo and shoved some papers into his hand.
“Are these…?” Ranpo flipped through the pages and Ryo nodded. “Thank you!”
“No problem! You’ll have to tell us how it goes!”
“Will do!” Ranpo turned back around and started heading in the direction of the agency. “Now let’s go!” He told Fukuzawa as he headed forward.
Before they crossed the road, Ranpo turned to wave goodbye to the people in front of the bakery. They waved back.
“Did they just… let you to?” Yosano asked as they walked.
“Yep! They even took me to the bakery! Aren’t they so nice?”
“They kidnapped you. I wouldn’t call that ‘nice’.”
“Our definition of nice can differ, but in my books, they are nice.”
Fukuzawa stayed quiet as Yosano and Kunikida questioned Ranpo about what happened. He was still keeping an eye out to see if they were being followed. Thankfully, it seemed they had been genuine in letting Ranpo go… again.
Who kidnapped someone two separate times and let them go back with no trouble each time? (Apparently those criminals but he’d digress).
They were soon at the agency and Yosano had turned towards Ranpo.
“I know you said you were fine and that they didn’t hurt you, but I still want to check.”
Ranpo made a face but eventually complied. “Fine…”
As Ranpo and Yosano headed to her office and Kunikida was heading back to the main office area to work, Fukuzawa stood in the hallway for just a few seconds. After a while, he headed back to his office.
He wouldn’t be able to talk with Ranpo now since Yosano was checking for injuries. Still, he’d check up on him when they were done. Not that he didn’t trust Yosano, but just to see that he was fine himself.
“Hey, Fukuzawa…” The door to the office creaked as Ranpo opened it slowly.
“Yes, Ranpo?” Fukuzawa looked up from his desk as Ranpo slowly entered his office. He hadn’t had a chance to check up on him yet, so he hoped everything was okay.
“Can I ask you something?” Ranpo asked hesitantly, taking small steps closer to Fukuzawa's desk.
Fukuzawa nodded and moved his work to the side of his desk, giving Ranpo his full attention. “Of course.”
Ranpo fidgeted in place for a few seconds and Fukuzawa didn’t rush him. Eventually, Ranpo placed a pile of papers on Fukuzawa’s desk. Fukuzawa didn’t grab them right away, instead waiting for Ranpo to gesture that he should.
He raised an eyebrow at the first page, but as he read the rest of the documents, his face softened gradually. When he finished, he placed them back down on his desk gently. The page with Ranpo’s name already on it facing upwards.
“I’m assuming you wish for me to sign it?” He asked, his hanko already on his desk from signing paperwork. Still, he didn’t grab it, waiting for Ranpo’s response.
“If… if it’s okay with you…” Ranpo sounded uncertain as he spoke, looking down at his shoes and clamping and unclamping his hands together.
Fukuzawa inked the hanko and very carefully and deliberately stamped the page. He then placed the hanko to the side and stood up. Walking around his desk, he stopped in front of Ranpo.
“Ummm… I’m sorry if I kinda pressured you into agreeing to it by just dropping it on you. If you change your mind and don’t want to present the documents, that’s totally fine! It’s… just that…”
Ranpo trailed off as Fukuzawa leaned down to hug him. Slowly. Ever so slowly. He raised his arms to return the hug.
“I won’t ever change my mind,” Fukuzawa reassured him, tightening his hug.
“Thanks.” Ranpo tightened his hug as well. “Thank you, Dad.”
Fukuzawa let himself smile lightly. He pulled back from the hug and rested his hands on Ranpo’s shoulders.
“I’ll do my best to get them approved as soon as possible,” Fukuzawa promised as Ranpo’s eyes shined. He then stood up and ruffled his hair affectionately, causing his hat to almost fall off. “I look forward to having you as a son officially.”
Bonus:
“Do you think he did it yet?”
“Do you think Fukuzawa accepted it?”
“I’m not sure if he did yet, but if he did, there is absolutely no way Fukuzawa would say no!”
“No point in thinking about it though. He’ll call us about how it goes.”
“Yeah. Yeah, he will!”
“Umm… random question, but… which one of us did he give his number to?”
“I thought he gave it to you?”
“I didn’t get it? I thought it was one of you?”
“…”
“He never gave us his number, did he?”
“So… we’ll never find out?”
“Not unless we kidnap him again. So, no. No we never will.”
“Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!”