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“Mama!” Jackson pounced onto his mother in her bed as soon as he woke up, hugging her right around the neck, “Happy birthday!”
She laughed and held him tight, even if she was still sleepy, “Thank you, Jackie.” When they separated, the first thing she noticed was his clothes. They were covered in…well, a lot of things, “Uh, what happened to you?”
He grabbed her hand and dragged her onto her feet and into the kitchen. Jackson let go and spread his arms as wide as he could, “Surprise!”
She gasped as soon as she saw the room. And probably not for the reason Jackson thought. There was flour and sugar on almost every surface, dirty dishes scattered around the counters and table, eggshells littered on the floor, the oven still on, and a cake slathered with different colored frosting.
Jackson kept going on, not registering the panic on his mother’s face as she rushed over to the over and turning it off, “I woke up super early to make you a cake. Since it’s mama’s day!”
His mother walked over after she was done scanning the area, making sure there were no other potential hazards. Jackson proudly showed off his work. It was supposed to be them, but looked more like some indistinguishable creatures straight out of the gates of hell.
All she could do was chuckle, “Heh, thank you, mijo,” She went in for another hug, “I love it.”
X
Jackson woke up to the night light blinding him and tears streaming down his face. His breathing was fast and uneven. It took him a few moments for the realization to set in.
He managed to wipe the tears away and calm down enough before his Tia opened the door, “Jackie? Are you alright?”
“Yeah, I’m fine.”
Carol still had a worried look on her face, “Are you sure?”
Jackson didn’t want to answer. He felt like his mind wasn’t settled enough for him to not cry, “Yeah, I’m fine.” He glanced at his clock, “I’m sorry, did I wake you up? It’s almost 2 am.”
“Don’t worry, mijo,” she smiled at him and went to leave, “Get some sleep, okay?”
Once she left, Jackson was left alone with his thoughts.
That dream happens once every year on the same day. His mother’s birthday. It was like clockwork.
Yet still had the same effect on him each damn time.
X
When Jackson got to school, he tried so hard to avoid Jolie, Ken and Timothy.
And by “tried so hard”, he means putting a hoodie on and hoping they didn’t spot him.
“Damn, dude,” Ken asked upon seeing him, “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine.”
Timothy snorted, “Those bags under your eyes say otherwise.”
“Pleaseeee?” Ken begged, slinging his arm around Jackson’s shoulders and letting gravity do its thing, almost bringing Jackson down with him, “We won’t tell anyone.”
Jackson gave him a look.
“Promise.”
“Jackson, we just want to make sure you’re okay,” Jolie added, putting a hand on his shoulder, “Whether you choose to tell us is up to you, but just know we’re all here if you want to talk.”
Timothy gave him a hug around the waist, “Yeah, so you’re getting our love either way.”
Jackson thought about it. He did want to tell them. He needed to talk about it. Sure, his tios knew today was hard on him, but it was so much more than that. Jackson missed his childhood and missed his old life with her and missed his mother. It hurt so fucking much.
“Can we go somewhere more private?” Jackson asked, his voice on the verge of breaking. He felt the tears start to well up.
X
“Oh my god, Jack,” Timothy sniffled.
Somehow, Jackson’s sob story about his annual dreams had gotten to all of them, going through a full box of tissues and halfway through the second. They had escaped to Wendy’s room, who was thankfully nowhere to be found.
“It’s fine, it’s been happening for years.” He still remembered the first time it happened. He was so broken afterwards. Refusing to sleep for the next few days unless he passed out. Not talking to anyone and reinforcing his walls, keeping others from becoming too close. He didn’t want to lose anyone like that again. “God, I just feel like I should be over it by now.”
Jolie responded almost immediately. “Jackson, no.”
“But-”
“No.”
“Jackson, this is your mom we’re talking about,” Timothy started, “You’re not going to get over it just because you want it to. It might’ve been years ago, but that doesn’t change the fact that she was the most important person in your life.”
Ken agreed, “And no matter how much time you’re gonna take, we’re gonna be there dealing with your spiky hair and crying with you.”
“Yeah!” Timothy smiled through his tears, “And if there’s anything that we can do to make you less emo, we’ll be there.”
That made Jackson laugh. He knew that already, and knew that they would support him no matter what, “Actually, there might be something that I need help with.”
X
“So, are we cutting the cake or unboxing first?” Jolie asked.
Where were they gonna start? There were so many boxes up in the attic, it was kind of intimidating.
But there was one pile in the corner of the boxes that Jackson was going to open today.
Jackson had been putting this off for years. He had been given his mother’s things when she left, and there was a lot. So each year ever since his mothers death, Jackson would go to these boxes and cut a small cake, hoping that he would finally be able to open them.
But he just couldn’t bring himself to open up those boxes. Any reminder of her just hurt him even more than he already was.
“So,” Jolie put her hands on her hips, “where do we start?”
“Uh, I’m not sure.” He was feeling brave earlier, but now that he was standing in front of them, he didn’t think that he could go through with it.
“Whelp,” Ken stepped forward and sat crisscrossed right in front of the boxes. He looked behind his shoulder at them and patted the space next to them.
Jackson cut the cake, each of them getting a slice. But even after that, Jackson struggled to open a box.
So they sat there. Staring at the boxes. None of them moved. None of them pressured Jackson to hurry up and open one. Just eating the cake and staring at those boxes like it was the most interesting telenovela they’ve ever seen.
It took time. Over an hour, actually. But Jackson lifted one of the boxes and put it right in front of him.
It took more time for him to open the box. With a shaky hand, he lifted his scissors up and slowly cut through the withering tape.
And even after that, he took even longer to even attempt to open it. And yet no one made a move to rush him. They sat there patiently, like they knew what Jackson needed was someone to just be there in the room. Make him feel less alone.
When it was open, Jackson started crying at the sight. He recognized every single thing he saw.
When he pulled out a photo album, he slowly cracked it open to the first page.
“HA- it’s Jackson’s butt!” Ken was the first one to break the silence.
Oh god, it’s all of my baby pictures.
“You know what?” Jackson said nervously, “Maybe we shouldn’t go through this one.”
“Oh hell no. We’re going through them,” Timothy declared.
Jackson said sayonara to his dignity and opened the book once more.
X
They did end up getting through all those boxes. There were definitely a lot of Jackson’s old embarrassing photos he wished they hadn’t seen, but it was something he needed to do. And he was positive that it wouldn’t have happened without the support he had right now.
So even if Jackson wasn’t okay right now, he would be.