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feeling real

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(See the end of the work for notes.)

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They've been dancing like this for a while.

The music from the radio sounded bleak to the empty thoughts running through his head. The rain outside numbed the atmosphere, dressing the entire apartment in a grey-ish hue, way too dark for midday.

Everything felt quiet and still.

It was it's own sense of silence. A peaceful one.

The truth is, he hadn't realized when he was brought to an embrace.

But here they were now. Awkwardly dancing to eachother's rhythm.

The woman holding him was gently swaying to the melody coming from the speaker- slightly moving his waist whenever she did so.

She would occasionally hum to the tune of the song. Perhaps she was familiar with it. Perhaps he knew it too, but couldn't recognize it yet. He was already distracted enough.

He felt too self-consious. In turn, that was translated in the way he kept himself.

But despite the stiffness in his shoulders, he felt secure. Comfortable with the flow he followed.

The only thing that felt confusing was how to move next. 

Her manner was relaxed as she laid her head on his chest. While that made him feel more tense, it somehow put him at ease.

Still, it felt quite unreal, or maybe he was the one who didn't feel present enough. 

There was a question that bugged him. Though he felt it'd be better if he made it earlier, it was too much to hold back. 

Eventually he slightly towered his upper-body over her head, trying his best to keep her close; the thought of wrapping his arms around her was enough to make him flustered.

"Am I...doing this right?" , he asked as he sheepishly looked at the floor. 

The woman snickered at the question as she held onto his coat, like she was clenching it it for support. 

"You're so awkward." she said with a smile. A kind one rather than that of mockery.

Her soft expression caught him off-guard.

"You're...-" he muttered. He didn't attempt to finish his sentence.

"It's just ,,funny you'd worry about something like that." she continued, breaking the momentary pause as her fingers curled on his coat.

"Does it feel right to you?" her arm slowly rose, extending towards his face.

He was so surprised by the physical exchange, he could only stare at her. But he didn't let that phase his expression much.

"It feels stupid." he demurely replied.

"Is that so?" she asked humorously, as she proceeded to caress his cheek.

"Mm." he laid his head on her hand, closing his eyes as he did, only to stare at the floor again.

A wider smile formed on her lips, her eyes had a warm glimmer to them.

"You're wonderful..." the words that jumped out of her mouth caught Jotaro off his zone; his eyes immediatly driven back to her direction. Her expression was calm, with her eyes also looking at the floor now, as if she was in a haze. And as the silence returned to the room the humming begun again. It felt so out of place yet,

the simplicity of this moment was enough to make him realize the space he was filling in the room.

Notes:

didn't take this too seriously tbh. it's a start I guess??(?)