Chapter Text
Katsuki is currently 13 and absolutely done with this mandatory doctor’s visit.
Currently he’s sitting on the edge of an exam table, the weird wax paper esc sheet crinkling horribly under him, while the doctor talks about his secondary gender to his parents. He already knows what it is of course. He’s an alpha, the ‘best secondary gender’ or whatever the fuck his teachers at Aldera say.
Personally he doesn’t give a damn, who the fuck cares what your secondary gender is? If you’re not boring as shit then what does it matter? Or it shouldn’t matter, he’s not even sure why he cares but alpha feels… wrong? He doesn’t get it, he’s not even sure he wants to get it. All he needs is for the weird buzzy feeling that makes him want to climb out of his own skin to just stop it. He hates it so. Fucking. Much.
Why doesn’t he like his secondary gender? Why does he feel wrong? Why does he want to hide, to climb out of his body and find a better one? Why doesn’t he want to be an alpha? It shouldn’t be bad news, should it? He’s not fucking sexist or anything, so why does being an alpha seem so wrong? It doesn’t make sense to him, is there something wrong with hi-
“Alright firecracker, are you ready to go home?” Masaru asked.
Oh. Has he really been sitting here, lost in thought that long? “Fuckin’, yeah. Let’s go old man.” Katsuki huffed, quickly hopping down from the exam table. Masaru smiled fondly at him before turning around so Katsuki could follow him out the room's door and to the front desk. Mitsuki was already there paying for the visit.
Katsuki didn’t feel particularly chatty, and just wanted to get to the car, so he turned to his dad and held out his hand expectantly. Masaru turned to him and gave a soft hum before grabbing the car keys from his back pocket; the brunette set the keys in his palm. He gave a grunt that roughly translated to ‘thanks’ before walking out the front doors.
Once out front he took a deep breath, hoping to settle the mess of emotions weighing heavily in his gut, and clicking the unlock button on the keychain. He waited for the signature handful of beeps before walking towards the noise.
After he got into the backseat he plopped the keys on the top of the center console while closing the door. It didn’t take very long for him to hear his mothers frustrated ranting through the car door, signifying their arrival. Katsuki pulled out his phone and earbuds, quickly plugging them in and shuffling his playlist to, hopefully, avoid conversation. Making sure to grab his belt and buckle up before his parents got in.
The hag hopped into the driver's seat while his old man got onto the passenger side. Katsuki wasn’t sure what they were talking about, some trip that’ll last days to weeks at a time if he had to guess, but it didn’t really matter.
He spent the drive back to his house trying to figure out why the mere thought of being an alpha makes his skin buzz. Maybe he just doesn’t like the thought of dealing with ruts? I mean, that sounds right, but that doesn’t feel.. it? Like that only feels like the start of a puzzle, a very frustrating puzzle that his emotional constipation is getting in the way of.
Eventually they pull into the driveway and Katsuki books it out of the car, wanting nothing more than to avoid his parents. Not that it's very hard as they rarely even acknowledge his existence, but this feels like one of those rare occasions. He removed his shoes at the genkan and slid into the house slippers. Then the blonde all but bolted up to his room.
Katsuki made sure to softly close and lock his door, not wanting to draw any unwanted attention. Stepping back into his room he took off his house slippers and socks while looking around. All in all it was pretty bare, especially for a teenager. There were a handful of All Might posters, an All Might figure, a custom Eraserhead pin attached to his blackout curtains with an official Present Mic one, and smaller posters of various Pro Hero’s. The smaller posters consisted of Miruko, Hawks, Gang Orca, Best Jeanist, Present Mic and a hand drawn Eraserhead one.
Katsuki remembers when he drew that one. He was, what, seven? The memories kinda blurry but he’s pretty sure he saw Eraserhead somewhere and decided he was a good hero.
He turned to his phone and paused his music. Pulling his earbuds from his ears and twisting them around his phone before shoving it into his front pocket.
The blonde turned to his desk chair where his backpack was sitting, he hadn’t got the chance to unpack it before they were off to the shitty doctors office. Speaking of which, he’s supposed to present soon. Or, well, properly present. It’s fucking bullshit, in his opinion, that he hasn’t ‘properly presented’ because he hasn’t had the weird faux-rut. Female omega’s and male alpha’s don’t go through any major changes, just developing scents, instinct and all that dumb shit.
Apparently your hormones start changing around 8 to 10 years old, so all that’s pretty much left when you present is the physical shit. Like how male omega’s go through their first ‘heat’ developing a set of… other parts. Female alphas go through basically the same thing with their first ‘rut’ , just on the exact opposite of the spectrum. Beta’s bodies simply change slightly over time, gaining a faint scent, weak instincts and the ability to smell other people’s scents, there’s no presenting for them.
The first ‘heat’ or ‘rut’ isn’t really a heat or rut. From what Katsuki’s heard it’s just a painful process of your body shifting and developing faster than usual. He’s not excited if you couldn’t tell.
Katsuki walked over to his desk to pick up his backpack from the chair to rummage through it for the homework. He grabbed it and half heartedly threw the papers onto his desk, he turned to his desk drawer and opened it. Pulling out his laptop, highlighters, calculator, mechanical pencil and lined paper, he heavily plopped down onto his chair to start on it. Contrary to what some might think he didn’t enjoy homework, however it’s a very welcome distraction right now.
About an hour later he was finished. With nothing better to do he went on his laptop to try and figure out the weird feelings he had earlier today. Katsuki still kinda felt them, sticking to the back of his mind like thick syrup. It took him a bit,
a lot
,
of failed and definitely questionable searches, but he eventually found what he was looking for.
‘Trans Youth: Regarding Secondary Gender’ was the title of the article. It was.. pretty helpful actually. Some of it didn’t quite make sense, he assumed this was because he hadn’t had enough time to feel all the.. emotions . He shuddered, fuck emotions, they were useless and uncomfortable.
The article pointed out things like dysphoria, hormone therapy, binding and packing, surgeries, the dangers to doing certain things improperly and not doing proper research into doctors. It also noted that it isn’t the same for everybody, that some people simply felt like another gender and didn’t really want any surgeries or anything like that, while others feel extremely dysphoric and get all the surgeries and hormones.
After all that Katsuki was pretty confident in saying he was trans, or something like it atleast. Or he was pretty confident, until he remembered he didn’t know what secondary gender sounds right.
Which caused him to launch into even more research.
He decided to start on beta’s first. Researching any habits they might have, how they experience things differently from omegas or alphas, any bodily differences, how they’re seen stereotypically and all that shit. It was pretty interesting actually.
Some things he already knew, like how betas have scents and pretty mild instincts. Other things he didn’t know anything about, like how betas scents can’t change to their emotions and that they have an inner beta. Betas are stereotypically seen as boring, working office or fast food jobs, bland, don’t stand out much yadda yadda yadda.
Betas physical bodies are the same as omegas and alphas before presentation, so it’s not hard to imagine how he might look as a beta. Their instincts tend to lean more towards possessiveness or protectiveness, and mold to the people and experiences around them. There’s a whole research thing on it, it’s pretty damn interesting.
However it doesn’t sound right, but doesn’t sound wrong either? Like alpha sounds wrong and it makes him feel wrong. Beta sounds the same way as if he were to refer to himself as a girl, it doesn’t bother him but it’s definitely not right.
Next he moved onto nonbinary, this one was fairly self explanatory. They just don’t feel like they have a secondary gender, or something like that. They’re not an alpha, beta or omega in the same way that someone who’s primary gender’s nonbinary isn’t a girl or boy. These people also use the term delta.
Deltas sometimes get surgeries to remove their scent glands, it helps with dysphoria apparently. They may also get top or bottom surgery or beta hormones. Apparently beta hormones dull the effect of omega or alpha hormones, they have effects in common with hormone blockers apparently. Also hella interesting.
Deltas share a lot of shit with trans people, it makes sense in retrospect. Deltas do fall under the trans umbrella after all.
Still doesn’t feel right, like Katsuki wouldn’t mind being referred to with they/them pronouns, but that’s for primary genders. Being referred to as ‘delta’ isn’t right, feels worse then being called a beta but not as bad as alpha.
Which brings him to his last few options, omega or genderfluid.
Genderfluid is entirely a possibility still, maybe he’ll feel for alpha or delta tomorrow or something. He’s never paid that much attention to his genders or sexuality so he wouldn’t really know.
However he decided to research omega first. He went with the same plan as beta, habits, behaviors, instincts, scents, differences, stereotypes etcetera.
Things that he knew were along the lines of nests and wanting to take care of their friends and family. Things that were new however was the fact that omegas have small fangs that only pop out when feral and that omegas can be extremely possessive of their things.
Katsuki’s slightly ashamed to admit that the only reason that the last fact really surprised him was because he kinda listened to the stereotypes. In his defense the only omegas he’s really met are Auntie Inko and the old man, and they pretty much fit the stereotypes.
There were a couple things that really stood out to him, things that sounded… nice? Like nests, taking care of people and purring. He’s not sure why the last one stuck out to him, but it does? Like the alpha equivalent to a purr is a chuff, and he doesn’t want to make that sound. Now that he thinks about it any alpha sounds coming from him sounds like torture.
God why couldn’t he have omega sounds.
…
Wait .
WAIT .
Katsuki leaned back in his chair rubbing his sore eyes. Fuck the blue screen effect bullshit. He let his hands fall down to his sides as he stared at his ceiling with a soft annoyed groan. Why does it feel so obvious now? Like realistically he couldn’t have known, and he knows, deep down, that he’s grateful for this research anyway. But now that it’s done he feels like wasted, what, hours?
The blonde lifted his head furrowing his eyebrows in irritation. Roaming his eyes around the screen until they fell to the bottom right to look at the time. Only to realize his eyes hurt more than they probably should. Finally he sat up properly to scrub at his eyes with the side of his fists, only to stop as he felt something move .
He panicked briefly, trying to connect the dots on what the actual fuck was in his eye, when it clicked. His fucking contacts. It’s official, Katsuki’s a moron and up way past his bedtime.
Katsuki got up with a small grumble before silently opening his door and walking out. As soon as he got to the hall bathroom he closed and locked the door. He had to take a hot second after flicking on the light to get used to it. After that he walked up to the mirror and opened it, revealing a handful of shelves. He grabbed the small, two circle shaped container and some eye drops.
He closed the mirror and leaned in close to carefully take the contacts out, after they were out he opened both sides of the container and slipped them in. He quickly picked up the eyedrops and held each respective eye open to put them in. Blinking in quick succession he glanced around the blurry bathroom before landing on two orange, blurry and thin, donut shapes connected together on a line. Picking those up he unfolded the arms and put them on his face.
He looked up into his reflection and blinked a few times. Just then he remembered his phone and earbuds in his front pocket and brought them out to set them on the counter. Then he puts the contacts and drops away before showering, and brushing his teeth.
Katsuki wrapped the towel around his waist, bringing his hands up to his hair and letting off small explosions to instantly dry it while achieving his signature style. Snatching his phone off the counter, and his clothes off the floor, he turned to the door and left.
Walking back to his room, entering, setting his earbuds plus phone on his desk and getting dressed in pajamas was about as entertaining as you think. His pajamas consisted of a gray, loose tank top and soft, black sweatpants. Going over to his desk to close his tabs, power off his computer, plugging it in as well as his phone, quickly skimming his homework to make sure he didn’t miss anything and then putting it into his backpack. He set the bag back on his desk chair and straightened his desk back up, gathering his Aldera uniform and setting that on top of his desk, along with his glasses, for tomorrow.
Once that was over he took his towel and clothes to his hamper and dropped them inside. He snuck back out of his room to the hall closet and grabbed a towel to replace his previous one. Walking back to the bathroom he placed the towel back onto the rack, leaving for the last time that night and walking back to his room.
Finished with his task of preparing for tomorrow, he’d make his breakfast and lunch in the morning, he walked over to his bed and promptly fell. Grabbing onto one side of the blanket then rolling so he was completely wrapped, he set the side of his head down on his pillow and almost instantly passed out.
When Katsuki finally woke up it was to the alarm clock he simultaneously regrets and is very grateful for buying. Getting up he lazily swiped his glasses, earbuds and phone off his desk. Turning he gave a glare to his alarm clock. It just blinked 5:30 A.M back at him while singing in its god awful, fire alarm screech. The blonde slapped the top of the alarm with a hiss, effectively quieting the damned thing.
Dragging his feet Katsuki put his house slippers and socks back on and opened his door, going downstairs to the fridge, he grabbed the thermos of iced water from inside before forcing himself to commit to his 30 minute run. Heading over to the front door Katsuki swapped from his house slippers to his sneakers.
Opening the door and taking his first step outside only to get hit with the morning chill wasn’t exactly what he’d call ‘encouragement’. He shivered slightly as he looked to the sky, it’d have color bleeding into it any minute now.
Looking down to jog off his small porch and down the few steps onto the sidewalk. Katsuki looked back up while putting in his earbuds and slipping his phone into his pocket. God, why did he have to choose such a demanding future job?
Once he got back a few things changed, for one it was 6:03 and for two he was fucking
freezing
. He took a couple gulps of his way too cold water. Crouching, and setting the bottle onto the ground, he quickly took off his sneakers and pulled on his slippers.
After that he promptly stood up, rushing to put the bottle on the kitchen counter and all but jumping up the stairs to the hall bathroom. Once in he quickly stripped, placing his glasses phone and earbuds in the same spot as before, and turned the water all the up. Luckily it didn’t take long at all to warm so he took his shower pretty fast.
Grabbing the towel he placed onto the rack last night and wrapping around his waist once done. He opened the mirror cabinet and grabbed his contacts and drops, putting his contacts in then the eyedrops and blinking rapidly. He grabbed his clothes, phone and earbuds then put the eye drops and contacts container back.
Exiting the bathroom and going back to his room he walked over to his desk to grab his uniform. Putting it on and undoing the first few buttons because he hates things touching his neck. He grabbed his bag, putting his phone and earbuds into it, before heading downstairs.
Going over to the kitchen and giving a glance to the stove clock told him it was 6:30. 30 minutes left to make breakfast and lunch before he had to start heading to school. Something simple and easy then. Looking into the fridge Katsuki gathered ingredients to make a quick miso soup. It’d be good for breakfast and lunch.
Around fifteen minutes later Katsuki had a bowl sized thermos filled with miso soup in his backpack and was sitting at the kotatsu eating. Once he finished he got up and washed his bowl before putting on the drying rack. Drying his hands Katsuki quickly went over a mental list to make sure he had everything.
Once satisfied he grabbed his backpack and his water, going back to the fridge to open the freezer and grabbing a couple ice cubes. Dropping them in the cup and heading over to the sink to refill the thermos. Swinging the bag over in front of him to put the bottle in the side pouch, he swung it back to put on both shoulders and headed to the front door.
Putting his sneakers back on he glanced at the stove, the clock barely visible. 6:52 eight minutes to spare. Fuck yeah. He headed out to school, a small smirk on his face ready to fuck shit up, when it hit him. Deku knows he was supposed to get his secondary gender shit yesterday. And knowing that nosey fuck he’s gonna want answers , and if he asks people are bound to over hear in turn making them ask.
Fuck.