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The day felt excruciatingly long, and Barnaby was fairly certain he ached in places that shouldn't ache. Then again, even Saito's suits could only soften being thrown through a wall so much. The one thing occupying his mind as he showered and refused to inspect the extent of his own bruising was how much he looked forward to sitting on Kotetsu's couch and doing absolutely nothing all evening. The plants were more than fine until the next day.
Oddly enough, the man seemed to sense as much, though that may have come from the mild limp the blond just couldn't hide. No matter; he was greeted at the door with a familiar smile and the promise of a "new recipe" for fried rice. Which, in Kotetsu's world, meant the same fried rice with one different or new ingredient, but Barnaby didn't have a single complaint to make about that. Quips, sure. Jokes ever so slightly at the older man's expense, always; but nothing mean-spirited, nothing he truly meant to be taken seriously. It was all part of that feeling of...
Home. He hesitated to so much as think the word. Like it could be in danger of being taken away if he didn't protect it. And yet right then, right there, as he carefully took his boots off at the door and settled into what was becoming a suspiciously worn groove in the couch, into something which may be labeled "his spot", much like there was a mug in the kitchen that was "his" and a toothbrush set aside for him in the bathroom with no questions asked, it was all so perfectly welcoming. Routine in a way that had nothing to do with boredom, light years away from something he could ever take for granted, he leaned back into the cushions and closed his eyes.
Barnaby almost missed the fact that Kotetsu had simply settled in the space next to him until he felt the cushion dip beside him. He waited for a few seconds, eyes still closed, not sure how seriously to take the fact that the other man wasn't cooking and filling the space with pleasant rambling and laughter. Not that it was an uncomfortable silence, but it seemed to be building into a poignant one. Finally green eyes opened, head turning lazily to peer over.
The soft smile was immediate, but it was clear that Kotetsu was thinking. Working something out, reasoning through an idea as he glanced away for a few seconds. Then he nodded ever so slightly to himself, coming to a decision. Instead of starting with words, he reached to place his hand on top of Barnaby's, trying not to be too obvious about waiting for a reaction.
Well. That was new. Barnaby had become used to close contact, to Kotetsu throwing an arm around his shoulders and pulling him in sometimes, or to being directed somewhere by a warm, firm grasp of his shoulders. He didn't mind, exactly, but he did hold to silence, waiting for an explanation.
That much took another few seconds, Kotetsu feeling out the words as he went. "I had a dream last night."
Explaining nothing, really. Or maybe explaining everything. The blond's hand remained where it was, soaking up the warmth from calloused skin above. "Oh?"
"Mm." The words were casual enough, tone conversational; even if the younger man hadn't been watching, head still slightly tilted back against the top of the couch cushion, he'd have heard the smile. "I was... visiting Tomoe's grave. Wasn't scary or anything. Or sad, even. She, uh. She was there. And she was mad at me."
It was certainly in bad form to laugh, but Barnaby couldn't help the short bark of a sound even if it was louder to his own ears than his partner's. Before he could be too mortified with himself, Kotetsu's answering laugh smoothed whatever anxiety had started to surface. Still, it felt only polite to offer up a quiet, "Sorry."
"'Sfine, I've been used to it." The older man grinned, pleased that he'd surprised yet another short and very un-Barnaby-like laugh out of the blond. He waited a few seconds to continue, thumb unconsciously starting to move lightly over a knuckle. "I asked her why she was angry, if it was something I did. She said it was something I wasn't doing." Kotetsu paused, finally realizing the motion of his thumb, glancing down at their hands. Barnaby's hadn't moved. His thumb stayed still for another few seconds before lightly tracing its way along the younger man's finger as he talked. "She asked me why happiness was right in front of me, but I wouldn't take it."
There was a-- Tingle. Starting at the back of Barnaby's neck, rolling down his spine. A warmth. Maybe it shouldn't have been a good thing, but it felt like... it felt like getting someone to look at him. Someone he really wanted to look at him, to see him. But then that was probably wrong, or he was mistaken, or--
"It was weird, you know?" Kotetsu went on, voice softer as his gaze remained on their hands. "I told her I didn't understand what she was saying, that I was happy, but she... she always knew. She knew this time, too." He took a breath to steel himself, glancing up at Barnaby. He really had no idea how to interpret the look on the younger man's face, stunned or surprised or... Not afraid, though. That would have stopped him right away, would have gotten him to pull back. He could take the form of a battering ram any old time, sure, but not there. Not with that. But he did know that he needed to continue before he lost his nerve. "She told me I should just reach out and take hold of happiness already."
Barnaby went very still when the other man squeezed his hand. He was grateful that Kotetsu obviously ignored the tension, or was more likely simply weathering it. Waiting for him to think himself around the words, to reason them out in his own head, come up with an argument maybe. The thing was, he couldn't. There wasn't one, and he didn't want to try. It wasn't a revelation, exactly, and he'd even gone a little past the point of confirmation if he were forced to think about it. They'd spent a lot of time picking their way through one another's thorns. Outward and inward. Sometimes getting themselves cut while clearing out the bramble, but never giving up.
Even after all that time, Kotetsu couldn't always say that he had a single clue what his partner was thinking. Sometimes it was a total mystery, unknown to him, and while he was glad to give Barnaby the privacy and space he needed for something that important, the silence was also making him nervous. Not "I just fucked up our entire friendship" nervous, but more like the "I just stuck both feet in my mouth at the same time and I can't even hop away now" variety. If that. Made sense. "So. What do you say, Bunny?"
The prompting got a swallow, the blond taking a moment to admire the ceiling before leaning heavily to the side and ultimately leaning against Kotetsu. Lucky for him that the older man's shoulder was just right for resting his cheek on at that angle. "I say she was obviously the smart one in the relationship."
Didn't take his hand back, check. Actually purposely leaned against him in a way that seemed really difficult to misinterpret, check. Still, though. "Heh, yeah. I mean, uh... you could be the smart one, too..."
It was a shame that his epic eye roll was missed, but Barnaby was pretty sure he projected it in all directions somehow. "Guess I have been for a while, haven't I?"
After a second of silence, Kotetsu's outburst of laughter remained low and soft as if he were afraid of startling... well, a bunny. "Alright, point. But, you wanna make it official? Partners-partners? Double-partners?"
"Please never use that phrasing again." The younger man started to protest, unfortunately aware of the smile in his own voice, the lightness in his chest. And of course the way he shifted to turn his hand, returning the hand holding. "By 'official' do you mean telling Nathan?"
"By 'official' I mean telling Kaede and Ma." Kotetsu corrected. "I'd bet money that Nathan already knows somehow. I mean, more than they already did."
"Mm." It wasn't that Barnaby felt sleepy, just... content. More content than he had in a long time. But there was still dinner to take care of... "You want to order in, instead?"
The idea was instantly grasped on to. "Yeah. That noodle place you liked, with all the vegetable stuff. Good date food, right?"
Barnaby snorted. "Perfect date food. But I get to pick the movie."
"You'll want a romcom." Kotetsu couldn't really find it in him to make the accusation sound like a complaint.
"Better than a horror movie." The blond argued firmly. Both still on the couch, leaned against each other, holding hands. Seemed like maybe that was the only thing that had really changed. Or, well. Maybe not the only thing, as Barnaby took a chance and turned his head, getting their first awkward kiss out of the way. It helped when it came to the next several that followed.