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Olu had never been so at peace, but he couldn’t sleep. It was late at night. He could feel the ships gentle rocking and Jim’s steady breathing beside him. The two were together on the bed in their room, which was far too small for the both of them. They liked it that way, though. The closeness was safe and warm. The room could get cold some nights. Olu spent most nights thinking himself to sleep about all of the things that came to his mind during the day.
As he tried to drift off, the usual nightly thoughts turned into fleeting anxieties. Drifting into his mind one after another. Why don’t I know Jim? He thought. He knew Jim, but at the same time he barely did at all. He knew that they were from Saint Augustine, he knew that their favorite color is teal, he knew about some specific parts of their past. But, he wanted to know them on a deeper level. He worried that asking questions would upset Jim or make it seem like he was trying to pry.
“Olu, go to bed.” Jim’s voice, raspy with sleep, interrupted the silence.
“Didn’t know you were up.” Olu replied.
“I wasn’t, but you’re thinking so loud and that woke me up.” Jim looked at Olu, their round eyes shining, contrasting the darkness of the room.
“Bullshit.” Olu forced a laugh. His partner was not buying it.
“Qué pasa?” Jim sat up.
“It’s nothing, really.” Was the response. “Kind of stupid… just nighttime anxieties.” The other person just glared at him, waiting for more. “Fine- sometimes I wish I knew some more about you.” Oluwande huffed with both embarrassment and relief.
“Like what?”
“Anything, really.” He thought for a second. “Just. Something stupid and mundane.”
Jim sat in silence for a minute, thinking. “I’ve always wanted to go to Italy.” The statement was perfectly mundane, but opened a world of new information.
“Italy… it sounds nice. Cap’n talks about Rome a bunch, that’s in Italy. I think.” Olu smiled. Jim laughed. They usually spend their time acting intimidating and monotone, but when they’re alone with Olu they can really relax. Every time Olu hears Jim’s laugh it makes him want to cry tears of joy. He couldn’t name a more beautiful sound. “I wish living in St. Augustine wasn’t so hard for you. It was nice there. The trees were nice, and those oranges were the best I’ve ever had.”
“The trees?” Jim snickered.
“What? Tree’s are… cool.” Olu said, defending his statement.
“Strange for someone who loves trees so much to live at sea.”
“Well, if I lived in a forest, they wouldn’t be cool anymore. I’d just see ‘em all the time!”
“Eh,” Jim shrugged, only partly understanding. They rolled onto their back and looked at the ceiling. Olu stayed laying on his side, staring at his partner as the shadows caressed their face. After a while, Jim shifted under his gaze.
“You alright?” Olu asked, making sure nothing was wrong.
“No one’s really looked at me the way you do, I guess. I can almost feel it…”
“Sorry, I can stop.” Olu started to turn away.
“Don’t- I mean- you don’t have to. I’m just not used to it…” Their face pinched into an expression that almost made them look… flustered? They fell back into a long silence.
After a while, Olu’s voice seared the cool ocean air. Almost silent, shy and confident at the same time… “I love you, Jim.”
The other froze in place. They’d never felt like they had time for love , but Olu was different. Olu was calm and kind. They honestly had no idea what he saw in them. Jim nearly blushed (and then nearly gagged at the thought that they were capable of blushing). They couldn’t form words, but they couldn’t leave Olu hanging either. After a short period of stammering, they simply leaned forward and pressed their lips to his. The kiss wasn’t long, but it was meaningful. Jim needed the confidence to respond, and kissing Olu was comparable to taking a swig of rum. Olu looked at them, he didn’t mind if they didn’t respond, he didn’t even expect them to. But then, barely a whisper, he heard Jim’s voice.
“I love you too.”