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Chapter Text

They had found the party while foraging. The winter had be upon them faster than any would like, and the seaside haven had not the structure to hold such an influx of people. It was great, but in various conditions from desertion over the years as others migrated further inland to seek fortunes they'd not been able to make at sea. The group was another incoming bundle of banded stragglers. After the destruction of the Southlands and the shadows that crept from its heart, those from the outskirts now also headed to a place rumored to have some stability. The dream was a beacon in a world that was being torn to pieces. But the reality was that Pelargir was not little more than pinned at the seams with the influx of new persons, the shift of the seasons, and the toxicity of run off from the contaminated land draining from the former Southlands bleeding closer to hunting grounds and villages that traded in crops.

Poison wasn't the only cast off from the land. Creatures that were only of bed time horrors started leaking into the land. Theo's arrow had been the one that was responsible for taking down the ravenous creature ready to leap on the boy. Being only a few years younger than the budding archer, the action turned Theo into a demigod to him.

Arondir had splinted the boy's injured leg, and with Theo who had been at his mother's side learning bits and pieces of her trade as long as he could remember, they did their best to treat the other wounds that occurred during the attack and over the course of the group's migration. Even with their combined experience both boy and elf wish the third member of their party had been present. The boy's leg was the least of his injuries.

Many bore cuts and gashes that had already started to fester. The illness in the settlement they were reconstructing into a city was far worse. So Bronwyn had remained adding to a number of healers. Her other waking hours were dedicated to trying to reunite broken families. Both of them had tried to caution her on overwork. Her own healing had progressed slowly from the strain she put on herself. The fear in her voice when she recalled those days when she thought Theo lost to her forever burned as hot today as in the moment of terror. She couldn't bare the thought of another mother's uncertainty.

Their progress back to Pelargir was a slow one. Along the way the boy rarely left Theo's side. He struggled to keep up. His sister, younger by two years, was a constant presence. The trauma made her mind revert to a much younger stage, drawing back into a memory of safety. She had the same dark hair and bright eyes. She had not spoken since they had been separated from their parents but she appeared to be as alert in her gaze as an elf.

Ever so often Theo caught her eyes on Arondir, shifting near constantly from a glare to wonder as if her mind and eyes were in great conflict. He knew that feeling all too well. Theo's chest tightened when he thought of how many years he had hated the elf simply because he was of his kind. He was ashamed at all Arondir had done for him and his mother both that he had failed to see.

The night before they were to arrive at the place they now called home the party were forced to shelter as a gale closed in on them with winds from the north east making passage impossible. Rain pounded down around them. The air roared at the mouth of the cave as loud as any beast that had chased them. When the lightning struck a tree not far from them a scream escaped the girl who had shadowed Theo. She went flying to the closest body. Arondir held her without question. He squeezed her hand. She made to pull away when she realized where she had landed. In the next clash ended up burying her head in his tunic.

When at last they reached the harbor community they made straight for the heart of it. From this center the city slowly grew from a few sturdy buildings. It was petaled with tents around more permanent structures. Further this canvas subsidiary settlement was pushed outward to accommodate more arrivals. Here were the healer's tents and where those in search of lost hope gathered. Vendors stationed between the road to the docks bartering what they could.

When Bronwyn saw them Theo did not need Arondir's hearing to notice how deep her breath of relief was. The dark circles under her eyes were even more pronounced than usual. When had she last slept? Not since they left, he guessed. If she had it was not well.

She all but ran to them. She hugged her son tight. Arondir lingered back, issuing directions though his eyes were never far. Bronwyn's squeeze around him wasn't as lingering as Theo realized he had hoped. Swiftly she was moving to tend to the others. Bronwyn was gently seeing to some blisters on the young girl who had been watching her like a hawk caught awe of the things she had been applying to her brother's injuries. Her brother was close by. Another healer had checked the work that had been done on him. Before Bronwyn could finish the girl's head popped up.

“MOMMA!” She screamed at the top of her lungs and lunged away. Her brother wailed after her, terrified that she was seeing things. It would not be the first time she had been delirious with grief. Theo was near him, seeing his panic at losing the small girl in the crowd. The look on Theo's new companion's face a moment later and the tears that welled up in his eyes showed them all the truth of the matter.

Theo looked back at his mother who remained kneeling. Her hands went to her heart and her mouth. She had always had a tender spirit. It was not a woman's weakness, but a great strength in a world too often cruel. Theo suspected the continual strain and lack of rest made the tears flow as freely as they now. It was rare for anyone to find those they were looking for let alone so soon after arrival.

“She's come every day for a month.” Bronwyn finally choked out as she found her footing and came to join her son. The was a look he barely remembered seeing in her now. Hope. “She said she found her husband yesterday. He'd been working in the south port. She was to bring him here with her today-- perhaps there are still miracles yet.”

Before long the boy was back, dragging Theo to meet his mother and his baby brother. Bronwyn nodded at her son. He was sure to always let her know where he was these days. Theo said it was for her own nerves but in truth it was not pleasant to feel lost. Arondir had was deeper within the crowd now as more flocked to him for guidance. The sea of the sickly was unending. It was Bronwyn's great relief that the foraging party had been able to bring more basic supplies from the forests around them in addition to game. Knowing her sons safety she resumed tending to those around her.

“Bronwyn?” She was treating a head injury and started to see to another when the voice hit her ears. She felt dizzy. Had she stood too fast? When had she last ate? Was this her body's warning, a hallucination? Every muscle tensed. As slow as she could muster she turned her head about her shoulder.

Before her stood a man a head and a half taller than her. His skin was a few shades darker than her own and tanned darker from hours in the sun. It was kissed with the redness and chafing that came of the salty wind whipping up off the coast. His hair was fine. His face and cheeks rounded as near a heart. Deep lines such as her own rested under his eyes. Stubble from a want of a razor left a straggling beard.

Her heart stopped.

“Meilyr.”

“It is you! You've barely changed... You've made it out then. The rest of Hordern? My father?”

“Papa!!” the same excited voice came back at them with as equal glee as when the child who had found her mother spotted Bronwyn's old acquaintance. The man spun around. Laughter ruptured from his barrel of a chest as he scooped the young girl up and spun her around. His older son's voice drifted over the crowds before his body reached them. He was blubbering as he told his father of their escape and proudly of his new hero who came back now to his mother's side.

“Well I suppose I have you to thank for saving my boy. Your parents must be proud of you to have such a warrior.” Meilyr regarded Theo with respect. He was beaming as he hugged his children to him. Theo failed to hide all his pride in the praise.

“I am incredibly proud of him. He's a fine young man. And leader.” Theo's moment of preening ended abruptly.

That was not his mother's voice. Well yes, of course it was. But he had never heard her speak so flat, cold, just this side of a hiss. Not even when she had been directing and commanding when they had first fled for the tower. Certainly she had never spoken to or of him in that tone. Normally Theo would be the first to roll his eyes at her continual praise even if secretly it had always warmed his heart in the end. This...this was something different..

“He—He's yours?” The man looked back and forth between them. Bronwyn stood with her arms held across herself. It wasn't a posture of defiance. It was one of a poise before an attack. Concerned Then edged closer to her, questioning her with his eyes. She didn't look at him once. She reached out blindly, holding Meilyr's gaze, as wrapped her arm around him. She stared daggers at his new follower's father. The man seemed oblivious.

“You... You must have married then. Hah! And when we were younger you said there would never be a day when you would. That a man your father would approve of wouldn't exist.” There was some sort of question, some sort of conversation passing between the two that Theo couldn't grasp.

“No. I never did.” His mother barely moved her jaw as she spoke. She coughed once before turning her words but not attention to her son.

“This is Meilyr. I knew him in my youth. Our fathers were friends.” Her eyes were glass. “This is Theo. “

“Bronwyn?” Arondir had appeared, no doubt hearing the shift in the familiar voice he always monitored. Theo knew the elf's posture well enough to see he was assessing for a threat.

“Would you take Meilyr and his children to where the family units are? There are still some things I need to do here.” Arondir didn't hide his confusion. He seemed nearly as lost as Theo was. The fact Bronwyn, one who was always arm, had such ice in her voice was enough to cause him to treat the other man with skepticism.

“Is Theo coming too?” The boy, despite the joy of the reunion seemed sad at the thought of leaving his new idol. He was oblivious to the tension that strangled the group.

“My son has much left to do here I'm afraid.” Bronwyn voice softened in the end, though barely, when she addressed the children. Clearly she did not hold them accountable for whatever transgression their father must have committed.

“Good health to you Meilyr.” The dismissal was unmistakable. Theo could only stare as the children's father was drawn away, clearly stunned as he urged them to follow the elf. Bronwyn's grip on him grew tighter.

Bronwyn seemed to resume breathing when at last they were out of sight, such calm did not overtake him. She put on a smile too broad to be genuine and set him to a task in a jovial manner and a kiss on the forehead. He was aware that it was less from necessity and more as a tactic to hold his questioning at bay. Though he obeyed, his head pounded with curiosity. His stomach churned with apprehension, even fear. Something in him, some knowledge he felt he was on the cusp of, boiled up towards the surface.

At the same time was the recent memory of the iron of his mother's posture, the bite of her words. It was good enough for him, for now. He would not poke at that which clearly caused her pain. She had only ever withheld parts of her past that would distress him. Theo would have to trust her to speak in her own time. Though as curious as it had been, the underlying dread made Theo uncertain if he truly wished to know.

Chapter Text

Bronwyn didn't need her son or Arondir to tell her she wasn't taking care of herself. Most days she eating enough. She wasn't sleeping enough. Bronwyn was all too aware of the weariness that followed her. It weighed down her very bones.

She would love to ease their worry. She would love to have the time to cook an entire meal, true proper spread, the kind that once the thought of would invoke dread. It would require hours of preparation in their small house. Now it would be a luxury to focus on such a domestic routine.

Bronwyn would love to spend an afternoon just curled up in Arondir's arms. There had been little time alone and at leisure with all the responsibilities that had fallen on them, let alone what was required to repair and enhance their own space. It hadn't been optional in Tirharad. There they had feared it could cost of at the very least their livelihoods. Oh how she longed for a morning to simply doze casually speaking of anything but the city's and the war's burdens, learning the things time had never afforded them.

Begrudgingly she supposed that was a blessing in disguise. Arondir was wrecking the barriers she had put in place to keep her from seeking all of him in the other way she craved. The consequence was too much. It wasn't the possibility of new life. She pined for the feel of a new babe in her arms. Possibly as many women instinctively felt their limited time, but more so that he might have a part of her to treasure when she was gone. That would be a blessing. But to be as his wife, to connect their souls throughout time and condemn him to an eternity of loneliness without a guarantee of even that small grace of a child was far more than Bronwyn could bare.

What kept her from her self care more than a lack of time between them, the inability to wander to watch her son's training with the rest of the young army that he took such pride in, or the conflicting schedules and commitments that kept them in this rotation, was that she simply couldn't now.

Ever since that day Theo and Arondir had returned from scavenging, ever since he had come back, each step was as if she tread on coals. Food turned to ash in her mouth. Her dreams, when she had them, quickly formed into shadowy nightmares. At least she stopped vocalizing them. The scent of her, drenched in sweat and bursting with stress undertones, still woke Arondir. At least Theo could rest in peace in his own space they had separated off in their larger tent.

Bronwyn was constantly on alert. Watching. Waiting. Meilyr would return. He never took things lightly. It was only a matter of time.

Bronwyn hadn't expected the falling lash to come down from a different direction.

The day of dread came on the same that they were to move into the crude home. It was a repurposed shed, really. It was such a far cry form the cozy dwelling she had once filled with her herbs and welcoming hearth with Theo having an entire loft for his own. Still it would do until more permanent structure could be made. New housing construction wasn't as vital if there were adequate numbers of temporary shelter in comparison to fortifying the city and preparing battle structures. This small space was the first time the family had a solid roof over their heads for the first time in months. At the edge of what was considered the well kept part of the city, it was a blessing.

Arondir was with Elendil supervising the new recruits for the makeshift Pelargir-Numenorean military academy. Theo was a top student. As exhausted as she was, and while she wished it was not necessary, she still felt pride in his dedication. It had brought the two loves of her life all the closer.

The knock to their salt breeze worn door was meager. If the wind had been stronger Bronwyn would have never heard it. A patient, young likely, she presumed. What she found instead was Meilyr's wife.

The woman was taller than her. Her hair was a darker shade of blonde kissed with brown undertones and copper highlights. Not a gray could be seen in the mix. Her limbs were willowy with muscle concentrated from frequent handling of growing babes. The weight from her carrying times would have clung a little more, Bronwyn suspected, if not for the hunger abound. Though while most women dreaded this as some husbands were not so keen on the changes of a maid to matron, it gave the other woman a full formed figure that the healer barely thought possible.

She was also younger. Bronwyn had enough youthful vanity that seeing her successor to Meilyr's attentions made her entirely self conscious. She was overconscientious of all the gaps not only between the two of them. It was a reminder of all Bronwyn had lost to time, all that she could not give the elf who slept beside her.

“Heragel?”

“You did not expect me, I see that. Please. For our families, may I come in?” Bronwyn had no quarrel with the woman in the end. It wasn't her fault. If anything, when two of her children and husband were still lost to her, The two had got on quite well.

“He's told you his assumptions then?” Bronwyn asked as she stepped aside and closed the door behind the younger woman. She was both weary and slightly relieved that this might be done with after.

“He has. It's quite hard not to see the resemblance when you know what's before you.” The other woman didn't look directly at her. “Have you told him?”

“No. Theo is intelligent. I suspect he already knows.” It was a relief to be frank.

“Bronwyn... this is not the fault of our children. I... I do not know what precise history you have with my husband. I do not need to know. We all have our pasts. Knowing what cannot be undone does not change the fact that it is.”

“It does not.” Bronwyn pulled her arms around herself. She is so tired. So weary. Her head is pounding as she tries at this woman's game.

“I know you have no intention to rekindle what may have been. Anyone with eyes can see how devoted you are to your...” She searched for a word as they had never presented a label for their cohabitation. “partner. Even if you held onto affection for Meilyr, you are a woman of honor and values. You respect that he has a family.”

“Of course I do.” Bronwyn was settled some by the woman's faith in her character even if she still seemed uneasy, preparing to say something Bronwyn might not find agreeable.

“But the boy has a right to know from where he came.” The wife was firm. “If not for Meilyr's sake, think of Theo! What it must have been like for him all these years. Surely he must be bursting with questions.”

“We were happy enough.” Bronwyn had no cause to be angry with the other woman but the insinuation rubbed her raw. “ I was not perfect but I think I gave him a solid idea of who he was.”

“I do not doubt you did.”

“No, Theo did not have a name. But he knew he was loved, and when I did tell him his history I would have happily told him anything about your husband. He never pressed the issue.”

“Your son loves you. He is more attentive to you than any other his age I've seen. I can only hope my boys will care for me as so when they are the same. Have you considered that he didn't ask out of concern that he might make you have doubts about your own quality?” the woman's words stung. She had thought of this, but Bronwyn couldn't say as much now.

“I can see his gentleness comes from you. Meilyr is a kind man.” Warmth echoed in Heragel's voice for her own love of her husband and to sooth the hurt in Bronwyn's features. “He is, however, more resolute and confident, I think.”

“ Even if Meilyr does factor to you Theo has siblings. They already adore him—Menrin never stops singing his praise. Heradis clings to every word. Dergar is too young to understand but he loves watching how animated his older brother gets. You should have heard him go on about his teacher letting them watch the new recruits training the other day! Why it took quite a scolding to assure him that even if they would lower the age requirement I would not be having him take up a weapon at this time.”

A mist of serenity came over Heragel's eyes. “Hopefully this babe will not know a world without their entire family.” The woman's hand went to hover above her womb. What color was left in Bronwyn's face drained from her. The emptiness of her own body pried at the hole in her heart.

Of course she would also have this. Bronwyn sighed heavily. Blindly her hand searched for the stool she knew was behind her. She sank down on it. The last of her reserves had depleted. She motioned to the other woman. She without the strength to properly host. “What is it you want of me Heragel? What is your purpose in this?”

“I want Theo to dine with us tonight. I want him to have a chance to know us as a family. Meilyr is so alive, so warm, with us. I want him to see his father at his best.” Her words were staggered showing hesitation. “And... should he enjoy our company... I'd like him to stay with us. For more than an evening. At least with regularity.”

“Excuse me?” Bronwyn stood so quickly that her seat crashed to the floor. Its rattling roll across uneven floorboards shattered the air like a scream. Heragel did not flinch. Her own expression turned grim.

“If Theo is as content as you said, I don't see what you have to fear. Bronwyn, please. I too am a mother. I am a refugee as much as you without even your skill to help support my family. My life is as uncertain as your own. I do not relish the thought of another body in our small space or a mouth to feed. Every child is a gift, but the price of that joy still has a strain of heart and a need of wealth. All the same, a whole family is far more important than abundance.”

Nails dug into the palms of her hands. Bronwyn's jaw set like steal. Meilyr wasn't the only passionate one. For many years Bronwyn had struggled with the thought of darkness running in her veins, of inescapable evil as was said to be in her ancestors. She had learned to dismiss that. But she was grateful for the unmistakable fire that did pass through her blood.

“How can Theo leaving those he calls, that IS, his family for a stranger who ran off before he even knew he fathered a child possibly be best for my son?” Bronwyn's voice started in a shout. Cautious of crowded space and thin walls brought her sentence to an end at a lower register.

“We may not have much now, but Meilyr had standing in our village. He is a craftsman.” Heragel masked any offense under an even tone. She tried to be pragmatic.

“When this war is over, what then? What will Theo do? Meilyr could teach him his trade. My husband has already done quite well even under these circumstances. We're set to see a small home near the port sector he's been working on tomorrow in fact.” That news cut almost as deeply as anything else. Bronwyn had not missed look of the younger woman assessing the accommodations around her.

It took an incredible amount of influence or holdings to secure any of the more formal structures that had existed before the migration. You did not see a house without being prepared to submit an offer. You would not even be entertained to the privilege of a viewing without strong connections. Yes, Arondir figured highly in the war and defense plans. But the established residents and merchants saw the influx as much of a burden as the sign of an unpreventable doom. New faces left sour tastes in the mouths of those of stable wealth.

“Theo would be skilled in trade as well as quick minded. Imagine the life he could build for himself! He's almost a man grown. We'd see to a dowry for whatever bride he chose.” She argued before more gently adding. “He would be such a good influence on my eldest. In this short time, injured as he is, Menrin's never been more serious about his contribution to the household and his future than ever before. Do you know what it took to get him to study his figures before we came here? To show any interest in any sort of profession? That is because of your son. That ethic is from both his parents, I think, and I am so thankful for it!”

“ Let Theo take the roll he was meant to have! Let him more than a normal family. Let him full future. He has the potential to be a great leader in his community. Let his siblings be his practice of nurturing and motivating. Please, Bronwyn. Do what's best for our children. It's not as if we ask to whisk him away. He will be close.”

Only wind could be heard as Heragel's speech came to a close. Bronwyn fought to turn her emotions solid, cold, into a stone.

“I... I would like you to leave now.” Bronwyn choked through depleted lungs.

“Bronwyn....”

“Please.” The healer begged. Willing her voice not to crack. Heragel stood and went to the door. She paused looking back at the older woman.

“Will you consider it? May I tell my husband that?”

Bronwyn wanted to scream. She wanted to rage at the audacity of the suggestion. Yet Heragel did not seem presumptive. She had been logical and, though Bronwyn's brain desired to say other wise, Heragel did seem sincere in her reasoning. Her motivation was loving.

“It is as you said. Theo is near enough a man grown. I will discuss the meal with him.” the words were salt in mouth sores.

“ If Theo decides not to go I will have him send word all the same. He may make up his own mind to the rest of it.” Satisfied and whispering gratitude Heragel softly closed the door as she exited.

The adrenaline died as Bronwyn counted slowly down in her head to make certain that the other left and was away. Anger burned off, frittering away at the armor she had donned. Bronwyn lost all grip. She crumpled to the floor. Her eyes fixed with fog in front of her. How could this be? How the reality be worse than all the nightmares that had plagued her? Bronwyn had rebuild herself when she moved to Tirharad before Theo's birth. She was doing it again after the great destruction. Now her world was crumbling apart yet again. How many times could one heart be patched?

Chapter Text

The laughter that came from his chest was deep and full. Theo had almost forgotten the sound of it himself. It was strange. His home was gone. They were technically at war. Their accommodations were bare. And there was a third person who shared the space of two he had grown up with, a person he used to revile. Somehow Theo was happier than he'd ever been, maybe.

He had friends, more than he ever dreamed of in Tirharad. More than that. He had people who envied or admired him which, okay, maybe that isn't something he should brag about. Didn't mean that it didn't feel awesome.

Of course it wasn't universal. Some of his fellow cadets whispered behind his back. They said he was only advancing because Arondir took special interest in him. Since Arondir was giving him special treatment Captain Elendil was as well since officers stuck together. Theo didn't let those words stick. He knew his worth. He wasn't the best, but he was good. He also put in more effort than a fourth of them combined by the look of it. He couldn't really blame the others though. Those were the people that would be frozen by the fear of the battle on the other side of their graduation.

It wasn't that Theo ignored the war. He wished he could forget it. It was a constant thump in the back of his head like a migraine ready to creep up. It was that he had already known the metallic taste of terror. He had survived things that would give him nightmares all his days. Theo had simply accepted that the war was coming for them and he'd rather be prepared than the helpless boy he had felt like when all this began.

The sun was low in the sky. He was sore and in desperate need of a bath. But he had a late start tomorrow and Arondir didn't have patrol. That meant the elf would stick close at least through their meager dinner. It was strange having him around so much. But also, it hinted at something that had been missing from his life for as long as he knew.

He used to dream about having a 'real' family. He never said it to his mother, of course. He knew she struggled to provide for them and as he got older he felt the guilt she carried over her marital status. She felt that she had made her son an outcast because of her own choices. Both of them, but she had never been one to focus much on herself. At least not outwardly.

It's not that the elf had suddenly been the answer to all their dreams. He was still uncomfortable with a lot of human traits and ways. There was an awkward dance between the three of them to figure out just where he fit into the family. Theo didn't really have a name or title to put on him. All he knew was he liked it when he was around. There was an extra layer of stability.

It was good for his mother too. She was so worn out these days. For years she had been running on everyday or calamity stress really. When Arondir was around she seemed to be able to breathe a little easier. He had even heard her laughing a few times. Not much recently, but when they first came to the city. She deserved to be happy. She deserved something for herself, to worry and care about her. His mother was too feisty to ever be 'taken care of'. Theo could never imagine her being like some of the mothers that were simply homemakers.

She may have a more traditional trade as a woman, but he never doubted there was anything she couldn't do that most men could except maybe when it came to some feats of strength. He'd come home more than once to see her splitting wood, fixing a fence, or patching the roof the best she could. It might not be completely up to snuff but she'd give it a go long before trying to find the resources and convincing someone to come help. Sure she could be overbearing and he'd be happy if he never had to spend another day with a mortar in his life but the older he got the more he appreciated and understood just how much she had done on her own.

The jovial mood he was in died as they approached their new makeshift home. With the failing light, his mother would usually have a lantern going. It was possible that she had to run to the sick tents and thought she would have been back in time. Or she could have wandered to the storage and apothecary center. Still this was strange.

It wasn't odd for her not to be home when he came home. Bronwyn was constantly working these days despite both his and Arondir's protest. She had conceded at least to break to be with them in the evening for some time. Still even during previous emergencies she had never forgotten to put on a light outside just in case. Something was gnawing at Theo's gut. He glanced at Arondir. The elf was as tense as Theo felt. That could not be a good sign.

“Mother?” He called as he opened the unlatched door.

The room was dark with the growing shadows. The fire was little more than embers. There was no bubbling or scent coming from the pot over it. There was a basket of wash unfolded near the door. The pot she used to water the indoor plants as she waited for dinner to cook every night was still full from the well. He wouldn't have blamed her for rebelling and taking a day for herself. He had even suggested to the collective horror of them all that he try to cook for them one evening. This was not that. This was all wrong.

The stone grew heavier in him as he finally saw her at their table. She looked absolutely haggard as she stared blankly out the window into the sunset. Bronwyn hadn't even flinched at their entering. Her chin sat in her hand. She was caught in a daze.

In the dim light he didn't need Arondir's eyes to tell that she had been crying. She hadn't even bothered to try to hide it like she usually did. Theo looked quickly towards the elf at his side who was there for only a beat before he went to Bronwyn's side in a flash. Arondir knelt beside her trying to gain her attention and ask what tilled her that strange wordless way he had. Bronwyn simply squeezed the hand that had clasped her limp one in a response of life.

“Theo, love. We need to talk.” Her voice was as hoarse and raw. When at last she ignored the elf to look directly at him he noticed redness his saw in her eyes through the fading light. “I had a visitor. Heragel ...Meilyr's wife.”

Meilyr. That man from his mother's past. That man whose face made Theo uncomfortable if he thought too hard on it. The man that since meeting them his mother had spiraled into a series of behaviors that led to this moment. This moment that found him staring at this woman who had cut down Orcs, run through the debris of a volcano, survived arrows and traveling leagues in treacherous weather to a land unknown to an uncertain reception, looking like a rag doll. She was crumbled into a shade of the woman that had raised him.

Theo stumbled closer. He lowered to Arondir's side at her knees. She released Arondir to clutch the hand that reached to her. The elf flinched slightly, though it was hard to feel rejected as Theo was always first in her heart. It was more the pain of not knowing how to give comfort. He simply took a half step back and waited.

A thousand things had run through Theo's head. The had been away. He had still been in the city. She had been alone. Meilyr wasn't a tall man, but he was muscled from his work. Theo supposed he could be imposing. His pulse raced.

“Did... Did he... Did he do...do something to you...when we were gone? Was she here to apologize? To accuse you of something?” Theo had seen enough and heard enough through the years from those around him and his mother herself about terrible things that happened to women in times of turmoil. He looked up at Arondir in terror. He had never seen such a scowl on the elf's face. “Oh stars! Mother are you--”

“WHAT?” Her voice sparked in shock that Theo had drawn such conclusions. “OH sweet boy no! No!” She pulled out of her reverie and reached out to take Theo's face in her hands before pulling him up to her. He let her keep him in her arms without protest.

Bronwyn looked up in horror and blindly reached out to Arondir to pull him into the hug. Theo felt the elf squeeze them both tight enough to constrict their breathing. He may be of few words but he did not hide his emotions as well as he might think.

“She..” Bronwyn cleared her throat as she pulled back. He hands smoothed down Theo's shirt as he straightened up to stand in front of her. Bronwyn took a deep breath. She steadied herself and reached out again to take both his hands. “She wants you to join them tonight for dinner.”

“Is it Menrin's birthday?” Theo scrunched his nose. The child still shadowed him from time to time. What other reason would there be for such a random request? Why would that of all things leave his mother like this?

“Theo.” She said softly. “You know that I grew up with Meilyr. I..we were...close. He... skies! Theo, I've seen you watching him. I know... you question...you have questions. You're so smart and--” Theo's heart nearly halted hearing how his mother dragged out words like they were sharp pebbles in her mouth. No. nononono. No.

“Mother...” His voice cracked in a way it hadn't since he had solidly entered adolescence. “Is... Is that...” Theo watched her face fall. Arondir placed a weary hand on her shoulder, squeezing gently. The touch made her cringe. She clamped her hands tighter around Theo's. Uncomfortable with the reaction Arondir withdrew the touch as if afraid to burn her.

“He... I. “She cleared her throat trying to focus back on her son. Theo could see her gathering her determination. “Meilyr is your f---no. No he doesn't get that.” He thought she might spit as if to ward off a curse. She resumed through a tight jaw. “He is the other half of your blood.”

The answer he had waited for so long hit him like a barrage of arrows. His knees felt weak. He had wanted to know for years. His mother was right, he had tried to ignore the question that pecked at him every time he saw the man's face that held so much familiarity in it. But this, this confirmation felt wrong some how. Theo stumbled back with the jolt. He fumbled with a freed hand for a stool that mirrored the one his mother sat on.

“I hope you'll accept her invitation.” The sudden, firm, statement drew his eyes back to his mother. She was beaten down but determined. That was the most she had seemed like someone he once knew in months. “Hear me out.”

“Theo it is only right that you have a chance to know him, to know yourself. Be things as it may, Meilyr was not an unkind man. Not for most of the time I knew him. I even had dreams that we might have a future once. I told you that he did not mistreat me he simply... found a purpose that consumed him. I wasn't a part of that. It changed him. But, watching him and his family, clearly he found his answers or found a way to put it behind him. He's not the person who left our home.”

Her words came into his ears, but they still chilled him. Seeing he was still listening, or hoping he was, Bronwyn continued. “Meilyr did not know you were to come into the world when he left. I listened for him. Talk of his father would come through Tirharad. I promised myself if Meilyr returned, I thought he would, I would offer him the chance to meet you. That day never came. Now it has.”

“I don't--” Rage, built up over the years with no real direction to go or name to be had, started to bubble back in him again. He hadn't felt something this searing since the day he assaulted their flooring and revealed the monster below.

“Theo. You have siblings.” Bronwyn cut him off. “No matter what has passed between Meilyr and I, that does not mean you should not know who they are. Though, it may be best if you not mention this to them, your relation, until things are settled.”

“Settled?” He quaked. She shook her head.

“You are nearly a man grown, dear one. So I ask this to you. I do not demand it. Dine with them, take your time to think about this and what you feel about tonight. Then if you wish to never speak to him, or if you wish to continue being with him—I cannot tell your heart and I will not command you to go against it.” She was starting to wither back to the person that they had come in to see.

This time when Arondir reached for her she leaned into him. Theo watched the long exhale of relief that left him as she drew upon his strength. A flickering of thought that this might pain the elf was something Theo didn't have enough of his own conscious mind to process yet. But it ached and fueled the anger that could not simply be wiped away by his mother's even tone.

“There are a few hours yet before you'd have to make a decision.” Bronwyn offered. Theo shook his head and stood. He had to move. If nothing else, he had to get out of this space. He had to run, to hit something, to do anything to get out this prickling before he lashed out at the wrong person.

“I'll go.” He said firmly. “I need to put an end to this.” Bronwyn nodded slowly. The weight of years of this secret suddenly rolled off her shoulders. The wave of regret replaced it to weigh her shoulders into a curve. Theo knelt back down again beside her. He need to say this, he needed it to be as true to her as a promise.

“Not for me. For you.” It was Bronwyn's turn for a shock. “Mother, you are miserable. If I have to do go to sort all of this out, if it will help you rest.... I can do this.” Theo wasn't sure if it was the right thing to say. The smile she gave him quakes a little as she leaned forward to kiss his forehead.

“Keep an open heart.” She whispered. He nodded and stood to depart. A glance and returned nod from the elf knew that they were both leaving Bronwyn in each other's care in different ways. He would do this. He would put an end to these demons that had been gnawing away at his mother since that day they had returned from scouting.

It wasn't until Theo was gone and the light had all but drained from the sky that Bronwyn snapped. She grabbed a mug from the table. She hurled it towards the hearth skittering coals back into the bay. As it smashed tears seeped from her eyes. Arondir's strong arms looped around her.

“Why?” She muttered into Arondir's chest, ashamed of the childish statement.

“He was a coward. He ran when he could not face what he'd done. He might not have known of the consequences of what he did, but he knew WHAT he did! There was no love in--” she stopped, covering her mouth like she had just cursed her son's very existence.

“Theo is loved. He is treasured. It is the manner in which he came to you that is tainted not the result.” Arondir whispered to her, reassuring her that he understood what she had meant.

“Yes he had other reasons for leaving but he had been keen on avoiding them before. His quest was nothing but his own way to run. For all that, for all that he was a coward, what has he lost? Nothing!”

“He has everything that was meant for him before. It as if he never stopped being the son of the town's most revered. That rich little boy. Meilyr has respect. He has resources. The people love him. His wife is devout. He already has three of his own. Heragel's carrying a fourth, you know. Four! That isn't enough. Oh no.” Arondir hadn't imagined he'd ever hear such spite from his beloved or that he would understand why he would endorse such a dark feeling. After a moment of chewing at her lip and worrying of how to continue the true wound was revealed.

“Meilyr wants to take him! He wants Theo to go live with him! Doesn't he have enough? Why should he have our boy as well?”

Arondir smoothed her hair. He let her rage, to openly cry, and tried to ignore the crack that was starting in his own heart. He had not been appeasing Bronwyn before invasion. Theo had become dear to his heart. He longed to spend the brief time they comparatively had on this earth to be with him, to let them and their life be the lasting light in his eternity.

He had his own disagreements with his father, but he would never deny how precious of a bond he revered it to be. Even if the thought of loosing that which he had been building with the boy was anguish, he could not protest. “He is the boy's father. It is as you said, he has a right to know--”

“No!” Bronwyn pulled back suddenly. The elf assumed she was about to fight the idea again. Instead she stared at him full of apologies and sorrow. “He is many things, and Theo has his blood truly. But I do not speak of Theo as his and my own. Meilyr has done nothing to earn that title or the respect that comes with it yet. He may one day, but I fail to think of how. Not when--” She stopped her mix of rage and attempt to clarify with a deep breath.

“Arondir... Meilyr is trying to steal our son. Yours. Not his. Not in any way that truly matters. At least that matters to me. He was not the one who stood by me and helped provide for us both. You've been shaping him into this wonderful man I see blooming in front of me.” She cupped his cheek with her hand. Sobs still hiccuped up.

“Meilyr has everything in his life that I once dreamed of. He took everything, nearly, from me. I would pay that price over and over again for Theo. My feelings now... I know how selfish they are... but I cannot stop myself from despising the fact that Meilyr gets to live out all the things I had dreamed about for us longer than I dared admit. I want others to see and value your worth as well as mine. Not just as a soldier, but as tender of the earth you long to be again, the provider, the caretaker. I want your dedication to be recognized by both our kinds. For... for our own family. For it to grow.” her voice dropped to a whisper as she felt herself reddening. “Meilyr took the best years I had to offer you. Why is it that he knew my youth when you must settle for the shade I will become?”

“Bronwyn.”Arondir lifted her hands to kiss her knuckles. “If things had not transpired as they did, you would not have come to Tirharad. Our paths would not have crossed. I would have walked eternally in a world that was dimmed for never having known your light.” Bronwyn stared at her feet. He leaned forward to kiss the tears from her cheeks.

“I see you as brilliant today as you were as that scared girl I first came upon. More so for all that we have survived. I have known you all these years he was foolish to be absent from. I got to know a remarkable woman and her son who is dominated by her spirit and likeness in his actions. While I wish you had not known the cruelties, I am shamed to say I am thankful as your pain has lead me to finding the both of you. You have given me more joy than I thought possible.”

“You speak as an if you are little more than air, but I see you. I see us. The three of us.” He could not address her other secret wish. “This is not an end. It is our dawn. Though of your time it may be one in autumn. How could Meilyr possibly own the best of you when you have not yet fully blossomed? You have so many years yet before you—at least by the measure of your kind. ”he knew the doubt that would have been at the head of her counter argument if he had not acknowledge the ever lingering fact.

“How could he be more blessed than you and I when he did not hear Theo's first song? When he not have the honor of first taking Theo into his arms? His children are precious. All life is. But Meilyr has lost out on the gift of seeing Theo growing to be the one his children now admire.”

Bronwyn's features softened. The tears could not stop. “I'm scared.” She quavered. “I don't know who I am without him. I can't lose him, Arondir. I can't.”

Firmly Arondir gripped the back of her neck. “Impossible. I have watched him all his days. There are many things after all these years that still confuse me of your people. All the same I do know that men love as purely as strongly as elves do. I see how devout Theo is to you. And if our son is as I know him, if I have passed anything to him in my small way—may it be to know what makes a home a home. For me...and I believe him...that is you.”

“Will you stay tonight?” Bronwyn sniffled, voice almost lost. “I know you still have duties, you only promised dinner but--'

He did not respond. Arondir stood. He shed his plate armor,cape, and boots. Returning he lifted her from her seat. Bronwyn nuzzled into his chest, wiping her wet face on his tunic innocently to rid herself of the remaining tears.

Silently he took her to her bed, unmade from her rush that morning, and set her onto the straw stuffed mattress. He crawled in with her, pulling the blankets around them. She rolled towards him, clinging with all her limbs as if he would fade from her as well if she did not hold with all she had. It was early yet for sleep, but Bronwyn had been in need of it days.

“Rest. I will wake you when he returns.” She curled like a child in his arms. In the scope of time she was. He couldn't bare to see her like this. Others might diminish like this but not she who had shown him unimaginable fire and strength. Still he could understand the terror of the theft of choice, of yourself, and the threat of loosing that which you loved more than all.

Arondir could not heal her heart. He could not give her promises. But he could hold her. He could rub circles on her arms and back, her head. He could whisper to her of dreams she might have in slumber and of those for the waking hour. He could spin tales of potential for their future on the other side of the war. He could speak of his own hopes, those he had previously dared not vocalize for fear of increasing her apprehensions. Arondir could reassure her that their hearts were one. He could swear that time nor age would diminish his devotion to their family. And so, he did.

Chapter Text

In spite of his daily training his legs are burning by the time he turns onto the crowded street to where the home that man lives in. He can't swallow the reality of the term he should be applying. Not yet. Theo's lungs are raging and his nostrils are stinging from the chill in the salty air. He had pushed himself, hard, trying to beat the cascade of emotions into the very ground with his feet. He wasn't an actor. If he didn't want to scream when he got there, he had to release some of this inside him first.

The light lingers this time of the year. The city is awash in prolonged sunsets and rises. It's reaching its last strains by the time he's in front of the cobbled walls that serve as the front of the three roomed building. The very sight makes Theo's insides twist with something that isn't quite jealousy. His mother and Arondir had arrived just before Heragel and Meilyr respectively but it had taken them this long just to get into the small space they had recently all moved into. As far as Theo knew, this had always been where the family lived since their reuniting.

Those from within the city valued Meilyr. He was on good terms with established businesses and traders. Even though his mother worked every moment to keep the sicknesses that frequently followed migration, cramped spaces, and scarce resources they so feared at bay she hadn't earned half of what Meilyr had in their eyes. Not to mention that Arondir was helping at the expanded academy to train sons of the wealthy for command positions how to actually survive if their front lines fall. They still looked at the three of them as a sign of the troubles at their doorstep.

Outside Menrin was showing off what he had learned at the academy that day for his younger sister Heradis. Menrin was so proud of being enrolled upon his last birthday. Though he would never be called to the front, given the nature of war, the military academy had accepted students as young as twelve for basic defense training and groomed them for aide and running positions. They started true military training at fifteen.

“THEO!” the alarm in the call of his name made Theo switch his focus from the younger boy—his brother the voice in the back of his mind reminded him-- forcing him to notice Meilyr. He stopped observing his children at play, running to Theo placing concerned hands on his shoulders. “What is it? Your mother! Is she alright?”

“Fine.” He heaved in a few breaths realizing how hard he had pressed himself. Theo took a few deep gulps of air. “Just... Heragel invited me...dinner.” He stabilized finally. “Figured I'd try to get my run in first. I challenged myself to beat the sunset.”

“See Papa! I told you, Theo's the BEST. He'll pass the next trials! He'll be the youngest ever.” None had ever passed the trials in either Numenorean or the defense force of Pelargir before they were seventeen. They could be taken at any time with unit commander's permission. On average it was closer to their twentieth year. Theo was still in his sixteenth year and had honestly not considered applying yet. He trusted Arondir and Elendil to know when he was ready.

“There's more to passing than being physically capable.” Theo walked over and ruffled the shorter boy's hair. He had yet to hit his growth spur or change in his voice. “Don't be in a rush to grow up. It's not so much fun as all that.” Menrin clearly did not like that answer from the scowl on his face.

“You sound like Papa. Being young isn't that great. You can't protect yourself. No one trusts you to do the important things.” He grumbled.

“It might not be the same kind of a fight, but what would happen if not for women like your mother and younger boys like you who would keep places like this safe while the men are trying to keep the others at bay? Who would be here to welcome us home, heal them, inspire and motivate them? When you're younger, you move quicker. You can hide in places you can't when you grow. We need people like you who are learning to protect yourself, to make our Generals and soldiers' jobs easier so that they don't get stuck doing all the smaller tasks.”

He didn't seem convinced.

“And not all people who pass end up on the front. There's a lot you have to do. There are people needed to try to design better defenses, weapons, to keep us safe. We need carpenters like your dad and masons. Without them we'd be defenseless. Who would rebuild our homes and repair what the enemy destroys? We need people who farm or we all starve. You can't fight well when you're hungry. We need people to keep our horses, blacksmiths to keep us armed and them comfortable and protected as well. We need people like my mother who are brave enough to go to the front to heal our wounded, and those strong enough of heart to stay behind for those who have to be brought back for treatment.”

Menrin still seemed unsettled. He looked over at his father who just shrugged. His expression said that he had said something very similar to him. This time it wasn't him who was lecturing. Menrin glared in all his preteen irritation.

“Theo! You made it! Just in time!” Heragel came out from the house, wiping her hands on a rag to usher her family in. She glowed with excitement seeing him. “Go wash up out back. It will be all on the table by the time you return.” She shooed the lot of them to the common area well. At least they were forced to this as well. They hadn't the more centralized, private, water sources that those within the wealthy areas of Pelargir had fashioned. There they washed and Theo replenished himself with a few long drinks.

The weather was shifting to the chill of fall, but the inside of the house was blissfully warm from the cooking hearth. It countered Theo's cool down keeping him just on this side of sweating that he had worked up to in his run. His eyes wandered around the room.

There was laundry and goods hanging. It was the chaotic yet organized mess that came with several people in a small place with over half being children. There was a work desk and bench next to the dinner table and cooking area in the center room. He imagined one room was for the adults. The third was an area for the children to sleep. Through a door he could see rolled up matting as well as a desk area with small discarded kegs for sitting that made up a schooling area he knew Heragel did with them. It was filled with smells of living rather than the floral and herbal haze his cottage in Tirharad had. All the same there was still the lived in atmosphere that Theo found he missed.

Heragel shuffled things around with one arm as she balanced little Dergar against her hip. She hefted him up. He was really too big for her to hold him so anymore. The strain was apparent.

“Here, let me!” He rushed forward to take the bowls she was handling from her and taking them over to the table. “Uh, you.. know what you what, I could, take him instead?”

“You're a guest! Certainly not.” She waved him off with thanks. The boy, close to toddling age was fussing now that he had seen Theo and was reaching out towards him clearly not comfortable though his mother made her best efforts. Heragel smiled in apology. He shook his head, hoisting away the youngest of the children—of his siblings-- and blew out his cheeks making other silly faces and sounds that still made him burst into laughter.

“Hey! How'd you do that! He NEVER laughs at me!” Menrin pouted.

“That's because you're the one always telling him no!” With her hands on her hips Theo could see the resemblance between Heradis and her mother even if she had the same coloring as him and her elder brother. Only the youngest seemed to be as fair.

“Hush you two. Come. If Theo can help so can you.” Their acknowledgment was in unison as both moved to help take the food to the table. Being the stronger of the two there was some pride as Menrin took the cloth from his mother and hefted the cast iron cooking cauldron onto the rack it would sit on at the table.

Meilyr was the last to join them. He pressed a kiss to Heragel's cheek before taking his place at one end of the table. Menrin brought in one of the kegs from the study area and scooted the chair he normally used over, ushering Theo into it so that 'the men' could sit together on that side. Thawed from the shy girl she had been when they met, at least privately, Heradis rolled her eyes. Her mother clearly stifled a smile and just gently moved the girl to the table.

The stew was thick, more gravy than broth. The meat was generous and the vegetables large and tender. He didn't know anyone able to afford to make something so hearty in this part of the city. He hesitated a little, wondering if they had put themselves out to impress him. Theo hadn't realized he was so hungry until he bit a slab of the fresh loaf his sister was happy to declare she made that morning herself dipped in it. The collective laughter made him aware of the grateful sounds that had escaped him.

“Mom's really good. You came on the best night. We always have something really good for the Thanking.” Theo blinked, searching his memory. He coughed, putting the back of his hand to his mouth .
“Oh! I uh, do you give a blessing first? Did I start too soon?” He had waited for Meilyr as he knew was custom in some families, to let a head of household do all things first. Had they foregone a custom for his comfort?

“That's right. There weren't many practitioners at home. It's Heragel's way. I forgot you wouldn't have known. The fault is mine.” Meilyr reassured him. “Thanks are given in the morning and at the end of the day for the blessings of the week. Not for the meal itself.”

“You don't do thanking?” This seemed to trouble his sister.

“Not... exactly. I mean we do but... well mum just always encouraged me to think about the things we had rather than what we didn't. She'd say that the way we did things, the way we used things, was important. It's treating things with care that care for us. Arondir's the one who introduced talking and thanking our garden. Over game he submits respect when we've had a successful hunt. So in a way, we give gratitude as we go. And not to a single source.” Many cultures had gathered in a city like Pelargir and Theo wasn't familiar with all. But he had known from some in the Southlands that there was a sect of people who paid tribute, curses, or asked for blessings from an ambiguous form that he was never quite sure was meant to be a being, a manifestation of the earth, or a creator like he had learned about from Arondir and the collective the elves called the Valar.

“That's beautiful!” Heradis sighed. It was her brother's turn to roll his eyes.

“You know for someone who never liked elves---OW!” Despite the blank look of oblivion Theo got the distinct impression that Menrin's toes had just been stomped on beneath the table.

“Papa, you knew Theo's mother when you were little.” Heradis said sweetly ignoring her brother's incoming blame. “Did you know Arondir as well? Is it strange that he hasn't changed?”

“Hordern was under the watch of a different tower. Unless one of our traders to Tirharad had heard a pressing rumor our paths did not cross with his unit. Though hearing stories from the elders of those we would see being present throughout their lives always did add to the feeling of them being unlike us. Maybe even fear, or jealousy. I dare say since we were so close to another tower we didn't see elven kind often. My grandfather used to speak of their presence though.”

Theo chewed slowly. It was still rare for those of the Southlands who had not met Arondir or a few of the survivors from other towers to speak of them as anything other than oppressors. He couldn't blame them. The resentment ran deep on both sides. He still felt lingering shame for his own thoughts now and again.

“What was Bronwyn like?” Menrin prompted with a mouth full.

Theo watched from the corner of his eyes as Meilyr thought about the question. The teenager wondered if he imagined the look of slight nervousness as Meilyr looked over the table to his wife. She smiled a little, nodding. He wondered how much Meilyr had talked about his past with her. Did Heradis ever know of his mother as a general person? Did she know why he left? Was she part of the reason?

“I don't remember many years where she wasn't a part of the family. She was my mother's apprentice, did she tell you that?” He asked Theo who nodded in affirmation. “She just showed up one day in my mother's garden after her school lessons-- barely old enough to spell her name asking about the different flowers and things, about what mother used them for. Every day after that she'd run all the way from our schooling house the moment the instructor dismissed us. Mother started keeping an old apron out for her.”

“She was dedicated, purposeful, determined.” He was lost in his memories. “She always had this way of wanting to be a protector, to set things right. Oh but she could be fiery!”

“There was this one time-- she had been working with my mother for about two years. One of our neighbor's hogs came romping into our vegetable garden. We traded for a lot. Mother was busy as a healer. My father was the only carpenter in the village, constantly at work. There wasn't a lot of time for farming but we had a small patch for ourselves. Everyone did.”

“I was coming back from fishing with a friend and I see this little waif of a girl, not even as tall as Heradis, swatting at these swine. Our neighbor sundered over. Midday and already half way through his cups Bronwyn stood toe to toe with him, wagging her finger at him. This man was twice her height and almost five times her weight and there she was demanding that he do something about what his pigs had done. He simply laughed her off. Do you think that would stop her?” Meilyr started laughing at his memory.

“Well the next afternoon she was a little later than usual. Not a half hour gone, there's a knock at the front door. The same neighbor's there, slumped over. His mother, this woman long gray, stooped, was swatting at him with a broom. I swear if she were able she would have been dragging him by the ear, telling him to say what he came to say. Well this man started mumbling apologies like a child of five—his mother asking him exactly who was going to make the tonic for his father's cough or the salve for her old aching legs if my mother had to spend all her time tending a new food garden instead of her remedies? Well he tried to say that we were rich enough to get food ourselves. That broom handle thwapped his head before the words were even out of his mouth!” The children were giggling with their father now. Even Theo was smiling picturing a miniature version of his mother standing by, smiling proudly as a wrong in the world was righted.

“Next we know that man comes over with his son, all this lumber, and we have a new fence within the week. When they're done his mother returned , asked Bronwyn if she had said it was peach pie my mother loved, and promptly handed her the pastry that was going to be her son's birthday pie! I'd never seen a man so heartsick at a loss of food in my life—and I've seen starving men!” By the end of the tale the food was mostly gone and the room was full of chuckles.

“What I won't forget, though, is that after all that it was Bronwyn who insisted he stay for desert.” Amusement had left Mielyr's face as he looked thoughtfully at Theo. “Your mother couldn't stand to see someone in pain. She was a healer, a teacher, she didn't want the man punished. She just wanted things set right. I've seen a lot of that in you, in the way you treat Menrin and Heradis. And how Menrin tells me of the way you are with your fellow cadets.”

It was difficult to keep eye contact. Theo felt like he was trying to see something in him, traces of himself underneath. The warmth of the compliment turned to stone in his stomach. Instead he gave his compliments to Heragel and the meal and moved to help her clean up. She tried to deny him but he was instant. He had to get away from the scrutiny for the moment.

The calm of the familiar actions doesn't last long. Heradis had to excuse herself when the babe started throwing a tired tantrum. Though before she left Heragel to put him down she gave him a quick hug whispering thank you into his ear. Meilyr interrupted them, ordering Menrin to help his sister and asking Theo if he would take a walk with him.

“There's something I'd like you to see at the docks.” Theo's jaw tightened. He wished that Menrin's plea to come along was be granted. He was sympathetic when the boy was denied.

“You promised to continue your traditional schooling if we let you enroll. I believe you still have today's lessons to do before bed.” He father drew an aggravated sigh out of his son.

Theo nudged him playfully as he would friends of his own age and softens the blow. “You won't have a chance at becoming an officer without knowing sums back and forth, or to be able to read a map or compose a proper report.” The reminder gave the younger boy determination.

“I think sometimes you know what to say to them more than I.” Meilyr mused. He offered Theo an extra sweater from the pegs near the door as he slipped his own on.

“You're his father. You've shown him the things he needs to know. I can tell him the things he wants to hear. No, not that, I guess it's just... I see what you're trying to say to him, but if he can see how something might help his dream—well dreams change, but the lesson's still there. I mean, I never want to hand a pestle ever again—but knowing different motions and pressures has helped a lot with sword work. And if someone like mother isn't around, it's comforting to know I might know a little to help others out until we find a healer. So I guess I just get it.”

The way Meilyr looked at him, with that wonder and curiosity made his skin crawl again. Meilyr grinned down at him with pride that doesn't feel earned. Without further word Theo took the sweater and let the older man lead the way outdoors.

The outskirts of the growing town are both quieter and more lively. The soundscape has shifted with the early evening. People had taken their goods and carts home. Laborers weren't rushing around for supplies. There wasn't hammering. Most animals, save for the occasional clucking or breath of a tied horse, had been settled in. Mothers swept at doorways, taking off the dust that was blown around by the scuffling of bodies through the day. The taverns started lighting their lanterns and chatter of early dinner goers before the music and drunken sing alongs started. It was the calm before the brief release of the day's stress before it fades into slumber.

“Your...” Meilyr's cough brought Theo back to attention. “I'm very happy to see you. I...Heragel told me she went to your mother but I... didn't expect you to come. I'm not honestly sure if I would had the situation been reversed... at least...she.. she did tell you why she asked?” Theo almost had a wisp of pity seeing how nervous he was.

“She told me how she knew you. Who...you are. To me.” Theo confirmed, shoving his hands into pockets that were still a little too deep for him.

“Right.” The air that Meilyr heaved in and out of his lungs was heavy. He couldn't bring himself to speak again until they were halfway to the port.

“I meant what I said—your mother is a remarkable person, Theo. She has raised a wonderful young man, from what I understand, entirely on her own.”

“Arondir helped.” Theo found himself snapping. “He was always there. I just... I didn't know it. Mother wasn't always sure herself. He always watched out for us. He'd hint to traders of things he knew we could need or could use her services to head to the village instead of turning to Hordern or another town. He'd leave things at our door. He was there when I was born.”

“Was he?” That stopped Meilyr's pace. “I thought their...partnership...was far more recent.”

“It is. I guess I was a bit of trouble even then. He happened to be passing. He saved us both and...well, I guess he never stopped. Even though it was dangerous for him.” Theo found himself awash in gratitude not for the first time.

“I am beholden to him for many things, then.” Meilyr stopped to squeeze Theo's shoulder before looking at his own feet. “Theo... no words can change the past, but before we go further—I need you to know that I owe you and your mother the deepest of apologies. If I had known I never would have--”

“She knows.” He stopped him. “She...I didn't know anything about you. She never talked about you until after we had left home. That was one of the first things she said to me. She believed you were an honorable man in your own way.” He wasn't sure if the words would be a comfort or sting.

“It is...more than that. We can only be held accountable for so much when we are young and headstrong. I had turned into a person who was dismissive and ungrateful for your mother. She deserved so much better than the person I became. If I had been half the man I thought I was, I would have listened to her. I would have been respectful. I wouldn't have left. I hope she'll give me the chance to tell her that.”

It's not what Theo had expected. Not that he supposed he knew what he was waiting for. Somehow this wasn't it. Excuses, maybe? Bribes? He found himself nodding in acknowledgment and proceeding in the direction he started.

“You...You can ask me.” Meilyr offered. “Now, or later. Anything. I owe you that much. I would like to know you, Theo, on your terms. I'd like you to know me, if you so wish it.” Somehow the invitation made his heart sink further. The smell of the water hit them hard as they came in sight of it close to the old town and the docks where skeletons of ships lay near the docks placed up on braced to keep them from dragging in various states of construction and repair.

“We're nearly there.” Meilyr assured him turning onto the cobbled streets between the old settlement. This was the richer part of area, where those established and with means resided and did business. He immediately felt his posture rid itself of any arching. His instincts told him that those would judge him for the threat they imposed on all foreigners these days.

“This is where I've been working.” They stopped in front of a new building. The stones of its foundation were not yet smoothed by the ocean's salt. It was magnificent, he had to admit. The rafters were detailed with forms and symbols true to their Numenorean heritage. It would be some commanding officer's city office and barracks for the city guard. It was an example of what he had told Menrin of earlier, those working to support the city.

“Did... did your mother tell you the reason I wished to talk to you? Other than the truth?” Theo shook his head.

“Son.” Theo flinched at the word.

“Theo.” Meilyr amended. “I could teach you. I would like to teach you, to give you this, a trade to lean back on. I don't mean to dissuade you as I have tried with your brother. I know where your heart lies and your skill. I also pray for days where none of you have to be a part of this conflict. In those times you will need to earn your way. You are good with your hands. You have a great eye and ability to direct others. You could easily switch from directing troops to other workers.”

“I know you didn't take to your mother's arts, but I do think you could thrive at this. After the war. But if you'd be willing as Menrin does after his own training to come apprentice me in your afternoons, it would be less to catch up with others of your age. I imagine you and your mother had to do many of your own basic repairs so you might be further along than I suppose already.”

“You...want me to come work with you?” Disappointment and confusion stirred in Theo. Maybe he had thought this would all be apologies and stories.

“Yes. At least, ask that you give it a chance. Maybe seeing you would spark some interest in my son. Salt and Stars know he's shown none so far. You've become a hero to him in ways I've never been able. It would be a joy to teach the both of you. And Dergar when he is old enough.”

Theo turned back to the house. He had promised his mother he'd take whatever was asked of him into serious consideration. It was fine work, though he couldn't say he knew much to properly judge. He had never considered such a trade. It had never been an option. It wasn't terrible to think of times of peace even if they seemed impossible.

“It...would be easier for you if you didn't have to keep running from the training grounds, here, and home. As you see, I'm very close. Soon, my family will be moving into the city.” Theo looked side wise at him. Wasn't their current home luxury enough in comparison to what little others had?“What I'm trying to say Theo is that I'd like you to come stay with Heradis and I after our move. Live with us, you'd be able to go back and forth and not spend half the time getting from one place to another.”

“You want me to leave mother and Arondir.” Theo's jaw set solidly. “What you want me to just come meld in with your prefect little family? Tell them, gee, thanks for doing all the hard work but I'm going to go with this man and his big house and important jobs even though he never once wanted to check on his own family. Your father died never knowing where you went off to, you know that? Mother told me she heard it from the traders. She cried for days after she heard an old friend of her family passed and a friend was missing. I didn't know until after she told me about you...”

“I... there is not a day I do not think of what I put him through.” Theo's snap had struck the man that fathered him to the quick. “He lost his wife, and then I was gone. Vanished . On some folly. It is a regret I can never vanquish. You are not wrong to hold me to count for that. I was ashamed that I could give him no good reason for my journey. I could not bare to return knowing I could not give him the proof of something that might make all his sacrifices worth it. But...that is not a tale for now—though I would tell it to you if given the chance.”

Theo stood, arms crossed. He would not be moved. Anger unlike that he had felt since the days before he had found that cursed blade pumped through his veins.

“I am not asking you to abandon them. I owe them everything for making the man you are today. You'd be free to see them as you would, on our day of rest. You are nearly a man grown, Theo. I simply wish to try to make up for some of hat of which I have missed. I failed to provide for your mother and you all these years. I'm trying to help you build your own future. Please.” he held up his hand in order to buy more time.

“You do not need to answer me right now. I simply want to offer you this chance. I only ask that you consider it.” He was pleading with his words, his tone, and his entire posture. Meilyr suddenly seemed half his physical size. Theo bit into his lip.

“Living with you, that is the price? You wouldn't want me unless I stayed with you too? What, because you need more help at home? Is that what being so good with Menrin and Heradis was about?”

“No!” Meilyr waved his hands, lowering his voice and pulling Theo to the side of the path when their outburst started to collect curious stares from those wandering through the early evening. “I just … no. I won't lie to you Theo. I have lost so much time. It's not just about me. You have three siblings, Theo. Four soon.” There was a small crack of a smile at that admission though it hit Theo like a whip. “You've lost time with them too.”

“Your mother always wanted a large family. I was shocked, I admit, to see she hadn't remarried and had a brood of her own. Surely you must have wondered what it would be like to be a brother? You are. I don't want you to miss out on that because of me. I want them to know their brother.”

Try as he might Theo could not transfer his anger to his siblings. Meilyr had struck a chord. Theo had always wondered what it would be like to have playmates, to be a leader to others of his kin. He had supposed any lonely child would. Theo had been so found of them when they had been leading them to Pelargir. That hadn't faded. He enjoyed their enthusiasm and admiration. The smallest part of him did want to be around them more. But that also meant witnessing daily everything his mother and him had been denied throughout his youth.

“I want you to live with us for the sake of your own health. You are far too busy to rest enough and despite your maturity you are still growing, lad. Your tasks are demanding and I am blessed to have more resources than some. The army's had to keep provisions tight what with the constant influx of people and the uncertain harvests. Run off has been wrecking havoc on outlying crops on top of the usual unpredictable nature of weather.”

“ Your mother and Arondir could not be more commendable, harder workers, but they have been denied some of my luck. We'd be able to keep you better fed. Warmer. Perhaps they might even be willing to join us each thanking for dinner. You could stay with them the night before and they could accompany you back if their schedules allowed. Before she knew that Heragel was my wife your mother and her had got on well. They had been friendly. Would such a connection be terrible for either of them? Bronwyn sees so much illness and strife in her work day in and out. Would having little children in her life not cause your mother warmth?”

The memory of his mother's face lighting up whenever she'd speak of a new babe she helped deliver or a child recovering from a fever came to his mind. So did the deep dark weary half moons that had settled under her eyes. All three of them weren't good at resting. But largely it seemed as if his mother's entire spirit had been zapped.

“And if I didn't want to live with you, we wouldn't be welcomed at your table? Would you not wish to show me your own skills and work?” He had to know where this man's motivations truly lay. Theo had learned the hard way that words and actions were rarely aligned.

“Theo...”Meilyr's shoulders sagged. “I will take any of the time you will give me. Be it a visit or as an apprentice or anything in between. I simply want to know you, to do what little I can to make right the mistakes I have made.”

“So I'm your absolution.” His fists clenched in defense again. Meilyr reached forward to grasp his shoulders, shaking his head.

“You are my son. My blood.” For the first time that night his voice as firm. “I will not run from that truth, from this shame, as I did with what I did to my father. You do not owe nor do I deserve forgiveness. All the same I must take responsibility. It is another blessing that in this would also be the pleasure of knowing someone who has thrived in spite of my mistakes. I only ask for the chance.”

Nostrils flailing, Theo wrapped his arms tighter around himself. He scuffed at a rock between the paving stones. His eyes wandered to the house, he shadows of the streets that lead into the finer area of town, and to the man who was steadfast in his waiting for a response. He sighed.

“It's late. Thank you for dinner... but I need to get home. Mother will worry.” He spoke through clenched teeth unable to completely relax or look at the man directly.

“Theo?” Meilyr looked like he had taken a chip out of him.

“I'll think about it. That's... That's the best I can give you.” He croaked. “I promised mother that much.”

“Thank you.” Meilyr's voice broke. The wind howled between them as if nature itself was trying to sweep away the grit from the grind of their clash.

“I...would you like me to walk you home?” He offered. Theo shook his head.

“I... need my own words in my head.” Theo's mind was swimming with so many thoughts and reactions that he barely registered Meilyr's attempt to nonchalantly bid him goodnight and suggestion that he come mid week again. Theo did not commit to anything. He simply nodded and turned back on heel promising to pass on Meilyr's apologies.

He stumbled home in a daze. The voices within were loud enough to make him dizzy. He was unable to distinguish those of the people enjoying the night and himself. Several times he barely avoided running into others. Even a cart or two.

When he saw the familiar lantern light, swinging in front of the shed that had become his home, he felt his eyes stinging. Suddenly a dozen memories of childhood wounds being kissed better by his mother and soothed with ointments brushed on and created with her own hands flooded him. He thought of her stews, thin but always warm. He couldn't remember a single winter morning he woke to a cold room. She always seemed to rise first.

What had he given to repay her for these things? He had rejected her teachings. He rarely spoke up when villagers called her little more than a witch, spoke her name with the same caution and disgust as they did the elves if Arondir had wandered too close to her in public. He had launched himself into these ways of war. What could he possibly give her in return in the days where she could no longer work as she did now? What sort of life could he truly carve for himself or ensure for her? What if Arondir didn't survive the battles ahead? What if he didn't? What would she be left with? Meilyr was offering him a way out, another way to be, a way that was stable. If he didn't make officer in a decent time or if the war did not go well or they were unable to compensate those who served, here would be a way to make sure his mother wouldn't have to go hungry again.

The lump clogged in his throat. He wanted to weep like the small child in those memories. Angrily he wiped his eyes with the back of his sleeve, took a deep breath and headed in. His mother lay on her palate dozing in Arondir's arms. The elf looked up. He nodded in hello and leaned down to kiss his mother's forehead. So tired was she that the gesture didn't even make her stir. Theo's heart ached anew. Bronwyn had been working herself ragged to give them a place, a refuge, to come home to. To keep others whole and safe.

Shaking the loaned sweater off his shoulders and kicking off his boots he did something he hadn't in years. He went over to his mother's other side and curled up along her. He buried his head against her shoulder. Instinctively she turned and tucked his head under her chin. Her arms wrapped around him in her sleep.

Theo felt Arondir's large hand press to his back reassuringly as he pushed himself up. The elf tucked the blankets in around the two members of his family. Theo's cheeks burned in shame at the thought of the elf seeing him like this, so weak. He felt those same lips that had pressed themselves to his mother come to his own cheek. Theo's tears began to flow openly. How many years of his youth had he wondered what it would be like to have a father do that? How long had Arondir wished were able to commit this simple, domestic, loving act? How much time had been lost between all of them? How could he trade it away now that it was in their reach?

How could he betray all of that? How could he not take this chance—for their sake, to thank them? Theo sealed his eyes shut. He would not allowing himself to sob as he ached to. He prayed sleep might come to him as deeply as it had his mother. He knew it would be many nights before he'd rest well again.

Chapter Text

His ascent from sleep was slow. There was weight. It was an all encompassing warmth enveloping him. It encouraged him to stay back under in the comfort just a little longer. There was a slight scraping. Faint echoing clinks. an air pocket popped, busting in the hearth, slowly registered in the space between dream and alertness. The food upon it wafted scents that set his stomach rumbling even after it had been so filled the day before.

There was something else. Earthy, wet, dank. It pulled him back into memories of hiding among roots and decayed leaves after fleeing Tirharad. And...dead...fish? Why was he wet now?

“OH! Oh BRINE AND BARNACLE!” Theo swatted as his face was awash with a large tongue flapping across his cheek. His attempt to squirm away from the affectionate onslaught only encouraged the shaggy creature to flop with a heavy thunk onto the space the teenager vacated. The wolfhound that used to have a place in Waldemar's tavern had found its way to Pelargir months after them. He had attached himself to the family, or rather Arondir, instantly. “NANU. OFF!”

He received only a 'harrumph' of defiance and a nudge towards him begging the boy to scratch that place on his neck he just couldn't quite reach. A sound close to a chuckle drew Theo's attention to the table by the window where his mother sat out a plate as she watched the exchange from the corner of her eye. He motioned at her helplessly. She only bit her lip. As put out as he was he wished she'd just all out laugh. He missed that sound.

“Arondir isn't here, mutt!” Theo said helplessly as he tried to get out of the other side of the mattress. It gave the dog the chance to smell all over for his favorite member of the trio.

“You just had to let him in, didn't you?” He grumbled as he made his way over to the wash basin. Theo wasn't surprised to see that she had already gone to the well and filled it. He stripped off, throwing his shirt at the dog in protest. Nanu was nonplussed in the least.

“If he scratched any more he was like to make shreds of the door. You're one to talk. Just how fast can you resist giving him a scrap when he directs that whimper at you?” She countered.

Theo finished cleaning in silence and traded out his common clothes for his training uniform. He yelled that he'd clean his spares himself when he came home. It was pointless. He knew he'd come back to see that she had managed to get that done as well. Theo was fairly certain at this point his mother had the ability to invent time that no one else felt. He wished she'd stop. He wasn't half as tired as her even when his commanders pushed them to the brink.

From a quick glance he could see she had already packed her satchel. He knew his offer to help with breakfast would be rebutted. He couldn't even roll up the sleeping mat because of the hound. Instead he retrieved his discarded clothes, tossed them into another basket, and folded up the blanket and pillow not claimed by the canine.

“Stop fussing now. You've not much time and I'll not have my boy fainting from hunger if he gets sent out ranging today.” Bronwyn interrupted his search for something else to do to help. Theo glared as she poured in a heap of porridge into the singular bowl.

“And yours?” He kept standing in protest. She waved him off fetching a few slabs of bacon.

“I'll stop by Fereath's on the way.” She was short on the matter. Fereath the baker had the most heavenly buns and breads Theo had ever tasted. She also was the rare sort who had been born from a lesser family in Pelargir and yet had opened her shop to the refugees. She had even taken two on as apprentices. Her own children choose different professions. She slowly aging and the influx of new citizens made it hard to keep up with demand.

Bronwyn insisted on paying what she could of the small amount of money she collected. She was firm that they all had to help one another when they could. Fereath might be willing to accept items and trade for her services but those of the city that she had to get supplies from would not. Theo didn't begrudge the expense. He doubted his mother would actually truly stop if he did. Stress and a lack of preservation had noticeably diminished her form form these days. He crossed his arms and intensified his glare.

Heaving a dramatic sigh of defeat Bronwyn collected another bowl. Only when she sat with her own portion did he acquiesce and sit himself. He compromised by not forcing her to partake in some of the pricey meat that she had portioned into his bowl.

He ate slowly. The silence between them settled the weight of the previous day onto his shoulders. His blank stare and stop of action did not go unnoticed.

“Did you know? What he wanted?” He watched his mother's spoon slump in her bowl.

“I did.” Her hand became a fist. Bronwyn clenched her emotions into it. “I... I didn't feel it was my place to...” She couldn't meet his face until he reached out and placed his hand over her own.

Slowly her grasp released. She turned her hand over releasing her fingers and pressed her palm to his own before shifting and running her thumb over his fingers. “You've gotten so big...these are not a child's hands anymore. Where did my little boy go so swiftly?”

“He's here.” Theo's voice cracked in a way it had not since puberty had set in. He squeezed her fingers into his, lacing them.

“Mother I...I don't know...” His words were cut off as she raised her hand to his lips.

“Even though my heart screams...even though I would have you stay by my side all your days were it up to me, I cannot deny that it is a generous offer. More than my wish to keep you is that you might be safe. None of us will be until this war is settled. If that day comes, there will be a great need for those of the trade he offers you. It would be a way to provide for you and any future family you may form of your own.” She slid her head to press her forehead where her mouth had been a moment ago to collect herself. With a squeeze she connected their eyes.

“I cannot tell you what path to take, sweet one. No matter what my own heart says, what you do decide on, it will not change that you are mine. I could never love you less. Ever. There will be a place at my hearth for you all my days.”

Theo withdrew his hand after one more squeeze. He shoveled a bite into his mouth as he thought. Clandestinely he watched her shift her own meal around. Only when she noticed him peeking did she take another mouthful.

“I've never even thought of being a carpenter.” He mused.

“You never had anyone to model it for you. It is active work. Detailed. You've a sharp mind, Theo. It would suit both of your strengths. You'd enjoy it far more than you did my own trade, certainly. You never complained but I was not blind enough to see that you had no heart for healing. I was not disappointed. Not deeply.” She amended.

“I'd like you to find something that gave you joy that did not be such a risk—though I suppose no mother hopes their child need be prepared for danger.”

“They're having another baby.” He whispered. For some reason that knowledge had burned him deeply. His mother's nod confirmed that she had known this as well eased the burden of having to say it. Yet the reality wedged in deeper. The reason it hurt other than what he had missed out on already was suddenly crystalline.

“If... if I went with them...you'd, well. You could have more too. If you had more to eat you'd be stronger. You'd have more time alone with Arondir. You'd...You'd have a chance to like...do.. all the things you never got to in Tirharad. Like court and stuff. If I wasn't here you... Maybe you...” His burst of rushed words slowed down to a trickle.”You could have your own family. With him. Like you should have had. Like you deserve.”

“THEO!” The anger in Bronwyn's voice shook him almost as much as the violent screech caused by the push of her chair away from the table. The noise made the dog in the corner shoot to attention. Nanu's eyes snapped to from it's doze to alertness, focused on the humans, looking for a threat. Seeing and smelling nothing he laid his head back on his paws but still kept on the two. Bronwyn came over and kneaded in front of her son.

“You listen to me. I did not lack anything because of you. With everything going on I just... I tend to lose track of things. I swear to you I will try to do better.” He looked doubtful. “ I never want to hear you speak like that again. YOU are what I was meant to have. You are more than what I deserve.”

“Theo, sweetling.” She stood, reaching down to cup his cheek and draw his attention to her. “He is not often one for words... but you are so precious to Arondir. He has loved you from the moment he drew you into this world from me. I saw it that night and every day since. We have been denied nothing simply because there is not common blood between you two.”

“The only regret I have ever had was that I was not strong enough to face all of them. Elves. Humans. I should have insisted he see you as much as he yearned to. I should have let them just say what to them was their insults, let them believe what they did. I am sorry your mother's weakness took from you what you deserved. I never dared hope that affection might grow between us, but I desperately wanted to nurture the love I saw him hold for you.”

“But you—you two--”

“No buts.” She reprimanded him. “You can't change what has already happened. You can only shape your future. I am content with my blessings. Now finish. You've a long day ahead of you. And, I fear, longer days. Though if that man has given you some deadline to make such decisions--” Theo shook his head no. Resolutely she nodded in approval before retaking her seat and shoving a determined bite from her bowl into her mouth.

Before Theo left towards the training grounds, a piece of the bacon had in fact flopped onto the snout of the snoozing beast. He didn't noticed if the dog had even fully awakened long even as appreciative jaws to pried open mid snore. Miraculously the treat was gnawed and gulped regardless.

~*~*~*~*~

“Wooooah... Yikes, Theo! Ease up.” Dilgran shook out his hand as Theo pushed him back and away after his practice sword collided with incredible force. “Are you channeling Emund today?”

Theo glanced over at the fellow cadet named. The heavily tanned and freckled boy had barely broken a sweat. Unlike Theo he didn't cease his attacks on the student he had been paired with. He was doing his best. There was a sheen of perspiration coating his skin as he struggled just to keep his sword up at this point. Theo's distraction allowed his sparring partner to get in a cheap shot. It was barely a tap to gain attention.

“Sorry.” He muttered as he returned to starting position. “Lot on my mind.”

“I ...can....tell..” Dilgran huffed as he matched Theo's blows. “Don't go too easy on me. Commander Tarazir will give you extra laps.”

“You sure?” Their words were exchanged when they were close. Chatting was not encouraged. Dilgran nodded.

Dilgran had upper body strength. He was the son of a notable blacksmith. He could handle the physical aspects of training. His apprenticeship at home exposed to extreme temperatures. It helped him tolerate high activity in the middle of summer. Most of their year were used to coastal weather and started to flag in energy by midday as they sun was coming up faster and staying longer.

The Southlands were dry. It was a different sort of heat, not so muggy. Theo still suspected he would fair slightly better. He had the advantage to his friend in winter. There was no so much snow away from the height of the mountains in Theo's old home, but nights could be absolutely bitter even when days were warm. Dilgran, being near a forge, was almost always cold from fall to spring.

The two had met a few days before they both had started training. Dilgran had been helping his father with a delivery to the fortress Theo had come to bring Arondir something he had forgotten when he left for a meeting with the other chiefs in command. They had instantly clicked. Theo saw the same yearning in the boy who was a touch older than himself. A month into training they were nearly inseparable. Unlike Rowan, Theo didn't feel like he had to prove himself to Dilgran. It was a strange revelation to put into words.

The onset of war increased need for military recruitment. It was a twisted blessing that so many had migrated to Pelargir regardless of what the upper class prattled about. It also meant that the academy had to shift their training method. Normally those that applied would be admitted to a rank of which they demonstrated an ability. If your family was one of wealth and you had access to private tutors... Well, it didn't take a genius to figure out who would be promoted. To handle the influx, the academy had decided to handle all applicants as they came as stage one.

Many who had been preparing for this their whole lives felt cheated at the set back. Theo could understand that. He also saw the advantage of having some more advanced students mixed in with beginners. There were only so many trainers. Plus part of building a strong unit was forming strong bonds with those you came into the ranks with. Those that helped their fellows would become good leaders.

Thanks to Arondir's teaching on their journey and the scouting he did with him, Theo knew he personally would have passed into at least a second year on admission. He didn't mind the setback. He might if had another year or two of preparation behind him.

Dilgran didn't have great combat skills beyond knowing what a well balanced sword felt like. Still his physical conditioning might have been enough to warrant him a position up. Dilgran may have been a laborer's child, but that laborer was well respected. Beyond that Dilgran had the sharpest mind and thirst for strategy Theo had ever seen. If the commanders were smart, they'd focus on honing that skill and not just assume his bulk would carry him to glory.

Then there were people like Emund. His father was of rank in the military. As had his grandfather. Now the elder was now retired from active duty and on the city council. He was one of those very vocally displeased with the outcasts at the edges of the city.

Emund had wanted to follow in his forefather's steps since he was little. He wasn't shy of letting his stance be known. He was down right aggressive about it. No side assurance from the ranked officers that promotions did still happen when you reached third of the four required years of training and apprenticeship. There was no chance with his connections that he'd have to serve additional time before being approved to take his trials.

“Yield! I Yield!” The cry could be heard above the various clunks of boys and a smattering of girls training with dulled steel. That was another issue of ill content. Thank the stars that their training master hadn't yet paired Emund with one of the female cadets. The very thought of crossing blades with a girl would probably send Emund's head into the clouds.

They had just moved up from the wooden weighted equivalents which was another common gripe anyone close enough frequently heard. What was the point of not learning the dangers of a blade? No matter that the army had limited resources to equip even serving soldiers. With dull blades, great injury that was sometimes worse than a clean cut could be received. Theo doubted Emund was concerned with the dangers of infection over appearances.

Emund's opponent was on his knees. His limbs quivered as he did everything he could to to block the older boy's continued beating. Rage boiled up just as Theo had started to swallow it down. He charged across the training yard and blocked Emund's next thrust himself.

“He yielded! We all heard! Let it rest!” Theo spat. Emund was red in the face from rage rather than effort. His glare was as sharp as a blade.

“You think the enemy will yield? This is ridiculous!” He huffed. “The least they can do if they're saddling me with all of these clueless buzzards is give me someone like you. Even the blacksmith's boy knows how to grip a hilt. How can you stand it? This is a waste of our time!”

“A soldier follows command.” Theo shot over his shoulder as he turned to offer his hand to the fallen trainee.

“It's Rodthen, right?” The boy nodded furiously. Theo twisted around to face Emund . He was still standing at the ready. “Rodthen might not have had someone to teach him how to wield a sword—but he's one of the best riders in our units. I bet he could keep up with you in a race. He didn't even grow up on the back of purebreds. You sparred with Elocar the other day, right?”

“He lasted all of a minute. I suppose at least this one kept up for a few turns.” The hot headed recruit huffed.

“My mother tells me that Elocar's is one of the best healers she's worked with in the infirmary. Unlike me, he actually liked what she did. You think you won't need someone like him around to patch you up when none of my mother's people are able to make it to the front lines? You can look down at your unit all you want—but unless you think you can take down an entire wave of our enemy—suck it up.”

“What do YOU know about real battle?” Emund snorted. “They can't help if they're all dead! You don't know what it's like out there.”

“ While your mothers were telling you fairy stories, my father was preparing me.” He belted out, sure to draw attention to himself. “You think the enemy's going to go easy on them? You're a bigger fool than I thought you were. You have so much to learn. “

“ I do have a lot to learn.” Theo held his arms out. He welcomed the blows of the verbal attack. “It helps if you listen to what's being taught. You want to be a leader? Start acting like one. Your name's only going to get you so far.”

“Isn't that precious coming from you. You might know basics. I'll give you that. Talk to me in three years. You might be where I am now then. Or do you honestly think you get praised for your talent? They wouldn't look at you if you didn't know Captain Elendil and Lieutenant Arondir.”

“I work for my assignments!” Theo hissed.

“Yeah? Prove it. Show me I'm wrong.” Emund growled. He raised his blade and pointed it in challenge. Instinctively Theo mirrored the position.

“Theo!” It was the warning in Dilgren's hiss that made Theo look over his shoulder. Training Master Tarazir had stopped instructing a pair across the court. He was starting to pay attention to the others. Theo relaxed his shoulders and stood up.

“I don't need to prove it.” He tossed his sword down. He walked closer to his would be foe. He hoped that Emund wouldn't be boiled blooded enough to strike at someone unarmed.

“Predictable.” Emund stepped into Theo's space. “I wouldn't have to either if my mother was sharing a bed with the Queen's favorite Lieutenant. Grandfather sees her at headquarters an awful lot. Who knows. Maybe she's paying favors to Captain Elendil as well. Maybe the tents of healing are really a code for the brothels of you country filth. That the type of 'healing' she specializes in?”

Theo snapped. In a flash he grabbed Emund's tunic, yanked back his arm and smashed the older boy's face with in enough force to unbalance him. It wasn't for long. Emund barreled into Theo with a roar. The two were sent into a rolling mess in the dirt. Fists, feet, and knees flew in marked blows as they sparred with equal fervor. Theo's head rang as one jab collided into his temple. Theo's knee struck at the other boy's loins. Theo gritted his teeth through the pain. He rolled and gained advantage on top of the other boy.

Theo was vaguely aware of his voice screaming for the other to yield. He demanded Emund to retract his words. In the frenzy he struggled against Dilgren's attempt to draw him away from Emund by the back of his shirt. His instructor's screaming of their names didn't register. It wasn't until the grizzled older man had them both by the arms, that they stopped flailing. Both stood inhaling breath.

“WHAT IN THE SEAS IS GOING ON HERE?” Tarazir roared. “This is not a brawling ground! You're here to be SOLDIERS not THUGS! Emund! You, of all people!” The boys flinched even as they continued their glowering.

“You're not even with your assigned partners!” The commander hissed. He shoved them in opposite directions.

“Sir,” Rodthen stepped up with a shake in his voice. “Theo came to my aide when Emund didn't hear my yield. I...I must have been out of breath too much for him to hear over everyone else.”

“You thought the only way to get his attention was to start a fisticuffs?” Tarazir demanded of Theo.

Theo kept his jaw tight. He weighed his options. Rodthen had done his best not to place blame on either. Emund had been out of line with his sparing partner. But Theo knew he shouldn't have fallen for such a childish teasing. He dug his teeth into his lip.

“Si-Sir, “ Dilgran spoke up. “Emund continued and issued an official challenge. He would not let the matter rest when Theo turned him down.”

“Sir,” Theo kept his voice stead. He turned in attention to his commanding officer. In his heart he thanked his friend for trying to defend him. “I acted out of order. I should have retreated instead of engaging. Regardless of circumstances. I accept the consequences.”

“Hmmfh.” His teacher scowled in examination. He crossed his arms as he surveyed the trainees. “Emund? What have you to say to this?”

“Sir. After completing assignment, I sought to continue my training in the time we had allotted. I resorted to regrettably undignified tactics as a matter of self defense. I engaged in that which I thought would do least damage to my fellow recruit.”

“Yet two of these recruits speak against your actions.” Tarazir lifted his chin, not afraid to look down on the well-off trainee.

“Sir, I don't seek to accuse. But Dilgran well known to be a compatriot of Theo. Rodthen sought to clarify Theo's misconception of the situation.”

“Whatever the circumstances, the both of you can forget the rest of today's training. Theo, I expected more of you. Emund, you have had training above this level. You should have been aware of your sparing partner's faltering. You can both think about your mistakes while you finish the day mucking out the stables. You will not report in tomorrow.”

“Sir! The scouting?” Emund did not talk back directly. There was a strain in his questioning.

“You will no longer be considered for a mission that requires more concentration than you are clearly capable of, cadet.” Tarazir dealt a verdict worse than the beatings they had endured. “For your insistence in acting like pub rats you two can put some of that energy into working with the quarry men.”

“SIR!” Both boys went wide eyed. The chipping and lugging of large stones used for building and fortification was body breaking work that only the desperate and those born to it took on. It was known for being a short lived career either by the plethora of accidents or the deterioration to strength. It was the most severe punishment that could be assigned.

“If you two believe yourselves to be so highly valued you should have no problem facing a consequence that a student less capable would not face.” The message was clear. Ego was the true crime.

“Yes, sir.” Theo breathed. He sank into himself. Emund's echoed response was through gritted teeth.

“Dilgran. Rodthen. You are to your comrades speak for themselves. I will not have a unit turn on one another and fracture with preferential treatment. AM I CLEAR?” He yelled out across the yard just in case there was as student not witnessing this trial. “You two. Five laps. The rest of you-- Back to starting stance!”

The commander cocked his head at the boys. “You two are dismissed. I expect to see my stallion and his stall spotless at the end of rotation. You can take over for the commanders' apprentices today as well so they can focus on their mentor's stalls. Quarry call is daybreak. Unless you want to spend your hours hauling under the noon sun.”

“SIR.” Both saluted. Theo clutched his fists. No ranging. Goodbye to the goal that had been getting him through the grueling exercise drills this past month. How was he ever going to face his mother covered in hay and dung? He felt the humiliation curdle in his stomach.

Well, at least he'd have time to think. Maybe throwing around some rocks would give him something to do with all this frustration in him. Theo doubted it would be as satisfying as that first blow that had created the bruise already blooming on Emund's cheek. Theo bit the inside of his own to keep the smirk from his face. Things were already going to be hard enough without a broken rib that he might find himself with if Emund caught it.

It was going to be a very long day. Or days. He groaned realizing that Tarazir hadn't set a definite sentence for their outside work. Worse. How could he keep Arondir from knowing? The thought of his silent shame in him made Theo dig his nails deep into the flesh of his palms.

How could he look at the disappointment in their eyes? Maybe he was just as impulsive and selfish as Meilyr had been. Maybe he really was his son—well, of course he was. What if Theo had taken on all the traits that drove Meilyr away from his mother? How could Theo deserve everything his mother had given for him, all the faith Arondir had placed in him, if that were so? Theo wasn't sure which of these hurricane of thoughts made him more ill.

Enough. He scolded himself. He fixed his eyes on the direction he was sent. Muck now, muddle later. He'd figure something out. He always did, didn't he?

Chapter Text

There were no windows in the ever cool room where Bronwyn had established a work space. It had been structured in times more turbulent than ever seen before or since- until now. The section of the fort given to the healers was kept in the inner ring. Should there ever be a breach there was space to defend those seeking treatment.

The wing was a total of five spaces. The largest hall could hold a hundred or better pallets spread out with space. More could fit if they left space only between heads and feet of each patient. For the sake of the infirm's sprits, it was the only room to have light filtering in during the day.

The second largest was for teaching. Its walls were lined with shelves and cabinets holding previously harvested remedy components. One for equipment. The tables accompanied with long benches hosted various sets of common preparation equipment. Each initiate cleansed and replaced what they used after their session.

The third space was storage. It was a fraction of the size of the hall holding only the items with special storage requirements and most difficult to prepare on demand. Basic supplies could be tossed in spaces anywhere in the keep. Then fourth was home to the for accredited healers and advanced students who worked to create stock side by side.

Bronwyn could never have dreamed of such organization. Choosing to be a healer wasn't exactly a broadly respected job in villages. Stubbornness and old traditions made people weary of any innovation from grandmothers' remedies. Her mentor, Meilyr's mother, had done her best to dissuade her from the path. She had cautioned that though necessary, it frequently didn't garnish thanks or enough coin to support yourself. Bronwyn would have none of it. It was her calling.

The space where Bronwyn now worked was the last. The chamber was not her own. She shared it with the three eldest of the city's healers. The four convened here to do the personal tasks and to exchange progress reports and concerns. There were always two on a shift at a time with overlapping shifts to keep each other informed.

It had been a long time since the keep had been used to its full capacity. With evil stirring many outer villages started migrating to the more established colonies. There was an increased need for warriors, workmen, and healers. Possibly for the first time since its completion the dormitories were filling with trainees from all corners of the map and social sphere.

Despite the still air and the constant hint of smoke from the lighting, Bronwyn found solace in this place. She worked steadily with her mortar. Beside here were pots and flasks. Some held measured quantities of ingredients. Others were unused portions set aside to be rejoined to the cache. There were two vases of water. One for her own partaking, one for her work. A small fire was kept in the corner for the purpose of preparation rather than to ward off the ever present chill.

Bronwyn let her mind wander as she preformed repetitive, muscle memory, tasks. She had been meaning to revisit the conversation about her taking fourth shift. As the youngest she should be the one cast to wander the night. The others countered that her age specifically was why she should have a shift morning to late afternoon. She had her own life to nurture. The second youngest had one child still at home with no potential for more to follow. The eldest had grandchildren. The last had pledged herself as a youth to the deity of her clan in exchange for his guidance in her craft and had built no family of her own.

Bronwyn was intrigued by this woman with skin duskier than hers or Meilyr's, who carried an accent she had not heard in the Southlands or beyond in these areas where people from around the continent flocked. She was almost disappointed that their paths didn't frequently overlap. She had withheld asking Arondir if he had ever met or known of any she might be kin to.

There were so many things she wished to share with him. And Theo. Always Theo. There was never enough time. She had wanted her son to be willful and seek his own life. It was the destiny of every mother to be abandoned so their children can thrive. It burned her that she hadn't spent more time trying to help him find his path. Now that there was Arondir whose talents aligned to Theo's passion... there was another element threatening to rip him away before his time again.

“Um, my Lady?” The sudden voice jumped Bronwyn. Her elbow came up. She nearly knocked over one of the water vases over her pots. She had slept better than she had in quite some time. It hadn't been enough to entirely restore her. She cursed at herself and straightened the wobbling vessel before turning to the speaker.

“I didn't mean to startle you!” The young woman dashed forward to check the integrity of the restock essentials. The firelight gave the young woman's pale skin a glow similar to the red-gold of her hair. She kept her hair in a tight braid with a few curls inevitably popping out here and there.

“This is hardly your fault.” Bronwyn gave the young woman a soft smile. “Please, Vaelah. I'm no lady. My name is enough.”

“I thought you'd like 'mistress' as the other elders are to be called less...” Vaelah confessed, fighting the loosing battle of containing some of the stray locks out of habit. Bronwyn chuckled and nodded in agreement.

Vaelah was one of the most promising apprentices she had under her charge. It was increasingly difficult not to show her favoritism. If she was honest with herself, it would have been so even if Vaelah wasn't as sharp.

The had met on the journey to Pelargir under less than pleasant circumstances. With a storm on the horizon they had been ambushed separated the group into two. Arondir had gone ahead based on rumors of threats. The raiders had been successful in dragging away part of the caravan. She and the young woman were two of those. Vaelah's parents, once notable merchants in their small town, had remained with the group. Her father and Theo took command until Arondir rejoined them and set off with a small group to track the missing persons.

At the bandit's camp there were a smattering of other abductees. Some showed signs of finery. Either they had been taken from one of the more established places on the route to Pelargir or they were carrying all of their belongings on them as they fled. It was hard to tell what the group's ultimate intentions were. It was slow and loud to move so many. It wasn't likely they intended to keep them. Though the use of certain women was made plain quickly.

Bronwyn had shielded the teenager. She mused her up further with dirt in grime. She gave harsh instruction to stay as silent as possible. There was a fine line. If they thought her infirm they could assume she'd give less of a struggle. But there were those drawn to the defiant as well. Even under the muck Vaelah was undeniably beautiful. It didn't take long for them to notice and even less time for Bronwyn to try to intercept. She told them lies about Vaelah being used before and carrying something that would make their precious parts wither off. Other captives came to her defense when the raiders scoffed at the healer.

One of the captives told the brutes Bronwyn had spent the few hours the new arrivals had been there offering what she could to fix up broken and sprained limbs. She raised her own cleaned wound as evidence. It was a distraction. The thieves put Bronwyn to work fixing what gashes had been inflicted on them in their mission. When at last they remembered their hunger and considered the pickings among the new captives, Bronwyn and another barely older than Vaelah offered themselves to their whims. There were others damaged in body and mind who would not recover the experience for certain. Bronwyn would never forget the girl's face that turned to stone as one dragged her off. It was a face that was used to shutting down to preserve itself.

Bronwyn put up enough confidence to keep the man had targeted thirsty for the challenge of her. She tried to silent reassure Vaelah who had started weeping. Vaelah tried to clasp onto her champion when the victor tugged at his prize. Another woman pried off the child's fingers and covered her hand to muffle her screams.

Bronwyn had closed her eyes. She whispered with her soul, begging if she survived this Arondir might forgive and be able to one day see past her being so sullied. Fortified she opened them just as she was tugged into free fall. Her captor was splayed on he ground, writhing. An arrow logged itself to the back of the knee. Not even the instinctual part of her pressed her to help the agonized man. From the ground she screamed out direction, pointing in the direction where the other volunteer had been spirited away to.

From the shadows came more arrows. They were followed by familiar faces charging into camp. In minutes those that had taken them were felled. There was little guilt over claiming the valuables that they had stolen from others. It would be distributed evenly to help each migrant make their way.

On the journey to rejoin the others Bronwyn had kept Vaelah close. There was an uneasy silence between those that trudged back to the main group.Vaelah who eventually broken the tension, asking Bronwyn about the things she growth she had collected around the camp. In the few hours it took to reunite with her parents the girl was able to identify a dozen plants and the combination for a pain relieving tea. By the time the group reached Pelargir, Vaelah was well on her way to already knowing what they'd expect any first year to master.

“Forgive me for interrupting, la—um, Bronwyn.” Vaelah's quirk of her nose showed her discomfort of using the given name instead of an honorific in spite of their shared history. “ Commander Tarazir asked me if you and the elders had compiled the list of necessities for the scouting exercise? And a list of healing apprentices. Idealy four, three if they must. They'd like to move the timeline. Storms are projected in a couple days.”

“Of course. I will pass my recommendations to the others. Check again in the morning. I'm sure we'll have a consensus. The second years will be doing up essential satchels this afternoon. We just need to know if they want basic or battle.”

“B...battle?” Vaelah's eyes widened a little in surprise. “I...I thought it was about observation and resource scavenging.”

“On the record, yes.” Part of her wanted to comfort the girl. The terrible truth was that this was the reality Vaelah was coming of age in. “There have been disturbing reports closer to our cleared territories. Even if not, the chosen need to learn to prepare for the unexpected.”

“Well, if that's the case, surely Theo will be selected.” Vaelah absently picked up the containers of excess ingredients that had almost been ruined and returned the remainders to their storage vessels. It was of nerves. Bronwyn had made prompting or stated she wouldn't begin another batch. A tickle pricked at Bronwyn. She suspected the movement was an attempt for Vaelah to conceal the flush that often crept up into her cheeks when Theo was mentioned. “If they need someone proven in such times, that is. He's well tuned to such abrupt calls to arms.”

“I wish it weren't so. Still I believe it will help him be the leader he wants to be.” the momentary levity was drowned again by reality. She eyed the girl, a suspicion creeping in as she sealed the earthware.

“The trainees have known this was coming for a while. But they've not been given a time table. You wouldn't happen to have any idea why Theo's so convinced it's coming so soon, would you?”

“I—I couldn't say.” Vaelah could not meet her mentor's eyes. “It's as you say. He could simply suspect based on what other units are doing or weather or---”

“Uh, excuse me, mistress Brownyn I—Oh! Oh Vaelah! Did I interrupt a lesson?” From around the corner came a sun darkened face with bright blue eyes.

“Dilgran! Come in. Vaelah just came with a request.” Bronwyn beckoned him, straightening her posture.

“Did something happen to Theo in training?” Vaelah blurted before Bronwyn could ask. The abrupt burst drew both their attention. They did their best not to aggravate her embarrassment.

“He's fine. He's doing some extra duties. You know him.” Dilgran shrugged his broad shoulders. “He asked me to come down and tell you he'd be staying in the student barracks tonight. He wants to hit early training.”

“Why is he so set on this! It's not like he hasn't already done more than what they'll be asked to do. And not just in these mock things. He survived when it mattered!” Vaelah huffed, placing her hands on her hips. It was a gesture far too old for her and a direct copy of her mother. Bronwyn didn't point out that she had been recommending him moments ago. She also knew from the confidences bestowed on her by the young woman that Vaelah was still plagued by the day they met. She was easy to fluster when it came to the actuality of conflict.

“I think he's trying to do everything he can to either put Emund in his place. Or to get promoted so they can get away from one another.” Dilgran repeated his shrug and chuckled nervously. His attention shifted. Squinting through the dark he eyed some wall charts.

“Would you care to take a closer look? You may. This is an open place of learning.” She stood, moving to usher her son's friend with a gentle hand.

“This is old.” He strained to see through smokey, quavering, light. The ink had faded to a whisper on aged parchment. “These aren't flourishes or elvish. This... this is the river, right?”

“What Theo says is right. You can recognize a map from chicken scratch.” Vaelah joined him.

“The first healers of Pelargir made it to locate regional flora.” Bronwyn confirmed. “Today it is a reminder of the legacy of this place.”

“It's wrong. The landscape's been changed. We build on it. Things have been torn things down. This forest is only half that size now. At least, from newer maps I've seen.” dilgran kept his finger off of the material tracing in air over the parts he spoke of.

“Sadly, yes. We're desperately in need of a new one. It's missions like one you speak of that will be vital to rebuild it. Unfortunately there have been more distracting and important matters than to waste resources in venturing too far. What we do have is a mess of collected reports.”

“Mistress?” Dilgran shuffled. Vaelah gave him a soft correction for her. “Bronwyn. I haven't had cartography yet... it's usually left to the scholars but.. do you think maybe, would it be trouble, if I could see what you have some time? I think it would be kind of fun to put one together.” His enthusiasm waned to embarrassment. It was the type of thing that brought him endless mockery from cadets and his father alike.

“You already have many commitments.” Bronwyn tilted her head ever so slightly. “I've seen my son. There are days when he can barely wait to put his head on the pillow. A task like that is tedious. A burden.”

“It wouldn't be a burden at all!” Dilgran jumped at the invitation. “It... things like that settle my thoughts. It's a lot easier than trying to anticipate all the battle movements of an opponent that's for sure.”

“In that case, I'd be happy to get you a copy of what we have. Don't rush. It's not your responsibility. Focus on your own training first, promise?” He was eager to agree.

The two teenagers gradually made their exit. Vaelah lingered a little longer, asking if Bronwyn required assistance to catch up with her interrupted tasks. Left alone with her work, Bronwyn felt the echoes of emptiness in the room.

She was proud of her son's dedication. Seeing him thrive in spite of the unrest was a blessing. Staying in the dormitories would certainly grant him more rest, she told herself. There was the prospect of potentially having a night alone with Arondir—something nearly unheard of since her boy returned to them. That spark of that thought fizzled.

The three of them did their best to see each other each day. They were too aware of the lack of promises in life. Activity on the mountainous borders and increasing unrest in Numenor were putting more pressure oh the slow moving preparations. Arondir spent more and more time helping train young archers or in the war room with Elendil and the Queen's council.

Isildur was due to return sometime this afternoon. No doubt there would be much to be discussed. Arondir was apt to choose to take a meal with the commander's son. The two had formed a bond when the elf was sent to search for the human when his survival was rumored. It would be good for Arondir to renew that bond. Familiarity in war could save lives.

Bronwyn would likely be spending the evening alone. So be it. There was always something to be done to occupy her restless mind. It was the thought of this being the start of many more solitary nights that was weary.

If Theo accepted Meilyr's offer he would not just be spending a night at the fort. She'd rarely be the one to be there when he rose or returned. True, he was nearly grown. It had all gone so fast. The thought of it to be over in an instant? She couldn't bare it.

“Enough of this sentimentality!” She slapped her own cheeks. There was no good in projecting. Focus on the things you could do. With a clearer mind Bronwyn did just that, setting back to the poultice she had begun.
 

*~~*~~*~~*

Arondir was thankful that his race's durability spared him the haggard expressions that had looked back at him from the strategy chamber. Isildur was the most well rested and he had rode nonstop from a place upriver on the Anduin they were scouting as potential defensive position the day before. He hadn't left his father's company in the early evening.

Elendil then took into counsel the scouts who had arrived a few hours after his son. They had been cautioned not to push their own horses hard or travel in from closer locations unless urgency was involved. Those meetings had kept the Captain up late into the night. This morning he had been up at dawn to hear from the fleet arriving to the coast. They and various administrators had moved to reviewing supplies, the weak spots in their eastern defenses, and airing frustrations. They spoke in whispered tones. Too many students and staff scuttled through the hallways.

The fortress was meant to protect from external attacks. It was not made with the acoustics to keep secrets. These were days were spies could be expected. With words slipping on the wind through cracks, there was urgency to have a more private meeting place. The military commanders were anxious for the secondary headquarters to be completed. Not only for discretion, but as a place of record keeping and a station for a city guard to reassure the older residents and defend the inner city if the need be.

With no ending to informants to meet in sight, Elendil asked Arondir to take Isildur to inquire about the progress on the new meeting place. Isildur had only seen the drafts. He had left when the old space was demolished. It would be a lesson in infrastructure for him. Arondir suspected it was his way of giving his son a brief respite. Arondir was also asked to evaluate it for potential elven sensibilities as it was intended to accommodate all allies.

The elf had only been slightly surprised to see the hound that had followed the three of them from the Soutlhlands laying in the shade of the outer walls. The moment the dog scented him, he stretched out his long limbs and trotted over. Instantly sensing the elf's energy and nuzzled into his thigh for his version of a hug. He tolerated the good nature pat Isildur gave him, the young man amused by the furry shadow they gained.

Normally Arondir would be revived by the sun and signs of summer peak. His weariness was not that of men. It did not show on his features. It was not cured with sleep. Though resting with Bronwyn curled into him the previous evening after his late arrival had given him some respite. Arondir's waking hours were consumed by all the short comings in their readiness. There was the division between those of his kind on their role in the conflicts. There was always the scrutiny of his choosing to live among humans and being a refugee. Into the bargain was all that was stirring with Theo—a fact made even more solid as there was no sign that he was home after training. It was only Bronwyn being at ease to tell that he was accounted for.

“All right then,” A soft tap at the back of his knees caused him to turn his head ever so slightly towards Isildur. Valandil had mentioned his old friend once had youthful enthusiasm in abundance. It still appeared from time to time. “You are brooding more than usual. Things are no more dire than usual on the fronts. What's happened? ”

“...It is of no concern.” Arondir waived off the question.

“Bronwyn kick you out of bed for coming home late?” Isildur let out a full bodied laugh when the suggestion broke Arondir's normal stoic expression giving way to unsettled bewilderment.

“There are...other matters of the home.” Arondir was careful not to be specific. They had not discussed how much they were willing to share with others. They would have to measure how much information would be good for Theo and ask what his own comfort of disclosure of his personal revelations was.

“I thought you and Theo were getting on?” Isildur was clearly running through options trying to pry answers.

Luckily Arondir didn't have time to respond. They'd arrived. The roof was being added. Isildur let out a whistle of appreciation. He also was quick to quip about how many ships could have been repaired for the same cost or weapons crafted. Isildur had not seen eye to eye with the Queen's advisors on this account. Arondir was mostly of Isildur's mind. He also saw the building project as a peace treaty between those who had been settled in Pelargir and the refugees. That was a difficult asset to quantify.

“Ah! Master Arondir!” A graying man of broad shoulders and arms stopped from dispersing directions to join them. Arondir had given up on trying to get the laborers and common folk to drop honorifics. “Just in time. The lead of our builders is due to leave for his other project. He's wanted to talk to someone about some ideas for internal reinforcement.”

“Oi! Meilyr!” The man, Farthon, boomed. Arondir tensed. From the inner courtyard a man covered in saw dust, preoccupied by the plans in his hands, came out towards the voice.

When his head came up Meilyr froze in place. His eyes circulated around the three persons. It was brief but noticeable even to Isildur. If not that, the warning growl the tension prompted would have done it. Isildur straightened up slightly, ready to defend his friend. Arondir silenced the dog with a a stroke of his ear. Isildur moved from combative to aware.

Farthon made his introductions and lead into the issues. Meilyr haltingly began to explain how he wanted to reinforce certain areas with masonry. It was a measure to protect vital spaces and their contents from potential fires. Ideally a military base would have been entirely stone exterior like the fortress. Time in resources, like all else, were the determining factor.

“We've already hitting close to budget with the outer fence. There's a limit to what the quarry can produce for the sizes you're speaking of.” Isildur jumped in, preening a little as he showed off that he could, in fact, pay attention to his father's unending deliberations.

“Ah yes, about that.” This was why Farthon remained. “There are some ways we can use some of the rubble for that. Or to fill in spaces at the higher levels of the parameter. It would save some coin for the inner project.”

“The high labor cost is a little more troubling than the financial.” Meilyr was honest in business. Arondir burned the other man's features into his mind. The carpenter couldn't quite meet his gaze.

Arondir had previously been casually familiar with Meilyr. They had consulted in the early days. He had seen the similarities and thought it coincidence. Men were so many that it was common for features to be similar. Bronwyn's uneasiness hadn't concerned the elf, feeling it was just that she had seen the same. Before the das prior Meilyr was just another acquaintance Arondir associated with Heragel's visits.

Arondir fought the senses screaming threat. If not for his attentiveness, he may not have caught Meilyr's eyes fixing at a point over his shoulder. Arondir attended to the distraction. Other heads followed.

“Theo?” Isildur was the one to speak the boy's name.

Among he masons were those laborers delivering from the quarry. Theo strained to lift and wedge rocks off of the crates onto carts to take them where they were needed. He was out of uniform and had shed his shirt as the others had when the sun started to climb towards noon.

How? Why? Had Arondir misread Bronwyn's ease? Did she not stir long because she had heard of this and held him responsible for not interfering?

“Is that how you train your soldiers!” Meilyr's words to the officers bit.

“Aahhh! Is that your boy then? Should have seen it! Spittin' image, he is. I thought he had a few years before he could join up!” Farthon scratched the straggle of his beard “From the stories you tell of your feistier days after a mug or two, can't say I'm surprised he got himself in a spot of trouble.”

“Quarry duty is...only given to the most serious offenses... never on...site...Usually kept to clearing and the bar unloading.” Isildur's words were slow. He blinked rapidly as he shot glances between Meilyr and Theo trying to process what he was seeing. It quickly changed to eyeing his friend and the carpenter.

“Aye, true.” The mason said, “I'll have a word to the quarry master about it. Didn't realize he was there on dispatch. I'll tell you one thing, Meilyr. He's got your work ethic. If I had five more of him this whole project would be done by now. He might not have the arms on him yet, but he's got brains. 'E came up with a way to wrap ropes I might have to look into. Could help take some pressure off the workers. You've got quite a boy.” He clamped a hand hard between Meilyr's shoulder blades at what he felt was a compliment.

“Uh, sir...” Isildur cleared his throat...”Do you think you might show me those plans you had for the inner reinforcements? I've had a hard time putting it together in my head. Seeing it might help.”

Happy to oblige and gloat a little about his work, Farthon beaconed for Isildur to follow. Meilyr started to charge over to Theo. Arondir caught his shoulder. He called out to the mason asking if workers were permitted breaks. The sound of Arondir's voice drew all color from Theo's face. He gradually tilted his chin to see not one but both of them.

“There will be no break, this will end now.” Meilyr hissed. Arondir held a light grip on Nanu's scruff to keep the dog from reacting to Meilyr's getting close. “You endorse this? This is how you've cared for him?”

“I had no warning.” Arondir said calmly even though his rage blazed. “Do you want him to be given two days for breaking form?”

The elf had insisted on not interfering with Theo's official training. That wouldn't keep him from having words with those in charge of his training. He, or at least Bronwyn, still should have been told of a serious misconduct.

“Ah yes...BOYS!” Farthon squinted at the sun. “Water time.”

There was a collective sigh. The nature work was what broke their bodies down young. It wasn't cruelty of overseers. Capable bodies were hard to find in good times let alone now when those of lesser means were running to join the military.

Theo went to the buckets filled from the well with the other workers. Maybe he thought to evade them longer. Maybe he thought they would avoid him. He was certainly wrong. Restraining Meilyr was as simple as holding a hurricane.

“Who did this!” It was an explosion as much as a question. The regular workers all flinched, looking to one another for guilt. They were surprised when Theo put the ladle down and shuffled towards them with a lowered head.

Arondir caught the exchange of a look between Theo and another boy a little older than him. Emund, the son of one of the commanders. The blonde boy was monitoring them after the outburst. Arondir suspected their offenses were linked.

“I...I acted without dignity and against the code.” Theo spat out as he came close enough to be heard at a low tone. His voice was dry from the dust he had inhaled through the day despite the sip he just took. Arondir took the flask from his own side to hand to him. He accepted it quietly after hesitation. Nanu's tail thumped as he stepped forward to smash his nuzzle into Theo's hands, lappin at the broken knuckles.

“Do you send your boys to this type of work for not lacing their boots right?” Meilyr hissed. “What could possibly lead to this?” Meilyr had lowered his voice. His arm rigidly pointed to the rag tag group Theo had been working with.

“I...I....” Theo had learned to be proud of himself and stand with confidence. He was shrunken. “It was for....for brawling. Ignoring protocol. It's only for a day. Shift's nearly over.”

“You were provoked.” Arondir's words made Theo flinch.

“No excuse.” Theo mustered the courage to look up. “Responding dishonorably is a sign of weakness. Reacting is considered that there is truth in the filth said. I...I acted within the code towards the rest of the exchange.”

“You're children!” Meilyr threw his hands up before reaching for Theo's arm. “I've seen half those uniforms in a pub. Why are they reprimanded for the things they do for simply bumping into someone? This is ridiculous. Come. I'll speak with Farthon later. You're coming with me.”

“NO.” Theo ripped his shoulder away. It shocked the carpenter. "I won't be like them. I will pay for my actions. I will finish this. I don't run away from what I've done.”

Theo's words struck Meilyr in the heart. He stumbled half a step as Theo scowled at him. Now the adult was the one who was avoiding Theo's gaze. Meilyr's own demons and regrets flashed in front of him.

“Theo.” Arondir spoke low, soothing. Theo looked at him confidently. He exhaled frustration through his nose before returning attention to the man he shared blood with.

“I know you don't understand. I know you're trying to help. Right now? This is the path I'm following. I have to do it my way.” Anger and frustration built up behind the words spoken behind a clamped jaw.

“You... You choose this then?” Meilyr's words sounded broken. Gone was the commanding.

Theo searched Arondir's face for guidence. The elf nodded at him. They had spoken before about decisions made in anger and in grief. The small gesture encouraged Theo to take another deep breath. Relief washed over Meilyr's features when Theo shook his head no. Sorrow balled in Arondir.

“For now. I—I need more time, Meilyr.” The use of his given name did not bode well for the carpenter. Theo excused himself as the overseer called them all back to work. He returned Arondir's flask to him, hesitating.

“Mother?” Theo croaked. Arondir didn't need to focus his hearing to hear the rush of Theo's pulse to know his question and fear.

“It is not my place.” Theo didn't seem relieved as he retreated. It reinvigorated Meilyr's rage

“I know you elves can get to thinking you know more of how things work because you live so long.” He stepped up into Arondir's space. His posture decreased the height difference. “But what right do you have to keep this from Bronwyn? She is his MOTHER.”

“It is Theo's responsibility.” Arondir barely blinked. “He deserves the chance to speak to her himself first.”

Meilyr's jaw was set. He settled back down on the heels of his boots. He scrubbed his face as he tried to reign in the anger. The carpenter huffed in frustration.

“You're right.” Arondir could tell it was difficult for him to admit. “Who am I to tell a boy not to take responsibility? It's the temper of mine. Of all things why'd I have to pass that to him?”

“You are a man who cares for his blood. He was in difficulty.” Arondir's fingers twitched at his side. Finally he chose to reach out to the other man. He clasped his arm to draw the man's attention. Meilyr looked up and seemed to truly study the elf for the first time.

“If you care so much about him, if he his so fond of you, how can you accept for this? How can you just stand there? Do you really think him straining every part of himself like a common convict was worth a stupid fight?” Meilyr was trying to find common ground.

“I must respect another officer's order. I'm not content. I have questions on this myself. There is more to this. Anger will not solve what has been done.” Arondir released Meilyr. “I do not believe Theo would rebel without great reason. Sometimes nurturing how someone responds instead of what has been done provides the greater lesson.”

Arondir turned his attention to the construction when Meilyr looked away from him. It tugged at him. He wanted to be as gracious as Bronwyn. He did not want to dwell in ill feelings towards the man he may have to share Theo's life with.

“Your work is masterful, Meilyr. My own kind could not do better with these materials to this style.” He returned his focus to the form that could be Theo's image in the future.

“I suspect Theo gained his sharp awareness of detail and quick gain of strength from you. I think I must disagree with Farthon and give Bronwyn partial credit for his work ethic.” Air puffed through Meilyr's nose nose as he noncommittally nodded.

“Tell me, Arondir.” Meilyr drew up his attention from the dirt at his feet. “You say you won't interfere. If Theo chooses my way of life instead of yours, will you respect that?”

The question had been one that had been like stones in Arondir's stomach. He suspected it is what Meilyr had wanted to know from the start. How could Arondir watch Bronwyn's light be dimmed by that implication? He never expected for Theo to consider him his father though he had long taken him to heart as his son. That Theo may choose to live the majority of his days with Meilyr and his half siblings felt like failing the boy and his mother alike. The elf had to choose his words and feelings carefully.

“I will watch over Theo for all of his days and those of any of his line. Afar if I must. I cannot let my own pain deny that your means of work would take him out of the immediate path of danger. If that is his choice I will be glad for his safety. I will be committed to him regardless.” The words caught in Arondir's throat.

“Even I did not hold affection, I'd still take this task. He and his are all that will remain of her when our paths diverge.” Even in this Arondir could not bring himself to face the inevitable fate for Bronwyn and himself. “The sundering from her may be my end. But I will not fade until he is long gone. Her light will not extinguish so easily.”

“Why?” Meilyr breathed. Arondir blinked in confusion. “If how your feelings for each other bring all of you so much agony—why do you stay? Arondir. I would watch after them. I swear they will not want if any man is able to make that be so.”

“Why put yourselves through this even longer? I cannot thank you enough for being there until now. I'm here now. Why not stop this endless worry? You could leave her to find a place for her heart that doesn't carry that shadow? Theo is nearly grown. You have seen him as safe to that. Bronwyn might find relief to know you won't carry the pain of her passing beyond years we can't dream of. She is a healer. Have you every considered how distressing it is for her to be aware of what you will go through?”

“Many times.” The instant response bordered on snapping. Arondir twisted so that he could focus on Theo as he worked. “It is too late. Our spirits are not tethered.  All the same I sense every moment that I am not complete. The only brief respite to that hunger is the taste of what I may share with her without tying our souls.”

Theo disappeared behind what had already been built of the wall. He paused to recollect his thoughts. It was too easy to sink in the depths of silent thought. After so many years of keeping his own council it was a hard habit to break.

“To taste what could be for us, though bitter, is far sweeter than not having known either of them for as long as they are.” A haunted smile tugged at the corner of his mouth as he flashed through memories of caring for them from afar. He yearned for memories that could be made should they know peace. Nanu laid the entirety of his substantial weight against Arondir's thigh. “You might say that even elves are not immune to selfishness.”

They stayed silent in their thoughts until the mason returned with Isildur, Farthon was puzzled that Meilyr had lingered. Didn't he have to go to his other work site? It was the prompt Meilyr needed to exit. In an attempt to limit further questions

Arondir made assurances regarding the structure's adequacy to his kind's standards. The work had been done with care and minimal waste. That was enough to satisfy them when faced with works by other races. Isildur translated 'Arondir speak' to tell Farthon they thanked him for his time and the crews' hard work.

Isildur grabbed Arondir's elbow as he made swift to walk away. He clung and kept his eyes forward. The dog shook, stretched, and followed dutifully. When the commander-in-training spoke he did his best to barely mouth the words. He relied on elvish hearing.

“Now we are going to take lunch and you are going to tell me what just happened. No, no excuses. I just learned far more about angles and beam placements than my brain can handle. I gave you time to sort out whatever that was and now you owe me more than an ale.”

Arondir resigned himself to this fate. He would have to reveal some context to satisfy the other. It was best get it over with. The elf would be a rehearsal to face whatever awaited him when he returned home that evening.

Chapter Text

Theo wasn't entirely sure that he wouldn't collapse along with the cart wheels as they settled to the ground. If he had to go over one more hill or rock pump his arms might fall off. The nod of approval of the quarry master when he not only dropped it off in the vicinity but in one of the slots for equipment almost made the extra effort worth it. The gentle shoulder pat he received was as good as any verbal praise.

Someone like Emund wouldn't have thought much of it. Theo took pride in approval from all classes. The cadets hadn't been required to return to the quarry to complete their hours. Farthon made it optional. Their site manager would send a runner with the confirmation of their performance. Emund had been all too happy to rid himself of the company he had kept throughout the day. Theo had been taught to see a job through. If those who had to do this day in and out had to do this so would he.

He'd admit it wasn't entirely that selfless. The quarry was closer to home than the work site. Theo was also putting off the inevitable conversation ahead of him. Stalling now wouldn't make a remarkable difference. It was barely past noon. His mother would be lucky if she made it home before nightfall. He wasn't sure he wanted to have that much time alone in his own head to unravel how he was going to approach the truth.

The streets were awash with other early risers. He had never been so aware of the look in their faces he knew was mirrored on his own. Slumped shoulders. Drooping eyes. Hands straying to kneed at various body parts. The occasional yawn. The sound of dragged steps and the collective grumble created their own music. Much to the chagrin of his nose, many including himself were in dear need of a bath. He shuddered to think about what he must be giving off to others around him.

“Theo!” He almost missed the call of his name. At first he thought he was imagining it.

It took him a while to find the source through the passing of bodies. Near the posts that marked the start of the rock pits was a familiar face. She was bright and neatly dressed lacking accumulated grime. The noon sun brought out highlights in her already coppery blonde braids as she waved. She was hopping to make up for her short stature. What was his mother's apprentice be doing here? He shivered despite the heat. Surely Arondir had meant to give him a chance. Did Emund rat him out?

“Oh goodness!” Her delight in catching him settled into a deep frown by the time he reached her. His thought about strangers experiencing his current state was nothing compared to having someone he would see on a regular basis being there.

“Look at you!” She pulled out a handkerchief. Uncorking the waterskin on her person she dampened it before raising it to his face and wiping off some of the grime. She gave orders for him to drink the rest of the container.

“I brought something for what might be aching. From that walk the answer to that would be everything...and... there is nowhere near enough for that.” She was troubled by her lack of planning. He felt a bit like livestock on the bidding block as she circled to examined him. He focused on the delight of having more than a quick drink.

“Um...you didn't have to do that but, um, Vaelah? How did you---why?” He tangled up words unsure of how to not sound offensive when the girl had gone out of her way. It had taken him a few minutes to recall her name. Most of Bronwyn's students didn't show up at their house after lessons. But they hadn't traveled half the way to Pelargir with them either. It would be impossible for him not to remember her after that. He simply hadn't had enough occasion to speak with her himself for the name to stick.

“Dilgran told me about what happened in the training yard. Well, honestly, by the end of the day most we gabbing about it I'm sorry to say. Oh but please don't be cross with him! I was there when he told your mother you wouldn't be home last night. It didn't to take much to wonder why he'd lie. I can't promise your training commander didn't say anything. We tried to hint for people to keep the news away from her. At least any of the superiors. ”

“Thank you but...Dilgran, I get. I asked him. I, I thought you'd be the type to run straight to her. You're...really close and all.” She blushed, suddenly not looking directly at him as his question took her out of her business mode.

“I didn't want Lady Bronwyn to worry more than she already does.” Hair poked out of her braids in wisps. She tried to tuck some of the strands away as she reached into her basket to blindly hand him some jerky and a wrapped cloth bundle, mumbling about there being an apple as well. “There was no changing the outcome. Why should she loose more sleep? She's...We've all been very busy lately.”

Theo's stomach wanted to hug the girl for the gifts. The food went down hard despite the water when Vaelah revealed that her reason that was far more altruistic. His mother had never talked about what had happened when they were captured. They had been left to guess. He only hoped that this girl didn't feel indebted. His mother would never want that.

“Do you think you'd be able to stay horseback without a saddle as you are? If you had support from someone else?” The question threw him off. His pride urged him to shoot back at her that of course he could. Riding lessons were paramount to any army let alone one such as Numenor. They valued it second only to seamanship. Yet the ache in his legs made him see the sense in her question.

“I don't need a horse to make it home.” He was gentle. He was dreading the walk, but didn't need such a show. Not to mention how cumbersome a horse would be in the growing crowd.

“Not home... I have an idea how to help with the strain you've put on yourself but...it's a ways off. A little beyond the city. We'd have plenty of time before nightfall. So...horse?” It was more of a settled argument than a question.

“Uh, yeah I could but...where.. are get getting a horse? To get to the stables would take half as long as it would to get to the coast at the way I'm walking.” There, he'd admit it. He had learned as a child there was no use arguing with a healer about your condition. Even if the healer wasn't your mother and probably being over protective.

Vealah waved him off and started to reach for his hand to guide him forward. Shaking his head he dodged and dipped as swiftly as his protesting body could. From the difference in the way they navigated the crowd, one would think that she was the one who had been training with the military.

Theo was only vaguely aware of this part of the city. It was where the newest and most destitute of refugees had ended up. It wasn't unlike what he had been through in his own first weeks there. His mother had spent most of her time catering to those trying to grab a footing and find lost loved ones. Where the first layer of the new city was seeing basic homes such as his own and even Meilyr's come together, many were still scattered in tents here. He could see the start of groundwork for more permanent buildings.

Those of the area had access to some of the rubble and castoff that was deemed unsuitable for the more prestigious projects like the headquarters he had been at that day. There was plenty of time before the weather shifted for them to raise up shelter. Despite the rejection of those who had been established there, there was a strong sense of duty among refugees to give help to those who came after them.

Eventually Theo was the one to reach out to snatch her hand when he lost sight of her for a second time. She jerked violently until it registered who had caught her. The reaction was unsettling. He had been raised in such a small communal area that his mother's warnings about how women had to move through the outside world differently than men still eluded him. She seemed to settle with his mumbled apologies.

At last they approached one of the blacksmiths in the area. He knew the man to be a friend of Dilgran's father. They had apprenticed together before his friend's father took up with the military as their serviceman. The friend had decided to stay in the outer city in a makeshift setup letting the fires of his shop on the outer limits of the old city go cold. There was little competition or ill will between the two. Just a different philosophy on their roles.

Seeing him at his forge Vaelah made to wave and gain his attention. She excused herself, passing her bag to Theo. After a brief conversation she circled to a set of posts and returned to Theo with one of the work horses. Normally not known for speed, this one looked like it might have mixed breeding. It was not as compact as those that hauled but clearly strong and wide. It nibbled at Vaelah's braid affectionately. She giggled, a sound less childish than it might have coming from someone of her stature, and chided the animal.

“Theo, this is Ashfield. He's a friend who I knew was in need of some new shoes. Thought I might find him here.” The horse snorted at him with skepticism. She pointed to the bag and winked. Confused he looked in and grinned, pulling out one of the apples she mentioned. “Ashfield, this is Theo. Look at the treat he's got for you.”

The horse's sense were up, catching the scent or sight of the snack the moment Theo withdrew it. He perked his ears and blew out his nostrils in a rushed attempt for a polite greeting. There was a goal in mind. Theo chuckled and made to look as if he bit the fruit, watching the animal track him. He paused at the last minute and offered it up for the horse to bite. Instant friend ticket.

“He's a bit broad. Not the fastest. I think he'll do. He's steady. We don't need to go as fast as all that. And the two of us. Well, it's not as if either of us are loaded with armor. I wouldn't want to be a burden to his handsome fella.” Vaelah stood on her tip toes to give behind Ashfield's ears a rub as he bent to take chunks of apple sending a sticky stream down Theo's hand.

“Wait, us? You can ride?” Theo blinked, yelping when the horse got a little skin trying to take the last of the fruit.

The girl froze. He could be wrong but she almost seemed a little pained by the question. Whatever offense he may have given turned into fuel for fire. She settled back on her feet, her hands balled tight against her sides in a way that reminded him of his mother. Or at least someone twice Vaelah's age.

“You have not our mothers' conversations? You know nothing of my family, do you?” She huffed a sigh and threw her hands in the air before leading Ashfield back a few steps. Using a nearby troth as a block she hoisted herself up on his back with as much grace as someone born on the back of a horse. Her triumphant smirk proved that he hadn't withheld his shock. “ Come on now, day's wasting.”

Theo swallowed his pride. He was thankful she didn't continue to taunt him when it took him two tries to heave himself up on the horse to settle behind the younger girl. Ashfield pranced in place with the sudden weight of a second until Vaelah tsked at him. Not accustomed to riding double, never imagining he'd be the one needing help, and finding a place to hold on a smaller frame that startled at touch seemed to be a bit of a problem.

“Oh stop that fimble-famble. Just grab hold!" She huffed hooking his arms around her waist. “You're not that sort and if you were I think I'd have a right chance at sending you to the mud for it up here with you being as you are.”

“I suppose someone like that brute who got you in this mess would have much to say about there being nothing of interest to feel around for.” She grumbled as she nudged the horse forward. “Don't you try to be kind about that—i can't imagine you speaking like that and he wouldn't be wrong.  I'm all the better for it in a world like this.”

Her volume and confidence drifted with her thoughts. Theo thought of all the stories he had heard muttered by campfires on their journey to Pelargir. Even more tales circulated as soon as you were in areas of the city that weren't ruled by society. If his hands weren't already encircled around her he'd seek to do so protectively.

“I'm not sure I've ever heard any of the girls call Emund a brute. Aren't most of them all shy glances and giggles around those types? Ah well. You've probably got a few years left before any of that fuss makes sense. ” Her posture became a little more rigid.

“ I have seen fourteen years, Theo.” Her voice dropped.

Instantly he cursed himself. Theo knew what it was like to be small for your age. Things being as they were in Tirharad, it had taken him ages to hit his spurt. Even if she didn't want to be seen in the same ways as many girls not in the military that trained in the fortress, it still would hurt to be viewed much closer to childhood.

“Well I guess that makes sense. I don't think anyone Mother praises so much would be that smart so young.” He didn't have to exaggerate.

“Does...does she really?” Vaelah turned to look over her shoulder. The twitch of her hands almost made the horse veer.

“I...I get confused about who's who. I'm...Mother's said I have a tough head for some things. But whenever she starts to get excited about her classes, I assume you're the one she's talking about.  It's the only name I hear that much. Oh and someone who stars with an A? Anna? Aida? Something."

“Aidinas, I bet!" She seemed more pleased than her own name being brought up.

"Anyway... If I'd liked healing better than I did, I'd be a little jealous. I know she compared how long it took me to pick up on identification of things to how quick you were.”

 "Oh I don't know all about that. You've a lot of others jealous about how fast you've taken to weaponry. Dilgran said he'd be hopeless without your help.” Theo was more proud than smug to see a hint of her flustered at a compliment. She hadn't deserved his unintentional dismissal.

“As you've set to guessing, let me tell you one thing about 'those girls'." She led the conversation away from the personal. "Most of them would think a privy smells like a garden if you put enough gold on it. If they spent more time paying attention to how much of a powder they add to a remedy as they do fragrance on their skin, I wouldn't have to keep making so many antidotes! ” 

“ In a way I can't blame them. It's what most girls want. Someone rich and well off with a good name. It's what my Da' might want for me. I just wish if they've come to study they'd take it seriously. They don't have to be good...just...focused.”

The two had gone well beyond the outer city trotting onto the well worn merchant path that took them towards the seaside. It was cooler today. There had been talk of storms. There was nothing but a clear sky. Ashfield nickered when Vealah gave him an encouraging pat to step aside letting some carts through. Their wheels were less capable of the terrain off of the road.

“It's like you're talking to him. Sure you're not Numenorean?”

“Da' was a trader in our village. He did well for himself. Not just the usual farming things. Anyone passing with finery would go straight to him. Before the wrecking we might not have been so below someone like Emund's class.” Vaelah mused a little ashamed to admit the similarity, taking a turn directly down to the shoreline where naval practices were held.

“He ran shop but the people most really wanted to see was Mother.” She beamed. “Her family trade was the real treasure. She can spot the best horse in a herd from near a league if she could see them run. Everyone wanted a prized colt or filly from our stock. Or they'd be begging her to evaluating their own. Her word praising your stallion would get you top fee. She was maybe more stingy honoring mares. She always called maidens that drop strong foals. As far back as she can trace her family, horses have been our blood. We even had a few buyers as far as here travel our way.”

“ You love them.” Theo mused. “Why not carry on the tradition then? The Calvary is always looking for skilled riders. I'm sure someone able to run a stable and breeding would be important. Animals need healers too.”

“I've thought on it.” She tilted her head pensively. Theo could be imagining it but he thought she leaned a little further back against him. “I might dabble a bit in it. Lady Bronwyn said she had to do as much back in your village. There are just so many more people than horses that will need tending to as all of this goes on. If you set an arm properly it will heal. You can try your best to do the same for a horse and it's still such a guessing game. Too many have to be let go and you can't even offer comfort or reason.”

Vealah brought Ashfield to a stop at the top of the bank leading down to the seaside. He snuffed, looking back at her as she slid off him with ease. Theo followed with less grace. He wondered how they were expected to get back up until he noticed she had drawn him up next to a boulder that had a mostly flat top. She rubbed down Ashfield's muzzle leading him over to a post away from the sandy dunes and its grasses much to the nickering protest.

“I know I know, it looks yummy. You shouldn't get too much of that now. Look now, this isn't so bad is it?” She soothed him as she led him to a berry bush that laid off the tracks. “Some dandelions too. Now you be good and I'll fix you something extra when we get back, yeah?”

With the horse set to graze she went back, marching past Theo onto the beach side. She turned away from where the canoes were shored and a few cadets were practicing knot work and swordmanship on uneven ground. Theo followed in silence a fair distance to a curve in the beach that obscured their location from those that were training. Slipping her satchel off of her shoulder, Vaelah settled down in the sand reaching to unlace her boots.

“Off with yours, now. “

He didn't sit to follow the instruction. He wasn't sure he'd get back up if he settled down on something softer than the bony ride here. Standing to peel each heel away with a toe rather than his hands he froze. Vealah was reaching behind to undo the laces of her dress.

“Woooah....what...what are you--” he nearly squeaked, looking around him with jitters. She might not have caught up in figure but she was still a girl of a similar age. Even if she wasn't bothered if anyone saw them he knew all too well the things that could be said. The least of which would be the results of her dedication to her studies being questioned.

“Huh?” She froze before a flush quickly spread across her cheeks. “Oh! There's a layer under this! I'd rather like to have something dry to put on after.”

“Dry?” He knitted his brows even as she rolled her eyes. Theo looked over at the waves lapping up at the shore darkening the sediment. “You can't be serious. It's freezing.”

“Exactly! Cold is the best thing for how you feel right now. It helps everything calm down your mother says. It's why some times winter weather can be a friend. If you can warm up after and the person won't catch cold or their parts freeze up.” Vaelah rattled as if it was the most obvious answer. She continued to shed herself of the over layer. She turned her body away from him to shimmy out of her riding breeches. “It's not so bad as all that. Sooner or later you're going to get tossed around in it by your peers. Might as well get used to it now.”

“Or are you going to let a frail girl like me outshine you?” Vaelah stood again with that bossy posture, goading him.

“You forget who's son I am.” He grinned shedding his own shirt. “I know better than to think you've not got fire.”

As to prove her point and not give him an excuse to call the bluff Vaelah marched right on into the surf. Theo muttered as he made his way to the shoreline. He gritted his teeth willing his body not to jump back. For all the advantages he had to the heat, he had grown up with rivers and lakes. Most of those were shallow enough. Water this cold outside of winter existed only in one of the mountain caverns he went once or twice a year to with his mother to collect a particular ferns and mosses.

The healer in training waded up to her waist in the meantime. A tilt of her head was all the challenge he needed. Holding his breath he went up to his own knees and dove head down into the sea. He burst back up seconds later gasping for air. The chill had shocked him but he had held his voice until he was able to breathe air. Salt found its way into his mouth. Stung his eyes. A string of curses came out between clattering teeth.

“This...had better...work.” He shot back at where Vaelah stood a few yards behind. He dove back under and emerged not too far off. “You can't call me the coward and not come in yourself.”

“I...I um...” vaelah looked away from him. Her crossed arms weren't as intimating when they were protecting herself. “I'm not that strong of a swimmer. Our rivers weren't that deep.”

“Well, I guess it's a good thing I'm here than.” Theo stood up, took her hand, and slowly led her in deeper. “Current's not much here. It's easy to float. I'll be right here if you feel off.”

“Promise?” She whispered looking more like the age her height suggested.

“Promise.” He took another step and watched her trip as she started to lose footing. She stumbled forward and caught herself on his other arm. Theo moved once more and encouraged her to float. The look of delight when Vaelah found herself capable of paddling along herself when he removed his hands from under her back was something this world didn't see enough of in these times.

Swiftly she went from hesitancy to starting a splashing battle. The two circled around each other laughing like the children they once were. Suddenly Vaelah went under. He saw her starting to flail and rushed to pull her up. He kicked them closer to shore until they both had sand under foot. She coughed out the water she had swallowed in panic.

“You're okay. Breathe. It's okay.” Vaelah had fear wide eyes. She clung to him desperately as he patted her back. She was too panicked to be mortified.

“Yes well...maybe moving so much offsets the cold...you should...You should maybe just wade a bit. Rest.I um...” She looked around towards the shore, nervously wringing out salt water from her braids. “I'll just...I'll just wait up there and... get my bag for the salve. Right.”

Theo tried to speak but had never been much for words. He felt as embarrassed as her. A man should be better at putting a lady at ease, shouldn't they? He slunk down into the water as ordered until he saw her return with the blanket that had been thrown over Ashfield's back.

His clothes made a sucking noise as his body lifted on his journey to land. Only human, he experienced a surge of pride before the twinge of self recrimination when he suspected Vaelah's rapid blinking before she diverted his eyes might be due to his hours of training. He found himself equally as flustered and annoyed at himself that he had been so carefree when the cling of her shift made it more obvious that her own changes weren't quite as far behind as they seemed when she was layered. Vealah didn't deserve to have things said about her if they were seen. Those starving for gossip never believed there were no lurid intentions.

Ignoring one another, Theo sat down on the blanket. The same handkerchief that he had used to wash up with outside the quarry was wiped along his face. It was drenched before she could finish his back. He jumped when he felt the salve as she poured it across his shoulders. It had thankfully been warmed by its container in the sun. He wondered if telling her she didn't have to work it into his skin would make things worse?

“Do you want to talk about it?” Vaelah hesitated. “The fight. Or maybe what's been bothering you so much?”

“Who says I'm bothered?” He crooked his head back terrified that she had overheard one of his trainers noting a slump in his performance.

“Dilgran. He's worried about you. We talked a little after he came to deliver your message. Your mother didn't seem to question it, by the way. “ Vaelah put more of the lotion in her hand and shifted to his other side. “They...Emund's telling others that you couldn't take a joke about Lady Bronwyn. I don't think I'd like to know what that is...though I've some guess.”

Theo stared silently at the horizon and the slow lap of waves. He knew what had stirred the muck within him. He also knew that it wasn't the insults about his mother. Not directly.

“Arondir isn't my father.” The words slipped out of him before he could think about it. “You...you might have known that.”

“I used to be terrified that he was. That one day she'd tell me that I was part something I let others tell me how to feel about. I wish it were that simple. That my father just couldn't be with us because of what other people would say.” Theo shoved his feet into the gravely sand as he turned his gaze there.

“For most of my life there's this anger that keeps boiling up in me. I tossed so much of it towards him. Or...” His head dropped with his own shame. “Or to mother.”

“I hated him. Really hated him. All elves. Most in Tirihad did. A lot still don't care much for them. People here don't like that Arondir lives with us. More so here that he lives with us but he's not her husband. That or they think they won't admit I'm his.”

“People say all sorts of foolish things.” Vaelah sealed the bottle but continued to kneed at his back. Theo hissed when she hit a particularly sensitive knot the same time as he nodded to her words.

“Mother was promised to someone. Their fathers didn't agree. He was overcome by this...I don't know, something. He took off on some quest. He left me with her before they eloped or they knew about me. She didn't want me calling myself a bastard when everyone else considered it a curse. So she didn't tell me until the birthday before last.” Maybe it was the grip of the smaller hand on his that encouraged him to continue.

“When she told me about the way he took off I thought I had an answer. I got this thing burning in me from him. It wasn't my fault. It got easier to deal with. Arondir helped. The academy's helped. I can just focus on pushing all that into something. Make it useful. Sometimes...it still builds up and...” He scrubbed his hair furiously with one hand.

“The fight?” Vaelah rubbed down to his elbow in a gesture of comfort. Theo nodded, letting the lapping water fill silence.

“We found him. My father. Or...he found us.” Theo's throat was tight with more than the thirst left by the salt. She inhaled sharply at the revelation. “Meilyr.”

“Mei---The carpenter? Heragel's husband?” His eyes flicked in her direction. Theo wasn't sure what he had expected. Her genuine curiosity wasn't it. He simply nodded, drawing his legs up to rest his chin on them.

“Theo! You're a brother!” She let out a ghost of a laugh. “I don't know Heragel well but she spends quite some time with my mother. She's said more than once, I think because of the journey here, how often Menrin will gush about you given the chance. He clearly adores you. To think his hero is his brother! Little Heradis is the sweetest. Always so helpful and..oh...oh!”

“ Do...does Meilyr even know?” her excitement at the revelation dimmed. “You said he left before lady Bronwyn discovered you. Now that you've said it the resemblance is...is there but...”

“Meilyr told Heradis. Not the kids. I don't think. Not yet.” Theo tilted his cheek to one side, facing away from her. “He wants me to live with them.”

“Pardon! You've a fine home! It might not have the same comforts but that's not the only merit to judge something by!” Hearing her defend his mother and Arondir's home made him like her a little more. “Why, they're even moving soon! Mother mentioned her and father were thinking of asking what price they'd want for it. I...Theo! I had no idea. If my parent's knew...”

“No...it's okay. It's nice, their home. Your parents should. ” Theo felt nothing about the fact. It was further away from the academy they all commuted to. Even if they had extended the offer to his mother without the complications now known it wouldn't have worked for any of them.

“But... why?  They always seemed sensible.” Her last sentence tapered off. The shadows her legs cast told him she was now mirroring his position.

“Their new home is near the city center. I'd be closer for classes. Not that it would matter. Not if I did what he wanted.” Vaelah spoke his name with trepidation. “Meilyr wants me to pull out of training. He wants me to apprentice him. Serve that way.”

“Ridiculous! Have him come to lessons! It's not forbidden, is it? I've seen some of the old families lingering around training areas that aren't military. Meilyr would see in an instant you're made for it!” She had stood up and pivoted in front of him, falling into the stance that reminded him of his mother. “Lady Bronwyn wouldn't stand for any of this, surely!”

Theo sighed and stood with a grimace. He walked past her, bent to pick up a rock. He expelled some of the stirring frustration through the throwing of it into the waves without any of the finesse he used to get to make them skip.

“She would... if I wanted it.” He grabbed another stone and repeated the motion.

“Do you? Want it?” Her voice was mostly carried away by the wind.

“I'd still get to do something that at least sort of active. Mother always thought I did really well when something had to be fixed at home. It...it would be a trade after the war that I could do to live on. Mother would feel better that I wasn't on the front lines and could make my own way. Meilyr hasn't made it all or nothing. I'd still see her just...not like now. Getting to actually have siblings wouldn't be so bad I just...never thought I'd have them. It wouldn't all be terrible. ” He reached for another stone.

“That's not what I asked.” Vaelah's tone was soft as she stepped closer to him. He felt the echo of her arm's heat before she reached to try to take his hand. He let her.

“I don't know. Maybe? Or if I could do both somehow? I just... ARGH. It's so UNFAIR! ” He choked, hurling the last of his arsenal into the wave. His hand detached from hers as he swung his body to put his entire arm into the motion.

“He just...he just shows up with his pretty little family. He gets this huge place because guess what? He's just a gift to humanity with his work. Here's all our money! Who cares if you're from away! You're not like them.”

“Now he thinks that he can just march in like he never did ANYTTHING wrong to mother! He still abandoned her! I shouldn't have had to exist for him to want to even TRY to come back. Apologize! Tell her why! He's got this dad thing under his belt now with this other woman doing most of the work –work mother did on her own-- so he thinks he can just sweep in and erase all the lost time, the questions, the scorn we got because he left?'

“ He ran off on his little adventure while mother was scraping by, being cursed at more times than not, keeping care of both us. An entire town didn't even want her there. What did she get from it but me being a brat? She worked so hard to make our home. She didn't have anyone. Not even to talk to. And...and the one person maybe she could...she had to hide it. Because they hated him. I hated him.”

“She could have had help. Arondir left us stuff when he could, you know? They told me that too. He would have stayed with us. He would have helped her. They could have had all this time! We could have. They gave up everything they wanted because of what it would mean for me.” He felt wet trails running down flushed cheeks.

“Meilyr has everything, Vaelah. He built the life we should have had and not he wants this and...I know he worked for it. I do. I want to get to know my siblings. I know he means well. I know that it would make sense. But I...how can I do that to mother after all she's given up? How can HE ask that of her? ”

Theo saw her try to work out the emotions on his face. He heaved in air as deeply as if he had just finished drills. Gulls flew ahead further into the bay. The fishermen who had gone further out must be returning and waste from early markets that flayed catch for residents being dumped. It was discordant with the lull of water but a perfect match for the jumble in his mind.

He stood in place as Vaelah walked closer. Without words she wrapped his arms around him. Theo, to much of his own shame, just cried harder.

“I can't tell you what you should do, Theo.” She whispered up at him as unbending her chin didn't reach his shoulder. “But I've seen you sparring. I've dropped off things while you were planning some strategy thing. You glow. It's not just your anger. Your heart is in it. I don't know if learning to build will give you that same joy.”

“What I do know,” Vaelah pulled back smiling up at him. “Is that Lady Bronwyn loves you. She would never think anything you did took away from her life. She's so proud of you. As long as it was YOUR choice, as long as you see her from time to time, she would never hold it against you.'

“I know...” he croaked.

“Sometimes we need to hear things we know.” she shrugged.

Out of nowhere she tossed the cloth she had wiped him down with at him. He caught it out of reflex. She had reinserted authority into her voice.

“Now chin up. Ashfield is probably getting testy. I myself am more than peckish. If we leave now there just might be something warm left at Fereath's. I'm to pick up bread for dinner and Mother'd hardly mind if I spent a coin to tide us over.”

Shaken from his daze by her finality, Theo found himself completely blindsided at this girl of a fireball in her own right. Vaelah gathered her overdress to slip over herself. She swiped up her satchel with purpose before starting to match up the beach.

Theo trailed, maybe not with his solution, but certainly lighter in spirit. Now he'd just have to gather himself to face his mother and the truth of things with her. Maybe freezing in the ocean and drifting off like a hunk of ice wasn't the worst option. He did like having toes, though.

Chapter Text

“You're telling me... this guy shows up, pounds his chest, and wants Theo to trail after him like he's a dog?” Arondir lowered his palm down gesturing for the captain's son to lower his tone.

It wouldn't have made a great difference. Many were too invested in their mugs and on their platters to be concerned with anything other than burning away the morning's toil. Or, in some cases, last night's revelry. The door that was propped open did little food to make the air seem anything other than stale without circulation.

Coin wasn't generally common for those outside the inner city. This district was close to the ports where merchants, seamen, and craftsmen roamed. They found cheap prices and acceptable offerings to stave off a hard morning's labor and early market's stress. Those who worked for the more prosperous inhabitants also crossed. It made for a place to gather with friends and family who had not made the social climb. There was also a section more concerned for the appearance of belonging to the heft of their own purses. The traffic made this as bustling as any establishment in Numenor from Isildur's tale of it.

Isildur, despite not having frequented the city very often, seemed familiar with many vendors. Arondir was quick to soak up the stories the young commander had collected as they wandered. What might pass as gossip to some could be vital information in an invasion or siege. A rumored hidden wine cellar could be a good emergency shelter or supply depot. A dispute between the cooper and the fish monger over a faulty seal on his barrels would be vital when it came to trusting suppliers of containers. Conversations with butchers, millers, bakers, could all alert them to compromised foodstuffs. A messenger given a free meal for the speed of a delivery would buy a good go-between from the keep to the locals.

The husband of a well respected weaver brawling with a craftsmen over a faulty loom could be a warning to someone seeking apprenticeship with the engineers. Just the same could a quality grinder be found from watching a tossing match at a nightly tavern gathering. A street show to entertain the local children could unveil a talented tinkerer behind the toy that dazzled. Merchants were always invaluable when it came to knowing conditions coming into or headed out of the city. By the time they approached the spot Isildur had marked for midday meal Arondir had taken in more about the part of the city than most debriefings.

It also revealed how sought after his companion was. Isildur raised his hand or voice in greeting to half of those they passed. Some of the returned hails rang of pleasure at the chance crossing. Others were laced with a thirst for the patronage or attention. Or, the wish for a lucrative deal with the military. The two owners of the public houses that did their best to charm him seemed a mix.

Isildur made first for a younger woman. She was the daughter of the proprietor. From the huffing of the man behind him, also the source of despair for a decline in the other's clientele. Arondir smiled as Isildur gave her heartfelt greetings before turning back towards the place they now sat. Arondir was amused at the triumphant skip in the man's step as he hurried in to make sure his cook didn't skimp on their portions.

Isildur wriggled to try to find what position his stool was tilting. He explained he had a rotation. The captain's son made sure never to show too much favor to any vendor over another.

At the expense of patrons who had been there before them, the owner himself came over with bowls of boiled fish with parsnips and onions. Arondir passed on the ale. The keeper was likely to think elves in general were adverse to it. Occasionally assumptions could save him from the greater offense of refusing something of subpar quality. Isildur didn't mind the extra for him.

Isildur waited until he had taken a few bites and a deep swig before he demanded the promised story. Arondir could only delay by a mouthful under the glare. He chewed slowly as he tried to determine how much of the tale was his to tell. He settled with the bare bones. He appraised Isildur of the relation and what each person know of one another. He did not stir in Meilyr's full hopes for Theo's future.

“Should a father not wish to know his son?” The question made them both flinch. The elf thought of his own past first. The healing relationship between Isildur and Elendil was no secret and came at a delay to his mind.

“ Father wouldn't just waltz up to Anarion and take a stroll with him. Even we still have our...moments.” Isildur squirmed again causing a light drumming on the floor and a squeak hinting it might be the boards that were the issue. “This man can WANT to know Theo until the tides still. That's a lot for a boy to take in.”

“What do we know of this carpenter? He's working on the headquarters, but does he believe in the alliance? Is he just swallowing it to be professional? Craftsman or not, that man's boots say his means are not poorly.” Isildur lowered his voice even if they had attracted only casual curiosity.

“ He has sponsorship. Did he come into the city with it? If he's rubbing elbows with certain people... You've seen how the council members are and what we have to push against. They have very strong...ideas...and very high opinions of themselves.” Isildur leaned letting the seat tip as it would. “What's to stop him from deciding him, and his steady job, and nice big family isn't better for Theo? What if he keeps to the rumors that being raised by a... an unwed woman or worse, and elf, isn't healthy for a boy? ”

Arondir's eyes dropped. His hands slipped away from the table entirely. He clutched his knees. It seemed he hadn't had to share that part of the story.

“He DOES, doesn't he!” Isildur nearly lost his spoon as he tossed his arms up both delighted in his deduction and irritated that he was in the right.

“He has been respectful. To Bronwyn. To Theo. To myself.” Arondir said evenly despite the rip of the words in his throat. “How much of his time Theo wishes to spend with Meilyr is up to him. Meilyr accepted that term.”

“I'm guessing from the way Theo went off in a huff, Meilyr's being...assertive?” Isildur paused as the owner came to top off his mug. Arondir waited until he had left to attend to another. Common gossips migrated.

“Not in as many words. Theo may feel so.” Arondir tried his best to return to the meal.

“What if Theo wants that change? You're going to let him walk, just like that?” the elf couldn't judge how the young man was evaluating him. “ I get that you're a passive by nature. Isn't Theo worth fighting for?”

“It is not my right.” Arondir felt the wood of the spoon handle biting into the flesh between his thumb and pointer from his firm grip.

“By the stars you don't!” Isildur hissed. “So he's not your blood. You yourself told me you've been at their side before Theo came into the world. Even if you weren't her partner-- you've more claim to care for the boy than this Meilyr does. Ask my sister. Blood only goes so far.”

The soldier's words drove a belated blow into Isildur the moment they spilled out of his mouth. His sister was still on Numenor. She had chosen to align herself with those standing as isolationists with their own aspirations. If whispers were to be believed, the queen regent may soon be facing adversary on her home front as well as here with the brewing evil. Arondir reached for the other man's hand with his own before he remembered it was not so common for mortal men to touch so unless inebriated. Another bizarre custom he'd never comprehend. Isildur smiled and just nodded his thanks.

Isildur's did not have the same conviction as his father when it came to following the traditions of the Faithful. Arondir suspected it may shift in time. Isildur's passion came from seeing faith twisted and weaponized. For many it was translated into hatred of Arondir's kind. The concern for Meilyr's potential prejudice endeared the soldier further to Arondir. It was clear to now see all the reasons Isildur was defensive. He carried with him his familial and social wounds as well as their friendship.

“ If it is a decision he has not made in anger or I foresee danger, The best paths for us are often the hardest to travel. Some lessons must be learned on our own. I wish only to mark our home as a safe place for him to return.” Arondir worked around his thought. He spoke slowly, not used to sharing himself let alone this part of his history.

“ My father held me from who I desired to be. Though it has led me here, its scar lingers.” Arondir drew shade over his memories, turning the conversation to the other. “Would you not have welcomed Elendil's blessing in your own search?”

Isilidur tapped his spoon against his bowl thoughtfully. He was chewing on the inside of his cheek. His gaze swiveled around blindly. At last he took a deep swig to lure out the dredges of his mug.

“I would. I've also known what it's like to see someone outcast. I know what it takes to repair bonds that never truly formed. Be careful that Theo sees it as a release, not a rejection.”

Arondir nodded. The young soldier was wise for his years. There was no doubt that he would rise to expectations-- even if it was not in the form his father or any other had expected. Standard training didn't often reveal true leaders. Isildur insisted on paying as they rose. After all, if the next outing was on Arondir's charge, he could indulge in far more spirits than substance. Possibly the next time Valandil was able to join him. Ah, so youth still thrived there. It was a balm for dreary times.

Seeing that the money went into the proprietor's hand instead of a fleet footed passing thief, Arondir felt an arm slung around his shoulder tugging him towards the door and away from the clatter and staggered chatter of the crowded room. The sharp light and bustling of people returning from break told the hour as keenly as the bells. This onslaught of smells and sounds was chaotic. Arondir had yet to find the harmony in such large settlements that valued ruckus and production to the song of nature and the reverence of observation. Only was be beginning to recognize the flow to be like those of fish in a stream. Somewhere in all of this there was an arrangement. Perhaps he could find a melody in the discordance of the strings now being plucked in his life.

~*~*~*~

It took her eyes blurring and her head nearly hitting her desk, body begging for a few moments rest, for Bronwyn to realize just how far the candles had burned. She pinched at the space between at the bridge of her nose. She rolled her shoulders back. A trickle of cracks followed her spine setting into place. Oh how appalled her mother would be to see how Bronwyn's craft had damaged the proper posture her mother had enforced rigorously.

Bronwyn cursed her energy. Two nights could not remedy months of poor rest. Not with her work load.

She had slept decently the night previously even with how empty the room felt with Theo at the keep and Arondir being on patrol. She had to fight off only one nightmare. Brnwyn not admit it, but she had taken the spare unwashed of Arondir's. Elves did not perspire as much as humans. That didn't mean she couldn't tell his own scent combined with herbs she mixed into their lye. The cloth balled up near her and another log to the fire fighting the winds off the water gave her respite.

Tucked away in her rooms, drafty as they were, close to the braises made the early evening air a shock. The nights had an unseasonable nip. It was an early hint that the harvests would be here sooner than later. The thought gnawed at her stomach as she weaved through the bodies moving to home or night merriment. There were already constraints on supplies. Could the fields really yield enough with the distant raids and abandoned surrounding farms to get them through the winter?

If not for the promise made earlier in the day she would not be willingly diving into the city instead of turning home. For all she was avoided in the villages of the Southlands, many now stopped her in this vast outpost. Citizens recognized the emblem on her satchel that indicated her profession. Others remembered of her from her early days helping refugees. They pleaded for assistance. Bronwyn had taken to keeping what she could of certain staples on her for the most common of ailments. She never had as much as she wished or was needed. Hopefully their efforts to train more healers and tend neglected gardens would one day be enough.

The door to Fereath's barely clumg to its screeching rusty hinges. The paint had long ago chipped off in patches leaving only hints of color. Citizens of the old city would turn their nose up at the building and it's windows patched with oilcloth. No matter that the most alluring scents passed with each swing of the barrier. Or that people would line outside the door. Thankfully the lanterns still glowed inside.

The baker was behind her counter, wiping down the surface. Her apprentice was covering the coals to keep the embers warm for morning. The massive oven was set far back away from the customers. The heat was nearly impossible to tolerate in late afternoon when they prepared for the dinner rush.

“Ah! Bronwyn! I told that boy he didn't take nearly enough. You just hold on.” Fereath was a woman of a broad build from hours of kneading, lifting, and hauling. Children and years of better sustenance may have given her padding but there wasn't an ale bloated sailor who secured sails in gales that wouldn't think twice before challenging her to a contest of arms. A specking of scars from stray burns and occasional cuts stood out on her dusky skin. She wore them as proudly as any earned in battle.

“What...boy?” Bronwyn. “Apologies, take enough where?”

“Theo of course!” She paused from heading back to the pantry, folding her hands across her apron. “He was in here oh, about half past the midday. I sent him on with the biscuits you wanted. I tried to get him to take the trenchers too. Or at least the maslin I set aside. But no! He'd have nothin' by rye.”

“ I told him you'd paid me fair this morn'. Just might as well have called me a liar! He's your son true as anything. There's no arguing with either of you. Leolah's girl was here, so I gave her a little extra instead. Thought you wouldn't mind. She's one you're teaching, yes?”

“Vaelah. Yes. “ Bronwyn nodded still a little dazed. She hadn't asked Theo to pick up the baking did she? She couldn't have. He stayed at the barracks last night. “Yes, of course that's alright. Anytime there's credit, please, give the extra to someone in need of it. Stars know that family is doing their share for this city.”

“Oh and I tossed some bits that were a little... off... ” Fereath whispered the last part while glancing behind her. One of her apprentices had wonderful customer skills and timing for the baking portion of the job. Picking up the creation part of the process was proving a touch more challenging for them. “S'for that dog that's been trailing you. Sure he won't mind a bit.”

“I'm fairly certain you will be Nanu's new best friend.” Bronwyn blinked away the lethargy that came with reflecting.

“Whatever you gave him will be fine, Fereath. I just stopped in to give you these..” she scooped up the bulk of the satchel that was much lighter than when she departed. She rummaged through the things left within with a closed eye. Eventually she came out with a handful of small bundles.

“You said the smell was a bit...intense to line your shoes last time. Try adding this to warmed water and soak your feet—if you can ever sit still that long.” They shared a grin as Bronwyn anticipated the retort before she was laughed off. “Perhaps when take take a late morning rest. It may help with fatigue so between the two of you there will be some energy left by the time you lock up.”

“Bronwyn! Lamb!” She huffed. “I only was bemoaning about this well worn sack of mine. Just the old creaks. You didn't have to march yourself out here for that! You've been up and about nearly as long as I have no doubt.”

“Oh hush. Now. For the worse days, this as a tea is best. It's...incredibly bitter. I'm afraid there's nothing to be done about that.” She offered the first two apologetically. The baker's job had done damage over time on her joints.

“Most of what's best for the body isn't a treat.” Fereath's eyes betrayed her own exhaustion.

“As to that,” Brownyn smiled, proudly passing over one more larger purse of herbs. The earthy scent seeped through. “ I think you'll find this much more palatable. It won't be as direct mind you. Pair it with savories regularly for a couple weeks. If you see a difference, I'll give you the ratios.”

“Baking may change the properties. I've not heard it be tested. Rolls, perhaps? Oh! Or to horse bread. You might even have a commodity at your hands –though you can barely breathe for demand already. I won't have much more from the keep's gardens and I've little space for my own plot. You'd have to find your own supplier.”

“You hear this one?” Fereath turned to one of her apprentices, the one who had a better all over performance. “She's the one worried about not seeing I charge her fair!”

The sound of the rusty door stopped a repeat of the frequent back and forth. Bronwyn flinched. She had tarried too long. The bakers were trying to close up and her lingering had just left them here to serve someone else.

“Oh thank goodness I made it!” The breathy voice exhaled. Tension slowly rose in Bronwyn's shoulders. “Dergar has been in such a mood today! He was like to throw an absolute fit on Menrin if I left before their father got home.”

“How many times do I have to tell you ladies! If I'm closed up, you just come knock on the back. Ostodher or Kahlla'll have the bags ready. I'll take 'em home if need be.” The owner put her own items down on the counter and disappeared into the back with Kahlla at her heels.

Sucking in a deep breath, Bronwyn turned to face the woman who, in her own fashion, was also a mother to her boy. Or, she intended to be. Bronwyn forced herself to smile. Ever since the other woman's visit Bronwyn had constantly reminded herself that once they had been on good terms. Friendly, even.

Heragel and her children were innocent of what had transpired. If nothing else, it was for the sake of Theo. How could Bronwyn expect him to feel welcomed to seek answers or the company of the other half of his blood if she herself could not extend kindness to those caught in this maelstrom by association?

“I remember that age. They're absolutely wretched at the drop of a pin. I've wondered if toddling years exist to warn you to remember the sweet before they start becoming adults. There are days you're lucky to get one word out of them after that. I've had some mothers with daughters envy the distance Theo kept from me. They withstood a constant prattling of dramatics.” Heragel stared, stunned at the sudden meeting as surely as Bronwyn was.

Fereath returned from the back clutching three bags. Heragel wiped away her shock with a tired smile. A wave of thanks flew from her tongue. From the twist of the baker's features Bronwyn assumed the gratitude was beyond usual.

“ Stop with all that fuss. I'm not about to toss out what's still good. Not when you're the one taking it to those who need it more than someone looking to plump their fowl with it.” She waved the younger woman off.

“Yes but this is so much more than usual! If it weren't for people like you... there's so much need in this city.” Heragel loaded her arms up with the the sacks with much more effort than Fereath had.

“Are you taking these to the center?” Heragel wordlessly nodded to Bronwyn's question. She protested she was fine when Bronwyn moved to intercept one of the bags. “Leolah mentioned you been bringing food for the new arrivals. Thank you, truly.”

Ever since Bronwyn's duties had increased she hadn't been able to spend much time helping new arrivals amalgamate to the town. At best she was able to take trainees once a week. First years gave a hand with the basic care needs. Second year healers and those adopted into apprenticeship tended to more serious conditions. She missed helping sooth spirits as well as bodies.

There was always grief and uncertainty. There was fear, anger, loss. There were also moments when someone would stumble across a loved one. Or, they were shown that places of community could formed again. Those were the sustaining moments. It wasn't surprising that those who were welcomed often returned to assist when able.

“Well, you were one of the first. Who knows if I would have found my family again if such a meeting place and connections hadn't been in place.” Heragel could not meet her eyes. Her tone was meeker than it had been when she had come to the home with her request.

“Might I help you? Join you?” Bronwyn eased, desperately trying to find a common ground.

“ Oh you shouldn't go out of your way! It's late! Arondir and Theo are waiting for you. You should be home.” Heragel's stray wisps of hair bounced around her face as she shook her head. THe motion stopped suddenly.

“Not that they can't do without! I've always admired those who have found purpose beyond their home. It was fortunate in that I chose my path. So many do not. Meilyr would have been happy for me to join a trade if I wanted, of course.” From her sudden defensiveness and reddened cheeks it was clearly a sore spot.

“There is nothing wrong with your life, Heragel. I love what I do, yes. That doesn't mean I don't see the joy that can be had in homemaking.” She reached out to place a gentle hand on the younger woman's arm. There was a slight flinch.

“It's hardly out of my way. It would be a pleasure to see what's become of the evening operations. Theo is as like to return the barracks as home. He's been putting in a lot of extra training. Arondir's with the assembled dignitaries. I doubt he'll come this eve with things being as they are.”

“Meilyr said he was one of the consultants. They met at the new headquarters, I believe. It is quite and honor, being relied on in lieu of an official elven emissary.”

“He is the emissary.” Browyn lacked bitterness. “He's not titled, no. His insistence on assisting the Numenorean army keeps him from taking a command for the elves at the time. It was agreeable to the High King on the recommendation of Lady Galadriel. Arondir's proved trustworthy and they will not have to relieve the front of one more experienced in leadership as well as combat. ”

“Oh! Oh...I...I see...Well if you're certain you have time...” Heragel slowly looked up steadily at Bronwyn.

Fereath cleared her throat. Her arms were crossed again, eyebrows raised at the two. Was it that clear that something was amiss here? OF course it was.

"If you two are heading off, I know you Bronwyn. Let me fix something quick to tide you over. You grab one of those biscuit bundles from the basket. I'll be back with the rest.” Fereath nodded to where she had refilled the large woven bowl that the cheap and stable hard chunks that were a worker's and soldier's midday staple were kept as full as it could. It saved from constant running for more of the frequent last moment addition.

“You know, it's just as well I've met you.” Bronwyn set the sack on the counter and went back to rummaging past all the personal and professional essentials she kept in her bag once more. “I thought I'd send this with Theo but it seems it was meant to be sooner.”

How did things seem to hide more efficiently when there was less to conceal it? Bronwyn found the small linen pouch tucked in the folds of a larger spool of fabric she kept for bandaging. It had hardly any weight to it yet the sight was leaden. Bronwyn had a flash of an earlier exchange she had with Heragel when retrieving what she needed for Fereath's mixes.

“You mentioned how terrible the sickness was when you were carrying Dergar. You couldn't use peppermint as your mother did. Should it be the same this time...” Bronwyn extended the bag to her.“You may wish to speak to a midwife. I've experience attending but no true mentoring. From what I have gathered, this should help. No mint. There is one additive that I've heard some advise against for ladies late in their days or who have had trouble carrying babes. ”

“I've lost only one in twelve years.” Heragel darkened at the stirred memory. She tried to blink the memory away so that it would not become omen. “If Meilyr hadn't had commissions that kept him away for so long I suspect there wouldn't have been such a gap after Heradis.”

“Thank you, Bronwyn. I will be sparing.” Heragel shifted the bags around in her arms to accept. “I...this...this must have been ...knotty to put together. For me, that is.”

“No! Not--” Bronwyn stopped, considering. To deny it would be a lie, even if it wasn't for quite the reasons Heragel would suspect. “I...I have not been neighborly since your family was reunited. It is not the way someone I'd like myself to be should act. This was the least I could do.”

“Here ya' are ladies!” the baker's brutish announcement style hinted that she was purposely offering a break to a conversation that seemed a tad fought. Fereath took the bundle Heragel had set aside and put it in her proffered basket under the foodstuffs. It would be hefty but more manageable to carry. Bronwyn claimed it before there was protest.

Once again the regulator, Fereath motioned for the younger woman to take a second bag. Baked good weren't nearly as heavy as Dergar was to lug around. Besides, Bronwyn would be needing a free hand to get down some of the personal provisions as they walked. Otherwise they'd be going into another's insides with the rest when they got to the center.

“Dearest Fereath, I can only imagine what your children would say of growing under your roof.” Bronwyn was bemused at the toothy grin they both got in their farewells.

The took tentative steps in the direction of the gathering spot. The women set to make the first stitching in repairing the patchwork of what once was the start of a friendship. Once Heragel's comment of Meilyr's time away would have alarmed Bronwyn's suspicions of infidelity. Not to speak of how genuine Meilyr's current temperament was. Doubt washed away as Heragel beamed as she updated the healer on her children's progress since settling. This was a woman who loved her lot in life. It wasn't one who bore the duty expected of her. She brought children into her life not because it was expected but genuine affection.

Bronwyn had not asked about the dinner Theo had attended. Heragel was the one to quickly offer how helpful Theo had been both in chores and encouraging the younger boy. His brother. Bronwyn washed away the sting by returning the compliments that Theo had given the siblings over the past month or so. It warmed Bronwyn to hear someone else praise her son so honestly.

Mutual shock and laughter was shared over an aggravated rant about Meilyr's stockings and the piles of sawdust that came pouring out of his boots and clothes at day's end. Heragel invoked the image of Meilyr swimming in it. It felt so incredibly...normal.

“His mother used to have to wait at the door for him and his father. They'd have to shake off like a dog in her garden before they could come in. They were oblivious to tracking muck through the house. If mother wasn't constantly yelling they weren't to touch anything before washing up after coming in—I'd fear they would have been her most frequent patients. He's just so--”

“Focused.” Heragel nodded with a sigh. “It what makes him wonderful at what he does. If you're not what he's gotten his mind on... Ah well. We all have our failings I suppose. I'm told I walk as heavy as a giant and wake others up far before the rooster or sun would.”

Wherever the conversation may have gone it drifted off into the wind as a familiar face waved enthusiastically when they caught sight of the two. It was a stout woman whose years of work under the sun had left her skin crinkled and freckles extenuated. Silda had been one of the first people Bronwyn had become familiar with on her arrival. She was a pioneer of the refugee reconnecting program. At her feet were several baskets. A man was dropping off what he had collected from those who gave in his area of the town.

True to expectation, Bronwyn had eaten little of what the baker had offered her. She offered the remainder to her friend who had been setting up at her usual spot. The older woman took little before offering the rest of the biscuits, cheese, jerky bits to one of the early arrivals. The meager offering was met by tears of thanks as the mother handed her small son what would have once been something purchased without thought.

As others came the women talked about ways to get some of these visitors together for lessons that in activities their previous professions never required them to do but were essential to their new lives. A fair number of them were discussing helping with the fall harvests. Many of them had never done field work before the raids and destruction. If they were not shown how to be as precise as they could in the reaping, how to preserve, and how to use every possible offering of the land it would be more harmful than helpful.

“Bringing them together could also decrease hoarding. If we can make them see that sharing is a path to communal success not me or them...Yes, there will always be some. I know the temptation hunger can stir.” The elder of the three reminisced.

“We do not need bloodshed of our neighbors on top of what might be waiting them in the times to come.” Heragel added. “Is there any hope of convincing those of the old city to stave of mead this winter?”

“It would probably be easier than asking them to take more of the apple harvest for cider than barley for ale.” Bronwyn sighed. “Or, for that matter, rationing ale to use more for preservation.”

“They've been able to raised two new smokehouses. It was one of Meilyr's first projects here.” Heragel and the others kept their voices low. They only spoke between assisting. Bodies kept words from echoing, but ears picked up crumbs. “We're far too low on salt for usual ways. It's will help reduce the need as much.”

“The salt mines are still blocked then?” Silda asked, whispering in her ear. Heragel tensed realizing she had possibly said too much. She stuttered that it was speculation from those who panned talking about the demand one night drinking.

Bronwyn busied herself with another family. She or one of her sister masters were often included in council meetings at the fortress. Excluding plans on military tactics, the council of lords were usually included. An ancient matter of peacekeeping had led to three residing in the outpost city. Three claimed different sections of the inner city. Additionally one was newly elected for the outer and another for the villages that were under the city's protection. There were also guild masters. As such she found herself privy to many matters she could not speak of.

As innocuous as it seemed, salt was a commodity near all had demand for. The healers used it to cleanse wounds and in poultices. As such she knew bandits and ill creatures of ill had banded to block the road to the mountains their greater supply of it was mined from. It was the topic of one of the most recent arguments.

“ Arondir's spoken to the keep's staff about different ways elvenkind prepare fruits and nuts.” She tried to divert attention to gossip. “They've also ways to direct sun to keep enough light to grow things in windows through winter. Perhaps some of those of the old city might be willing to try to supplement some greens. We're exploring how to do it at the fortress.Then cabbages can stay with those who...”

The line of people, the structures around them, left no need for her to finish her sentence. Most here didn't yet even have solid walls or were packed in with strangers. They wouldn't have such luxuries as being able to have their own gardens to start storing for themselves let alone through the cold months. Bronwyn had felt so blessed, and slightly guilty for the roof over her head knowing she could stay at the keep and give it to another. Yet the window as a source of light in such a gloomy world a thread of peace to her constant worries. There was something about the loss of it that choked her.

All too soon the supplies for the night, such as they were, had been passed out leaving only sacks. Unless marked for return, they were also distributed be repurposed or used as is. The regular gifting was another reason Bronwyn insisted on paying Fereath what and when she could. It was as much of a personal cost as the foodstuffs even if one of her daughters had more access than some.

The distribution had taken longer than Bronwyn had planned. She hoped Theo would not worry too much if he had indeed been waiting for her. It wasn't uncommon for her to return far later than this. Each moment could feel like an age if it was alone in anticipation. She had known that feeling all too well.

Bronwyn's concern didn't mask that a weight seemed to have been taken off of her. She still grappled with a tangle of emotions about the city, their world, everything about Meilyr and his family. In spite of that, returning to the activity that had first given her purpose when she herself arrived, sharing her concerns with those not motivated by a choke hold on coffers, was needed change of routine. That she had been able to find some rough common ground with Heragel was something Bronwyn hoped would make her entire family's life a little easier.

Only time would tell. For now there were farewells to be had and a home to get to before the darkness settled down around her. Bronwyn gave a silent wish that at least for this night it wouldn't be empty on her return.

Chapter Text

Soft light flickered in their window. If Theo had lit the lantern  it had long ago blown out. The framing of the building had settled with the years. Unlatching the door required a upwards yank to pop the wood out of the bottom rut. The usual whiff of drying herbs she kept for business mingled with a heartiness coming from the pot set over the fire.

Theo's nose scrunched as he arched to stir with the same concentration as when he worked sums. He drew up the ladle and poked experimentally. Pieces plopped back into the cookery. She placed her hand over her mouth to stifle the giggle.

“A valiant battle.” Theo jumped. A trickle of spilled broth hissed on the stones.

“Mother! I uh... I kept it on too long. um...Fareath and Vaelah tried to warn me. I think it's more mash than stew.” In their days in their cottage Theo had helped cook from time to time. He had learned a few roasting techniques from Arondir on their migration. She had never seen him attempt something alone own from scratch.

She hung her satchel and cloak, washed her hands at the basin, and investigated. Parsnips, turnip, and cabbage bobbed in the low boil. The root vegetables easily crumbled and floated freely through the watery broth. Here and there what might have been a carrot or mushroom piece peeked.

Bronwyn directed him to spread the wood and snuff out pieces at the edge to lower the flame. At the small pantry she took a handful of oats for a thickening agent. After a deep sniff she asked for two bay leaves and a pinch of thyme. Satisfied she assured him it would be lovely with the bread he had returned with. And, had there been meat, it would be the most tender.

“It is well you cannot remember your first years. My mother had always warned me about not learning to make a home. Scavenging and scraps were well enough for myself. Not a growing boy. Making meals is a much less precise than tinctures.”

Bronwyn was surprised at the surroundings. The little mess left by a largely absent family wasn't to be seen. Shelves looked dusted. Bottles of foodstuffs and of her trade were organized with labels turned to the front. Plants had been watered. Theo's uniform hung near to dry.

“Theo! You've enough to concern yourself with! You needn't have.” Astonishment and concern morphed to suspicion. “What's happened?”

Theo balled his fingers into fists. His chest hauled up and lowered. He gathered courage. Bronwyn tried not look cross.

“I didn't stay at the barracks last night. I...” he swallowed as she raised her brows. “I asked Dilgran to lie for me. I shouldn't have put him in that position. I didn't want you to worry any more than you already do. That doesn't make it right. I know.”

“Why would I have be worried?” She curled her fingernails into her palms trying to focus on belated honesty.

“ I had quarry duty.”

“QUARRY DUTY?” She yelped. “What could you possibly do to warrant that?”

“Emund... “ Theo started to fidget as he started his summary. “ He started saying ...things. Nothing...new. The usual. About you.  That you were doing ...things...to earn me favor.”

Bronwyn huffed. She walked towards the window with her arms stiffly at her sides.  It had taken years to turn direct insults to whispered grumblings in Tirharad. It was one of the things led Theo to be so defensive and resentful of elves.

“Even if that...implication...had merit, I will never understand such slurs. Women are not the majority paying coin for such entertainments. Should they wish few have the means to do so! They were once someone's child. Oh and the wives that do so to pay off HIS debts! And the...selection of companions...are far more likely to appeal to men regardless of any persuasion.”

“The wounds I've had to patch up! The cycles I've had to regulate!” There was a thud as she sat at the table. Her fingers drummed furiously on the wood. “At least women will come to me. Those poor boys...”

“M—Mother!” Her temper and plain speech was startling.

“Oh come now, Theo! I've not told you anything you haven't long ago known about.” She scoffed at his reaction. “Women are not disinclined to their own urges. There are those who prefer similar company to themselves. You may not wish to hear this from your mother, but as I've clearly failed you somewhere if you're so stunned. I'd advise you to consider the care of your partner when the time comes. The rewards are twice fold whatever body they may have.”

“MOTHER!” Theo seemed a bit green. “ That's not—I'm not---it wouldn't be--”

“Theo, you listen to me.” Bronwyn snapped, her frustration misdirected into the lecture.

“If I EVER catch wind of you being any less livid at a fellow soldier for trying to hold someone's personal time against them than you are for my honor---I will have the both of you by the ear and personally drag you to that quarry for three days straight. In the rain!” She was flushed, glaring. Her chest heaved with air. Theo gaped. Out of a prolonged silence Bronwyn found herself pealing into laughter.

“...Are...are you well?” Theo approached her as one would a wounded animal. Bronwyn hiccuped her mirth down to a trickle. Her elbow was on the table, her forehead in her palm as she shook her head. She lifted a finger asking for a moment as she composed herself.

“I have serious concerns on the punishment. Yet, you are both under pressure. You want to prove yourselves. The lack of an occasional brawl between trainees would be a greater shock. “

“ I am disappointed that you resorted to such actions. But, sweetling.” Bronwyn reached out until he took her hand. “I know you. There are much more fickle reasons to quarrel than defending me or your fellow cadets. Your commander has to ignore the distinction. I do not.”

Theo's shoulders relaxed. He stepped closer for a proper grip between them. She ran her thumb over his broken knuckles. From the fight? Or the work?

“You know... if these well worn lies are incorrigible we do happen to know a very good marksman who could make sitting rather painful.” He huffed amusement. She gestured to the other seat.

“The fight wasn't about me. Or them. Was it?” Theo traced the wood grain patterns with his finger. His head shook slightly. “What's twisting your heart?”

“The punishment... Emund's a commander's son. I've done okay but...” Theo sighed, trailing off with a wave us his hand to indicate her. And Arondir she supposed. “If it had been, I don't know, Rodthen,he might have gotten longer runs for a week. Commander Tarazir expected more from us. We had to be an example.”

“I've heard your commanders talk. They've taken notice of you. You've worked hard. It shows. It also brings responsibility." 

"You and Emund aren't so dissimilar.” Theo started to flair at the comparison. “Like it or not, Emund was raised with the expectation on his shoulders. His life was thrown into as much chaos as ours was with the changes around us. I can understand his frustration at behind held back in training.”

“Arondir's one of the best archers ever seen. He's not an ass about it.” Theo grumbled.

“I'm not sure we'd recognize what an elf bragging would be like.” She mused. “You're not wrong. Talent does not excuse personality.”

Bronwyn went to check on the pot. She stirred it a few times, distracting herself while she formed the words. With a nearby rag she placed the pot aside on nearby stone to settle.

“There are two types of leaders in this world. There are those who people follow because of their talents, their strength, their resources. Emund is going to be one of those. He's worked for the technique, the physical element, and he has heritage.

“The second type leads by example.” Theo's blurted in assumption of her coming point. It was a dismissal of veracity.

“Almost.” She returned to stand in front of him. “I have always told you it's important to live by your convictions. Be open and honest. Leave no doubt in your intentions. You never know who is watching and what they may take from it.”

“That is what the second type does—and more. They know their worth. They work to improve themselves. Instead of racing ahead, they reach for those behind. They encourage others to embrace and master their own talents.” She titled his chin with the tips of her fingers.

“Yes you broke a code yesterday. You also showed your yearmates that you saw them. Before things...went awry, at least. How you responded to your mistake shows you accept the repercussions of your actions when they disadvantage you. That will linger in Commander Tarazir's memory longer than the brawl. That is what will make you a leader others will follow. You believe in them. They will believe in you.” Emotion stuck in her son's throat.

Bronwyn ignored the sniff and how he scrubbed across his face with he back of his hand as he stood. Theo cleared his throat excusing himself to grab water for the morning. Then she would have fresh in the morning.

She checked dinner to see it wasn't warm enough to congeal if he tarried. She prickled. It felt like he was still holding back. She busied herself by retrieving her satchel and refilling it with the things she'd need from her own stock for the morning. The healer feigned ignorance as he did a few other tasks after putting down the extra pail.

“I wasn't only in the quarry today.” Theo mumbled as he started rolling the rags she had cut, sewn, and cleaned for dressings.

“We took the stone to the new head quarters they're building. Arondir was there. With Meilyr. They saw. They... they know. What I did.” His speech became faster. “They would have told you! They weren't hiding anything from you. Meilyr wanted to tell your right away but--”

“Arondir thought you should have a chance.” Bronwyn fluttered with warmth realizing she understood the elf's reasoning. Admittedly, it was far easier than some of his stoic mannerisms. “He will be proud you chose to tell me.” She smiled, joining him in his task.

“Is...I Meilyr different?” She wasn't quite sure she had heard him correctly. “From before he left. You said he changed. That something just came over him. Do...Do you think he got better?”

The ceiling Bronwyn looked up to as she considered had seen more than its fair share of repairs. Meilyr had always been passionate. Ambitious. After his mother passed it turned obsessive, anxious, nearly manic in a search for something he only gave hints about. She had never sorted out what it was.

“He was never abusive. Maybe more insistent. I never felt he'd harm anyone threatened. Not intentionally.” That was the murky spot. There were times he seemed to forget himself.

“Heragel and the children shine with what seems to be genuine love. It's not the hesitancy I see when things are sour behind doors. I don't believe how they are with you is performative.” She said as she placed the rolls in her bag and laced the wooden bead through the slits in the top flap.

“I didn't think that!” Theo's jumped at her words. “I mean... was he? How I was before we got here? How I am, I guess. You say it's just me being young but...mother...this rage...it makes me feel like someone else. Something else. I thought I had stopped it but...”

“ Meilyr wasn't as much wrathful as...consumed. Any anger came from that frustration. There was no talking him down.” She searched her son's weary face.

“I can't tell you how you feel in here.” She reached out and placed her hand over his chest.

“Nor do I know what he felt leading up to it. I'm not certain Meilyr would share that part of his life. It's possible that he wants to put that phase behind him. He may be willing if what he felt was the same if you share how you've been.” Theo nodded.

“Sweetling...You've been through more than your share of troubles. Our life was not easy. I know it was lonely for you. We didn't always get on, did we?” Theo gave her a crooked smile.

“ You always tried to be good. There is so much you think you should be, that the world wants you to be, and you worry about your old mum. That's a lot of pressure for a young man.” She shook her head to keep him from denying it.

“It's going to build up. I suspect that this other person you feel like is regret. You've placed too much pressure on yourself. You need to be able to channel that out.”

“I thought I was. With training. And practice. And stuff.” He turned around, bracing himself against the table with his palms.

“So do I. I saw the change in you. It's what made you choosing the path of a soldier bearable.” She lowered her arms and eyes at the confession. She had never voiced her terror on that part of his future. She shook off the melancholy.

“Theo, I promise you.” She shifted to stand beside him in a mirrored position. “You can always create a routine. No matter if it's with the military, or, if you decide to follow in Meilyr's footsteps .”

“Your friends will always be here for you. Civilians are permitted entry. You can always visit them when they're not in session. You can keep to the training rituals with them if that is the most helpful. He might not say it, but I know Arondir loves teaching you.” She gently nudged him playfully with her hip. “Maybe you can give me some tips. Might be about time I learn how to protect myself with something other than a scythe.”

“Arondir won't?”

“I'd have to reveal that in that regard I'm near hopeless. A lady has to keep hold of some of her mystique, no?” Theo snorted. She grinned until another thought crawled over her thoughts.

“I think...I think it would sadden him. Arondir knows I can defend myself. Yet...” She looked into the ambiguous distance. “I am absolutely committed to the saving of lives. Maybe his kind in general understand that pledge in ways humans wouldn't. Assisting someone dedicated to restoration to learn how to destroy would wither a part of him. Even if it was for manners of defense.”

“That...that is not important.” She shook her head, returned to her son's problem. “If nothing else, I do hope you can share these troubled thoughts with someone you trust. Even if it's difficult for the heart to feel what the head realizes. Your troubles would never burden those that care for you. ”

“If you will it, I'll keep searching. I dream of a day we can mend the body and the spirit alike. I want to help you though this, sweetest. If I cannot—perhaps Arondir's kind has a key. He said once that the wounds they fear are not of the body.”

“I just...I just want it to stop, mother.” He voice cracked. “I don't want this anymore. I never wanted it. I can't take it.”

“I know sweetling.” She pulled him in close. Bronwyn adored and hated the feeling of her baby's head once again at her chest. Even if he had to twist to fit in her mind's eye he was still that raggedy ball of energy who'd fling himself at her legs before thrusting up his latest find for her to see--be it a rock, a flower, or a handful of worms.

“I'm here. I'll always be here. Even after I'm gone and you are surrounded by grandchildren. I will be a spark in that heart of yours. I will always be fighting to keep those shadows at bay for you.” She kissed the top of his head again and pulled him back into her.

She was so focused on Theo that she mistook the creaking of the door for the wind in the rafters rattling things about. Then a big warm something was wedging itself between her and her son. She barely had a foot back before Nanu leaped up.

Bronwyn put her first to her lips to contain herself as the dog near her own weight draped its paws around Theo's shoulders and licked furiously at his face. Theo sputtered and cursed.

“Oh rust, rot, stars, and salt! What have you been EATING mutt?” He gasped, scrubbing his face with the back of his sleeve when the dog went back to all fours.

“He is concerned...”Arondir scrutinized Theo himself for injury as he entered. It was truly ridiculous how concern for her son still made her heart flutter like a girl being courted. Their son. Bronwyn held onto that sweet secret agreement.

Nanu started sniffing and turned directly towards where the pot lay at the side of the fireplace. The dog was too wise to go after the hot metal. She didn't stop Theo from trying to wrangle him back. It gave her time to wrap herself around the elf and place a reassuring kiss on his shoulder.

Though he tried to compromise and be more free with his words with them, it had been difficult for him to go against the nonverbal tendencies from both his nature and the necessary discretion required when they were in the Southlands. For her part she put great effort into learning the subtle communication of movement, look, and even breath. It helped that even though they scorned her, the villagers acknowledged her to be an attentive listener.

Though known for a calm nature, she had  been trying to will back more of the enthusiasm and passion of her youth. Years of trying to shrink into the background, not intrude, and avoid temptation tempered it. It had laid dormant until their fight for the Southlands. “I did not expect you this night.” His arm tightened around her.

“I must return.” The pads of his fingers ghosted along her elbow.

“I was uncertain if Theo would come home. I...” Arondir's avoidant eyes spoke of embarrassment. “I did not want you to be entirely alone.”

Bronwyn followed where Arondir was looking. Despite his protest, Theo had lured the dog back on his hind legs and was dancing with him. Her joy blossomed with her realization.

“Nanu?” She called. The dog swiveled his head and pushed off the teenager. He trotted over obediently, sat, and waited. Bronwyn twisted out of Arondir's arms to ruffle at the dog's ears. His tongue lolled out as he leaned into scratches. “Will you be my guardian tonight? Have a nice lie down?”

“Really?” Theo grumbled as the dog mistook the question as a command and promptly flopped down half over Bronwyn's feet. “More like a fur blanket still attached.”

“I believe he's fine with the idea. As am I.” Bronwyn ignored the comment. Say what he would, if only because the dog was a remnant of their lost village, Theo had a soft spot for him.

The dog momentarily satisfied for attention she went to wash and ordered them both as well. He was not as grimy nor caked as some family pups in the mucky streets were. Bronwyn suspected Arondir's attentiveness to Nanu's grooming was in part necessity. There was a difference between appreciating the scents of nature and being in close proximity to wet muddy dog.

“On with it you two. If you mean to eat. I'm half famished. Theo went through a lot of trouble to bring this to the table.” She playfully glared at the barely noticeable skepticism from her partner. “The taste test was promising.”

“Mother...why don't you just join Arondir at the keep? You'd save a walk now and again.” Theo asked from the cleaning bowl as she fetched the pot from where it was kept heated.

“It..it wouldn't feel proper. It already feels selfish to take this space from another family when we could reside there. It's a place for work. Even those with quarters who are married rarely stay the evening together. ” She was relieved her son had become so comfortable with the sleeping arrangements they kept when they were able.

“Really, mother?” Theo snorted, grabbing bowls to bring to the table. “No one has EVER slipped into the barracks?”

“What happens and what is permitted are not the same. Oh! Sweetling, if you move there yourself after your trials—“ She watched the dawning horror on his face as she lingered the line, hoping he'd think she'd be stopping in to check personally. “I expect you to keep certain...remedies...at hand. I'll not have it said any of my son or his year mates have left a maiden in an unintended condition.”

“ Mother.”

“Not all of your fellows are as loyal to the codes and training as you are. ” Arondir poured water from the jug he carried. Bronwyn and Theo did not have the heart to point out he might be missing the core of the discussion.

“Should you have additional needs, I suggest you visit Valandil if he's present.” Theo choked on his drink. Expressionless Bronwyn patted between his shoulders with one hand. Bending she caught his scent.

“Is that... henbane and...lavender? And...” The foul odor clung in traces long after use.

“Beeswax. Mint. Ginger.” Arondir muttered, nodding in approval of the bite he took.

“Wait...” Theo raised his arm and sniffed, wrinkling his own nose. “That's what that stench is? I thought the mutt rolled over my spares.”

“Theo! How did you get into henbane? You know what it looks like!” The plant was highly toxic if ingested. It wasn't as alarming as hemslock but l was not to be taken lightly. Bronwyn's eyes went wide remembering the dog comforting him. She spun, taking a hold of Nanu. She peered into his eyes, at his mouth, trying to measure the canine's breathing.

“When were you in it? Did it get on your face? Have you bathed?” The dog seemed not to be in distress, aside from her sudden handling.

“Mother! It's alright! I swear!” Theo slid out of his seat to pull up at her shoulder. “I washed when I got home and it wasn't on my face at all.”

“You're certain?” She took his face in her hands doing a similar examination despite having been with him long enough that he would have manifested symptoms of note. Theo sighed and nodded. He guided her to the stool that was to be hers. He scratched the back of his neck as he breathed deeply.

“Don't...be mad?” She raised both her eyebrows at him. “So, Vealah found out what happened from Dilgran. The fight. The punishment. He asked her not to say anything. If you can forgive me—can you please try to forgive them too?”

“What does this have to do with--” Bronwyn's brain sorted the ingredients. “ She made a muscle salve.”

“Or found it. You're right about her. She's really smart.” He seemed honestly impressed. “She didn't have a lot of it so we...we went down to the coast. There's no snow or ice around so I just kind of floated in the ocean?”

“Resourceful.” Arondir added.

“Right!” The nodded. “After she put it on we both scrubbed our hands with sand and then water, twice. Before we left the beach and with well water before we got to Fereath's.She was really careful. She made me promise to always double or triple wash if I needed more of it.”

Bronwyn's foot tapped on the floorboards. She stood to go back to the wash basin in part as a delay to rein in her mixed reaction.

“I can't fault her for wanting to help. That's what we do.” She went to sit once calm. “I'm impressed with her thinking of the ocean. If a first year could create that properly, it would be her. But no first year would ever be permitted henbane unsupervised. If she stole it from the stores or asked another student to create it without permission, I can't just look the other way. Nor should I see if she neglected duty to deliver it.”

“What...what will happen to her?” Theo was exhausted. She hated making him feel like he was bringing punishment on someone who helped him.

“I will have to consult the other four matrons. Vealah has been a model student. It could just be a warning. She may have to relinquish access to student stores. Or...” she swallowed hard knowing the chances of such a sentence was slim but it was possible as she too would be made an example. “She could be held back from taking her second level exams for a year.”

First year healers faced an exam a year after entry that determined if they had mastered the basics. It determined if they'd move to more complex work as a second year. Occasionally, those who joined with previous familial instruction were granted status as an available apprentice. They could then accompany a fully acknowledged healer in the field. With the shortage of sanctioned healers, apprentices were rarely afforded specific adoption tying them to a single person. The matrons continued collective lessons and asked those who were accredited to rotate on those they called to assist.

“Even if that happens,” She tried to reassure him. “When her day comes, between us, I will be fighting to submit my offer to take her as my personal apprentice. She may not wish to accept. It is beneficial to be guided by different methods. I am not the only one with interest already. It is not my familiarity with her. She will be a great healer and example for the younger students some day. A leader in the ways you are. “

Bronwyn took to her dinner to create a silence for their thoughts.. The silence wasn't as comfortable as what they had settled into the previous morning. Arondir watched. He weighed his role in the moment.

“Vaelah is not reckless. She would not have acted without considering the consequences.” Bronwyn tilted her head at the elf as he spoke. In general he wasn't wrong. In this case? She suspected Vaelah's might not be completely sensible with Theo involved.

“I guess.” Theo moped.

“I went to help pass provisions tonight.” She interjected to move the focus off her son's misery. Only after it was out of her mouth she realized she could be irritating a new wound. “I went with Heragel.”

She had their attention. Theo straightened his posture. Arondir set his spoon into the bowl attentively. She ignored them both as she broke off a corner of the loaf at the center of the table.

“I'd like to find time to make it regular.” She patted the crust into the broth letting the juices permeate. “Reconnecting with the community is a good reminder of why we're doing this. I think making it routine instead of occasional for the first years might be beneficial. Perhaps some of the first year military candidates might do a rotation of escorting us? It might be...enlightening....to see the full scope of our city.”

“That is going to go over so well with people like Emund.” Theo snorted, grabbing his own chunk and just stuffing it into his cheek.

“It is those who need to see the most.” Arondir added. “Attending civilians will be expected of the enlisted.”

“There is so much friction on both sides of the city lines. It could help ease tensions of those not as fortunate to see those of affluence helping and being a guest in those spaces.” She added.

“Isildur is of the same mind on this. He and his companions give patronage to merchants of different classes in balance. He does not want to be seen as playing favor.”

“Are you sure they didn't just get kicked out of the other tavern?” Bronwyn repressed her smile. Isildur and his close companions were as any youthful men known to enjoy their down time. Yet she'd never fear for her own daughter in their company no matter how well into their drinks they were.

“They all seemed eager still to take his coin.” Arondir offered neither confirmation or denial, running with the underlining humor.

Impulsively she reached beneath the table to press a hand to his thigh. Though mischievous younger side of her would have not been opposed to a less chaste intent, she simply wished connection. She had not been the only one isolated and alone in Tirharad. She suspected his loneliness stretched far longer.

Bronwyn clung to every morsel of what little Arondir shared of his past. He had whispered once that his heart choosing her should not be so surprising. His own birth was a minor rejection of custom. He entered the world in a long lull between conflicts known as the Long Peace. Elves did not wed or, as creation required intent, bring children into the world during war. Morgoth had still lingered at large.

She knew his love for his mother was unfathomable. She had not survived the drowning of his home land. He had been relieved the high king did not request his presence at Lindon. He'd see only the graves of Beleriand in those waters.

Arondir lifted her hand to his lips. He twined their fingers and returned their joined hands to rest on the table. She ran her thumb over his trying to communicate her pleasure at the peace he was hopefully finding with them.

“Ugh. I'm trying to eat here. Do you two have to?” Arondir immediately released his grip. Bronwyn clung. Theo who clearly regretted bantering immediately.

“I would not--” Arondir started to apologize.

“No! No I didn't...sorry.” He mumbled. “ I'm lucky mom's not like, in your lap like the ladies in taverns. You should have seen Meilyr and Heragel. They were constantly touching and stealing kisses. I guess it was kind of nice. Since they've been married for ages and all.”

“It is good to hear. So many children don't get to see that.” Bronwyn tried to be casual, to encourage him to open up. “You were comfortable there, then?”

“Yeah. I guess. ” he shrugged, picking up his own bowl and Arondir's to go scrub them.

“Theo.” She caught his arm. “You can talk about them. Heragel had a lot to say for your favor. She was a bit frustrated you insisted on helping so much. I don't think you're in danger of being asked into their family as an extra set of hands.”

Theo set the cleansed dishes back on the table and returned to his stool. He let out a growl of frustration and vigorously rubbed his hands through his hair. Those same palms scrubbed over his face after. There hadn't even been the sound of a chair moving to indicate that Arondir had moved. He all but just appeared in front of Theo.

“I must return. Would you accompany me? You may stay in my quarters rather than the barracks.”

“Didn't mother just say something about abusing privileges?” Theo huffed, still slumped over, eyeing him through his bangs .

“There are times for exceptions. Having a peaceful place to rest after dutifully fulfilling your punishment seems one.”

Theo glanced at his mother and back to the elf. Before he could protest for her sake Bronwyn was gathering his clean uniform and fetching what Fereath had sent home with her for his lunch tomorrow. Nanu trailed her every step whining in hope of bits left over. The dog reigned himself when Arondir's called to him. The elf lowered himself to instruct the canine as he would a human.

An afterthought, Bronwyn went to her own supplies and took up a vial she had prepared yesterday. She instructed Theo to add a few drops into what he drank the next morning. It would ease the discomfort he was sure to wake with. He accepted her the parcel and endured her insistence that he wear a cloak. With a final graze of Arondir's hand on her arm, she left her son to his care.

“Well Nanu, “ She returned to her bowl and scooped out the chunk of bread that had been soaking. It had sponged up most of the juice. “Can't treat my guardian poorly, can I?”

She rolled the mushy ball in front of him. He licked his chops victoriously. It was gone before it hit the floor. Bronwyn chuckled, pouring the last of the pot for herself and adding a fresh ball of bread. She watched the dog lick at the floorboards, giggling as his tongue then found her leg.

“He'll be alright? Won't he?” She set her chin in her hand, looking down at the dog. He hruffed and curled up content at her feet. She'd take that as a yes.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

At first Theo walked in step with the elf. The city around them was just stirring for it's nighttime revelries. Citizens roamed seeking whatever pleasures they could to make them forget their toils temporarilyl. It was strange how darkness brought out one of two sides. There were those who embraced every once of joy. Others spewed surly attitudes in every step. He wondered how much he was not seeing that the elf picked up on without even focusing. Theo hadn't realized he was staring until the elf's chin tilted his way.

“It must be nice. Not having to worry about someone slipping out on you. A thief or something.” He shrugged.

“There are advantages. And faults.” Arondir kept his eyes ahead.

“There's a downside of cat like sight and being able to pick up whispered plots?” Theo snorted, hefting his bag's strap further up onto his shoulder. Arondir's hand on him stopped them both.

“There.” He directed Theo's vision to a house that was in far better condition than most of the area. “A child cries while its mother pleads with her husband.”

“One of that family, possibly all, are ill. Death's smell is on at least one of them.” He pointed to another house as a figure stepped out of the door. Then into an ally. “ There is a woman selling her child's boots for spirits. Previously a man was...obtaining coin in another manner. A family is being put out to the streets over there. A man in that tavern is placing an excessive sum on a game he is not likely to win. The smell of his fear is...rather worse than the gas Nanu passes to your senses.”

“Wait. You get all that just standing here?” He knew the elf's senses were beyond human. He hadn't anticipated that accuracy. Arondir nodded subtly as he continued walking. Theo could only look at his boots. There was so much he presumed.

“It takes focus. Seeking or blocking. Large spaces help blend noise. A boon or ill itself. What I sense is not all ill. There is a family reuniting in that direction. A babe has just come into the world. I believe siblings were just permitted to keep a kitten. A father granted permission for his daughter to be wed.”

“Nature is balance. You can read others of your kind in ways my kind cannot. Elves observations of other peoples are tinted with bias as same as theirs of us. We must set those aside. Men and elves were not always divided. We are quick to remember Morgoth's dangers and equally so to forget that it was kinslaying that doomed us from uniting against the darkness.”

Theo had been taught broad strokes of history. Tutors of the Southlands weren't keen on detailing the elven perspective. His mother had cautioned believing a single side to any story. She had only a sparse knowledge of the race that watched over them. There were records, of course. More with the return of Numenoreans. The Faithful kept the timeline between their own records and oral traditions.

“Of today. Your penance.” Arondir shortened his stride as he vanished into his mind.

“I spent most of my youth fleeing Morgoth's darkness at my mother's side. My father went to war when I was young. Moments of peace were rare. Lands of many were destroyed. Peoples were drained. I was near what is considered your age when at last I found haven. My mother was parted from me long before. ”

“When I came to my majority I stayed there and learned to tend the new land. I took what my father had taught me before the war and the skills I gathered in traveling to protect those I lived among. I had not wished to lose another home. That is where my father found me once more. The anger in him as he spoke of how he felt my mother's spirit drift away was not unlike the creatures that struck down those around me. Directed at me. Not at those that stole her.”

“His words festered. I blamed myself for her loss. I...I nearly lost myself trying to win his approval once more. For him to see me as kin- not part of mother's murder. Eventually I sought solace in what had brought my mother the most joy- the land. I chose to serve as a grower. He did not approve but found it to at least be of use. Our paths did not again cross until he handed me the written order to the Tower. I suspect he took the campaign to remove me as far as possible.”

Theo gaped up at the elf. Did his mother know this? He doubted the elf had shared so much with her. There was something in his stony gaze, the precise click of his steps, that told Theo he was opening up a wound he wished to stay stitched.

“The loss of choice cut deep. The disregard of my own ambitions, my own well being--” Arondir was slowly flexing his fingers as if searching to grasp for something just out of reach. “ I swore I would never be so callous with a heart that was dear to me.”

“Theo.” Arondir halted, shifting on heel to look directly at him.” Meilyr was not alone in being troubled by your punishment. It was not duty that stayed me, but my vow to let you forge your own path.”

The weight of the elf's words settled heavier in Theo's stomach than under cooked turnip. He caught the undercurrent. Arondir saw more value in giving Theo what was taken from him than adhering to code. He did what he could to give Theo what his own father snatched. An option.

“Encouraging you to explore what Meilyr has proposed is the same. For your mother. And I. We have no desire to push away from our home. We wish you to feel free to do what it is that calls to you.” Arondir lowered his eyes. “She weeps not to think you may have another life, but that you would leave us entire.”

“I ask only you do not let Meilyr's anticipation of an answer settle your heart so soon. I saw how you despaired at his anguish. Meilyr he..he is a father seeking to mend the years torn away between you both. He is angered by the absence and what he could not provide you then. It would not be fair either to base your decision on a man who has ill expressed his genuine concern.”

“What about choosing a intent that's always been clear when I finally looked?” Theo's throat knotted. Arondir's struggle was all to evident.

“If I understand-- It would be kindness. A joy. All the same.” He managed to speak as the keep came into view. “Meilyr seems a man of his word. I see no falsehood in his willingness to share your time. It is not a possibility that must be discarded.”

They passed through the gates with half a nod to those on duty. There were few who wouldn't recognize Arondir. They spoke no more until the elf reached the small bed chamber he had been assigned. It held only the bed, cleaning bowl, a shelf, and desk. Little other than reports and maps and those few rested there. Generic.

“Arondir? If your father came back right now and asked you to return, or to become a part of our army, would you let him?”

Arondir considered the question. He fingered the clasp of the buckle that fastened his ever present quiver. He went deep into himself. The silence made Theo start to regret he asked.

“I would welcome a soldier of his experience to our cause.” Arondir nodded in resolution. “But the man I called father has lost himself. He would not seek me. He may acknowledge me as a comrade. Not his son. Standing on the side of any other than our kind would ensure that.”

Theo absently walked to the bed and sat down. Every part of him felt heavy. He was barely aware of the dip in the mattress as Arondir set next to him. The elf's warm hand rested on his knee.

“My story may share faint echoes of yours, but not a reflection. Meilyr has done what my father could not. The man I have met...I can see how he won your mother's affection.” Theo chuffed hearing a confirmation from his mother's tone earlier in the night.

“ Mother isn't one to be charmed.” Theo sounded more certain than he felt. “She's someone to inspire to be worthy of her company. Meilyr put his efforts into something else.”

Arondir nodded in appreciation of Theo's sentiments. Theo was about to try to crack a joke about needing to tally the elf's ledger, when a rattling came at the door. A messenger Theo didn't recognize stuttered that Captain Elendil was requesting an audience. The elf nodded and indicated the extra linens on a bottom shelf. There was also a small fireplace tucked into the corner's shadows.

Left alone in the room, Theo's eyes wandered to the various scrolls. A part of him itched to dig into them. Were they histories? Surely Arondir wouldn't leave sensitive plans to be so easily accessed. He hadn't even left the door locked. The day's strain added up when he tried to stand. He barely caught himself as his strained leg wobbled. Espionage would have to be a lesson for another day. Right now, he planned on taking great pleasure in remembering what an actual bed felt like.

Chapter Text

“HALT!” Tarazir's raspy boom echoed over the training area. Theo bowed over, his palms braced on knees. Air heaved into his lungs. The back of his uniform was soaked with sweat. The aches that settled in with a solid sleep compounded with the additional strain. Would he ever move without feeling rusted again?

He was not alone. Sorinil, youngest and smallest, was spread out on the ground. His friends hauled him to form before their commander descended form the observational overhang. Even Emund was showing signs of fatigue. 

Today they ran exercise drills layered with sprints endlessly. After the first few sets it was clear this was a conditioning day, working on stamina and agility.  Battles were not quick clashes but lengthy affairs. Sustaining energy was vital.

Cadets glanced silently between each other, confused. The commander made no remarks on their performance as he circled through the lineup. Tarazir was broad shouldered. He walked with confidence. His slim form deceptively hid his musculature. Scars crossed along his arms. Grizzly marks on his neck suggested he was not one to scrap with. If that failed, how he glowered at a person of any size when his  own height was less than average would do the trick.

Finishing his inspection Tarazir returned to the wall on the side of the grounds' entrance. Collecting the six spears leaned against the corner he walked its length. With a few paces between each he solidly thrust them into the ground with ease. Standing before the first he called to Dilgran. 

Theo held his breath as his friend took a spot behind the commander. Others, including Sorinl, did the same when called. Rodtehn, the boy who had tried to yield to Emund was sent to the second. Emund was took his place at the third. Eberil, one of the few girls in their year, was easily one of the best. Not only did she excel with knives and hand combat but she could match near anyone with a bow. She and Elocar went to the fourth. 

Theo was sent to the fifth with Gimaldor, a boy who was his own source of gossip. The only confirmed fact was that he hailed from Numenor without any trace of family. He was one of the few permanent first year residents of the barracks. He was scrapy, witty, and when off duty had a charm that reminded Theo of Isildur's friend Valandil. Firpol, Emund’s cohort, and a boy with a thick street accent Theo knew little about, Palthor, were added into the sixth.

“Today we have focused on what your body will need it to do to carry you through a battle. It is your first tool.” Tarazir bellowed in front of them. “Success, survival, is not only dependent on yourself. It is not only on your unit. The military cannot function without those who supply us with what we need physically and intellectually. You are all aware rely on non-combatant forces directly under military command and civilian contractors. Many do not linger at base come the call to arms. They too will march and be lost.”

“When we are deprived of their knowledge and skill those needs do not cease. Tomorrow you will start exploring other talents to call upon to fill those gaps.”

“Group one.” Tarazir ceased his pacing in front of the first spear. “As of tomorrow you will be reporting to Marshal Madaran in the western wing. He will split you between his messengers, clerks, cartographers. You maybe refreshing on theories of tactics with the perspective of transcribing. You may be asked to deliver messages. Or you may be focusing on spotting flaws in a war plans regarding elements of accounting, geographical, inventory, or folk knowledge and history.”

Theo knew Dilgran was restraining his excitement. His friend longed to have more time and access to the libraries of the city records kept in the keep. Dilgran soaked up the basics of battle tactics when they were introduced. Dilgran might have the build from working with his father over a forge, but his friend was most certainly more content using his mind.

“Group two, you will see Lady Obamiel in the healer's wing. Report at dawn.” Theo was surprised. Given his history wouldn't that have been the most logical place for him to be assigned?

The commander had them wrapped in curiosity. Emund seemed anxious as his brain whirlled over where he could possibly be headed. His was one of the longest lines.

“Group three. North wing, east branch. See our Quartermaster. He will be joined by representatives of the guilds and keep staff. Your tasks will be concerning supplies. Some of you will be seen to the farms and kitchens, some to the weavers and tailors, and others to storage.” Theo tensed. Emund turn a color not unlike a ripe tomato.

“Four. North Wing, west branch. Armory. Expect bowyers, fletchers, and blacksmiths to instruct you.” Elocar looked weary. Eberil was delighted.

“Five.” It was Theo's turn to hold his breath. “North wing, north branch. Engineering. There You'll be dispersed between the sappers and pioneers. Fortifications are not as basic as you assume. You may be assigned to any division of construction.”

Theo bit his tongue willing himself not to sink into childish emotions. Instead of hauling things—though there may just as well be some of that-- he'd be digging and stacking instead. The message was clear. He and Emund’s demotion had been extended. He barely heard the last group being assigned to the stable marshalls.  Fine. He had been able to stand straight and take the punishment the other day head on. He would do the same now.

Promptly dismissed there was a hum of chatter as friends found each other. From the corner of his eye he saw Emund unfreeze. The other trainee had his fists balled. He was taking heavy steps directly at Tarazir. Alarm bells rang in Theo’s head. Trying not to obvious he was brisk to catch Emund before he made things worse for himself. His hand landed on the other’s shoulder just as Emund unleashed a tempered “SIR!” at their commander. Emund stopped and gave Theo a piercing look that screamed the desire to punch him across the training ground

“Cadet Emund. Is there a problem?” The commander was not in the mood.

“What time should the remainder of us report!” Theo's blurting threw Tarazir off guard. Clearly the man had been prepared for Emund's ire but not this distraction.

“ Ah. Yes.” He cleared his throat and called them back to attention. A few who had been close to the doors that took them through the south wing and out towards the city center all but groaned. “Those without different instructions will report on the eighth bell as is standard for drills. You can expect for this schedule to run a week at minimum. After which I will consult each department head on their evaluations.”

“ Your performance may determine your future assignments should you progress into the next level  of training. If an aptitude is discovered I'd strongly consider supplementing your instruction.” For a moment something that once may have been neighborly to the feeling of affection flitted across Tarazir's face.

“None of you would be here if you didn't wish to move into the ranks. However, this life can drain the best of soldiers. But your will, your spirit to protect and assist your people, will not.  Choosing to not enlist or withdrawing does not have to end your service.” 

“There is no shame in this. Only in abandoning your obligations.  It is better to have a shorter chain than one long with links of a different metal. There are paths for you to contribute. There are things you can do that are of more use than an extra sword.”  Tarazir stopped mid declaration. He was going into his memories. Theo became awash with nostalgia for an old woman who always sat outside her cottage offering stories and little treats to anyone who'd stop to give her company back in Tirharad. 

“Of my own year, two pf my closest companions found fulfillment in these support roles. Many officers have stories much the same. We value them no less. Consider this week a chance to compare your accomplishments and your satisfaction this far. The longer one has with a trade, the more skilled they tend to become. Keep that in mind.”

“S—sir?” Elocar wasn't normally quite this demure but jittery in speaking up. He seemed to be weighing Emund’s thwarted self-destruction to against his own genuine question;s reception.”May  I request clarification?”

“Go on.” Tarazir nodded. 

 Theo shrugged with a hint of smugness at a simmering Emund. See? He tried to communicate. Sometimes you just have to ask instead of explode.

“Sir, my mother is of the healer's guild. I apprenticed with her before enlisting. Wouldn't I be more efficient there?”

“ Aye. A blacksmith is more like to mistake him for the hammer than hand him one.” Theo was close enough to catch Fiirpol, wiry with wild curly hair, whispering into Emund's ear. The two had enough sense not to laugh. The two childhood acquaintances often commiserated over the injustices they endured.

“Your history is precisely why you received different assignment. You've already obtained skills. Healers are precise. They are strong of hand and arm. Those are welcomed qualities for any craftsmen. Even passing knowledge of an armorer will be invaluable when you need to pats weapons while encamped. ”

“Trainee Eberil,” Tarazir hesitated with an afterthought for the girl assigned to the same unit.  “I am aware your family trade is in fabric textiles. I have instructed that you are not to be sent to leather work. You are physically capable of any of the required tasks and, similarly to Elocar, have highly attuned hand work that is just as suitably applied to detailed work in weaponry.”

The relief on Ebril's face was subtle. She must have anticipated those who had not seen her in action would place her on the most ‘gentle’ of tasks. Tarazir had foreseen the same risk. Theo had fresh respect for the commander.

Theo hadn’t considered the extra effort she had to put in order to defy critics. On Numenor a woman in training as a seaman might not be common, but it was as accepted as any other profession. Refugees from far away villages didn’t hold that opinion even though wives often worked beside their husbands in their professions and still kept home. Pelargir's lower classes might be flexible but after a certain association it was scandal.

When dismissed for good, Emund spun at Theo. He straightened his stance letting go of the arm. He didn't know if he should be preparing for another blow or a miracle thank you.

“You may all be fine with that pitiful excuse, but I will not be a field hand! A cook! Do I look like a wom–” He caught himself as Eberil snapped her head at him. She intimidated him?

 “I have trained my entire life for one thing. It was not digging up turnips! Firpol's rode nothing but the finest horses since he could sit a saddle! Putting him in the stalls doing the same mucking we had to in the first weeks? Unacceptable.”

“Com'ander didn’t say you'd be sent off ta' the fields or him ta' the stables, Emund.” Eberil intruded into the sphere of trainees. Her eyes burrowed into him. 

Her mixed of clipped and drawn out speech made Theo a little homesick for the Southlands. It was the most common dialect of the area he now lived as well. Spending most of his time with his mother, officers, and his fellow trainees instead of mingling there made the sound strike him every time. 

Elocar shifted in and out of accent depending on who he was with. Already targeted as small  Sorinil and Palthor , who was slower to take to fighting skills, tried to drop their 'lower town' accents. Wait. Eberil came from the merchant class. Didn’t her mother and aunts tend to wealthy clients? Such business people generally took to learning to mimic who they were serving. Why would Eberil want to use what the elite considered a sign of low birth and education if she could erase one barrier to recognition?

“You thinkin' Tarazir doesn't know exactly who your fa'er is? If you be tossed in that lot, the quartermaster already has been callin' him.” She added.

“Ya’ could be shadowin’ the quartermaster himself.” Rodtehn, still fresh with the memory of Emund's ceaseless attack a few days ago, squeaked.

“Coordinating all the pieces of an army and parts of city works isn’t a simple task.” Theo picked up the thread. ”Resources are limited. They have to last. We all know you're a good soldier, Emund. War is more about tactics on the field. “

“Those principles are essential for commanders.” Dilgran offered. 

“Marshalls, too.” Theo moved on to sooth Firpol’s ego. “ They do more than just help a horse cool down clean. They spot and treat illnesses. I knew a farmer who had his own smithy so he didn’t have to come to town or ever call on someone to shoe his horses.” 

“They see to donkeys and other work animals. You'd need to work with someone like Emund to coordinate how many and how to transport and house them.” Dilgran tagged on.

Emund’s face slowly settled into the normal pale shade. The angry hunch of his shoulders relaxed. He exchanged a look with Firpol who shrugged. He hadn't been as bothered with his assignment as his friend. He might be quick to throw verbal jabs but he also knew when to hold back. Perhaps he had already pieced that together.

The yearmates broke apart with a crisis averted. No one wanted to waste a second. Midday break between the day’s assignments was never long enough. Not when drills left them with demanding stomach and muscles yearned for a break going from place to place wouldn't allow.

“ A week without drills.” Dilgran sighed happily, folding his arms behind his head.

“You're going to love your assignment.” Theo focused on his friend. 

“I’ve been waiting for a chance to see how geography effects the battles. Why and when to cross reference map times. Maybe I’ll get to sneak a peek at some of the records the clerks have access to. I could get a head start on that project for your mother!” Dilgran was practically skipping through the halls.

“Project?" What about records have to do with her?

“Oh...” Dilgran slowed his step. “The maps the healers have are ages old. The local knowledge of all the changes to the land are just bits and pieces. So I...I offered to maybe try to update them.” 

“I wasn't hiding it! Would you maybe help me a little? I couldn't tell a weed from a shoot. I might be able to make mark ups of the lay of the land but that's the kind of thing they really need. ”  The bulkier boy leaned against one of the statues that lined the southern entrance.

The ornamental display that greeted anyone deemed worthy of entering the heart of the keep was a stark contrast to the utilitarian nature of the rest of the construct. Most of the walls were plain rough cut stone. The sconces were generic iron fixtures. There were banners at doorways to signify who worked inside. 

In addition there was a small offshoot in the wind where officers met. Within was iconography dedicated to the Valar so that the Faithful had a place to reflect. Otherwise the fortress was a place of business not showmanship. At least it would be as long as funding the actual functions within it was valued as a better use of taxes. The elegance of the welcoming hall and the keep's gardens situated where patients convalesced could see would have to appease visitors for now. 

“No, forget it. It's fine.  I know you didn't care for that plant stuff when you had to do it with your mother. Just maybe if we both happened to be on patrol or something?.” They had to wait for a gaggle of second year trainees to stumble out of the stairwell that led up to the dormitories on the east side of the hall to go to lessons.

“I really wasn't trying to avoid telling you.” Dilgran tugged apologetically at his sleeve, misinterpreting Theo’s silence. He had an imposing frame that was contradictory to his sensitivity. His personality drew more than one snide comment from his otherwise loving father. Dilgran believed those words were of fear of how others might treat him. 

“I haven't really seen you.” Theo shrugged. His response helped the other boy relax. Dilgran nudged his head forward towards the gates when the way was clear.

Both boys had their rotation at the stables after the break. Cadets ran through a cycle of tasks that included stable maintenance, wood and water gathering for the kitchens and staff, and reporting to enlisted members to see if they needed equipment or messages taken throughout the keep. The final segment of the day would be either a traditional history lesson or specifically military, geography, battle tactics, riding, or supplemental classes such as healing basics, foraging, and civilian relations. On the second and fourth days of the week they went from morning drills to the shore for nautical instruction. Only the sixth day was for leisure.

An afternoon in the inner city wasn't so different from the districts both boys lived in. Dilgran's home was just outside of what was seen as fashionable limits. The key difference was movement. Here people strolled with leisure, their shoulders back, filled with confidence. No one dashed madly about passionately shouting. There was plenty of chatter, but  a flock of geese crossing the road or a peddler called out the day's offerings would be a shock. A beggar wouldn't last three minutes.

Headed into the keep as they exited was a group of healers in training. Judging from the baskets in hand, they had been gathering. Theo hadn't listened well to his mother concerning her pupils. Seeing them now he suspected there were similar divisions amongst them as there were with the soldiers. Mostly older girls, with some exceptions,had yellow sashes tying their aprons. He recalled it being their means of distinguishing training level. They led the way with more organization to the bundles they carried, held demonstratively and with ease.

Behind them trailed those with white bindings in majority. Many of them ranged younger in age. They strained to carry the heft of their loads. The heaviest trailed only a few steps behind the leaders. 

Straggling behind the group as a whole was Vealah. Her basket was bursting but with bundles as neatly tied unlike others. She was rolling her eyes as one of the girls of her white-sashed group glanced back at her and giggled. At Vaelah's side was a second year girl about Theo's age carried her own share herself. She twisted to whisper something that made Vaelah crack a smile.

Distracted in attending to an older girl as their paths crossed, a trainee swung out her arm. Her basket knocked into Theo's bag. The plants went scattered over the ground. She gasped in exaggerated surprise. Perhaps the accident wasn't as unplanned as it seemed. Dutifully Theo keeled down to help.

Dilgran dodged her apologies for him. He joined the task while the older classmates stood aside. Theo bit his tongue as he saw the harvest. He wasn't sure if he hoped it would be presented for his mother's scrutiny or not.

“Really, it's not a problem.” The girl was giving him a ridiculous doe eyed expression. Theo’s was teased on and off about being as numb as a door stump when it came to girls. Even he couldn’t miss this as a show. 

Ah. So she was one of those. Memories of his mother’s exasperation at the beginning of the term. 

Daughters of the elite were applying in unexpected numbers to be healers. It gained a title with clout. Assisting the war effort bolstered their marriage prospects. They approached it as a pastime not a calling. Most lacked a genuine drive to contribute  significantly or gain a way to independent support themselves in a socially acceptable profession. They had little concept of the work it entailed. He wondered how any of them would fare the first time they encountered a person with a number of camp illnesses that cause bowels and belly to lose their contents.

Vaelah and her companion stood cornered away. The older girl's scowled as she evaluated of the situation. Was it towards him or the girl? Strange. True, Vaelah had showed her passion.  This girl vibrated with a low key anger reminiscent of the training attitude of Eberil. It seemed a little harsh to be compatible with Vaelah’s compassion.

“If I may?” He didn’t want the girl to embarrass herself too much longer. “Cutting above the leaf node, this part here, helps the plant’s future growth. Those he's holding? They're fine for salves as is. They'll be too bitter for anything meant to be eaten. You should get them before they bud if you meant for the later.”

The girl's cheeks sprung to a shade of beet no unlike Emund’s bristling. She huffed and snatched the annuals from him. The leaders of her group glared down. He caught words about a drudge like him not being with her shoe. 

Rust and rot! Was he destined to anger every well born student? Vaelah's friend, however, had a broad grin. She gave the boys a nod of approval before nudging her friend on. Vealah offered a weak smile to them both as she passed. 

They tried to draw as little attention from the gaggle as possible. Unfortunately the interaction was noted. Desperate for the older girls’ approval one of Vaelah’s year raised her voice. She practically bellowed her commentary about Vaelah’s association with such a rude boy.  Dilgran gripped Theo's reflexive fist. He shook his head in warning.

“I wouldn't hit a girl!” Theo hissed under his breath. “Well, I mean, one who wasn't trying to kill me or the like.”

“You have a way of getting yourself into a mess trying to help others.” His friend tilted his head at him before motioning it to the girls.

The young student who had joined in on targeting them had stepped up to the leaders. He couldn't hear what they said over the clatter of cartwheels and the chimes in shop doors tinkling in greeting to customers. He only needed eyes to see how they now fussed over the wounded with affirmations. Vaelah lingered further back. Her posture made her a shadow of the spitfire that he spent the day at the beach with.

“Brine. Now I really owe her.” As they scuffed along he relayed the whole story of her help and their day at the beach. Dilgran, as was his way, listened attentively. He only interrupted to redirect their steps.

The street turned on to an expansion of the old city that was deemed as somewhat reputable. It was intended to house Numenorean transplants and the 'better of them' craftsmen that came from the villages. If not the look of those walking it, the shape and type stones at their feet proved the place’s prominence. 

The very heart of the city had a glow. Not from innovative lighting or gilding. At its founding Pelargir had been a mere outpost. The homes of the most wealthy were made of a yellow to reddish stone expensively hauled from inland.  The stonework of the fortress itself was the common gray of the cliffs. Both were carefully cut and seamlessly placed so that at a distance it seemed to be carved from a single block. 

The rest of the old city showed the lines of mortar breaking the gray. The headquarters being raised incorporated that aesthetic. The design started with a stable rectangular stone cut for its base. Rounder stones, a look associated with country cottages, rested at the height. A fuss was raised by private donors. The had expected it to follow the pattern that surrounded them. 

The smell of the sea with its salty twinge wafted their way. Dilgran stopped by a stall run by a fisherman's wife who sold most of his his catch to the eateries.They weren't there for the roasted skewers of the portion she claimed as her own to peddle. Dilgran handed her a pouch from his satchel. She whistled through a cracked tooth complimenting his father's speed.

Dilgran's father had committed his day's work to the military. A great portion of his evening was spent working in his personal forge to continue providing for those who had helped him start his practice. Dilgran often ran stray errands like this to keep his overworked father from plunging to an early grave. 

The woman exchanged his offering with a smaller parcel. With a wink she gestured towards a few streets over. There was word that a stationer had set up shop with the influx of potential customers. Paper, even one made from one of the alternative methods that came in with the migrants, wasn’t cheap. According to the old woman, rumor had it they were also buying maps, records, art, and scrolls, and books from immigrants desperate for coin.

Dilgran cast a longing look in the direction. How little time there was before they had to return pained him. Resigned to having to wait, the two retreated to the well that at the center of the business area. Dilgran urged his friend to continue the update as they sat for lunch  .

“Vaelah was just trying to help me. She went out of her way. Now those girls will give her trouble over me and...she might be in trouble. With the academy” Theo absently offered his friend the biscuits he had. He’d lost his appetite.

“If you defended her she’d have worse from them.” Dilgran was thankful for the addition to his meal. “My cousins are all girls. They say boys are wild? They're not counting how words can cut. They were sharp enough without a pass by on a whetstone.”

“She's a healer, Theo. Through and through. It's not just something she does. I'm willing to bet she spends as much time putting in extra hours in that study of theirs as you do with drills.”

“Still...” Theo slouched. His friend was right. Vaelah seemed to get enough heat for being close with his mother. If they thought he favored her she might face the same discrimination his mother had despite her age. Theo had always thought people in cities would be above the petty ideas that were rampant in his home village. 

A stray lump of rags stitched together into a ball arched and plopped near Theo's foot. A group of kids elbowed each other as they made a go for it. They skidded to a stop when they saw it resting under Theo's heel. The mob leader’s eyes slit in defiance until he registered the cadet uniforms. His expression shifted to something between awe and fear. Theo cracked a smile. He scooped the ball with the front of his toe only to lop it into the air back in their direction.

The act evolved into Dilgran being tugged at by half the group into a keep away match with Theo on the other. Somehow half the group ended up piled on top of Dilgran's broad shoulders trying to pull him to the ground. The older boys laughed as they well and truly almost succeeded.  A mother's shrill whistle dispersed the group. Eyeing the sky with regret the boys headed back towards the fortress.

“Thanks by the way. For covering. It wasn't just Vaelah that gave me a hand.” Theo fingered one of the strips of meat he still had in his pack. Knowing he'd regret it halfway through the day if he didn't, he forced himself to rip a chunk off vigorously between his teeth. 

“You'd do it for us.” 

“And yeah, of course I'll help with the map thing. Vealah would be better if you still want to ask her. Mother was really impressed at how quickly she learns telling what is what. Most the stuff I know is just because it was always around me. I did what Mother asked. I could help get samples. Then you two can match them up later?”

“If they’ll let me have a copy of the old map, I could get cloth strips or maybe some of the girls have old ribbons they’re going to toss... pin different colors for different locations for different types. One for food, medicine, and poisonous.  ” Dilgran was immediately making plans in that busy brain of his.

“If those clerks and their scrolls are too stuffy for you, I bet the sappers would love to have you. You could come up with so many new ways to improve our weaponry. Or fortifications. I bet you could probably do repairs in the middle of battle and still defend yourself. We’re lucky to have you, Dilgran. There's no way you'll have to make it through a second year before they ask you to take the trials. Just, don't make me polish your boots will you?”

“Theo. We both know I'd be the one who had to polish YOUR boots.” Dilgran snorted. “It doesn't sound bad, though. The engineers. Won’t need me if they have you, I suppose.”

“Hah!” Theo laugh was more bark. He began walking backwards to face his friend. “I'm headed straight for the pioneers. Trench digging and makeshift bridge lugging here we come!”

“You're not serious.” Dilgran froze, and not to warn Theo of how close a herd of goats were passing. An ill timed step earned Theo a head bump in the rear. Not a pleasant experience.

“Do I have a decent battle brain? Maybe. My reaction skills are alright.” Theo shrugged, rubbing the tender spot. “You're smart in a different way. OW!”

Dilgran thwacked his head. Theo rubbed his head soothing the spot.  It ruffled his hair into a mess of fly aways. 

“You're the one who picked up what Rodtehn had to say about Emund's whining. You’re the one who thought he might assigned to the quartermaster! You stand there saying I can do all these things but you can’t admit you've got a lot of what I have? Being a blacksmith’s apprentice isn’t the only way to get good at making things. ” His snap was making Theo feel like he missed something painfully obvious.

“You might not be into designing equipment they make.” Dilgran rolled his eyes when it was clear the lights weren't clicking on. “You're strong. You're good at listening and intuiting instructions. You have that whole hand work and recipe following trait from being your mother's apprentice. You're not a city dweller that would let the rain fall in for a month before trying to figure out how to patch a roof. Those contraptions need to be made by someone, Theo. There's no way they're wasting your talents on something like burrowing through dirt. “

“...Oh...” That all too familiar ball of tension started to work its way back in between his shoulders. Something about Dilgran's suggestion was both a relief and felt like curdling milk.

“Oh. OH he says!” Dilgran threw his arms up towards the sky. “That's it. After class I'm marching you straight to the healer's ward. This time, I'm asking Vaelah to check your head instead of your muscles! Not wasting your mother's time. I'm sure she knows exactly when she dropped you on that skull of yours!”

“My mother nev---” Theo paused, remembering how she had to stitch up just past where his hairline now grew in his toddling years. 

After waking from a nap one energetic jolt took his mother by surprise. He made a dash for the door. Bronwyn suspected he wanted to go see the mother cat and kittens taking up residence under an old cracked troth. The threshold had proven too much of a challenge for his uncertain gait.

“It doesn't count! It wasn't a drop! It's not her fault she couldn't grab me quick enough. She was handling this really nasty tincture. If she spilled it on her it she’d be blistered and itching for days! WHAT!” Theo fumed, kicking at the other teen's backside as he laughed heartily.

Dilgran easily dodged. The two set off on a chase back to the gate walls. It was a childish game more than respectable exercise. Hopefully they'd escape an officer seeing them be frivolous in uniform. Theo would mull over that concern before he slept. For now, he indulged in being a youthful version of himself nearly lost.

The suspicion Dilgran's words had tickled in him itched at Theo all through a restless night. He only started to drift closer to dawn than midnight. He couldn't even be cross when Nanu stretched awake from his mother's side to plod over and half drape over him. The extra weight and warmth centered him.

Theo gave the snoring beast's ear a good scratch. A hind leg started twitching as Nanu nuzzled closer. Complain as Theo would out loud, even he had to admit the dog was intuitive. Why he had chosen to protect their little family was beyond him. It was endearing that Nanu had left  Bronwyn's bedroll because of his discomfort. The dog's favorite of the three was the one to issue the order for the him to stay with her. She was also frequently the source of food. Theo conceded  he was the last on the preference chain. He'd have to take what he got with the canine just as he would have to accept what he was dealt in the morning.

Chapter Text

The ruckus of noise and flow of bodies mismatched the image if the upper wing of the fortress being an esteemed learning center. Voices competed with the unending clanging, banging, and grinding echoing from the northern and west branches. With the potential of siege conditions the military couldn't rely on access to civilian contractors. This wing had been designed for areas of repair and resupply.

The larger formal workshops were separate from the central complex but behind the exterior walls. Here models came together here and were tested. Though crowded the arrangement saved much time. A worker only had to dash across the common area for a new hinge, a different wire, a shorter nail, to confirm a design model, or ask for an adjustment rather than across the entire keep or into the city itself. 

Smoke and sawdust mingled thick enough despite ventilation to strike fear into any who had ever been stuck too close to a blaze. Recently a gutter system that ran over each department's doors had been installed to douse any sudden spark leaping.  It was a relatively new design that originated in the very place Theo was headed.

Eberil nodded tersely as they crossed paths. She reminded Theo a little of one of the mountain cats he glimpsed once or twice on seasonal forages to the edges of the Southlands. Tall and lithe at first glance, she was firm footed and well muscled. Eberil trained for agility and speed rather than brute strength. Her black hair was close cropped. Her skin tone was deeper, cooler, than Arondir’s. Elocar, at her side, was her opposite in every way outside of the color of their hair.

Shorter than her by half a head, he was boxy where she was lean. Elocar was broad enough that even with conditioning he had not bulked up enough to lose an awkwardly gangling appearance. Despite the reassurances of the other day Elocar seemed just as uncertain about what was ahead. Theo stifled his snicker. If he was to carry the comparison, Elocar was rather like a stag. All body and thin limbs. Yet the hunter in this scenario was now a protectorate. 

Theo hadn’t thought Eberil close to any of their year mates. Yesterday had been the first time he hear her speak much to any of them.  Now that he thought of it, quiet as she generally was, Eberil was quick to volunteered to pair with weaker cadets. Unlike Emund, she did her best to help them improve instead of pressing her advantage. Theo thought he heard she had a sister. Was that the inspiration for the nuturing side that contradicted her show of strength?

As for Emund, Theo caught sight of him as he headed to the quietest offshoot. His attitude might be the only less swayed than Elocars. His scowl had lightened. Barely.

The engineering division was its own sort of chaos. Sawing, tinkering, hammering, and the occasional clunk of something be dropped or locked into place created its own song. United it was possibly as loud as the forges and the armory.

Four other cadets from his unit swarmed together at the entrance. They waited patiently as the woman with a leader's pin traced her finger over a blueprint. A young enlisted member with the sappers spoke with great animation and concern as she did. The department chief was expressionless as she gave feedback. Theo could practically hear the winding of thoughts within the apprentice working up to a full gallop.

The leader had two others pounce on her for consultation before she was able to get to them. Introductions foregone she led them through the workshop to her desk at the center of it all. Somewhere among the jumble of scrolls and instruments piled up she found the assignment sheet. She called out across the workshop to one of the apprentices measuring over a piece of paper to fetch someone. Theo did his best not to gape when the graying director of the headquarters project, Farthon, meandered over. A flick of recognition passed Farthon’s face.

The boy beside Theo was called to step forward. He was asked seemingly random general questions. They ranged from philosophy, logic, and mathematics. Theo guessed this was intended to gauge the way each processed situations and what schooling level they had. Two others went before him

“Good to see you on the other side of things, lad.” Farthon didn’t dodge their association when he was called for. Farthon wore no uniform or badge. That made him a trusted contractor. A retired person would still claim insignia on base.

“You as well, sir.”

His first questions concerned what he would look for before starting a project concerning the terrain in different weather conditions. What were some obstacles he saw if given different settings? Did he have thoughts on how to resolve them? When they had asked about unexpected construction in the field, Theo repeated a story Arondir once told him of weaving branches to create a concealed watch point. Crediting the elf, he contributed himself that it could be repurposed to hide small munitions from enemy scouts. As an after thought he suggested it could also be part of a trapping technique.

The promising start quickly faded. He was clueless when it came to different building materials, units of measurement and weight. Posed with a calculation Theo felt himself sinking into the floor. He croaked out his mind couldn’t hold numbers or envision shapes well. He could guess the problem referred to making something fly or bend the right way. Begrudgingly he admitted he wouldn't  know where to start solving the problem even if given chalk and a slab to write it out.

Farthon, unintended but none-the-less demeaning, scoffed. His assurance that most that weren't born from a purse wouldn't even know 'what end was what' when it came to 'numbers stuff' didn’t seem to put any of the cadets at ease. 

Theo knew Dilgran would have been able to figure out the problem. Apprenticing his father left Dilgran with little time or money for schooling. But he had a quick mind and was curious about their clients intended use of the components they requested.

When they were all tested and sorted, Theo wasn't shocked to be set Farthon’s group. All but two, including one illusive but unwavering confident teammate named Gimaldor, were. The speed he gave his answers seemed to impress the department leader. Strange, as Theo assumed he was orphaned and driven to their shores in need of work. 

“Farthon seemed set on claiming you today. Your lead commander had no preference indicated.” The department head caught him before they headed out.

"You’re a practical thinker, Theo. You learned as a need arose. That's useful for someone in the field. If you’re ever drawn to learning how to solve the problem I gave to you, come to any of this unit. Practicing instruction as well to performance is a vital skill for them to have.”

Theo wasn't the only one she had words for. He wasn't arrogant enough to think he'd be good at everything. Theo just wanted something to erase the dread that this wasn’t a sign of his blood leading him down one path as a default. 

Farthon was full of pep as he led the group to their location. The cadets would work along side those far enough into a project to see results without jeopardizing the work deadline. There was a collective breath of relief to not be sent to practice digging trenches and emergency bridges. They'd get enough of that in common drills. How they fared today would determine if they’d finish their time on the site or be sent back to work with those in infrastructure design.

Theo kept a silent plea turned into a mantra as they turned onto streets he knew. To his dismay they stopped at the new headquarters. It was in its final stages of construction. On one of the roof overhangings was none other than Meilyr.

Acid bubbled up into his throat. His temper raised a flush to his skin. The early morning's coolness didn’t thwart an angry sweat. Had this all been some sort of plan? Did Meilyr overhear Farthon talking about this event and make a deal? Maybe Meilyr offered a supply or labor discount. Why couldn't this man just leave him alone for once? Why did Meilyr keep pushing? Theo just wanted space! How was he supposed to really think about what life would be like, if Meliyr was there all the time?

His fuming eased when he wasn’t sent up to the roofing project. It wasn’t for the risk of danger. An agile cadet was given a rope to secure himself and sent up. Theo spent the first quarter of the morning building up the interior stone walls.

Farthon was only in charge of the stonework. Years of strain had worn his body down leaving him only able to direct.  Though he had enough knowledge of integrated materials, he swallowed his pride and took on capable partners with different specialties to ensure quality. Meilyr’s reputation for his woodwork gained him the position.

Theo’s task wasn’t as repetitive as he assumed. Picking out stones of the right sizing and fit to create something stable was a puzzle. At the marked time recruits withdrew for instruction on measurement and cutting basics. The activity kept Theo focus, dulling the pins and needles of dread.

Following the lesson they broke into groups of three to try creating a basic bench or stool. They were encouraged by the prospect of their creation being kept for the head quarter’s support staff. Less pristine work would be donated to a group helping the outer city immigrants. Theo and two cadets he didn’t know well chose to tackle a bench.

At midday rest the boys only needed to level out the legs a touch. One of his teammates had the clever idea of using what appeared to be two discarded banisters for the backing. The process of creating a hole had been the most time consuming element. The result wasn’t perfect. The back was loose. But repurposing materials gained praise from a passing worker.  

“THEO!”  He was drinking from his water skin when the joyous call sounded. He couldn't help but smile as Heradis ran straight towards him. The contents of the basket she had on her arm nearly spilled all over the ground.

“Are you helping Papa?” Her mess of black hair was tied back in braids. One floped over her head before her bow weighed it back down. She demonstrated her basket of food stuffs. “He never told us! I would have brought more!”

“I didn't know either, Beaver.” Meilyr came up behind his daughter. He scooped her up under her arms and planted a kiss on her cheek. She squirmed in protest despite the grin. She was growing out of such gestures.

“Beaver?” Theo hadn't heard Heradis’- his sister’s- nickname. It wasn't the most flattering of one either.

“It WAS because of my teeth.” She pointed to her two slightly larger incisors. “ Kids were mean, but Mama told me how clever beavers are. They create things just with their hands and teeth that take Papa all sorts of tools to make. That’s fine with me! They’re the stupid ones. I’d LIKE to be a beaver!” 

Theo crossed his arms, puffing out a 'huh' like noise. She was full of surprises. On the surface she was a dutiful daughter. When she got her footing she was as bold as any. The confidence and pride in her -their- father was charming. Heradis was far more sure of herself than he had ever been at that age. He would have been devastated by such taunts.

Theo was caught on how proud she was of the similarities between her and their father. For the first time Theo tried asking himself with her eyes how being like Meilyr be a bad thing. Theo watched Meilyr as Heradis dutifully delivered messages from home. Theo had been absorbed in his fixation with anger connecting him and his father. Had he misconstrued a direct attitude for a demanding one when Meilyr made his request?

Mother insisted Meilyr wasn't like the man who had left her. Theo only ever saw him as a dedicated husband and father. In this moment Meilyr was keenly attuned to Heradis’ words despite the weariness etched into his entire body. Meilyr had to handle a lot of accounts for his own clients and contacts with all sorts of other craftsmen. He was likely to spend as much time running from place to place for meetings as he was on a work site.

“Ah yes! One of the boys mentioned that Farthon gave you a beginner's project.”  Meilyr interrupted Theo's thoughts as he nodded over to where the cluster of the cadet’s work was set aside.

“You made something? Which one?” Heradis was genuinely interested in the work rather than as  her- their- brother enraptured by all Theo did.

“Uh that one there, with the strange back. It wasn't just me. There were two others--” Heradis was weaving through workers sprawled where they would with their meals with bright excuses to get a better look before he could finish speaking. Meilyr tilted his head in silent question. Theo just shrugged. Taking it as permission Meilyr  went over himself.

“It's a little wobbly.” Heradis took a leap of faith and sat down on it. She started rocking in it. “Fun if you know it’s like that.”

“Hmm..” Meilyr scratched at his stubble inspecting the bench closely. “You should have seen the holes I did before my father taught me how to properly use a compass and drill.”

Content with the swaying motion Heradis pointed eagerly at lunch. Meilyr returned to retrieve if for them. Heradis happily took out her own. Without prompting she ripped off half of her fresh roll, pushing it at Theo.

“You've never done this before?” Heradis stopped swaying her legs, giving her seat another look. “I wish I could watch.”

“Papa never brings me along. Mama only lets me bring him midday meals when he's in certain parts of the city. ” She rolled her eyes taking a very angry chomp on a boiled egg.

“It's an assignment.” Theo tried to bypass Heradis' gloom.

His project partners wandered over. Heradis scooted a little closer to her father. The older of the two boys gave a slight bow and flashed her a grin featuring a gap. The dental anomaly bridged her timidity. He offered his hand to her and grabbed a stick to draw out some sort of target in the dirt around them. Theo watched as he taught her some game he said he used to play with his sister. There was a subtle dip in his voice and flinch in his face Theo had learned to associate with loss.

“Theo.” Mielyr lowered his voice. “I truly did not know you'd be here. I thought the talk of recruits was for another tour. This morning when Farthon asked for a few of my crew to assist, I assumed it would be new associated apprentices. I had no hand in this.”

There were already marks on Meilyr’s face where lines would. It was something his mother, only a few years younger, had yet to show signs of. Working longer and more intense hours in the sun had taken its toll. The callouses Theo could see on Meilyr's open palm were spread differently from those from swords. His dominant arm was slightly larger than the other. Even at rest there was tension in his body. He was tired.

Theo had only noticed his confidence before. Meilyr spoke purposefully. He walked through the world with a certainty that he could mold the world. The bravado made Theo sense the echo of the hot blooded youth that ran off to quest. Meilyr’s bones cracked as he stood. 

Here was a man just trying to get by. Meilyr had a lot to prove. He had a family to provide for. A community was in dire need of his skills. Yes, Meilyr had made mistakes, choices that hurt his mother unknowingly. But would Meilyr have given over the key to destroying an entire part of the world as Theo had? 

Who was he to judge? How did he know that Mielyr wouldn't have stayed if he had known about a baby? Theo looked down at his knees. Air tightened in his chest. Guilt was never comfortable.

“Theo?” The man- his father- the term finally truly setting in his brain, spoke out his name.  The concern in his face helped Theo’s thoughts stop swimming. 

“Could...could you show me what we did wrong with the bench?” Theo’s palms were clammy. The request cleared the clog in the air between them. There was relief in Meilyr’s voice as he acquiesced. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

“ Lady Bronwyn? Is there a separate dispensary for the herbs from the seeds?” Vaelah's arms were heavy with baskets. Into the crook of her elbow a row of pouch strings swayed. She strained but did not complain.

“I'll take those, young miss.” Silda came over to relieve her of the items she hefted, sorting them at her feet for others to carry. Vaelah showed Silda which mark was for the turnips, carrots, beets, onions, and which were for leafy vegetables that could be kept in small pots inside where there were windows when frosts set in.

Bronwyn had gone to her own battle to convince the city council leaders, and slightly less abrasive confrontation with the quartermaster, to approve of this endeavor. The Queen Regent’s passion and experience seeing to the provisions of a nation won them over. It was just one more power struggle within the council. Involved parties were torn between loyalty to old vows, their love of power, and wondering if they were backing the wrong horse. There were whispers that Numenor was on the brink of civil war themselves. In the end they took the offering of the island’s coffers. 

Most of the refugees did not have roof of their own let alone a garden. Established farmers already were into their growing season. This year’s yields were spoken for. As things stood, there was little chance winter wouldn't bring great suffering. There was little time to waste.

Just beyond the city’s expansion there was unsettled land that could eventually be turned to proper tiled crops. Distance from daily essentials, many families hadn't had enough incentive to settle there. They needed tangible encouragement. After making estimates of  the usual crowds at food lines with Silda, Heragel, and Leolah, Bronwyn marched to entice the farmer’s guild. 

In exchange for a homestead grant next spring, migrants would be asked to do what they could this season with the virgin soil.  Common land would be parceled out into sections for planting late season crops. The makeshift farmers would split whatever harvest evenly. Some hackles went up over letting any food escape the more affluent. Countering that the less they had to supplement the poor with  would lead to less rationing for the upper classes calmed the majority. 

It was imperfect. It was risky. Many saw more likely means of work in city limits. Quickly Bronwyn's fears were swiftly abolished. Families flocked to make their mark. Neighbors worked out rotated schedules so that they would take care of one another’s plots and keep their temporary jobs in the city. 

To meet demand and open the program up to those unable to travel, the group decided to also provide the seeds for home grown plants. In exchange the recipient agreed to also grow, harvest, and deliver commonly needed herbs and plants to local healers independent from the military. This would allevate the drain on the academy's gardens. 

Refugees had already been lining up when Bronwyn and her students arrived. The dispensary was the perfect opportunity to initiate the trainees to need for relief efforts in the outer city. If nothing else, it had been a good lesson for the beginners on dreaded tedious practice of  seed gathering.

Vaelah accepted the task as her penance for her recent infraction. Inquiry revealed she had gone to the eldest of the four leading healers, Obamiel, to ask for a tutorial on the ointment. Vaelah told the matron she wanted to be able to make something useful to workers and soldiers alike. Bronwyn believed there was truth in it. She wasn’t the only one who rewarded ambition.

Obamiel declined but mused that Daireal had mentioned she may be giving that very lesson to a set of her students. Tonight, perhaps, given the right suggestion. Students weren’t banned from observing others' lessons. Most weren’t motivated when they were restricted to only watching. Vaelah wasn't most students. She and her friend who had been enrolled in the class, Aidinas, recreated it in their practice time. With Aidinas being the practitioner no rule had been broken until she allowed Vaelah to take it out of the hall. 

Both girls accepted the consequences with dignity and diligence. If Aidinas had asked for permission she may have been permitted to keep it for personal use. For such a slim violation of disrespecting formalities the girls were given the slightest acceptable atonement. Characteristically, both worked beyond requirements of their punishment and were two of the first volunteers for the community project.

They started gathering a few hours before the usual dinner distribution. Two of the scribe students kept records. A volunteer who came from  farming family who was giving demonstrations for those new to the trade. As the day blurred into the usual time for food lines, Heragel appeared with her usual delivery. Bronwyn's kneejerk reaction to her had eased.

Tonight, Heragel had the children with her. She wanted them to see all the good that was being done. It was rare for city officials and immigrants to collaborate.

Bronwyn left the seeds lines to greet her at the meal ones. Some of Bronwyn's students, to her delight, chose to stay to help after being excused. Vaelah's friend was among them. All Bronwyn knew about the girl was that Aidinas had started her training not first with a community healer but at the fortress the year before. Daireal was incredibly fond of her. 

“Mother, this is incredible!” The voice made her jump.

“Theo! What are you--” Silence fell. Meilyr followed close behind. She gave him a brief nod.

She had mixed feelings when Theo told her about his days working alongside the carpenter. Part of her was pleased that Theo was giving the trade and Meilyr a chance. Apprehension started to creep in when after the third day Theo shyly asked if he could stay the evening with the family.  Then the next night and more after. Their current assignment was on the other side of town. Meilyr's home was closer.

Theo insisted that if she was uneasy he'd stay in the fortress' dormitories. No, this was good, Bronwyn tried to believe the sentiment she told him. Situations like this were important to consider. It was best to taste how he'd fit into their daily rhythms. Secretly her self assurances hadn't made the previous two nights any less restless for her in the silence of his absence.

“Really? It’s been talked about all over the fortress. ” Theo scrunched his features not understanding why she was puzzled. “Heragel said she and the kids would be here.  Meilyr had to drop off some stuff nearby. ”

“Well yes,” Bronwyn wiped her hands on the front of the smock she was wearing. “ I thought you'd want to rest instead of seeing something so trivial." 

“Bronwyn!” Meilyr groaned. “ Heragel’s been telling us how much larger this was going to be than usual affair.”

“Didn't the seed thing start hours ago? They've still got a line by the scribes.” Theo nudged his head in that direction.

“Actually...” Bronwyn twisted at the sound of Vaelah's voice. Heradis gave a slight squeal and dashed to crush Vaelah with a hug. The teen preened despite her weariness.

“We've been gathering and transporting since this morning.” Aidinas was a shadow behind her.

Bronwyn could heard a slight pop as Aidinas folded and pulled her arms back behind her to ease the pressure from being bent over. 

“Speaking of that...” Vealah was passionate around those she was comfortable. In front of Meilyr, who she knew less than the children, she was subdued. “ We’ve needed to take a waiting list of names.”

“May we access the storage room to start on extracting more seedlings? They've all been told they'll have to finish drying them.”  Aidinas made the request as the elder of the two. The flurry of harvesting done by the students was to replenish next year’s stockpile not to hand out before they were ready to plant.

“If we divide them this evening, we can have the next down here for the morning meal collection.” Vaelah hugged Heradis to her side as a comfort.

“That sounds like a good way to cause a fuss.” Meilyr crossed his arms, scratching his line of a beard in that tick he'd had since he first sprouted hair that Bronwyn was so familiar with. “ A lot of hungry mouths might say you’ve broken promises.”

“The scribes added a clause that they cannot be held accountable for seeds planted to early. They’ll also be moved to the first of the line for prepared seed next spring.” Aidinas wasn’t intimidated by the older man. 

So many ifs! If the families make it through the winter. If they make it through should the budding war come knocking at the door. If all the lands aren't destroyed by battle or floods or cursed weather. If migration didn’t bring in a new blight on the crops.  Avoiding speaking brought the hope it thoughts would not be prophecy.

“No, girls. Not tonight.” Bronwyn quashed their ambition. “ You'll have enough sleepless nights in your future. Best save that motivation for then.”

“Lady Bronwyn, are you not the one insisting on how little time there is? Is hunger not also wound?” Aidinas lifted her chin. It was just shy of talking back. Her steely conviction for what was right shouldn't be tempered down. Directed, perhaps, but not smothered.

“We have more stable drying conditions. Spending time to prepare their plots will serve them better than getting seed they cannot use. It might give them a better yield than those who rush to it without properly clearing and nourishing the soil.” Bronwyn spoke firmly but gently. Aidinas considered the flaw in her opinion and nodded at the logic.

“Rest tonight. Those willing to continue extraction will be excused from the second half of practice tomorrow. For one day. I've stretched the patience of the councilors enough. I am not irreplaceable.” 

“There’s your lesson in politics, girls.” Meilyr jumped to contribute.  

“Tomorrow will be a wash anyway. All of the seamen are saying we've a storm heading right at us. They've postponed the last two days of our building lessons until the beginning of next week.” Theo and Meilyr had been at the dockside creating replacement ramps and decking these last few days.

“Ah. I see.” Bronwyn could not read why Theo’s tone had a jerk in it.

“It sounded like you’d have a lot to do. More now that ran might cut you out a day.” Theo’s words edged out. “Can I help? So you don’t have to stay so late. We could walk home after?”

“Yeah! We can walk you! I bet your house is all filled with flowers and herbs and is really pretty like Papa said his house was when he was growing up.” Heradis jumped at the suggestion. The child's innocent request caused Bronwyn to freeze. 

“I fear you’d be disappointed, Heradis. The house Theo and I lived in was like that. In the Southlands.” Bronwyn let her prideful shame give way to the acceptance of reality.

“ Our home now isn't really the right type for that- you need lots of light and warm dry spaces. And room. We’ll make it like that again someday.”

“I thought Papa said you were able to move from the old quarters. It's not dry there? Papa, won't you help her with the roof? I know you're busy, but I'd help! Theo could too, since he's been working with you. I know we're not supposed to work on Thanking, but---” Menrin's hadn’t been prepared for his daughter to spring to help. It launched him into problem solving mode.

“Of course, Beaver. There are always exceptions when people need help. We’d have to see what was needed, but–”

“Oh no! We're dry, yes. Goodness. It has its faults but it's not as bad at that.” She raised her palms to waive it off. Somewhat embarrassed she was touched by the children's concern. 

“I think what Lady Bronwyn means,” Vaelah had seen the home when she and her mother delivered a homemaking gift. “There's a type of air you need. You can't see the ocean from there. But winds and mist carry off it. Just opening the door on the wrong day could ruin all sorts of work.”

Conditions weren't quite that sensitive. The cling of the sea was constant enough to merit  it in part. Learning new techniques for preservation and growing after living so long in the more temperate Southlands had been an eye opener. Bronwyn exchanged stories of practices with farmers and traders before. She had tales from her father’s childhood and her own mentor’s travels. Bronwyn still dealt in a little bit of trial and error.

“You should come along to the fortress some afternoon after your lessons.” Bronwyn reached out to tuck some of Heradis' hair into place, soothing lingering anxiety. “The healer’s gardens are doing quite nicely! Perhaps it's not as cozy, but the variety there is like no other.”

“Just be careful what room she takes you to.” Adinas grinned down at the girl. “A perfumer could get a bit dizzy in some of them at certain parts of the day.”

As they were chatting, Heragel had handed Dergar to Meilyr. The man showered his youngest with tickles before lowering him to the ground. Meilyr held the boy's arms up, encouraging him to stretch out and strengthen his legs. Dergar looked well balanced enough to start walking any day. The babe was big for his age, causing a few looks or comments by strangers concerning his development, Heragel had confided. Dergar had limited patience, soon starting to fuss.

“May I?” Bronwyn heard the words flow out of her just as Heragel had moved to sweep him back up. Heragel blinked in surprise before gesturing her approval.

“How about that, Der? Can you go see Bronwyn?” Dergar's head swiveled from his father to Bronwyn.  She bent to mirror Meilyr's stance and softly spoke the boy's name with open arms. Understanding bloomed. Dergar took a step that went utterly sideways. He was in no danger of falling in his father's grasp but the sudden lurch scared him into wails.

“Oh now! You're okay. You're doing so well, sweet boy.” Bronwyn cooed, shuffling closer to sweep him up. Perhaps she was coddling him. At the same time she couldn't bare the thought of taking the experience of the babe's first sold steps from Heragel. The comradery of motherhood was far stronger than any dispute.

After a few curious pokes at this mostly unfamiliar face Dergar seemed satisfied. He let out a burp and yawn causing a few giggles. Necessary functions out of the way, Dergar’s tiny limbs wrapped around Bronwyn. His head found her shoulder to be the perfect pillow. The weight was foreign to her arms– but oh how sweet it was! The glaze left Bronwyn when she caught Theo’s twisted expression.

Was he picturing that this exchange could have been him? Did Theo resent that she had been enchanted by the babe? Did it make him think she was ready to be done with him? A greater pain than the nostalgic longing that had filled her moments ago ricocheted through her entire being.

“I...uh...” Aidinas roughly cleared her throat, previously keeping toe to toe, suddenly seemed to itch in her skin. “I'm going to go start collecting the sacks and such. I’ll return them to the workroom to load before I head to dinner.”

“You've done plenty.” Bronwyn tried not to sound authoritative. She'd had to do too much of that with those she was teaching these days. 

Aidinas made quick polite farewells before scuffling off back towards where she had put some of her own belongings. Vaelah was torn between staying. She had already been tip-toeing around the group. She had be discomforted the entire time. Theo perhaps, Bronwyn considered. Vaelah’s  loyalty to her friend won over the others. It seemed Aidinas was acting a bit strangely to someone who knew her better as well.

“We could still walk you home, though! If Dergar gets too tired and Mama or Papa has to take him home first, Theo would be there to walk Menrin and me home couldn't he?” Heradis echoed what had been taught to her. “Girls shouldn't be alone in places like this at night. Arondir would be SO angry with us.”

“Oh, Her!” Theo's chuckle was one that would always bring Bronwyn joy. “You didn't get to see mother on our way here! She can manage. I didn't tell you about the time Mother took down an Uruk herself? You should see her with a scythe. I wouldn't want to challenge her in a corner with a dagger.”

“You WHAT?” Menrin and Heradis shrieked, assessing Bronwyn with new eyes.

“He exaggerates.” Bronwyn squinted at her son. “ I may have dealt the final blow. Theo here was the one that caught it by surprise and gave me a chance. Needlessly putting himself in danger to do so I might add.”

“Oh I HAVE to hear this.” Menrin's idolization of her son grow all the more.

“ Maybe another time.” Heragel reigned in the children. She didn’t speak a lot when out with her family. Heragel ran quite a home. She was also the sort to let Meilyr direct . He, thankfully, had never been the type to expect such things as his manly right. It had just been what suited the two as partners. 

“How about Thanking?” Meilyr interjected. “If this weather is better and you're able to get away from your duties. We'd love for you to join us. Arondir as well, of course.”

“Thank you...” Bronwyn hesitated, scanning Theo’s reaction. “But I think you've had enough of a burden filling this one's stomach.”

“Nonsense! I'm not sure how or who he knows-- these rascals won't betray him, but your son's brought more to our table than he's taken. Truly.” This topic was Heragel's domain. 

“Well someone had to get something somewhere! These two would have given Nanu everything in the pantry.” Theo kicked at the ground with the toe of his belt.

“Nanu?” It wasn't uncommon for the dog to wander off during the day. Frequently it was to trail after wherever Arondir had gone. Still, this was news.

“You want me to believe you two don't have the mutt babysitting me?” Theo snorted. “Every day, just before the sun starts to go down, he shows up pawing at the door.”

“He's not a mutt!” Heradis' hat a bite in her tone. Stars help any man she married if she could master such a look at that age. “He's...he's...some sort of elf dog! He's long, and tall, and smart. Just because you didn't see him come out of some lord's kennels doesn't mean he's not a fine breed!”

“He's not all that rare. His kind are usually scruffy like that. They’re known to be used hunting wolves. Was with a trader once who kept three of them. They held a bear at bay for us. It was remarkable.” Meilyr had a deep laugh that seemed uncharacteristic to his midrange speaking tone.

“He does have an uncanny way about him, I do confess.” Meilyr added when he saw his daughter was cress fallen with the news. “He came to the worksite the other day. One of the workers dropped a mallet up on a step. I watched him spin around, grab the thing, and stretch up on his hind legs so the man didn't have to come down.”

“One night, Papa and Theo were late. Nanu sat at the door and told them exactly what he thought of it before I could say a word.” Heragel added, inflating her daughter agai.

“And the thing with the water! When he was waiting for them!” Heradis spun to Bronwyn with inspiration. “ Menrin sat one of the pails on the well and the other on the ground so he could tie up the pull. Nanu came up and bit onto the pail I didn’t grab. He took it straight into the house!”

“Menrin. Don't you get in on this too!” Theo groaned theatrically at everyone singing the dog's praise.

“Weellll....I wasn’t going to just take the bucket from him! They pressed us HARD at drills that day soooo.” Theo flung his arms up in the air in defeat.

“Pleaaaaase Bronwyn?” Heradis clasped Bronwyn’s elbow as the healer’s hands were busy holding Dergar. “You're always so busy. We haven't seen Arondir in AGES. He never got to teach Menrin that arm blow thing he promised he would!”

“Please mother?” Theo came closer, taking the sleepy clinging toddler as an excuse to whisper his request. Oh blast her, she was soft. Bronwyn blew a stray hair out of her face. She was trounced just as thoroughly as her son had been.

“Am I permitted to bring something myself to this?” She asked. “I can't promise Arondir will be able to come, I'm sorry Menrin. If there is no emergency, I'd be honored.”

“Of course!” Heragel put a hand on her husband's shoulder to keep him from denying Brownyn’s request.  She jumped in alarm “ Tides! Is there something Arnodir's adverse to? In case he's able to make it. Yourself as well. Theo nearly turned green trying to eat radishes instead of speaking up.“

“Not generally.” Bronwyn beamed remembering the pure tantrums he had as a child before she gave up. “Neither of us had reacted poorly to foods. Anything would be fine.” That things weren't so plentiful they could have much of a choice in what they ate went unsaid.

With arrangements made, Meilyr retrieved Dergar from Theo as he began to fuss again. Meilyr reassured an on-edge Heragel that he was fine to mind the babe while she and Bronwyn got back to helping with the food distribution. For their part, Heradis and Menrin went through the lines drawing out children to entertain with games as their parents waited to be called to the front of the line.

When the sky started darkening Theo and Meilyr took to lighting lanterns. As the people dwindled, Bronnwyn felt the dread of having to watch Theo walk off with the other family consume her thoughts. Then Theo gave the children a hug and wandered back to her as the family departed without him. When Theo asked to stay with her tonight and the coming day off Bronwyn nearly wept. Instead she brought her son into a near strangling hug as she started to steer for home.

Chapter Text

Nanu trotted beside Arondir to the other home like it was their normal routine. Theo had gone ahead to watch Dergar while Heragel prepped. Menrin and Heradis tagged along with Meilyr as he bartered his time for favors from neighbors. The children learned a little and skimmed out more time with their father. 

Daireal, the overseer after Bronwyn’s shift, had come down with a chest cold forcing Bronwyn to extend her work day. She was overseeing the handful of third year students to retake the exams to pass onto apprenticeship they had failed as second years soon. Arondir assured Theo that she'd be here as soon as the session ended.

Arondir could not relax waiting for the others. He excused himself, calling the dog with him. Theo shrugged equally confused when Heragel asked if something offended him. Nanu returned repeating his water carrying trick from the children’s story. Arondir had his arms full of timber. He stacked it neatly on the dwindling fireside stock.  Heragel cursed him, waving the tip of her ladle at him in rampage.

“I will not have it said guests are put out in this house! No wonder Theo's as bad as all this!” Theo’s features swizzled up. Why did this come back on him? “That boy must have ants biting at him! Always doing this and that. Look at him! Spending his free time minding Dergar. I caught him correcting the children's after lessons the other day. BETWEEN tidying!” 

“Awww... don't listen to her, Derg.” Theo continued the balancing game where the toddler pushed back on his hands learning to keep his footing. “You're not a chore! We’re playing.” Dergar giggled in response.

“Lady Heragel, you keep a home well.” Arondir reassured her. “We only mean to exchange the favor for your hospitality.”

Heragel stopped mid-wave of the utensil. She closed her mouth as she considered his words. Heradis wasn't the only one charmed by elven ways. The matron gave a slight hmmfh and turned to stirring the pot.

The elf and dog turned their heads in unison. Arondir crossed the floor to open the door. Nanu scampeed out to greet the returning family. Menrin had grown accustomed to the big dog and prepared accordingly, brandishing a perfect maw-sized stick. The moment the sight of fur came into view he chucked the wood away from the pathways of people. Heradis squeaked in delight when she noticed who was waiting for them. 

His siblings, Theo was building the habit of reminding himself, clamored for Arondir's attention. Meilyr gave a nod of recognition before detouring to wash at the  well. Casually he yelled into the house, updating Theo on a supplier’s request. Theo scooped up Dergar and brought him to the door as Meilyr entered. 

Cross from his playtime with Theo being interrupted, Dergar rejected his father's attention. Instead he tugged more eagerly at Theo’s arm. Theo shifted to balance the babe on his hip in the same way he had seen Heragel so he could occupy the little hand with one of his own to placate him. Putting the rest of the meal to simmer, Heradis joined them. She welcomed the quick kiss form her husband, slipping in her own with her own inquiries.

The three stood at the doorway, allowing in a breeze. They watched as Arondir asked for Menrin to demonstrate to determining if was ready for the promised lesson. Meilyr's observed sjeotucally. He all out bristled. He  pulled up his back so he stood full height.  Meilyr cleared his throat to catch the elf's attention when Arondir started showing Heradis a defensive tactic. Arondir withdrew dutifully, understanding. Both children eyed their father, disheartened.

“Papa!” Heradis didn’t know why her father would want to stop them.

“Beaver you don't need to know those things. Don’t pucker up like that. Come inside now.” 

“Papa. I have seven girls in my year! Heradis’ faster than any of them. Stronger too! She can do it.” For all their differences, Menrin was his sister’s biggest defender when push came to shove.

“ I know she could . It's just not --”

“You told us the best ship’s captain you ever knew was a woman. All of the shipwrights said she kept her crew and her boat better than anyone else.“ Theo couldn't have said it better than Menrin. It didn’t make his brother standing up to Meilyr’s word less odd.

“Hey now.” Meilyr scowled, crossing his arms. “ Can't a father just want his little girl not to grow up so soon? You won't need to learn those things just yet . You've got your Papa and brothers to keep you safe.”

Theo head snapped towards Meilyr. Arondir eyes darted as he stood ready to mitigate. Meilyr coughed, trying not to bring attention to what he had said when he realized it. Fortunately the children were caught up in their disappointment.

“Papa. What is a BABY going to do to help? “ She huffed. “You and Momma keep saying there are dangerous places I can't go! What if something happens and I have to come get you? What if you're in one of those places!”

“Meilyr...” Heragel placed an arm on her husband's shoulder. In his ear she whispered about the brewing war. The couple stared at each other. Though she had made no demand, this subtle diplomacy was effective. Meilry sighed.

“Very well.” Heradis jumped with delight. “ IF Theo's the one willing to teach you. His is type of build and ability you’d need to know how to counter. It was generous for him to come tonight, but Arondir has too many responsibilities to meet you regularly. And ONLY if it won't distract from Theo's own training or rest. He's at a very important time in his studies right now, Beaver.”

“ It wouldn't be fair to ask him to step away from his own future.” Meilyr turned his focus to Theo, resignation and hope within his words. Before that moment Meilyr had subtlety tried to lay out the merits of the life Theo would have with the family bit by bit. This was the first concession to his personal will that Theo truly felt to be genuine.

“Nevermind.” Heradis sighed in resignation. She did so too often for Theo's comfort. She accepted the implied expectations of girls to be docility dutifully despite having a drive as ambitious as Menrin. “You don't have to Theo. You should practice your own things. You HAVE to show them how good you are. Then I can tell everyone that I know the youngest cadet to pass the trials ever. I can wait to learn.”

“Hey, Her!” Theo didn't realize until he was closer to his sister that Dergar was still in his arms.  Seeing Theo caught between the two, Arondir effortlessly took the toddler from him. More curious than confused, Dergar immediately started reaching for Arondir's ear. Heragel gasped, calling to her youngest to stop. Arondir paid no mind. He beamed as the child shrieked with glee when the elf shook his head playfully, a little like a wet dog might,  when the fingers pinched at his ear. Seeing no damage done, Theo turned back to his sister.

“Thank you for believing in me, Heradis. That’s not what I want, though. I want to learn, not be some note in a record. I’ll take the trials when my instructors believe I’m ready.” He tried to be firm without dimming the joy the concept seemed to fill Menrin with. “I want to know everything I can to protect you and myself more than something having to brag about.” 

“How about this? If you can try very hard to get your lessons done in class, I can meet you at Fareath’s when you and your mother come to get the day olds for the evening distribution. You —and Menrin if he's done for the day-- can stay with me while she’s gone. It can be part of my cool down. It’s the last thing you want to do after training all day, but it’s important for your body. You’d be helping me get it over with.”

“If that's all right, Heragel. You, uh, I know mother could have used a few breaks when I was younger.” Theo hoped he hadn’t presumed too much. 

“It would be just fine.” She was appreciative of his concern.

“I’d rather you help your mother carry what she needs to the square and practice there.” Meilyr added his own condition. Menrin wasn't overjoyed with the aspect of more work, but accepted the compromise.

Theo started picking up with his siblings where Arondir left off. Arondir offered notes from time to time as he sat on a barrel giving Dergar room to spread on his lap. The elf started a finger-to-finger game with the child. The babe was entranced, quickly picking up and letting Arondir move their hands in a dancing motion. Heragel gasped in astonishment when Dergar would place his whole palm roughly where Arondir’s would be next when the elf pulled a hand back. 

“He can't always even hit my hand in the clapping game!” Heradis’ attention had wavered when she caught the game from the corner of her eye. The wind carried her voice.

“Learning how to move your body to where your eyes are is difficult. You see it in the injured who must learn to walk again.” Bronwyn’s voice preceded her as she walked down the road towards them. Accepting a rushed hug from the little girl, Bronwyn was drawn to the babe and her partner. She knelt down towards Dergar, grinning as the toddler grabbed for another hand to join the fun.

“Be careful of this one’s charms.” Bronwyn's words playfully prodded Arondir. “Dergar’s letting his fingers be moved, not learning a sequence.”

“But he had his hand where it should be.” Menrien came closer, staring at the baby's hands now waving aimlessly. 

“Arondir was looking down. Babes his age are getting very good at watching faces. It will be a while yet before he can learn a pattern on his own.” Bronwyn had sympathy for Heradis. She was balling her fists with irritation, defensive of her little brother’s skills.

“He does have a very sharp mind. You two have been good models for him.” Bronwyn tried to ease the protective children. She straightened, stealing Dergar who was eager for another adult's attention.

Heradis welcomed the healer, going through the familiar pattern of niceties. Their friendship might yet be mended. Bronwyn carefully avoided looking at Meilyr. Arondir kept his distance, adopting a  polite submissiveness as the guest. Still, it wasn’t quite as tense as Theo feared. Save the caged animal pacing behind Meilyr’s eyes.

Theo started to see a pattern emerging. Meilyr had a habit of tapping a rhythm against his legs, arms, or any contact point. It looked like some of the calming methods he had heard about. Was he taming his anxiety? Theo had hoped Meilyr had found a way to conquer the family of feelings Theo thought they might share.  

Sitting down at the table, Menrin and Heradis had a million and five questions. Heradis begged until Arondir told her again about Captain Galadriel and asked about other women warriors. Mindful of Meilyr’s discomfort, Arondir tried to divert the young girl's attention. He casually mentioned that the Commander had many talents. Galadriel had once studied with one of the greatest creators and healers known to elven kind, a Maia. Then he spoke of the great smith's wife Nerdanel who was a renowned craftswoman herself. He withheld the fate of Aredhel, but boasted of her reputation as a huntress and bow woman.

“I am told, among those that Lady Galadriel is gathering, that there is an elf maiden that has mastered the bow in ways considered new art itself. Rían is her common name.” Arondir couldn’t entirely deny her genuine thirst. 

“Heradis. Menrin.” Bronwyn tried to take the pressure off Arondir. Her smile silently thanked him for his efforts to please the children and their hosts. 

“You both saw all sorts of horrible things coming from home to Pelargir. Looking up to the people who have fought off them off is understandable.” Heragel started to capture the thread of Bronwyn’s idea. Meilyr wasn’t so certain. From where he sat, Theo saw Heragel slipping her hand over the fist Meilyr was resting on his knee.

“You should be careful not to get lost in tales of glory. Violence wounds even the victorious. Fight only to protect and defend. Never for conquest.”

“Menrin. Heradis.” Meilyr spoke through gritted teeth “All this chatter, the uniforms, even the headquarters I’ve been assigned to- that is the tale. It’s meant to make others forget that battle brings death with it.”

“Meilyr!” Heragel gasped. Her husband raised her hand to silence her.

“If you think they’re old enough to throw a blade in their hands, then I say they’re old enough to hear the truth of things. They’ll see it soon enough. Stars know I wish it weren’t so.” He mumbled. “War is brutal enough, let alone when it’s just men. Now we’ve got all sorts dragging us into their squabbling. They might enjoy hacking at each other. What has it ever done for us other than ask for our land and blood?” 

“Arondir hates being a soldier.” Theo spat out his bubbling fury. It diffused Meilyr’s rant. Each tried to measure the intent of both statements.

“He might not like killing things, but he’s a really good fighter.” Menrin was skeptical about the overarching cynicism. Heradis was torn. “You have to really love something to put in that much time training.”

“Elven kind learn the ways of war because for most of our years among these lands we have known little else. I was as young as you, by my people, when shadows consumed all. It hollowed me. I tried to return to my passion, the earth, and heal my spirit. It was not to be. We were told the threat remained. They sent me back into the fray, to my post in the Southlands.“

“Our spirits may eventually return if our bodies are felled, but there is still loss. I am the last of those who shared my assignment. I watched my commander and one I might consider a friend leave for Mandos’ halls in unspeakable ways.”

Bronwyn,, at Arondir’s side, leaned to rest her forehead against his temple. Blindly his fingers searched for her own as he closed his eyes in remembrance. The stirred memories making him flinch. Arondir turned his head, foreheads meeting and noses brushing. He pulled her support into him. Theo had not seen them so close even in the privacy of home. 

““I nearly lost much more.” Theo, sitting between Arondir and Heragel, was the only one close enough to hear the whisper. Arondir righted himself, reaching out to grasp Theo’s shoulder. The bite Theo had been chewing went down hard as he realized Arondir included him in what he was grateful to retain.

“Well!” Heragel pushed back her chair with a loud scrape. The gloom settled in the room shattered with her forced cheer. “Bronwyn, I'd say it's time we had your treat, yes?”

“ Meilyr can you put Dergar down for me while the tea boils? He's half out as it is.” Heradis was quick to her feet. She cleared the bowls from the table unprompted. Nanu, settled by Arondir’s feet at the table, hoisted himself to his paws. Heragel chuckled and placed the scraps from preparation collected at the edge of the counter down by her feet. The dog scrambled to his reward the moment his name was called, nails clattering on the wood. 

Theo jumped to his feet, pressing his hand down on his mother’s shoulder when she went to help the other girls. She still had a long night ahead. Bronwyn began to protest before closing her mouth, and lifting his hand to kiss the top of it to accepting the kindness.

Theo grabbed the small honeyed breads and the currant jam Bronwyn had come with. Over the snack, Theo kept his promise and rehashed  the story of the Uruk invasion that had started this entire nightmare for his family. He focused on the captivated stares of the younger two. It was strange how the dramatization made it feel more like myth than memory. 

“Father?” Menrin stirred some of the jam at the side of his bowl. “You said you left Hordern a couple years before you met Mother.”

“About, yes.” Meilyr rose to trade his tea for ale. “After your grandmother passed.”

“It took me two years to find my love and near as long to court her.” He placed his hand on Heragel's lower back as he passed her at the scrub pot where she was wiping back out her own bowl. He tenderly kissed her cheek, pressing firm knuckles into the tension she held down  there as earnestly as she dealt with the dishes.

“So...about sixteen years. Or better.” Dergar figured in his mind. Bronwyn’s stiffened posture gave Theo an idea of where Menrin’s thoughts may be going. 

“Oh something like that.” Meilyr tried to sound unconcerned. The shared look of concern between husband and wife was not so well concealed.

“Then... you must have met Theo's dad!” Heradis beamed, beating Menrin to the observation. “Were you at their wedding? You said Hodern was smaller than our village. Did you know him well? Had he died before you left?”

“HERADIS.” Menrin hissed, elbowing his sister. “What are you, four? You don't ask things like that!”

“O...oh...I.” the girl demurred, shrinking, and bowing her head towards Theo’s mother. “I'm sorry Lady Bronwyn.Father doesn't tell us much about when he grew up. I...I shouldn't make light of your loss. Or yours, Theo. I didn’t mean to.”

“Oh darling.” Bronwyn left her seat to hug the girl. “You've only voiced what many have wondered. Never be ashamed of well meaning curiosity.”

“I don't think Meilyr would recognize the boy I was with. Both left before I knew of the blessing l was carrying.” She paused, careful with words. “I never knew the fate of either.”

“Father said your husband died.” Menrin looked sharply at Meilyr.

“He misled you for the sake of my dignity. I was not wed. You're old enough to have seen that many would not take kindly to knowing I had a child without being bound.” Bronwyn petitioned, still rubbing Heradis' back. 

“I would not encourage others to follow my choices. Not for shame. For how hard of a life it is to raise someone mostly on your own.” Bronwyn blazed in her conviction. ”How could anyone think I should be humiliated for bringing him into this world?”

“Theo amazes me each day. I am proud of my boy. I am honored to be his mother. I have so much to thank him for.” She turned her smile inward.

“I dare say he is also the reason I was able to keep this one here at my side.” Bronwyn reached again for Arondir. The elf's lips curled up as he swallowed Bronwyn’s smaller fingers with his own. “I'm not certain I'd be any more than someone he had to watch out for had Theo not charmed him from the start.”

“Lies. All lies.” Theo snorted, flustered by the praise and affection. “I'm the brat he put up with because he wanted to stay near her. He just got stuck with me.”

“Theo.” Arondir's voice, firm and louder than any thought him capable, caused most to lurch. Desperation and sorrow lined his face. Instantly Theo regretted his lack of forethought. There was pain when he started to speak again.“Always-”

“He did not mean---” Bronwyn blurted. 

“It is a humanism, Arondir.” Meilyr quickly explained. He couldn't manage to be entirely comfortable under the elf's eyes. “It’s clear when Theo speaks of you he knows that you care for him.”

Arondir went silent. He shared Heradis\ tendency to retreat when faced with misunderstanding. The room grew warm with tension once more. Taking a gulp of air, Theo tried to undo some of his damage.

“If I was burdensome-” Theo stood to direct his entire to Arondir. “I was luckier than I thought. Still am. I lost count of the times you've saved me and mother somewhere around twelve.You turned your back on your entire race to be with us. “

“You helped get Heradis and Menrin back. Oh, and Vaelah. Once she's really a healer hundreds of more people will be still be alive because you helped her. You taught so many to trap and hunt when we escorted them to the city. Arondir… We don’t deserve your kindness. Not after the way the Southlanders treated you. “

“Of course Arondir cares about you, Theo.” Heradis shot the three of them a look, irritated. “But you're NOT what caught his eyes! Bronwyn is as pretty as any elf-maid, I bet.” The compliment made all but Arondir and Meilyr laugh.

“Thank you, Heradis.” Bronwyn stuttered, turning pink.

“It is kind of weird that you were friends, Papa.” Menrin avoided the drama by tempting Nanu into tug of war. Theo joined in thinking maybe the two of them would be a better challenge for the mini horse of a dog. “She's so much younger than you...isn't she?”

“It's just the sun your father gets, I think.” Heragel patted her husband's arm affectionately as his pride was pricked. “Or the stress of having to tame you little stumps.”

“Don't blame your ol' father just because he's not the one with Numenorean blood in him! Not all of us can age as gracefully as Bronwyn.” He huffed.

“Wait, Numenor?” Theo dropped his end of the rope toy the same moment the dog tugged. Menrin yelled indignities as he stumbled forward. Bronwyn suddenly was very busy wiping down the table. “I thought you said Grandda came from around here. It's why you knew so much about Pelargir.”

“That what she told you? Not really a fib, I suppose.” Meilyr mused as he put things away in one of the cupboards. “You should go take a dig into those fancy records.”

“Mother?” Once again Bronwyn was set to be the center of attention. She soothed down her dress as she collected her thoughts.

“I didn’t lie just…did not speak the entire truth.” she clasped her hands at her side. “I was a child the last time my father spoke of this. Bear with me.”

“My grandfather did come to the Southlands from this coast. He migrated here with the help of distanct cousins who were among the founders” Bronwyn’s jaw was tight as she tried to remain polite in her explanation.

“Migrated? From where?”

“Well, Numenor.” She shrugged. The statement seemed to surprise Arondir in some manner.

“My grandfather was one of the Faithful. He saw that things were becoming... inhospitable. So he revoked his birthright to reside in a place founded by minds he hoped hadn't changed so severely. It was his grandfather, I believe, that knew the founders personally. Those generations before me, some seeing centuries, waited until quite late in life to start their families.” She edged in how so few generations could span the timeline of these events.

“That's AMAZING! That must be why Theo fits in so well with people from here!” Menrin was once again stuck in his idolization.

“Why...why wouldn't you tell me that?” It was a simple thing. Somehow in light of all the changes to Theo’s life, this felt much larger. “Is that why you never talked about grandda's family?”

“I suppose it was.” Bronwyn sighed, hugging herself. 

Once when she was young she saw her father mumbling words as he ran his hands over an old relic from his own father. Years later she gained the courage to ask him about it. He told her it was just a token. Her grandfather would speak to it in times of worry, thanks, or in need of courage. The habit had become ingrained in him as reflex. 

“ I gleaned a little of the Valar over the bits and pieces my fathe unconsciously mentioned. Arondir introduced me to the lady Yavanna’s role and the rest of those of her kind. I know now the charm was symbolic of Orome the hunter. It’s strange to me why they’d appeal to him. They didn’t have that kind of fire in their blood. Perhaps Orome saw them journeying to be among those who had fallen under Morgoth’s shadow once as battling the remnants rather than fleeing the strife of the island.” 

 “Theo, Your grandda didn't care to talk about his past. He didn't have it easy growing up. You know how humans felt about elves and elven culture. If your great-grandmother wasn't supporting her parents and siblings they would have stayed in Pelargir. But he loved her. So he followed her to her homeland and kept his devotions private. “

“Your Grandda thought he was protecting me from exclusion. And, well---” her eyes sheepishly flickered between her son and the elf. “You already had enough to handle having me as a mother. I didn't see how knowing all of this would ease your burdens.”

Heat crawled up in Theo, clawing into his shoulder blades. With gritted teeth he breathed in deeply through his nose. trying not to let it take over. Wasn’t it bad enough she never spoke of Meilyr? The part of his brain that lay beneath the anger saw the sense. The rest of him wasn't buying it at the moment.

“You should have told me.” Theo could feel Meilyr's and Heragel's staring. 

 “Yes. I should have.” Bronwyn nodded. “I had to make a lot of choices for us, Theo. At the time I thought it was best. I make mistakes. This is one of them. I'm sorry.”

“Bronwyn?” Heradis' voice was little more than a whisper. Heragel shook her head at the girl. “Does this mean you and Theo are going to live as long as the islanders do?”

His mother did look significantly younger than Meilyr. Theo had noted it before. He thought it was as Heragel had jested, a product of Meilyr’s career. Knowing now what he did, this could change everything . For the briefest moment he forgot his irritation and felt a spark of hope.  Maybe he hadn't taken so much of his mother's happiness awa. Not if this meant she could have more years with Arondir. Assuming the war didn't swallow all of them.

“No.” Bronwyn's shoulders relaxed a little. “It is one thing I dared ask my mother. Father had warned her when they wed that there could be differences between them.” A smile tickled her lips. “Mother’s stubbornness in that matter when it came to her heart seems to be my inheritance.”  

“My grandfather saw just shy of three centuries.Going by the families of those who had left Numenor before him,  he guessed each generation would only have half of the previous. I’ve only bit of that blood in me.”

“But... we still might have a little longer?” Theo got lost in a cloud of emotions.

“I suppose I may have longer than most elders. I've not aged that much more slowly than those of middle earth.” Bronwyn hesitated. 

“The lag may not have fully set in. Elven kin reach their full height in their fiftieth year. Only after this coming of age do we cease to mirror your cycle.” Arondir puzzled out loud. “Doriath had not yet fallen when I reached my majority. I do not how much I have since changed. Commander Elendil's years would be closer comparison.”

“We are not the Commander,” Bronwyn twisted her head in Arondir’s direction but could not meet his eyes. It was a struggle for her not to let them plant false aspirations. Instead she focused again on her son.

“Theo, I hope with all that I am you will see the days of your great-great grandchildren. I would not count on having more time than the men around us. Above all else, I wish my days to come to an end long before yours. As any parent would.” She pleaded with her entire body. Theo was just simply exhausted.

“There's no way Theo's seeing grandchildren.” Menrin casually chimed in, ignoring the gravity of the conversation. “He'd have to be able to convince someone to marry him first. He doesn't even notice girls.”

“HEY!” Theo became indignant. His face flushed from a very different heat than his anger. Heradis snickered at her brother's injection. “ I... I notice them. I just.. I have more important things to focus on. I don’t see the sense of it all when I don’t have the time they deserve. Girls get enough of that from other soldiers.”

“Suuuuure.” Menrin's grin taunted him. Theo mockingly growled as he lunged. He put Menrin into a headlock of revenge that brought as many laughs as protests.

“Oh I've no doubt Theo could have his choice.” Heragel smirked, shifting her weight onto one hip with gleaming eyes. "Wouldn't you agree Bronwyn? That a few might come to mind.”

“What?” Theo froze long enough for Menrin to elbow him slightly too hard. He gasped, letting his arm lose enough for the younger boy to scramble free.

“Ooooh no you don't!” Heragel pointed towards the streets. “Rough it up out there, thank you.”

Theo tried not to be indignant at being lumped in with the behavior of someone much younger. Even if it was to appease and entertain. With an exaggerated slump his took his siblings into the early hours of the night to help them burn off their energy. Nanu, having passed out after his snack, huffed out a sound akin to a groan and dutifully scurried after the children to guard them.

~*~*~*~*~

The front door's latch slipping into place sounded like the barring of a barricade. With the children out of the room and the youngest sleeping, the four adults were left secluded. Bronwyn's mouth went dry. The surge of adrenaline and nerves that had overcome her when she addressed her lineage had faded. She was shaky. Ever watchful, she felt Arondir's palm press against the back of her shoulder. Had she stumbled? Heragel seemed concerned.

“I'm just tired. Might I trouble you for one more mug of tea before I return?” Her pride won out over the urge to run away from the discomfort of unearthed secrets.  

“Of course! Please, be at ease.” It was a well meaning but impossible request.

“I …I owe you thanks, Bronwyn. I did not mean to have you lie.” Meilyr scratched compulsively at his short beard. He would not avoid her gaze regardless of his own stress. It made Bronwyn feel a small, buried, part of her fear. 

Meilyr had always had a large presence. It could be intimidating or coercive. Sly and charming. Bronwyn might earnestly believe Meilyr was once again more like the man she’d cared for. It was not enough to erase the boy twisted by his madness that had left her. The unpredictability of his moods made her understand the shattered nerves of some wives driven to their cups to cope with the master of the house.

“I...I said no lie.” Bronwyn despised the wavering in her voice. “The man you were when  you left Hordern was not someone we had ever known.” 

“ I do not wish to twist words again.” Bronwyn regained some of her confidence. “Meilyr, it is for you and Heragel to decide. But if Theo continues to stay, I see no good in holding the truth from the children. They are already attached to Theo. You gave him a chance to see how he feels about being here. They deserve the same. Accepting a guest and a potential part of your household are different things.”

“She's right.” Heragel agreed, jolting Bronwyn as she  sat across from her and reached for her hand. Heragel made it clear from the first day her priority was her family. Bronwyn had not anticipated she’d concur with something that had potential for discord.

“The children’s response. It's not just a matter of your household. If you want Theo as a part of your family, my door will always be open to your children. It doesn’t sit right that we’re putting the weight of changing Menrin and Heragel’s world onto Theo’s shoulders.” 

 “I never said he should be the one--” Meilyt’s jaw tightened before he stopped and took a deep breath through his nose. “I said that I wouldn't speak to them until Theo decided he was ready for them to know.”

“You may not be given a choice.” Arondir's had refrained from contributing.The elf likely didn’t feel he deserved a voice here. “Farthon is not the only one to notice similarities between you and Theo. Menrin is smart. Heradis has a sharp eye, curious.”

“Circumstantial!” Meilyr bristled.

“Dearest.” Heragel shook her head. “I've…been made aware of…that is, some are saying I am responsible for not accepting a child that should be a part of this house.”

“What?” Meilyr’s defensiveness turned to distress. Bronwyn sympathized with both. The times your choices reflected on the ones you love in unintended ways always muddied the heart. “When? Who?”

“It doesn't matter. I said it was a regional resemblance to where you and Bronwyn were from. That will only hold so long if Theo continues working at your side.”

“What would you have me do? Tell me any of you want that boy to be forced into a role he doesn't want? He is my blood. I promised him he could have the choice of being a son or brother! How can I go back on my word now? Have I already not made enough mistakes?” Meilyr spread open his arms in bafflement.

“Bronwyn. I will never be able to apologize enough for how things ended between us. I...I was ill. When I came back to myself I hoped if I did not return you could forget the terror I was and move on. I do not want to be the monster of his story.” Meilyr's voice hitched up in frustration.

“Papa?” Heradis stood in the doorway. Nanu poked his head under her arm, giving her his weight to lean in. “Why were you a terror? How did you hurt Bronwyn?”

Bronwyn's pulse thudded into her ears. The rush of dread was nothing like what the child's parents must be experiencing. Theo was desperately trying to distract them. Meilyr had the wind knocked out of his sails. If the person he had left Bronwyn as was made from liquid fire, he had now solidified into stone. With straightened shoulders, Bronwyn set to doing what was her mission this evening.

“He didn't hurt me darling.” Bronwyn sat down her mug on the table. Going to the door, she ushered the children and dog back into the house. Nanu didn’t trail after them. He lingered so that Bronwyn could weave her fingers into the fur behind his ear. His face laid against her hip.

“You see... Your father once courted me. It ended when your grandmother became truly ill. Your father's heart was too heavy to stay in Hordern after she passed. He left the village to heal. Sick as he was, your father was worried about me. He thought as her pupil I'd feel obligated to see after your Grandfather in his absence.” She had slowly approached the girl, reaching out to play with her hair tenderly.

“Your father has a big heart.” Bronwyn hoped her smile didn’t look as weary as she was. “I think he's worried that Theo would blame him somehow. That perhaps I had a hard time loving after he left. That he caused me to make the choices I did that led to my life with Theo in Tirharad.” 

“I don't.” Theo squeaked awkwardly, playing into the narrative. “Blame you. For all that.”

“You know it's more than that.” Meilyr's words could have been directed at either of them. Heh could not, or would not, choke out the truth to his children that she was avoiding. 

“I have this anger thing.” Theo raised his chin. Bronwyn suspected he was scrambling to explain for Meilyr himself.

“Mother must have told him. It's kind of similar to how he felt when he left Hordern. You father told me the other day that if he had been around, he would have been able to teach me howd to control it sooner.” 

“No, Theo...” Meilyr sighed. Heragel placed her hand between his shoulders supportively. “Heradis. Menrin. There's...something we've not told you yet. But it's time.”

“Dergar isn't going to be the youngest in this house.” His wife jumped into the conversation. The children’s necks were getting whiplash from this landslide of information.

“ You both remember the...accident that happened before your little brother. We told you too soon that time. I didn't want you to worry it might happen again. Now with all the changes and the move coming up-- we're going to have to ask you both to do a bit more than I would like. Just to be safe.” 

Heradis lit up at her mother’s news, rushing to hug her. She merely flittered there before switching to hug her father’s waist as well. Menrin was overwhelmed. Meilyr put a firm hand on his daughter’s head with the other on Menrin’s shoulder.

“I...I know I've spent a lot of time with Theo these days. He never had me....someone like me... growing up. I was afraid he would think when this assignment ended, with you three and now this new little one, I might abandon him. He's had too many people let him down.”

“I've also had a lot who lifted me up.” Theo supplied. The two stared at one another, measuring where they stood. 

“Right, then!” Heragel hefted before the conversation could dip into digestion and yet more questions and stretching of the truth. “It's high time you two went to your beds. Bronwyn, I'm so sorry we've kept you so long. I hope it won't make your work more burdensome tonight. Theo, would you care for the remaining desert to take home? These two will just squabble over it to no end tomorrow otherwise.”

“Isn't tomorrow your last day with Papa?” Menrin didn't move far from Theo's side, more reluctant for him to go than mad at being ordered to sleep. “I thought you were staying here because it's closer.”

“Actually, I uh... I saw Farthon on the way.” Meilyr coughed as he answered.

 “Theo, you're being pulled back to the academy. You've done nothing wrong!” Meilyr was quick to assure him. “He said you were reassigned to a different sort of training based on performance feedback. It didn't sound like a demotion.”

“It is not.” Arondir held just a hint of a smile when he confirmed. A new surge of energy hit Menrin. He became a rush of questions, trying to pry out ‘official’ secrets. 

Heragel's sighed heartily. Bedtime would be delayed....again.

Chapter Text

Arondir refused to give Theo anything other than the official dispatch. Theo didn't waste energy trying for more. He was to be at the officer’s quarters at dawn. Odd, but not an unheard of.  Strange enough to encourage the endless buzzing of possibilities. What if everyone was wrong about this not being a punishment? What if there was more fallout from the incident with Emund? What it was determined he was to blame for Vaelah’s actions after all?

Or...What if his conduct had proven he was ready for second year drills? It was possible he was being sent to attend a ranked officer. Unlikely, as second years and above did so as a general matter. Theo would have been given more notice if he was being sent to the field. Someone would have definitely tipped off his mother. She hadn’t been more antsy than normal. 

Maybe Farthon saw him working with Meilyr and put in a petition for him to be moved from a soldier’s track to the engineers. Theo thought he heard rumors of something like that happening before. Would they give him a choice? Maybe they wanted to tell him early so he could withdraw from his usual morning curriculum.

Even with afternoons heating, mornings always had a bite to them. His skin prickled. Theo hadn’t dared layer heavily on the chance he wouldn't have a chance to change in the coming heat. He took to a jog to ward it off.

Half way to the keep he heard a voice call out to him. Crooking his head he caught Eberil picking up pace to match him. Trailing behind her was the outline of a girl who, when closer, Theo saw was Eberil's mirror image. Well, if that mirror didn't show the scars here and there. Or the traces of a broken nose. And if it didn’t have hair a length no soldier would dream of wearing. Eberil was laughing at something the other had said as she approached. Huh. So she really could let her guard down away from the others.

“Theo!” Eberil caught up. Her sister, breathing a little more heavily than the other two who hadn't really broken a sweat, gradually joined them. “Ya headin' in right early too?”

“Uh...ye...yes?” Theo blinked a few times, distracted by the girl who was so like his teammate and completely not. Lacking Eberil’s muscle build, the other girl's height made her lanky in the way of dancers or statuary models. She wore the standard colors of the scribes employed by the military but the make was from a higher quality cloth. She swept her coiled hair over her shoulder as the slowed to walk together. In the dim light Theo thought he could tell she had highlighted her cheeks. She seemed more suited to a lady's court and the company of Emund's kind than in the working class.

“Oi. You not seen twins ‘fore?” Eberil snorted. “Or ‘as ya bein’ stuck wit’ all th’ rest of th' boys made ya forget girls exist a t’all?”

“That's ridiculous, Eberil. You're in his unit. And that other lass!” her sister puffed out her irritation through her nose, stopping entirely. She then turned her grin on him. Her hands clutched onto her bag, hip swaying out just slightly. She liked to make an impression. “Ignore her. She's always sore when I’m around. Jealous she isn't the eldest. I'm Irileth.”

“Theo.” He twitched his fingers. He wasn’t sure how to properly greet someone who seemed to fit in many different societies. What he settled on made his unit mate snicker “Pleasure to meet you...Uh, miss.”

“Oh she'd like ta be one o' those pretty ladies who go ‘bout wit' their tea an' lace, I gather. Talks in th’ way all ’em seem to do. Bah. Naught’ special ‘bout a pair of weaver's chits. Am’ it were bare four ticks she rushed out ‘fore me.” Eberil’s words held little actual malice. Sibling squabbling. Theo had flashes of longing for it the more he watched Heradis and Menrin in their home.

“If I wanted all that fuss I would have stayed with mother and father. That’s more like how they pass their time.” Irileth countered. “Don't listen to her. I'm charmed to be called miss. Though I do hope I can contribute to more practical needs than such ladies are usually called to.”

“Yea' yea...Well if ya two keep on wit that eye thing, we're goin’ ta be late 'miss' .” Eberil started jogging again.  Her sister’s groan gave way to a sigh. 

“Are both of you headed to the officer's wing?” He asked, setting his pace to stay between the two. Theo didn’t want to make Irileth feel out of place not being able to keep up. She wasn’t military. She had no reason to have to.

“Aye. Your ‘miss’ ‘ere works in th’ dusty archives filin’ and sortin' all their ole papers an’ scurrying ‘bout.”

“For tide’s sake, Eberil! You don't need to lay on the dialect like that!” Irileth shouted ahead, managing to pull up closer to Theo. “ She's impossible. Yes our shop is closer to the outer districts, and I’ve nothing against common, but she absolutely delights in this act of hers! It only makes her path harder. “

“Those up th' hill thinkin’ folks down in th' low city ar’ rough an’ ragg'i'd. That most' us don' know how t' be speakin' let 'lone knowin' letters. An' 'mos 'em already be 'sposin' I'm 'alf a man. So I talks likes who's they hatin’. Shows 'em whats they wan’na see.” Eberil began jogging backwards. 

Abrubtly Eberil slowed, straightened, and turned on her heel as gracefully as any performer. She shifted to a prim walk. Eberil mocked the way her sister coquettishly tilted, making an effort at a demure smile. When she spoke it was while looking partially up at them through her eyelashes.

“Might you consider how a shift into what is accepted as the proper speech and mannerisms of the esteemed classes would disarm that very class? If such an extended fabrication is required to awaken them to the ignorance of their assumptions, so be it. It is of the utmost importance that such differences be set aside. All people must be respected for opposing resentments to be resolved. Only then might we unite in a true common objective and regain our autonomy from the evils that lay as heavily as gathering clouds over our beautiful lands and our hallowed sea.”

Theo stopped dead in his tracks. The shift took him completely off kilter. Eberil had to cover her cackle for fear of waking some residents up. Only the millers, bakers, and fishermen prepping for the morning tide were active. Irileth rolled her eyes, continuing straight past the both of them, clapping Theo hard between his shoulders.

“I uh, I'm not—It wasn't because.” Theo flushed. His drastic reaction put him too close to the same camp as those like Emund for his comfort.

“I can NOT picture you like that. Not what you said! The whole...” He batted his eyelashes, drawing clasped hands together near his heart dramatically. “Star of ladies’ socials and... No. Just no. Never do that again. It's not..it's not YOU. ”

“You wouldn't be able to pay her any amount to start circling the feminine areas of high society.” Irileth barked her own short laugh. “Mother gave up getting her into a dress by our sixth year.”

“Naw. Don't ya' be fussin'” Eberil slipped back into dialect, if a bit lighter. “You're one of th' good 'ens Theo. You don't keep those airs 'bout ya'. Ya’ understand th' only competin' we should be doin' is with our own goals. Rodthen was mighty than'ful for ya’ helpin' him the ot'er week. An' Elocar's had a yarn or two 'bout seein' ya with your mo'her. Dilgran brought ya’ up all sorts of times he and Ir’ been workin' toge'her. Tells me ya’ not just playin’ at sumfin like I’am.”

“Are you telling me you're an even better archer than you let on?” Theo pulled back his neck in mock surprise. “'You've got to let me see you face off with Arondir some time if so!”

His reaction mixed with praise made her grin from cheek to cheek. Irileth  berated them for bantering. Weren't they the ones who had been in a rush? The two soldiers glanced at one another. They broke out into a mad run. The impromptu race left them unable to hear Irileth's exasperation.

Theo would insist it was only Eberils longer limbs that gave her the edge. When she pointed out to him that she was barely a thumb shorter, he blurted it didn't mean their legs were the same. In front of them a teasing voice called out, asking just how much Theo had been staring at those legs. Elocar stood at the gate with Sorinil. Theo shrank as Eberil laughed, making her way over to Elocar. She greeted sorinil first with a pound to her chest with her fist, leaning to press her hand to his in the same motion in an armless hug. To Elocar she reached out to grab him closer. Their time in the armory cementing what seemed to be a strong friendship before. 

When Irileth caught up with them, a scowl reserved only for her sister hit them all. Theo offered her an apology. Irileth shook her head dismissively. She was used to spontaneous action from her sister. He admired the resigned smile as she asked him to pardon her temper. 

In the entry way, Dilgran stood at the bottom of the stairs leading to the barracks. His voice raised towards Gimaldor as he descended. Theo gravitated to his friend. Dilgran met him with a tight hand clasp simultaneously drawing him in for a hug. They'd barely seen one another since their special assignments. Seeing that Dilgran also called to this gathering lifted Theo's spirits. 

Gimaldor let out a roar of a yawn. He stretched up his arms and cranked his neck releasing a crack loud enough for Theo to hear as he reached the final steps. The boarder was already trying to reclaim his untamed hair back into its binding. Dilgran rolled his eyes. It was something Gilmador had to do frequently between drills. He refused to chop it down. 

The older boy was a ball of confidence. He threw himself into any challenge, would rally others, and be the first to make fun of his failures. Not being without skill, Theo would guess it was this nonchalance that would irritate the legacy cadets. They neglected to acknowledge that Gimaldor would be setting up to correct his errors even as he was laughing. He never made simple mistakes long. 

He also was one of the few able to do the engineers’ equations. Wedding between them, Gimaldor casually slung his arms cassually over Theo and Dilgran. The three makde a slope in line formation with their heights. Instead of a greeting, Theo got an almost angry earful from the older boy on the engineers passing him from the workshop onto the carpenters. 

“There’s more to design than numbers! You got to see things up here before you can make them!” He tapped his temple enthusiastically. Theo pulled his back, never having been this up close and personal with Gimaldor’s vibrancy.

“You look like I'm going to bite!” Gimaldor released him, pulling his arms across his chest and scowled. He released the expression gradually, chucking at Theo’s slack jawed stare.

“He were skiddish' likes tha' wit' us too.” Eberil tossed back a comment to the overheard conversation. While still occasionally conversing, Eberil kept her exchanges short. She had shifted back into her more serious persona. 

More joined the flock was joined in their migration by a few civilians and students from associated departments. By the time they turned into the keep’s right wing they looked like a grazing heard instead of a cluster of birts. Was there really need for secrecy if what felt like half his unit and just as many civilians had been summoned?

“What, is our blacksmith here the only one fit to speak to you?” Gimaldor's question bit, teetering between curiosity and offense.

“Scribe.” Irileth chimed a correction. She walked behind the others, happily arm and arm with two of her own friends.

“I've never heard anyone praised as quickly as him for his copy work.” Irileth lowered her eyes and shifted her chin in skepticism, sending one of her smirks in Dilgran's direction. “Should I be worried about my own position, sir?”

“No ma’am.” Dilgren was the only one in his usual calm, even, mood. Such a gentle personality from someone of his great size still caught Theo as strange from time to time. “Your work is enviable. Even if they’d convinced me to stay in the archives you'd nothing to worry about.”

“So?” Gimaldor poked Theo, not letting him off. “What's got you all twisted?”

“I ...I never knew all of you were... like this.” He gestured to how they had drifted to different clusters. The remained in orbit of each other, contributing to conversations held across the spattering. “Everyone goes their own way after training.”

“That's 'cause half ‘o’ us don't want ta’ end up wit’ the last slops in the dining hall. “ Sorinil shot him an incredulous look. “Not all us has time an' coin ta’ go off ‘n’ buy our meals or get home ‘n’  back ‘for noon block starts up .”

“Sorinil.” Eberil warned. The young man diverted his attention. It was strangely comforting to have at least one of them hesitant about his sudden inclusion.

“Met Dil’ here when I got my sword from his father. Got him to come spend time ‘round here when you were off doin' what ya' do. Guess Dil was too ashamed to tell his best mate about it.” The Numenorean transplant gave a pronounced pout. Dilgran shook his head slowly yet again.

“Elocar's mother patched me up some when I first got here.” Gimaldor directed with his head. “His mother knows yours what with them both being healers here and all. An' Elocar's mother is good friends with the twins’ aunt. So he knew those two a bit before they started here.”

“Couldn't ‘ford books an’ things.” Sorinil, blushing with shame, piped up before someone offered his story for him. “ Palthor and I went ‘n’ got—was-- taught the basic letterin’ and words from miss Irileth. She kept ‘er old workbooks. She...she's done a’lot for us. E' talked us in ta’ joining up with ‘er. ”

“Hush. You both practically taught yourself. All you needed were the tools. I was there when you were stuck, not much more.” Irileth tutted him.

“Mother traded for most of what we got. Only people who even took coin were those dealing with the outside. Most stayed inside the mountain range. She had to keep what little we were paid with for when she traveled at harvest and thaw to the market gathering.” Theo offered. It didn't seem right not to share something when they did. Theo hoped to wipe away some of the assumptions in Sorinil’s tone. “Still do. We live in the outer districts with the other newcomers.”

“Shouldn't a master healer be given residency here in the old city? She could be called at any time if we're attacked.” One of the girls at Irileth’s side asked. She wore the colors of the quartermaster’s pupils but held her posture and head as one who came from a more pampered class.

“Or the elf?  Don’t he get some sort’a  finery an’ all that ta’ put up wit’ us stinkin’ men?” Sorinil's voice had a hint of sourness. 

“Mother turned down one of the bedchambers here. I think Arondir only accepted them in case we had to force her to sleep. He only stays there when he has night duty.” Theo tried to be lighthearted about it. There was skepticism in the following silence. 

“Arondir…He’s not paid for this.” The murmers of disbelieve were unanimous. “He's here with blessings of his commanders. It makes him their responsibility. Elves just do the jobs that have to be done. ”

“He's takin' naught?” Eberil was still surprised. Theo shook his head.

“The army will give him provisions and the like. When this is all over he might be given a token or provided a service for compensation. They don’t have things like wages. They don’t think of wealth like we do.” As Theo  explained, he realized the real reason this wasn’t talked about at home. Some people would have strong opinions about Arondir if they thought he wasn’t contributing in traditional ways expected of an able bodied male. Race made no difference. The looks on a few faces confirmed it.

“He's kept food on a lot of tables of refugees. He’s taught people how to snare, plant better crops and home gardens. He forages for mother when her duty keeps her from collecting things with a short season and he passes things on his patrol. He’s never been a builder, but did almost all the patching on where we live now. That’s since leaving the Southlands. “ Dilgran clasped Theo’s shoulder to stop the boil of his defense.

“Oh! He's the one who went out to Terroun's place!” Irileth's other friend, rich tan skin splattered with freckles and darkened further by the sun, exclaimed. 

“Terroun’s a cousin of sorts. Everyone said he was best farmer around. Knows all there is. He was at his wits end thinkin’ he couldn’t do naught with his soil this year.” She explained to blank faces. “Now ‘e says his projected yield might be one of his best. Thanks to the person the guild sent. He didn't mention it was an elf. “

“Ha! See! We've got more ties than we all thought!” Gimaldor clapped. “Now that the net has been cast, Theo...welcome aboard.  If ya’ weren’t always runnin' off we would have nabbed ya’ sooner.” 

The gathering hall they entered splintered off into chambers at its edges. The chamber was filled with a multitude of faces in many styles of dress. In front of the stairwell that led up to the officers quarters stood Commander Tarazir. Obamie,l the lead healer on this shift, was at his right. Isildur stood attentively on his left. In the wings someone with the emblem of the merchant's guild examined a scroll. When Isildur spotted Theo he gave the slightest of nods. Tarazir was taking a mental tally of the collective, making one of the senior scribe apprentices superfluous.

“Vealah!” Dilgran was the one to spot her.

Her friend from the day before, Aidinas, was close by. The girls' dark frizzy hair was fighting its braid. Being nearly as tall as Theo, she towered over the younger healer. Vaelah'ds initial smile wilted quickly as she saw the group that surrounded her friends. Aidinas rolled her whole head to the side in exasperation before she dragged a shuffling Vaelah over. 

“Vaelah...Vae...oh! I remember now! I heard you had a hand in getting Rodthen through his week with the healers. We are in your acquaintances' debt, m'ladies.” Gimaldor grinned at the girls. Like Irileth, if Eberil’s assessment of her sister was to be believed, the roguish cadet seemed to also have the knack for charming everyone. Except maybe Aidinas if her scowl was any indication. 

“He's a quick study. Just pushed around too much. Has trouble thinking well of himself.” Aidinas was frank, blunt. She had no time for antics. The rebuff made Gimaldor's eyebrows shoot up. He withdrew, palms up in surrender.

“Hey now! Only repeatin’ what he told me!” Vaelah's friend withdrew her attack reluctantly.

“Gimaldor's not the one Rothen ever had to worry about.” Theo supplied. If this lanky girl was a good friend, he hoped she'd take the word of someone Vaelah seemed to trust.

“He's got a good nature. It's why the horses take to him.” Gimaldor rushed, wanting to ensure Aidinas knew he was on Rodthen’s side. “He would have been swiped up by his way with them by cavalry back home in a snap !”

The second year healer appraised Gimaldor's words. Aidinas examined Theo then the rest of the group. Whatever she saw seemed to satisfy her. She gave a short nod. 

“She’s lived here a few years already. Before the disruption. She’s started her training before they restructured.” Vaelah introduced her hawk-eyed friend to the group.  

“Don’t let her bark scare you. She’s helped so many of us first year students at study sessions. ” Vaelah's reprimand startled and sting her friend. Aidinas flinched and seemed to shrink a hair. “ She’s just cautious. And protective.”

“A smart thing to be.” Gimaldor nodded, keeping his eyes locked on Aidinas. The two seemed matched in a battle of will. Theo sensed it was more pride than animosity that kept them bristling.

A loud slap of Tarazir’s palms cut of all chatter. Late stragglers were quick to rush to the back of the crowd. Cadets stood at attention. The mistress healer stood calmly with her hands folded in front of her. Isildur kept his own behind his back, chin up as stared blankly forward.

“Each of you gathered here today have been selected for displaying talent, dignity, or dedication to the paths you've chosen. A few of you exemplify all three.” Tarazi’s voice boomed across the hall even with the mess of bodies dampening the acoustics.  “Most of you are within your first year. Some of you longer. In that time we have tried to provide you with core essentials to go forward.”

“The difference between theory and practice is vast. Today, you will engage in a practical exercise.” Those who required exams to proceed in their ranks and those who dreamed of officer colors started to hum. Civilians stood silent with their confusion.  Tarazir repeated his clap to reorient them.

“This is not an exam of any sort- military or certification. It will, however, assess your progress and readiness for that next step. Those subject to such assessments have an opportunity to start those tests with additional points. Should you excessively fail to meet expectations, you may begin that test with a deficit.” 

Theo's heart pounded in his chest. He hadn't been doing drills. He hadn't been reviewing position tactics. His work with Meilyr left him even more tired than training. A few weeks wouldn't make him forget the lessons spent the last year engraving into his body and mind. Knowing this logically did not stop the flood of panic about his preparedness.

Tarazir proceeded to call out names. The crowd was split into three groupings of mixed company. Each had a nearly even mix of civilian support, military, and guild apprentices from the city presumably attached to occasional contracts. 

Theo was joined by his two newest acquaintances, Irileth and Aidinas. Elocar was the last attached to his group. Dilgran and Vaelah were sent to the second along with Eberil, Gimaldor, and Irileth's friend who knew of the farmer, Libeth. He had hoped to have the two he knew best by his side to tackle this sudden challenge. They seemed to share his disappointment. 

Firpol and Emund, of course they'd be selected, were content in their placement together in the third. Theo cringed in sympathy when Sorinil was sent to join the same group. At least he had another of their unit, one of the boys who Theo had built the bench with and left a good impression, at his side. Maybe that would be enough to dissuade the two wealthy sons of the city from being too aggressive. Theo didn't have high hopes.

“Half of you here are of the united defense force. You have sworn yourself to the protection of this land and its people against danger in all its forms.” Isildur didn't have quite the same presence as Tarazir. His prestige that extended beyond those of the fortress gave him that extra little push to capture the crowd's attention.

“Fighting, building a strong defense, is not the only duties you will be called upon to do. A city, a military, a land, cannot function without the collaboration of all its peoples. To those I greet this morning who do not wield weapons but tools of trade, craft, and mind-- without your services we cannot function. We cannot fulfill our pledge to you.” isildur's confidence grew as he continued.

“Cadets, at time you may be required to do tasks you feel are beneath you.” Theo wasn't entirely sure he had imagined Tarazir turning slightly towards the third group where Emund and Firpol had been sent as the younger man spoke. 

“Your duty includes protecting all that is of the best interest to the alliance. You must work with those who provide for us. Let your training compliment each other’s.” Obamiel chimed in, her voice was warm and slightly cracked with age. Even as she projected to the best of her ability, the statement was hard for those in the back to hear. “At some point you are likely to be charged with seeing that assets -human, animal, material- complete their transit and arrive where they are needed.”

“Those set against us have recruited more humankind. By now you've heard of the NOrthern encounters and difficulties in addition to those in the direction of the dark one's domain.” Tarazir continued,  confirming gossip. Some of the civilians became agitated.  Tarazir raised his hand, pressing it towards the ground palm down in a motion of calm. “There are no signs of immediate danger to the city. Our best action is to continue training—and to prepare.”

“The land itself is the most vital resource to consider in both defense and count attack. Knowing the terrain and what you may harvest from it is often vital to success. Today, each group will be sent in different directions into the forest at our north-west.” 

“Priority one. Familiarize. Note the geography. Pass extensive details onto your cartographer. Anything that can be made of use-- what you choose to record is part of the assessment.” That explained the number of scribes. Theo thought of Dilgran's confession about his project for his mother. He had to be giddy over this.

“Priority two. Collaborate with the talents within your unit to project the uses of any resources in the area. You may collect more than a sample size but will be responsible for transporting what you take.”

“Priority three. Be aware of tactical factors. If you see a potential disadvantage in the terrain or can suggest how to turn it to a benefit- present your idea to the engineers. Or, if able, resolve the issue with your team.”

“In addition to materials for recording and gathering, each unit will be provided with one meal provision, rope, flint, and cloaks.” For the first time the guild master spoke up. 

“Should you determine camping overnight necessary to complete a task, you must send at least one representative to report before sun fall.” Isildur started to wrap up the details. “ They will not be permitted to return to the team. At no time are you to work individually. If you must break into smaller factions, no less than three. Five come nightfall.”

“Each cadet will be allotted ten arrows. Hunting and foraging is encouraged. Any excess game still of any use must be returned to the city. You might want to consider just how far through dense terrain you'll have to lug a caucus before you use up those arrows on a stray buck. ” There was a collective chuckling at Isilur's effort to lighten the mood.

Assignment set, the groups were sent to the dormitory dining hall for a droll basic breakfast before departing. It was an opportunity to discuss tactics and get to know each other’s strengths and personalities before they were reliant on working together. It would make for a more efficient start. 

Among Theo’s team there were two sons of one of the largest farmers in the area. Halmor was the elder to Hirador. One of the quartermaster's proteges, Lolach, a kitchen hand from the keep's pantries, Marien,  two second year cadets, Celdor and Turcil,  and an engineering apprentice, Dathin completed their unit.  Save for the farmers' boys who were used to living closer to the wild, the civilians seemed unsettled. The assigned route skimmed away from the direction of the sea into the densest part of the wood to be explored. 

Casually, Lolach created the power structure. He nominated Celdor for command. Turcil, being the other second year, was put forward by Aidinas as his second in command with no objections.

As they started to filter towards the outside, Dilgran stole a few moments back over to Theo. As predicted he was practically hopping. His group would run the boundary of the first at the east. Their portion was partially forested, crossing over into a large field that split to halves of the treegrowth. The third team after them had the most dangerous and possibly boring trek. The majority of their trajectory covered the open space of the field with only the fringes of trees on the other side.

Theo's eyes drifted from his friend as Dilgran started outlining his personal goals.  Eberil had intercepted Irileth who lost a touch of her charisma with doubt. Behind the girls Theo saw Vaelah pull away from Aidinas. The two looked unhappy with the exchange. Theo placed his hand on Dilgran’s chest to pause him before trying to shoulder his way to her before she escaped the hall. 

“Vae!” His voice was dampened by the bodies around him. Vaelah stopped but mumbled that her group was heading out.

“They need Dilgran to leave too.” Theo pointed out. Vaelah fidgeted, eyes darting away from him. Theo frowned. This was not the girl that had been on the beach with him. “Look, I uh...I  never got to thank you.”

“Or say sorry. For what you had to do. Because of me. If I, uh, scared you with...all the stuff I said.” Theo lowered his own voice now, afraid that somehow others would intuit his shame over confessing the way his emotions stormed from time to time.

“No!” The strength of Vaelah’s rejection made him flinch in surprise. Briefly she looked up to meet his eyes. “I…I thought that maybe... you were disappointed. In me. I didn’t act like the kind of person your mother told you I was. I...I let her down.”

“Storms! How did you do that?’ His face scrunched up.

“I... I lied. Stole. Sort of.” She said through gritted teeth.

“Vaelah.” He reached out and clasp above her elbow. “I can’t exactly be mad when it was for my sake. Mother? She's not mad. I promise. She can't say that, being an instructor and all. I think she was impressed that you two were able to brew it up. Even if it…stretched what was allowed.”

“The other matrons don’t see it way.” She sighed, limbs heavy.

“I don't know how your order works. I can't say they don't.” Theo shrugged, letting his hand fall. “If you ask me? Figuring out how to work around a rule means you're observant. Maybe they need to rethink the wording of their laws.”

His praise drew out just a slight smile. She straightened her posture just so. Her muttered thanks was followed with a puzzled look. Vaelah parted her lips to say something only to be interrupted by her group leader calling to her and Dilgran. She sighed as she craned her neck towards her unit.

“Good luck out there. Don't worry. Aidinas will keep you all patched up.” Vaelah settled.

“I'd ask you to make sure Dilgran doesn't wander off too far. But if he's working on his side project for mother while he's at it, you’ll probably get dragged along willingly.” Theo grinned, finally able to unlock the smirk he was used to seeing on her.

“Don't worry, Theo.” Gimaldor came out of nowhere and pat him solidly on the back. “I can keep a leash on them. They’d need a team of three, remember?”

“Tch. From the way I've seen your eyes roaming over some of our teammates already, I'm not sure we're the one's who's going to need to be collared.” Vaelah huffed.

With a cock of her head that bossy, tiny framed, spitfire flared back to life. Vaelah’s braid bounced over her shoulder as she trailed off. Gimaldor stomped at a clip after her, pleading his defense. 

Theo swallowed his jealousy from the split between himself and his friends. He’d have to be content with the stories they’d come back with. It wasn’t the time. Now, he had to seize this chance to prove he wasn’t just some legacy like Emund. 

Chapter Text

Theo and his team cleared the city just before the morning markets flooded. Irileth, attuned to social coordination, facilitated familiarizing the team with one another by asking about possible goals and how familiar each was with the area. The farmer's boys hadn’t been in the forest extensively. Their grandfather and his sisters had many stories of lurking in it as children. The brothers had been far in enough to know that the path their team was set on had a gradual incline. The inward trek would be rougher going, but an easier return at the end of the day. 

Next they tallied the provided supplies. There were enough sacks to carry half the team's weight back. or, it could be combined with netting and used like rope. Irelith and Lolach were given slate stones and chalk for drafting, ink, and two bound scrolls of the new paper inspired by an elven technique the engineers had been tinkering with. 

Celdor’s first order as leader was that the two record keepers to save marking for when they had to stop to gather samples. It would keep them moving as much as possible. Immediately collaborating, Lolach offered to note found quantities. Begrudgingly he admitted Irileth should be the one to attempt any illustrations of things too cumbersome to retrieve samples of and draft maps with the scouts. He had seen she had more drawing talent in their shared courses.  In turn, she asked for assistance in the descriptions of land and unkown harvested material. She had noticed his way with words in his cataloging and fine eye for detail. 

Celdor recruited Elocar to join him as the other primary lookout. Hirador, the younger farmer,  would help Marien in identifying any sneaky food sources. Meanwhile, Aidinas would be keeping an eye out for growth with medicinal l uses. Halmor, the elder brother, the other cadet Turcil, and Theo would scout ahead. With the farmer’s sense of land and Theo’s practical experience from his migration journey, they’d attempt  to map out geographical features. Dathin, the engineering apprentice, had been in the engineering workshop during Theo's test. He asked for Theo’s help spotting weak defensive areas based on the memory. 

Their spirits rose as the morning dew evaporated away. A pike marked their entry point. All minds turned to the business at hand. 

Even under the shade of the treetops, they started to feel the heat by midday. The damp sheen on their skin from earlier fog traded for one of sweat. The farmer's boys and engineer tried to gauge the sloping while they walked it. Marien suspected there might be mushrooms and berries that had been scarce since the trail to the mountains became a greater risk to travel. 

Marien found her treasures as they found a spot to stop for a moment and make initial recordings. Suddenly Irileth let out a yelp. Lolach groaned in tandem. Tall grasses had masked a patch of burdock they had both leaned into. Sympathetically, Aidinas and Marien stopped their work to help the two divest themselves of the burrs. They tried to spin the accident into a lucky find. The prickly growths were undoubtedly a pain for obvious reasons. But the spring roots were a treat to eat. According to Aidinas, the healers could also use them improve some skin conditions.

Trudging their path proved to be a trove. All played a hand in the more frequent than anticipated stops to pluck or bind up samples. Being transient himself, Dathin was the first to speak what Theo had been wondering. The group had been told to approach this project like a completely unknown space. Even if there hadn't been such bounty when the original mapping was completed, surely they had to have some clue of the assets within. Why do this now?

“Why wait so long? People have been flowing into the city for well over a year. There are already so many sick and hungry. And just...look at this place.” He swung his arms around the gesturing around the group.  Several of the team had stopped to pick various leaves and buds to use themselves whenever they decided to stop to eat.  

“They didn't care.” Irileth said absently, tilting her hair to keep her twists out of the way of her writing.

“Aye.” Halmor nodded. “We's alway' been able ta' keep the cellars full and the noble bellies round.”

“You best be 'memberin' it's those noble bellies that are keepin' the papers to our land and coin in our coffers.” His younger brother shot Halmor a warning glare. He had raised his voice a little above his brother’s conservative volume. Theo watched him resist casting looks to the older cadets.

“Whose gonna be tellin' of this lot? Only maybe three ofs them gots any skin in it.” Halmor huffed, motioning to Turcil in demonstration. The two shared the same dusky tan completions and based knowledge. But their approach and general outlook were as opposing as Halmor's dark brown eyes to Hirador's green. The elder's copper highlighted hair to his younger brother's near black roots were maybe a better view of where they melded and diverged. 

“Oi. Have a mite’a court’sy.” Hirador rolled his eyes, his voice dipping. Again he watched to see if the older cadets were too close in ear shot. “I think it’s Turcil’s  mot'er that’s up in th’ guild that buys mos’ our grain.”

“ Celdor-I know his folks be deal in' makin’ writin’ skins. Some’a our cousins has been selling their sheep 'n' goat skins ta' ‘em for ages.” The younger hissed through his teeth at his sibling. “You know pa's been thinkin’ 'bout turnin' the new patch for flax next season for ‘em."

"And...oi. Letter boy. Who you say your folk be?” He was more casual with the quartermaster's recruit. Most of those who fell into professions that answered to him ranked somewhere between servant and accountants with more on the lower social status of the range.

Lolach tried to ignore the conversation by confirming where Irileth should note different deposits that correlated with his stock list. When he couldn't wait out the silence following, he cleared his throat and straightened. Hoping to express both pride and humility, he admitted his father managed a particular series of mines. Dathin let out  a long whistle. It was the same guild faction that provided biggest source of ore that the military used.

“There!” Hirador was content that he had proven his point, ignoring the flair of embarrassment as his flawed assumptions. 

“ We are not our parents. Halmor’s not blamin' anyone for th' shortages. He’s pointin' out people who 'aven't felt som' strain 'fore are.” Elocar attempted to play peacemaker. “All those…of means… 'ave been askin' for ages. Things would'a be worse if they 'adn't met resistance."  

“And stars forbid they have to reckon with it.  Or put in good honest work themselves to get their finery.” Marien snorted indigently. Coming from farmers and working in kitchens made her less favorable to the old families. “Now don't you be giving me that look!” 

“I couldn't give a fig who be hearin'. Those yer tryin’ not to scare are just pretendin' we don't hear our whispers 'hind their doors. It's not upset any order yet. It’s not the right kind’a gossip. Talkin' down ‘bout too many will make their own business crumble.” She had learned where to step.

“You're from up the Poros, near where my aunt's village is?” Aidinas ask passively, bending down to sniff at a white flower Marien was debating. She confirmed they'd found wild onions not the near lookalikes death camas.

“Aye. Doubt th' others know it. It’s nothin’ big as the city here. We have our fair share of trades folk. More than mos’ out that way. So I seen it plenty.” Marien admitted conciliatory. “You put so many in’na place and those that are well ta’ do lose sight of what work goes into settin’ their dinner tables, fillin’ their wardrobes, an’ keepin’ things tidy. Not all their fault. They jus' don’t see it when there’s so much space ‘tween them an' neighbors who do that type’a work.” 

“We wouldn’t have shortages if we didn’t have half the country showing up at the gates.” Celador had bristled a little at the conversation, overhearing despite Hirador's efforts, but had remained silent. He held up his hand as he saw Aidinas’ head shoot up and his year-mate hissed his name.

“Have I lied? Have you heard me deny the right of those who have?”  No one was too quick to answer. “ We’re the closest defensible settlement. The old families understand that. Maybe it took them a bit long to see just how much more than usual would be needed. It doesn’t mean they’re not trying.” 

“Lolach’s uncle used to have gatherings every weekend. There hasn’t been one in two seasons now.” Turcil’s timid example in reluctant defense of Celdor's words was so sudden it startled Lolach to jump his quill bit, splattering extra drops of ink across his paper as he startled. 

“Would any of you say you wouldn't like to have things a little easier in life?” Celador pressed further, trying to squint at something through the foliage. “None of us signed up for this purely for the honor. Might be a big part of it. Not all.”

“My family has done well enough.” Irileth sprinkled some sand over her work to seal in the words before she stood and stretched. “We could have done far better. My aunts are as fine weavers as you'll ever find. More than once they've gained disfavor when they wouldn't prioritize one of the old city citizens over newer residents. They don't see why an exchange with a salt merchant is as valuable as a registrar's.”

“That’s th’ heart o’ the matter. They might be makin’ adjustments, but far less would be sore if they started ta’ see a person an’ not a class. Why should a somein' bringin’ in catch be treated less kindly than one o’ those that sail up th' coast ta’ bring back fancy things? They both be bravin’ water an’ only one o’ them break their hands an’ back daily.” Elocar tried to draw a little of the escalation away from Irileth. 

“It might not be about any of that.” Lolach finished his own current tally. “The maps in the contract archives are outdated. All it takes to cut off a resource for any group is someone setting a claim because a century ago their forefather owned a piece that ended with some bushes. Now what would happen if that group now covers a fifth of the forest? Best come to compromises while we have, if not the people who know how still in the city, good weather. Or if war keeps us from moving about.”

Lolach’s logic brought them all to an embarrassed silence. Splinters that were starting formed between the new team too early based on assumptions temporarily mended. Dathin and Halmor turned to examine an area of the forest with excessive interest trying to remove themselves from their shame. 

Theo cleared his throat. They couldn’t wallow in this. He suggested to the leader that the three of them angle off to the east while the rest of the group continued straight on. The land looked to start to it's decline a bit ahead at the edges. Animal tracks came and went from that direction.  It could mean an additional water source. Irileth was quick to roll up what she had been working on, insisting on joining them. Aidinas looked torn, wondering who might need her more.  

“Elocar has spent some time doing that work as well. More of you will be headed forward.” Turcil helped settle the healer's mind, having been less ruffled by the conversation.  “Not to mention Theo’s had to have picked up something from his mother as well. I'd like to tag on with them too, Celdor. Might be able to snag something a little more hearty to put along with those greens the others have been taking up for midday.”

“Aaaah. I'd not go too long. Those ants are wandering rather straight.” Hirador nodded to a line of them as they started to walk off. “An’ the dew was low when we left this morn'. Could be gettin’ some rain. It'd be hard trackin’ back if she ends up more than’ trinklin’.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Vaelah couldn't help but grin watching how giddy Dilgran was even as they passed from the cooler woods into the sprawl of sunny fields to the east. He was completely enraptured, consulting the team's scribe, Kemeer, about how to mark the type of geography in basic cartography. They had stopped so Gimaldor and the engineering apprentice, Sarissi, could  discuss any defenses that could be added to the area. At the far edge of the field it became hilly before the other side of the forest, the third group's area, sprung up. The dips were a potential blind spot for anyone marching in from that direction. Setting up tree posts could both establish a lookout and conceal archers to funnel an enemy in a specific direction on approach. 

Eberil's call from the top of a knoll that distracted Vaelah from her mirth. Climbing up to join the soldier, a sight in front of them made her beam. There was a large spread of weld. It wasn't usually found areas like this. Forests held too much moisture. It was a lucky combination of ground elevation and clearing by animal passage that made the patch thrive. Seeing the healer’s fixation, Eberil issued a warning. Her mother and aunts would be fighting the healers for the patch as both trades had use of it. 

Eberil gingerly touched Vaelah's elbow. To most the gesture was casual. For someone who at least knew of the soldier, such intimacy was strange. Eberil kept her gaze forward, pointing towards the distance for show as she leaned in. To the rest of the world it would look like she was pointing out something she spied ahead.

“Don't be lookin' back.” She whispered. Vaelah stiffened. “We’ve had someone trailin' us for a bit now. Was thinkin' it was critters at first. Don’t know of many not huntin’ that’d keep on this long.”

“What do you need?” Vaelah followed Eberil’s discretion. She kept her voice low, brain switching to action.  

 “Call o'er Dil. Ask 'im for help o'er that next hill. Let 'im know. Tell 'im to make back up to the tree line and come back aroun. Me and Gim'll circle back. I’ll ‘ave ‘im belly achin' bout you tellin' us we should fetch up somethin’  we left ‘hind. Try to trap 'em 'tween us. Then drive 'em out here to the second years.”

“And the rest of us?” Vaelah tugged her bag further up onto her shoulder.

“Keep ‘ere. I'll get the others ta' send th' civs your way. If we’re gone more than half an' hour, go up a ways, round back wide in'ta the trees. Get back ta' town. Fast as ya' can.” Vaelah nodded.

“You gots somethin' on ya ta' keep safe?” Eberil took a quick glance over. Vaelah made a subtle move, bending as to examine the base of a cluster of plants. The healer flashed the soldier the spare knife she kept by her boot. Eberil nodded in approval.

Eberil turned then, shaking her head exaggeratedly and stomping heavier than need be as she marched to the others. Vaelah waited until she had gotten half way down to where Gimaldor was speculating before calling out for her friend’s attention. Reluctantly Dilgran stopped his conversation and made his way over. 

Vaelah wasn't sure how she was cut out to be a performer. Dilgran didn't know her half as well as Aidinas. They had spent enough time together for him to be aware she wasn't exactly a lightweight. Asking for his help with a simple collection would be strange. If he hadn’t been alarmed before, the look that flashed across his face when they crested the hill and saw nothing but more grassland, he was then.

“I KNOW it's messy and stubborn. But we HAVE to see what we can get from it to bring back.” She grasped one of his hands, trying out a pout like she had seen on other girls do as they played coy. Vaelah knew there were people who had spied their time together and speculated she and Dilgran were doing more than comparing notes. So, she’d use their assumptions to her benefit. Even a failed attempt to act coquettish would be no different than other dozens of girls trying to catch someone’s eye. 

To his credit, Dilgran was quick on the uptake. He shook his head, let out a heavy sigh, and started trudging down. The dip wasn't that extreme. To be safe he sat and waited for her making sure their heads were out of sight from the others. Vaelah exhaled in relief that she hadn't ruined this before it started. Kneeling, she briefed him on Eberil’s plan.

“...I thought there was something strange.” Dilgran muttered. “Then I'd see birds fly off or a rabbit pop out. Blazes. I should have noticed.”

“The three other cadets didn't know. Or bring it up. Including the second years.” Vaelah patted his hand. There was a hint of a thankful smile before he became serious. Dilgran repeated Eberil's concern about her having something to protect herself.

“Keep safe.” She whispered, grabbing his wrist a moment before he slunk off, very slowly rising to make it look like he was coming up over a steeper hill than he was.

“Over there ya' said?” He pointed after a few steps up the next ridge. He cupped his hand at this side of his mouth as he shouted towards her to indicate greater space and distract anyone watching from his true direction.

Vaelah hugged her knees as she watched him vanish into the treeline. Her pulse was quickening. She closed her eyes. Air drew in and out of her nose slowly. Vaelah willed herself not to go back to the last time she was curled up and waiting for the unknown. She didn't dare to crawl up to see why the others hadn’t joined her yet.

It seemed like an age before the other non-combatant trainees appeared at the top of the bump. Thankfully they had enough sense to keep their thoughts to themselves as the older cadets whispered their orders for them to copy the healer. Vaelah's skin prickled when she was appointed in charge if the second year cadets took long returning.

In hushed tones she filled in the others the best she could. Libeth, the aid in the pantries and a liaison runner between the quartermaster’s people and local farmers, had been jumpy since the moment they set foot in the woods. She was jittering now. Vaelah offered her a hand to help her sit. Libeth’s skin was clammy despite her exertion and the rising temperature. Vaelah rubbed her back as she assessed the others.  Kemeer was keeping his eyes closed, mouthing words. A list? A mantra? Sarissi was plucking long blades of grass and twisting them together in a form of meditation.

Vaelah watched the shadows around her. She didn’t trust her instincts to judge the time. After the first third of the time allotted passed, she started eyeing what each of her companions were carrying. How much could be left behind to keep their steps light? She started itching when another third passed. 

Soon the control she had adopted with her problem solving mindset started to thin. Vaelah didn’t want to show to her anxious teammates. She dug her fingers into the grass. Did the ground have its own pulse buried too far down for her to feel? Did it’s thrumming work to keep the time of miners? Or would only the dwarven kind dwell deep enough to hear it? 

“OI. Vae! Come and see our bandits.” The timber in Dilgran’s call pumped air back into Vaelah's lungs.

Tension in her legs made her wobble as she stood. Her first steps were rigid. She didn't bother dusting the dirt off her leggins and dress. They were likely to get much worse before the day was out. What had her friend irritated? Dilgran was the most even headed boy she'd ever met. 

Rising over the hill gave her the answer. Gripped by the back collar of his shirt, Dilgran shoved forward a well tanned twelve year old. His matted mop of dark hair was littered with leaves and brambles. His sister scowled, furious. Her eyes were red at the brink of tears. Thorny burrs were tangled in her braids and clung to her dress. 

“MENRIN! HERADIS! WHAT IN THE STARS AND SEA ARE YOU DOING HERE?” Vaelah screamed, hands firmly at her hips echoing the same gesture their mother was prone to when outraged. The two kept silent. She could see the indent of Menrin's teeth biting down on his lip as she charged up to them.

“Out with it! You keep clamming up and you’re like to bite off that tongue of yours. Should I suggest a lashing more be added to what they’d plan for you each minute?” Meilyr and Heragel seemed the last people to turn to a swatch. The colloquialism worked to express the extreme trouble they were in. Menrin's mumbling was inaudible.

“You answer your commander like that?” She drew back her shoulders, switching posture to cross her chest, tilting her head with eyebrows raised. “Dilgran. Were this one an enrolled first year, what violations would he be facing?”

“Today there are care duties, exercises, and histories. That makes for a failure to report. Unauthorized enlistment as you weren't on assignment. Given anyone might be a turncoat,  mayhap they’d be charged with espionage. Disrespect and willfully disobeying a superior. Resisting apprehension. Willfully endangering or compromising a mission. Mix in Heradis and you've also got the endangerment of a civilian.” He listed without barely thinking. Menrin shrank a touch smaller with each item.

“Don't forget to tack on assaulting a superior. I'm going to have quite a shiner from that kick, runt.” Gimaldor's upper cheek and brow area already had signs of a welt.

“Exactly what do you think would be the consequence of such infractions?” Vaelah barely blinked, making sure she kept the children pinned with her eyes.

“Ya' bes’ not be countin' on makin' yer livin' sold'erin'.” Eberil snorted. “Ya' no' likely ta' keep yer boots. An’ ya’d be answerin’ to the division officer ya’ skipped work du’ty on too. Tha' many wrongs? A' leas' triple chores.”

“Luckily for you, Menrin, you've not sworn your words.” Dilgran’s tone gave Menrin a back a smidge of his height. “Mind you what we say in our report- and we’ll have a second incident to have to spend time writing on now- might factor into you being accepted or denied enlistment year after next. Can’t speak for the others, but I’m not feeling very charitable about wasting time without reason.” 

“We had to find Theo!” It was Heradis who broke, shoving herself in front of her brother as if she were the elder protecting him. Vaelah almost felt for the boy. The shame dripping off him dug at her sympathy.

“Are your parents alright? Dergar?” The desperation in Heradis' voice caught Dilgran's attention. Vaelah sifted through her brain for other answers. If something had happened to Bronwyn or Arondir the military would have likely sent their own scout and to the correct area.

“Um...” Heradis looked at her brother for help that wasn't forthcoming. “They’re…they’re fine...we had to talk to him alone. Something’s wrong and he won’t talk around Mother and Papa. We knew he’d done something wrong. Thought he might be keepin’ his words to himself ‘cause he got into more trouble. Him and Papa’ve been workin’ together. Thought he didn’t want Papa to know. To disappoint him.” 

“I think Menrin just wanted to see what you --”

“Heradis.” Menrin hissed, doing his best to regain his composure. When at last he spoke he drew on his most formal speech in attempt to erase the childish image being formed of him. “There's a personal matter I had to discuss with him. I tried to reach him before the start of your mission but there were....delays. I didn't mean to bring her along. She refused to stay and I couldn't leave her where we were when she caught up with me. It wasn’t safe. We spotted everyone heading out of town.”

“We started to follow Theo's group. They had all these things, we guessed to bring back stuff, so we tried to get to him before they got too deep in the forest. But this one here got scared, ran off, and...and...” Menrin’s fists were balled, his teeth clenched tight.“We got lost." 

"Chased." Heradis chuffed. "By a hairy--"

"That boar was a monster!” Menrin glared at his sister before she could spit out snark. “Maybe it wasn't that big...FINE! It was a baby! But babies have mothers. EVERYONE knows not to fuss with a mother.”

“It's not my fault! We haven't gotten to forest navigation yet!” Menrin was snappy in his defense. “All I know is from Papa's stories. So when I saw a fresh boot print, I started in that direction. We were going to let you do what you need and trail you back. I wasn't spying. I was trying NOT to see anything you were doing. That's why I didn't come closer.”

The group silently gauged each other’s reactions on how to respond. Eberil let out a raspy sigh in the back of her throat. Libeth looked like she wanted to comfort siblings. It was taking all Vaelah had not to just tell them it was all alright. The older cadets looked torn over whose authority it was to address this as the children were clearly familiar to two people in the party.

“Of course they're not going to give kids like you lessons that would have you all trouncing through the woods to get lost in.” Gimaldor decided to continue the lecture. “What I really want ta’ know is--Ya’ really have to kick me THAT hard, boy? They ask me when you get to your real training and I’ll tell ‘em you've got good hand to hand instincts.”

“Uhh...” Menrin stuttered. Even Vealah wasn’t sure if that was an insult or praise. “I heard my sister scream. When my shoulder got touched I just... reacted. I'm sorry um...do I...do I call you sir?”

“ You were right to help your sister. Some of these folk from town are here so we can practice that ourselves.” Dilgran was unable to stay harsh too long when it came to children. At least Vaelah could say she didn't crumble first. 

“It was smart to use our tracks.” Fincal, a second year added. “You had the sense of duty not to interrupt our operation more than necessary. BUT-- you should have known better than to follow in the first place. You could have waited at the forest’s edge for him to return if the academy gates were too public.” 

“Now what would I file this sort of report under?” Kemeer mumbled as he started rummaging for his lowest grade paper to get the task out of the way while he had fresh statements.

“Vaelah?” Heradis took a few steps forward and tugged at the older girl's apron. “ Please don't let Menrin get in trouble. He really wouldn't have had to come if I had just let him go by himself. All he’s EVER wanted since we got here was to be a cadet. I don’t want to be what keeps him from it.”

“That's not our decision.” As gently as she could, Vaelah plucked a few of the burrs from Heradis’ hair. “He made his own choices, Her. If it comes to that, it won’t be your fault.”

“There's nothing to be done about his now.” Galron, the eldest cadet, stepped forward. “This is supposed to be a practice on how handle potential obstacles. Civilians in crisis is one of those things. Neither of them are hurt. We're not under attack. We're closer to looping back from our projected endpoint than the distance back. We could bend our mandate and send two back with them. There’d be more than three people total. Personally, I think there’s more lost than gained in that choice. “

“You said he was in basics?” Fincal asked Dilgran. “Menrin, was it? Contrary to your behavior, I know you must have been taught how to listen and take orders. Are you capable of doing so now?”

“Yes, sir!” Menrin stood formally, turning to the second year attentively.

“I want you to be Eberil's shadow. You are not to get in her way. You are to watch her.” Galron took on his role of commander.

“ Gimaldor says you've got good fighting instincts. If we've some down time maybe she can help you more with that. I pity anyone who gets down to a one-on-one brawl with her. ” His compliment soothed out the initial tension Vaelah caught in Eberil's posture. Vaelah knew all to well being given certain tasks simply because of your gender. She couldn’t imagine how miffed she’d feel in someone like Eberil who seemed to veer away from those conventions.

“I 'spose I gots the know how in dealin' with runts. I’ve some pesky sibs as well.” Her second sigh of the afternoon was pretense. 

“I have a hard time believing that fancy sister of your was all that demanding.” Gimaldor shot Eberil a look. 

The distant glaze in Gimaldor's eyes made Vaelah roll hers. She’d place a comfortable bet that he wasn’t thinking of a much younger sibling. Eberil matched her reaction.

“Why'd ya think wes both be wantin' to gets out'a the family trade 'fore? You tried workin' a loom or detanglin' thread af'er a pair'a brothers and relat'ons of an age been whirlin' through the place?” Gimaldor shrugged of Eberil's answer that concealed its correction without calling him out directly.

“Can I stay with you?” Heradis whispered to Vaelah. Vaelah looked up at the de-facto leader, not sure if she would be the right person to answer.

“Hold on, I think I know you!” Sarissi piped up. “You're the carpenter's daughter, yes? My brother's enlisted. He was paired up with Theo on that extra training.“

“I bet you're that girl he told me about when they got back from the new headquarters. You helped them with their bench project.” Heradis nodded vigorously. 

“My brother said you had a better eye than all of them, really enthusiastic too. Why don’t you keep me company? I'm training to design things your father or people like Dilgran's  might have a hand in making.”

“CAN I?” Heradis' eyes went as wide as apples. She practically ran to the engineer who launched straight into a lesson pointing out to the child the space she and Gimaldor had been looking before they were scattered. 

“We've burned enough daylight on this. I want a vote.” Galron announced. “We'd have to focus on resources specifically on mapping rather than gathering if we don't want to camp overnight. So far, I haven't seen anything that would gain us points for staying through. Not now that we've got these new additions to look after.”

“What if we split?” Dilgran suggested. “One half of the group can go slower, focus on collections. The other half can try to cover more ground, noting space and trying to keep track of anything interesting at a first glance. They can loop back to meet the collectors. If they find anything worth staying, we can send two people back with the kids like you said. We’d have to report back before dark either way.”

The idea was well received. When divisions started, Dilgran admitted the group going on ahead would be better served by having Kemeer. As much as he wanted to be a part of the map making process, he'd not be able to capture things as quickly or accurately as someone with the specific training. Vaelah was to stay with the collectors as the cadets had enough basic aide knowledge and muscle to get someone injured back to her. 

Gimaldor, the supplier girl, Libeth, and Fincal would make up the rest of the collectors. Galron, Eberil, and Sarissi would be moving forward . At least two military members would be with each team to guard the noncombatants. Having both children with the second team would have been concerning if both hadn’t proven how well they could move.

As their team headed back into the woods, Gimaldor pointed up to the sky. There was a slight switch in the wind. It wasn’t definite enough to signal if it would be lingering pattern or just an upset. The clouds didn't look bursting. That would be hard to see when covered by the canopies. Gilmor confirmed his thought, advising them on some other potential signs of foul weather to keep an eye out for. The stirring that had been in Vaelah’s stomach since she had gotten up churned back to life. The peace of the woods had been restorative. With the shift in air and the excitement of the miniature stalkers had banished it. That old knot came as a fierce reminder that peace didn’t always last.

Chapter Text

Theo's suspicion proved fruitful. They journeyed a little longer and further than intended, following a small stream. It brought them to an area unmarked on their old maps. The water flowed  into a crack in the mountain leading to cave network.  It's opening chamber could easily hold about twenty men if they squeezed through the narrow opening. A tunnel further back ran far deeper. Without proper lighting and equipment it wasn’t safe to investigate. As it was, the cave could be perfect for hiding people or provisions.

It was possible this was a fresh water source separate from those recorded. Maybe a small branch off of a larger isolated source. If they were truly lucky it would be one unknown to the enemy as well. Contaminating central flows was one of the oldest tools to defeat a city defending itself in a siege.

Dallying a little on the way back, Halmor made them all take a shot at netting fish where their stream ran heartily. Irileth fell into a fit of giggles when Theo nearly dropped his catch. He ended up half soaked as the creature thrashed, splashing him in its attempt at escape. The clumsy reprieve made her laugh harder. Theo made a quick brush of his hand across the water. A wave of sprinkles arched her way. The playful shriek  extracted from their scribe set off a full on splash party between the entire group. 

Recomposing themselves the group justified the delay with the half dozen fish they had managed to nab. The boys took to collecting mushrooms and herbs as they dried off with the brothers and occasionally Theo's guidence. It gave Irileth a chance to catch up on her books without endangering it with drips. They stopped at a berry patch on the way back to nab an apology giftto the others for their delay only to be met with another surprise. In one of Hirador's hasty snares was a rabbit. 

As per the plan they swung their course on a curve to get a better idea of the surrounding area before rejoining their unit. Theo hailed Irileth over several times to mark down what he thought were medicinal finds. He was ecstatic to come across  a patch of flowers that reached out from a cone before curling out with one petal a purple gradient. Theo had remembered his mother saying one day she wished they had more in stock. They did poorly in woodlands and were not enough of a staple to earn limited space in the keep’s gardens. Theo wondered if Aidinas and Vaelah would be as pleased. Maybe if they were the ones to bring it back it would erase some of the lingering marks against their character.

As they walked their scribe was engrossed in asking questions and marking. As much as she enjoyed being sociable, Irileth became serious as she worked. It was the first indication Theo had of something other than a surface resemblance to Eberil. SHe remained focused even as the others took to jesting with each other. They had to remind Halmor that this was still supposed to be covert when he started to bellow out a worker’s jig. the farmer's son would have seen fit to start a working song as they marched on. 

Suddenly, Turcil signaled stop. Theo’s eyes darted about the treeline watching for shifts in light inconsistent with swaying foliage and darting animals. Nothing. Except... It was quiet. Too quiet. The birds ahead had already been spooked off. 

With hand motions, Turcil directed the brothers to fall behind him. They went , casting aside pride. Irileth leapt behind Theo.  If not for knowing she had been near his side, Theo would have spun at the feel of hands on his shoulder blades. Instead he twisted his head and nodded to the girl, trying to be reassuring. From behind them Dathin whispered he had the scribe’s back. For someone who, to Theo’s knowledge, didn’t have a combative background he admired the engineer’s bravery.

Close by was a path barely recognizable through overgrowth. Turcil motioned for Theo to approach. Gently, Theo encouraged Irileth to join the brothers. Dathin touched her elbow, smiling sportively.  Irileth slowly snaked her arm around her fellow civilian’s and crept to join the others. As Theo approached, the second year pointed to the bow at his back and then to a tree with heavy branches that hung over to give a view of the clearing ahead. 

Theo swallowed hard. He could do this. He had survived attacks of men and uruk alike with every sort of weapon. This was a piece of cake. So what if Arondir had been close by at those times? 

Get a hold of yourself! This is what you signed up for! Theo’s inner voice scolded. He wiped out the fear-fog blanketing his brain, motioning confirmation of the order. Theo crouched and inched on taking caution going to the the trunk. He glanced back one last time to see Turcil drawing his own bow to cover Theo’s ascent.  

Theo measured his task. The first limb was barely within his fingertip's reach. These were not quite the same types of trees he had grown up with. Climbing hadn’t been one of his regular pastimes even if they were. Those of Tirharad considered nothing but the shallowest parts of the woods elven territory. You didn’t pass into them without a matter of your livelihood or survival being of concern. 

Theo's only real opportunity was when he accompanied Bronwyn. Before he came of an age where she started trying to actively teach him her trade, she encouraged his play. Theo had preferred to hunt and forge over scaling bark. He dreamed of stumbling upon hidden nooks or at least maybe an unexpected meal. It was why he had such strong suspicions about the stream. He never went too far on his own. First from fear. Then out of the stubbornness that came with prejudice.

Arondir had encouraged Theo to practice climbing in addition to weaponry on their way to Pelargir just for this type of reason. Theo was grateful for Arondir’s patience with his fumbling. Such an activity was almost as natural as breathing to Arondir’s kind. Like walking, scaling up branches was part imitation and part instinct. Theo had been more mortified of how he must have looked than his multiple failures. Some of which ended up with the elf catching him as easily as a babe.

Theo suddenly remembered something nothing to do with trees, but everything about scaling. He had seen one of the men on Meilyr's team do it the previous week.  A house’s framework wasn't the same as a tree, but maybe...

Theo untied the coil of rope at his belt. Using his best knotting technique he created two loops for handholds at either end. He launched one end around the trunk, nestling it over the lowest branch. He stretched up and snatched the swaying end, pulling the rope in tight against the trunk. Testing with a tug to make sure the handles would hold, he used his upper arms to drag himself up those few extra inches until his boots caught a grip on either side. He inched his arms and the rope up once more. He pushed with a half hops until he got his feet on the solid resting spot of the lowest branch that looked stable. 

Theo held his breath, freezing, waiting for the rustling of disturbed leaves to settle. He hoped it was dense enough to seem like the flight of a bird or a territorial race between squirrels to an onlooker. He crept higher with normally, using branches as ladder rungs.  Reaching a resting perch he tied one loop of the rope around a sturdy limb and secured the end to his waist. Theo had heard unfortunate testimony of those on the construction site that had lost their balance. The same trick left them with a world of bruises but their necks intact. 

Stable, Theo gradually moved his head. He crept around the trunk until he had a better view of the path ahead. There wasn't a sight or sound to hint of anyone. He did think he glimpsed something just out of his view. Carefully he hoisted half his body up, crossing the trunk as he maintained as much of a shield as he could.

There. Turcil had spotted something not someone. It was one of the larger baskets they were issued. The discovery put more of the scenery in focus. He had mistaken a stuffed sack for a boulder. His blood ran cold. Leading up to the basket there was clear breakage of the ground. Many heavy steps had intercepted the path.

Slipping down enough to be seen by those waiting below, Theo waved for the others to proceed with caution, not with an all clear. Returning to his perch, he maneuvered his bow from his back before circling the trunk to brace his back against it. Theo notched the bow as the group approached the path and drew it to loose at trouble. Eberil might be the best archer among them, Theo hated to admit Firpol was a close second, but he had improved.  

The area remained undisturbed. The stiffness in their limbs showed no one was at ease. They began to move a little more freely as they saw the remains up close. Irileth scrambled through her notes trying to see which party member had been in charge of what. Turcil called the all clear. 

Theo reversed his process, using the rope as a loop to help him get down the tricky parts until he felt comfortable jumping. He kept his eyes on the horizon, rearranging himself before rejoining the others. The signs of distress were worse up close. Split open sacks impossible to see from above were littered everywhere along the way. Floral harvests were scattered and crushed under boots.

One bag was pinned into the ground with an arrow. From the contents left he assumed it was Marien’s. He dreaded what this signified. Theo reflexively dislodged the arrow as gently as he could. By small luck the arrowhead and shaft were intact. He added it to his quiver hoping he'd have a chance to send back the favor.

“Is...was it...could it be... be them? Those..those things?” Irileth’s eyes darted around madly. Her arms wrapped tightly around herself. The Uruks.

“They can't be out in the day, right?” Halmor hardly sounded confident.

“There might be enough shade here for them.” Theo realized his mistake as the words left him. They weren't fellow soldiers. 

“I don't think it's them.” Theo added quickly and truthfully. The second arrow he yanked that had been  wedged in the ground splintered in half. He pointed out its fetching, stomach lurching as he remembered one of a different sort still coated in his mother’s blood.

“They..they gather different feathers and...their arrowheads aren't solid like this. They’re–” His he choked on the words he tried to share. Theo could almost remember the one in his memory nearly dried to the flooring when retrieved. “They're barbed so...so you can't just pull them out. It...it does more damage. Rips everything inside and...”

He hadn't noticed that he had kept staring at the sharp point, how pale his knuckles clutching it were, until Irileth's fingers gently encircled his wrist. Theo blinked away the shadows. Turcil’s expression was pulled down low as listened. Those two at least seemed to know enough about his mother’s story.

“She's ...she's alright now?” Irileth's hushed words eased the knots within him. Theo swallowed and nodded, handing the half with the arrowhead to her.

“It's not a dagger. But it's sharp. Keep it on you. In case.” Irilith looked down to the small knife everyone had been given in her hand. She had drawn it from her bag at the first sign of disturbance. “It's always good to have a backup. Especially if you're not used to...all of this. You're easier to disarm.”

“They were chased.” Turcil’s cold clear words dragged Theo’s attention away before he could notice if she took offense to his words.

Theo saw it now. Footprints stamped over each other in the dirt. Some had heavier front fall prints and long strides signalling a running group. Over those were the less rushed marks more evenly taken with slightly shorter strides. It must belong to a company of men. Near where Turcil stood were signs of an abrupt stop. 

There was an impression that suggested someone had taken a sword stance. Between the mark and where they were and there laid a shattered bow. Theo rattled a slew of slurs hoping that it had not been Elocar's. Like Eberil, maybe because they worked together on it, Elocar was much stronger with archery and close combat than a sword. The ground was more saturated here. The imprints squished in deeper, distorting with the suction of the next step, making it difficult for him to judge a height with his limited tracking skills. 

Hirador pointed at the stray arrows with shots directed back at the attackers inbetween. They had come from further ahead than the standoff. Ahead greenery was squashed, drier pieces snapped. They had  diverted directions. Good. It would have taken the attackers a moment to decide who to go after or how to split themselves. Theo's unit had a chance.

“I think...I think they had a head start. Some of them.” To their surprise it was the engineer who spoke up.

“I...I only know what you two showed us today. But I don't see a lot of disturbance that way. “ Dathin pointed behind him. “Wouldn't the archer have made their shot if they were really close?  This clearing isn’t that big. They don’t stop to try to fight off the others until here.”

“There are some skidding marks.” Turcil murmured in though. “People fell. The broken bow. There had to be some struggling. ” 

“There's a lot of rocks there. Maybe someone just tripped?  Or they lost their balance when their packs got hit. Our archer could have dropped his bow, or had it yanked from him when he was on the defense. It was stepped on.” Theo offered. 

“They’re alive then!” Irileth’s optimistic yelp made them all jump and fall into cautious glances at each other. Should they encourage optimism? Irileth caught their look and rolled her eyes as if they were debating on telling her she had something in her teeth. 

“If they were in a hurry, and someone was injured, there wouldn't be time to help them or drag a body. This is about where we thought we’d meet up with the group, right ?” Turcil drew out the sounds of his affirmation. “Well then things must have been going as planned for quite some time. If they got away from the people chasing them, do you think they’d be done laying low yet? Let alone come back for a body?” 

Theo blinked rapidly. Sure, scribes also trained as scouts and messengers. They had to be observant. It was still strange to hear someone who, unlike her sister, seemed gentle of thought considering the priority placed on a corpse. Even more so when the only a hint of being disturbed in her matter-of-fact statements was a slight tremor as her words trailed off.

“Right. You four.” Turcil pointed at the farmers and the two apprentices. ”I want you to head back towards the city. Stay low. Be as quiet at you can. We don't know what's out there.”

“No.” Theo felt the sharp denial leave his mouth before his brain stopped him. He froze only for a second realizing he was contradicting a command. 

“We don't know where the attackers went of if they were alone. They stopped chasing our unit when they realized those weren't sacks of coins being dropped. Or gave up and circled back up in the woods. We can't just send them on their own. They’re not trained for this.”

“We don't have time to find them some place to hide.” The older boy came closer, dropping his voice as if they weren’t crowded close enough for the others to hear every syllable.

“I'm not one much for hiding. ” Halmor huffed. “ I might not know all the tricks you do, but I can get through a scrap.”

“This is a little more than a scrap.” Turcil blistered.

“I'm going as well. I might not be a part of the guard, but I can help. Half of what we're working on designing are defenses or weapons. I know what to watch for” Dathin backed up the sentiment.

“Wasn't I the one who snagged what was s'posed to be a munch or two with my traps? I reckin' I might be able to scale some of my tricks . What's a man compared to a bear?” Hirador jumped to the front beside his older brother.

“I...I'm...” Irileth hesitated. The confidence from her earlier observation drained now that her words had to come spontaneously. “This… this is madness.”

“ I'm useless beside all of you. I wasn't planning on my first field assignment to be an ambush! Well that would be the definition of ambush. Yes, I’m terrified. Clearly.” Her nerves gave her words a slight tittering. “But I won't be a liability. I said I aimed to be trained to be sent to the front and...even if I've not had time to prepare myself for it...here it is.”

“I just...I needed a moment and... and oh fer all th' stars. Untan'le yer knots girlie. Nows no time to be frayin' “ Irileth clamped her hand over her mouth. Her self enforced choice to abandon her childhood speech patterns slipped away. She cleared her throat. “I won't be a burden. I've good eyes, good hands, and good ears. I can take command as well as any soldier. My mind just needs a task to get in order. It’s… the suddenness of things I have to work at.”

Turcil sighed in defeat, changing his order to scavenge the discarded supplies for anything of use. As they sorted through things, their leader pointed in the direction they’d be headed. Curious, Haldor paused to ask why that one. 

“There’s blood that way. Less guessing where their target is. Weak prey is easy prey.” At this point, there as no use sugar coating the matter. He needed them to bail now if they were going to. None did.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Guessing from the foliage above almost a half hour had passed since Vaelah's group split. They stayed close to the treeline. It took them along an intersection between environments giving them a variety of samples. Vaelah was grateful for Libeth and Fincal’s local knowledge and keen eyes. They could point out things she was unfamiliar with. It was especially helpful in the denser areas of growth. They had about an hour before they should be turning into the woods to catch up with the others. 

“I should have kept Heradis with me.” Vaelah picked at the handle of her basket with her thumbnail, mumbling to Dilgran walking beside her. 

“Vae. They’re in good care. They're out of the open space. Could you really say no to Heradis after Sarissi spoke up? It was like winter gifing for her!” Dilgran pat her back, rubbing a couple circles on it. Vaelah exhaled, trying to relax.

“I know. Smething's off. I can't explain it. Menrin's impulsive. But he's a smart lad. What could possibly be so important he felt he had to ask Theo away from his parents?” Vaelah spun to face Dilgran. The taller boy's nose was crinkled up in thought.

“You do realize there's as many years between you and Theo as there is you and that 'lad'?”

“DILGREN!” She huffed.

“See, child.” He gave just the hint of the smile as he started past her. Vaelah stood slack jawed. Had Ser Restrained-and-Obedient actually teased someone who wasn't Theo? If she weren't so angry she'd be proud.

“I'm serious.” Vaelah nearly tripped over a root, hopping on one foot to catch her balance catching back up wit him. “Menrin's BARELY twelve. Do you remember how awkward you were at that age? Being caught between young and the world treating you grown?”

“I expect you’d know it well, being about his size. Good thing the healers haven't a requirement for such. ” Dilgran immediately haulted, stunned by his own words.  His eyes were wide when he twisted back to meet Vaelah's own stuck stare. 

“Vae, I--” He stuttered in search of apology. Vaelah's cheeks burned as she fought to block out his words. Never did she think she'd hear the cheap jab from him. Not in a context that marked her as incapable. She charged on.

“I...I didn't think that through. I don’t know why I’d try to jest like that.” Dilgran snatched for her hand as she passed him. Vaelah steeled herself, not releasing the displeasure from her features. He slumped with guilt. “I didn’t mean it… I've only ever seen you...well you. Most the time you act like the eldest of all of us. Others…well the ones worth paying attention to... speak well of you. I mean, how many first years could make up that potion thing you did for Theo?”

“That was Aidinas.” Vealah wrenched out of his grip, choosing to stare at her boots. The praise came differently from one of her peers than it did the adults. “I just helped.”

“Did you see who they have on Theo's team? The city's worried about two things. Having what we need to fight and having what we need to eat.” Dilgran wasn't ready to let her dismiss her abilities. “His team has a healer, a cadet apprenticed his mother as one, two farmers, and a local girl familiar with wild foods. Us? Libeth knows a little about what’s good for a kitchen, not sure if she's ever gathered what ends up there. Fincal knows bits, but he’s been better at just pointing out new things. In our team, our mentors practically put all the burden of bringing back what's going to heal us and fill us all on you. You think they'd trust that to anyone?”

“You don't have to do that.” Vaelah wandered to a patch of bright yellow flowers, yanking out her knife to get down to the roots. “I work hard at this. A lot of people do. They probably just thought different groups would end up with different goals depending on who they sent.”

“It doesn't matter what they think.” Vaelah wiped her hands on her apron as she stood, puffing out her chest with a deep inhale. Her face was set with determination. “Being the best healer I can is what counts. As long as I do that, they can see what they want.”

“Hey,” Dilgran bumped her with his elbow. Its landing was comical with the difference in their frames. “You’re worth more than what you can do.”

“ Aidinas thinks so—She really is much more gentle than she came across this morning. Still quite in her own thoughts, though. ” 

“...Says the person I've only heard speaking more than a few sentences not related to what they're doing at a time to Lady Bronwyn and Theo outside of kin. And me I guess.” Dilgran poked gently. "No. Horses don't count." 

Vaelah crinkled her nose, fingers straying across the grasses at her tips. She didn’t reject or accept his assessment of her. Vaelah plucked a random flower to twirl between her fingers. “You’re so generous with your prattle yourself.”

“I think Gimaldor once called it 'stoic casual'. I don't mind talking. Others just like it more. Listening's helpful. I can't help how people take that either.” Dilgran shrugged. “Maybe that’s our solution. We'll put my  silence and looking like a small mountain to use. I'll just stand next to you and frown. People wouldn't even dare open their mouths.”

“I believe someone just told me we're more than what people see? Let me think. Who was that now?” Vaelah tapped her chin with the tip of a flower she had plucked as she twirled the end of one of her braids with the other finger. Dilgran tugged on the other spinning strands playfully in protest. The insult was forgotten. Vaelah was distracted, squinting briefly at the horizon, sheilding her eyes with the hand that had been playing with her hair. 

“You know...” Dilgran started, watching her dismiss whatever had caught her attention. Vaelah tilted her head back towards him, curious about his hesitation. “Theo appreciates you too.”

“Right! Oh he thanked me—he's kind but...” Vaelah blurted a half laugh before her spirits fell into her stomach. Her feet were very interesting today. “He didn't even remember my name. When I brought him the salve. Weeks on the road and-- ”

“That's fine!” She jolted into upright posture, realizing how dejected she sounded. “I wouldn't expect him to have remembered. I'm just one of his mother's students and someone who pesters his best friend from time to time. I was only one of many his mother, Arondir, and himself brought here. I’m grateful, of course. It’s not as if I hold him with the same…enthusiastic regard as Menrin does. ”

“ I hope when I've earned my titlte he might consider coming to me if he's hurt, of course. Other than that.” Vaelah shrugged.

“That's not—-” Dilgran stumbled over his thoughts, stopping to allow the two behind them coming at a fast walk to catch up. 

“OI! Lovebirds! No time to woo.” Gimaldor yelled ahead. “We've got a job, remember?”

Vaelah rolled her eyes. She exchanged a look of exasperation with her friend. It was not the first time someone had thrown that sort of comment at them these past weeks. Vaelah wasn't blind. The older boy was comely, the subject of his share of giggling among girls and a few boys whose appreciation might be in respect or a little more devious. Anyone would be lucky for his devotion. But he was...well, Dilgran! They had common spirits, but not kindred in that manner. In times like this Vaelah understood why people like Aidinas curated friend groups.

“Gimaldor. I truly pity your existence if you've never had a friend with different anatomy. Though it would explain a thing or two. I'm sorry to poison the gossip well but it IS possible to enjoy someone's company without wanting to tangle up sheets with them.” Vaelah narrowed her eyes, her bag slipping down from her shoulder to dangle  loosely in her fist.

Dilgran urged her not to pay attention. It was just Gimaldor being his occasionally rough self. He infamously blamed it on his time at sea with less reputable sailors. Vaelah had heard nothing of Gimaldor's past. Dilgran’s caution was loud enough to be a warning to his year mate.

“Ouch. Vaelah! Gentle. It’s true Dilgran’s a little rough.” Gimaldor pretended to mishear. “Surely tha’s not ALL bad. He's got that rugged dark look. Sweet o’ ya to think someone would ‘ave the patience ta involve sheets, what with that ‘ravish me’ thin’ he's got goin’ on. I mean look at them hands! That's got’ta say something’  ‘bout even better attributes. ” Gimaldor smirked as he approached, shooting Dilgran a wink. Vaelah braced herself.

“But if ya going to take'a pass on him...” Gimaldor's grin revealed a slight gap in his otherwise rather well kept teeth. " it'd be kindly to let the rest o' us get a chance, no?" 

 Vaelah tossed the flower in her hand towards the smirk in exasperation. She had true sympathy for a very pink and near stuttering Dilgran. Gimaldor might call her the innocent one, but her friend was completely oblivious to his appeal. He had no awareness of the attention he drew. Even if Gimaldor had just been given to provoke a reaction. Along with his playful banter he was an infamous flirt with near anyone with a pulse. 

“Oi. As a healer, I can assure you that folk tale is just that- Hogwash. Hand size has nothing to do with--”

“Well low tide strand me! Ya' took the time to make an inspection! There some warm blood in 'er after all!” Gimaldor gasped, placing his hand with fingers arched over his heart in mock shock. 

“Gimaldor.” Dilgran hissed, shock turning to irritation. he ducked his head as low as it would go and subtly nudged Vaelah. “Ignore him.”

“Seems to me,” Lisbeth reached them, handing on a hefty basket suddenly to Gimaldaor. He received the unexpected load with an ommfh. “You're  just sore you didn't get ta’ test that theory yourself.”

Gimaldor’s bristled at the sudden comeback. He rarely had someone to match him. He quickly withdrew, humbled. A circle of banter and proceeding laughter cleared the air. Vaelah let the exchange fall from her concern. Given that Gimaldor was the eldest here, it was lucky the exchange was as mild as it was. He was just another virile man dancing to the tune he was taught. At least Gimaldor seemed not the type to press their jest into something more than words given the chance. He loved the show of it.

Abruptly Dilgran became alert. He held up his hand for silence. As earlier he squinted across the open plain towards the hills. This time, Vaelah spotted a bobbing speck looking in the same direction. Two figures scrambled towards them. One stumbled as they looked behind.

Both cadets readied their bows. Dilgran kept watch on the horizon. Gimaldor targeted the runners. When their features came closer to view Dilgran told his year mate to withdraw.  

Trusting Dilgran’s instincts, Vaelah followed after his dash to meet the two people. Closer she saw the standard issue cloaks given to all those sent out. These were two of the civilians from the third group. The boy, one of the carrier guild's, clutched his arm looking frantically behind him every few seconds. The girl was of the merchant class. They didn’t even register the party before them, terrified of what was pursuing them.

The girl collapsed into Dilgran's arms when he reached out to snatch and steady her. Sobs clogged her throat, strangling out her words. Vaelah pushed herself to reach the boy just as he fell to his knees. Contrasting against pale knuckles, blood had already started to dry on the hand that sealed whatever wound beneath.

Vaelah reached for her water flask, demanding to see his arm. The boy groaned as he released his grip. A fresh trickle of red appeared as Vaelah washed off the area. The cut wasn’t as deep as it had appeared. The boy's constant movement kept the wound from sealing. Not deep enough to require stitching, Vaelah bound it up tightly, instructing him to continue keeping pressure on and try to be still to allow it to coagulate.

Seeing he was safe, Vaelah twisted around to the other victim.  At a glance she had mistaken splatters of blood as a pattern on her dress. Vaelah sprang to her feet. The girl shook her head ‘no’ furiously.

“N-not. Mmm..meh....MINE. H—H--He's sss He’s d-d- dead! Stars! They s-shot him! He...they shot–!” Standing attentively behind with the rest of the group, Lisbeth gasp asking who. Vaelah held up finger to sign for a moment of silence. 

“Hey, hey, I'm Vaelah, okay? Vaelah.” She dipping her shoulders and head low, trying to get the girl's attention rather than using touch to do so. “Can you tell me your name?”

“H..Haethmir. I'm Haethmir.” She stuttered, eyes still downward and wide.

“Good. Haethmir. Can you do me a favor? Can you look at me? Just me? Good. Very good. Haethmir, you're safe. We don't see anyone coming behind you. You're alright here.” The girl gave a trembling nod. She was still still heaving in air. “I'm going to touch your hand now, is that okay?”

The girl, maybe two years her elder, nodded with more steadiness. Vaelah took the girl's hand and placed it on top of the palm she held out. She asked the girl to focus there, watch. When Haethmir’s breathing steadied, Vaelah told her to keep watching where she was moving their hands. She raised her palm slowly up. Haethmir kept hers pressed tightly , responding to the slow circles Vaelah formed. Gradually she was able to collect herself, brain calmed by refocusing.

“Now. Can you tell me who was shot?”

“We all were.” There was a squeak in the boy's voice behind them . “They tried at least.”

“Ambush. We were ambushed. From further to the north-east. They just came out of nowhere.” Haethmir elaborated.

“Our group split. Not long after we started hearing the shouting.  The screams.”

“Then everything just went… quiet. They just appeared. They came at us and...and I..I don't know his name. One of the cadets. He pulled me behind him and they...they.” Haethmir lost her words. She twisted quickly, the memory dislodging whatever was in her stomach. Vaelah rubbed her back gently, giving her affirmations.

“I was further away.” The boy starred at his hands. “The younger military kid. The small one. These two got to me. He yanked us down. The next shots missed us, but they were so close.” 

“ We ran. He shouted, and we ran. And ran. And...and then there was this bank. Roots hung down everywhere. He shoved us in and told us to be quiet.” The boy’s voice trailed off. 

“He...he said...we were close to the field. To your section. We’d wait and run again. If we didn't see you right off we were supposed to get into the trees and make for Pelargir proper.” Haethmir’s voice quivered but lasted as she caught up. 

“They were talking practically right above us before they turned and searched up in the other direction. The cadet crawled out and over to the other side of the bank. He started running back towards where we came from. He.... He didn't have to. Why didn’t we just all go?”

“He was trying to distract them.” Dilgran furrowed forehead lines popped out as he played the out the scene in his mind.

“Were they the creatures?” Lisbeth's voice pitched up and cracked. The boy shook his head.

“Man. Definitely man. They...they were rugged. A little wild. Tangled hair. Skin like...like some of the coal miners. How they look like no matter how much they'd scrub there's always bits on 'em?”

“Patched. Their clothes were patched up.” Haethmir was caught in the haze of her own replay. She rubbed at her arms, the shock chilling her despite the midday heat.

“ One of them he... he near found us but…the cadet he...he shot him. Before he could hurt us. The body fell right in front of us. He saved me. Twice.” 

“Do you hear where they were headed? What they were doing in that part of the woods? Have a guess at how many?” Gimaldor questions piled up but were given methodically. Slowing adrenaline could cause lethargy and freezing of thoughts rather than lucidity. 

“One seemed mad the chase making them late? A meeting place, or something.” the boy narrowed his eyes like it would filter through his memories as sure as the action did for vision. “He didn’t want to be last and ending up doing grunt work?”

“It went so fast. I couldn't tell how many were even after us. When we got to run there seemed to be so many more.” Haethmir nodded as she reassured herself of her statement before paling once more, seeming near to being ill again. 

“They swarmed at the cadet until one of them noticed us running. They followed. He tried to circle back and defend us. That’s when… That’s when they…they shot him. All we could do was…was run. For here.” 

“That's when this happened.” The boy pointed to the wound Vaelah had bandaged. “One screamed. I know he did. I don't know if he got in the way of one of their own arrows or some of the other cadets came after us. If they survived.”

“So we've got an unknown number of people headed in the direction of the first group. Maybe to Pelargir.” Gimaldor summarized. “The city needs to be warned.”

“Unit one as well. And the rest of our group.” Dilgran interjected. “The kids are with them. Vae, I know you won't let me ask you to go back.”

“Absolutely not.” She scorned. “I’m likely to be needed here before this is done.”

“I'll go on my own. I remember the way back. I know how to navigate direction in forests. I'll be able to get out one way or another. These two can come with me. If they are headed this way, you're going to need all the fighters you can get if you have to hold them off when you retreat.” Lisbeth spoke with surprising confidence. Mortal terrors were seemingly surmountable compared to the mystical. Vaelah admired her turn around.

“Absolutely not. They’re on the hunt for these two now. You might escape on your own. These two saw too much. They'd shoot on sight. We are not leaving you unguarded." Gimaldor wouldn’t hear it.

“We'll try to trail after out group, then. Intercept.” Dilgran proposed. “Gim... you’re more skilled overall than me. Need be, I'll bring the civilians back. The rest are going to need you.”

Vaelah reached out to touch her friend's arm. Some would call his offer running away. He heard how he hurt he was realizing the same thing. She hoped when they made it back – if they made it back- his superiors would see the logic he applied.

“Move out. Dilgran, take the lead, I'll cover our backs.” Gimaldor engaged the plan with a nod without argument. At the head, Dilgran encouraged single file to muck up some of the tracks they were making. This was not how she had thought the day would go.