Chapter Text
When Anakin saw Padmé Amidala for the first time, he thought he saw an angel. The young alpha was beautiful and kind and had an aura that made Anakin feel strangely safe. Qui-Gon made him feel safe, too, but it was different. Qui-Gon was a jedi and an alpha; there was calmness and power in him, and he had been through a lot. Padmé didn’t do anything, not really, but Anakin felt like there was something in her. Something strong. Maybe she was an angel, Anakin had thought but he lost that thought when he saw Obi-Wan. If someone was an angel, it was Obi-Wan.
Anakin didn’t know a lot about Jedis but he knew that usually Jedi masters had padawans. That was one thing he had been taught when he was young. If they saw one Jedi, there was another one. Of course Qui-Gon hadn’t said that he was a Jedi master but somehow Anakin felt like he knew that the men was not just someone and he wasn’t surprised when they arrived to the ship and he met Obi-Wan.
Yet, everything about Obi-Wan Kenobi surprised Anakin. That soft voice and warm, steady hand that touched his hand. That tamed but warm and comforting scent of an omega. Anakin hadn’t known that Qui-Gon’s padawan was an omega but suddenly he had understood why Obi-Wan was staying on the ship. Tatooine wasn’t really a place that respected omegas although Obi-Wan carried so much calmness with him. Anakin knew that the omega wasn’t afraid of Tatooine, he talked so calmly and was making plans before their spaceship had left Tatooine but he also saw how the older Jedi had an urge to protect. Anakin didn’t know the omega and he was too young to really understand but somehow he understood. He felt it. The urge.
Anakin hadn’t presented yet. It wasn’t anything strange since humans usually presented when they were around twelve-year-olds, but still he felt that strange urge to protect, to cherish. He had wanted to curl around the softly spoken omega and just keep him close even if he was too young to have those feelings. Clearly Obi-Wan Kenobi was not someone who would need protection from some Tatooine kid who knew everything about building things and nothing about anything else. He was a Jedi. Clearly he was a talented Jedi if he was protecting the queen of Naboo with Qui-Gon.
Anakin wanted to be a Jedi. He wanted to protect people like Qui-Gon did. Like Obi-Wan did. Leaving Tatooine was a first step and somehow Anakin had thought it was the hardest step to take. Yet, everything turned out to be complicated, too complicated. When he had raced, he had had everything in his hands. Now he had nothing. Anakin had had his dream about being a Jedi but Jedi Masters didn’t want him to become one. He was disappointed, and he didn’t know what he would do, but it wasn’t the worst thing. The worst thing was disappointment Obi-Wan was clearly feeling after they left the Jedi council. Even Anakin felt it and he didn’t share a bond with Obi-Wan.
“I’m sorry, master,” Obi-Wan whispered so quietly that Anakin knew that the omega didn’t want him to hear his words. Qui-Gon shook his head and rubbed Obi-Wan’s shoulder. Anakin wanted to go to them and wrap his arms around Obi-Wan but he didn’t have any rights to do anything. All he could do was to watch how Qui-Gon gently laid his hand on Obi-Wan’s nape and squeezed.
“It’s not your fault, young padawan. We both know you’re ready, you’re skilled and you’ll be a great Jedi Master. Be patient, Obi-Wan.”
“I know you wanted him, and you could be a good master for him if I was a knight, not a padawan. I’m too old to be a padawan. If I was a beta, I would be a knight. I’m sorry. You probably didn’t expect this when you took me as your padawan.”
There was so much gentleness on Qui-Gon’s face as he pressed his forehead against Obi-Wan’s, and Anakin wanted to growl and push himself in between them. He barely knew Obi-Wan but a weird need was forming inside of him.
“Be patient. Your omegahood is not a thing that will slow you down, and you shouldn’t believe so. It’s a strength and it will carry you through hard times ahead. There are and there always will be people who will underestimate you because of it but I wouldn’t have taken you as my padawan if I had thought it as something that makes you weaker.”
Anakin wanted to say something but it was neither the right time nor place to speak. He wanted to tell Obi-Wan that he didn’t blame the omega. He could be someone else’s padawan and be happy. Just getting a chance to be close the Obi-Wan could make him happy even if Qui-Gon weren’t his master. But everything happened so quickly, and they were traveling to Naboo before Anakin had an opportunity to talk with the omega. Padmé was sitting next to him but her presence wasn’t enough to calm Anakin’s racing heart.
“Have you met an omega before? I’ve noticed you looking at him a lot,” Padmé asked. She kept his voice low, and Anakin couldn’t hear any judgment in her voice but still he felt like he had been caught doing something wrong. He shook his head because no, he hadn’t. He had heard stories how there were omegas in Tatooine but they were slaves and usually not the ones that worked outside of their owner’s house.
“Don’t be ashamed. It’s just natural if you feel the pull. In my home, Naboo, there’s many omegas in high positions because they have this inexplicable calmness around them, but many other nations treat them more like they’re threats. They have almost too much control of themselves and everything around them. They can forge stronger bonds than anybody else. They say that the bond between omega mother and their child is the strongest bond in this universe and many worlds have been burned down because of the wrath of hurt oma. So, their calmness can soothe the oceans and storms but their wrath creates the hurricanes. But anyway, Ani, you’ve gone through a lot in a short time so it’s normal to crave calmness,” Padmé told him. They both glanced towards Obi-Wan who seemed to be as calm and collected as earlier, like he hadn’t been hurt at all by his masters. Yet, Anakin couldn’t forget the sadness the omega had clearly felt and the heaviness in his sighs.
“Jedis didn’t seem to believe in him,” Anakin told her. He whispered the words like it was a secret and he wasn’t sure if he had a right to talk about it.
“I don’t really understand many things Jedis do but I might not be the one to judge Jedis’ ways to live. It’s something they have chosen like I have chosen my life. They do leave a lot behind when they choose to be Jedis, like they don’t like bonds unless it’s between the knight or master and the padawan, as far as I know. I’ve heard that they don’t have rights to bond like mates,” Padmé answered. Anakin barely listened to her since Obi-Wan had lifted his gaze like he knew he was studied by the two of them.
“Sounds stupid,” Anakin said. He felt something which felt like anger but also worry. “Mom said that the bond between two mates is a treasure and it should be cherished. She always said that if I ever find someone who is my mate, it’s a blessing from the force.”
“Your mother is clearly a good and wise woman and you’re a good kid. I do agree that bonds should be nurtured, not pushed down, but you must understand that if you want to be a Jedi, you might have to make some sacrifices. When I decided to pursue politics and help the queen, I made many sacrifices.” Padmé smiled as her gentle but steady eyes met Anakin’s eyes. She was young, even Anakin could see it, but she didn’t act like a youngster.
'Is it worth it? Making sacrifices and not getting what you want just because of rules?’ Anakin wanted to ask but he didn’t, going back to observing Obi-Wan and wanting to absorb his calmness like the omega was his new sun. The omega smiled, gently, like he had just accepted that Anakin was there now.