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'Tony, come to bed!' Loki says, barely stopping himself from chuckling. Normally Tony would join him instantly, eager to find out what sexual fantasy Loki wants to fulfill this time.
Unfortunately, sex is currently out of the question, due to Loki's paternal duties. Half of his hellish offspring invaded Tony's tower, with a clear intent to take away his sanity, ruin all of his prized possessions and separate Loki from him. Fenrir and Jormungand have no trouble with openly showing how little they care about their future stepfather. They bare their teeth, or fangs, at him on a daily basis. Fenrir growls and gnaws at Tony's legs. Jormungand casually attempts murder by wrapping his massive body around Tony. Loki only laughs and occasionally remarks that they just want to play. Play what? Homicide? Body mutilation? Asphyxiation?
The two monsters joyfully wreak havoc on Tony's place, leaving everything breakable broken. Tony's favourite rug is suspiciously smelly and wet, every piece of furniture is Fenrir's scratching post. To make things worse, Loki brings live mice and other small animals to feed his 'little boys'. They devour their meal, staring at Tony threateningly, letting him know who is next.
Dealing with two non-housetrained beasts could be much less stressful, if only Tony had a break, a quiet, peaceful night with Loki. But no, according to Loki, every time he's reunited with his huge sons, they all sleep in one bed, cuddling and squeezing the life out of one another. Tony is certain that the lying trickster is just testing his endurance and dedication. Tony still doesn't like any of his stepchildren, but he's not going to give up and let them win.
So every night he stays up as long as he can and eventually comes to the bedroom to see his bed occupied by a rabies-infected wolf and a serpent that is destined to kill Thor. Loki lies on his side, hugging an armful of Jormungand while Fenrir finds his place on top of Loki's feet. Tony has no other choice but to curl up on the tiny free spot and stay awake to move when Fenrir decides to bite his foot. Jormungand glares at him from time to time and hisses whenever Tony's on the verge of falling asleep. Tony survives on one-two hours of sleep and always have nightmares about being eaten alive.
When they are all in one bed, struggling to find a comfortable position in the sea of legs and paws, Tony glances at Loki in the dim moonlight. Loki gently strokes both of his hideous sons, mutters something affectionate to them and seems happier and more at peace than ever. Loki loves having murderous, loyal minions that just happen to be of his blood, true, yet he is not only a diabolical villain but also a doting father. He is filled with love and devotion for his children and appreciates every moment they can spend together.
Bearing that in mind, Tony uses every ounce of his strength not to snap and doesn't say what he really thinks of Fenrir and Jormungand. They provoke him and want to scare him away from their parent, that's obvious. To their surprise, Tony has learnt to accept that he's not necessarily the one whom Loki loves most, that Loki's children, cruel, blood-thirsty and horrifying, come first. So he bites his tongue every time he wants to refer to Fenrir as a bad doggy and doesn't tell Jormungand that he'll end up as a purse or in a soup. Loki may pretend he could not care less about other people's opinion about his boys, but Tony knows that deep inside, Loki wants his unusual brood to be accepted with all of their numerous flaws, in spite of their inhuman form- something that he craved for himself for centuries. Loki claims obstinately that he doesn't want normal, dull pink babies and only Tony is able to decipher that code. 'I wish my children were just like everyone else and didn't know how I felt all my life- rejected, despised, forced to hate myself.' Behind his back, Tony spoke with Frigga to figure out the chances of having a human-looking baby with Loki. Frigga is convinced that the hypothetical little Stark would not have hooves or a tail, that's very promising.
That is a problem for another day, though. Tony lifts his head off the pillow to see if the deadly serpent is asleep and once he's sure he will not be attacked any time soon, he touches Loki's cheek, softly, not wanting to wake him. Loki needn't have worried, they can be a family. A weird, not always supportive or fully functional family. Handling jealousy, assassination attempts and wearing shoes all the time to avoid stepping into 'an accident' isn't actually that difficult. A rare smile on Loki's face reminds Tony why he bothers with two troublesome creatures and it's worth it.
