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Jim had done something foolhardy again.
Leonard didn't know what and he didn't know where, but as soon as he crossed the threshold, he damn well knew it had happened. Almost thirty years of knowing the man had given him an almost preternatural ability to sense when Jim had been up to one of his hare-brained antics again and that sense was currently blaring a red alert warning impossible to ignore.
A quick look to his right (and up, because the hobgoblin was a tall bastard) told him that Spock had also noticed. The man's eyebrow was already halfway up his forehead.
"Alright, what did you do?" Leonard thrust his suitcase at Spock and took his jacket off, throwing it haphazardly onto the coat rack. Without a pause he pushed his sleeves up, getting ready for whatever disaster awaited them.
"Why do you assume I did something?" Jim answered quickly. Too quickly. Leonard threw a venomous glare in his direction, but the other man only lifted his arms, palms up, doing his best to look innocent but mostly failing.
"That was not a denial, Jim," Spock loyally added. He put Leonard’s suitcase by the low table and took off his own jacket, folding it neatly and storing it in its place. Leonard huffed, ignoring the subtle reproach. He was only dealing with one headache at the same time.
"Gentlemen, this is totally uncalled for," Jim tried. Ha. His Captain's Voice hadn't worked on Leonard when they were in the same chain of command, it sure wasn't going to save their idiot husband now.
"Spock and I were out of town for a week. A week! There better not be another murderous robot in the backyard or I swear to all that's holy—" Leonard's raised voice drowned Jim's mumbled reply. He narrowed his eyes. "What did you just say?"
"Not a robot," Jim admitted, louder this time. As if he was deliberately trying to dig his own grave, he darted a glance towards the corridor adjacent to the room.
"Good Lord!" Leonard exclaimed, thrusting his arms up in exasperation. "What is it then? A hologram out of control? A bacteria the size of a horse? Another abducted heir to the Holy Rings of Betazed?"
"You're blowing things out of proportion,” Jim said, in that reasonable tone of voice that got all of Leonard’s hackles up. Perhaps sensing his precarious mood, Jim continued, “you know I was scheduled to give a lecture to the recent Security graduates who have enlisted planetside, and while I was there, Headquarters got a distress call—”
“...If you are trying to be reassuring you are failing. Catastrophically,” Leonard growled. He was tempted to rush inside for the tricorder he kept in the emergency kit, but since Jim was standing outright, he was going to let it go in favor of getting answers.
Before Jim could try to dig himself out of the hole, Spock made a soft sound of realization. Their t’hy’la bond fluttered, letting out a soft chime that reverberated in the space between them. Leonard whipped around, bracing himself.
However, Spock stayed still. Then, slowly, he closed his eyes and pressed two fingers against his temple. After a moment he tilted his head, obviously listening to whatever had made the bond react. Leonard's adrenaline kicked up a notch; the last thing they needed was mind-whammery going on as well.
Whatever he was picking up on was clearly unexpected. Spock’s right eyebrow went all the way up, followed quickly by the other. Then he ignored the two humans still in the foyer and strode into the house.
"I should have known,” Jim grumbled, turning to go into their home after him. Under his breath he added, “Thank you for ruining the surprise, Nesh-kur."
Starting to have a horrible suspicion that he wished fervently would be wrong, Leonard hurried to follow his partners, with his mind still running frantically through the options for whatever awaited him.
At least Spock hadn’t gone far. He was crouching in the middle of the living room, extending a hand towards a big… something behind the coffee table. Whatever it was made a soft keening noise, sniffing in the Vulcan's direction and shaking its fur.
Leonard inched around the sofa, trying to get a better look. The animal immediately turned and growled. He took a step back as obviously as he could, observing the skittish creature. It only came up to his knee, with cream-coloured fur except for its paws and the tips of its ears, which were a deep black.
That, he could have dealt with. What gave him pause was the vaguely bear-like head, complete with two tiny fangs protruding from its mouth.
“Is that what I think it is?” he croaked, unable to tear his eyes away from the sharp rows of teeth.
“She’s a sehlat,” Spock agreed softly, running his hand gently down the beastie’s head, who melted under his touch, cautiously taking a step forward and bumping her snout against his middle. “A very young member of the species, as well,” he clarified, and if an animal that size was supposed to be a baby…
Leonard whirled around, glaring daggers at Jim, who had preemptively lifted his arms in surrender as he explained.
“As I was saying, I offered to help and… the distress call may have led to an illegal animal trafficking ring operating out of Utopia Planitia. Luckily we found the ringleaders and most of the animals are being returned to their natural habitats as we speak.”
The sehlat yipped as if to corroborate the story. Leonard pursed his lips and jabbed his finger at her in wordless fury.
“We tried!” Jim said indignantly, “She was already on the transporter pad for the V’Liat, but she refused to go! She almost took the technician’s hand off, and she wouldn't stop following me the whole time I was there, what was I supposed to do?”
"It's a sehlat, not a cat!" Leonard exploded. "Those beasties grow six-inch fangs!"
"I couldn't just abandon her, Bones! What was I supposed to do, tie her down to the transporter pad?"
“It is unlikely you would have been able to do so, Jim,” Spock interceded behind Leonard’s back. "Sehlats are relentless trackers. You would not have been able to subdue her for long enough, once she decided you were hers."
Leonard stiffened, recognizing that tone of voice. It was the coolly neutral and even, ‘I am hiding a strong emotional response right now’ tone. Leonard jerkily turned around, only to have his worst fears confirmed: the sehlat’s head was now resting fully on Spock’s folded legs, and he was gently scratching her behind the ears, focusing all of his attention on the creature.
Damn. Spock was already enamored with the little monster, which meant that Leonard wasn't going to win this one. Jim alone, he could have handled; but Spock was exuding a quiet sort of joy that was obvious to any who knew how to look and Bones would never be able to take this away from him.
He sighed, admitting defeat. “Fine, you know what? Fine. She can stay. We’ll make it work.”
Even before he was done speaking, he saw Jim beaming widely at him. Most importantly, he felt a warm caress at the back of his mind, a soft mental touch filled with gratitude and the sensation of an old hurt finally getting a chance to heal properly.
Leonard crossed his arms, flustered, and glowered at every single occupant of the room, human and Vulcan. "But I'm not walking her out or cleaning after her. And she better not chew on my good shoes!"
“Of course not,” Jim promised, sounding far too happy about his capitulation.
Before Leonard could formulate a sufficiently scathing response, Spock tilted his head to the side again. “Doctor, Nesh-kur has informed me that Jim was briefly captured and threatened during her rescue— a check-up may be in order.”
Jim’s eyes widened in horror. Leonard, however, finally smiled. A staunch ally who would snitch on their husband when he inevitably got up to something stupid again was definitely a welcome addition to their little family.
“What do you know? I think she and I will become good friends after all.”