Work Text:
Chuuya had just listened to Albatross’s last words. He’d been too late to save his friends.
The lifeless body he was still holding in his arms was getting colder. Blood had gotten on his clothes from holding the lifeless body. He just wanted to hug him, and hear his teasing remarks again. Even the parties and their noise would be welcome over losing more friends.
Yet, as he looked around the room, all he saw was more dead friends. It hurt, and Chuuya wished that he knew why they had to die. The butchered, bloodied bodies had him beyond upset, and he started sobbing.
Without a care for how much blood got on his clothes, Chuuya held Albatross. He didn’t want to move to one of the others just to have all the small details that can only be seen up close to be ingraining into his mind. Having the memories of one friends’ corpse would be bad enough.
So, he curled around the body, like he was protecting him from a danger. Despite the fact that he was far too late to protect any of them. Footsteps were heard from the entrance, but Chuuya ignored it.
He was crying uncontrollably, and wishing his friends would come back. Chuuya was aware he was reacting like a child, which he technically still was, as often as he tried to act like an adult. However, he wasn’t going to stop sobbing, or hugging the body, even as Adam approached him.
The android didn’t understand why Chuuya was so hysterical. He knew loss of life was upsetting for humans, but he didn’t get why it was making the teen cry so much. A hand was placed on his shoulder to get his attention.
“W-what do you want?” Chuuya’s cracked and broke as he spoke.
“We should go, Verlaine might return,” Adam was calm, despite the gory scene surrounding him.
Curling up more, he didn’t move, “I can’t leave them.”
That confused the android, as he saw it as easy to leave, “They are dead, so there is no reason to stay here.”
“I’m not leaving! I-I can’t,” Chuuya got quiet near the end, still hugging Albatross’s corpse.
The blood all over his clothes was sticky, and it felt uncomfortable as it cooled and dried. Chuuya didn’t like knowing how cold his friend was, but he didn’t feel like he could just leave him there. It felt like he was running away, which he never wanted to do to them. The Flags had become his new family after the betrayal from the Sheep. It was just too much for him.
—
It took a while before Adam convinced Chuuya to leave, and the teen headed straight to his apartment. He wanted to clean the blood off himself, and pass out on his bed. So much had happened in the course of a couple of hours, and he just wanted a break.
Stepping into the bathroom, he closed the door and then turned to look at himself in the mirror. Tear tracks were still visible on his face, and there was blood caked into some of his hair. His clothes were completely coated in blood, most of which was Albatross’s.
Chuuya started to peel the bloody clothes off, and found that the blood had soaked through. It had gotten on his skin, and dried there. Which meant he’d have to do some scrubbing to clean it all off.
Throwing the last of the clothes on the floor, Chuuya got in the shower, turning the hot water on with only a little bit of cold. It burned his skin slightly, but he preferred the heat to the cold feeling he’d had to deal with all day. So, he grabbed a cloth and began scrubbing.
At first, he lightly rubbed at the spots where the blood was. Then, he slowly became rougher, scrubbing until his skin hurt, and there wasn’t a trace of blood left. His whole body received that treatment, and the part of his hair at the bottom where the blood got in it was just cut off. Chuuya didn’t have it in him to spend however much time it would take to get the blood that soaked into his hair out.
Even when he got out, he dried himself with the same harsh treatment. Leaving his skin raw and sore, but he felt like he may have been able to clean all the blood from his skin. Finally going to get into pajamas for the night.
—
Chuuya hadn’t gotten a break the next day, and now he was in a lab.
N was showing him another version of himself, and he was questioning his humanity more than ever before. The other boy was released from the container he was in, and Chuuya held him in his arms as he began to melt away. It scared him, and he felt the feeling of failure at saving another person.
The other teen’s blood and bodily fluids got all over his clothes, and he stared down at the small skeleton in his arms. He didn’t deserve to go out that way, and Chuuya felt himself tear up again. Trying to hold back the tears as N smiled at him.
Everything was far too much, and Chuuya felt overwhelmed.
He was just a sixteen-year-old, but he’d been through too much in the course of a couple of days. There wasn’t even a chance to grieve the loss of his friends before he was forced to confront their killer. Then, dragged along to learn how to face off against their killer, and coming face to face with an identical version of himself.
The differences were that he wasn’t covered in scars from a life of betrayals, and hurt. He didn’t have to feel because he died in Chuuya’s arms. It was then, that he hit his limits, but knew that he still had a lot left to do.
Maybe someday he could grieve for those he lost, but today he has to face the evil of the world head on.