Work Text:
“Mafuyu, happy birthday.”
Her mother handed her the gift, her eyes, while smiling, seemed cold and empty.
Regardless, Mafuyu smiled. “Thank you, Mom.” She said, voice dripping with fake sweetness, the corners of her lips upturned.
Just like all the years before, she opened the gift, trying to make her eyes glitter and lean more onto the edge of her seat so it looked like she was actually interested in whatever was inside.
She opened the lid, and took a look at the contents.
A medical book.
The book showed a picture of a doctor, and from that, she knew that it was a book her mother got to help her with studying for medical school.
“How do you like it?” Her mother asked, eyes looking somehow even more cold. “I knew it would help you become a doctor, so it makes the perfect gift for you, no?”
The “no” almost sounded like a test. Of whether Mafuyu was still a good girl, that she had to say yes or her mother would be displeased.
Therefore, swallowing the lump in her throat that came from looking at the doctor on the cover page, she smiled. “It’s amazing, Mom! Thank you so much.”
Make your voice sound excited. Make it look like you love it.
Make it look like you still want to be a doctor.
“I’m glad, then,” she said, smiling, before a wistful expression crossed her face. “Eighteen years, huh… our little Mafuyu is all grown up.”
She unconsciously clenched her fists, but forced out a laugh. “Yeah, feels like just yesterday it was my 11th birthday.”
It did. Because that was the last good birthday she had.
“Study hard for the medical entrance exam, Mafuyu.”
Her breath hitched, and she very nearly dropped her smile.
She wouldn’t dare.
“Yes,” she said, her own voice sounding too foreign to her ears for her liking. “I should be going to school now.” I can’t stay here any longer.
Her mother nodded. “I’ll take the book to your room for you. Happy birthday again.”
She walked up the stairs with the book, and Mafuyu’s lungs felt slightly better. Or at least it didn’t feel like they were being crushed.
She dashed out the door, and started walking to school.
———
Mafuyu wasn’t very fond of birthdays.
They always consisted of people wishing her only out of politeness, food she could barely taste, and her mother basically deciding the entire day for her.
Her birthday had been enjoyable when she was a child. When her mother let her have some freedom, when she could taste the sweetness of the cake, when she did the things that brought her happiness.
But now, it was always more of an ordeal, and it got harder to fake smile than usual.
Surely today wouldn’t have been any different, right?
So unlike last year, she didn’t hold out any hope that it would feel any better than a normal day. Honestly, maybe she would have preferred a normal day.
“Asahina-san, happy birthday!” A senpai who’s name she hadn’t bothered to memorize said to her.
“Thank you very much!” She smiled.
They walked away, and she let her smile drop.
First she had math class, so she walked into the classroom as usual, laughing and nodding her way through the barrage of birthday wishes that came from her classmates.
It’s fine. The day will be over soon.
Bearing that thought in mind, she took out her pencil and began to take notes as always.
———
Class had been quite uneventful, other than everyone wishing her a happy birthday, and having to respond to them one by one. None had brought her gifts, but she didn’t really mind either way.
The rest of the school day had gone on too, pretty much the same. Honestly, she just wanted to go home and get on Nightcord.
“Asahina-senpaiiiii!”
She recognized that voice. Emu Otori came running over to her, clearly not paying attention to the “no running in the hall” policy. Mafuyu would have reminded her, but she didn’t have the energy, so she just put on a smile.
“Happy birth-Wondahoi!!” She threw her arms up, smiling much wider than usual.
On her birthday, Honami had remarked that Emu was even more excited than she was. Mafuyu could see that now.
“Thank you, Otori-san,” she laughed gently. Emu’s face seemed to scrunch up slightly, though she wasn’t sure whether it was out of fear or disappointment. Maybe both.
Her cheeks puffed, and she moved closer.
“Otori-san?” She questioned.
“Asahina-senpai.” She started, more serious than before, although it almost looked comical.
And suddenly, she broke into an even more comical face, and she stuck her tongue out, before putting her hands up on her head and smiling.
“Rabbit face!” She said, tongue still stuck out.
Her voice was muffled slightly by her tongue, and Mafuyu couldn’t help but think that if pink rabbits existed, they’d look exactly like her.
“Hehe, are you making a funny face, Otori-san?”
She laughed gently, and although it was coated by fake sweetness, it seemed somewhat airier. Not just that, but more familiar to her own ears. She didn’t quite understand why, however.
Emu’s eyes seemed to light up, and her smile grew wider than before, which Mafuyu thought wasn’t even possible. “Yep!” She put her hands down and her tongue back in her mouth.
She seemed to mutter something under her breath excitedly, but she couldn’t hear. She didn’t have time to ask, however, before she heard a voice call for her.
“Mafuyu-chan! It’s time for archery!”
One of her classmates. “One second!” She called to her, who nodded and went down the hall. Mafuyu turned back to Emu.
“I have to go now, then,” she said. “See you!”
“Yep, wonda-bye!” Emu laughed once again, before turning away. “Happy birthday, Asahina-senpai!”
Time for archery, then. She had almost forgotten about that.
“Oh, one more thing!”
Emu turned back to look at her, before her expression turned soft.
“I hope you find what you want to do the most someday!”
And with that, she was off, leaving Mafuyu there with a strange feeling in her chest.
———
“Wow, as expected of Asahina-san!”
A member smiled as Mafuyu hit the target, arrow piercing through flawlessly. As always, she accepted the compliment humbly, with a fake smile.
“Let’s wrap it up from here,” she heard the president say, lowering her bow. “Good work, everyone.”
Mafuyu and the others all put their bows to the side, some of them sighing in relief and laughing with their friends. She did none of that, however, she just started to walk away.
“Asahina-san!”
A fellow classmate called to her, and she stopped in her tracks and put on a smile.
“Hi there,” she placed her hands by her sides. “Good work today.”
“You too!” The classmate said. “Happy birthday, by the way!”
She had remembered. Somehow, despite feeling a sense of lightness when Emu wished her, she didn’t feel anything.
“Thank you!” She said, even so. She wanted to walk away, but the classmate kept talking.
“Eighteen, huh…” sounding too similar to the way her mother said it for her own liking. “You’re going to be a third year soon!”
“Ahaha, yeah!” She said. “Time really does fly.”
“Speaking of which, aren’t you going to be a doctor?”
Her smile froze on her face.
“That’s so cool!” She gushed, clearly oblivious to the way Mafuyu’s fists clenched. “It suits you quite well, I’m sure that you’ll do great in the entrance exam.”
It doesn’t suit me at all.
“You think so?” Mafuyu forced out. “Thank you. I’ll do my best.”
Her voice sounded emptier than before, so she cleared her throat and put her bow away. “Well, I’ll see you soon.”
She waved to her classmate, and walked back once again.
Somehow, it was cold.
———
The snow was falling outside the school.
The sight honestly was somewhat calming, if it weren’t for the cold air biting at her skin.
Mafuyu still couldn’t get those words out of her head, though. She had been told countless times that being a doctor suited her and that her, or in truth, her mother’s choice was perfect. But being told that on her 18th birthday, somehow made it more real. Made her truly realize that her mother, and the rest of society, was asking her to become something she never wanted to become.
She didn’t even know what she did want to become. But it wasn’t a doctor.
That classmate hadn’t even meant any harm, and yet her heart still ached.
Whatever. The sooner she logged onto Nightcord, the sooner she’d feel some peace, and then the day would be over.
“Asahina-san?”
This voice felt warmer than her classmate’s, and she recognized the soft, kind tone immediately. Shizuku Hinomori.
“Ah, Hinomori-san,” she greeted her, putting on a smile once again. “Hello.”
She seemed slightly winded, but she smiled at the sight of seeing her, and she could’ve sworn her eyes lit up.
“Ah, there you are…” she said, moving closer to her. “I was looking for you.”
“Looking for me?” Mafuyu questioned, before Shizuku took out a small box.
“Happy birthday, Asahina-san!”
A birthday gift, then. It was purple with a blue ribbon, so she must have matched their colors together. As expected of Shizuku to think of that.
It was less tense opening the box than when her mother gave it to her, but she didn’t want to think about that at the moment.
She took off the lid and examined the contents.
A necklace.
A pretty, well-made necklace with a snow pendant, and a purple chain. The pendant was coated in glitter, and it felt somehow familiar.
The air biting at her cheeks somehow felt less cold.
“Do you like it?” She asked, smiling gently.
“Yes, it’s very pretty,” she said, putting it on. “Thank you, Hinomori-san.”
Again, her voice seemed lighter, and it didn’t take as much energy to smile. Did that count as genuinely liking it?
“I’m glad…” she said, blushing. “You know…”
“That day, when we walked home together in the snow, I really enjoyed it,” she started, cheeks gaining color with every word. “So when I saw this necklace, it reminded me of you.”
Shizuku’s face was very red, and Mafuyu felt some semblance of warmth where the pendant was placed. Not just that, but the crushing feeling from her classmate’s words had gone away slightly.
“I really appreciate it,” she said. She didn’t quite know what to say other than the fact that she liked it, but she seemed happy regardless.
Without warning, she pulled Mafuyu into a hug, burying her face in her shoulder.
It was slightly weird. When she hugged people outside her circle members, it didn’t feel like much. When her mother hugged her, she even felt uncomfortable, like coils up her back.
But this felt warm. The skinship was somewhat comforting, and she felt lighter as she returned the hug. It almost felt like when she would cuddle Kanade.
“Asahina-san?” Shizuku asked.
“Yes?” Mafuyu broke apart and met her eyes.
“You’re a very precious friend to me, so…” she started, before breaking into a gentle smile. “I hope that we can always get along.”
“And, if there’s anything you need, I’ll always be here!”
Mafuyu had a feeling that she was referring to that day when they had that archery match and walked home together.
“Thank you, Hinomori-san. Same here.”
She couldn’t tell her. She couldn’t, but the feeling in her chest as she smiled was similar to when she first heard Kanade’s song that made her smile.
Shizuku’s eyes lit up again, and her cheeks gained color, before she looked at the sky. “Ah, I should be going now…” she said.
“Alright, see you tomorrow.” Mafuyu said, as she touched the pendant on her chest.
“Happy birthday again!” She said, smiling before walking away.
That strange feeling from earlier was back again.
But as she set for home, her feet didn’t ache.
———
Her mother wasn’t around when she got home.
She had left a sticky note on the fridge saying she had gone out to get some groceries, and that there was food set out.
So she simply sat in her room, studying. The empty house felt strangely comforting for some reason.
She hadn’t bothered to open the book that her mother had gotten her yet, instead focusing on the work from today. The thought of it made her feel off.
She continued to study, until her hand started hurting and she decided to take a break.
Conveniently, just at that moment she got a notification on her computer, from Nightcord. It wasn’t 25:00 yet, though.
k: can you come to sekai?
Probably something to do with her birthday, then. She was tired, but at the same time she wanted to see Kanade and the others.
yuki: sure
Her mother shouldn’t have been back for a while. So she took out her phone, and pressed play on Composing the Future.
———
Surprisingly, when she got to Sekai, only Kanade was there. There were tables and plates with cake and pie set out, but it seemed like the others hadn’t arrived yet.
Still, her heart calmed at the presence of Kanade, and she walked over to her.
“Ah, Mafuyu,” she greeted, stepping close and kissing her cheek. “Happy birthday.”
Mafuyu hummed, skin tingling where Kanade kissed. For a moment, the aching in her hand eased, and she felt some energy get restored.
“Where are the others?” She asked.
“They’ll be here soon,” she said. “But, I wanted to give you something first.”
Her cheeks were slightly red, and she looked at her. “It’s a melody.”
Just a few seconds after she said that, a melody started playing through the air.
It felt warm, but different somehow than all the other songs. It gave Mafuyu a sense of peace, happiness, and warmth, and it felt somewhat similar to the good birthdays she had.
She hadn’t even realized when the corners of her lips upturned.
“How was it?” Kanade asked once it ended, though she seemingly already knew the answer from the way she was smiling gently.
“It felt… nice.” Mafuyu said, she couldn’t find much else to describe it. “I liked it.”
Her eyes lit up, and her smile grew. “I’m glad.”
Then, she stepped forward and wrapped her arms around her, gentle and soft as always. Mafuyu did the same, a motion she had done many times, but it felt warmer now. She pressed a kiss into her hair.
They broke apart, and just as they did, they saw a familiar burst of triangles, and Ena and Mizuki came into view.
Miku came out as well, from wherever she was before, a gentle smile on her face.
“Mafuyuuuuuu!” Mizuki came running, catching both Mafuyu and Kanade in a hug. “Happy birthday!”
Kanade winced in surprise slightly, but returned the hug, while Mafuyu put a hand on their back.
“Geez, I get you’re excited, but could you lower your voice…” Ena walked over, and Mizuki broke the hug to look at her.
“Happy birthday as well, though, Mafuyu.” She smiled. Mafuyu hummed once again, and her chest felt lighter.
“Which first? Eating cake or presents?” Miku asked, moving closer to Ena’s side.
“Cake! Definitely cake!” Mizuki said.
“Alright,” Kanade said. “Let’s all cut it, okay?”
“Sure.” Mafuyu looked at her.
The crushing feeling she got from earlier seemed to have been gone as they walked over to the nicely decorated cake.
Mafuyu didn’t know if this had been a good birthday.
But this was the first year in over seven, that she had genuinely smiled on her birthday.
And that was enough.