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His father’s nails dug into his arm as Eren struggled against his hold. Eren wanted to scream as he saw his father pull out a needle from an ornate wooden box, filling it with some sort of liquid.
“Stop! No- I don’t wanna! I don’t want you to touch me again!” Eren cried, having gotten brief flashbacks to when this had happened before. “This is just going to hurt for a second, boy. Then I’ll never have to touch you again” His father promised, and Eren faltered in his struggle for a moment at the thought.
His father took that as his chance, and soon a needle was piercing his arm and he was flailing around again. It was gone as quick as it came though, and the sedative worked quickly.
Eren couldn’t even open his mouth to scream as his father unbuckled his belt and started-
“STOP DAD, PLEASE!” Eren burst out, falling out of his bed onto cold stone. Oh, right, he was with the Levi Squad in a castle dungeon because he was apparently a titan. Right. He wasn’t in the forest with his dad, his dad is dead. Right .
He tried to wrench himself off of the floor and out of the tangle of blankets suffocating him, but he shook and struggled before his muscles gave out and he fell back onto the ground. His nose was bleeding, he noticed, and he wasn’t sure if it was from Hange’s experiments or if it was from falling face flat against hard stone.
“What are you doing on the floor, brat?” Captain Levi was here, great . “N-Nothing, sir! I just, mh.. Had a nightmare, sir..” Eren sighed, not bothering to try and get up again. He’d just embarrass himself even more.
“Yes, I noticed. Your screams are managing to unsettle even Mike” Levi commented, “What’s wrong?” He asked rather blatantly. “What do you mean?” Eren asked, motivation to stand up again sparking through him with his confusion. “I thought you were in the top ten of your class, were you not? How do you not understand a simple question like that?” The captain scoffed.
“I-I- It’s just- … I’m fine, sir, I swear! I’ve been having nightmares for years now, I'm just used to having Armin or Mikasa there I guess" Eren explained as he dragged himself back into bed.
He didn’t mention that he had them there because he tended to drop after nightmares and had too young of a headspace to take care of himself. And he definitely didn’t mention that his nightmares were getting worse now that his main coping mechanism was cut off from him.
(He found himself close to slipping more and more often while around Levi or Hange, but he desperately ignored the need to drop and cuddle and get forehead kisses- he didn’t need to drop. He didn’t!)
"I’ll devise a schedule so you can have someone down here to wake you up from now on, then” Levi spoke without hesitation. It was like he’d already thought of the idea and was waiting for the perfect opportunity to suggest it.
“Wh-what? No, you don’t have to do that-” Eren stuttered, but Levi kept a stern expression, not faltering for a second. “You’re bleeding , Eren. Because of one of your nightmares. I need you in perfect health, and if watching over you while you sleep is necessary to achieve that, I will do it” The words were strangely comforting for Eren.
“I’ll take your silence as agreement. Now, get up, Jaeger. I think Hange wanted to retry that well experiment” Levi continued as he unlocked Eren’s cell.
That night, Hange joined him in the cellar. They relayed apologies from Levi- apparently he wanted to take the first shift since he’d been the one to suggest it but he had a meeting with Erwin and couldn’t spare the time.
She brought a cot with her, and a thick book, asking if he wanted her to read to him.
Eren knew that he should have said no to the offer. He knew someone reading to him while he was in this exhausted state would probably force him to drop, but he couldn’t bring himself to decline. It wasn't the same as Mikasa singing to him in her mother's language, or Armin humming while he played with his hair, but it was enough to send Eren careening into his headspace.
He curled up into his bed, mindful of the chains around his wrists, and cradled his pillow. He smiled, pretending the plush mass in his arms was Armin. (No matter how many times Reiner made fun of them, he would never feel embarrassed about cuddling the shorter boy.)
Despite the sheer amount of nightmares caused by the stress of being ‘humanity’s only hope’- or whatever Commander Erwin had said- Eren fell asleep easily. It was probably due to Hange reading quietly next to his cell, but he felt a sense of comfort and safety that he hadn’t experienced since long before his mom died.
It was only an hour after that he had the same nightmare he had almost every night, though. Hange was almost asleep herself, but was broken out of her half-conscious state immediately after hearing Eren scream.
She rushed for the keys to his cell and shook him awake as quickly as she could. After the many nights where she had shaken Levi or Erwin awake from their own bad dreams, she expected Eren to slap or punch her upon waking. That’s why she flinched away from the boy when he jumped forward.
However, instead of attacking them, Eren simply latched onto Hange like baby koalas cling to their mother. It surprised the scientist, sure, but they didn’t mind too much. It was better than getting punched in the face, after all.
“Mhu-Mhu-Mooom- he won’t stop, why won’t he stop?” Eren hiccuped and sobbed as he cried into Hange’s chest. She didn’t question the choice of words, and honestly she didn’t mind being called mom.
“Who? What’s he doing, sweetie?” Hange asked, running their fingers through his hair in an attempt to soothe him. He hiccuped again as tears continued to run down his face, “It’s d-dad, he keeps.. touching me, i-in the bad places!”
Hange tried not to tense up and tried not to show any outward reaction that might make the situation worse for Eren. Though, honestly, how could this get any worse?
Levi had warned her about his suspicions, that the father, Grisha Jaeger, had probably abused Eren physically. Levi Ackerman was known for many things, but not for being wrong. Ever. Hange could count this as the first time he was, because this was much worse than physical abuse.
“I’m sorry, sweetheart, I’m sorry. He can’t get you here, I swear, okay? You’re safe, you’re safe” She rocked Eren back and forth lightly, further soothing the boy. His sobs and choppy breathing eventually evened out, and he let himself relax against Hange, sighing softly as he relished in the physical contact.
“How are you feeling, Eren?” They asked, pulling back from the hug a bit to look Eren in the eyes, brushing away a few tears. “‘M tired..” Eren murmured, eyelids drooping a bit as he struggled to keep his head up. “Go back to sleep then, I won’t let him touch you while you dream” Hange promised.
“Okay, .. thank you, momma” Eren whispered before promptly passing out almost seconds later- he really was exhausted.
Hange set him back down into bed, watching him curl back up around his pillow. They sighed, this was going to be a long night…
.
.
.
The next morning, Eren woke up already on the verge of slipping. He was like that the entire day, making him very noticeably distracted most of the day. He could hardly get through training with Levi- his mind wandering to thinking about how warm his hugs would be- let alone Hange’s experiments.
All he could think about was falling asleep in their arms after they woke him up from his nightmare, and how the little part of his brain just wanted momma to hold him again.
Eren could tell everyone knew something was off with him, but he ignored it as much as he could. The concerned glances were starting to grate on his nerves, though. Part of him wanted to scream and tell them to stop looking at him and the other, younger part of him wanted to give into their concerned looks and just cuddle.
He couldn’t do either of those things though. He could simply bear it.
That night, Levi was the one to bring down a small cot and some blankets. He didn’t greet Eren, simply looked at him before setting up his bed for the night. “Do you want to talk about your nightmares?” Levi asked as he locked iron cuffs around Eren’s wrists.
Eren wanted to say yes, wanted to vent about every little thing that was tormenting him while he was unconscious. He wanted one person, just one person to see how bad his father was rather than praise him for saving lives as a doctor.
But he didn’t want Levi to see how weak he was. How weak he’d been back then, letting his father drag him to the forest every. single. time. He couldn’t bear it if Levi saw the true Eren, the weak little runt of the pack that couldn’t stop his dad from touching him in all the places a father shouldn’t be touching.
“No, sorry captain” Eren said, shaking his head. Levi sighed, looking Eren in the eyes for two uncomfortable seconds, “I’ll ask again later, think about it. If you’d rather talk to Hange or anyone else, I won’t take offence.” With that, Levi locked up Eren’s cell and laid down on his cot, facing away from the younger man.
Eren didn’t want to think about it. He was tired from holding back his little side all day, he just wanted to regress and finally get some sleep. And like clockwork, he had a nightmare an hour after falling asleep.
Levi was quick at waking him up, but Eren was already sobbing. “ Shh, sh, sh ” Levi soothed the boy, holding him close and rubbing his back. “What’s wrong, Eren? What happened?” He asked, keeping his voice soft and quiet.
Hange had told him her suspicions of what was going on inside Eren’s poor, overworked brain. She thought the age regression was obvious to anyone with eyes- he’d mutter to himself about staying big and similar topics all the time without noticing and the night she spent with him was only the final nail in the coffin. (She ranted about being called Momma by Eren, and Levi refused to admit the jealousy that sparked in his chest.)
The whole possible molestation thing was what really got Levi, and he tried not to think about how it hit a little too close to home for him.
Either way, they told him that Eren would most likely regress after being woken up to deal with the stress of the nightmare. He got the rundown of how to handle a little from them as well as a pacifier and a baby bottle that he’d carefully hidden in some blankets. He’d get them as soon as he could.
“I wan’ momma” Eren whined into Levi’s chest, hiccups and sobs causing him to shake like a leaf. “You want Hange? I can get you to them, c’mon kid” Levi swiftly unlocked Eren’s cuffs and scooped him up from the bed. He grabbed the pacifier as he left the cellar.
“Let’s go get momma, they’ll be happy to see you” Levi whispered small reassurances as he traversed through the castle. Hange’s room was past all of his squad’s rooms, so it was the only thing keeping Eren from full-on wailing and waking all of them up. (He kept spitting out the pacifier, much to Levi’s annoyance. No amount of scolding changed the outcome.)
He knocked on Hange’s door softly and there was shuffling inside before a barely dressed scientist was revealed. “What do you- ..oh, Levi. Hi” Hange to be surprised for the first time in their life, their hostility melting away in a second.
“Is that-?” They questioned, “Yes. He woke up crying for his momma, I’m assuming that means you.” As if on cue, Eren whined again, “Mhu-mhu-momma!”
“Give me two seconds- I’ll be right back” She shut the door, and Levi smirked when he heard a quiet conversation behind the thick wood. The door opened again, a flushed Moblit standing behind her now.
“Can I see the little man?” She cooed, reaching her arms out. Levi shuffled a bit, “You wanna see momma? C’mon” He said, offering Eren out for Hange to take. Eren laughed a bit through involuntary hiccups, finally smiling again as he was returned to his momma’s arms.
With a newly acquired baby Eren in their arms, Hange went back to their bed, Moblit and Levi following. The captain carefully closed the door behind him, watching the scientist coo over the kid fondly.
“Dada!” Eren called, and both Levi and Moblit rushed forward, knocking into each other and stumbling onto the bed, landing on either side of Hange. Eren giggled at the scene, and that only fueled Levi’s determination to hear that laugh even more.
“I think you gotta specify, sweetie, who’s dada?” Hange asked, and Levi and Moblit shared a look , like it was a contest to be won. “Dada, capin!” Eren pointed at Levi, “Papa, Moooo!” He then pointed at Moblit, continuing to make cow sounds. Moblit laughed, not too hurt from not being ‘dada’.
“‘M tired” Eren yawned as he settled into the bed, comfortably stuck between Levi and Hange.
“Go to sleep then, kid, we’ll be here when you wake up.”
(Levi didn’t pass up the chance to finally get a pacifier in Eren’s mouth, and this time it wasn’t rejected.)