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The night was cold. Frigid. Dry. The wind was whistling quietly, chilling whoever would happen to be out this late to the bone, nipping and stinging at the skin of even the most bundled-up passerby. It wouldn’t take a genius to see that the icy air was likely the reason for the noticeable lack of noise, lines and crowds coming from the yet-still colorfully, vibrantly lit-up Phoenix Wonderland.
The director stared at the park in silence. It was…different, that was for certain. New attractions had been added, some had been renovated: not in the branded, popular way that the park had almost carried out all those years ago with Riley Entertainment, but in a way that almost seemed to expand and exemplify the charming, wonderful magic that had defined Rakunosuke Otori’s vision of the park before his passing. The realizations brought a pang to the director’s chest as it truly struck him just how long it had been since he had been here last.
(Yet, it still unmistakably felt like home.)
Rui Kamishiro clutched in his left hand three slightly crumpled flyers. He had acquired them prior to arriving here, prior to even receiving the spontaneous invitation to come and visit that had made him stare at his inbox in silent shock for several minutes.
(Tears had welled up in his eyes as well, as much as he hated that they had.)
Two of them were advertisements for different musical productions, but they were moreso focusing on the stars of each show: universally critically-acclaimed renditions of The Little Mermaid and Peter Pan, with their magnificent, shining leads, Kusanagi Nene and Tenma Tsukasa, respectively. Two of the most high-profile, renowned actors in Japan who had exponentially broadened their reaches, separately performing to audiences all around the world. The additional flyer crumpled in Rui’s grip was an ad for Phoenix Wonderland itself, where he now stood. The pamphlet was advertising the park’s new renovations, attractions and shows, additions that had raked in crowds like leaves following the assumption of Otori Emu as CEO of Otori Group.
This is where he was told to meet. This is where they would be. So, all there was for Rui to do now was to wait. He sighed, pulling on his scarf to tighten it as he felt himself beginning to shiver. He desperately hoped the current less-than-favorable weather wasn’t any sort of bad sign.
Shifting a bit on his feet, he began to scan the area, letting himself take in the surroundings a bit more, trying to distract himself from how cold it was.
(...and, just to look a bit closer at how much things here have changed.)
Though momentarily caught up in his observation, Rui’s gaze suddenly halted. He felt his heart nearly stop as his eyes landed on a small mural painted on the walls of the now-expanded ticket gates. Painted with bright, cheerful, vivid colors, surrounded with a painted fancy, curled frame and little mini-Phennies dancing cheerfully, were… likenesses of…them. Him. Him and the others.
Wonderlands x Showtime, in a stylized mural, greeting visitors as they entered the park in a frozen state of joy, excitement and warmth. Suspended in time. Suspended in a time when they were still young.
Wonderlands x Showtime had been at the height of their popularity and notability before they had all parted ways. Their reach and notoriety had expanded tenfold (with much thanks to their ambassador performances, which had made their popularity continue to ride higher even after they had concluded), and the troupe was close to becoming the definitive face (or, faces, 4 of them) of Phoenix Wonderland itself. Rui and Tsukasa had already graduated at that point, but they originally intended on staying close by for at least some time to continue their performances part-time while going through college in the area. But almost just as they had reached that height, Tsukasa suddenly received an offer from a known agency scouting a talented actor to perform in their critically acclaimed shows.
It was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity for anyone. It was rare for any agency of that status to simply scout out someone. If they weren’t already employed with a notable competitor or didn’t have any global reach, any person would supposedly have no chance of being reached out to. It was like fate twisted just the tiniest bit in Tsukasa’s favor.
(Favor was what it was, right?)
He was unsure at first. He didn’t want to leave the others—it hurt him to leave the others—but his dream was just in reach. It was right there for the taking. But he didn’t do anything yet.
And then Nene got an offer from a rivaling agency. Equally high-profile and equally as rare of an opportunity. If Rui recalled correctly, the agents who scouted her were in absolute awe of her raw emotion and power in both acting and singing alike.
It was only after getting word that Tsukasa had been scouted out by an agency as well that they pounced on their chance.
The two of them had known that, realistically, it would have been foolish to deny the offers. (And Rui and Emu had known that too, as much as it hurt to think about.) As quickly as the troupe seemed to reach its peak, the one thing that Rui had been quietly worrying, stressing, dreading in his mind for ages prior had snuck up on him in silence and stabbed him with a cold, clean blade in the center of his back.
He didn’t hold it against them, of course. He never could. He still didn’t. He knew that it was the better decision for them to take those opportunities when they were presented right there on a silver platter. Right there, the perfect steps towards the two of them achieving their dreams. Rui knew that it was only his own attachment and love and weakness that kept him from making the same choice years prior. And he was still just as weak as he was then, it seemed, when Nene and Tsukasa had tearfully parted ways with uncertainty (yet, excitement, as well) lighting up their gazes.
He knew was still just as weak when the thought of even staying with Emu alone, without the two others, felt like a void, felt incomplete, felt…wrong.
And in the natural course of time, one thing led to another. Emu’s father was getting older and less fit to run Otori Group. Emu had been increasingly working with her siblings to make decisions for the company, and sometimes, it even seemed that she was more fit to take the helm than they were. She had to put more time into working with the park due to the burden of carrying more and more responsibilities, even in the midst of attending college. (Now, with her brothers working under her, the assumption that she was more fit to lead was fulfilled, it seemed.)
So Rui felt even weaker when, knowing that he couldn’t even try to make things feel normal again without performing alongside all of his troupemates, he left. He bid a bittersweet goodbye to Emu and he left. He was known for his skills in technology and storytelling and took offers to study abroad, later working with producers around the world for special effects and show tech that was unlike anything that was ever seen in the industry before. And he was acclaimed for it. He wasn’t rejected anymore.
Yet, it felt wrong.
After the group had parted ways, each of them becoming renowned for their own individual pursuits, Phoenix Wonderland was promoted as their origin, as their home. This wasn’t a decision made by Emu. Interviews said she was reluctant to go that route, but that her brothers insisted on it, saying it would attract more customers. The other members were contacted for permission to use their likenesses, and had all agreed quietly. Rui hadn’t even known why they would even ask him that question after all these years. He didn’t know what they’d do it for. But he agreed regardless.
But they never contacted each other. Rui, and maybe everyone else as well, he thought, didn’t want to face the pain of memories lost. Rui understood the others for it. But he called himself weak for it.
Yet, he agreed when he got an email one day from Emu, the first contact he’d had with any of the others in years, asking him, Nene, and Tsukasa to come visit PXL after all this time. The raw, aching longing to simply see them again, face-to-face, outweighed any fear in his heart of being crushed by the past.
Now, standing in front of the mural, seeing their smiling faces on the wall as if he was looking into a frozen window into a better time, Rui felt his heart clench.
He had tried to keep himself from reminiscing on the past during his time working abroad. Every time his thoughts would drift to the others, he’d push it out. He didn’t want to linger on it. Because he knew he would feel his heart ache, just as it was now.
During the troupe’s time together, Rui had realized early on that he felt…something for them. All of them. And later on, he had accepted that the feeling was beyond what was considered platonic. He’d tried to brush it off as simple high school crushes. That was normal. He shouldn’t dwell on it. He shouldn’t do anything about it.
He shouldn’t do anything about it because he knew that this wouldn’t last. That they’d have to part ways. He already felt like his desire to stay together simply just as a troupe was getting in the way of everyone’s dreams. Throwing his other silly feelings in there would just make things worse, wouldn’t it?
As it turned out, they weren’t just high school crushes. Even when he tried to push the thoughts of them away, long after their disbanding, he felt a yearning, a longing, a love in his chest that had only grown greater and greater over time. A yearning, not only for what he had lost, the joy of performing as Wonderlands x Showtime, but a yearning for who he had lost. His closest friends. His treasures. As much as he hated to admit it, he felt those same feelings even now, the simple thought of just seeing them all again making him long for and crave the warmth they always brought to his heart.
He was still upset at himself for being so weak. So weak that he just ran away when he realized that he couldn’t repair the split. He could no longer live out his dream of performing together with the three of them. Did he even deserve to see the others now? He wouldn’t blame them if they didn’t even want to see him and invited him simply out of obligation. He wouldn’t blame them at all.
He sighed, seeing his breath come out in a white puff in the cold air, dissipating almost as soon as it appeared. It was useless. They wouldn’t want to see him. He turned away, putting his hands in his pockets, preparing to leave his true home behind—
“Rui?”
He stopped dead in his tracks as he heard her voice. The voice he had known since childhood. Older, matured, but still distinctly her.
He slowly turned around, unsure what he would see—and there they were. They had all grown, they all looked different, but they were still them . They had the same glows in their eyes that they’d had all those years ago.
They were still just as beautiful as he remembered them.
Nene—who was the one who called to him—Emu, and Tsukasa stood there, staring at him as if they couldn’t believe it. Their gazes had a bittersweet look, yet they were also filled with…unmistakable warmth.
Rui’s eyes widened. He felt his feet naturally carry him over to them, slowly, awkwardly, before coming to a halt some distance in front of them.
They didn’t say anything. They just continued to stare at him.
Rui felt a lump form in his throat. It was really them.
“I…” He began awkwardly as he averted his gaze, trying to say something, anything, to break the thick silence that hung in the air between them—
Without a word, Emu came up and hugged him. Rui felt his voice die out, and he didn’t have time to even process before the other two joined in, wrapping all four of them in a group hug.
Rui blinked, his breath shaking as he felt their embrace. He tried to say something again. But before he could, his eyes began to sting. He felt himself begin to shudder.
...and, without even questioning what he was doing, he moved to hug all three of them close as tears sprung up in his eyes. Soon, he was quietly choking back sobs, not moving an inch from the embrace they were all in.
None of them said a word. They stayed in that embrace, outside, in the cold, in front of the Phoenix Wonderland that seemed to have missed their presence, its lights seeming to glow just the slightest bit brighter.
It was almost funny how, despite his persistent longing that seemed to have eaten away at him with each passing day, Rui still hadn’t even quite realized how much he had missed them, how much he had missed their warmth, their smiles, their…simple presence. He had missed them terribly, of course—but now, being here with them for the first time in years, he felt like he couldn’t let go. He felt like his love for each of them was spilling out and enveloping each of them in its warmth.
And, somehow, he felt he could feel the same from each of them.
Maybe things could change. Maybe Rui wouldn’t be left forever as someone with a dream, a dream that was left to rot and die long ago. Even if he and the ones he dreamed of weren’t quite performing together.
Somehow, some way, the future ahead seemed to possibly be just a bit more hopeful. Perhaps.
…He would worry about that later. For now, Rui would simply relish the warmth and love that blanketed him in its comforting embrace.