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It was alarming how quickly he found himself falling for her.
Thoughts of her passed through his mind constantly throughout the day, distracting him with enticing fantasies of her.
He wondered what it would be like to hold her, to kiss her….. to have her fall into his bed willingly.
Viciously he would cast those thoughts aside before they became too much.
He was married. He shouldn't be thinking about that in the first place, a cold shower usually did the trick.
There was a part of him afraid that he would end up enjoying it too much if he allowed his mind to indulge in those thoughts, which could lead him to act on them.
His will to stay faithful to his wife was waning. His desire for that other woman was becoming more intense by the day. All that she had to do was snap her fingers and he would be willing to do anything she asked of him.
A frightening and yet delightful thought.
Shameful and appalling too.
Best thing to do is to never contact her again and spend more time with his wife.
Cut it off before the problem became bigger, yes that was the right thing to do.
If only the thought of never seeing her again didn't make him feel complete and utter despair.
The thought of never being able to play Go with her again, never being able to see her hair tied up showing her neck off enticing him in a sense, never seeing the dark and commanding look in her eyes that sent shivers down his spine, and never being able to witness again the intelligence she possessed, the intelligence that amazed him and drew him further into her presence; it was simply unbearable. He needs her.
He doesn't want to let her go.
He doesn't want to cheat on his wife.
……..
Which is how he found himself one day inviting his wife Yeonjin on a small lunch date, to try to revive any sparks he felt when they first got married. Sparks that may help squash any feelings of that other woman. To see if there was any hope of staying totally faithful to her.
It didn't work.
Silence hung between them during the whole thing, to her credit she did try to engage him with conversation, but he couldn't bring himself to help carry the conversation so it died.
She kept looking at him as though expecting him to do something.
He kept looking at his meal, trying not to imagine someone else sitting in her place.
By the end he asked her to kiss him before she left, to see if there was any hope of not losing himself entirely to that other woman.
Yeonjin had simply smiled, caressed his cheek gently and kissed him.
He had closed his eyes and the image of Dongeun popped in his head, but this time he didn't bother chasing it away. The thought of it being her that he was kissing was far more enjoyable than it being his wife.
Then there was his answer.
There was no hope of him being able to stay faithful.
He's fallen too hard for someone else.