Work Text:
Welcome to the final show,
Hope you’re wearing your best clothes.
Sign of the Times, Harry Styles
“Come sit with me.”
Wilhelm looked down at Simon who patted the space right next to him. They were sitting at the docks by the lake where they normally did their rowing activities. It was a warm Saturday afternoon, a rarity in Sweden during this time. Autumn has begun, trees have started changing their colors - red, orange, yellow, brown - a beauty to look at. Students have settled around the grounds of Hillerska during this time, soaking up as much warmth as they could get, bracing themselves from the cold that was to come.
They were invited to sit down with Felice and Madison that afternoon but Simon and Wilhelm opted out and walked around the campus, wanting to enjoy the weather and the privacy. They found themselves by the docks, mesmerized by the sun shining on the horizon, its light reflected on the water - serene, peaceful, enchanting.
Simon raised his hand to guide Wilhelm to sit down next to him. Wilhelm scooted closer, pressing himself to Simon even if there was a lot of space around them. It was only the two of them around the docks, most of the students don’t go near this area during the weekends, probably wanting to forget about rowing for at least a few days before they begin their activities again.
Simon chuckled as Wilhelm anchored his legs with his, Wilhelm looked at him raising an eyebrow, “What?”
“Nothing,” Simon shrugged, a smile on his lips.
Wilhelm pouted, “I like being close to you.”
“I know. I do too,” Simon said, his smile wider, he lifted his hand to tuck Wilhelm’s hair behind his ears. It had grown a lot during the past year, which he was glad about. He really liked Wilhelm’s long hair better, though he didn’t mind any hair style on him, he just preferred this one.
“It’s so beautiful,” Wilhelm said, turning his attention to the sun, it was already hanging low in the sky, night was about to come.
Simon smiled, his face soft, “You are too.”
Wilhelm turned to him, a blush on his cheeks, “So are you,” he said, reaching out for Simon’s hand.
Taking his hand and intertwining their fingers, Simon heaved a deep breath and looked at Wilhelm, “I wrote you a song,” he whispered.
Wilhelm squeezed his hand, “Really?” he asked, smiling brightly.
Simon nodded, “Would you like to hear it?” he asked tentatively, voice hopeful.
A grin spreads across Wilhelm’s face, “Yes, please.”
* * *
“Wilhelm, are you listening?”
Wilhelm blinks, confusion crossing his features, he turns his head towards the voice, Jan-Olof, one of the members of the Royal Court, was speaking to him with a stern look on his face.
“What was that?” Wilhelm inquires, shaking his head, trying to clear his thoughts and focusing back to the present.
Jan-Olof looks exasperated, a look he’s so used to seeing by now but has always annoyed him. Of course, being the crown prince and in front of the entire Royal Court, he couldn’t express whatever negative feelings he had for the old man. So instead of annoyance, Wilhelm has fixed an innocent look on his face, which normally does the trick.
The old man sighs, “We’re talking about your marriage to Astrid. We need to schedule that very soon,” he looks at the entire table, acknowledging the rest of the people seated in it, including his mother who was nodding her head in approval.
Wilhelm blinks several times, “I’m sorry what now?” he says in disbelief. Marriage? What? How did they arrive in this conversation? He was quite sure it was still too early in his relationship with Astrid for them to be thinking about marriage this soon. It’s only been what, 2 years?
“Wilhelm, if you could please focus on the meeting and not have your mind flying elsewhere when we’re talking about serious matters, that would make all of this easier,” Kristina says, voice laced with annoyance.
Wilhelm opens his mouth, trying to hold his anger, “What’s the rush?” he asks, his voice controlled.
“You’ve been dating for 2 years now, people would be wondering what’s taking so long,” His mother says, her eyes piercing, “We’ve already talked to her and her parents, we all agreed it was time,” she gestures to the entire table, the rest of the royal court nods their heads.
To Wilhelm they all looked like robots, always agreeing over everything that comes out of his mother’s mouth. Or that old man’s mouth. And the same look of exasperation, irritation and disappointment towards him.
Wilhelm raises his eyebrows,“But of course,” he scoffs, “I’m the last to know.” he shakes his head and heaves a deep breath, “Do I get to have a say in this?” he asks, pursing his lips and looking at the rest of them.
“And what, pray tell, would you like to say about this matter Wilhelm?” Kristina questions him, eyebrows raised.
Wilhelm raises his hands, “Oh I don’t know, how about, no , I don’t want to marry her?” he exclaims, looking at his mother in utter disbelief.
His mother shakes her head and sighs, “There is no point at being dramatic over this. The reason why you are dating her is to marry her. We’ve talked about this. It’s been too long of a betrothal, it’s time. We’re going to announce your engagement and you'll get married in September,” she declares, her voice reeking with finality.
Wilhelm grits his teeth, “And I can’t do anything about it?” he asks, looking at her furiously.
She shakes her head, “This is final Wilhelm. We’re just letting you know.”
“Right,” Wilhelm nods his head slowly, hatred evident on his face.
Jan-Olof clears his throat and gathers the papers in front of him and turns his attention to the woman on his left, “Alright that’s settled, Farima, prepare the royal statement for their engagement.”
* * *
Simon stood up from where he was seated, reaching for the remote resting on top of the long table in front of him. They were supposedly having a meeting that day and he braved the hot August sun to get to the office on a Sunday, a rarity, but Miguel, his producer said it was important. It was already too hot, despite it still being around 10 in the morning.
Punching the down button on the remote, Simon settled back down on his chair, fanning himself a little. He was still not used to the Venezuelan weather. Having lived in Sweden for most of his life, his body was used to the cold temperatures, 15° Celsuis was something he considered as warm, so the 27° Celsius he was experiencing right now was already too warm for his body to handle.
His focus shifts on the glass door opening, Miguel enters and gives him a warm smile, “Still not used to the weather eh?” he comments. He moves to take the seat in front of Simon, placing everything he was holding in his arms on the table.
Simon shakes his head still fanning himself, the temperature hasn’t settled inside the room yet, then again it’s just been 10 minutes. He places the remote back on the table and gives his full attention to Miguel. Miguel chuckles at this - it has always amused him how Simon’s body temperature runs so hot despite being half-venezuelan, as if that was enough reason to be used to everything in this country.
He’s been in Venezuela for about 3 years now. Miguel discovered him right after he graduated from Hillerska, get this: while he was singing at a karaoke with friends. Miguel listened to him sing sad songs the entire night and approached him after 3 hours of him screaming his heart out (in tune, mind you), offering him a career here in Venezuela. He thought it was a joke at first, much felt like that during that time, but he told his mom nonetheless. The news excited her and once they researched that Miguel was actually from a respected agency in Venezuela, Simon felt excited too. They got in contact and after several months, he left Sweden and hasn't looked back since then. He called his mom every now and then, when he wasn’t busy making music, she’s been super supportive of him and absolutely thrilled about him releasing songs. He’s released several singles through the years and a couple of EPs. No full album just yet, but they’re already working on it. He’s also been touring around, having concerts all over the country and sometimes outside of it. So far, he’s been to cities in Spain, Mexico, Argentina and Brazil.
It’s been such a journey the past 3 years, there were really difficult times, especially living alone in a country he wasn’t familiar with but, it all turned out really well. He’d have to thank his Mom for making sure he never forgot how to speak in Spanish since he was little, it helped with interaction and from there he managed to form relationships with people who have helped him get settled in. His mom would always tell him how proud of him she is everytime he called her, it really made her happy that he’s making his dreams happen.
As for his sister, Sara, well, he hasn’t talked to her in years. She moved out of the house after finishing her last semester of freshman year in Hillerska and moved back to Marieberg after their falling out because of August. It scared him a bit that she was back there, but Rosh and Ayub made sure she was taken care of, despite all her faults, she was still his sister. Though that didn’t mean he wanted to interact with her again. Maybe time will eventually heal the wounds she’s caused him, but it hasn’t happened yet.
Especially after…
Simon shakes his head to clear his thoughts, blinking his eyes rapidly to get his thoughts back to the present. It was a good thing Miguel was attending to something on his phone, a grin playing on his lips. A signal that something good was about to come. Simon smiles at this.
Miguel gives one last scroll on his phone and then closes it. He places it on the table and looks at Simon, anticipation written all over his face.
“So I called you for this meeting because we’ve received a special invitation for you today,” He begins, his voice brimming with excitement.
A smile appears on Simon’s lips, “Really?” he asks, thrilled.
Miguel nods enthusiastically, he looks down and takes an envelope inside the folder laying on the table. He shows it to Simon and shakes it, grinning widely at him.
Simon’s forehead creases, trying to see what was in it. There was nothing to see from what was facing him, except that the flap was already open and what looked like fancy paper was folded inside of it.
“What is it?” Simon tilts his head curiously.
Miguel wiggles his eyebrows for effect and then bursts out saying, “You’ve been invited to sing at a royal wedding!”
Simon opens his mouth in shock, “What!” he exclaims, hands landing on the table.
Miguel nods again, “Yes! They specifically wrote to me to ask you to come over. They even sent your roundtrip tickets already! And you’re flying first class!” he fans the envelope rapidly, causing it to slip from his hand and land on the table.
Simon reaches for it and looks at Miguel for permission. He nods at him eagerly. Simon takes the envelope, it was thick and silky, which was to be expected from a wedding invitation. He turns it around and sees it addressed to Miguel. He opens the envelope and takes out the paper inside.
It was a fancy paper that emitted a scent he was familiar with but couldn’t put his finger on what.
He opens it and starts reading.
His eyes land on the logo on top of the paper.
Then the words.
He could feel himself getting dizzy.
The world feels like it’s spinning off its axis.
Royal Palace, Stockholm
07 August 2026
Dear Mister Salazar,
It is our great honor to invite Mister Simon Eriksson to sing at the wedding of the Crown Prince Wilhelm to Miss Astrid Strömberg on the 26th of September this year. It would please us greatly if he accepted our invitation. We have already booked his tickets for your convenience. His accommodations have been arranged and a personal driver is ready for his arrival.
Yours sincerely,
Jan-Olof Munck
Royal Adviser to Her Majesty The Queen
This was a joke. Clearly it was a joke. Right? There was no way he’s being invited to the wedding of Wilhelm. There was absolutely no way they’d like him to sing at the royal wedding of his ex-boyfriend , the crown prince who they’ve tried with all their might to leave him, right?
Simon blinks, twice, thrice, re-reading the letter over and over again, trying to decipher if there was a hidden message, a joke about to jump from the words like a pop-up saying, “PRANKED!” or something that would indicate this was a mistake.
His mind was whirling endlessly, adding to the temperature of the room which was now stifling to him because of what he just read.
He went through the letter again.
…at the wedding of the Crown Prince Wilhelm to Miss Astrid Strömberg…
Wilhelm is getting married.
Simon could feel something rise up his chest, a strangling sort of feeling suddenly present around his ribs, pressing his lungs together, making it difficult for him to breathe.
He could feel his eyes prickling - he blinked rapidly, breathing through his mouth. This is not happening. This is not happening. THIS IS NOT HAPPENING. He is dreaming, no, he is having a nightmare.
What could possibly push them to want him to sing at Wilhelm’s wedding?
Wilhelm is getting married.
Wilhelm is getting married.
Wilhelm is getting married.
Simon closes his eyes, trying to control where his thoughts were straying. He breathes in and out heavily, leaning on the chair for support.
“Simon?” Miguel’s voice sounded from somewhere in the recess of his mind, as if from far away, as if from underwater.
He feels like drowning.
“Simon?” Miguel calls out tentatively.
Simon blinks and looks at him, face full of emotion.
“Are you okay?” Miguel asks, voice worried.
Simon opens his mouth, breathes and then closes it again. He licks his lips and then straightens, he squares his shoulders, “No.”
Miguel’s eyebrows meet at the center, “What do you mean no? No you’re not okay?” he looks at him confused.
Simon shakes his head, “No I’m not going to do it.”
Miguel stares at him, his mouth agape, “What do you mean? Why won’t you do it?” he asks, confusion all over his face.
Simon looks at the invitation, his hands shaking. He stares at it for a bit and then places it on the table along with the envelope. He closes his eyes, trying to control his breath, trying to lessen the tight feeling on his chest. He looks up, sadness etched on his features, “I don’t think I can do it.”
Miguel leans his arms on the table, hands joining together, “Explain.”
Biting his lower lip, Simon begins shaking his head, to which Miguel raises his eyebrow. How was he supposed to explain all this? Oh Miguel, I was the ex-boyfriend to the crown prince, he kept me a secret the entire duration of our relationship and then decided to leave me after everything got too much for him. He got my heart broken so many times in our relationship and I haven’t healed yet. So yes, I will not be singing at his wedding.
No he can’t say that. Despite what he feels about Wilhelm, Wilhelm is still not out yet and if he says this, he’d have outed him out of nowhere to his boss and though Miguel may not talk, that doesn’t mean he should tell him. He doesn’t have any right to do that.
“Well?” Miguel’s eyebrows are raised, voice raising a little.
Simon heaves a deep breath and looks at him, “I - I can’t go back to Sweden Miguel,” he begins, Miguel continues to stare at him, he bites his lower lip, “Do you remember the night you discovered me?” Miguel nods, “Well, it was -” his throat was closing up, he swallows and continues “It was a very bad breakup and I don’t think I can go back there.”
Miguel leans back on his chair and closes his eyes. Simon watches emotions play on his face nervously and when he finally opens his eyes again the expression that stays in it makes his heart sink, “I understand,” he starts, voice controlled, “but we have to be professional about this Simon.”
Simon looks down on his lap, a feeling of embarrassment now filling his chest.
“This is a huge opportunity and I don’t want you to miss this,” Miguel continues, “I get it, breakups are hard, but I don’t want that to hinder your success. I don’t want that to stop you from achieving your dreams.”
He wants to tell him everything. To tell him that the reason this is difficult is not because some boy from his home country broke his heart, it was because that crown prince who’s getting married is the same boy who broke his heart.
“I’m sure he’s not even going to be invited to this wedding. So you won’t have to see him. And you’d be home before you know it.” Miguel encourages him, his voice reminiscent of his mother whenever she’s asking him to do something he doesn’t want to and promises something to compensate for it if he chooses to do it.
He wishes it was that easy.
His breath shakes, hands clasping and unclasping from where they’re placed on the table and on his lap. He wanted to tell Miguel everything, but he couldn't. There was no way he’d betray Wilhelm’s trust, even with everything that has happened between them.
“Simon?” Miguel’s voice sounded different from what he normally used with him. Tight, edgy and hard.
Simon looks up and sees that Miguel’s expression has turned to that of disappointment. One he never wanted to see on his face. He’s always done his best in everything he’s doing, and Miguel has brought him so many opportunities and he’s always taken great care of Simon ever since the beginning. Miguel had always expressed how happy he was about all of Simon’s progress, that he was proud of everything he’s accomplished thus far and wanted nothing but the best things for him. Miguel has stood as a father figure to Simon, a good one at that, and to see the same look of disappointment on his face, much like what he saw on his own father’s face growing up, breaks his heart more than he imagined it would.
He bites down on his lower lip, he could feel his eyes starting to well up and he didn’t want to cry in front of Miguel. He takes a deep breath, holding it for a few seconds and then nods his head.
“Yes?” Miguel says, smiling slightly. His voice sounds pleased now.
Simon nods again, this was the most he could do without speaking, he was sure he was going to cry if he opens his mouth.
Miguel’s smile widens considerably, “Perfect.” He gathers his things and then stands up from his seat, preparing to leave, excitement coming back on his face, “I’ll send them our response.”
Simon gives him a small smile, preparing to stand up as well, keeping his tears at bay with all his might.
“Thank you, Simon,” Miguel says before leaving. He holds the door and gives him a soft smile and that proud look he loves seeing on his face, “I’m very proud of you.”
Simon manages to give him a grin before he closes the door, then as soon as it closes, Simon turns his back, looks at the Venezuelan skyline from their glass windows and lets his tears finally fall.
* * *
The cold September air flitted through the windows of the church, making Wilhelm shiver from where he was standing, awaiting instructions. The tux he was wearing seemingly was not adequate to cover him enough to keep him warm. Or he just feels cold today. Yeah, that’s the most plausible explanation for it as he’d normally not shiver in a 12° weather. Today he just feels so desolate and lost and there’s a coldness that has crept in his chest since that morning when they woke him up so he can prepare for his wedding.
His wedding.
The thought makes him want to laugh and cry at the same time.
He remembers walking the palace in a zombie-like state this morning, moving from the shower, to his room, to the dressing room, to the car and then finally inside the church where he was shoved into an empty room to hide from everyone until it was time for him to come out and walk down the aisle. He half expected them to lock him up inside the room, he glances at the door thinking if he should check if he was indeed locked in but decided against it and slumps on the couch near him instead.
What was the point?
It’s not like he can escape.
Or will escape for that matter.
There was no reason to.
None anymore.
Under normal circumstances, this would’ve pissed him off. He’d want to see his partner immediately, excited to see what they would be wearing, wanting to see the face of the love of his life -
“I love you, Wille.”
Wilhelm closes his eyes as an image of Simon laughing by the docks at the lake flashes before his eyes. He was wearing that purple hoodie he loves so much, giving him the most radiant smile that’s only reserved for him.
He could smell his scent, a tinge of coconut and forest.
Wilhelm could feel his chest tightening. But he doesn’t care. He indulges himself in the memory, keeping his eyes shut and searching his mind for that particular one he treasures the most.
Simon sat by the docks with him, the sun was setting and he was holding Wilhelm’s hand tightly with his while he sang the song he’s written for him. It was a beautiful day, Wilhelm remembers, the light of the sun reflected on the still waters, the skies were changing hues and Simon, oh his Simon , was enchanting that day. His voice filled his senses, everything about him that day made him want to scream I love you, I love you, I love you, loud enough for the rest of the world to hear.
But the rest of the world never did hear.
And soon the world closed in on them, broke them until it all became too much for him.
After Simon came back into his life and agreed to become his secret, he thought, everything’s going to be alright now. His mother promised they’d talk about coming out and his relationship with Simon when he turned 18. They held onto that promise, continued with their lives as discreetly as they could and on the year he turned 18, his mother betrayed him.
He should’ve known better. But he was hopeful and he wanted to trust her. He wanted to believe that she’s changed and she’s finally being the mother he wanted all his life. For a while it seemed like that, but everything changed and he was again caged in the traditions, ideals and rules of the monarchy.
For a while he thought, he could suffer through that, as long as he has Simon by his side.
And Simon stayed by his side, no matter what happened.
But it broke him every single day to watch as Simon suffered through it all. He could see the pain in his eyes, could see the difficulties he had to face daily because of him. He wanted to fight but not at the expense of Simon.
So despite it going to shatter him and end whatever happiness he has inside his heart, he let Simon go.
He had to. Even if he didn’t want to.
It was the most difficult day of his life, one he has tucked away from his memories. The pain from that day still pierced him, walking away from Simon as he convinced him that he was willing to face anything with him, to suffer all the consequences of their love, to be with him no matter what…to please, Wilhelm, please don’t leave me, please stay, please I beg you, please don’t do this … until it became all too much and he forced his feet to walk and walk and walk and walk away from the one thing that made his life worth living.
“I love you, Wille.”
He could still see him smiling by the docks as he handed him his gift that day. A musical note necklace. He kept it inside his pockets for days, not knowing when to give it to him, shy about giving him a present, knowing in his heart it was not enough to show his love.
Wilhelm found the perfect time when Simon finished singing his song, giving him a grin as he reached for a strand of hair falling on face, tucking it gently behind his ears.
“That’s so beautiful, Simon,” Wilhelm said, voice shaking from so much emotion.
Simon grinned wider, cradling his face with his hand, “I’m glad you think so,” he looked up, following his hands as it moved on Wilhelm’s features, gentle fingers touching his cheeks, his eyebrows, his nose - Simon’s thumb grazing his lower lip. He brought his eyes back to look at Wilhelm, love reflected into their depths, “I love you, Wille.”
“I love you too, Simon.” Wilhelm whispered as he leaned in for a kiss. Simon welcomed it, lips soft and gentle on his. Wilhelm raised both his hands to hold his face, deepening the kiss, as the other boy smiled into his lips, clasping both hands on his neck. They kissed for what felt like hours, until they had to let go to catch their breath. They rested their foreheads against each other’s, smiling and breathing heavily.
Wilhelm fished a box from the pocket of the white hoodie he was wearing and handed it over to Simon.
Simon moved away from him, holding the box in his hand, looking up at Wilhelm whose face was reddenning, both from their kiss and from nervousness, “What’s this Wille?” his voice shook as he looked at the box and then back at Wilhelm.
“Open it,” Wilhelm said, hands shaking a little.
Simon’s forehead creased but a smile appeared on his lips as he opened the box. On it sat a silver necklace with a quaver pendant. Simon bit his lower lip as he took out the necklace from the box, he lifted it up carefully, looking at it as if it was the most precious thing he has ever seen in his life and then looked back at Wilhelm’s face, a tear threatening to fall from the corner of his eyes.
Wilhelm gave him a soft smile, “I thought of you when I saw it,” he said, his voice quivering, “I think it fits you,” he reached out for Simon’s other hand, taking the box and placing it on the wooden planks they were sitting on, held Simon’s hand and squeezed it, “because to me, you’re music.”
The tear slid down Simon’s cheek and Wilhelm watched its descent until it disappeared from under his chin. He raised his eyes towards Simon who was looking at him with so much love in his eyes. He could feel his lips quivering, so he opted to speak, “Would you like me to put it on you?” he whispered, because it’s all he can do right now without crying.
Simon nodded, handing him the necklace wordlessly, as tears streamed down his face. Wilhelm took the necklace from his hand and carefully unclasped it. He then reached for Simon’s neck, leaning slightly, feeling Simon’s shaking breath near his ears as he clasped the necklace back together. He moved back to look at it, the quaver note resting just above Simon’s sternum. He looked back up at Simon and gave him a smile, “It looks good on you,” Wilhelm said, his voice still shaking slightly.
Tears after tears raced down Simon’s cheek, “Thank you, Wille.” his eyebrows trembled along with his lips. He reached out for him and Wilhelm leaned into his embrace.
“I love you.” Wilhelm whispered softly, tightening his arms around him.
A sob escaped Simon’s lips as he hugged him tighter, “I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you. I love you, I love you, I love you.”
“Crown Prince Wilhelm?”
Wilhelm snaps back to the present. He blinks his eyes and finds that he has been crying. He wipes his tears frantically and fixes himself, standing up from the couch. He glances at the full body mirror leaning on the wall near the door and when he deems himself presentable, he clears his throat and answers, “Yes, I’m here.”
The doorknob turns and the face of his mother’s secretary, Farima, comes into view.
He acknowledges her with a nod of his head, she gives him a small smile as she opens the door wider and says, “We’re ready for you.”
WIlhelm takes several deep breaths, grounding himself and pushing the anxiety that was about to take over. He gives Farima a tight lip smile and walks toward the door. Farima walks away immediately, moving towards the hallway that would lead to the entrance of the church, where Wilhelm is expected to take his place to start the ceremony.
He stops for a second on the doorway, opening his mouth a little, his breathing coming in fast.
He closes his eyes and for a second and he’s back at the docks, his heart fluttering madly on his chest.
“I love you too, Simon,” Wilhelm whispers into the empty room and then reaching out for the doorknob, he closes the door behind him.
* * *
The church was impossibly full, more people than Simon could’ve expected. But then again, this was the wedding of the crown prince. To expect anything less was an insult to the monarchy, or what they would say if they heard what Simon’s expected amount of people in this event would be anyway.
The wedding of the crown prince.
Simon could only chuckle sadly to himself as he coordinated with the choir about the song he was going to sing.
The crown prince.
To him he’s just Wilhelm.
Just Wilhelm.
The boy, now a man, he knew and loved.
Loved?
Who was he kidding?
He still loves Wilhelm.
It was why it's so difficult on his way here, why the moment he stepped out of the plane this morning he felt like running back to it and locking himself in one of the toilets and pretending he didn’t exist until the damn plane takes off again and takes him back to Venezuela.
But alas he has Miguel’s face and words stuck inside his head, and as much as he wants to run, he couldn’t. So he found himself getting out of the airport, walking to the royal driver waiting for him outside the airport and suffering through the memories that washed over him on the way to the hotel they booked for his accommodations. He tried to shut down his emotions, pushing down all flashbacks coming at him in successions and focused his mind into getting dressed. They had an entire wardrobe prepared for him and a team of artists to help him with his hair, make-up and to dress up. It wasn’t anything new to Simon, especially since he’s been doing concerts for a while now, but this treatment from the Royal Palace was something new to him. He was rather used to being ignored and the lot of them pretending he doesn’t exist.
They should’ve continued with that mindset and not invite him to sing at this wedding.
A buzz of voices takes Simon away from his thoughts and his attention turns toward the entrance where several people have turned their heads to look.
He tiptoes a little to catch a glimpse of what they were looking at and instantly regretting it.
There on the entrance, with flashing lights from several bulbs of cameras, stood Wilhelm.
He’s wearing a black tux emblazoned with golden buttons and underneath was a light blue vest on top of a white long sleeve polo. There were other things attached to his tux, but Simon couldn’t make them out unless he walked over to where Wilhelm was and actually looked at them from a few feet away.
Simon could feel his throat closing up on him, the church felt like it was turning. He shakes his head a little, trying to ground himself and pushing aside the anxiety that was slowly taking hold of him right that very second.
“Excuse me, Sir?” One of the choir members taps his shoulders.
Simon turns to her and gives her a smile, “Yes?”
“Just checking, this is the piece we’re going to sing when the bride takes her walk right?” She shows him the sheets she was holding.
Simon takes a peek and is about to say yes when a thought crosses his mind, “Actually - we’re doing this instead.” He reaches out for the envelope he brought with him, containing another set of sheet music. He didn’t know why he even thought of bringing these over, but he did a last minute packing and decided to do it anyway.
He takes out several sheet music as the crowd takes in the appearance of the crown prince and gives the choir, along with the band, a new set of instructions. He knew this was too last minute, but it was an easy piece and they didn’t have to do much. Besides, people were still fussing over Wilhelm, there was still time.
He could get in trouble for this but he doesn’t really care anymore.
Simon takes a look at Wilhelm as the crowd disperses and the band prepares to play for his descent on the aisle.
Wilhelm’s jaw was set, his posture perfect. In people’s eyes, he looks like every bit of a crown prince.
For Simon, he looks like his greatest heartbreak.
* * *
The music swells as he takes his first steps into the aisle, walking the right pace before he gets to the end and stands beside the priest waiting for him and his bride. Cameras clicked left and right, some still with flashes. He looks straight at the end, focuses his attention on his spot and erases all thoughts in his mind.
Once he reaches the end, he takes his spot, giving a priest a small smile and then turns his attention towards the people taking their walk, awaiting for when his bride takes her turn and fixing a smile he’s been practicing for months to look good for the cameras.
It took a few minutes that felt like hours for Wilhelm, not because he was excited, but because he was simply dying inside at the thought of what was going to happen in a few moments. A signal that his bride finally appeared sounded as the crowd made an audible gasp at the sight of her. Astrid stood at the end of the aisle wearing a magnificent wedding gown and standing poised and every bit the princess his mother wished he would marry.
The music shifted and the choir prepared to sing for the bridal walk.
I’ll do it on a thousand times to call you home
Wilhelm’s eyes widen as a familiar voice sounds from his left and he swiftly turns his head towards the person standing on a podium singing as Astrid takes her walk on the aisle.
Simon.
Wilhelm’s breath hitches at the sight of him. He was wearing a maroon blazer, so reminiscent of what he was wearing during their Hillerska days, he wasn’t facing him, but he could clearly see his profile, one he hasn’t seen in 3 years but has plagued his dreams every single night.
What was he doing here?
I will never lie about this, ain’t no joke
Wilhelm knew he was staring, but he couldn’t peel his eyes away from him. He was so glad the entire crowd along with the cameras were focused on Astrid, his brain not properly registering that there could also be cameras trained on him.
You’re cutting through the silence with a perfect tone
If you break, then I break, we’re not made of stone
He could remember when he first heard this song sung to him by the docks, Simon’s voice soft and touching even the edges of his soul.
Today, Simon’s voice is strong, standing tall amongst the choir and singing just like he did the first time he saw him in Hillerska.
It’s gotta be that you remind me of
Every single song on the radio
You’re the type of melody I can’t live without
The priest clears his throat and Wilhelm reluctantly shifts his attention towards Astrid who reaches the center of the aisle, beaming at everyone.
I can’t breathe, breathe, breathe, breathe, baby on my own
I can’t breathe, breathe, baby, on my own
It’s not that I’m afraid
I just have to say it out for the world to know
That I can’t breathe, breathe, breathe, breathe, baby on my own
He could see Simon looking at him in his peripheral view. But he couldn’t make out the expression on his face without looking at him fully. He blinks and fixes his face, preparing to flash the smile he’s been practicing for months. Astrid turns her attention towards him, a smile on her lips, Wilhelm’s face slowly breaks into a smile as the cameras turn in his direction.
I can see the future as we’re passing by
And we’re never stopping at no red, red light
Whatever you decide, just know you’re not alone
If you break, then I break, we’re not made of stone
“I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you.”
Wilhelm could feel his eyes burning, he takes a shaky breath in, pushing all emotions down where they can’t reach his heart, keeping the smile on his face and waiting for Astrid to reach him.
All the hard times
Yeah, they made us so much greater
All the hard times
Yeah, they made us so much greater
“Please, Wilhelm, please don’t leave me, please stay, please I beg you, please don’t do this .”
A tiny tear slides down Wilhelm’s cheeks as he reaches out to take Astrid’s hand, Astrid’s forehead creases a little, thinking he was caught up in the moment, she gives him a soft smile and reaches her gloved hand towards his cheeks to wipe the tear away. The sound of happy sighing sounded through the entire church as the crowd took that moment in.
Wilhelm knew it must’ve looked phenomenal, he was sure the entire royal court approved of that. His mother might even gush about that moment to him after all of this is over.
But to Wilhelm, his heart felt like it was being ripped apart into tiny little pieces, bleeding on the ground he was standing on, memories of the most painful day of his life surfacing today of all days and Simon’s voice sounding inside his head and outside, echoing through his entire being, making him shake as he held onto Astrid’s hand, guiding her towards the priest and standing next to each other to share their vows.
I can’t breathe, breathe, breathe, breathe, baby on my own
I can’t breathe, breathe, baby, on my own
It’s not that I’m afraid
I just have to say it out for the world to know
That I can’t breathe, breathe, breathe, breathe, baby on my own
He gives Astrid a glance, she beams at him.
She is radiant, beautiful, enchanting even.
But all Wilhelm could see is a curly haired boy sitting by the docks looking at him with all the love in his heart reflected in his eyes.
Simon.
* * *
The guests moved to the reception near the Royal Chapel, there were several thousand guests present and the location was filled almost immediately after the wedding ceremony was over. Simon walks towards the table where he was assigned and found that he was to be seated with his old Hillerska schoolmates. The girls, Felice, Medison, Stella and Fredrika and the boys Henry, Valter, Nils and to his surprise, Vincent. There were a few others he couldn’t remember much because he didn’t spend time with a lot of them.
There was a surprise gasp from Felice who immediately stood up from where she was sitting, wearing a beautiful powder blue gown. Simon spreads his arms wide to welcome her to his embrace. They hug for a few seconds followed by one from Madison, Stella and Fredrika. The guys gave him a smile, he squeezed their shoulders and proceeded to take his seat at the table, in between Felice and Henry.
Simon’s phone buzzes, he looks down and sees Miguel has texted him.
How did it go? Can you call me?
Excusing himself from the group, Simon walks towards the exit, wanting to find a private and less noisy place so he can call Miguel properly. He weaves through several tables and finds himself face to face with the Queen, with Wilhelm and his new wife following behind her. Thankfully, they were talking with several guests and hadn't noticed his presence just yet.
Simon wants to bolt, but knows that was not what he wanted them to see, so instead he gives a small bow and addresses the queen, “Your Majesty,” Simon says, loud enough to carry through the noise.
The queen regards him with a nod, a small smile on her face (Simon knew she had to keep up with appearances, especially today), “Mr. Eriksson, I’m so glad you came!” she says feigning enthusiasm.
Wilhelm suddenly turns his head towards his direction, eyes wide and staring.
Simon smiles at the Queen, he could feel his heart beating madly in his chest, “Thank you for inviting me,” he responds, keeping his voice normal.
“Oh my goodness! It’s you!”
A voice from behind the Queen sounded and Wilhelm’s new wife took her place next to the Queen, “You’re the one who sang at the church today!” she beams.
Simon could feel the blood leaving his face and glancing at Wilhelm, he could see that he's feeling the same thing too.
“Wilhelm look who it is!” she says, pulling Wilhelm next to her.
Wilhelm looks as if he has seen a ghost, he stares at Simon and only stops when his mother clears her throat.
“Simon.” Wilhelm says in acknowledgement.
Simon tilts his head in recognition, his senses were reeling, “Wil-” he clears his throat, “helm. Wilhelm.” he repeats.
A look of irritation crosses the Queen’s face at this exchange, “Well, Mr. Eriksson, thank you for coming. We hope you enjoy your stay and have a safe flight back,” she says hurriedly, taking Wilhelm’s arm and pulling him away. Wilhelm however pulls his arms from his mother’s grasp and stays rooted on the spot.
“I was going to be mad at you for changing the bridal song but the one you sang was even better!” The new princess exclaims, oblivious to whatever was happening between him, Wilhelm and the Queen, “Was that an original? Did you write that?” she inquires, looking really interested.
Wilhelm’s eyes zone in on him, Simon wants to laugh and cry at the situation, but he also knows that he brought this upon himself when he changed the original requested song with his.
“Yes I did, back when I was studying in Hillerska.” Simon responds amused.
Her face registers shock, “You went to Hillerska?” she turns to Wilhelm, “Didn’t you also go to Hillerska Wilhelm?” she asks.
The Queen clears her throat, “I really think we should go around and meet more guests.” She takes the princess’ hand and guides her away from Simon, “Thank you for your time Mr. Eriksson,” she says hurriedly as she pulls on the princess’ arm, who was now looking at Wilhelm and then Simon and then back again as if trying to connect the dots.
Before she could arrive at any conclusion, Simon gives them a nod and then turns on his heel, he could see Wilhelm opening his mouth about to say something but before he could even do so, Simon walks out of the venue. With hands shaking he calls Miguel and assures him that everything went well, they talk for a bit and he lets him know he’d be back in the office on Monday. After saying goodbye, he walks around, not ready to go back in yet and face his friends and most of all to see Wilhelm again.
He finds a secluded place outside the venue and leans on the wall to look at the sky. There were many stars tonight and Simon loves the cold air breezing past his face. His skin felt like singing as the familiar weather envelopes him again. He closes his eyes, smiling, head facing the sky.
“What are you doing here?”
Simon immediately opens his eyes and turns his head. Wilhelm was standing just a few feet away from him with a complicated look on his face.
Simon could feel his heart speed up again, “Taking a bit of fresh air?” he responds, tearing his gaze away from him and back to the sky.
“No I mean - what are you doing here .” he repeats, Simon could see in his peripheral vision that Wilhelm was pointing at the venue itself.
Simon shrugs, feigning nonchalance, ”Your mother invited me to come sing at your wedding,” he gives him a side glance, controlling his expression, “Congratulations by the way,” he says casually.
Wilhelm takes a step towards him, “Simon, I’m- “ he starts, voice low and pleading.
“Save your breath, Wilhelm”, Simon sighs heavily. He could see Wilhelm flinching at the name he’s called him, the look of hurt on his face squeezing his heart a little.
Wilhelm’s forehead creases but he looks determined, “No, I want to say it.”
Simon turns to him a little, raising an eyebrow at him, he gives him a little nod, “Well then, go ahead.”
“I’m sorry.” Wilhelm’s voice is steady, but Simon could see his hands shaking slightly
He doesn’t respond, just keeps regarding him, looking at him waiting for him to continue. Wilhelm fidgets under his gaze, he bites his lower lip and hands close and open - all of this a signal that he was having anxiety. Simon wants to reach out to hold him, but he knows he didn’t have the right to. The newly installed ring on Wilhelm’s finger is proof of that.
“I’m sorry,” Wilhelm repeats, he could see sorrow in his eyes and it makes Simon want to hold out his hand so he can embrace him, “for everything I’ve,” he takes a deep breath, “I’ve said that night. I just-”
Simon interrupts, ”Does it matter?”
Wilhelm’s forehead creases even more, if that was possible, he looks upset now, “It matters to me.”
Simon inclines his head down, pointedly looking at Wilhelm’s hand, “Sure it does.”
Wilhelm follows his line of sight and closes his fist, “Now that’s not fair,” he says aggrieved.
Simon laughs at this, “Were you?”
Wilhelm doesn’t respond instead he bows his head, shoulders slumping.
Simon tilts his head and chuckles, “Yeah, I didn’t think so.”
Wilhelm looks up again, eyes pleading, “Simon, please-”
Simon steps away from the wall and from Wilhelm, “Go back inside Wilhelm. Your wife is waiting for you,” he motions for the venue and then turns away from Wilhelm the second time that night and goes back inside the venue to rejoin his friends.
* * *
The festivities continue and Wilhelm tries his best not to let his eyes wander from where Simon is sitting. He seems to be enjoying his time with their friends, Wilhelm is thankful that he was placed with them. After a few hours, the guests finally dispersed and went on their way. His mother and father left the venue after a few hours, even before the guests started leaving, Astrid stayed with him for a bit, talking enthusiastically with guests and her side of the family. After a few minutes she told him she’d turn in and invited him to do the same but he refused and told her he was planning to spend some time with his friends.
She looked at him funny then but didn’t say anything. In all honesty, Wilhelm didn’t care one bit. Though he doesn’t hate her and actually thinks she’s a wonderful woman, she was way too much of her mother’s pawn than he’d like - doing everything the Royal Court asks her to do, too excited to be a princess. They don’t really interact much unless necessary. Even the affection they show in public is well executed. She doesn’t mind it at all, the position he’s going to give her is far more important to her than anything else.
Eventually Astrid left, driven by the royal chauffeur. Wilhelm removes his blazer and walks towards his friends, still eyeing Simon who's laughing exuberantly with Henry and Valter about something. This was a little out of character for him and it worried him a little. It was only after close inspection that he noticed the blush on his cheeks and sway on his movements.
Simon was tipsy.
“Oh, the man of the hour!” Vincent exclaims upon seeing him walking towards their table.
Wilhelm gives them a small wave, Felice stands up from her seat and gives him a tight hug, Madison, Stella and Fredrika all give him waves, while Henry, Valter and Nils stood up to hug him too.
Chancing a glance at Simon again, Wilhelm saw him fiddling with his mobile phone, looking unconcerned by his presence.
“Join us!” Nils says tapping the table. Wilhelm gives him a smile and takes the seat opposite Simon. A waiter appears and refills their glasses, giving Wilhelm a glass of his own. He takes a sip of the wine and looks at Simon who went back to chatting with Henry and Valter again, looking way too eager than normal.
Leaning in on the table, he engages in conversation with Nils and Vincent, with the girls piping in conversation every now and then. They start talking about their plans for the future and turn to Simon asking about his life in Venezuela. Wilhelm listens intently about his budding career there, trying his hardest not to react and appear as indifferent about all of this information, even if his insides were squirming and his heart was racing just listening to Simon’s voice.
After an hour, they find that they’re the only ones left in the venue. The boys and some of the girls were already drunk, after taking so much alcohol from the waiters who kept on refilling their glasses. Even Wilhelm was feeling a bit tipsy and refused the next batch of drinks. He leans on his chair and checks on everyone’s face at the table when he catches Simon staring at him.
He holds his gaze, breathing heavily, taking in the changes on Simon’s face and what remained. Simon opens his mouth slightly, eyes moving down to lips. The gesture takes Wilhelm by surprise and his mouth opens on its own accord.
He could feel his breath hitching as Simon closes his eyes.
“Simon, can I request something?”
Simon immediately opens his eyes and turns his face towards Madison, face reddening.
“What is it?” he says, his voice shaking a little.
She bites her lower lip, “Can you maybe, sing us a song?”
Everyone on the table looks at him eagerly, nodding their heads agreeing with what came out of her mouth. Wilhelm keeps his eyes on Simon’s face, Simon on the other hand refuses to take a look at him again.
Simon laughs, “Where?”
The group looks around and Nils points at the podium where the band was set up. They were still there, talking amongst themselves and drinking, taking the opportunity that the crown prince and his friends were still enjoying their night.
“You can do it there!” Nils says excitedly.
Simon groans but follows as Henry and Valter heaves him out of his seat, their entire table stands up from their seats and transfers to the table near the podium. The waiters immediately come and help them with their glasses, as they make their way towards their table, some of them, namely Stella, Fredrika, and Vincent, could not even walk straight and needed to hold on to chairs along the way.
Wilhelm looks at Simon, he doesn't seem to be drunk, just a little tipsy. He was shaking his head in amusement as he walked towards the made up stage, giving the members of the band an embarrassed smile, they looked at him expectedly.
“Um, could you - if it’s alright, my friends want to -” Simon scratches the back of his head, “If you could please-” he gestures towards the musical instruments.
Wilhelm fights back a smile, he couldn’t really help himself, Simon looks adorable.
The band members open their mouths in understanding and nod their heads eagerly, placing their glasses at a nearby table and taking their places. They give Wilhelm a small bow which he regards with a small wave. Their group cheers as the band sets up and Simon takes a look at the faces at their table, skipping Wilhelm and gives them a thumbs up. Wilhelm bites his lower lip, stopping the smile that was continuously trying to escape his lips. His eyes fall on Felice who's looking at him amused. He blinks and looks away.
Simon turns on the mic and gives it a few taps, the sound echoes towards the entire venue. He turns around and whispers something to the band and they immediately take hold of their instruments, ready to play on his signal. Wilhelm straightens on his chair, bracing himself.
“Okay, one, two, three,” Simon raises his hand and motions for the band to start playing.
The beginning notes of It Takes A Fool To Remain Sane starts and the entire table cheers. Simon laughs, takes a hold of the microphone stand and starts singing.
As soon as Simon’s voice sounded through the speakers, Wilhelm felt himself transported to a time when everything was so much simpler.
Whatever happened to the funky race
A generation lost in pace?
Wasn’t life supposed to be more than this?
In this kiss, I’ll change your bore for my bliss.
He was seated on the front pew of the church in Hillerska, sandwiched between August and his late brother Erik. He didn’t know what to expect then, he was scared and wanted to leave originally, but when he heard Simon’s voice everything changed. Suddenly, it didn’t feel so bad to stay at Hillerska.
Simon’s voice gave him…hope.
“Louder!” Vincent shouts from where he was sitting and Wilhelm couldn’t help the laughter that came out of his mouth as Simon gives him the finger from the stage. Vincent laughs at this and Simon motions for all of them to clap their hands. A fond smile crosses Wilhelm’s face, unable to stop it this time, this entire situation feels so surreal to him. Never in his wildest dreams did he even think this would happen to him, especially after they separated.
Their friends cheered, danced and sang along with Simon. The amount of alcohol consumed contributed to their very loud voices and unbridled behavior. Wilhelm joined the cheering and clapping but opted not to dance - he did sing whenever he thought Simon wouldn’t notice though.
Simon takes a bow while their group gives him a standing ovation. Wilhelm felt so proud, he wanted to say something but decided not to just in case it destroys the moment. Simon beams at the rest of them and was about to go down the stage when Henry exclaimed, “One more!”
Simon stops and speaks through the mic, “Okay, what do you want me to sing?”
There’s a quiet murmur around the group until Valter speaks, “How about the Hillerska song you made? Just for old time’s sake?”
Wilhelm’s eyes flicker towards Valter looking at him as if he’s gone mad.
The Hillerska song that Simon made was made specifically for him. He don’t think -
His thoughts gets interrupted by Felice, “I don’t think that’s-”
Simon raises his hand to stop her from talking, “Hillerska song it is.” He looks at the band and shakes his head, motioning that he’d do it acapella.
Wilhelm waits with bated breath.
Forna dagar, flydda år
De säger tid läker alla sår
Det gjorde ont, jag tappa bort mig själv
Jag var lost, innan jag hittade hem
Goosebumps erupt on Wilhelm’s skin as Simon’s voice fills the venue. It echoes through the entire hall, hauntingly beautiful. Wilhelm could feel tears forming on his eyes, his chest tightening. He didn’t think he would be able to hear this live again. To look at Simon and hear him sing this song, knowing why it was written and who it was for.
He looks at their circle and finds Henry, Valter, Madison, Stella and Fredrika had turned on the flashlights on their phones and started waving it in the air. He catches Nils looking at him pointedly and tilting his head towards Simon who has his eyes closed singing the song. He glances at Felice, she was looking at Simon worriedly.
Det vi hade och de vi var
Kan aldrig glömma allt som var bra
Om ni kräver mig på svar
Lever alla minnen kvar
Wilhelm raises his hand towards his chest, rubbing it and then gripping his shirt where his heart is, as if he could hold his heart with his bare hands.His chest feels heavy, his lungs feeling like they were being crushed. Felice looks at him and then at Simon and then back again, distress evident on her features.
Vi har prövats, vi fick slåss
Men det vi var kan ingen ta från oss
Går skilda vägar när det är slut
Simon opens his eyes and finds Wilhelm’s, he holds his gaze, “Nåt som jag kommer minnas livet ut,” he raises his other hand and brings it towards his neck, “Det vi hade och de vi var”, he grips something inside his shirt, “Kan aldrig glömma allt som var bra,” a tear slides down his cheek, “Om frågan har ett svar,” he lets go of what he was holding on to, “Lever Hillerska alltid kvar,” he raises his face, wipes at the tear furiously and then mutters, “I’m sorry I can’t do this.”
Simon leans down and walks away from the stage. Their friends (except Felice) look at Simon surprised, those who had their mobile phones raised slowly bring their hands down, looking at each other confused.
Wilhelm’s looks at Simon, pain etched on his features, his eyes move down and into Simon’s throat… where a quaver note pendant rests on top of his white shirt.
Wilhelm’s breath catches on his throat.
Simon looks at their group apologetically, he purses his lips, glances at his watch and says, “I’m sorry guys I have to go. I had fun though, thank you.” The girls pout at this but stand up just the same to give him a hug. Felice takes him in her arms and grips him tightly, murmuring words only Simon could hear. Nils and Vincent raise their hands for a high five, while both Henry and Valter wrap their arms around him in a group hug.
He turns to Wilhelm, “Congratulations again,” he says simply.
Wilhelm watches him, as for the third time that night, Simon turns on his heel and leaves him behind.
* * *
Simon walks out of the venue, the night wrapping him in its cold embrace. He immediately takes his phone out of his pocket and opens his messages. He informs the driver appointed for him that he’s ready to meet in front of the church in 15 minutes. He was 2 hours early, but he doesn’t care, he wants to go back to Venezuela as soon as possible. To go back to where he’s not feeling like this. To go back to where his heart is safe. He places the phone inside his pocket and takes a step towards their meeting point.
“What are you doing?”
Simon stops on his tracks, his foot hanging in the air. He turns around and finds Wilhelm standing just outside the venue, the second time that night.
“You’ve done this before, you should recognize the gesture,” he says angrily.
He is so tired.
He is so tired from trying to control his emotions, from putting a facade that everything is alright when it isn’t. He is so tired from all the memories, from all these feelings he has. Feelings he’s tried his best to push down all these years, feelings he wanted so badly to forget.
He is so tired and he wants out. He turns around again and takes several steps away from Wilhelm.
“Don’t walk out on me, please.” Wilhelm pleads.
Simon stops on his tracks, turns around and scoffs, “Funny… I said that to you and you still left.”
“Simon-” Wilhelm whispers achingly.
Simon proceeds to walk again.
“Simon, wait, please.” Wilhelm follows him hurriedly, he reaches out for his arm, Simon stops walking and turns to him, Wilhelm stops his forehead creasing, “Please.”
Simon looks at his face, feeling his heart shatter inside his chest, like the day Wilhelm left, he closes his eyes, bites his lower lip, breathing coming in rapid succession. He opens his eyes again and as he does so, angry tears slide down on his cheeks, he shakes his head, he can’t do this anymore.
Wilhelm is married.
What was the point of all of this?
Why did he come?
Why did he have to go through this pain again?
What does he want from him?
With his jaw clenched he utters, “Goodbye, Wille.”
He turns but Wilhelm grips his arm, he twists them away from his grip, but Wilhelm simply won’t let go.
“Let. Me. Go.” He says gritting his teeth.
“Why are you still wearing the necklace?” Wilhelm whispers.
Simon bites his lower lip, feeling it quiver, he raises his head, turns around slowly and lifts his hand towards the necklace in question, “Oh this?” he asks, gripping it, and then pulls, “Was about to give it back to you.”
Wilhelm’s eyes widen as he looks at the necklace hanging on Simon’s hand, then at Simon’s face. Simon raises an eyebrow at him as a tear slides down on Wilhelm’s cheek. Wilhelm lets go of his arm.
“Take it.” Simon says, taking Wilhelm’s hand and placing the necklace on his palm.
Wilhelm looks up at him, “No, please, Simon-”
Simon’s phone buzzes, an incoming call from the chauffeur. His 15 minutes were up.
He takes one last look at Wilhelm’s face, feeling his heart bleed at the look he was giving him. All the pain, the suffering, the sadness he felt years back when Wilhelm left him now reflected on Wilhelm’s features.
Simon squares his shoulders, “Goodbye.”
Wilhelm shakes his head vigorously.
Simon turns again, takes a step, two, three, four, Wilhelm doesn’t stop him this time. Simon could feel more tears threatening to fall from his eyes, but he refuses to let them. He walks and walks until he finds the car waiting for him. He enters the car, declining to look outside the window, afraid to see Wilhelm still looking at him, with desolation and heartbreak on his face. Simon knew he wouldn’t be able to take it.
There is nothing else he could do.
This is the end, there is no turning back now.
“Sir? Where to?” The chauffeur asks, looking at him through the rearview mirror.
Simon gives him a quick glance, “To the airport.”
The car starts and begins to move. Simon takes a shaky breath and braves looking at the window.
Wilhelm was still standing outside the venue, looking at the car he was in, his hand on his chest. The car moves away, Simon turns on his seat to keep looking at Wilhelm, muttering, “ one last time, one last time, one last time ,” the car takes a swift turn and then Wilhelm is gone.
Gone forever from his life.
The tears he kept at bay finally fell down on his cheeks, damp, warm and never-ending. He stifled a sob as he remembered his laughter tonight, when he flipped Vincent off, his eyes following him everywhere, and his proud face as he sang on stage.
“Because to me, you’re music.”
Simon raises his head, clenching his eyes shut, tear after tear racing down on his cheeks, his hand lifts on his neck, fingers searching for the familiar feeling of his quaver pendant. He grips his shirt recalling that he has given that back to Wilhelm.
There was nothing left with him.
No necklace, no Wilhelm.
There was only heartbreak.
It feels like his world is ending.
Because how can it not?
When he doesn’t and will never have Wilhelm anymore?