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Adam scrunched his nose at the chili dog Felix sat next to him. Though Adam brought his own lunch to the Observatory every day, most of his imaging team enjoyed eating at the Cosmic Café. Nigel had encouraged Adam to join the team when they invited him for lunch, and even though he hadn’t quite gotten used to the smell of chili dogs, Adam had to admit it had improved his relationship with them.
The relationship was so much improved, in fact, that Felix had asked if Adam would meet him for lunch 20 minutes earlier than usual. Adam didn’t like the idea, but Nigel had told him that small deviations in his schedule, done as a favor for members of his team, would further build their relationship. Felix had already agreed to do some data entry for Adam’s side project, which meant he could spend Saturday afternoon with Nigel for the first time in a month.
“Why did you want to talk to me?” Adam tapped on the table softly, careful to keep his fingers from the chili dog.
“Hey Adam thanks for helping me out, I just wanted you to look at this for me.” Felix took a bite of his chili dog and pulled a binder out of his messenger bag. “It’s not work-related, so I figured if you could just take a look now-”
Adam opened the binder, seeing a repeating set of numbers — fifteen numbers in total with a question mark at the end. It looked like a substitution cipher.
“Oh, here’s the key so you can-”
“Will you marry me?” Adam looked up, frowning. “Is that it?”
Felix blushed, laughing. “Yeah, that’s it. I was planning to give it to Lucy. It’s our game night tonight and I thought-”
“It’s not very hard.” Adam tapped the cipher. “It’s a monoalphabetic substitution cipher and you didn’t even code the punctuation.”
Felix paused, chili dog halfway to his mouth. Adam eyed a glob of chili that was threatening to fall on the table warily. “You think it should be harder?”
“Once she figures out that 9 is R or that 15 is M she’ll realize you’ve assigned the numbers to the alphabet backward.”
Felix bit the chili dog, saving Adam from the precarious glob of chili, but blowing fetid chili-scented air his way when he spoke. “You think it should be harder?”
“It’s not a very fun game if it only takes 20 seconds.”
“Well, I know, but I want her to get it.”
“But if she likes games, maybe she’d enjoy a challenge?”
“Shit.” Felix sulked into his chili dog. “I was really hoping for something special. Something we could tell our kids about.”
Adam smiled, thinking about Nigel. He’d never understood the impulse to do something special in romantic relationships before. He’d asked Nigel once, why he always tried to make things special when Adam was perfectly happy with what they had.
Nigel had said, “Because I want you to know that you’re worth the effort, gorgeous, and you always will be.”
After that, Adam started trying to make things special for Nigel too. Adam brewed the coffee in the morning, so Nigel could sleep an extra 15 minutes, even though Adam still found the smell sour. He made sure that one Saturday a month he’d schedule a Nigel Day — even though it made him a bit tense, he’d stay in bed with Nigel until noon. The sex was an excellent distraction from this deviation in his schedule, but the real reason Adam ignored the alarmed voice in his head telling him that he had things to do was the quiet moments, when Nigel pressed sleepy smiling kisses into Adam’s shoulder, rubbing stubble along his neck as he mumbled nonsense words and drew Adam deeper into the warmth of their bed. Seeing Nigel so gentle and happy was worth the effort. Nigel was worth the effort.
That’s why Adam had put so much thought into the ring he’d ordered for Nigel – a plain gold band with a ring of dinosaur bone and a ring of meteorite. Nigel always said that Adam could do better than an old dinosaur like him, and when the ad for custom jewelry popped up on his browser, Adam jumped at the chance. He’d spoken to Harlan about it, making sure his metaphor was clear.
“Yeah yeah, the old bones are Nigel and you’re the meteorite, right?”
“Yes. Do you think he’ll like it?”
“Adam, he likes everything you do. You could stick a washer on that man’s finger and he’d be over the moon.”
“But…he hasn’t proposed to me, yet. I know he said he’d get married again, but maybe he meant to another woman or he doesn’t think I’m a good ma-”
“Adam, I may think he’s a greasy fuck and too old for you, but I’ve never seen anyone as in love as that man is.”
“I’ve told you before, Harlan, it’s not grease, it’s hair gel.” But he laughed all the same. Harlan had hated Nigel the first few visits, but the men had developed a begrudging friendship that seemed to be based around putting each other down and elbowing each other at dinner.
“Adam?”
Adam snapped back to the Cosmic Café, blinking at Felix’s concerned face. Nigel was worth the effort. Felix probably thought Lucy was worth the effort too.
“This isn’t good enough, but I can help you fix it.” Adam pulled the binder closer, scratching out a quick algorithm for a transposition cipher.
When Felix came in the next morning, Adam was sipping tea and discussing optics readings with a few of his colleagues. Bill, the department head, smiled at Felix, stopping the conversation to approach him. “Felix! You engaged?”
Felix smiled. “Yes!”
Emma and Amy clapped. “CONGRATULATIONS!”
Adam offered his hand, shaking Felix’s and clapping the man on the elbow, just like Harlan had taught him when he was eight. “Did she like my cipher?”
Felix looked at Adam and laughed. Adam’s stomach churned unpleasantly. He remembered that laugh from school. It wasn’t a happy laugh. He’d screwed up.
Felix was still laughing as he took his coat off. “Man, Adam, that was a doozy. She couldn’t figure it out and I forgot the substitution algorithm. I ended up playing Clue with her instead, and asking her before bed.”
“Oh. I-” Adam flexed his fingers, trying not to rock. “I’m sorry. I t-thought-”
“Hey man, it’s fine.”
“You wanted it to be special.”
“It was!” Felix smiled. “I got the girl and she says she wants to meet the man that’s a bigger nerd than I am. Hell, we may give that cipher to our kids instead of paying for IQ testing.”
Adam’s breathing evened a little. “Oh…OK, I’d like that.”
Amy nudged Felix with a cup of coffee. “You outsourced your proposal?”
“Fuck outsourcing, you let Adam design the cipher?” Bill laughed. “I bet the CIA couldn’t crack that shit.”
“Oh man, poor Lucy, can you imagine having to crack that?” Emma smiled, turning to wink at Adam. “Promise you won’t do that to Nigel, he’d lose his mind.”
Adam straightened immediately. “Don’t make fun of Nigel.”
Adam didn’t like teasing as a rule. Nigel had explained that it was OK with Harlan and Darko, because it was how they showed affection, but in Adam’s experience, it was just another way people used his misunderstanding of social nuance against him. And Emma wasn’t friends with Nigel, they’d just talked once at the Christmas party.
Emma’s face fell. “Adam, I wasn’t. I just meant that we’re engineers, we like math. People like Nigel and Lucy-”
“Nigel’s not stupid,” Adam said defensively.
“I don’t think he’s stupid!” Emma raised her hands in supplication. “I just meant that Lucy’s an art major and Nigel is a bartender, they’re probably not doing advanced math for fun.”
“Nigel can keep a bar tab in his head all night. He reads people faster than anyone I’ve ever met.” Adam was still frowning, body rocking slightly. “I don’t know Lucy, but she’s probably not stupid either.”
“Adam,” Bill’s voice was soft. “We’re not saying that. We all like Nigel! He taught me that Romanian drinking song.”
“Yeah.” Amy put her empty cup in the sink. “And he showed me how to win at flip cup. No one thinks he’s-”
“I know he doesn’t have an advanced degree, but that doesn’t mean he’s not capable of figuring out codes. He and Darko use codes all the time. When he says lovely lady he means ‘cunt’ and Darko knows to charge her the asshole tax at the bar. And he speaks three languages, he says he’s fluent in cock too, but that doesn’t really count as a language I don’t think… but still, speaking three languages is impressive, that’s basically a substitution cipher.” Adam gulped a breath, steadying himself. “I won’t let anyone make fun of him.”
“I didn’t intend to make fun of him, Adam.” Emma smiled. “I’m sorry.”
Adam looked at Emma’s face. She’d always been nice to him, he didn’t think she’d lie. “It’s OK.”
But it wasn’t.
Nigel was one of the smartest people Adam had ever met, and he wouldn’t rest until his colleagues knew it. Because Nigel was worth the effort.
Adam spent the first month on the algorithm, it was a triple substitution that used a rotating alphabet. Then, he worked on the design. The ring had come in weeks ago, but he had to get the cipher just right before he used it.
When he was confident in the layout and the algorithm, it was time for beta testing. Every lunch for three weeks was spent with his imaging team pouring over the cipher. Emma had gotten it in two days, holding her salad fork in one hand and scratching notes away with the other. Amy had used up a lunch period and a coffee break. Bill had taken four lunch periods. Felix had gotten it in one.
“But Adam,” Emma said as he tweaked the layout. “We know what the message is, so that gives us an unfair advantage when we’re working on it.”
Bill and Felix groaned.
“Oh. I hadn’t thought of that, I need a control group-”
“The new interns,” Bill held up a hand. “NOT the ones working on the data from the Hooker. Give it to the ones that help with the tours.”
Adam nodded.
One intern cried, one quit outright, three eventually figured out the message, and the last asked Adam if he was the Zodiac Killer, which was preposterous because Adam wasn’t born when the first murders took place. Still, the imaging team agreed that this result proved that his cipher was indeed ready for Nigel.
As a rule, Adam wasn’t a fan of parties. They were loud, he felt intense pressure to mingle and decipher social idiosyncrasies, and the food wasn’t familiar. So when Nigel had originally suggested hosting a barbeque, Adam had been horrified.
But Nigel had worked with him. Nigel always worked with him. First, they developed a protocol — a barbeque was an outdoor event, meaning that the noise and the crowds wouldn’t be invading their small house. Adam could go upstairs and sit in a quiet room if he felt overwhelmed and Nigel would take care of the guests so no one would think Adam’s absence was weird. Next, they picked a date. July 20th was perfect. It was the anniversary of the moon landing, which gave Adam a natural topic of conversation, it was far enough away from the Fourth of July to avoid loud fireworks from neighbors, and it was warm enough to cook outdoors. Then, they set a menu. Nigel made sure that beyond burgers and ribs, there was an offering of chicken and plenty of Adam-approved sides, including a catering tray full of mac and cheese. Finally, Nigel was preternaturally good at keeping parties going. He and Darko seemed to know exactly how drunk everyone should be so they would be fun, without getting obnoxious. Nigel had even invented a shot, The Moon Landing, for the event.
Five years later, Adam found himself looking forward to their barbeques. The crushing pressure of interacting with people was nothing when Nigel had an arm looped casually around his shoulders. Last year he hadn’t gone inside to decompress at all, and spent the whole night happily hugged to Nigel’s side.
This year, there was a new reason to be excited. Adam clutched his cipher in his hands as he found Nigel and Darko pouring shots down the Sea of Tranquility Ice Luge.
“Nigel?”
“Fuck off, Janice, don’t lick the goddamn luge,” Nigel turned to smile wide at Adam. “What’s up, gorgeous? Music too loud?”
“No. Uh, I have a game for you.”
“Oh?” Nigel’s smile thinned into something suggestive. “Is it who can undress faster? Because you know I love that game.”
Adam pressed the cipher, a scratchpad, and a pen into Nigel’s chest. “It’s a puzzle.”
“A…puzzle?”
“Yes. I want you to figure it out. If you need a calculator, I can give you my phone.” Nigel looked at Adam for a moment, head cocked. Adam knew the expression, it was the one Nigel used when he’d found a new Adam quirk and was trying to figure out how to deal with it. “I-if you’re busy, it’s o-ok, I sh-should h-”
Nigel kissed him softly, pulling back to smile. “I’m not busy at all, darling. Darko? Will you help that lovely lady with the ice luge? Adam needs me.”
Though he happily kissed Nigel again, something settled oddly in Adam’s stomach. Maybe Emma was right? Adam hated feeling pressured, and it was a challenging cipher. It probably wasn’t fair to spring it on Nigel in front of the whole party. He’d just wanted his colleagues to see Nigel in action. “You d-don’t have to, I can-”
Nigel tightened his grip on Adam, squeezing him into his solid chest.
“I got this, baby,” Nigel growled into Adam’s ear, soft and rumbly enough to make Adam shiver. Adam smiled, feeling himself settle. Nigel’s confidence always helped bolster Adam’s own. He was being silly. Nigel could do it, Adam knew he could.
Nigel strode over to a nearby picnic table and cleared a spot for the scratch pad and cipher. He looked down at the block of numbers, then back at Adam. “Now, what am I doing?”
“It’s a cipher, with a triple substitution-”
“Got it.” Nigel started scratching numbers down on the pad beside him.
“Do you want the algorithm?”
Nigel shook his head, distracted, writing another long sequence of equations.
The party had gone quiet. Adam looked up to see the entire imaging team, his neighbors, and the crowd from the bar gather around to watch Nigel scribble out equations and bite the tip of his pen. Adam fretted. It would be at least another 20 minutes. He should have considered that before he sprung the cipher on Nigel.
“Darling?” Nigel turned eyes wide and a little teary. Adam froze. He hoped he hadn’t embarrassed Nigel in front of their friends. But Nigel’s expression split into a huge smile even as tears cascaded down his cheeks. “OF COURSE I’LL FUCKING MARRY YOU!”
Adam didn’t have time to feel relieved before he was snatched into a bear hug. Distantly, he could hear Amy saying No Way and Bill making a joke about offering Nigel a job. He laughed as Nigel swung him around their yard, pressing kisses and Romanian love vows into his neck. When Nigel finally put him down, the world was spinning, but Adam didn’t mind, as long as he had Nigel to steady him. “I-I have a ring.”
He pulled the ring out of his pocket, smiling when Nigel eagerly held out his hand. “It’s dinosaur bone and meteorite.”
“Darling, it’s perfect. Me and you, together forever.” Nigel took his mouth softly, the cool feel of his engagement ring a pleasant sensation on Adam’s cheek. “I love you.”
“I love you too.” Adam flinched slightly when the crowd exploded into cheers, but the smile stayed on his face. Adam glanced over at the imaging team. Bill and Amy were crying. Felix and Emma were high-fiving. “I have to go.”
“Go?” Nigel frowned. “You just fucking proposed to me, where are you going?”
“I told Emma you’d get the cipher. I have to uh-”
“Be a little shit and rub it in?”
Adam smiled. “Yes.”
Nigel grinned wide. “Fine. Go brag to your friends, I’ve gotta show Darko my fucking ring.”
Nigel slapped Adam on the ass, waving to the imaging team as he made his way to Darko.
The party had more or less resumed. People were eating at the picnic tables, a group of kids was playing cornhole at the edge of the yard, and a few of the drunker attendees were attempting what Nigel thought might be some unholy combo of the electric slide and the cupid shuffle.
He’d let himself be slapped on the back and hugged for a good fifteen minutes. After all, it wasn’t every day that a man got engaged. When the adulation had finally died down, he moved to the edge of the party, where Darko reclined in a lawn chair, a beer in one hand and his feet propped on a cooler.
Nigel kicked Darko’s feet off the cooler as he settled into the lawn chair next to him, ignoring his friend’s cussing as he admired the ring on his hand. Darko sat up, rummaging in the cooler before emerging with a beer. Popping the top, he handed it to Nigel.
“Congratulations, you fuck. You don’t deserve him.”
Nigel took the beer, leaning into the creaking lawn chair. “I know.”
Darko nodded to Adam, who was still talking to his coworkers, gesticulating toward Nigel every now and then and puffing his chest out like the cock of the walk. “Silly kid is still fucking bragging about your worthless ass.”
“I know.”
“You’re a lucky fuck you found that ring last week.”
Nigel snorted, tucking his chin to smile at the ring he’d been wearing all week when Adam wasn’t home. “I fucking know.”
Darko held his beer out, Nigel clinked his in a little toast. They drank in silence for a few minutes. “You ever gonna tell him?”
Nigel stretched his legs out, propping them on the cooler next to Darko’s. “He’ll figure it out by tonight.”
Darko raised a brow over his glasses. Nigel grinned.
“He’ll want to get my equations framed, so he’ll keep them. And when he looks at it tonight, he’ll realize I just scribbled a bunch of shit on the paper to buy time.”
“What the fuck did you write?”
“My old cell number, Gabi’s bra size, the combination of my gym locker, Jupiter’s mass, and the number of moons in the solar system…random shit.”
“Is he gonna be pissed?”
“Adam?” Nigel grinned, waving back when his little darling turned to wave at him before he went back to bragging. “Nah. He’ll tell me he’s proud of my…the fuck did he call it? Emotional intelligence? Some shit like that. He’s always impressed by how I can read situations. Worst case, he’ll tell me he’s proud of me, but I shouldn’t lie…then he’ll suck my cock till my toes curl.”
Darko scoffed. “What the fuck is the best case?”
Nigel’s grin spread wide. “He’ll tie me up and give me a spanking before he fucks me, so I’ll learn my lesson.”
“Well, I’m off my fucking beer, now, I hope you’re happy.” Darko tossed his empty into the open bin by the street. “Congratulations, you fuck, I’m going to do shots off the ice luge until I forget that disgusting fucking image.”
Nigel waved his friend off, eyes trained on Adam. He glanced at his ring, the one he could officially wear all the time now, not just furtively when Adam was at work. He had a matching band in his pocket, that he’d give to Adam tonight, as they lay in the moonlight. He loved his man for wanting to brag about him, but he knew Adam would like it better if he got to enjoy his ring in the quiet of their room. And even if it meant delaying a few more hours to hear Adam’s delighted gasp and excited chattering about their wedding, Nigel was willing to wait. Adam Raki was nothing if not worth the effort.