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Humidity like this was a threat. Sesshoumaru found the storm, and flew into the deluge. Rain brought a cacophony of odors. Water washed away all evidence of presence and proceedings, yet paradoxically, rain enhanced the mundane scents of dirt and ozone, twisting them together to create that overpowering petrichor. Himself a streak of light in the night, Sesshoumaru pressed onwards, spurred by the faint scent of blood.
When he finally landed, the heft of his corporeal body bore down on the earth with greater force than his usual habit. His boots sank into the mud.
This close, the aromas were sweet.
Sesshoumaru’s hackles relaxed.
Natural wood oils, ordinarily dormant within cut and sanded planks, rose from fresh breaks. Rin had taken to rinsing her hair with rose water to make her scent floral and appealing, though the enhancement was far from necessary. To her lover, even the metallic bouquet of her blood was enticing.
The strength of that particular scent was courtesy of a hair thin cut marring her cheek. As an injury, it was negligible; as a call to arms, formidable. Despite his tardiness, no sign of the assailant remained and Sesshoumaru could not find further proof of an attack on her person.
Rin had fared far better than her home.
The modest hut at the base of the shrine was half-collapsed. Two of the walls were torn open. Many of the stones from the roof had fallen from the crumbing slope with enough force to embed themselves within the floorboards. Rin and her companions huddled beneath what was left of the roof, speaking in tones hushed and urgent. In the aftermath of battle, the doddering old priestess and feisty young one were solution oriented.
Sesshoumaru did not wonder what had become of this enemy.
Tessaiga perched on Inuyasha’s shoulder, the blade black as a starfield.
Sheathed at his hip, Sesshomaru’s own swords were inert and unnecessary.
Rin’s arm rose to absently wipe errant hairs clinging to her damp skin. The hem of her sleeve was torn. Perhaps it had been caught on splintered wood when her home was crushed while she slept.
“You’re late.” Inuyasha, insolent cur he was, tossed his head. Meeting Sesshoumaru’s eyes, he sheathed Tessaiga with a flourish. “It’s all taken care of.”
“Sesshoumaru-sama!” Rin teetered when she noticed him, the broken floor rocking beneath her feet. “You’re here!” She took a few careful steps, as though testing where she could safely walk, before throwing off any semblance of caution and bounding from the pitiful shelter to run barefoot into the mud. It squelched with her every step.
Inuyasha’s wife hollered after her. “Rin-chan! We’re going to take Kaede-sama home with us!” Kagome crouched and shifted through the items strewn about the floor. She picked up a heavy kimono and draped it over the old woman’s head and shoulders.
The rain pelted Rin. She twisted, looking back at Kagome. “Okay!”
Wearing a slight frown, Kagome called, “Big brother, don’t keep Rin-chan too long! Walk her to our house, alright?”
For her part, Rin appeared to have little interest in Kagome’s instructions. The trio left, hurrying across the bridge towards the other side of the village. Despite the offer to open their home to her, Rin’s attention remained fixed on Sesshoumaru. Cool, gentle fingers caressed his cheeks. Long would he have welcomed her touch, but innate respect for him had checked any desires Rin harbored. Perhaps she had not understood or appreciated her power over him until he made his own intentions known. The shift in their relationship from friendly to courting was still new and intriguing.
His hair had grown heavy with water. Rin seemed captivated by the way it dripped from the ends of his fringe and ran in wide rivulets down his face.
Sesshoumaru caught her wrist, blocking the frayed sleeve from his view.
It had been a clever beast, her assailant. To attack during a violent rainstorm demonstrated real insight into the limitations of a dog youkai’s nose. They had every reason to be confident Sesshoumaru would not get to Rin in time. Underestimating Inuyasha had been their fatal mistake. So many youkai saw a hanyou as no greater threat than a human.
Nose red, Rin sniffled. Her eyelashes were gummed together by water. The rain had plastered her hair to her forehead. Her sodden yukata stuck to her skin. Seemingly unconcerned by the crumbling house behind her or how the mud was flecked as far up as her ankles, Rin stood, staring up at Sesshoumaru, rhythmically stroking his cheek with her thumb.
“Rin.”
She blinked. If she had been put under a spell, his voice roused her from it. Rin twisted her wrist to catch his hand in her own and spun, leading him to the precarious shelter of the hut.
The chest of drawers Sesshoumaru had given her to store her clothing was crushed, the kimono spilling out torn and stained. A broken mirror lay on the floor. The oil lamps were knocked over. Rin walked on her toes around broken bits of pottery.
All he had wished was to protect this one life.
By loving her, Sesshoumaru had placed her in the greatest danger. As long as she was his, Rin would be a target. There would be others, monsters who knew they could not face one such as Sesshoumaru head on. Even if he later enacted bloody vengeance, to be remembered as the one who killed this single human woman would be a timeless victory.
Gingerly, Rin lowered herself to her knees on the unsteady floor. She rooted around the possessions strewn about, until grunting, she pulled a towel free from beneath a beam. “Here, Sesshoumaru-sama!” Rin rocked to her feet and proudly presented him with her prize. When he did not take the offering, she scampered behind him.
Rin wrung his hair out in sections, beginning with the loose hanging locks at his upper back. She moved the towel lower, and squeezed again. “Ah, kneel down, please, Sesshoumaru-sama. I should have started at the top.”
How like Rin to think nothing of her own tragedies and focus instead on caring for him!
Sesshoumaru sat cross-legged on the floor.
Rin made a mournful sound. “Oh…your hakama will get dirty. I hadn’t thought of that.”
“It is of no consequence.”
Humming unenthused agreement, Rin ruffled Sesshoumaru’s bangs with her towel.
“Everything will be alright,” she said quietly. “We can rebuild. Because of earthquakes, humans make their houses easy to repair.”
Sesshoumaru waited.
Her god had failed to protect her.
Rin was too soft-hearted for anger when she was wronged, and he hardly expected a reprimand. Still, she could not be silent.
“Inuyasha-sama and Kagome-sama are very kind; they won’t mind houseguests. It will be fun! Do you remember how Inuyasha-sama lived with Kaede-sama and I before Kagome-sama came back?” She worked the towel downwards. “All of us living together will be like having a big family.”
Rin wore a white yukata to bed. She used an old kimono as a blanket. Passively sitting, allowing Rin to work out her anxieties on his hair, Sesshoumaru spied a heap of pink cloth he recognized. It appeared to have been thrown from her futon, itself shredded not long after she vacated. Doubtless when Rin went to sleep that night, she had curled up beneath that pink kimono.
He liked Rin in pink. It brought out the rosyness of her blush, the plumpness of her lips. How secure she must have felt, wrapped in the tokens of her lover’s affection.
“It all happened so fast.” Her hands stilled. Sesshoumaru felt the towel hit the ground behind him. Rin slid against his back, his body a greater shelter than the ruins of the house. Her breath tickled the back of his neck. “I barely had time to be scared.”
Could she read his mind? Had Rin heard his thoughts, realized she must account for her failure to condemn him?
“I was sleeping.” Her voice was admirably steady, but soft. “I was woken up by a roaring sound. At first, I thought I was dreaming. Kaede-sama and I got up, and we ran to the other side of the house. It was dark, and we couldn’t see what was happening. The walls caved in, and Inuyasha-sama appeared…”
Pale hands crept across his torso. Sesshoumaru saw rather than felt her squeeze, youkai armor too strong to yield to a human hug.
“I’m sorry,” Rin whispered.
Sesshoumaru stiffened.
“It all happened so fast. I didn’t – I didn’t even think of you.” Rin shifted, her forehead pressed to his shoulder blade. “Sesshoumaru-sama came anyway.” A shaky laugh followed. “Of course you did. Sesshoumaru-sama is the most reliable. You are always there for me.”
He covered her hands with his own. Her fingers were so cold and delicate.
“Rin.”
“Yes?”
“You are talking a lot.”
She faltered. “It makes me feel brave. Isn’t that silly? I feel more scared now than I did when it was happening. I was half-asleep!” Rin exhaled forcefully. “I don’t think I even knew what was going on until it was over. I never got a good glimpse of the youkai. But now, it’s like time has slowed down, and I’m wide awake. I keep thinking about how I could have died without seeing you again or saying good-bye.”
“You cannot stay here.”
Her palm slapped his cuirass. “Of course not! That’s why Kagome-sama said I should come to her house!”
His pelt surrounded Rin. She squealed as it wound around her hips and legs, scooped her up and deposited Rin across his lap.
“Your fur is all wet!” she cried.
Not any more so than either of their clothes, but nevertheless, Sesshoumaru dissolved the pelt into pure youki and formed a new one. The fur he willed into existence was flocculent, an admirable testament to his strength, though more immediate to Rin’s concerns, untouched by rain. It circled her, and she took one end into her arms and settled it onto her lap. She stroked it, perhaps taking comfort in the familiar warmth of his pelt, perhaps simply exploring this new addition to his body. The fur rolled over her lap, offering more of itself for her attention.
“I would make a place for you,” Sesshoumaru said.
For years, he had accepted the wisdom of leaving Rin in the village, under the care of the old priestess and the protection of Inuyasha. Indeed, the hanyou had come through tonight, killing the beast before Sesshoumaru had caught the scent of Rin’s spilled blood. Yet Sesshoumaru could not knowingly leave her behind again, feigning ignorance of the danger. As their circumstances changed, so too must his assessment of her living arrangements.
Rin carded her fingers through his fur. “Do you mean a home of our own?”
“It is time.”
She shivered, a joyful tremor moving through her body. “Sesshoumaru-sama, how wonderful! A place you and I could live together!”
Her eyes shone with delight. No longer was she a haunted creature, afraid of a danger which had passed. Sesshoumaru had offered Rin future happiness, and her resilient heart cared only for that. Cupping her cheek, he drew her contented face to him. They sealed the promise with a chaste kiss. A satisfied smile graced Rin’s lips when he released her.
Relishing the moment, she did not immediately open her eyes. Once Rin did, her body came alive with purpose. She swung her legs to stand. “We have to tell Kaede-sama! And Inuyasha-sama and Kagome-sama! All of us living together will be like having a big family, but when you and I have our own home, we will welcome so many children that it will be the real thing!”
She turned her bright eyes outward, towards the other homes. The absent walls framed a picture of the village, dim light and torrential rain no impediment to his own vision. It was a dismal place which had never deserved her. Should she see anything, let it be that her presence had been a beacon this community never deserved.
“It’s so late,” Rin continued. “Kaede-sama must be settled by now. I hope she’s not asleep. I don’t want to wait until tomorrow to tell her our news.”
She grabbed the pink kimono and, with elbows bent at her temples, created a tent to protect herself from the storm. Rin stepped gingerly into the mud, never looking back to see if Sesshoumaru was still with her, trusting completely that he followed.
Laughing, Rin ran into the rain, but soon slowed, that pace not sustainable to carry her the entire way. The tent, too, she discarded, instead wrapping the kimono around her shoulders. Rin stopped, seemingly to simply appreciate being pelted by rain.
“We,” she declared, turning to Sesshoumaru, “will have a garden.”
“As you like.”
Rin grinned. She wiped her face with the kimono, and immediately, any drying effect was undone.
She ran forwards again, a few steps, and then stopped to turn to him. “And,” Rin added, “our home must be near a river.” She gasped. “Oh! We should live further upstream from this river here in the village, so that we are close to our friends, but not too close.” Rin wrinkled her nose. “Sesshoumaru-sama likes his space. And Kaede-sama can probably do without me. I’ve been helping her for a long time, but she was doing her work alone for much longer."
It was an appreciation for life that propelled her. The old kimono granted no protection from the rain. It was soon as sodden as her yukata and hair. The dirt roads of the village were dotted with puddles where they were not mud, yet Rin danced through it all without concern. The typical human avoided walking in a rainstorm, and when it could not be avoided, they wore hats and capes of straw.
Having once again narrowly avoided death, Rin relished the storm.
“I’ve heard,” she said, “that human samurai put their armor and swords on stands. Will you do that when you come home? It’s so hard to picture! I wonder what Sesshoumaru-sama will be like at home!”
Rin walked purposefully into a puddle, stopping to rinse mud off her feet and calves. She was hardly any cleaner stepping out than she had been stepping in, and what little good it did was soon undone.
“I’ve barely seen you go inside,” she continued. “And you never seem really comfortable there. Because it’s someone else’s space, I’ve thought. Sesshoumaru-sama is at home everywhere he goes, unless it is someone else’s home. When we’re in the mountains, you’re at home, and when we’re in a forest, that’s your home, and when we’re in our house, that will be your home!”
Rin froze.
The joy ran from her face. Brow furrowed, Rin whispered, “You wouldn’t like this at all, would you?”
The domestic fantasies she had concocted were her own. Sesshoumaru had not said anything of staying, bound and leashed, but the need to guard her implied it. A shiro he abandoned would be no safer than a village left to its own devices. How well he liked it was of no consequence. It was a matter of necessity.
“Nonsense.”
With a shake of her head, Rin insisted, “No, listen. Sesshoumaru-sama likes to roam. Your home is wherever you happen to be, and that’s how you like it. You’re always looking for something. Can you imagine what it would be like to stay in one place, where it’s safe, never seeking out strong enemies anymore? Sesshoumaru-sama would be restless.”
“Your safety is more important.”
“I am safe. I hear you, Sesshoumaru-sama.” Rin slicked wet hair back from her face. “But I am safe here. Just because Sesshoumaru-sama is the strongest doesn’t mean other people aren’t strong enough. It’s so safe here that I didn’t even know I should have been scared until it was all over. I can’t ask you to sacrifice all your happiness for nothing.”
Rin was his happiness.
The kimono slipped low around her shoulders. Surrounded by dirt roads and simple huts, Rin spread her arms wide. “Look at this place! It’s so vibrant! I made a life here.” Though his eyes were far sharper than her own, Sesshoumaru could see no riches. “It’s never boring. The work Kaede-sama and I do means something to this community.” She folded her hands against her chest. “When you left me here, I never thought I could think of humans as friends or family, but I can. And I do.”
Dread poured down his spine in icy waves. A moment ago, Rin had been dreaming of their children and now she was turning away. Sesshoumaru had known her human life would be brief. He could not have foreseen their love affair could be so fleeting, nary more than a moment in her short life. Yet, he remained still. The impulse to reach out and reclaim her was ultimately suppressed by hard-won dignity. If she wished to leave him, Sesshoumaru would never demean himself so low as to ask her to reconsider.
Oblivious to his turmoil, Rin giggled heedlessly. “And think of poor Jaken-sama! Can you imagine if we had our little house, out in the wilderness somewhere, just the three of us? You and I would fill it with babies, and he’d have to help care for them. That won’t do at all! Don’t tell him I said so, but if I needed help with a child, I’d much rather have Kaede-sama.”
Clasping her hands behind her back, Rin solemnly swore, “So I won’t be afraid.”
She had always been brave. Too many times had Sesshoumaru seen her run headlong into danger. A timid woman never could have endured him.
Rin reached out and took his hand. Reverently, she brought his knuckles to her lips. Her eyes drifted shut. She uncurled his fingers, displaying such comfort and familiarity with razor sharp claws, and fearlessly pressed his palm to her cheek. “When you are lonely, come to me, and I’ll love you. When you are weary, come lay your head on my lap. Bring me all your victories and hopes and losses. Make me part of a family again. When we are apart, I won’t be afraid. I promise.”
A mortal life was such a fragile thing. From where did she find the strength to always think of others before herself? The warm skin beneath his hand was as delicate as the wings of a butterfly, yet he found he could not argue with her. Rin’s devotion and loyalty were unequivocal. Who would question his place in her heart?
Pressing a kiss to the heel of his hand, Rin said, “I love you, Sesshoumaru-sama, and I love the life you gave me. I’m happy here, and I can stay in the village and love you.”
His greatest desire was to protect her life, to see Rin’s essence continue unabated through the ages. She had become a source of inspiration, a well from which to draw power, a precious prize to cherish.
“Rin.”
Love was a beautiful agony. So casually, she seemed to have declared his every instinct irrelevant. Rin had cast off his role as her protector. And though that did not, could never, kill the desire within his breast, it was almost a relief to be dismissed from that duty. Rin would not chide him for his failures or wonder why he had not saved her. Companionship was all she truly desired from him. That his wanderings should inevitably bring him to her side, time and time again, was enough.
Sesshoumaru was bound, perhaps, but never chained.
Claws carding their way through her hair, Sesshoumaru cupped the back of Rin’s head and pulled her towards him. The late hour and the ongoing storm granted a privacy which the heart of the village could not often boast.
A moment spent with Rin could not be rushed, and he took his time relishing the sweetness she offered. Neither were in any hurry to reach their destination, but the steady rain meant it could not be put off indefinitely. When they did arrive, the bamboo mat was pulled aside by the young priestess with an immediacy that suggested she had been looking for them and an irritability that implied she’d expected them sooner. For her part, Rin was all graciousness, bowing in the genkan and profusely thanking her hosts for their hospitality.
It was a modest house, larger than the crumbling hut but far smaller than what Rin deserved. Standing in the genkan allowed Sesshoumaru to see the full scope of the interior, a single room divided by a screen. The other guest, lacking Rin’s vitality, was long asleep. Inuyasha sat in a far corner, himself and Tessaiga propped against a wall, a single eye opening only briefly to acknowledge them.
“I’m sorry to be coming in so wet and dirty,” Rin added. Both her feet and the hem of her yukata were caked in mud.
“You couldn’t have avoided it on a night like this,” Kagome assured her. “ We weren’t any better. Here, we’ve got a basin of water all ready. You can wash up and change into something dry.”
Rin sat on the edge of the raised platform. “Thank you again.” Her hands made quick work of washing her feet while Kagome procured fresh clothes.
Rin was cared for among her friends. Despite the circumstances, there was a pervasive sense of the ordinary in how Kagome anticipated Rin’s needs. The atmosphere was one of simplicity and camaraderie. Rin accepted a dry yukata with a half-remembered story of the last time she had seen Kagome wear it.
“Change, ” Kagome insisted, her arm urging Rin towards the screen. “And get some sleep. It’s been quite a night.”
Rin dashed across the floor on her toes, leaving droplets in her wake. Kagome watched her disappear behind the screen, then turned to Sesshoumaru. “Thanks for walking Rin-chan over. We’ll take it from here.”
“Took you long enough!” Inuyasha added, eyes still closed.
Kagome glared at him. “They had a lot to talk about! Can you blame them?”
The cur only shrugged. “Well, it’s done now, so he can go.”
Rin was safe. She had chosen to stay deliberately. When Sesshoumaru left, she would sleep soundly, assured as ever in his loyalty. Cherishing her kept him bound to return, but never chained. In choosing to stay, Rin sacrificed nothing. Sesshoumaru could take his leave, knowing Rin would still be his when he returned.
Like a mirage, Rin emerged from behind the screen with glowing skin and damp, tousled hair. The yukata, made for a taller, broader woman, was cinched tightly around Rin’s waist, her own figure lost amid the gaps and creases. Rin met his eyes and laughed.
“In my own time,” Sesshoumaru replied.