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Jimin is to be held accountable for this, really. Before Jungkook left for his classes this morning, he swears there were plenty of groceries in the fridge and cupboards. Or so Jungkook thought, because the picture Jimin texts proves different. He doesn’t quite understand why Jimin can’t leave whatever kitchen creation he’s currently working on. It’s a quick stop at the store, just down the street from their shared apartment, but Jimin begs and promises to share his feast with Jungkook tonight if he stops after class.
That’s the only reason why Jungkook agrees. But Jimin— that dickhead— who swears it is just a few things outright lied. Because now somehow Jungkook’s cart is full of food and Jimin is still texting him sporadic one-word items to the ever-growing grocery list, causing Jungkook to run all over the store to retrieve them. Just when he thinks the madness is finally over, his phone chimes in his pocket and Jungkook’s fingers clench tighter around the shopping cart.
He’s sure Jimin doesn’t need half the things he insisted on, but he’s been watching the youtube tutorials and claims to be on track to becoming a professional chef. It’s admittedly better than the diy home renovation kick he was on before (rip to their half bathroom), and Jungkook doesn’t have it in him to tell his childhood best friend to fuck off.
That may be changing after his third trip to the spice section. Jungkook returns the garlic powder and basil and just grabs 'all spice' because if the name is anything to go by, it’s all Jimin should realistically need.
Of course, it’s the longest and busiest day of Jungkook’s week, having finished his classes at six, and he has an online reading quiz due in four hours. He hasn’t even started anything. Fuck his life, honestly.
Finally, he arrives at the check-out counter where there is only one register open with a long line of customers. Because of fucking course.
There’s a single cashier quickly scanning groceries and pausing to bag them all up. Unfortunately, he’s more than a little clumsy and when he tries to bag faster, he ends up ripping the flimsy plastic handles or poking holes through the sides.
“Oops. Sorry about that.” The clerk tosses the entire ripped bag and its contents into a new blue bag. He smiles at the older woman in front of him and shoots her fingerguns. “Thanks for shopping with us.”
His phone chimes again, two times in quick succession. Jungkook can’t stop himself from rolling his eyes. He checks his texts to see four new food requests from Jimin, so he responds with an eloquent ‘fuck you’ before pocketing it and returning his attention to the line. He physically has to stop himself from tapping his foot.
He has a better view of the cashier now. He’s a tall, fair guy maybe around his age with these broad as fuck shoulders, anybody would knock off into if passed aside him. His brown hair curls tucked by his ears, partially obscured by the store’s standard issued orange cap. The black uniform is a button-down shirt, and it’s off by one button causing the right side to pull down a little, exposing his collar bone.
Despite shopping here for the past two semesters, Jungkook has never seen him here before. Not that Jungkook frequents the grocery store or anything. That’s Jimin’s job now.
The cashier seems pleasant enough, maybe even too much so. He’s laughing– squawking(?)- loudly with his head thrown back in response to something the current customer said. Jungkook can’t imagine what would warrant a laugh that loud. Even if it’s kinda cute.
As he gets closer to the front of the line, he puts up the divider on the conveyor belt between his groceries and the ones from the woman in front of him. He busies himself by taking his items out of his cart.
The woman has only a few essential items, but she’s clearly impatient. She’s shifting her weight from one foot to the other, and switching from twisting on her gold necklace to checking her wristwatch.
“Good evening!” The cashier greets her, and it seems like his laugh isn’t the only thing that’s loud. “Do you prefer paper or plastic?”
“I brought my own.” She says, holding up a fabric tote bag covered with bright yellow smiling emojis. Her lips are pursed as she sets the tote in the bagging area. It collapses immediately.
The cashier tries to make small talk, but the woman shuts his attempt down with a disgusted scoff. When the total amount due pops up on the screen, she drops exact change on the counter. The clerk scoops up the change and deposits it clumsily into the cash drawer.
After he’s done, he goes to place the items in her bag. Suddenly, she smacks his hands away with a loud slap sound. Surprised, the cashier pulls them to his chest protectively as little red finger marks stain his hands. Jungkook stares at her as she bags her own items, a frown tugging on the corner of his lips. His own impatience drains from his body.
“Thanks for shopping at—” She snatches the receipt from the guy’s hand, nearly ripping it in the process and storms toward the exit.
The cashier lets out a startled, strangled sound that gets caught in his throat. “Okay… did you bring your own bag, too?” He asks hesitantly, as he turns his attention for the first time to Jungkook. His dark eyes go impossibly wide when their gazes meet.
He has gorgeous eyes. And gorgeous face. And gorgeous voice. And Jungkook's already gone.
“Plastic is fine.” Jungkook scratches the back of his neck and looks to see if anyone is in line behind him. There’s not. “Sorry that lady was such a bitch. She really soured the mood around here.”
The cashier smiles, a wide grin with a small dimple at the corner. Jungkook feels himself smiling in return. “Forget her. We’ll see if we can turnip around with some a-maize-ing food puns.” He scans Jungkook’s vegetables and holds them in either hand for Jungkook to see.
Jungkook’s mouth must twitch in disinterest, because the cashier continues, “Don’t be salty about my great food puns. I’m clearly on a roll.” He scans the table salt and dinner rolls and they join the vegetables in front of the plastic bags.
The cashier appraises each item before rattling off a different pun without hesitation, completely in line with his monologue, then tosses the food to the bagging area. Jungkook is silent, but has yet to put a stop to the shenanigans. It’s strange because he doesn’t normally have a tolerance for stuff like this. Instead, the cashier has his complete and undivided attention.
“Don’t mind me. I’m just hamming it up.” He holds up the lunch meat and displays it like it's on the Wheel of Fortune before saying, “Okay, I get it. You think I’m just milking it for attention.”
Jungkook lets out a thinly veiled snort. He shakes his head and finally looks down to his shoes, trying his best to hide his smile. Is this guy for real?
“Oh. Was that a laugh I heard? Are my jokes ap-peel-ing to you?” He pauses to use the scale to weigh the bananas. He looks up at Jungkook to ridiculously wiggle his eyebrows.
Jungkook finally cracks at that, a full laugh, and concedes, “You’re quick on your feet. Definitely less cringey than I thought this would be.”
“I’ll count that as a win. Feel free to join in!” The cashier slides the can of noodle soup across the scanner. “Don’t be chicken.”
“Are you allowed to branch out to knock-knock jokes? Or does the store limit you to food specific puns?” Jungkook asks as the guy starts to bag his items up.
The line behind him is still empty, and the cashier works slower now and seems more focused. Jungkook tries not to stare at his long, slender fingers wrapping around the canned goods. The clerk uses one of those long fingers to tuck his hair strands that keep falling in front of his eyes again and again.
“I’m gifted with all forms of comedy. I also make scientific puns,” He places the last item in the plastic bag. “But only periodically.”
Jungkook does groan at that one, but instead of pained, it comes out amused. He refuses to dwell on it. “And you were doing so well.” Jungkook inserts his debit card in the chip reader and waits for the machine to approve the payment.
“Did it brighten your day a little?” When Jungkook nods, a grin slowly spreads across the clerk’s face, so wide it makes his eyes crinkle in the corners. “Good. Will I be seeing you again….?”
“Jungkook.”
The cashier’s voice is oddly soft for the moment they’re sharing, “It’s nice to meet you, Jungkook-ssi.”
At the sound of his name, Jungkook’s heart thunders in his chest. He reaches out to take his receipt, and just misses brushing their fingers together before the guy retracts his hand.
His gaze flits up to the guy’s name tag. Written on the black background in perfectly neat handwriting is the name, Namjoon. “It’s nice to meet you, too, Namjoon-ssi.”
“What?” The guy looks surprised and covers up his name tag with both hands. Jungkook momentarily gets distracted by the long digits again before his brain catches up to the conversation. “Oh, my name’s not Namjoon.”
Jungkook frowns, unsure what to do with that information. “Then why does your name tag—”
“Namjoon's the guy in the floral department, over by the greeting cards. He really knows his plants. And birds. But we don’t sell those here.” He scratches the back of his neck. “I couldn’t find my name tag so he let me borrow his.” Not-Namjoon pauses before adding with his fingerguns, “I guess you could say he rose to the occasion.”
A small smile returns to Jungkook’s lips, and he starts loading his arms with blue plastic bags. “Okay, then whose name tag is he wearing?”
“Namjoon’s off the clock. He’s great at finding my name tag though. Just last week, he found mine from under the couch on the living room floor and just wore it instead.”
“Oh.. so you and him?” Jungkook leans back, letting his arms drop. The weight of the bags pulls his arms down to his sides. There aren’t many platonic reasons why your clothes or your name tag would be on someone else’s living room floor.
The cashier looks up, eye brows raised at the sudden distance between them. “Me and Joon? Roommates!” He declares cheerfully. “Best friends since childhood. Besides, I think Yoongi in Customer Service over there would beat me up for stealing his boyfriend.”
Cute cashier nods over to the Service Counter, where a guy with black hair is flipping through a magazine.
“He’s tougher than he looks.”
The smile returns to Jungkook's face and he collects the rest of his bags. “So if you’re not Namjoon, then what's your name?”
“Guess you’ll have to come back to find out.” The cashier winks and turns away from him. Jungkook turns to find a line of customers behind him, and the guy is assisting the next one.
He smiles when he hears the cashier isn’t playing their game any longer. He selfishly thinks it was just for him. He heads out the door, wondering the name of his charming mystery guy.
When Jungkook returns home, Jimin is scrubbing dishes in the sink and a delicious scent lingers in the air. Yeah, he could definitely get behind this new hobby, especially if it meant Jimin was cleaning up more around the house.
He spares a passing look of pity to their non-functional half bathroom Jimin ‘improved’ three months ago. The toilet now works like a bidet and Jungkook certainly didn’t ask for that surprise. At least this new hobby comes with actual perks.
“You can put these away, and I’ll take a plate of whatever smells good.” Jungkook says as he deposits the grocery bags unceremoniously on the kitchen countertop. “I’ve got that reading quiz to finish by ten.”
Jimin doesn’t look up from the pot he’s scrubbing with steel wool. His tongue pokes out and he’s staring in concentration.
“Have fun with that. You know.. you could just search up tips on google on how to do it, no?”
“You can talk shit or you can eat.” Jimin finally looks up at him over his shoulder, his fingers still gripped around the water sprayer, brandishing it like a weapon. “You don’t get both.”
Jungkook thinks for a minute, then snaps his mouth shut and busies himself by grabbing a plate. He steps around Jimin to grab a bottle of water from the refrigerator as well.
“Did you get everything I texted you?” Jimin fills the pot with water and lets it soak. He peers into the plastic bags. “I want to make stuffed salmon fillets on Saturday.”
Jungkook steels Jimin with a look, as he piles his plate with even more steaming food. “What the fuck? Hyung, you didn’t send anything about fish.”
“I did too!” Jimin’s head whips up, as his hands reach for his phone. “Check the last three texts I sent you. Jungkook! That’s the most important part of the dish!” He holds up their text conversation, with Jungkook’s last message having been previously unread.
“Sorry, hyung. I think I got most of everything else though.”
Jimin shrugs, sets his phone back down, and flexes his fingers. “It’s okay. I’ll stop by the store tomorrow after school and get the missing stuff for the recipe. Their meat department has a wide selection, so it’s actually better if I go anyway. It's no big deal.”
“No!” Jungkook says, choking on his last bite of food. Jimin stares at him, arm rising up to pat him on the back. Jungkook coughs and swallows forcefully. “I mean, it was my mistake. I’ll go back on Friday and pick up the ingredients. Just make out an actual paper list, cause knowing you I know the list will triple by then.”
“But you hate grocery shopping.” Jimin opens the fridge and places the milk inside. “You sent me, like, twelve angry emojis when I asked you to stop today.”
“That doesn’t sound like me.” Jimin reaches for his phone to show him the texts again, but Jungkook turns away from his questioning gaze and his proof. “Well maybe I decided I liked it. I’m allowed to change my mind, hyung.”
“You don’t find it therapeutic like I do.” He could hear the confusion in Jimin’s voice. “I mean, I love going to the store and trading recipes with the employees behind the counter. You probably hate how the cans are covered in dust and how everything isn’t washed before it’s set on the shelves.”
Now Jungkook is definitely thinking about that. He shoves another bite of roast in his mouth and pushes the intrusive thoughts of uncleanliness away. “Listen. It’s my fault I forgot the fish. You shouldn’t have to make another trip because I forgot some stuff. That’s all. This is really good by the way. I can taste... all the spices and shit. It’s delicious.”
Jimin stops what he’s doing and comes around the bar to look at him. The patented Jimin smile is creeping up on his face. His voice is low and teasing. “Did something happen at the store today, Jungkookie?”
“No. Nothing. Just excited about vegetables and seafood or whatever.” Jimin isn’t buying it, but Jungkook pushes past him, pushes down the embarrassment and all the thoughts of the cashier. “It’s homework time. Write me a list, yeah? I’ll go on Friday.” He practically closes his bedroom door in Jimin’s face.
“You’ll have to tell me eventually. I know where you live!” Jimin says from the other side of the door, then taps twice on the wood for emphasis. He pauses before hesitantly adding, “I’ll leave the list on the counter for you.”
Jungkook allows the smile to creep back onto his face. “Thanks, hyung.”
Two evenings later, Jungkook is back in the grocery store filling a basket with odds and ends, pausing to cross the items off the paper list. He is taking his time because when he first walked in, he didn’t see his mystery guy at any of the check-out lanes. Maybe he was on his lunch break or in the bathroom.
He makes it a point to swing past the floral department, hoping to catch a glimpse of the infamous Namjoon. If anything, he’ll know what kind of people the mystery guy hangs out with. There’s a guy arranging roses in a large red vase. As he nears, he can see his name tag reads Taehyung in chunky, green letters. He briefly wonders if the real Namjoon is here somewhere, if it’s his day off, or if Taehyung is actually Namjoon, especially if no one gave a shit about wearing the correct name tags in this store, but Jungkook continues to the checkout counters.
Two lanes are open today, but neither is run by the mystery guy. Jungkook frowns, wondering if the guy only works late evenings or something, or maybe he has the night off and is getting ready for a date. It is a Friday after all. A handsome, charismatic guy like him, Jungkook wouldn’t be surprised if he was already someone’s boyfriend.
With a long-suffering sigh, Jungkook gets into the lane with the longest line, still holding out hope the guy would make an appearance. He cranes his head around, attempting casual, but probably missing the mark. There’s a long hallway where the employee’s break room must be and from where he stands, he has a good view of the time clock and a schedule written on a whiteboard, but without the guy’s name, it's no help.
By the time he checks-out, the mystery guy is still missing. Instead, he’s helped by a guy with silver hair. He scans his items leisurely, like he’s endlessly bored with the task. He looks at the clerk’s name tag to see Hoseok written in wispy red ink and little hearts in the corners.
“Were you looking for someone?”
“No. Just admiring the scenery.” Jungkook answers too quickly. He realizes how stupid he sounds and tries to correct himself. “Anyway, who would I be looking for?”
“I don’t know,” he smiles kindly, but doesn’t look up to meet his eyes. “I was just thinking maybe you wanted to tell me.”
“I.. I don’t...” Jungkook gives a final glance around the store before giving up. “I don’t know. Maybe I am.” He sighs, but the guy lifts his eyebrow encouraging him to continue. “I met someone here the other day who I was hoping to see again.”
“I normally work in the bakery, so I’m not on the front lines often. Still, I can try to help you.” His voice is comforting. He hums, “Was that someone a customer or an employee?”
Jungkook debates telling him or dropping the subject completely. He wasn’t normally the type to divulge all his secret thoughts to random strangers. He doesn’t want to look creepier than he knows he already does. But the possibility that he may know the mystery guy’s identity is far too promising. “An employee. He, uh... he checked me out on wednesday night.”
“Did he?” His lips quirk up.
“Not like that…..” Jungkook feels the heat rise to his cheeks. He angles away from him to insert his debit card into the machine to pay. “Like he rung up my groceries. And.. and he was funny.”
Another hum. He begins to bag his groceries, working quickly. “I know exactly who you’re talking about. And honestly, it was probably both.”
He fumbles his wallet, nearly dropping it at Hoseok’s admission. The confirmation that the mystery guy was flirting with him makes lightning thrum through his veins.
“He didn't tell me his name.” Jungkook knows Hoseok probably isn’t allowed to give out any personal details of his coworkers. He tacks on, hoping he gets where he’s going without verbalizing it. “Please?”
“I’m not going to tell you. You know I can’t.” He looks up at him then. His eyes sparkle with mischief. “Besides, where’s the fun in that?”
Jungkook nods, feeling mortified. He has never been this bold before. This guy was absolutely going to tell his mystery guy that he asked for him. What if the mystery guy was just being friendly with him and Jungkook took it too seriously? They would have a good laugh about the stupid love-sick stalker.
There was no way Jungkook could come back here ever again without looking like a fool. He swallows thickly, thinking he might throw up. He hoped his body would have the decency to wait until he was outside.
His breathing picks up, he tries and reaches for his bags, ready to run out of the store, but Hoseok grabs his wrist.
Something about the gentleness of his touch makes him pause and look up at him. “Hey. You’ll have better luck on Monday or Wednesday. Sometime after five.” He winks.
He looks nothing but sincere now, and Jungkook rethinks his anxiety. The simple touch allows his anxiety to lessen, his breathing to slow. He nods. Monday it is then.
“What’s up, hyung!” Jungkook walks through the door of their apartment, finally finished with his late Monday afternoon classes. The first thing he sees is a long, thin slip of paper on the table where they keep their other bills. He recognizes it instantly. He narrows his eyes as he storms into the kitchen. “Did you go to the grocery store today?”
“I needed basil and black pepper.” Jimin’s leaning over the stove, salting the water for homemade pasta like a scientist in a chemistry lab. “And since I was there, I grabbed a few other things for stuffed salmon.”
“A few?” Jungkook flings his hands out looking at the sea of empty blue bags littering their floor. “I was supposed to go to the store tonight. Now he’ll think I stood him up!”
Setting the salt shaker down, Jimin turns to him. He leans against the counter and cracks open a can of coke. “Jungkookie, I don’t know what you’re talking about. Who are you meeting at the store?” Jungkook doesn’t answer. “I didn’t even know you were seeing someone! How could you??!”
Jungkook shrugs, feeling only a little ridiculous. “I’m not…”
Jimin takes a long drink of his coke. “Does this have anything to do with your sudden interest in shopping?” He gives Jungkook a knowing look.
Jungkook hesitantly nods, “There’s an employee there…”
“Wait! It's not the sexy guy from the meat department, is it?” Jimin fumbles his soda can, the liquid sloshing over the sides of the metal.
“What?”
“Taehyung.” Jimin says, like Jungkook is supposed to know who he’s talking about. “Dreamy, boxy smile. Athletic build, gorgeous as fuck, looks like he would have no trouble picking you up and fucking you against a wall?”
“What?” Jungkook is so confused. Why is this the first time he is hearing about this? “Who? You’re… since when have you been thinking about him? Better question, why are you fantasizing about fucking him up against the meat counter?”
“Oh, I hadn’t thought about that image before. I don’t know; the metal might be too cold and I’m not really into exhibitionism.” Jimin shrugs, his lip quirking up at the corner. “Don’t judge me. I daydream a lot, especially while I grocery shop. And Taehyung is hot. Like really hot. Anyway, we’re talking about you here. Is that a yes or a no on Taehyung?”
“It’s not about Taehyung!” Jungkook flings his arms out in exasperation. “I’ve never met Taehyung! He sounds like some goddamn love interest in a fuckass novel.”
“Good. Then I call dibs.” Grinning, Jimin raises his eyebrows and motions him to continue. “So, your guy…?”
“I don’t know his name. He wasn’t wearing his name tag. Nobody from the store will tell me. They’re acting like it’s some big secret.” Jungkook concedes, covering his face with his hands.
“Maybe I’ve met him?” Jimin offers.
He thought about asking Jimin before now, but knew the odds were slim. Jimin normally isn’t that observant. Jungkook peeks out from between his fingers to look at Jimin, finally asking, “He’s a cashier up front. The tall one, with these broad as fuck shoulders.. and.. and he's hot?”
Jimin squints at him, like he’s trying to remember. “I don’t think I’ve- wait! Does he do the fingerguns after he hands you the receipt?”
Jungkook nods, feeling a little disappointed this revelation didn’t come with a name.
“What?!” Jimin laughs. “I get it. He's hot and hilarious too. Always knocking into things, or dropping them.”
“And his never ending food puns.” Jungkook sighs, shaking his head incredulously. “I’m really, embarrassingly into it.”
“Well, he is definitely single. Don’t give me that look! He does fingerguns, Jungkook.” Jimin says like that alone is supposed to deter him. It does not. In fact, it might make Jungkook like him even more. “Do you really think there’s someone else out there that finds doing fingerguns attractive? You really think he’s seeing someone?”
“Don’t be a dick.” Jungkook pouts, picking at the hem on the bottom of his shirt. “He wasn’t there on friday afternoon when I went. And you know what fridays are reserved for Jimin? They’re date nights. What if he requested it off because he’s meeting his boyfriend or something?”
“Just ask him if he’s single! It took a few trips for me to casually work it into the conversation with Taehyung. Proud to report he’s single cause he and his boyfriend broke up three months ago. But I’m planning on asking him to come over for dinner next week, so…”
Jungkook crosses his arms over his chest, mirroring Jimin’s stance. “Wait.. so did you start this top chef shit just to impress meat departmental guy named Taehyung?”
“I get it. It's kinda scary to put yourself out there.” Ignoring his question, Jimin reaches out and rubs Jungkook’s shoulder. “You have to steer the conversation to get the answers you want. You said he does food puns when he’s ringing you up? Try grabbing some items as a conversation starter. Get in on his game and figure him out and get that dick.”
Jungkook doesn’t think he’s creative like that, even if he’s already thinking about what he could buy that would prompt his mystery guy to ask for his phone number.
“Well, I can’t do it tonight anymore. It’s late and there’s no point in going if you already bought enough food to last us until next weekend.” Jungkook frowns, hangs his head, and glares at all the groceries still sitting on the counter. “Any chance we can eat everything you just bought so I can catch him on wednesday?”
Jimin turns toward the counter, reaches out and smacks the carton of eggs with an open palm. They tumble forward and down, splattering on the tile floor in a thick, slimy mess of yellow. He stares deadpan at Jungkook. “Oh, no. The eggs.”
“What a shame.” Jungkook smiles, laughter bubbling up in his throat.
Jungkook arrives at the store at 4:50 on wednesday evening, his mystery guy is not at the check-out counter. It’s okay, he thinks, trying to dampen the anxiety he feels starting to spread in his chest. He did arrive a little early.
He stops to grab a basket for his items, and walks the perimeter of the store. He passes the bakery and thinks he sees a flash of silver hair, but he blinks and suddenly it's gone. Before he heads on his way, he picks up a slice of apple pie and holds it up to inspect it. He makes an agreeable sound and places it in his cart.
As Jungkook passes through the bread aisle, he gets a clear view of the front of the store. He hears the cute cashier before he even sees him. He wonders if he spoke to Hoseok since friday, or even earlier today. He just hopes he could trust him to keep Jungkook’s secret safe.
A few crossed off items later, Jungkook stands in front of the meat counter, looking at cuts of pork. He crouches down closer to the slabs of meat showcased behind the glass. He’s a little lost as to what to look for.
Suddenly a face appears on the other side of the glass. Startled, Jungkook pulls back.
“Hey! I didn’t mean to scare you.” The tone is conversational, belonging to a guy with a boxy smile. Jungkook doesn’t even have to glance at the name tag to know whom he’s speaking to. “Is there something I can help you find?”
Jungkook stands straight up again before answering. “What exactly am I supposed to be looking for in a pork chop? Are there standards or something?”
Meat departmental guy Taehyung laughs, exposing perfect white teeth. “Let’s start off with some easy questions and see where that leads us. Do you prefer thinner cuts?”
“Um...” Jungkook stalls by looking back down at the counter. He misses the way Taehyung looks him over and shakes his head in amusement. “...No?”
“A very confident answer.” Taehyung declares and moves over marginally and spreads his arms out to the meat in front of him. “So, we’re looking at thick cuts. What do you plan on doing with them?”
Jungkook furrows his eyebrows, unable to hold Taehyung’s gaze. “...Eat them?”
“Oh. You sure you don’t want to just hit up Applebee’s or something?” Taehyung laughs. “I don’t mean to doubt your abilities, but if you’re cooking to impress someone I’d go with pasta over pork. It’s too easy to dry the meat out if you aren’t careful. Nothing worse than bone dry meat.”
“I’m picking up some things for my roommate.” Jungkook explains, rubbing the back of his neck. “He’s the executive chef in our house. If you couldn’t already tell.”
“Oh, I certainly hoped.” Taehyung is undeterred. “What’s your roommate planning on doing with them?” Jungkook opens his mouth to reply. “Don’t tell me your answer is going to be cook them?” Taehyung imitates the same questioning intonation, leaning his arms on the countertop. Jungkook closes his mouth. “Do you know if he’s going to grill, pan-sear, or broil?”
Jungkook shrugs, “We don’t have a grill. Maybe pan-sear? That sounds familiar. I’d text him but he’s still in class for another hour.”
“How about I just select something for you both. Two cuts? Or are you and your roommate hosting company?”
“It’s just us, so two should be fine.” Jungkook finally chances a look at Taehyung, and is surprised that he really does look like the love interest in a novel. Jungkook wonders how soon he’ll be seeing Taehyung in their own apartment. He spaces out while Taehyung does his thing and finally presents him with two little packages.
“Let’s hope you and your roommate don’t burn your place down.” It’s meant to be playful, and Taehyung presents the packages with his smile.
Jungkook smiles back gratefully. “Thanks. See you around.”
There’s a ‘thanks for not busting my chops’ line that zings through Jungkook’s brain in mystery guy’s loud voice followed by his unmistakable laughter. Jungkook feels the heat creep up his neck, and even though no one is watching him, he brings his hand up to cover his growing smile.
With two pork chops down, Jungkook crosses the last items off his list. He takes a deep, steadying breath and heads to the front. For the first time, he notices the store is relatively empty. That should buy him some time with the mystery guy.
“I’ll check you out.”
He looks up upon hearing the familiar voice and there stands his mystery guy, leaning back against the conveyor belt. His shirt is properly buttoned this time.
Jungkook takes in the sight of him, and his voice comes out a little breathlessly. “Hey.”
As Jungkook approaches, the cashier takes his position behind the counter. Jungkook begins to unload his cart, and immediately the groceries glide towards the scanner.
“We’re having a continuation of our real-life meat-cute!” the mystery guy laughs as he holds up the pork chops. “You look radish-ing, as always Jungkook.”
“Whatever.” Jungkook hides a smile, pleased that the cute cashier remembers his name after an entire week. At the very least he’s not acting any differently since Jungkook’s conversation with Hoseok. Maybe he didn’t throw him under the bus after all.
Mystery guy slides the pack of chewing gum slowly across the scanner, taking the moment to shamelessly look Jungkook up and down. “Oh, sorry. Was that pun too Extra? I can stop if you want me to."
Jungkook thinks to check the clerk’s name tag. He looks down to see Hoseok written in the same red ink, but the heart has been messily erased and replaced with a winky face in the top right corner. The image stares back at him tauntingly.
“Are you fucking kidding me?” Jungkook lifts up an eyebrow inquisitively, talking mostly to himself in an astonished whisper.
Unaware of Jungkook’s current crisis, the cashier continues. “I mean, kinda. That’s what puns are. But I can stop. I don’t carrot all. Just say the word, but it looks like you’re still enjoying this berry much.” He slides the blueberries through the scanner.
“Not the puns. The name tag.” He gestures to it helplessly and sighs at the guy, more fond than he’s willing to admit. “I’ve met Hoseok before.”
“So, I’ve heard.” The clerk giggles as he picks up a toothbrush. “Well, it’s pretty obvious I’m not Hoseok. I was in a brush this afternoon and Hoseok in the bakery gave me his. After all, he wouldn’t leave me pie-and-dry in my moment of need. He’s been my best friend since middle school.”
“Oh.” Jungkook feels his throat get tight. He wonders how much of their conversation he divulged when he clearly reported back to him. “He didn’t mention that to me.”
“He also let me know I may have a special visitor tonight,” he winks at him. “He was right.”
So, everything. Hoseok told him everything.
“How do you know he was talking about me?” Belatedly Jungkook thinks he may not have been referring to him. Maybe it’s a trap to get Jungkook to admit he came here again with the specific intention of talking to the cashier again.
“Who else would he be talking about, Jungkook?” He smiles. “It’s okay. I wanted to see you again, too. You’re cute, cute, cute.” He rings up the cuties brand oranges.
Jungkook fully snorts this time, feeling more than a little flattered at the compliment. The cute cashier’s admission works to soothe his nerves. It wasn’t something Jungkook was just reading too much into. They’re actually flirting.
It gives him the push to ask, “Okay, not-Hoseok. Can I ask what’s with all the jokes?”
"So you admit that I'm actually hilarious?”
“Of course, I do,” Jungkook sets the last of his groceries from his shopping cart on the end of the conveyor belt.
“And you butter believe it.”
“I mean it.” Jungkook giggles. He doesn’t miss the way the guy’s lips turn up at the corners, or the way he bites his lip to keep that smile in check. “So, you work here as a part-timer?”
“Yep. Bills don’t pay themselves when you’re a full-time student. Gotta bring home the cheese.”
Jungkook leans against the counter, pressing into the cashier’s space just a little. “Let me guess- film major?”
“How’d you know?” The clerk eyes the popcorn and lifts an eyebrow. “It must mean we’re super corn-patible!”
“Are we?” Jungkook muses. He looks the clerk over slowly, just as he did to him earlier. Jungkook’s kind of smitten with him. Jungkook holds up the ginger before handing it over. “Is your entire routine rooted in food puns, too?”
The clerk looks delighted. “Oh.. you get off a good one! No, I take that a little more seriously. This is for fun.”
Jungkook begins the process of paying for his items. “So, how often do you play this game with customers?”
“You’re my only audience. I only do it with you cause you’re a cutie.” He holds up the bag of Orange Cuties again before placing them in the plastic bag along with the paper receipt. Jungkook’s heart absolutely does not speed up at the compliment. “Are you sure you can carry all of this?”
“I’ll be fine.” He wants to stay and talk a little longer, but there’s a line behind him now. At least Jungkook feels better after their interaction today. There’s definitely something here. “See you again next week, not-Hoseok.”
“Hope so.” The cute cashier shoots him his trademarked fingerguns before returning to his duties.
Jungkook succeeds in holding in his snort. He will never admit to Jimin that he finds it endearing. He’ll take that secret to the grave, thank you very much.
He can’t remember the last time he’s had this much fun with a gorgeous guy before.
Mystery guy with his easy jokes and charming, dorky demeanor is exactly Jungkook’s speed. The perfect guy for Jungkook. Now he just needs to find a way to get the guy to ask him out.
Jungkook walks into his apartment later that week to see Jimin cooking for an audience.
Even though both men have their backs turned to him and he’s only met the guy once, he already recognizes-
“Oh.. Taehyung right?”
“I didn’t realize I was famous in this household.” Taehyung turns to extend his hand out, but when he sees that it's Jungkook, he laughs heartily and retracts his hand. “Well now this is starting to make sense. What’s up?”
Jimin looks incredibly lost during this exchange, but pleased nonetheless. He continues to season the steaks, choosing to let the conversation unfold.
“Not much.” Jungkook drops his backpack on the couch and sits down at the counter next to Taehyung. “I didn’t know you made house calls. You must be wholly dedicated to your profession. Is there a sign-up sheet for that incredibly specific service somewhere?”
“Oh yeah, but I’m booked up for the foreseeable future.” Taehyung reaches out and strokes the back of Jimin’s hand with his fingertips. “Besides, multiple sources tell me you’ve got it bad for our hyung.”
“Who?”
“Fingerguns.” Jimin helpfully supplies. Jungkook’s eyes widen as he glares at his friend.
“Yes, him.” Taehyung laughs. Jimin turns to the stove to check on the boiling potatoes.
“So how long have you known...” Jungkook trails off, hoping Taehyung will complete the sentence.
“Oh, no way I’m falling for that.” Taehyung takes a sip of his red wine. “I’m under strict orders from Hoseok hyung to keep his name under wraps. Just know we’re all rooting for you though.”
Jungkook runs his hand through his hair. This is officially the worst kept secret in all of existence. Jimin, Hoseok, Taehyung... was Yoongi, Namjoon's boyfriend in on it, too? “God, does everyone know about this? Is the entire store laughing at me?”
“Not laughing. More like silently cheering. And not everyone. Just,” Taehyung starts naming them and ticking them off on his fingers. “Hobi hyung, Joon hyung, Yoongi hyung...”
“Even Namjoon knows?” Jungkook shrieks. “We haven’t even met yet!”
“He’s Yoongi’s boyfriend, so it’s expected that he knows. When you and hyung get your shit together, you and Jimin can join us and we’ll all go out for drinks sometime. It will be great.” Taehyung claps him on the back.
Jungkook huffs, not as embarrassed as he feels he should be. “You seem to have your shit together Taehyung. What would you do to get someone to ask you out?”
In front of him, Jimin makes a wounded noise. Jungkook rolls his eyes. Jimin doesn’t have his shit together. Jimin spent most of his morning yelling at not-quite boiled eggs and bargaining with the Food Gods to bless him with the perfect sauce he would ever make.
“I’m pretty direct. I wouldn’t be in that situation. I asked for Jiminie’s name the first time I met him. Then I asked for his number when I found out you weren’t my competition. Really should’ve led with that.” Taehyung shoots Jimin a wink. “But I do have Hoseok hyung’s advice, which he so generously offered in ‘the off-chance that you should ask’.”
Taehyung waits for Jungkook’s approving nod. “He said since you both insist on playing games, you should buy two things and two things only. Lube and condoms. Then as he rings you up, ask him if he wants to hang out after his shift.”
“Direct, yet playful.” Jimin nods. “I approve.”
“You’re more of a wine ‘em and dine ‘em. Not that I’m complaining.” Taehyung tells Jimin. He shakes his head, and returns his attention to Jungkook. “No, I think if you actually did that, hyung’s brain would short circuit.”
Jungkook believes it. His own brain nearly short circuits just from listening to that plan. That’s more direct than the combination of everything else Jungkook has ever done in his life.
“Hyung's really a sweet guy, Jungkook. You two would be good for each other. He’s into it just as much as you are.” Taehyung takes another sip of wine. “I think he’s holding back on asking you out because he wants a clear sign that you’re interested and he needs to convince himself that he’s not going to mess it up.”
Being direct is admittedly not Jungkook’s strong suit. He has never been great at being brave, especially when it comes to relationships. Maybe he could be, just this once, for his mystery guy though.
“Orange you glad to see me, Jungkook?”
“We both know that pun is overused. It’s expired.” Jungkook pauses his movements and meets the cashier’s gaze. “I refuse to accept it. In fact, I’m returning it. You’re better than that.”
“You can’t return it!” the cashier scoffs, barely holding his expression before he dissolves into a fit of giggles. “I’ll admit that pun was low-hanging fruit. They can’t all be grape.”
“Since when did you start telling dad jokes?” Jungkook leans against the counter, just pressing into the clerk’s space. “I expect top-quality puns from this store. I might to start shopping somewhere else.”
The cashier gently moves the two liter of coke off to the side. “I can step up my material.” He pushes the egg stack through the scanner. “Get egg-cited. I’m bringing my A game.”
“Are you always like this?” Jungkook laughs, sweetly looking up at him through his lashes. “Is this how you talk to your friends in public?”
The clerk grabs two items at once, making perfect eye contact as he slides the items through the scanner. “Yeah.”
“Okay. The two for one is a little impressive.” Jungkook admits. “This time I picked up some things I thought would trip you up.”
“Yeah?” The guy raises his eyebrows at Jungkook, who refuses to blush despite knowing he’d been caught. “Well, did I foil your plans? I’m im-pasta-ble to beet.”
“I don’t believe that.” Jungkook leans on the counter even further to squint at the name tag. In plain yellow cursive: Taehyung. “Pretending to be Taehyung from the meat department today?”
Cute Cashier raises his eyebrows, clearly impressed. Seems like Taehyung is a little better at secrets than Hoseok has been. “So, you caught me again. Yeah, have you met Taehyung? He’s helped me out of some of my worst situations. That’s weird. He’s never mentioned meeting you before.”
“So, you talk to your friends about me?” He notices a red flush appear on the cashier’s cheeks. Jungkook bites his lip. “If you can talk to Hoseok about me, then I can talk to Taehyung about you.”
“Hm,” the cashier scans the bag of brown sugar. “Did you just admit you do the same?”
Jungkook ignores the question. “Only Taehyung will keep my secrets, cause he’s dating my roommate, Jimin.”
“Jimin?” The cashier looks at the line behind Jungkook. He looks like he’s going to say something, then shakes his head. After a second, he rethinks and leans in closer anyway and whispers, "The one Taehyung keeps blabbering about, right?”
“Probably.”
He throws his head back and laughs long and loud before continuing to bag up the groceries. “That’s fair enough. I’m sure he’s great ‘cause Taehyung has a definite type in his guys. What’s your type?” It's out there before the guy realizes, like the words just slip out of his mouth. He tries to backpeddle. “I mean-”
To his own surprise, Jungkook answers immediately. “Tall, funny, and handsome. Mysterious- like I’d have to work really hard just to get his name. What’s your type?”
"Cute being my type. More specifically I’m a sucker for a guy who’s easily impressed by food puns. And who’s ass looks great in black skinny jeans.”
The cashier hands Jungkook his receipt. Jungkook reaches for it and their fingers brush together. The touch feels electric.
“Back to work, hyung!” Yoongi calls out. He continues flipping through a travel magazine without so much as looking up at them. There’s a smirk reminiscent of Hoseok’s plastered on his face.
The cashier hangs his head, his cap toppling onto the scanner. His responding voice sounds pained. “You’ve got it, Yoongi.”
“Until next time,” Jungkook smiles. He reaches up and tucks a stray curl behind the guy’s ear. “We’ll pick up where we left off, yeah?”
As he walks away, Jungkook makes a conscious effort to swing his hips just a fraction more. Before going out the sliding entry doors, he turns back and meets his eyes, Seokjin groans.
“You’re killing me, Jungkook.”
“We meet again.” the cashier drops his voice and whispers conspiratorially, even though they’re alone. “I’ve been thinking about you.”
“And here I thought you were only thinking about my skinny jeans.”
“Oh. We can certainly talk ‘bout that. You’re absolutely gorgeous in those jeans, babe.” He twists the pumpkin pie filling around to find the barcode. “I’d love to just peel them off of you.”
“See, I’ve been thinking, too.” Jungkook slides the chicken fingers a little closer to the scanner, “I’ve been imagining your long fingers and what they could do in another, more intimate setting.”
The mystery guy looks like he can’t decide if he’s more delighted or turned on. Maybe Taehyung is right and his brain short circuited. If so, he reboots quickly. “I’m imagining all the possibilities right now. I’m absolutely willing to go 50 Shades of Grey on you, especially if that’s what you’re into,” he slides muffins through the scanner.
“As it turns out, I’m a sucker for guys with nice shoulders.” Jungkook reaches over to run a little brush of his hand over Seokjin's shoulder. “It's so hard to keep my hands off of you, but we’re in public so for now, I’m going to have to keep it clean."
“What if I don’t wanna keep it clean, Jungkook?”
Jungkook’s gaze flits down to the name tag, a hastily scrawled Seokjin written there today. “Then you better do something about it this time, Seokjin.” This time, the guy doesn’t correct him, and instead a smile spreads across his face. Jungkook’s mission is temporarily forgotten in his surprise. “Really? Seokjin?”
The guy closes his eyes like he’s super affected by the way Jungkook says his name. Jungkook can relate. He nods again, “Kim Seokjin. It’s nice to finally meet you, sugar.”
And Jungkook absolutely did not buy that last item just to hear the way the word would sound coming from Seokjin’s mouth. There’s no proof of that.
“I get off in an hour. Would you want to grab a drink with me?” Seokjin shyly looks back down and resumes scanning Jungkook’s items, like he didn’t expect the invitation to tumble from his mouth.
“I’d love to.” Jungkook gestures to the blue plastic bags. “But I need to take my groceries home. I can meet you somewhere after?”
“I don’t want to pressure you.” Seokjin still can’t meet his gaze, like he can’t believe Jungkook would’ve said yes. “You can pass on the opportunity. I mean, if you have other plans.”
There’s one item left for Seokjin to scan and Jungkook hands it to him, letting his fingers wrap around the other guy’s hand. Jungkook doesn’t move away or speak until he looks up at him.
“It’s a date, Seokjin.”