Work Text:
How can you miss someone you've never met?
'Cause I need you now, but I don't know you yet
But can you find me soon because I'm in my head?
Yeah, I need you now, but I don't know you yet
How can you miss someone you’ve never met ? It might seem like a hard question but the answer is easy : this someone is your soulmate.
Minho loves the concept of soulmates. He loves that there is someone out there who will love him unconditionally, and probably already does, even if they haven’t met yet. He loves how there is a person who is made for him, who completes him. There’s no one who can fit him like his soulmate does.
But this is also inconvenient. Until you meet your person, you feel like there is a hole deep in your heart. You crave this person, you need them. Without them, the world makes a little less sense. Constantly, every day and every night, you miss them. Your heart knows that something is not right, that you miss something.
Sometimes, the pain from missing your soulmate is so strong that it makes you cry because you feel so lonely. No matter how many people there are around you, no matter how much your friends and family love you, nothing can fill the hole in your soul.
Minho craves for the day he will see colors for the first time because it will mean he finally met his soulmate. Indeed, until you’ve met your soulmate, you see the world in black and white. It makes Minho sad sometimes as colors seem truly wonderful from what the people who met their soulmates already described to him.
He still remembers how Hyunjin’s eyes were shining when he met Felix, not only because he finally met his soulmate but also because of how pretty the world was in colors. Minho can't wait for the day this will happen to him as well.
He is starting to lose hope though, as he is already 23 years old and most people have already found their soulmate by this age. His university is filled with couples, because it is one of the places where you’re the most likely to find your soulmate, but Minho is still painfully single. Some people do date before meeting their soulmates and Minho isn’t against it (it’s not his business anyway) but he himself can’t do it.
He tried once, to go on a date but he couldn’t force himself to open the restaurant’s door. Somehow, he felt like he was betraying his soulmate. Instead, he called the person he was planning to meet with and explained everything to them. They were a bit mad at first of course, having wasted their time, but they were still understanding. Not everyone could date someone that was not their soulmate.
After that, Minho gave up on dates and turned everyone down that approached him as he knew he wouldn’t be able to feel anything for someone who was not his soulmate. It made his Saturday nights quite lonely but Minho was okay with that. He knows it will be worth it once he meets his soulmate. He just hopes the time will come soon.
This Saturday night though, Minho won’t spend it in his bed watching a random series like he usually does. He has an amazing work opportunity. Minho is currently in university, doing a photography degree, but he is also working next to it in a big company that hires photographers for magazines, labels, other companies etc. These firms call Minho’s company when they want a photographer for an occasional event.
This Saturday, Minho will take pictures at a concert of a famous artist called Han for a Korean pop culture magazine. He is really excited about it because he loves taking concert photographs. He loves playing with the lights and the movement of the singer.
When an artist is singing, they are expressive, you can see their emotions on their face and Minho loves pictures where you can see one’s feelings on it because it makes you feel something as well.
He was not supposed to go to this concert but the other photographer bailed last minute so the company called him urgently to see if he was free and up for it and Minho said yes.
Now Minho is getting ready in his bedroom to go to the concert’s venue. He still has an hour before he has to leave his apartment so he takes the time to pick a pretty outfit that he will feel comfortable in. He pulls on a white shirt with black cargo pants and combat boots before styling his hair.
One of the great things about concert photography is that you are still able to enjoy the show as focusing on taking good pictures doesn’t prevent you from listening to the songs and seeing the concert, even if it is through your lens. He listened to a couple songs of the artist who is gonna sing tonight and he loved those. Han has a beautiful voice and he is quite joyful to be able to see one of his shows, for free on top of that.
Minho leaves his apartment once he’s ready and goes to the subway station, the traffic in Seoul being a nightmare at this time of the evening. As he sits on one of the empty subway's car’s seats, Minho lets his mind wander, once again to his soulmate.
What are you like ? Are your eyes brown, blue or green ? Do you like your coffee with sugar and cream or do you take it straight just like me ? Do you like to spend time alone by yourself or are you more of the extrovert kind and likes to go out ? What do you like ? How do you define yourself ? What are your dreams and your fears ?
Do you love me as much as I love you ?
God Minho loves him so much. He thinks of his soulmate all the time. Just the fact one day he’ll get to meet them, and be with them makes him happy. He can’t wait for the day when his soul and heart will be complete, when everything will finally feel right. He’s tired of missing someone he doesn’t know yet.
And he wants to get to know his soulmate so bad. Learn what they like to do in their free time, what they enjoy eating, what their favorite songs are. Meet their friends and family. Listen to their stories and memories. Hear the sound of their voice, see the color of their eyes, know what their skin feels like under his hands. He wants to know all of that. He wants to know their habits, their wishes for the future, the way they talk to other people. He wants to know what they feel towards him, if they want to spend their life with Minho, if they love him as much as he does and if they missed him just like he does right now.
Minho is just not sure if he’ll get to know all of that soon. Sometimes it feels like he'll never meet his soulmate and will spend his life missing someone he doesn't know but who still makes his heart beat faster. How dumb is that ? He’s in love with someone he doesn’t know anything about, apart from the fact that they exist.
Maybe it’s just how soulmates work. Loving someone even if you’ve never met them because you belong together, because your heart isn’t complete until you’re with them, because there’s this inexplicable bond between you that ties you together.
Minho is so lost in his thoughts that he almost misses his stop, getting off just in time as the subway’s doors close behind him. The venue is a couple of minutes away so he hurries up as he wants to have some time to prepare his camera before the show starts.
Once he gets inside, Minho is led by a security member at the front of the venue, in a secluded area made for photographers. He greets the other workers there and starts setting up his camera, adjusting the settings once the lights are turned off.
Han is gonna come up on stage in a couple minutes and Minho feels a wave of excitement running through his veins, which he finds a bit weird as Minho isn’t a fan of the singer and isn’t that excited for the show. Sure, he did listen to a couple songs and enjoyed those but he doesn’t know enough of the artist to feel like this.
Something feels off somehow, like something is gonna happen but Minho has no idea what and it makes him frustrated. It’s like his body is alerting him, but what would it alert him of ?
The music starts and everyone around him begins screaming, obviously excited to get to see Han, maybe for the first time in their life. The screams are so loud in his ears, making him hiss in pain and the lights are blinding him but Minho doesn’t focus on it, doesn’t really care about it because suddenly, as Han appears on stage, he can see colors.
He can see colors.
What ?
Minho is lost. He doesn’t know how to react or what to think about this. For a second, he thinks he sees the singer looking bewildered, his body tensing but soon after that he puts on a professional mask and keeps on singing, to the point Minho thinks maybe he imagined it. But there is no other way : Han is his soulmate. Minho started seeing colors as soon as his eyes landed on the singer and if what he believes he saw is true, then Han probably started seeing colors as well.
Minho doesn’t know what to do. What can he do ? What the hell should he do ? His soulmate is a singer who is currently performing in front of thousands of people and it’s not like he can just jump on stage and introduce himself. The security would stop him anyway.
When he thought of meeting his soulmate, Minho always imagined it would be in a normal setting, in university or in the streets or something. Somewhere where they would be able to get to know each other and talk about the future and what will happen.
Instead, he got this.
He doesn’t even think Han knows Minho is his soulmate. From Han’s point of view, it could be anyone in the venue. From where he is standing, he can only see thousands of faceless bodies and the only thing he knows is that somewhere, there is his soulmate. At least Minho knows who his soulmate is.
It doesn’t make things better though. He has dreamed of meeting his soulmate for years but now that he has met them, he can’t actually talk to them. Minho has no idea what to do and it makes him anxious. He searches in every bit of his mind for a solution but he doesn’t see any. He can’t get the singer’s attention because the room is plunged into darkness. And it’s not like he can go see a security guard, they wouldn’t believe him. They probably get fans pretending to be Han’s soulmate at every show.
Minho is overwhelmed by everything happening and he starts to panic, his eyes watering and his heart beating way too fast. He feels like he is suffocating, drowning in the confusing emotions he’s feeling and he doesn’t know what to do. He is supposed to take pictures for the magazine but right now he can't breath and he is about to faint, barely able to stand straight.
Minho feels someone tapping on his shoulder, talking to him, but he doesn’t really hear them, first because everyone is singing loudly around him and secondly because there’s a deep buzz in his ears. Seeing that Minho isn’t responding, the person in front of him, a short brunet old woman, guides him to sit down to the side of their secluded area, making sure no one will accidentally step on him.
She then gives him an unopened bottle of water and calls a security guard over. Minho doesn’t hear their conversation but suddenly he’s being led out of the concert room and into the big venue’s corridors, before entering a small room, probably the emergency area.
There, what seems to be a nurse starts gently asking him questions but Minho can only shake his head, too overwhelmed to answer anything. It takes him quite a while to calm down, his mind still a bit fuzzy from everything that happened, and it’s only after he notices his cheeks are wet.
God, Minho is embarrassed. He can’t believe he just cried in front of so many people without even noticing it. The nurse is kind though and doesn’t make any comment on it, only wondering if he needs anything or if he wants to talk about it. Minho isn’t hurt anywhere really, just a bit submerged by his emotions but his mind is beginning to get clearer.
Minho stays sat on the bed for a couple more minutes to get his thoughts back on track. He comes to the conclusion that he can’t do anything much apart from waiting outside the venue after the show in hopes he can see Han getting out. By experience, Minho knows that usually after concerts there are always a few fans waiting at one of the venue’s back doors, in hope to see the artist that performed. And sometimes, if they are lucky enough, they get to see them. Minho prays that luck will be on his side tonight because he doesn’t see any other solution.
Minho decides it’s time for him to get back to the venue and wave the nurse goodbye, thanking him for taking care of him when he wasn’t feeling well. He then gets back to where he was standing before, the woman who helped him in the first place making sure he’s feeling better, before he starts taking pictures of Han, as he still has a job to do.
Photographing Han feels weird, Minho is mesmerized every time he takes a picture. Han is beautiful, his skin so soft on the photographs and his eyes shining under the spotlights. He looks happy to be here, having a blast singing and dancing to his songs and seeing the audience having fun with him. He is so handsome and Minho can’t believe he is lucky enough to have a soulmate who looks like that. He can’t take his eyes away. God, he is so in love with him.
The concert slowly starts coming to the end and with that the tension and stress rises in Minho’s chest. He makes sure to breathe deeply though, not wanting to put his body through what happened earlier again and risks the chance to talk to his soulmate because he has to stay in the emergency room.
Minho takes the last few pictures, being satisfied with how they turn out, and as soon as Han leaves the stage, Minho makes his way out of the venue. There are many people at the show though so when he’s finally at the venue’s biggest back door, where the singer is the most likely to get out from, there are already a few fans waiting.
Minho reassures himself though : even if he’s not at the front, he just has to scream and Han will hear him and stop. It will be okay. This is what Minho tells himself as the minutes tick off, not wanting to lose hope. He has to see Han.
There is no way he’s gonna miss the opportunity to meet his soulmate, after years of craving it and needing them so badly, just because his soulmate is a goddamn singer. Unfortunately, after waiting for a while in the cold dark night, a security member comes over and tells them Han has already left.
No.
No. It can’t be happening right now. Minho can’t have lost his soulmate, it’s not possible. But it is and Minho is crushed, almost falling to the ground and curling into a ball before remembering that he is not alone and the only thing that could be worse than this is to get humiliated on top of that. So Minho walks off, not really knowing where he’s going but just wanting to leave the place and forget about how he lost his soulmate on the same day he met them.
Because let’s be honest, the chances he’s gonna see him again are slim. He could send him messages on social media but he doesn’t think Han is the one handling his accounts and that they will be read. He could go to other events but Minho doesn’t have enough money to go to many more of these, being a university student who uses all his money for food, rent and bills. And even if he could go, he probably would miss the opportunity to see Han just like he did today.
Maybe when he has more money and he can get to many of Han’s shows and meetings he will get the chance to see him but that won’t happen for a while, as he won’t finish his degree before 2 years and he probably won’t be hired as a well paid employee immediately after that.
So really, Minho is condemned to spend a few years at least, alone, drowning in the fact he met his soulmate but lost them immediately after that. And it’s not like Han can look for him either because he doesn’t know who his soulmate exactly is.
Minho had hoped that maybe Han would have waited for him at the back door, would have thought about how his soulmate would surely look for him, but he probably had been forced by his staff to leave, maybe had other commitments after this because he didn’t wait for Minho to find him.
And here Minho is, all alone in the streets of Seoul, wandering in busy shopping streets, moping about his sad love life. The only thing that could make him feel better right now is chicken ramen so he stops at the first shop that sells some and sits at one of the deserted tables, ordering straight away.
Minho is so lost in his thoughts that he doesn’t notice it immediately. The voices are more of a background noise, not quite grabbing his attention. He hears them talking about soulmates, hears someone complaining about having to leave while wanting to stay, but he is so focused on his own pain that it doesn’t click in his mind. It’s only when they sit at the table next to him and one says “but i met my soulmate” that he looks at them.
And then he yells. Which is very mature indeed but at least it does the job at grabbing his soulmate’s attention. Of course, he didn’t do it on purpose, he was just too shocked to see Han in a random ramen shop to control his voice and well, act like an adult. Han looks at him weirdly, probably thinking he’s some crazy man, and it’s the worst impression someone could make on their soulmate but Minho he’s too happy to finally meet his soulmate one on one that he doesn’t really care.
“I, I’m sorry” is the only thing he can say because he is feeling way too overwhelmed (once again) to think straight. He thought he lost his soulmate, at least for a couple years, but here he is, right in front of him for a late night dinner. Minho knows better than to lose the opportunity to talk to his soulmate again though so he does the first thing that comes to his mind, which is getting up and taking Han’s hand in his and saying “I’m your soulmate.”
Which, okay, let’s be honest, is a freaking scary and disturbing thing to do. If a stranger came to him out of nowhere and declared they were his soulmate, he probably would try to run away. But after the roller coaster of emotions tonight has been, Minho can’t think of anything better.
But when Minho takes Han’s hand in his, a spark runs through his body and Han probably feels it too because suddenly a look of understanding takes upon his face. It’s like he realizes the person in front of him is his home, his soulmate, the one he loves unconditionally. Just one touch from Minho is enough for his soul to recognize his other half.
Han runs into his arm, hiding his face into his neck and sobbing uncontrollably, while Minho is crying too, holding him tightly. He can feel Han’s heartbeat against his, both beating in sync. Minho feels complete now, the hole in his heart is finally filled. He found his missing piece.
They stay like this for a while, Han safely tucked in Minho’s arms, his breath tickling his neck. But for nothing in this world Minho would want to move, feeling peaceful and happy with his soulmate against him.
They do have to move at some point though, as they are still in a restaurant and he can see the waiter waiting next to them. Minho takes Han’s hands and leads him to the empty chair on his table, making sure he’s sat comfortably before sitting opposite to him. For a while, they just look at each other, not sure what to say, but already feeling so safe and at home together.
Since he is young, Minho believes that home doesn’t have to be a place. Home is the feeling you get when you love someone, and you can feel the love from that person as well. It’s when you feel safe and comfortable with them, because you know they will never judge you and will always listen to you. It’s the most beautiful feeling in the world according to Minho.
And Han is his home.
They do start talking at some point, introducing themselves to their soulmate. Minho learns that Han’s real name is Jisung, which is a name as pretty as him he thinks. He tells him so and Jisung blushes, his cheeks a dark crimson red that he tries to hide in his hands.
“You’re adorable” Minho says, to which Jisung pouts and denies, which only makes him cuter. And it makes Minho’s heart burst. He loved his soulmate so much before but he loves him even more now. At every minute that goes by, Minho falls deeper in love with his soulmate.
And Minho can’t wait to fall deeper in love with him every day that they will spend together.