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Motes of light, slipping through her fingers. She’s fading fast, her sight is going dim. They stand around her. Sena has her head in her hands, her shoulders shaking in gentle sobs as Eunie desperately tries to soothe her. Lanz is grabbing Taion by the shirt, can’t he do something? Taion can’t do anything but shake his head, hand clutched to his mouth. There’s nothing he can do to stop this, nothing anyone could do.
And then there’s him. His eyes are wide and pleading, the glow of the light catching in the blue. Her name passes his lips as he falls to his knees, barely more than a breath. He reaches for her hand, trying to grasp it as it slowly fades into light…
Mio’s eyes fluttered open. She sat forward with a start, the tips of her ears brushing the top of the tent. The last embers of the campfire crackled outside. The others in the tent were at peace. Eunie lay sprawled, arm hanging off her cot, snoring loud enough to wake the dead. Next to her, Sena was curled into a tight ball, the blue glow in her hair brightening and dimming with each breath. Manana rolled around in her sleep, quietly murmuring to herself. By the sound of it, the boys were all asleep in their tent as well; she could hear no one else moving about the camp.
Mio sighed, and brought a hand to her neck. She knew that the mark was the same as it had been before, a faded gray with a single point of red. How long did she have now? Four weeks? Five? Not long enough, obviously. Even if they achieved a world without war, without Consuls, she wouldn’t live to see it. Everything they’d worked so hard for, and she wouldn’t be able to reap any of the reward. It was depressing to think about.
She cast off the thin blanket and crawled out of the tent. There was no point in simply sitting there; she may as well do something. She pulled on her boots and grabbed her puffy white jacket. She walked over to put out the campfire, the coals hissing as she poured water over them. She collapsed into the chair near the edge of the pit, and started absently paging through her journal.
It would be all that was left of her soon, this journal. She’d been keeping it since her sixth term. It detailed every mundane moment, every friend she’d made and lost, every face she’d sent off. For the last three months, it had been far less mundane. It had been filled with details of her newfound travels, her friends new and old. She thumbed to a page from about a month ago. We’re nearing the Great Sword now. Finally, we’re making progress. Taion’s cooking dinner tonight. Hopefully it’s not too horrible. She quietly laughed. The meal that night had been probably Taion’s worst. Lanz had quite nearly gagged on the first bite. They’d teased Taion for days about that one. He insisted it came out exactly as he intended, with maximum nutritional content. “But of course!” Eunie replied. “It was so bad, it had to be intentional on your part!”
She closed the journal. She’d have to make sure to entrust it to someone when the time came. Sena seemed like the most obvious choice. She was her oldest friend in the group. It was only right that she had it. But the more she thought about it, the more she remembered Noah. She remembered the first time they had interlinked, the flood of his thoughts washing over her, understanding him more in an instant than she understood some people she’d known for years. She remembered him back to back with her, fighting a Ferronis with him with nothing but their Blades and a dream. She remembered his smile in the glow of the rising sun as he offered her his flute in exchange for hers. Somehow, despite having known him for so short a time, she trusted him more than anything. He was reliable in battle, that was part of it. But that wasn’t really what it was. There was something in the sound of his voice, the warmth of his gaze, that made her feel so completely safe. It was a gentle, earnest strength, drawing her in like a moth to flame.
Back in the City, they had tried to explain love to them. How sometimes, people made each other more than they had ever been. How they supported each other, stayed side by side through all challenges, taught each other things about themselves they’d never known. They were friends, yes, but they were also something else. Mio had had trouble even trying to comprehend it. Attachments like that were dangerous to someone born a soldier, as they all had been. Most friendships you made didn’t last long before one of you was dead on the frontline. To attempt something more than that was nothing but foolish. But now, as she thought of Noah’s smile, she wanted that more than anything. She wanted to be by his side, to pick him up when he fell, to learn from him, to live a life with him. But of course, that wasn’t her fate.
With a sigh, she stood from her chair and walked to the edge of the cliff where they had made camp. She looked out over the sea, the twinkling stars reflected in its gently rippling surface, the loud crash at the bottom of the cliffs echoing up. She sat, letting her legs dangle over the edge. She had never been to the sea until a few days ago. Why would she have? It’s not like Keves and Agnus did battle there. She took out her flute - Noah’s flute - from her pocket. The dark, lacquered wood caught the light of the stars, the black tassel near the end blowing in the sea breeze. It was beautiful, truly. One of the few forms of art that came from their war-torn world. She wondered if, in a more peaceful world, people could make more things like this.
She slowly lifted the flute to her lips and began to play a sweet, mournful tune. A tune for the dead, as all offseer songs were. Mio had wondered what kind of music would be played when there was no one left to send off. Perhaps, one day, someone would write a song of joy for flutes to play. But for now, what she knew would have to do. The notes echoed off the rocks, the song reverberating through the air, clear as a bell. She played for a long time, a requiem for herself. She put every last bit of herself into the song, every soul she’d met, every memory she had, everything. She didn’t even notice as the tears began to stream down her face, nor did she notice the footsteps approaching her.
“Mio? Are you okay?” She turned around, and there stood Noah, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. He had let his hair down, and it framed his face in a shadowy curtain. His eyes widened after seeing her tear streaked face. “Oh - I’m sorry.. I’ll-”
“No, no. Stay.” She tried to wipe her face, to make her sorrow less obvious. “I just... I needed to think.”
“I see.” Noah sat down next to her. He bit his lip and twiddled his thumbs together, clearly unable to broach the question of what had brought her out here.
Mio sighed, noticing his discomfort. “Nothing serious, I promise you. I just needed to clear my head from a dream that I had. About…” She swallowed nervously, her mouth bone dry. “About my Homecoming.”
Noah nodded gravely. “It’s not long now, is it?”
“No, not long at all.” Her hand again made its way to the mark on her neck. She looked down at Noah’s own mark, on the back of his hand. His was mostly gray as well, but with a diamond of red around his own central circle. He had another year, at least. Not all the time in the world, but enough. “Tell me. What are you going to do when we stop the war? When I’m gone.”
“Well, I… I never really thought about it.” He laughed a little, leaning back on his hands. “It’s a little hard to conceptualize a world without war, isn’t it? I’m not even sure what the idea means,”
“I suppose you’re right.” According to Monica, Keves and Agnus had been fighting as far back as any records went. A world without war would be truly something nobody had dared to dream of.
The pair went silent. Mio watched Noah intently. There was a thoughtful look in his eyes as they gazed a million miles away, his brow furrowed and mouth in a slight frown. After a minute or two, his eyes lit up, and he turned to Mio. “I’ll start,” he declared, “by writing a new song. A song to celebrate the newfound peace.”
“A new song?” Mio slid a little closer to her friend, looking at him curiously. “What will it sound like?”
Noah’s cheeks flushed pink. “I hadn’t really thought about it. All my old songs weren't particularly cheerful. I might need some time to learn how to write a happier tune.”
Mio smiled. “Well, I have faith that it will be lovely.”
“Thank you.” Noah gazed out at the stars with a wistful expression. “I just wish you’d be able to hear it.”
“I… I wish I could, too.” She rested her head on his shoulder, feeling him jolt as she leaned her weight against him. “I’m not ready to leave you yet, Noah.”
“Me? Not everyone else?”
“Of course I don’t want to leave anyone.” She lifted her head slightly to look him in the eyes. “But I want to leave you least of all.”
“Because we’re partners? Because we’re Ouroboros?” Noah quickly shifted his eyes away. It was strange to see him so nervous. He usually seemed so sure of himself.
“Spark’s sake, Noah, that’s not it.”
“Well then, what is it?”
“I…” The words caught in her throat. Was she ready to say this? Was she ready to truly lay her emotions bare? But really, she had no choice. If not now, when would she get the chance to say it? “I think I love you, Noah.”
“Oh.” Noah barely even seemed to notice what she had said at first. Mio wondered how obvious she had truly been. But after a few moments, he stared back at Mio, his eyes wide. “You love me?”
Mio shook her head. Of course he didn’t feel the same way. They barely even knew what “love” meant. He hadn’t had the same warmth in his soul building for months, desperate for a name. “I see. I’m sorry, Noah. Forget I said that.” She began to shift away, but Noah put an arm around her.
“No, Mio. Do you mean that?”
“Why in the flames would I say that if I didn’t mean it?” she sniped. If he didn’t return her feelings, what was the point in continuing this line of questioning? “Look, it doesn’t matter if you don’t feel the same. It’s how I feel. If it’s misplaced, then I’ll work to move on.”
“Mio, you don’t have to. I think I… might love you too.”
Mio stared at him, her mouth agape. “Really?”
Noah silently nodded. “When Monica told us, back in the City, all I could imagine was me and you. I know you, Mio. I know you like I know myself. If I could be by anyone’s side, it would be yours.” He lifted his other hand to her cheek. “For all this time, I’ve been dreading the end of this journey. Dreading losing you. Just the thought is like one heart being torn in two. If that isn’t love, I don’t know what is.”
Mio chuckled weakly. “Noah, you absolute muppet! Falling in love with a girl nearing the end of her Term!”
“It’s not like I chose this, you know!” The sun was beginning to rise now, and the tears in his eyes glimmered in the light. “You’re just a very easy person to love.”
“Oh, Noah. My Noah.” Tears pricked at the corners of her own eyes. “I guess we’re both fools, then.”
Noah smiled. Sparks alive, his smile was so beautiful. She could stare at it forever. “I guess we are.” He leaned forward a little, his breath hot on her lips. “In the City, I saw two women doing something. They were pressing their mouths together. A kiss, they called it? I think it's something people do… when they’re in love.”
“What of it? Would you like to try?”
Noah thought for a moment. “Yes. More than anything.”
“Noah, think about this.” Mio pulled back. “I don’t want to get you too attached to me. I don’t have all that much time left.”
Noah’s smile grew wider. “You should have thought of that a long time ago.”
Mio shook her head. “What’s the point in this? It’s pointless to begin anything now. I’ll be dead and gone before you know it. Why make it hurt more?”
“Well,” said Noah, “the fact that you don’t have much time left makes it much more urgent, doesn’t it? And as for making your loss hurt, I think it will hurt more if you died before I ever got the chance to do this.” He tilted her face upwards until their eyes met. “I’ll ask you point-blank: do you want to kiss me, Mio?”
Mio’s mind was racing. This felt like a mistake. She should never have told him, never broached this ground, never given Noah reason to hurt more. But the look in his eyes, pure affection and yearning, melted her resolve. “Yes. I think I do.”
“Then it’s settled.” He took in a shaky breath and closed his eyes. “I love you, Mio.”
“I love you too.”
She slowly leaned forward, her lips meeting his. She rested her hand on the back of his neck, pulling him closer. The spark she felt where they met was more invigorating than anything she’d ever felt. His arms wrapped around her waist, gentle and strong. She wasn’t sure how long they stayed like that. Maybe it was only a moment, maybe it was forever.
Noah leaned back, face beet red. “ Queen’s wings ,” he gasped. “Is that how it was supposed to feel?”
Mio laughed, clear as a bell. “You ask the wrong person.” She ran her slender fingers through his hair. “You know, you look quite nice with your hair down.”
“Thank you. It’s not exactly practical, though, with all the fighting we get into.”
“Practical be damned. You’re the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen, and you should let it show more often.”
“Mio!”
She laughed again. It was strange to think that she was crying so soon before. “Come on. The others must be waking up now.”
“Oh, right.” Noah pulled himself to his feet and offered his hand. “Be careful not to fall off the edge.”
Mio grabbed his hand and rose. “Now, if I remember, it was your turn to make breakfast?”
Noah slapped his free hand against his face. “Spark it all! That’s why I got up in the first place, to get it ready before everyone woke up! But when I heard you playing, I just got completely sidetracked!”
“Don’t worry. I’ll help you, and I’m sure Manana will be willing to help too.” Mio smiled up at him. “Now, shall we be off?”
Noah smiled right back. “Sounds good to me.”
The two made their way back to the camp, hand in hand. Eunie would clearly have a comment to make about that, but Mio didn’t care much. It felt like a weight had been lifted off her shoulders, like she could die with one less regret. She may not have had much time left, but she was going to treasure every second she could spend with Noah. He smiled at her as they reentered the campsite. Lanz groggily made his way out of his tent, and immediately stopped to stare at the pair. “Oi, wait a second. Where were you two? What’s with the look on your faces?”
“It’s nothing, really,” said Noah. “Mio and I just had a talk in private.”
Eunie’s head poked out of the girl’s tent, wings flapping excitedly. “ In private , you say? Noah, you absolute scoundrel! Have you gone and stolen our dear Mio’s heart?”
Sena’s head poked out next, an awestruck expression on her face. “Wait, seriously? Mimi, what happened out there?”
“By the flames, you two, must you intrude?” Taion emerged from the boy’s tent, adjusting his glasses. “They said it was private, so it’s private. Honestly, have you no decency?”
“And must you squash all our fun? I like to know what’s going on in my friend’s lives!” Eunie yawned and left the tent. “Anyway, they can tell us what happened over breakfast! Noah promised eggs!”
“Yes, I suppose I did promise that.” Noah started rummaging around in the group’s various packs. “Manana, where did you put the eggs?”
“In green pack, next to fire!” The Nopon rolled her way out of the tent. “Let Manana help! Manana know the most scrumptious recipe!”
“Manana’s helping? Awesome!” Sena followed Eunie from the tent. “Let me help too!”
“No way! Manana remember last time Sena help her!”
As the group settled into their usual morning banter, Mio took a seat next to the fire pit. In the City, they had told her about another thing. “Family,” they called it. Mio figured it must feel something like this. The smell of cooking filled the air, and Mio made a vow. She would carry every last second with her family, and her Noah, in her heart forever. She may be at death’s door, but nothing would stop her from treasuring every last moment left. Nothing at all.