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AITA for resenting my little brother?
So first, a little background. I (M19) was taken in (not ever legally adopted, but that's another story) when I was 9 by my dad (M38) after my parents died. His parents also died when he was a kid, so he was able to help me a lot with my anger issues after it happened and find my place in the world. One of the main ways he did that was by letting me help with the family business. He initially didn’t want me involved because I was too young, but I was stubborn and made a whole position for myself that I worked really hard for. I’d like to think that eventually, he saw me not just as a son, but as a partner. But by the time I was 18, I felt like he was far too controlling and still saw me as a kid. I felt that I wasn’t respected as an equal, and it started to cause a bunch of fights until eventually I had enough and left. I moved in with some friends and we started our own business. I completely reinvented myself just to stop getting associated with him and make a name for my own.
We didn’t talk for a long time, until I finally caved and started helping out with family stuff here and there, but it's still tense. Then, not even a YEAR after I left, I went back to the house and found a random child in the home. He adopted another kid (who literally looks like me too?) without asking or even telling me. I know it's not like I need to give him permission to adopt a child, but I wish he’d at least talked to me about it, you know? But by the time I met the kid, J (M10), the paperwork had already been finalized and I had a little brother. The real kicker is that he had taken my position in the family business. The one that I made myself to help mourn the loss of my murdered parents? Anyway, so my dad, who has the emotional intelligence of packing peanuts, barely said anything about my new brother. No apologies for replacing him in my position or anything. He just explained J’s background which is, admittedly, rough. And I really feel bad for not liking him because he’s a good kid and he really does look up to me and wants to spend time with me as brothers, but every time I see him I can’t help but be reminded by how my dad replaced me in business and in his life. I was even told that my dad almost gave him my old room (we’re very well off and have plenty of extra rooms). I’m not exactly mad at the kid, but so many of his little comments about what my dad does with him that he didn’t want to do with me hurts. Am I the asshole?