Chapter Text
“Hyung?” Matthew called, sitting up from his bed at the sound of the door opening, “Have you got my shoes– Oh.” He cut himself off, blinking the sleep out of his eyes as he registered who the man in the doorway was, “Hanbin-hyung.”
Sung Hanbin smiled pleasantly at him from the entry to his dorm room, “Disappointed? Who were you waiting for?”
“Come on, I’m not disappointed . I just asked Hao… Hao-hyung to help take my training shoes from the training room if he was going to go practice more, so I thought he was coming back for me,” Matthew stifled a yawn, “Why’re you here?”
The next thing he knew, Hanbin was climbing up the steps to his bed, hair in a mess and nearly hitting the ceiling with his head. Matthew squinted at him, “Could you not stick your ass out so much? The camera’s in that direction.”
“Don’t swear , Matthew,” Hanbin pulled himself up onto the bed, which groaned under their weight, “I missed you! How’s Kill This Love’s G group coming along?”
Matthew sighed, “I don’t know if this bed can handle the both of us.”
“Of course it can, you’re so skinny, you have to eat more,” Hanbin scoffed incredulously, then added as an afterthought, “Me too, I guess.” Expression turning serious, he prodded Matthew in the side, “What’s going on? You haven’t answered my question.”
He chose his next words carefully so as to not worry Hanbin.
“It’s coming along pretty well, Keita’s doing a good job, Hao can hit all the high notes, Zihao’s a great dancer–”
Hanbin meets his eyes firmly, “What about you ?”
Damn it. Matthew should have known that his thoughts wouldn’t have escaped Hanbin’s observant gaze. He’s never really been able to hide anything from Hanbin in the years they were friends, really, and he doesn’t know if that’s because he’s a bad actor or if Hanbin’s just too sensitive to his emotions.
“I’m worried, hyung. I’m worried that my part’s too small for me to be able to showcase myself well enough,” he shook his head, “I saw my ranking after the second episode was released, and it’s not low, but nobody knows how these survival shows go…”
The current first place stares back at him, gaze searching, but when he spoke again, his voice was soft and comforting, “You know, you don’t have to have the killing part to shine. You’re only the killing part if you can truly shine brighter than all your groupmates, and every part can become killing in its own way if you make it yours. And I mean really yours, with your own special touch and charm.”
“What if I’m not charming enough, hyung?” Matthew blinks back some moistness in his eyes, voice dropping to a worried whisper, “What if the audience thinks… that I’m just using you for clout since you’re popular?”
Hanbin looks torn between crying and laughing.
“What?” Matthew shoots back, slightly hurt.
“No, it’s just… I was ready to give you a whole inspirational speech, and then you said the word clout and I kind of fell apart,” Hanbin smiles apologetically, “But I want you to know one thing.”
Matthew knows Hanbin didn’t mean it. They’ve known each other for long enough after all. Grinning, he elbows Hanbin gently, “That I should never say the word ‘clout’ again?”
“ No, Matthew. That you are charming,” Hanbin makes such intense eye contact that Matthew can’t help but look away. His shoulders are quickly grabbed, though, and he’s forcibly made to look at Hanbin again, “You’re one of the most charming people I’ve ever met. You have a great personality, you’re talented, you can dance, you can sing, and– and…”
Touched, Matthew’s lips curled upwards. Hanbin had never been stingy with compliments, but this was their first heart-to-heart ever since joining Boys Planet, and it wasn’t the same as before. He didn't catch the last part, though.
“Huh?”
“I said,” Hanbin broke eye contact, ears turning a little pink, “so many people like you. You deserve to be liked, to be popular…”
“It… didn’t sound that long,” Matthew shrugged, finding his grin again, “Why don’t you tell me what else you were gonna praise me for?”
Hanbin looked like he really wanted to squirm out of Matthew’s reach, tips of his ears turning even pinker. He was silent for a long while after that. Just when Matthew thought Hanbin wasn’t going to respond, and was beginning to consider just letting it go and moving on, Hanbin mumbled something quickly.
Matthew heard it this time. He’d said, “ You’re really hot. ”
Before he had time to process it, though, the door was flung open loudly, a brunet announcing his return with a laugh that quickly dwindled into nothingness. Zhang Hao looked at the duo on Matthew’s bed with thinly veiled disbelief, which quickly morphed into a knowing smile as he took in Hanbin’s hands on Matthew’s shoulders, and Matthew’s hands on Hanbin’s thigh… Oh, and Hanbin’s ears were still pink.
To make matters worse, Matthew could feel his face heating up, and if he were to estimate a shade of red his face was at that present moment, he’d say scarlet.
“Ohhhhhhhh,” Hao still had Matthew’s converse pinched between two fingers delicately in his right hand, “Am I interrupting something, guys? Cause, like, I can go find Yujin or something…”
“NO!” Matthew all but screamed, shoving Hanbin into the wall accidentally with the amount of force he used, “It’s not like that, Hao-hyung, don’t read it wrongly, we’re just friends! ”
Hao quirked an eyebrow, taking great pleasure in their pain, and Matthew wanted to punch that pretty face of his in. The Chinese boy smiled, devious, almost devilish, “Hmm? I never said anything. I could have been interrupting a heart-to-heart between… What was it, just friends ?”
Why had Matthew never realised how evil Hao could be before that moment?
It got worse.
“Unless, of course, that’s not what it was,” Hao’s grin widened, “After all, you both are quite red. Anyway, remember the cameras! I’m gonna go practice now. Matthew, see you in a bit.”
Matthew couldn’t decide if he was more embarrassed or angry, to be honest. Scowling, he glared at the Chinese boy until the other practically pirouetted out the door. Hanbin still looked mortified, but managed to squeak out a “Bye, hyung” before Hao disappeared completely.
“Right,” Hanbin avoided his gaze, “Um… Let’s not sit so close next time.”
Matthew frowned, feeling a pang of something in his heart, “That’s… yeah, let’s not. I’m… going to practice. I’ll see you.”
In an attempt to lighten the mood, he groaned, “Man, Hao still has my converse.”
“Honorifics,” Hanbin reminded him half-heartedly, reaching a silent agreement to smooth over what had just happened, “Do you not have another pair of shoes?”
“Takuto borrowed my other shoes,” Matthew clucked his tongue, “Whatever, if I run fast enough, the cold won’t be able to get through my socks.”
“Sure, whatever,” Hanbin rolled his eyes, “I’m not sure I understand what’s going on with the sharing of shoes in your dorm. Just wear Ollie’s then, they’re right there.”
“Fair,” Matthew jumped down from the bed, “I’ll see you at dinner, then?”
“See you.”