Archive of Our Own

— (1) matthew smells something suspicious

It’s a lot quieter, Matthew thinks, now that the trainees who have been eliminated in the first round have left. They’re 52 men strong now, a measly number compared to the original 98. He’d said as much to Hiroto, who’d smiled at him, shrugging sadly. The survival show veteran was more used to goodbyes, he supposed.

Above all, Matthew’s grateful that he was able to rise up the ranks so much. P02! Just a step below Hanbin, higher than he could have ever imagined. But at the same time, he found tears in his eyes as he remembered the trainees who had left—they’d barely spent a month together, him not even being able to name all of them, and now they were leaving.

He didn’t know if they’d meet again.

Matthew isn’t given much time to wallow in spiralling sadness, though, because Hanbin walks into the room, Ricky and Gyuvin on his heels. 

“Hey, darling,” he calls lazily, lips quirking up as Ricky takes a deep, calming breath and looks away, “What’s the matter, darling ?”

“Aww,” Hanbin flutters his eyelashes, “Nothing, babe. Just missed you.”

“I hate this conversation,” Ricky grits through clenched teeth, “The two of you have serious issues and need to be cancelled right at this moment.”

Gyuvin gasps, “Oh, Ricky dear, you’re homophobic ?”

“Yeah,” Ricky punches him on the arm, “Don’t you know I hate gay people? Especially those two.”

Hao kicks the door closed behind him as he joins them, pushing Ricky gently, “Now, now. I don’t like self-deprecating jokes.”

Hanbin has found his way to Matthew, happily playing with his fingers as he sits on the bed next to him. Seeing as his boyfriend was going to be absolutely useless, Matthew takes it upon himself to get the couple involved in the conversation, “Ricky-ah, weren’t you bisexual?”

“ No. I am straight,” Ricky looks up at him from his position on the floor, “Gyuvin, can you move your hand? My head has no space on your lap. Thank you.”

Gyuvin does move, but not before slapping his head, “If you were straight, then who was that basketball player when you were fourteen, huh?”

“Kim Gyuvin,” Ricky glares at him, “That was a summer fling.”

“That was a man.”

“Fine, maybe I am not straight,” Ricky sighs, “Doesn’t change the fact that I hate gay people.”

“You don’t have to be salty that you’re single,” Hao muses, “See, Hanbin’s become a brainless himbo ever since he got together with Matthew.”

“Hey,” Matthew protests mildly, “That’s not true.”

“Yeah,” Hanbin adds matter-of-factly, “I’ve also become slutty.”

Hao makes a disgusted face at them, “I agree with Ricky, actually. You two are disgusting. Anyway, my point is , it’s fine to be single. I’m single. I’m happy.”

“Right, and I’m sure your face has to be that close to Keita’s for that move in Kill This Love,” Matthew hums.

“It does.”

It most certainly does not, but Matthew holds his tongue. That was a conversation topic for another day. Before Matthew can say anything, Gyuvin cuts in, “Ricky, it really is quite an L for you to still be single though. After all, you like both genders. You could go for anyone . But nobody likes you back!”

Ricky growls at Gyuvin from his lap, “I am going to make sure you can never have kids.”

Gyuvin’s jaw drops, “First of all, I’m gay. Second of all, just because I’m gay doesn’t mean you can threaten to bite my dick off!”

“I was not threatening to bite your dick off!”

“Yes you were,” Matthew gives him a look of pity. Hanbin nods his assent too, because it’s not as if Hanbin disagrees with anything Matthew says nowadays.

“This is very crass language indeed,” Hao raises his eyebrows, “Nobody will be biting anyone’s dick off because that is kind of kinky and we have a strict no-NSFW policy.” He eyes Matthew and Hanbin warily, prompting Hanbin to sit up a little straighter.

“I’m not into that,” Hanbin defends with a smile, “We have more of a… Justin Bieber quotes relationship.”

“What,” Matthew deadpans, “Are you talking about.”

“What did Justin Bieber even say ?” Gyuvin wonders aloud, “Nothing good, probably.”

“He said “Who’s ready to suck the depression out of my titties tonight.”, I think,” Ricky supplies helpfully, earning himself judgemental stares from all around, “What?”

“Dude,” Gyuvin makes a face, “Why do you know this?”

“SHEN QUANRUI,” Hao grabs Ricky’s ear, “Nobody is sucking anyone’s titties.”

Ricky makes a noncommittal noise and gestures towards Matthew.

“ You– ” Hao twists his ear until he hears Ricky yelp in pain, then letting go, a satisfied expression sitting on his face, “Had better stop talking about eating other people’s body parts.”

“Uh,” Matthew offers, “Uh. I will not be elaborating more on what happens under the sheets and would appreciate it if it is not mentioned again.”

Hanbin blinks, bewildered, “I kinda meant, an if I were your boyfriend I’d never let you go kind of relationship.”

“You are so fucking stupid,” Gyuvin hisses at Ricky, “Why do you always say the most out of pocket things?”

“I have literally not said anything!”

“You just claimed that you’re a homophobe who remembers shit Justin Bieber posted on his Instagram story like six years ago.”

“See,” Ricky sighs, “This is why I need a boyfriend. Someone has to hold me back from saying the weirdest shit and getting flamed for it.”

“I don’t think you’re bisexual,” Matthew grins, “I think you are gay.”

“While you’re on the very long and unsuccessful journey of finding a boyfriend, you have me,” Gyuvin frowns, “I can ground you.”

Ricky looks at him mournfully, “It’s not the same.”

Matthew looks between the two of them, eyebrows raised. He knew Ricky was desperate, but Gyuvin offering to be anything other than Ricky’s, quote unquote, greatest nightmare? Shocking.

Hanbin’s lips are at his ear now, mumbling, “Is it just me or… is something kind of fishy?”

“Something doesn’t add up,” Matthew agrees, “I’m not sure what, but something .”

— (2) matthew doesn’t remember being this stupid

“I need help ,” Gyuvin declares, marching in the room, “From the both of you. Because Hao-ge helped push the Mattbin agenda and Matthew-hyung managed to live out a Disney princess romance story.”

Hao looks up from his training diary, “Just because you did exactly what I said not to do and threw your dirty clothes on your bed does not mean you can join me on mine.”

“I am not going to help you clog a toilet,” Matthew sighs, “Why don’t you go find Ricky instead?”

Gyuvin looks like he’s going through an internal struggle. Matthew waits.

“It’s about Ricky,” Gyuvin mutters glumly, “I need advice.”

“If you need advice, you kneel down and grovel like a peasant, not slam the door and try to sit on my bed with your dirty ass pants– KIM GYUVIN,” Hao pokes him in the back with the cap of his pen. Shutting his notebook, Hao resigns to his fate as a group therapist, “Fine. What do you want?”

Matthew weighs his options and decides he’d rather listen in to Gyuvin’s problems than take a nap at 8pm. Making his way down from the top bunk, he sits himself down in front of the mirror opposite Hao’s bed, “I actually think this mirror should be shifted.”

“Yeah,” Hao agrees, “Every time I wake up in the middle of the night I’m terrified I look into the mirror and the face that stares back does not belong to me.”

“Mhm,” Gyuvin nods impatiently, “Hyungs, you know I like Ricky right?”

Matthew blinks. And blinks again. And again. Finding himself at a loss for words, he smiles, tight-lipped, at Hao. The Chinese boy looks shocked, but not considerably startled, and Matthew’s starting to think he should’ve seen this coming too. 

It’s not exactly surprising, per se, because they spend way too much time together and are both (Matthew thinks) beautiful, wonderful boys coming from the same company, but he still doesn’t know what to say.

Thankfully, Hao finds his voice first, “Well, yes. But I thought it would be an oblivious best friends case like those two,” he gives Matthew a long look, “So I didn’t know you’d be clear about your own feelings.”

“Huh,” Matthew considers the situation, “Personally, I didn’t know. Wouldn’t be unexpected though, if you spend too much time with someone and they’re good to you… Mm.”

“Yeah, you would know,” Hao rolls his eyes.

“I would,” Matthew nods, smiling.

“No, okay, yes, but do you think he doesn’t like me and is purposely ignoring my signals, or is he just not receiving them?” Gyuvin sucks his cheeks in, “Because I really think I’m being quite obvious.”

“With what , exactly?” Matthew can’t help but ask.

“Yesterday I told him I could ground him and he didn’t need a boyfriend.”

Hao rolls his eyes, exchanging another look with Matthew, “That was not an obvious signal. I’m pretty sure he just found it weird.”

“Weird?”

“I found it weird,” Matthew volunteers, shrugging, “If that helps at all.”

The younger huffs, “But I’ve gone out of my way to be nice to him too! And praise him!”

“You literally called him, and I quote, so fucking stupid,” Hao arches an eyebrow, “And he’s good to you too, right? I’m pretty sure treating each other well isn’t exclusive to couples, you know.”

“I brought him food the other day.”

“And does Ricky do that for you too?” Matthew asks.

“Yeah, he does.”

Sometimes, his friends were so stupid. Matthew’s eyebrows knit together, “So what does that mean, Gyuvin?”

Gyuvin’s eyes brighten, “That he likes me too?”

Matthew cannot decide whether to be proud or disappointed in him, to be honest. This whole situation sounded almost as bad as when Hanbin and himself were pining over each other, except he’s pretty sure they were both more cowardly. Still, though, Matthew didn’t remember being this annoying.

Hao’s long-suffering expression suggests otherwise, but Matthew ignores it. He’s pretty sure Ricky has no idea Gyuvin likes him, and doesn’t see Gyuvin as anything other than a friend, though. 

“I think–”

Hao cuts him off, “Oh, my child, you are so delusional.”

Gyuvin looks crestfallen, but Hao just continues, “Firstly, I don’t think Ricky knows you like him because you have been sending zero signals. Not even mixed. Just no signals.” He holds up a hand, stopping Gyuvin from protesting, “Listen to me. I got Mattbin together and they were really fucking stupid.”

Matthew narrows his eyes.

“ Next , I am also at least 99% sure that Ricky does not like you because if he did he would’ve said something about it because he cannot keep his mouth shut.”

“Also, he’d probably look at you when he complains about not having a boyfriend. Or when he laughs,” Matthew adds, “I read in a book that psychology says you’ll look at the person you like when you laugh.”

“He does look at me when he laughs,” Gyuvin argues, “Or is that just because I’m the one who cracked the joke?”

“Might be because you’re the joke,” Hao pulls a loose thread out of his blanket, “If you’re so sure that Ricky likes you back, why don’t you just confess?”

Gyuvin deflates, “What if he doesn’t? I need to make him fall in love with me, Hao-ge.”

Matthew grins, “So you have to court him.”

“Yes.”

“And you want advice on how to court him,” he continues.

“Yes.”

“You’ve come to the right person,” Matthew decides, “I will help you win Han Ricky’s heart if it’s the last thing I do.” He looks, proudly, at Hao, “After all, I did convince the nation's center to fall for me, and Hao-hyung is still single.”

“That was unnecessary,” Hao wags a finger at Matthew, “Why don’t you start by being direct, and giving him more compliments?”

Gyuvin nods, deep in thought, “Got it. I’ll update tomorrow!”

Matthew is a little worried, but Gyuvin looks sufficiently confident, so he supposes they’ll be fine. 

–

The next day, Gyuvin walks into the practice room during lunch break, heading straight for Ricky. 

“Ricky.”

Ricky jerks his chin at Gyuvin by way of reply.

“I think we shouldn’t be best friends anymore,” Gyuvin looks him in the eye and tells him, dead serious, “You have beautiful eyes.”

Hao, who has the misfortune of being at the scene, buries his face in his hands. Matthew, who also has the misfortune of being at the scene, sighs audibly.

Ricky looks visibly confused. Frowning, he leaned back, putting some distance between him and Gyuvin’s too-close face, “...What?”

“I said,” Gyuvin repeats firmly, “Your milky brown orbs hold the entire universe.”

The other boy moves even further away, “A– Are you okay?” 

Hao grips Matthew’s wrist, “What is he doing?”

Matthew hisses back, “I don’t know, I think he stole some lines off Wattpad.”

Still clearly in both hearing range and their line of vision, Gyuvin smiles at Ricky (Matthew thinks it’s quite creepy, actually), cocking his head, “Ah, let me try again. I like your hair!”

Ricky blinks very rapidly, “Thank you!” Raising a hand, he pushes Gyuvin away, “Do you have a fever or something?”

“No, I don’t,” Gyuvin rocks back onto his heels, “I feel fine.”

“I feel faint,” Ricky mumbles.

“Oh, me too, darling,” Matthew cringes, “Me too.”

— (3) matthew tries to change Gyuvin’s approach

When Gyuvin returns to their dorm room after the fiasco in the training room, Matthew loses it.

He’d agreed with Hao that they’d glare at him when he walked in, but all Matthew can think about is Gyuvin’s “Your milky brown orbs hold the entire universe.” , and he can’t quite hold the giggles in. 

Hao throws him a disapproving look. Still giggling and stomping his feet on the floor, Matthew clutches onto Hao and leans near, “Hao-hyung, your milky brown orbs hold the entire universe .”

Gyuvin looks on sadly from the foot of his bed as Hao slaps Matthew on the back, snorting with laughter as he recalls Ricky’s reaction. Gasping, he suddenly pushed Matthew away hard, “ A– Are you okay? ”

Before Matthew can dissolve into giggles again, he spits out a very bad impression of Gyuvin, making kissy faces at Hao, “Ooh, no, Quanrui-ah, I’m not okay, I want to kiss you soooo bad.”

Hao makes a noise between a laugh and a shriek, batting at Matthew with his hands, so Matthew, of course, laughs so hard he finds tears in his eyes.

After they’ve calmed down somewhat, Gyuvin speaks up, “Was it really that bad?”

Reaching his hand up, Matthew wipes off imaginary tears, “Oh dear. It was that bad, and worse .”

“Ah,” Gyuvin cringes, “I guess I fucked up.”

“No,” Hao deadpans, “I still don’t get how you managed to misinterpret ‘be direct and give him more compliments’ so badly. You just told him you didn’t think you wanted to be best friends anymore.”

“Do you think he noticed?” Gyuvin’s chewing on his lower lip now, “Like, the rest of it was probably weird, but that was hurtful, right?”

Matthew swings his legs up onto Hao’s bed, ignoring Hao’s glare, “I think the rest of it was so weird that he forgot about that line. I forgot about that line too until Hao-hyung brought it up.”

Hao pulls the corner of his blanket out from under Matthew, “You told me your height was 185cm until I said I was 180.”

“Ah, but that wasn’t me forgetting. That was on purpose.”

“What do I do now, then? How am I even supposed to salvage this?” Gyuvin picks at his thumbnail, “It’s not like you were very clear on what being direct and giving compliments meant.”

Matthew really wants to laugh but thinks it may cause Gyuvin substantial amounts of trauma if he bursts out laughing again, so he keeps it in. “We meant—and by we I mean Hao-hyung, me, and every other normal person—give him direct compliments. Like tell him he’s dancing really well or whatever. Stop calling him stupid and ugly if you don’t mean it.”

“I said his eyes were pretty,” Gyuvin glances up, “I think that was pretty direct.”

“That was not a compliment,” Matthew sighs, “That was a threat.”

“Where did you even get the quote from? Do kids these days still read Wattpad?” Hao muses, “That was really quite a horrible way to tell him he had pretty eyes.”

“Junhyeon told me.”

The smile slips off Matthew’s face, “Of course he did. He probably thought you were joking.”

Hao fluffs up a pillow, remarking thoughtfully, “I wouldn’t be too sure about the thinking you were joking part. Still, Junhyeon ?”

“He looks like he has W rizz,” Gyuvin defends himself, “Like, have you seen his fake ab flash?”

“A masterpiece.” “A disaster.” Gyuvin and Hao say together, in decidedly different tones.

“That was a rhetorical question, Hao-ge. It was a masterpiece,” Gyuvin purses his lips, “Okay, but where do I go from here?”

“I think you should pretend this never happened,” Matthew nods to himself, “There is no way to explain this except a sudden new sense of humour that you just acquired.”

“Which is not even a bad explanation,” he quickly adds, “Better than whatever you’d tell him if it was up to you.”

“Hyung,” Gyuvin groans, “I would not do anything bad!” Eyes lighting up, he sat up a bit straighter, “Don’t you think it would be effective if I did some… show, not tell thing? Instead of talking. I can do things for him!”

Matthew cocks his head, “Show, not tell?”

Clearly used to this, Hao translates, “Actions speak louder than words.”

“Oh,” Matthew says, lamely.

“I think that’s not an altogether bad idea,” Hao bites his tongue gently, “But I have to remind you that execution is important, so you can’t just think of chasing Ricky as a concept and not do anything in real life.”

“Any concrete actions you want to suggest before I fuck things up again?” Gyuvin grins in good sport, “Now that I think about it, it was really quite funny. No wonder Ricky avoided me for the next hour.”

“If I were Ricky, I would avoid you for the next three weeks,” Matthew tells him point-blank, “Why don’t you bring him water or something?”

“Hot water with red dates and chrysanthemum,” Hao slams a fist into the bed, “In a thermos flask. Old Chinese remedy, he’ll probably know about it, it’s good for people who always stay up late. My grandma used to make it all the time whenever I’d stay up to practise or study”

“That,” Matthew gestures at Hao, “I don’t think you can go wrong with that. Just don’t tell him it’s to replenish nutrients because he looks skinny, pathetic and weak.”

“I wouldn’t do that,” Gyuvin drags out the last word, “Or maybe I would.”

“Good luck,” Matthew half-grins, “Try not to fuck this up, okay?”

Hao puts his hands together, chanting what sounded distinctly like a Buddhist chant, “I have faith in you. I just chanted a Taoist mantra to help you gain luck in your love life.”

Gyuvin makes a face, “That was a Buddhist chant telling me to not kill rabbits, but okay. I can do this. I will not fuck it up.”

“How do you know that?” Matthew can’t help but ask.

Gyuvin waves a hand in the air, “Oh, you know. Ricky.”

“Can you boil water?” 

Matthew is genuinely worried about Gyuvin’s ability to keep himself safe anywhere near boiling water, and the fear isn’t really appeased when Gyuvin waves a hand nonchalantly, saying he’d ask Junhyeon for help.

Hao shares the same sentiment, “Please do not fucking ask Kum Junhyeon for help.”

“Fine,” Gyuvin huffs, “I’ll ask Seo Won.”

“Sounds good to me,” Matthew waves him out of the room, “Now before you get any more ideas, go carry this out.”

–

Sung Hanbin wasn’t intending to get up for another hour, at least, when Gyuvin walks into their dorm at 5am with a thermos flask in his hand. Voice still groggy with sleep, he tries to croak out a greeting, but Gyuvin holds a finger to his lips, motioning at a still-sleeping Ricky and the mysterious flask.

Hanbin frowns, but it’s too early to deal with this, so he just peers over the railing of his top bunk to look at whatever Gyuvin intends to do to Ricky on the opposite bunk. He hopes Gyuvin isn’t going to pour scalding water on Ricky, because if he does, then Hanbin can’t even claim plausible deniability.

Gyuvin leans down, face inches away from Ricky, and pokes his cheek. Hanbin makes a mental note to tell Matthew about this later.

Ricky blinks tiredly, eyes unfocused.

In a loud, reverberating whisper, Gyuvin says into Ricky’s ear, “You slept late last night, right? You look kind of tired.” Shaking the flask, he moves to uncap it as Ricky scrambles to sit up, almost hitting his head on the bottom of Gyuvin’s bunk.

Pinching his nose bridge, Ricky manages a shaky, “What is this?”

Hanbin really wants to know too, actually. He’s interested in why the fuck Gyuvin is in their room at 5am with a suspicious looking flask, too!

Gyuvin’s voice is maintained at a creepy whisper, “Old Chinese remedy. Hao-hyung’s grandma used to make it for him all the time. Works wonders.”

Uncapping the flask, he holds it up to Ricky’s lips, “Here, drink.”

“What has Zhang Hao’s grandmother got to–” Opening his mouth to say something in response, Ricky is force-fed the concoction, sputtering and gasping the moment the liquid hits his tongue.

“Is it not good?” Gyuvin waves a hand in front of Ricky’s face, “Ricky?”

Ricky glares at him, breathing heavily, “This water is fucking boiling hot .”

Hanbin’s mouth makes an ‘O’ shape, furrowing his eyebrows. Leaning forward, he tries to manoeuvre himself into a more comfortable position.

“What time is it?”

“5am,” Hanbin supplies helpfully, looking at his watch.

Ricky doesn’t even take a moment to wonder why Hanbin’s looking at them like he just got Cat 1 tickets to a performance of the Swan Lake ballet, turning back to Gyuvin with a vengeance, “What the fuck are you doing in my room at 5am?”

“I thought you’d need a remedy for staying up too late practising! I wanted to do something nice for you!”

Ricky looks like he’s going to cry, “I appreciate it, Gyuvin, I really do, but if you let me sleep until 8am, I’d be getting 5 hours of sleep. As it is, I have 2 hours and a scalded tongue.”

Very well put, Hanbin thinks, very well put indeed. 

The boy looks up at Hanbin, then apparently deciding not to process his presence, pulls his blanket back up over himself and pats Gyuvin’s shoulder, sighing, “Goodnight, Gyuvin. Thanks for the water.”

“Goodnight,” Gyuvin whispers back.

Hanbin waves. 

As Gyuvin makes his way out of the room, Hanbin vaguely hears him mumble something, the general gist of which was the attempt was a success because Ricky looked happy and wished him goodnight. 

He doesn’t know what Gyuvin’s thinking, but in Hanbin’s humble opinion, Ricky looked like he was neither happy nor having a good night.

This is all too much to unpack at 5am in the morning, so Hanbin goes back to sleep, satisfied with the spectacle and ready to tell Matthew everything at a more decent hour.

Matthew was going to love it.

— (4) matthew lets gyuvin take matters into his own hands

Matthew had a really good night’s sleep.

Practice had ended really early the night before, and they all went to rest before midnight (a rare occurrence), so he doesn’t understand why Seo Won’s sporting deep eyebags at the cafeteria table. 

“Morning,” he puts his lunchbox down, “Didn’t rest well?”

Seo Won yawns around a mouthful of egg, “It’s all your fucking fault.”

“Whoa,” Hao joins them, “What’s with the swearing today? You’re not like this, Seo Won-ah. What did Matthew do to you?”

The Korean boy glares back at him, “It’s your fault, too.”

The two culprits look at each other as realisation dawns on them. Matthew just shrugs, so Hao takes one for the team and puts on a guilty expression, grinning apologetically, “Ah… Is it Gyuvin?”

“ Is it Gyuvin ,” Seo Won mocks, “It took four fucking hours to teach him how to boil water! Then another hour for him to ransack my room for chrysanthemum!”

Matthew smiles angelically, “Did you have it?”

“Obviously not—why the fuck would I?” Seo Won rubs his eyes, “He went to dig it out of Shuaibo’s luggage in the end. At 4am.”

Distracted by Hanbin’s arrival, Matthew hums in response, reaching up for a hug. Hanbin ruffles his hair, eyes crinkling at him as he takes a seat, turning towards Seo Won, “You know, when he came to find me it was 5am.”

Hao frowns, “What did Gyuvin go find you for? Red dates?”

Hanbin claps, “Right! Matthew darling, I forgot to tell you, but Gyuvin brought a thermos flask into my room at 5am for Ricky.”

“I want to hear all about it,” Hao sits a little straighter.

“Does Matthew, though?” Hanbin leans into Matthew slightly, “I don’t care about you.”

“SUNG HANBIN,” Hao laughs, stealing a sausage from his breakfast plate, “Tell me now or I’ll kidnap Matthew and you’ll never see him again.”

“Okay, okay, fine!” Hanbin throws his hands up, “It was really interesting.”

“Does no one care about me,” Seo Won grimaces, “I was the one who had to suffer the whole night with Gyuvin because he insisted that Hao and Matthew told him to ask me how to boil water.”

Matthew arches an eyebrow, “You want to hear about Gyuvin chasing Ricky or not.”

“Oh,” Seo Won eyes Matthew’s eggs, so Matthew pushes his plate over, “So it was about Ricky, was it?”

“Did he not tell you anything except blame it on us?” Hao sighs, “I meant to ask you tomorrow or something, not spend 4 hours in the wee hours of the night bothering you.”

Seo Won narrows his eyes, “Whatever. Tell me what happened. Did he succeed? Was Ricky touched?”

Hanbin shakes his head, “Ricky slept really late last night. Maybe 3am? Then Gyuvin came in at 5am to wake him up.”

“ No ,” Matthew groans, “Why is he like this?”

“That’s not even the worst part. He was whispering creepily the entire time and poured scalding water down Ricky’s throat,” Hanbin sighs, “I was on the opposite bed and it was really quite awful. Ricky was kind of pissed, I think, but Gyuvin seems to think it was a success because Ricky told him thank you and goodnight.”

Pulling Hao’s jacket over to cover himself as he leaned back, Hanbin launched into an imitation of his roommate, sighing exasperatedly, “Good night, Gyuvin. Thanks for the water.”

“That doesn’t sound good,” Hao remarks intelligently.

“No shit it doesn’t,” Matthew rolls his eyes, “Stupid boy.”

“It’s fine, I enjoy a challenge,” Hao rubs his jaw, “We should probably make up a list of things Gyuvin isn’t allowed to do if he wants to win Ricky over.”

Seo Won gets up, moving to sit with Jiwoong instead, “Guys, I’ll go make a move first, yeah?”

Hanbin bids him goodbye, “I think you may be trying too hard. Like, Gyuvin isn’t really the kind of person to do these kinds of really obvious and direct things, but he’s really sweet. He’s just bad at execution.”

“I don’t think you’re completely wrong,” Hao drums his fingers on the table, “Remember when for my birthday last year Gyuvin gave me a scrapbook of all our memories together? Best birthday gift ever.”

“I didn’t know you last year,” Matthew points out, “But that sounds wonderful. Why can’t Gyuvin do something like that for Ricky?”

“Maybe he’s bad at following instructions,” Hanbin suggests, “I was pretty bad at following instructions at 19. Look, Ricky’s birthday is coming up, right? Let Gyuvin plan him a birthday celebration, and we’ll help him carry it out.”

“I never thought I’d say this, but I wish he were more like you,” Hao makes a face, “At least you would automatically do nice things for Matthew.”

“I’m sure Ricky would fall for Gyuvin too if Gyuvin did his laundry,” Matthew giggles, “Or perhaps the potential for Ricky to like Gyuvin has always been there, we’ve just got to awaken it.”

“Hanbin, you do Matthew’s laundry?”

Hanbin grins, “Matthew’s only role in this relationship is to look pretty.”

“Not going to question that,” Hao gives him a sickly-sweet smile, “But I think Gyuvin saved his own ass from yesterday night, though. When I walked past their table, they were sitting together and Gyuvin was apologising for the bad timing.”

“What did Ricky say to that?”

“Said sorry he was so impatient since Gyuvin just caught him at a bad time. Thought it was a funny joke, though,” Hao places a hand over his heart, “I feel like they're getting more mature. At least they’re talking things out and I don’t have to solve their problems for them anymore. My babies are growing up.”

Matthew eyes him warily, “I feel like there’s years of trauma behind you saying that.”

“You feel right,” Hao stares into the distance, “It was a horrible time. Did you know they used to not be able to stand each other when they first joined the company?”

“Oh?” Hanbin takes a sip of water, “What was the issue?”

“Oh, teenage boys. Some stupid basketball competition,” Hao says dismissively, “Anyway, Hanbin-ah, you should join us tonight when we give him The Talk.”

“That’s so funny,” Hanbin wonders quizzically, “The Talk?”

“Where we give him advice, of course,” Matthew grins, “I think tonight we’re letting him take the reins, though.”

“I hope they get together soon,” Hao blows his nose, “This is all very tiring and I think I am falling sick.”

“No you’re not,” Hanbin frowns, “You just have allergic rhinitis.”

“Yeah, allergic to this bullshit.”

Matthew doesn’t think that’s how allergic rhinitis works, but whatever, he supposes.

— (5) matthew and hao trust Gyuvin very much (real)

“Hello, Gyuvin,” Hanbin smiles pleasantly at him from Matthew’s bed, “How are we feeling today?”

“Hanbin-hyung,” he replies, surprised, “Tired, I suppose. I didn’t get much sleep.”

Hao snorts, saying darkly, “I wonder why.”

“I don’t think the water worked, guys,” Gyuvin sighs, “I talked it out with him.”

“We talked things out too,” Matthew looks him straight in the eye, “We’re going to leave your future in your own hands.”

Betrayed, Gyuvin cries, “You’re giving up on me?”

“Oh,” Hao mutters under his breath, “I want to.”

“No,” Hanbin takes over diplomatically, “We think you’re actually a very sweet boy and will probably be able to handle this yourself, since our suggestions may not suit your relationship best and only you know Ricky–”

Impatiently, Matthew cuts him off, “He means you suck at following instructions and we are at our wits’ end.”

“Thanks,” Gyuvin blinks, “But I’ve run out of ideas, too.”

Hao arches an eyebrow, “You gave me that really cute scrapbook.”

Gyuvin shrugs, “I googled some ideas and thought you would like that. But I really don’t know what to do for Ricky anymore.”

“Write him a 25-page letter,” Hanbin suggests, “Do something so drastic he falls hard instead of making him fall for you gradually.”

Matthew pinches his elbow, “Look, Ricky’s birthday is coming up soon and we’re getting our next break after the 2nd mission in a few days. You have the opportunity, the occasion, and the time.”

“Oh, I was thinking about my present for him,” Gyuvin brightens a little, “Was considering cute metal rings with our names engraved into the insides?”

Matthew kicks his feet a little, absolutely excited by the idea. That was so cute , and so gay , and Ricky would love it so much.

Hao looks amused, “So basically wedding bands. Subtlety is not your strong suit, is it?”

Gyuvin ducks his head, blushing, “He wouldn’t recognise my attraction to him if it were dancing in front of him naked.”

“Are you gonna take him out or something?” Matthew grabs his arm, shaking it, “I think the gift idea is so cute! And so gay! Ricky’s going to love it as long as you don’t suddenly act super strange again! I’m the biggest Rickvin shipper in the room, ‘kay?”

Hanbin smiles indulgently at him. Hao takes a deep breath. Gyuvin doesn’t notice Matthew’s boyfriend since he’s preoccupied with finding his own.

“I was thinking,” Gyuvin begins slowly, “Lotte World. On his birthday. They’ve got some fireworks display that night too, so we can watch the fireworks together and… maybe something will happen.”

“Maybe you will kiss,” Matthew remarks distantly, “That’s so romantic! I used to dream of first kisses under fireworks and a night sky.”

“Mm,” Hanbin hums, taking his hand, “I’ll bring you to stargaze during the break.”

Hao scrunches his nose up, “Disregarding that display of disgusting affection, what date are you bringing him?”

“His birthday,” Gyuvin raises an eyebrow, “Obviously.”

“Oh dear, Hanbin’s sister has a competition on that day, so we’re going to support,” Matthew purses his lips, “We won’t be free then. Hao?”

“Why do I need to be there?” 

“In case everything goes wrong so I can have both moral support and an excuse to suddenly break away and come hang by you the rest of the day,” Gyuvin grins, “You can bring Keita-hyung if you want.”

“I am not bringing Keita!”

“Aww,” Hanbin makes kissy faces at Hao (something, Matthew realises, his friends all like to do), “Is wittle baby Haohao shy?”

Following in Matthew’s footsteps, Hao reaches over and gives Hanbin’s thigh a hard pinch, “I’ll bring Ollie. He’ll love it.”

“Okay, if I text you ‘teenage mutant ninja turtles’, that’s you and Ollie’s cue to jump out of the shadows and come rescue me.”

“I hate that codeword,” Hao groans, “Fine.”

“Take lots of photos,” Matthew smiles, “Wish I were there. Don’t be strange, Gyuvin, and you’ll do fine.”

“I will be normal and not call him fucking stupid,” Hao puts his hands together, “Say it with me, Gyuvin. I will be normal and not call him fucking stupid. I will be normal and not call him fucking stupid.”

“Now I’m really excited,” Gyuvin drags his fingers down his cheeks, “I can’t help thinking something might happen.”

“And it might,” Hanbin looks at Matthew, “Sometimes you’ve got to be confident and take the first step. Else nothing will happen.”

Hao’s eyes run up and down Hanbin and Matthew, “You got together because I locked you in a malfunctioning bathroom, not because you were good at communication. Now Gyuvin, he is going to get Ricky because he has planned this out, is sincere, confident, and–”

“Has W rizz,” Gyuvin injects into the conversation, “I am in my W rizz era.”

“Never say that again,” Hao side-eyes him, “Now you go get your boy and I will… find a way to make Quanrui more tolerable for 10 hours.”

–

On the day of their break, Gyuvin sidles up to Ricky while waiting for the bus to bring them back to the Yuehua dorms, bumping his shoulder gently, “So, it’s your birthday soon.”

Ricky flutters his eyelashes at Gyuvin, “Ooh, yes, it is. Are you going to be the sugar daddy I always dreamed of?”

“Don’t be fucking stupid,” Gyuvin elbows him, quickly clamping a hand over his own mouth as he sees Hao’s glare at his word choice, “Ah, I meant. Don’t be ridiculous.”

“You know, I’m really fine with you calling me fucking stupid,” Ricky shrugs, hauling his luggage up the steps of the bus, “It’s not as if every time you tell me that I go and cry under the sheets for five hours.”

“That sounds suspiciously specific,” Gyuvin passes Ricky’s other bag to him, “Almost as if it’s real.”

“Oh dear,” Ricky feigns a gasp, “Looks like someone will just have to be especially nice to me so I don’t start crying again!”

Panting, Gyuvin drags his too-full luggage up to join them on the bus, “Have you got any plans for tomorrow yet?”

“Oh? No, I haven’t,” Ricky trails off awkwardly, “This is going to sound terrible but I thought we’d be spending my birthday together. Unless you’re busy or something, which I totally understand!”

Gyuvin shot him a funny look, “As a matter of fact, we are spending your birthday together. I bought us tickets to Lotte World! There’s going to be a fireworks display tomorrow night too, so I thought it’d be a good day for us to go.”

“That’s more like it,” Ricky gives him a satisfied smile, “I love fireworks.”

“I know,” Gyuvin beams, “Isn’t it a great idea?”

“Better than the water,” his best friend mumbles.

Offended, Gyuvin scoffs, “It’s not as if you haven’t done stupid shit for the people you like before!”

Ricky is rummaging in his bag for a phone charger, but looks up at that, “That’s not the same. I liked them when I did that. You don’t like me .”

Gyuvin laughs, a little guilty, a little awkward. Ah, if only he knew.

Oblivious to Gyuvin’s sudden stiffness, Ricky casts a glance at the tickets that Gyuvin’s holding in his hand, “Who are we going with?”

“Nobody,” Gyuvin eyes him carefully, “It’s a date.”

“Yeah right it is,” Ricky cranes his neck, “Why are there four tickets then? Hanbin-hyung? Hao-hyung?”

“Oh,” Gyuvin scrambles to find a good explanation for Hao and Ollie’s tickets he’d accidentally taken out, and fails dismally. Thankfully, Hao—who’s sitting behind him—comes to his rescue, “I thought I heard you say you’re giving them to your cousin. Isn’t it her birthday coming up soon?”

“You’re right,” Gyuvin nods quickly, “They’re not dated anyway. I completely forgot about my cousin. Thanks, Hao-ge.”

“I thought your parents didn’t like that branch of the family and so you don’t talk anymore,” Ricky frowns, “Am I thinking of the wrong cousin?”

Well, Ricky was in fact thinking of the wrong cousin, but it’s not like the right cousin actually exists in real life, so Gyuvin has no choice but to weave himself a little further into the rapidly forming web of elaborate lies, “But we decided that whatever beef our parents have shouldn’t carry into the next generation, so we’re pretty fine.”

The bus screeches to a stop, sending an ill-prepared Gyuvin flying into the front seat. He hits something hard instead of the back of the cushioned seat, though, and opens his eyes to see his forehead had crashed right into the middle of Ricky’s hand.

“Oops,” Ricky withdraws his hand sheepishly, “I thought that would be able to reduce the impact.”

“I am pretty sure the impact was increased, but I appreciate the gesture,” Gyuvin rearranges his shirt, ensuring everything is in place, “Can we meet at 9 tomorrow below the dorms? Like get ready by 9?”

Ricky snorts, “You mean 9.30? I have genuinely never seen you on time for even a single outing.”

Gyuvin whacks him over the head with a folded umbrella, “Tomorrow is a special day. Your birthday!”

“Yeah, it was cute when we celebrated it today too.”

They wouldn’t all make plans to meet up during the break, so some of Ricky’s closer friends and teammates had decided to throw him a small party before they left Planet Camp, with candles, cakes and party hats. Nothing special, but even the conventionality of it all warmed Ricky’s heart.

“Tomorrow you’ll be just as old as me,” Gyuvin whispers, “How time flies.”

Ricky puts his hands into his pockets, leaning against a wall while waiting for Hao to find the spare key they’d placed under the welcome mat, “And soon we’ll be graduating high school, and we’ll be debuting in Boys Planet, and we’ll have left all this behind. All the camaraderie and little snippets of life in the dorms.” 

Gyuvin sighs, not having expected him to suddenly get emotional over goodbyes, “But our future is still so bright.”

Ricky smiles a little sadly, “I hate goodbyes.”

Gyuvin pats his back, “It’s an unavoidable part of life. You’ll only be sad if you enjoyed your time there, see. And regardless of what happens, wasn’t Boys Planet a really good experience for all of us?”

“It made my mental health want to throw me off a cliff.”

Gyuvin snorts. He can’t come up with anything that can effectively rebut that statement, so he keeps his mouth shut about the unfairness of the whole survival show because he can spy a little camera sticking out of a bush on the left of the house and doesn’t want to reveal Mnet’s dirty secrets to the world lest he get evil edited and sued. 

— (6) matthew has nothing to do with this chapter

Gyuvin is determined to not be late this time. He’d gotten up at 8, brushed his teeth, did his hair, and even woke Hao up at 8.15 for wardrobe advice. Hao hadn’t been very happy with him, but he’s currently seated in the middle of Gyuvin’s bed, hugging a pillow and squinting at Gyuvin’s closet with messy hair and bleary eyes.

All in all, Gyuvin thinks it was an absolute win.

“Put that back,” Hao yawns, pointing at a particularly fluorescent green jacket, “I will not allow you to set foot out of the building wearing something that ugly.”

“I think it’s individualistic,” Gyuvin holds it up against himself, “Actually, nevermind.”

Hao picks up a yellow shirt that Gyuvin had earlier thrown onto the bed, flinging it back into Gyuvin’s arms, “Try this one. It’s cute.”

He blinks, “This is as fluorescent as the green jacket.”

“No,” Hao rubs his eyes, “This is bright yellow, not highlighter yellow. This is individualistic. That jacket was just ugly.”

“I’ve never worn this shirt before, you know,” Gyuvin takes a better look at it, “I wasn’t the one who bought it.”

“Who, then?”

“Ricky,” Gyuvin smiles slightly, “For Christmas last year.”

“And you’ve never worn it,” Hao arches an eyebrow, “All the more you should wear it when going out with him, right? To show him that you’re appreciative of his gifts? No wonder you’re fucking single.”

Gyuvin pulls the shirt over his head, turning to give Hao a better look at it.

“Looks fine to me,” Hao jerks his head over at the door, “And shoes?”

Gyuvin grins sheepishly, “I have one pair of shoes. So… my converse?”

“Your converse is red.”

Gyuvin nods, confused.

“Your shirt is yellow ,” Hao glares at him, more awake now, “Ugh. Wear my sneakers instead.”

“Oh,” Gyuvin blinks, surprised, “The one you banned me from borrowing?”

Hao sighs, “Yes, that one. Take good care of them, okay? If I see so much as a speck of mud on them, I’m going to smash my violin over your head.”

“The ten thousand dollar one?”

“I bet it would splinter finely,” Hao smiles dangerously, “Now fuck off. I’m going to wake Tianyue up.”

–

When Gyuvin finds his way down, Ricky’s already there, leaning against the wall in his black varsity jacket. Looking up from his phone as he hears Gyuvin, his face splits into a smile, “You’re early.”

“Happy birthday, Ricky,” Gyuvin claps him on the back, “I hope in this new year you find a boyfriend.”

“Argh, I hope so too. The issue isn’t even that I’m not meeting any new guys, but that everyone in Planet Camp is like 20,” Ricky sighs, “At least I have you, I guess, but it’s–”

“Not the same, I know,” Gyuvin finishes his sentence for him, “Have you ever been to Lotte World?”

“Yeah,” Ricky gives him a strange look, “You haven’t?”

“Well, nobody's brought me because I'm not as lucky as you,” Gyuvin raises an eyebrow, “Don't have a friend as good as me! I want to try the roller coasters.”

“There’s this one ride where everyone sits on this disc and we fly out over the lake,” Ricky grins, “Unless you’re scared of heights?”

“ Me ?” Gyuvin scoffs, “Impossible.”

–

In Gyuvin’s defense, he really isn’t scared of heights. He does, to some extent, experience motion sickness though, which is why Ricky is currently holding his bag outside the toilet cubicle while he throws his organs up.

“Gyuvin, why would you do this to yourself?” Ricky sighs, “This is our first ride of the day.”

Feeling a little better now that he’s thrown up, Gyuvin straightens up, “I’m fine with roller coasters! Let’s just please not take any other ride that involves me physically spinning around.”

“Oh, you think?”

Gyuvin’s phone vibrates with a text from Hao. 

ZHANG HAO

| why did you go to the toilet together…

| is everything ok

| ollie says hi

i’m fine  |

i just threw up because i'm bad with motion  |

|  you stupid idiot

| bring him to the indoor hot air balloon

Gyuvin swings the cubicle door open, hoping he looks better than he feels, “Why don’t we head to the indoor hot air balloon ride? You know, the one where the top of the hot air balloon is attached to the ceiling and it takes like half an hour to go one round and it looks really cute?”

Ricky narrows his eyes, “Why don’t you wash your hands, you stinky little shit?”

Splashing water from the tap onto Ricky, Gyuvin sniffs, “Thanks for your concern, Ricky. I really appreciate it.”

“I was so worried !” 

Fair enough, Gyuvin supposes. Ricky had looked worried sick when Gyuvin had stumbled and crashed into his arms the moment he got off the ride, and had held him up as he rushed Gyuvin to the bathroom. Whether it was because Ricky was worried about him or worried about him throwing up on his favourite jacket, Gyuvin wasn’t sure.

“Awhhh, because you love me?” He bumps Ricky’s shoulder jokingly, taking his bag back.

The other boy side-eyes him, “Sure…”

Yeah, maybe as a best friend. Not that Gyuvin was content with that, but it would have to do for the remaining five hours until Gyuvin figures something out when the park closes, because he’s determined to come up with some semblance of a plan by the fireworks display. 

–

Ricky says the hot air balloon ride was one of the most popular in Lotte World, so Gyuvin isn’t surprised when he sees a queue. He isn’t surprised either (but definitely disappointed) when he spots Hao and Ricky walking over, badly concealed by huge purple umbrellas opened in front of them.

Cringing, he pinches his nose bridge, choosing to look at the much more pleasant sight of Ricky’s face.

The other notices them too, given that they’re not very inconspicuous, gaping at them as he comments, “What the hell are they doing?”

Usually, Gyuvin would say it’s rude to stare, but even he can’t help but marvel at the stupidity of the situation. He’d expected more from Hao, “The ones with the umbrellas?”

“I mean, yes,” Ricky squints, “Who the fuck would bring yellow and purple polka dotted umbrellas to an indoor amusement park?”

Gyuvin forces a grin, “Maybe they forgot to close them when they came back in?”

“The one on the left kind of looks like Hao-hyung,” Ricky shakes his head, “Nah, I must be imagining things. Hao-hyung wouldn’t bring something so ugly and do something so stupid.”

Silently, Gyuvin agrees, but can’t help adding that if Ollie was involved, that wouldn’t be the case anymore. As evidently demonstrated by the present scenario.

After a while, Ricky points at a nearby store, “I’m going to go get something.”

Gyuvin nods absentmindedly, not thinking much of it, but when Ricky came back with sour candy for him because he was worried Gyuvin was still feeling poorly because of the earlier unpleasant experience with motion sickness…

Ugh, Gyuvin wants to plant kisses all over his face.

Ricky would probably not enjoy that, though, so Gyuvin shuts that thought down, choosing instead to clamp his hands over his mouth, “For me? Oh, Quanrui, you’re so sweet, I can’t believe you haven’t gotten a boyfriend yet…”

Ricky looks a little bashful, tugging on his ear, “Well, I was worried about you.”

After taking some time to think, Ricky speaks again, “Why are you so anxious to marry me off? It’s almost as if you hate me.”

Gyuvin’s eyes widen, “No! Not at all! I would hate for you to find a boyfriend! You’re my baby, you have to stay with me forever and ever–” Gyuvin cuts himself off, finding a more direct way to express his feelings, “Maybe I can be your boyfriend, since you treat me so well anyway.”

Ricky gapes at him slowly, “I will… throw you off a cliff.”

“But we would be so good together,” Gyuvin finds some confidence, pushing, “We could literally rule the world.”

He finds some comfort in the fact that Ricky isn’t rejecting him outright, choosing instead to respond, “Hao-ge would hate that.”

The spark of confidence vanishes before Gyuvin can say anything else that would expose himself. Thankfully, they’ve reached the front of the queue, and as Ricky keeps his phone in his bag, Gyuvin turns around to meet Ollie’s eyes.

Ollie waves his phone at him, so Gyuvin does another quick check before he gets on the ride.

LIU TIANYUE

| he is so sweet

| u go girl

| cant believe you almost confessed GOOD LUCK his ears are red

| maybe he likes you

| that’s from hao-ge

Gyuvin looks over again, giving Ollie a tiny shake of his head before Ricky grabs his hand and pulls him onto the ride, taking a seat in the cramped mini hot air balloon.

Peering over Gyuvin’s shoulder, Ricky’s staring at the hot air balloon behind them, which Gyuvin vaguely registers is Hao and Ollie. The minute they notice Ricky, they duck down, holding their umbrellas neatly above the opening and blocking themselves completely.

He wants to laugh and cry at the same time. This date is more stressful with the older two, not less .

To distract Ricky, Gyuvin blurts out, “I like someone.”

He knows Ricky well enough to anticipate his next move, so he holds a hand up to block Ricky from lunging into his lap in excitement, “Who? Do I know them?”

Gyuvin grits his teeth, trying to decide if he should make someone up. But after all, he did intend to confess at some point, so he nods, “Yeah. Rather well.”

“Who is it?”

“Guess.”

“Is it Gunwook?” Ricky looks mildly disgusted, “He could snap you in half.”

“ No ,” Gyuvin shakes his head, “Try harder.”

“ZHANG HAO??” Ricky’s expression is almost feral, “Please say no.”

“ NO! Why the fuck would you suggest that?”

“Who else?” Ricky leans in closer, until Gyuvin can feel his body heat. The latter tries his best not to blush at the proximity, fighting to keep his voice stable, “He’s younger than me?”

“Takuto?”

Gyuvin rolls his eyes, “No, that’s creepy. I’ll tell you when you guess it.”

“I’ve already guessed everyone! Just tell me,” Ricky shakes his arm, “Please?”

For one terrifying second, Gyuvin contemplates just confessing there and then, but he also really wants to watch the fireworks with Ricky and not Hao. 

“I can’t tell you unless you guess,” he raises an eyebrow, “Skill issue.”

–

It’s a tiring day afterwards, filled with bickering (Gyuvin), sweet little moves like helping Gyuvin hold the door (Ricky) and stalking the two of them (Hao and Ollie). Sometime after dinner, Gyuvin figures it’s time to go find a spot to stand for the fireworks.

He’s also made up his mind to confess during the fireworks. After all, he doubts Ricky’s going to suddenly hate him because of the confession, and he just needs to plant the idea of them dating in Ricky’s mind, then who knows? Maybe it could develop in a direction he wants it to. Even if he does get rejected, at least he can move on and this can just become a fond memory years down the road (not that Gyuvin wants this to happen, but today he actually has a plan B).

As the time nears, Gyuvin finds himself shaking more and more: it started with his leg while they were eating, then his hands as they began walking, and now that they’ve found a spot by the level two railings, his voice. 

“Why are you shaking,” Ricky says it as a statement, “You’re making me nervous, and this is supposed to be a relaxing day.”

“I am relaxed,” Gyuvin lies through his teeth, “Just a little cold.”

Wordlessly, Ricky offers his jacket, but is waved away by Gyuvin, “Nevermind, I’m not cold.”

“You are so strange,” Ricky narrows his eyes, “What are you so scared about? Confessing? To me, perhaps?”

Ah, if only you knew. Gyuvin gulps, lying again, “No… I’m nervous about the upcoming eliminations. I think I’m a filler pick.”

It’s break, and they shouldn’t be talking about it, but it’s the best excuse Gyuvin can come up with. Sure enough, Ricky’s expression softens, “Oh, Gyuvin… you’ll be fine. Let’s not talk about Boys Planet now, we’ve only got a fortnight of break.”

Hao catches Gyuvin’s eye from somewhere in the crowd, gesturing for Gyuvin to check his phone. He ignores Hao—he’s got no time, and he’s really trying his best to psych himself up for the confession. Gyuvin feels a little bad for lying to Ricky, but the fireworks were starting in ten minutes and Gyuvin has a very bad inkling that this will be the last ten minutes of his short, short life. 

The next ten minutes pass way too quickly in lighthearted banter and interesting gossip about the latest Yuehua trainee who accidentally left a permanent scorch mark on the wall of the practice room. 

Gyuvin is pretty sure that story wasn’t recent and Wang Yibo had been the one to scorch the practice room, but the starting of the display stops him from speaking.

Ricky’s face is tilted upwards so he can get a better look at the fireworks. He loves them, Gyuvin knows, the exact reason he decided to bring Ricky here , today . Under the night sky, the fireworks illuminate the other boy’s gentle smile, flattering his side profile in ways Gyuvin had never imagined before.

He is so beautiful.

Grasping at the threads of courage and sending a quick prayer to whichever god was watching their love story, Gyuvin taps on his best friend’s (not for long, he hopes!) shoulder, speaking loudly to be heard over the fireworks.

Ricky turns, still leaning on the railing, and Gyuvin nearly gets too distracted by his face to talk again, “I have something to tell you.”

“Now?” Ricky shouts over the din, “What is it?”

Gyuvin decides Ricky needs to actually be aware and conscious of what he’s going to say next, so he pushes himself nearer to Ricky, and all up in his face, he says, “I like you.”

Ricky doesn’t hear him, “WHAT?”

“I SAID,” Gyuvin repeats, determinedly staring into his eyes, “I LIKE YOU.”

Ricky’s eyelashes flutter as he tries to decide if he’s heard correctly. Evidently, he can’t come to a decision, so he finishes mildly—no, lamely —, “Oh. I–”

Gyuvin doesn’t give him the chance to finish. God knows they read romance novels together. God knows they recommend each other romance novels the other never reads. And god knows they are both hopeless romantics who dream of kissing under fireworks as the world spins around them and time slows down.

Gyuvin has no idea what else god knows, but he knows that he has been dreaming of kissing Ricky for a very long time. When they were both lying sick in bed before the Signal Song Test. When the fiasco in the training room happened. When the fiasco with the water happened. Now, because there’s no time like the present. 

So Ricky, obviously, doesn’t get a chance to finish, because whatever he’s about to say next disappears in their kiss.

To Gyuvin’s absolute (but not unpleasant) surprise, Ricky actually returns the kiss instead of pushing him away, hands coming up to hold him delicately, fingers fluttering, as if he doesn’t know what to do—as if anything he did was imperfect in Gyuvin’s eyes, really—and slowly finds a rhythm for the two of them.

He doesn’t know how to describe it, but somehow this all feels right. The fireworks, kissing Ricky, Ollie’s “Oh, hell” in the background… Even if Ricky hasn’t given him a response, Gyuvin just wants to enjoy the present moment.

Ricky breaks the kiss first, breathing heavily as he catches his breath, cheeks flushed. He looks so breathtaking that Gyuvin wants to swoop in and meet his lips again, craving the physical contact, but he doesn’t even need to make the first move.

The other boy leans forward again, then stops, a few centimeters away from Gyuvin’s face. Cruel, really, so Gyuvin could see the expression on his face change from shocked happiness to horror.

“Wait–” He tries to salvage however much of the already broken moment he can, but Ricky’s faster than that.

Ricky pushes back against Gyuvin’s shoulders, shaking his head violently, “No, I– I– I’m sorry, Gyuvin. I can’t– I’m sorry.”

“Hold on, Ricky,” Gyuvin reaches out for his wrist, but Ricky twists his arm easily, escaping Gyuvin’s grasp.

“I’ve– I’ve gotta go,” Ricky doesn’t meet Gyuvin’s eyes as he pushes past him, fleeing into the crowd.

Gyuvin looks on as Ricky disappears slowly, suddenly acutely aware that the firework display has stopped. It’s just him and a slowly dissipating crowd now, under the smoky night sky of Lotte World.

Distantly, he registers Hao and Ollie approaching him. 

“Um,” Hao begins intelligently.

“Well,” Ollie takes over, less sensitively, “I really thought it was all going to be fine when he started kissing you back.”

Hao kicks Ollie’s shin, “What we’re saying is–”

Gyuvin bites his lip, “I think I fucked up again. What do I do?”

Even Ollie has no proper response to that, apparently, as he shrugs silently.

–

It’s not as if Ricky is shocked about the confession.

He kind of had an idea since Gyuvin made him guess who he liked and refused to tell him the answer, since that wasn’t something you did unless you were talking to the person you liked. Combined with how strangely Gyuvin’s been acting the past few days, it all makes sense.

He’s not even shocked that Gyuvin kissed him, really.

But he kissed Gyuvin back . Of his own accord . And he enjoyed it.

Ricky stops walking in front of the viking ship, sinking down onto a bench. Earlier, he had almost been completely sure he didn’t like Gyuvin, but when Gyuvin kissed him, it felt so warm and comforting and familiar and foreign . Now, he’s less sure about his feelings. He… doesn’t think he likes Gyuvin, but the fact remains that he kissed Gyuvin back and thoroughly enjoyed the experience.

And he tried to initiate a second kiss. Ricky sighs, burying his head in his hands. He’s confused, a little scared—who knows how this will affect their relationship—and most certainly lost. Not just regarding his own feelings, but he has no idea how to get home from Lotte World. 

Closing his eyes and trying to visualise the path they’d taken to enter in the morning, all he can remember is Gyuvin. Gyuvin throwing up after their first ride, his slightly shy smile as Ricky tried to guess his crush, him shouting in Ricky’s ear so he could confess above the fireworks, him kissing Ricky–

The weather isn’t very cold, but Ricky shivers slightly. 

Pulling out his phone with shaking hands, he dials a number.

“Quanrui?” Sung Hanbin sounds happy, glowing, almost, and Ricky vaguely hears him bid goodbye to Matthew on the other side of the phone, “What’s up?”

“Hyung,” Ricky sniffs, voice cracking, “Can you pick me up from Lotte World? I think… I might need to talk to someone.”

“Oh,” Hanbin’s tone turns serious, “Okay, I’ll be there in five. Stay at the entrance where I can see you, okay?”

“Mm,” Ricky laughs humourlessly as he touches a hand to his cheek. It comes away wet. It’s so pathetic, really, that he should be crying in the middle of a theme park on his birthday, after he was kissed , and he loved it , but he was the one who had run away . 

A pause on Hanbin’s side. Then, “Oh, Ricky, please don’t cry.”

Rubbing his eyes furiously, Ricky croaks back, “I’m not.”

Hanbin hums.

–

Hanbin’s tapping his fingers on the steering wheel when Ricky ducks into the car, praying it’s dark enough that his puffy eyes aren’t obvious. 

To his dismay, Hanbin isn’t stupid.

“So,” Hanbin doesn’t look at him, “I take it the date didn’t go well.”

“How do you know?”

The elder swerves into a nearby parking lot, then turns to look at him in earnest, “It’s easier to talk like this. How do you think I know?”

“Gyuvin told you?”

“Told me?” Hanbin narrows his eyes, “He really likes you, you know. There was a whole plan going on with Matthew and Hao.”

“And Ollie,” Ricky recalls, “I thought I heard his voice a couple of times today. Wait, so Gyuvin orchestrated this whole thing?”

“Poor word choice,” Hanbin chides, “He planned it.”

“Whatever, hyung,” Ricky mumbles, “I’m so confused. I want to cry.”

Hanbin spreads his arms, “Cry, then. It’s just me.” He crosses his legs, careful not to hit the steering wheel, “What happened? You fought?”

Ricky shakes his head, “Far from that.”

His companion waits patiently for him with a quizzical tilt of his head as Ricky struggles to verbalise the day’s events, “We kissed.”

Hanbin jerks back so suddenly he hits the window, eyes widened, “You what ?”

Ricky cringes, “More accurately, he kissed me. Then I kissed him back.”

As it seems, he’s rendered Hanbin wordless. Hanbin looks like he’s weighing his options on what to say next, then finally settles on (what Ricky thinks) is one of the most unimportant focal points of the story.

“How was it?”

He shrugs, but answers honestly, “It was… nice. His lips were really soft.”

“So you like him,” Hanbin says, decisively, “I didn’t see that coming. So what’s the issue? You kissed, he likes you, you like him. Kiss again, then?”

Ricky cringes even harder, “Then I tried to kiss him a second time.”

Hanbin nods encouragingly.

Ricky closes his eyes, “Then I pushed him away and fled.”

“ Why ?”

“I don’t know if I like him, hyung!” 

Ricky doesn’t know if he looks stupid in Hanbin’s eyes now. I mean, generally you only kissed someone back if you liked them, and if you didn’t, then you wouldn’t try to kiss them again. He’s a little fearful of what Hanbin’s going to say next, but Sung Hanbin is Sung Hanbin, after all, so he just places a comforting hand on Ricky’s arm.

“I can’t answer that for you, Ricky-ah.”

“How did you find out you liked Matthew-hyung?”

Hanbin’s lips curve upwards, forming the subconscious expression that he makes every time he’s obviously thinking about Matthew, “He was just so perfect. He’d do all sorts of nice things for me, and he’d be there for me when I was upset, and we hung out every day, trained together, ate together, slept together…”

Ricky raises his eyebrows at the last part, but is too occupied with sorting out the mess in his heart than teasing Hanbin for a successful relationship. Contemplatively, he looks up, “You were best friends too.”

“Mm,” Hanbin acknowledges, “But every story is different, and what you experience will not be the same as mine.”

“I don’t know how I feel,” Ricky says quietly, “I don’t know if I like him. Or if I’m now pressured to like him, since I kissed him back.”

“I’m sure Gyuvin won’t pressure you to like him back on that basis, so don’t sweat it,” Hanbin squeezes his arm, “You don’t want to lose this friendship over a little kiss, right?”

“I don’t want to lose this friendship more than anything,” Ricky whispers, feeling the tears rise up again. He blinks them back, “But I’m scared he’ll be mad at me. Because I pushed him away and ran.”

Hanbin nods, “I think what you do from now on is your own choice. But I hope you’ll take into consideration what he wants, and more importantly, what you want for yourself as well. You don’t think of yourself quite enough.”

Ricky feels miserable, “I don’t know.”

“You don’t have to,” Hanbin revs up the engine again, ready to send Ricky home, “Know that I’m always your staunch supporter, though.”

“Thanks, hyung. For everything.”

“It’s no trouble at all,” Hanbin murmurs.

–

“Let’s go back,” Gyuvin says, scarily calm, “It’s getting late.”

Behind him, Hao and Ollie exchange a worried look. Ollie clears his throat, “Ricky…?”

Gyuvin’s still staring into the distance, so Hao responds, trying to keep a conversation going, “Hanbin’s got him. He’s fine.”

“He didn’t wait for us?” Gyuvin turns, meeting Hao’s eyes.

“Um, I think it might be a little awkward if we had to take a 40 minute cab ride home together,” Hao points out, waving a hand, “Considering everything, you know.”

“I do ,” Gyuvin quickens his pace, “Let’s just. I need to lie down in my bed and digest all this. I can’t do this now.”

Hao looks at Ollie for help. The latter just shrugs, “Alright, then. Home it is.”

Hao’s never been this happy that the dorms for the Korean and Chinese trainees are separate, because it would really be rather awkward for the kids to be spending the next week together in cramped quarters before they return to be locked up in Planet Camp. Not that the dorms there were much better, but at least Gyuvin and Ricky were on opposite sides of the building. 

— (07) matthew dances to boombayah in a sparkly purple suit

Matthew doesn’t really know how it happened.

He’d gone home to Canada for the break, not disappeared off the face of the Earth, so when he returns to Planet Camp and Ricky and Gyuvin are suddenly not talking , he feels like he’s missed a whole chapter. That he shouldn’t have missed, because he was one text message away .

“Zhang Hao,” he grins dangerously, gripping Hao’s shoulder, “ Hyung , what’s this I hear about Gyuvin and Ricky not speaking at all?”

“Ah,” Hao tries to shake him off, “It’s a long story! Why don’t we go find Hanbin and then he can fill you in–”

Matthew hesitates. It’s even more Hanbin’s fault than Hao’s, actually, since he talked to Hanbin every day over the break and there wasn’t even a singular mention of this. Loosening his grip (but not by much), his smile widens, “Lead the way.”

“Hanbin-ah,” Hao calls as he steps into the room, in a voice far too high-pitched to be normal, “Hanbin-ah! It’s so good to see you again!”

Hanbin looks up at him strangely, “We had lunch together yesterday.”

Lunging at him, Hao hisses, “Did you not tell Matthew about the thing ?”

Eyes widening, Hanbin looks between Matthew and Hao with horror, “ No , fuck, I forgot.”

“I am right here,” Matthew smiles sweetly, taking Hanbin’s hand, “So we called for hours every single night and you didn’t even think to tell me the juiciest piece of gossip I’ve heard in years?”

“You didn’t ask,” Hanbin squeaks out, “So I thought you forgot.”

“Hm?”

“I’M SORRY,” Hanbin gasps, “I mean, I forgot. I’m so sorry, darling, I’ll tell you everything right now, I love you–”

Matthew rocks back on his heels, satisfied, “Better.”

Hao side eyes the two of them, “Ah, my dad was so scared of my mom as well.”

Before they can fill Matthew in on the events of the break, the door creaks. Ricky walks in, alone, a strange sight considering Matthew’s never seen him and Gyuvin apart before. It does make the sharing of information slightly awkward, though, so Matthew backs slowly out of the room, waving at Ricky.

“Are you talking about me and Gyuvin?”

“Um,” Matthew responds articulately, “No…?”

“You don’t have to go anywhere, you know,” Ricky arches an eyebrow, “I can tell you about what happened.”

“The two of them know already?”

Hao shrugs, “I was there the whole time.”

Hanbin looks guilty, “Ricky told me. I picked him up after I sent you to the airport.”

“So he got Hao and Ricky to tail us to Lotte World with purple polka-dotted umbrellas,” Ricky begins, “Really ugly and absolutely obvious, but regardless.”

Hao cringes, “That was Ollie’s idea.”

Ricky ignores him, “Then we went on the first ride and Gyuvin threw up in the toilet. And we went on a hot air balloon thing where he made me guess who he liked and refused to tell me, so I kind of had a feeling that it may be me.”

Matthew nods.

“Then we went to watch the fireworks and he confessed.”

“That’s it?”

Hao clears his throat, a strangled sound that sounded suspiciously like he was trying to say something. Matthew can’t tell, though, so he looks at Ricky for clarification.

The younger boy sighs, “Then he kissed me.”

Hanbin clears his throat this time, and Ricky’s cheeks are flaming, “And then I kissed him back and tried to kiss him again but then something came over me and I pushed him away and ran into the night.”

“ Ran into the night ,” Matthew enunciates clearly, “How… dramatic. And now you don’t know if you like him?”

“I talked to Hanbin-hyung about this when he came to pick me up,” Ricky stands up, eyes determined, “I didn’t know back then, but now I do.”

Hao sniffs affectedly, “You’ve been thinking about it in your room for twelve days.”

“Touche,” Ricky grins, “I think I like him.”

“So… tell him?” Hanbin frowns, “Unless you want to do something as stupid as Gyuvin did. I don’t recommend that, though.”

“But I feel bad,” Ricky groans, “What if he’s hurt and sad because I pushed him away?”

“Oh, I’m sure he is,” Matthew grimaces, “But he won’t know any better unless you tell him that you like him.”

Hao’s beaming, “Oh, son, I’m so proud of you. You have no idea. I’m really seeing the maturity of thought here!”

“Is that sarcasm,” Ricky frowns, “Cause, like, I spent 12 days thinking about it. If I still didn’t know I’d be kind of dumb.”

Matthew, who spent years thinking about whether or not he liked Hanbin, chooses not to speak on the matter. 

“I also talked to a lot of people,” Ricky adds, “Then I realised that I already know the answer, I just want validation for it.”

“Wonderful,” Hanbin smiles at him, “So what are we going to do?”

“Hao-hyung,” the youngest’s eyes are glittering, “Did you bring your violin?”

“Yes…?”

“Can you play Boombayah on the violin?” 

“I could try,” Hao frowns, “What’s up?”

“Great!” Ricky smiles mysteriously, “You’ll know in a bit.”

–

Matthew wonders why he agreed to this as he pulls on a glittery jacket he doesn’t know why Ricky even owns. 

The confession plan that would get Gyuvin to forgive Ricky and get together with him, was apparently to borrow a speaker from Taerae to “amplify Hao’s violin music” (Matthew is unsure as to how specifically it will work), have Hao play a violin version of Boombayah by Blackpink, and have Matthew and Hanbin dance to the song next to Hao (Matthew is sure as to how specifically this will work, but he isn’t looking forward to it). Then Ricky would hold a mic and sing, emphasising on the “oppa” parts (Matthew wants to see this happen, but isn’t sure if he’s willing to pay the price), while Ollie and Yujin threw confetti from both sides of the “stage”! 

All this was to happen that exact night. At 10pm, under Gyuvin’s window (which Keita was in charge of getting Gyuvin to). 

Matthew wants to die . 

“I never thought I’d be playing Boombayah on my violin,” Hao says mournfully at his bow, dressed in a similarly glittery outfit.

“I never thought I’d be dancing to Blackpink under some 16 year old’s window at 10pm either,” Hanbin tugs on his pink pants, which Matthew really thinks makes him look dapper. 

Yujin and Ollie weren’t exempted from the glitter treatment either, so Ricky and Hanbin’s dorm is so bright Matthew can barely stand to look at it. They do look like they’re enjoying it though, Hao barely holding the two of them back from trying out their party poppers in the middle of the room. 

The bathroom door slams open, Ricky twirling as he enters the room holding a sparkling blue top hat in his hand, perfectly matching his sequined magician’s suit. He bows theatrically, “How do I look?”

Matthew and Hanbin gape at him. Hao covers his eyes. Yujin cheers.

“Dashing,” Ollie grins, “I’m sure Gyuvin will forgive you.”

“I’m not sure I will,” Matthew grits out, “Why the fuck am I doing this?”

A knock on the door.

“You guys ready?” Keita pops his head in, “Give me a signal when you’re all set up and I’ll get Gyuvin’s attention.”

“Yeah,” Hanbin glowers, “Not sure we’ll need a signal, though. Just look out the window at an entourage of glittery hats.”

Keita picks up a flowery red hat from the pile beneath his feet, placing it gently on Hao’s head, “Oh, you look great.”

To Matthew’s abject horror, Hao actually flushes . 

“Thanks,” Hao says softly, “I’m not sure where Ricky got these, actually.”

“Doesn’t matter. Fits you like a glove,” Keita smiles up at Hao again, then slips out of the room, “Good luck, Ricky!”

Ricky gives him a thumbs up, wondering aloud, “Was that a compliment or…”

“A budding romance,” Yujin flops onto the bed, “But a project for another day.”

“Nothing to see here,” Hao raises his voice, “Let’s go , shall we.”

Hanbin squeezes Matthew’s hand, “We really started something here, didn’t we?”

“Yeah,” Matthew smiles back, “Amazing how love is in the air.”

–

Keita’s hand dangling out of the window is an excellent sign telling them where Gyuvin’s room is. 

Breathing a deep sigh, Hao, still in the red hat, takes his violin out of its case and gets ready in the middle. Whatever he’d figured out (and Matthew and Hanbin had learnt) in two hours would be a disgrace to Blackpink’s name, and Matthew’s really thankful phones aren’t allowed in Planet Camp.

They’d probably be cancelled if a recording were to go online.

This was also Matthew’s first time dancing to Hao’s violin, so if he bumps into Hanbin a couple of times because Ricky keeps missing the beat and he’s getting really confused about which backing music (Hao or Ricky) he should be listening to, it’s not his fault. 

Ollie also pulls one of the party poppers a little too early, sending an unusually huge piece of confetti flying into Matthew’s mouth. He chokes, spitting it out and bumping into Hanbin again. 

By the last chorus, Matthew really wants to kill himself. As much as he’s confident in his dance skills, he hadn’t expected to have to catch Hanbin as his boyfriend tries to do Jennie’s part and jumps into his arms. 

He drops Hanbin. Hao’s violin wavers for a couple of seconds as he tries not to step on Hanbin’s head. 

When the song ends, confetti explodes over Matthew. He looks up at the window, which isn’t too far upwards since Gyuvin stays on the second floor, and slowly takes in Gyuvin’s expression. He looks mildly confused and extremely amused, which Matthew can’t blame him for. Imagine not talking to your best friend for two weeks after you kissed and suddenly he has a troupe of glittery musicians. 

Ricky puts the mic to his lips again, slightly breathless from all the singing, “KIM GYUVIN. I LIKE YOU TOO.”

Gyuvin’s face lights up, cupping his hands around his mouth, “WHAT IS THIS SUPPOSED TO BE?”

“I’M SERENADING YOU,” Ricky shouts back, mic so loud that Matthew winces, “I’M SORRY I PUSHED YOU AWAY BECAUSE I WAS CONFUSED. IT’S NOT THAT I SUDDENLY LIKE YOU, I JUST NEVER CONSIDERED THE POSSIBILITY. BUT NOW I’M REALLY GLAD I DID, BECAUSE–”

Hao snatches the mic from him, “Don’t scream .”

Ricky continues as if he was never stopped, “I REALLY APPRECIATE YOU BOTH AS A FRIEND AND MORE. THANK YOU FOR COMING INTO MY LIFE, GYUVIN.”

“DO NOT JUMP OUT OF THE WINDOW,” Keita shrieks from upstairs, “Maybe you should all come up.”

–

Keita looks frazzled when they arrive, a stark contrast to a glowing Gyuvin. He quickly ushers them back into Hanbin’s room as Ricky joins Gyuvin in his, “That was spectacular.”

“Legendary,” Ricky agrees, “10/10 would do again.”

“0/10 would not do again,” Hanbin rubs his back, “Matthew dropped me!”

“Did you not rehearse that part,” Gyuvin grins, “He looked so shocked when you jumped onto him.”

Matthew clears his throat, and Hanbin’s expression immediately shifts to one of apologetic guilt, “Oh, sorry, I shouldn't have jumped on you, dear. Please don’t be mad.”

“Forgiven,” Matthew sniffs, “I’m so glad that’s over.”

“It’s times like this I really regret coming on this show,” Hao sighs, “Not that I would’ve been able to avoid this, actually. Given all the time I spend with the Yuehua kids.”

“You have us to support you,” Keita shrugs, “I think it’s better this way.”

Hao looks pleasantly embarrassed again, “I’m glad I have you.”

Matthew looks at them over the clear rim of his glasses, nudging Hanbin, “Not another pair.”

“It’s okay,” Hanbin pats his hand, “They’re both in touch with their emotions.”

“That’s what I thought I was too.”

–

“So,” Ricky smiles at Gyuvin, still wearing the blue top hat, “What are we now?”

“I still can’t believe you ran away at Lotte World. I was thinking about it the entire week.”

“I’m sorry,” Ricky laughs, “I’m stupid.”

“You are,” Gyuvin punches him teasingly, then turns a little more serious, “So what are we?”

“S tier best friends?” 

“Really,” Gyuvin giggles, “I prefer boyfriends.”

“Fine with me,” Ricky can’t stop smiling, “And now…”

“Now is the part where you kiss me,” Gyuvin grins, confident and attractive and lovely, “To make up for your heinous crimes.”

“Oh, now is the part where I kiss you?” 

“Mhm.”

So Ricky does, and the rest is history.