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Kim Dokja thought of himself as a very patient constellation. Running a nebula, dealing with the Industrial Complex and generally having to put up with the constellations’ bullshit took its toll on him but he’d fared so far better than expected.
Some constellations ー like the usual quartet in his channel ー were better to deal with than most but, at the same time, they gave him the worst headaches.
The throbbing headache that was pulsating right now in his mind was all thanks to one specific angel, as he read the text in front of him.
[Sub Scenario - Star Stream’s Yaoi Off Competition]
Category: Sub
Difficulty: ???
Clear Conditions: Participate and win the Yaoi Off Competition.
Time Limit: 72 Hours
Compensation: 200,000 coins + a New Story
Failure: ???
[Participate as a couple of two men in the competition and gather votes to become the best yaoi couple in the Star Stream . The Incarnations and Constellations alike will vote on their favourite couple. Methods of voting will be listed below. ]
“Uriel…” Kim Dokja once again felt his already frail patience wearing increasingly thin. “What is this.”
[Constellation Demon-like Judge of Fire wishes for you to strengthen your companionship]
[Constellation Abyssal Black Flame Dragon cannot stop laughing]
[Constellation Secretive Plotter is observing curiously for your future actions]
[Constellation Prisoner of the Golden Headband roots for your swift victory]
The headache was just getting worse by this point. He knew already that Uriel must have pulled some strings and a lot of coins into asking for this specific kind of subscenario but he wasn’t aware she would go this far just for this.
“Uh, this competition is actually pretty serious,” Yoo Sangah commented from beside him, her head peeking on Han Soyooung’s shoulders as the two of them read the rules for it.
“I don’t care and I don’t want to know,” Kim Dokja made to turn, eyes and ears closed off to whatever shenanigans they were pulling now. Coins were tempting not
this
tempting. “I’m not joining.”
“I think it’s too late for you, now” Han Sooyoung snickered as she scrolled down the list of the participating couples. Kim Dokja stopped on his steps and felt a shiver running on his back.
“I thought the participation was optional…” he whispered, slowly turning to look at the evilish smirks of the two women.
“It is,” Yoo Sangah replied. “But some constellations can sponsor people into the competition.”
Kim Dokja had never opened up the scenario’s rules so fast as he did now, scrolling through the list of the competitors.
In hindsight, this was Uriel’s doing. He should have known better that there was no way he was not going to be dragged into.
Names familiar and unfamiliar scrolled in front of his eyes, until, blinking in stark white on the blue background of the scenario tab, the two names he had wanted to see the least ever.
Yoo Joonghyuk x Kim Dokja
[Constellation Demon-like Judge of Fire cheers for you and your dear companion]
The KimCom’s large living room in the Industrial Complex was buzzing as the rest of Kim Dokja’s nebula bounced words left and right.
Kim Dokja was sandwiched between Jung Heewon and Han Sooyoung on one of the couches, eyes closed as he very strongly tried to dissociate from all of this.
“Ahjussi deserve to win, they are the strongest!!” Lee Gilyoung piped up and Shin Yoosung nodded fervently beside him. Kim Dokja didn’t have the heart to tell him that strength wasn’t a factor in this competition.
“We need a plan.” Lee Jihye was sitting up the large table like a commander reviewing her war map, reading and rereading the rules. Kim Dokja wanted to ask if she’d ever studied like this for school before. “This says that each Incarnation and Constellation can throw one single vote in the ballot…”
“I see incarnations from North America and Japan as well here, so this competition must be global.” Jung Heewon pondered beside him.
Kim Dokja tuned out their conversation and tried to logically reason how he could safely survive this. They were serious about this but none of them cared about the real problem here: the competition involved two people and the other half of the team hadn’t shown up yet…
Yoo Joonghyuk had been out fighting hidden scenarios until now but he must have seen the sub scenario alert. It was just about time before he came back and killed Kim Dokja for this.
Well, if he died maybe he could be spared the humiliation and not participate… It was certainly an idea.
Like summoning the devil himself, silence fell in the living room as the protagonist appeared at the door. Yoo Joonghyuk swiped his eyes round the living room at the people before they landed on Kim Dokja, staring him down like he was always his fault. He shook his head slightly as if to convince him that he was innocent for once.
“What is going on?” He asked the people present while still staring at Kim Dokja.
“Master, welcome back! We are having a strategic meeting.”
Yoo Joonghyuk moved to look briefly at Lee Jihye before looking back at Kim Dokja, his deep set eyes hiding a slight confusion.
“Is it about the sub scenario? Why?”
“Well, idiot, because you and this other idiot here are running for this and we need you to win.” Han Sooyoung grinned. “We want a cut in the winning.”
Silence broke in the living room as their companions chatted on cut percentages for their winning but Kim Dokja still looked intently at Yoo Joonghyuk; he had opened up the scenario tab to read the rules, his brows furrowing while his eyes moved to read the rules. Kim Dokja didn’t need to use Omniscient Reader lvl. 2 to read his thoughts, the regressor was sometimes an open book to the reader.
It was the first time a scenario quest like this ever appeared ー it was the first time for Kim Dokja as well ー and the two of them never worked well with too little information.
But nothing could have prepared him for the words that came out of Yoo Joonghyuk’s mouth.
“What does… ‘yaoi couple’ mean?”
Kim Dokja moved faster than lightning as he covered Han Sooyoung’s mouth with his hand before she could spout something cursed; but he hadn’t imagined that the backstabbing would come from his own sword.
“It’s a japanese term to indicate a homosexual relationship between two men.” Jung Heewon replied candidly, as if they were simply talking about the weather. Kim Dokja turned back to look at her, his eyes glinting in barely concealed insanity.
“But Kim Dokja and I are not romantically involved.” The regressor continued, unfazed by the explanation. Kim Dokja felt the ground couldn’t swallow him faster, while Han Sooyoung was in tears, laughter muffled by Kim Dokja’s hand still on her mouth.
Not another word. He mouthed to Jung Heewon but it seemed the attack was coming from all fronts.
“It doesn’t matter,” Yoo Sangah smiled. “Yaoi couple might also involve people who are not actually together. It could also be two people who have a very strong chemistry.”
The worst betrayal truly came from people you trusted the most. Kim Dokja was planning on how to make a tyrannical takeover and fire all the employees present out of the Kim Dokja’s Company, when the last stabbing came from above.
[Constellation ‘Demon-like Judge of Fire’ explains that yaoi is a synonym for companionship]
[Constellation ‘Demon King of Salvation’ is furiously staring at constellation ‘Demon-like Judge of Fire’]
“Hm,” Yoo Joonghyuk closed down the scenario tab and stared down at Kim Dokja, his lips drawn into a thin serious line and eyes calm, as if he had finally taken the decision to put Kim Dokja out of his misery and he was only thinking on the logistics of it. He just hoped it would be quick if not painless.
“We are winning this.”
“WaitーWHAT?!” Kim Dokja exclaimed. “NO!”
Yoo Joonghyuk, the stubborn man, the regressor, the fucking asshole, didn’t even pay attention to Kim Dokja’s wailing and turned to an enthusiastic Lee Jihye. “Tell me the strategy.”
Han Sooyoung freed herself out of the muzzle, wheezing and gasping out of breath, laughing her ass off.
Kim Dokja simply hid his face in his hands and waited for the world to end him first.
What followed became a whirlwind of complete insanity. KimCom took it upon itself to continue this parade of deep humiliation, everyone organising to make posters and public announcements in the Industrial Complex to incite incarnations and constellations to vote for what was then called ーcourtesy of one very helpful Shin Yoosungー Joongdok.
Kim Dokja felt like the world had tilted upside down ー Star Stream and scenarios and constellations aside, those he could face and fight and plan and defy. But standing side by side with Yoo Joonghyuk as people called them ‘the best Yaoi ship in the Star Stream’? He feared Kim Dokja would have an iron deficiency for all the blood he was fueling up on his face and ears.
What confused him the most was Yoo Joonghyuk. He had taken the whole ordeal as calmly as possible, he listened to KimCom’s absurd planning on narrating their Life and Death Companions story and using it to promote them, and didn’t even blink when they talked about them as a couple.
Yoo Joonghyuk was really desperate for some coins, Kim Dokja thought. He had to admit, the coins were a lot and he was never one to refuse them and the new story could be a good one. It was a story from Eden for sure, at least he had assumed so.
But to the point of him taking all of this so calmly?
I have to ask him if he needs some coins, maybe I can help him.
On the other side, this brought a new type of feral energy into the constellations.
Uriel surely supported them ーwhile being the constellation who had promoted and prompted the whole sub scenario, she wasn’t ashamed of showing her bias.
Sun Wukong and Black Flame Dragon were going with the vibes, sometimes giving out pointers on sexy pictures they could take to spread around.
The Korean constellations were boasting around with pride about the most famous Korean couple in the world; even Persephone made a remark on wedding pictures.
Secretive Plotter was mostly silent, sometimes showing up to observe.
Kim Dokja could count on two hand the times he had asked Biyoo to close the channel in the past 36 hours, just because they were being too annoying.
Another day and half and this nightmare would be over and they could go back focusing on more important matters ー like maybe reaching the end of the scenario.
When the last 18 hours clocked in, a new dilemma appeared. ‘Joongdok’ had managed to gather many points to reach the final round, holding strong until now. But the North American participants were being stronger, to the point they had ammassed enough points for them to take the lead.
“How is it possible?!” Lee Jihye huffed and stomped on the ground. “Who the fuck are they??”
“They seem famous in USA… I have never heard of them before, they must have a strong support.” Lee Hyunsung patted on Lee Jihye’s shoulder in a unhelpful attempt to give her comfort.
“The problem is not them,” Han Sooyoung slurped on her lollipop and took it out of her lips with a small pop. “The problem is
him.
” She pointed at Kim Dokja with her lollipop.
Jang Hayoung wanted to rebuke her but but Jung Heewon stopped her and hummed for a second.
"I mean, she is not wrong.” she pondered. “Yoo Joonghyuk got a pretty solid reputation to help us gather votes but Dokja-ssi…” Jung Heewon sighed as she looked at their leader. “You have still a terrible reputation around.”
“What can I say,” Kim Dokja shrugged. “I live to disappoint.”
“I am going to disappoint you to Underworld and back, you useless piece of shit,” Han Sooyoung smacked him on his head. “We need to win.”
“But how?” Yoo Sangah was sitting beside the kids, overlooking the two of them making a collage for a new poster to display at the central plaza of the Industrial Complex. “What more can we do? Ask who to vote?”
Han Sooyoung plopped on the couch and hummed. “The constellations are the only ones left, they are a shit ton and surely many of them haven’t casted their vote yet.”
“Problems stand,” Lee Jihye continued. “Most constellations either don’t care or hate Ahjussi.”
[Constellation Demon-like Judge of Fire is sad to see their efforts go to waste]
[Constellation Demon-like Judge of Fire would like to ask if there is something she can do]
“Thank you Uriel, but at this point you have done enough… I don’t think you can–”
“Wait,” Han Sooyoung sat up again, biting on the lollipop nervously as she opened up again the voting results. The North Americans were still leading by a slowly increasing margin. They needed to come up with a plan and fast, before it was too late to catch up. “Maybe they can still help.”
Everyone else –including a now curious Kim Dokja– looked up to her, pending on her words.
“We have Jang Hayoung to help us contact the constellations, yes, but it’s our words and, as you said, they don’t give a shit about us. But they might listen to other constellations.”
Jung Heewon hummed. “You want us to use Uriel to spread the word around?”
“Not only Uriel, I want Eden to start telling people to vote us. I want those in Olympus who like us to do some work. I want Emperor. Didn’t the Americans defeated the Chinese couple last round? What if we join force?”
“And if they can’t be convinced, well… We still have a shit ton of coins to bribe them.”
“While I am not against voting fraud,” Kim Dokja interrupted her before she could start throwing coins around, “I am not going to give you coins so you could bribe constellations.”
Han Sooyoung just smacked him in the head again to silence him.
“So,” she grinned, already rolling down the list of constellations and incarnations they could bribe to their side. “Voter fraud operation?”
“Voter fraud operation,” everyone else –minus an annoyed Kim Dokja and a nowhere to be seen Yoo Joonghyuk– chanted back.
Kim Dokja left her to their own machinations and walked to go find the other man involved in this electoral rigging.
Yoo Joonghyuk was a man too stubborn to be pulled into doing other people’s pranks and games, so his behaviour bordered the mysterious. He hadn’t done more than just follow along the other’s plans. How many coins must he need for him to play along like this for the constellations’ amusement?
Kim Dokja’s feet took him to the usual pathway that led him to one of the few places Yoo Joonghyuk could be found in when not out fighting monsters. The training ground was spacious and well equipped but hidden enough by privy eyes, to make it the perfect place for Yoo Joonghyuk to train. Kim Dokja had found it the first day he had claimed the Industrial Complex and took it upon himself to furnish it – maybe he knew already that Yoo Joonghyuk would find it and took a liking to it.
Yoo Joonghyuk had most likely just finished his training when Kim Dokja found him, his large plain of his back and his muscles moving as Yoo Joonghyuk wore his black turtleneck. Kim Dokja hadn’t meant to stare his back so long – or at least, he hadn’t meant for Yoo Joonghyuk to find him staring. If people found him here staring, they might use it for their votings.
“Done training?” Kim Dokja asked before the other man could ask him what he was doing there.
Yoo Joonghyuk nodded as he latched his belts on and wore his black long coat.
Kim Dokja waited for him to be ready and walked again to where he had come from, feeling more than hearing, Yoo Joonghyuk following him right behind.
A few beeps sounded and the scenario tab opened up, announcing that new votes were flooding it: Han Sooyoung’s plan to start collecting votes must have been working.
Kim Dokja let out a deep sigh and closed down the tab, feeling a new headache coming over. He hadn’t heard Yoo Joonghyuk catching up to him but he felt his eyes boring at him when he walked beside him.
“What,” he asked, slowly rubbing his eyes.
Yoo Joonghyuk stopped in his steps and stared at him, his eyes dark and hiding an intense feeling that Kim Dokja couldn’t quite pinpoint.
“If you are not well, go rest. We need you in better form for the voting.” Yoo Joonghyuk ordered him around.
K
im Dokja felt his cheek spasming, biting down the growing annoyance.
“Fuck the votes, I can’t wait for this to be over.” Kim Dokja murmured but the ears of the regressor were sharper and he stepped closer, looming over him.
“What is your problem, we have to win.” he thundered, looking down on him. “Or are you already giving up?”
The asshole knew that he could easily bait him like that, they were people always moving in an unspoken competitiveness against one another. Kim Dokja had baited the other more than once like this and Yoo Joonghyuk had soon learned that two could play the game.
Not this time, though.
“I wish I could give up on this.” Kim Dokja whispered, feeling like each feeling of anxiety, distress, confusion he had been accumulating since the beginning of the competition, were turning into sharp nails stabbing in his brain and back.
Yoo Joonghyuk leaned slightly back, the dark expression cracking in confusion.
“Does it bother you?” Yoo Joonghyuk asked quietly, a sharp contrast to the earlier fury. “Does all of this bother you that much?”
Kim Dokja looked up to the taller man and felt for the first time in a long while, at complete loss of words. Yoo Joonghyuk was staring him down, pinning him on spot as his eyes bore into his souls. For a moment, Kim Dokja understood how must have felt like to have your souls and thoughts read and scrutinized by the Omniscient Reader’s skill.
“No… I mean, it doesn’t bother that much but…”
How could he easily explain that what it felt was embarrassing, yes, but on a level that he wasn’t ready to poke at.
“Well, why doesn’t bother you that much?” Kim Dokja wiggled away from the black pools of Yoo Joonghyuk’s eyes by quickly turning and putting two more steps of distance between them.
“Why should it bother me.”
Kim Dokja shook his head and his smile turned pitying. Really, was Yoo Joonghyuk as dumb as his skull was thick? “It should. Why would you ever want to enjoy going around telling people we are a couple?”
But Yoo Joonghyuk just stood there. Kim Dokja had been pitying until that moment, but feeling the other man’s eyes staring at him, he felt that maybe that same pity was being mirrored back to him.
It only lasted a second before pity turned into something close to bitterness.
“You fool,” he said as he walked past him and away. “You understand absolutely nothing.”
Kim Dokja asked not for the first time in the last 48 hours, what the hell was going on and why he felt like the world couldn’t stop tilting.
The hours passed and the votes started racking up faster and faster still. Whatever they have conjured up to gather this much attention was evidently working as the margin between two finalists was getting thinner by the hour.
Kim Dokja had refused to look at Yoo Joonghyuk since earlier, feeling like the regressor had become another sharp nail stabbing at his abdomen and making it bleed.
One hour and it was over, one hour and they could go back calling each other companion without any other implications the word might bring; one hour and they could go back to the safe distance Kim Dokja had drawn between the two of them and had tried to maintain since the beginning of the scenario. For the sake of both of them.
Or so he hoped.
Kim Dokja had been dissecting the last conversation he had with Yoo Joonghyuk and analyzing each and all the microexpressions Yoo Joonghyuk had shown him when several hands gripped him and shook him and people screamed at his ears.
He looked around in confusion at everyone’s happy faces, when he noticed the countdown to the sub scenario down to 0
51% votes for Yoo Joonghyuk x Kim Dokja. Joongdok had won the Best Yaoi Competition.
Wait, what.
Kim Dokja felt like sound and time continued to move in constantly different wavelengths, people screaming at his ears one second and then deafening silence the other, his heart beating like a gong in his chest. Wait, where was –
“We won,” Kim Dokja was gently made turn as Yoo Joonghyuk took him by his arms to look at him and whispered to him. The regressor had never looked at him so softly as he was looking at him now.
He belatedly realized no one had ever looked at him like this before.
“We won…” Kim Dokja whispered back, gulping down. “Happy to finally get some coins?”
Yoo Joonghyuk’s brow furrowed, his face finally back to the state of fury he was known for. “Coins, huh?” he growled and, like the feral beast Kim Dokja had long known him for, he finally attacked.
Kim Dokja had been waiting for the ground to crumble under his feet since the beginning of the scenario, but he wasn’t expecting that Yoo Joonghyuk would be the one to sweep him off his feet as he kissed him.
Kim Dokja bit slightly the other man’s lips, feeling all the nails of anxiety and panic crumbling into smoke as Yoo Joonghyuk held him.
“You really will be the death of me…” Kim Dokja laughed.
Yoo Joonghyuk didn’t like the joke one bit and just doubled down on the growling, kissing him back more fiercely. “Don’t you fucking dare die now.”
Everyone else just ignored them. They had 200,000 coins to collect, after all.
“Hey Uriel,” Kim Dokja called up to a now delirious and frantically sobbing mess Uriel, who had spammed the chat with her happiness for the past thirty minutes nonstop. Kim Dokja couldn’t care much now, as he was being held by Yoo Joonghyuk bridal style.
The man wasn’t keen on leaving him, afraid he would slip again from him and Kim Dokja felt that he deserved not to move his ass for once. “Where is our new story?”
[Constellation Demon-like Judge of Fire is crying out of sheer joy for her favourite companionship’s new development]
[Constellation Demon-like Judge of Fire is gifting you a new story all too happily]
[You have acquire a new story!]
[The story ‘The Most Yaoi-ful Couple’ has been acquired.]
All the good feelings Kim Dokja had been having up until now went immediately up to smoke as he read the story. Several veins popped up in his face.
“Biyoo,” Kim Dokja called his daughter, who popped out of nowhere with a very cute ‘baaht’, his voice barely hiding the fury underneath. “Close the channel. And don’t open it again.”
