Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“Alright!” VINCENT MURDER, otherwise known as Giovanni Potage slammed his hands onto the kitchen counter with an excited smile. He wasn’t in his villain outfit anymore, instead wearing a buttoned-up coat with the fluffy underside just poking out from the hood and wrists. Molly was behind him, carrying a bright red stool to reach the top shelf where the cups were. Molly looked a lot happier here than back home. Hell, Giovanni looked better too. They both looked perfectly content, peaceful even.

Unlike Rick shades, sitting across from both of them and sweating bullets.

“You said it was an emergency right? So what exactly is the problem? Did that witch kidnap Mr Naven again? Did someone get hurt?” Rick asked, his nerves making him talk faster than a fighter jet. Rick had gotten what his powers informed him was a “text” from Giovanni at around 11 pm, which Rick could barely make out after just waking up at 11:30:

“Hey Rick! It’s me, VINCENT MURDER!!! Ya know, the guy you made a demon contract with yesterday. Anyways I just realised something and you have to come over to Crusher’s house IMMEDIATELY it’s an emergency!!! I would give you the address but bear trap said you can just follow your string thingys so yea :)”

Despite his foggy brain, he managed to pick up the word ‘emergency’ and dashed out of the apartment twice. Forgetting his keys the first time. The trip would’ve normally taken at least 30 minutes to run there, but shaking hands with Naven’s lady friend allowed him to cut that time in half.

“...What?” Giovanni’s grin dimmed slightly before his face lit up with realisation. “Ooooh! yea, no it’s not that kinda emergency. This one’s even MORE IMPORTANT!” Giovanni threw his hands up for emphasis, Molly giggling as she grabbed some kind of orange drink from the fridge.

“What could possibly be more important than that?” Rick wondered. He vaguely recalled Feenie talking about an even more powerful witch she had to fight eventually so maybe it was finally time to defeat her and save the world! Rick leaned closer to the counter, his face deep in concentration.

Giovanni pointed to Rick dramatically, awkwardly holding out his hand where his cape usually was. “You want to be my evil minion, correct?”

Rick had absolutely no idea what Giovanni was talking about.

“Yep!”

“Great!” Giovanni paced back and forth as he started explaining. “You have proven yourself to be a potentially valuable member of the team with the whole, Loralei thing. However! You have one quality you have yet to demonstrate which just so happens to be the most important quality a minion can have. So! I am giving you the same test I gave Molly’s sister.”

Rick thought about this for a moment. A test not even that witch could pass? Sounds like it would take some serious power considering it was the same witch that nearly killed him. Would he have to fight someone? Rick shuttered a bit at the thought. He didn’t want to fight Giovanni. They were friends! He couldn’t do that!

Not again.

Molly looked over at Rick with a bit of worry. She could always tell when something was wrong with people she was close with. So she now noticed the way Rick fiddled with the end of his scarf just under the counter. She touched his hand gently, freeing him from his racing mind before someone locked the way out.

“Don’t worry it’s not a magic test.” She smiled, knowing exactly what he was thinking about. “And you don’t have to fight anyone either!”

“Nope! No fighting!” Giovanni put his hands on his hips. “Strength is important to be a minion yes, but this tests something WAY more important.” Rick both sighed in relief and wondered what the test could possibly be for. Loyalty? Determination? Friendship? Rick stared at Giovanni with curiosity. Giovanni smiled at this as he posed dramatically for each word.

“Your mission is to…” Giovanni held a dramatic pause. Rick leaned in so far forward he was practically laying down on the counter. “To bake some COOKIES!” Giovanni cackled, throwing his hand up in the air in triumph.

“COOKIES YES!” Rick shouted with just as much energy. “...what is that?”

Giovanni pauses, clearly caught off guard. “...You don’t know what a cookie is?” He squinted.

“Nope!” Rick smiled.

“...Remind me never to visit ocean country.”

“Ok!” Rick gave him a quick thumbs up. Not like he was planning on going back there soon.

Or ever.

Giovanni grabbed a handwritten list from near the fridge and handed it to Rick. The handwriting was clearly Molly’s. Each letter written as clearly as possible with little bears doodled between the edge of the page and a red-lined border. Rick appreciated it, The last thing he’s read in the past 8 years were the notes scratched into the walls from past colosseum p̶r̶i̶s̶o̶n̶e̶r̶s̶ fighters, so he was a bit rusty with reading as a whole.

“Ok, so a cookie is sweet kinda food disc ya gotta bake from this stuff.” Giovanni leaned over and pointed to the word ‘ingredients’ with a bunch of other words that Rick didn’t recognise beneath it. Giovanni noticed Rick’s confused squinting and put a hand to his chin in thought.

“Ya know what? Since you don’t know what you’re doing at all, I’ll tell you the basics so you don’t burn the house down! But for the rest of it, you’re on your own.” Giovanni said like he was a bad guy in a kid's tv show talking about his trap to catch the heroes.

“No, no, no, you don’t need to help me directly!” Rick grinned, his eyes crackling with dark power. “With the power of SOULMATES! I can-”

“Nope! You can’t use your powers!”

“What? Why not?” Rick deflated like he was told he can’t get a dog for Christmas.

“Because that’s what makes it a challenge! If you could just use your powers to bake them perfectly then it wouldn’t really test you on anything! It’s like doing a math test but the teacher hands you the answer key. There’s no point!” Giovanni explained, his hands moving wildly to emphasise his point.

“Hmm, I see. VERY WELL THEN!” Rick bellowed, despite not understanding half of what Giovanni just said. “I shall create these cook-ezes and show that I have what it takes to become AN EVIL MINION!” Rick cackled and threw his head back as pure black lightning sparked around his form.

“THAT’S THE SPIRIT!” Giovanni mimicked Rick’s pose, laughing just as loud and even summoning steam to poorly recreate Rick’s dark magic. Molly summoned two silence bubbles that connected into bear-ear-shaped earmuffs before heading off to the living room.

“Alright first step,” Giovanni snapped forward, almost falling over in the process. “Gotta preheat the oven to 180C.” Giovanni pointed just below part of the counter to a large grey box with a handle sitting just above a partially blacked-out glass that just barely allowed him to see a pair of metal racks sitting inside.

“Oh! Naven showed me how to use this enchanted heat box!” Rick beamed, rushing towards the oven and squatting down to reach the knobs.

“Woah, really?” Giovanni had talked to the guy a bunch during the Lorelei incident since he was both the second judge and technically their hostage. Naven talked a bit about his work and how stressful it got sometimes. So it was pretty surprising that Naven had time

“Yea! He gave me a few tips for using this ‘technology’!” Rick chirped, turning the knob to 180C. “Like how I shouldn’t put forks in the strange holes in the walls! Or the ‘microwave’! Or the ‘toaster’! There are a lot of places on the surface where you can’t put forks!”

Giovanni quietly considered whether or not letting the guy who just learned not to put a fork in an electrical socket into a kitchen by himself was a good idea.

His brain said yes.

“Great!” Giovanni spun around towards the cupboard, “All the bowls are up here and the wooden spoons are down here.” He gestures towards a drawer right next to Rick. “Now! If you need me, I’m going to be helping Bear Trap with her maths homework in the lounge room. You have an hour to finish them! See ya!” Giovanni gave a final wave and left the kitchen. And just like that Rick was left alone in a room full of things that could potentially kill him.

What could possibly go wrong?

—

Rick looked down at the recipe with determination in his eyes. This was his chance to prove to Giovanni that he really was a good friend! If he failed then Giovanni might stop being friends with him, and he didn’t want to lose a new friend now did he?

This whole ‘baking’ thing seemed pretty similar to alchemy so maybe that’s just what the surface dwellers called it! The surface alchemy recipe called for a cup of butter and sugar to be mixed into a large bowl. Like a glass cup? Seemed about right. Rick opened the cabinet with the glasses in it and grabbed one. Walking over to the cupboard and grabbing the butter, filling the glasses to the brim with each item and then dumping them in a huge metal bowl.

The recipe then said to beat them both together. Rick stared at this part of the paper for a while. What did it mean by beat? Like in combat? Rick looked over at the bowl. How would he defeat both of these ingredients in a fight? He was told he can’t use magic so that’s a no-go. But if these ingredients can fight back that means that they must have some magic right? Rick thought about it for a moment. He turned away from both the ingredients, humming a tune to disarm them both, before slamming his fist into the bowl. Their guts spilling all over the bowl and some of Rick’s scarf.

“Ah ha! If you thought you could defeat Rick Shades then you are mistaken!” Rick cackled at the ingredients, who never stood a chance against Rick’s power.

Rick smiled at his work before turning back to the list. Now he needed to beat vanilla extract and an egg in. Rick stared at the list. Just one egg? But fish eggs were tiny! How were they going to fill up a whole bowl? Rick opened the cupboard up and looked for them, but he found nothing even close to fish eggs. He then opened up the fridge only to be met with the same thing. There was a carton of something labelled eggs but they looked nothing like eggs, must’ve been a mistake. Well, if there’s only one tiny fish egg needed for the recipe he could probably just skip it right? Yea that made sense.

Now he needed vanilla extract. Rick reached into the cupboard and after some searching, he found a tiny bottle that had ‘vanilla extract’ written on it. Rick wondered why they only needs a couple drops of the stuff. It can’t be that powerful.cRick opened the lid carefully and gave it a sniff…

Rick chugged 90% the bottle and gagged.

How could something that smells so amazing taste so bad? Rick had no idea. Why would you ever want to eat something like this? Maybe it’s a sacrificial food, like Karmel back in the deep. Rick carefully added a couple of drops to the bowl, making sure to defeat it in combat just like the butter and sugar.

After stirring in the flour and chocolate chips in he started laying the globs of dough out onto the baking tray. After the 3rd glob of dough splattered on the baking paper, he decided to try and make the cookies different shapes. He made a couple of heart and star-shaped ones along with some vague bear shapes.

He wanted to make a couple shaped for Vincent, but despite being his friend, he didn’t know that much about him. Rick thought about it before making a round cookie with long horns sticking out the top and little wings that resembled the ones he had in that witches' world. It was wonky to one side but Rick was too happy about making something for his friends to care. Rick popped the baking tray into the oven with a giddy feeling rising in his chest.

Rick stood confidently as he looked down at the list in triumph. Apparently, all he had to do now was wait until the cookies looked golden brown and then they’d be done! Rick waddled over the oven and crouched in front of it, staring at the cookies intently. After about a minute, Rick’s mind started to look for something, anything, to keep him occupied.

For some reason, his brain decided the Colosseum was something worth coming back to.

He couldn’t really give any of his friends back in the ocean anything. Sometimes he would patch up their clothes with heart patches cut from his scarf, but that was about all he could do for them. He wished he could give some of them these strange surface foods as gifts but with them all still being down there…

“̶N̶o̶,̶ ̶s̶t̶o̶p̶ ̶t̶h̶i̶n̶k̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶a̶b̶o̶u̶t̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶m̶.̶ ̶Y̶o̶u̶ ̶c̶a̶n̶’̶t̶ ̶d̶o̶ ̶a̶n̶y̶t̶h̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶a̶b̶o̶u̶t̶ ̶i̶t̶,̶ ̶y̶o̶u̶ ̶k̶n̶o̶w̶ ̶t̶h̶i̶s̶.̶”̶

Rick tried to shake his head but the feeling still lingered. A dread and regret that choked any happiness he had before. Rick fiddled with his scarf, pulling it away from his neck. After the connection between him and his friends was severed, he thought that his friends had given up on him, but they hadn’t. His epithet was just out of range. He might have almost drowned but he was fine now!

But they didn’t know that.

Rick’s breathing hitched. Did his friends think he was dead? Rick hated the thought but it latched onto his brain like a parasite. He knew that losing a friend from death was different than breaking up a friendship. Instead of shattering into pieces, the thread flickers like static before disappearing into nothing. The string shattering was the only reason he knew his friends weren’t dead. In a weird way, it was sort of comforting that at least he didn’t get them killed. But again, they didn’t know that.

Did his friends blame themselves for his ‘death’? This thought was even worse than the last. Rick always hated seeing his friends sad, even before he knew about his epithet. He always had a heightened sense of empathy, sometimes feeling emotions even more than the person who actually had bad things happen to them. It was how he really became friends with people in the Colosseum. Always willing to listen and comfort the people stuck in the hell they didn’t deserve. It always made him feel a bit better about being stuck there as well. Being able to comfort the other people with him kept him sane in a way, one of the few things that kept him tethered to himself no matter how badly he got injured during the fights with each of them.

He couldn't help them up here.

Rick shook his head again. He couldn’t keep thinking like this! What was that thing Molly taught him that calmed people down?

Rick took in a deep breath, held for 4 seconds, out. Breathe in, hold for 4 seconds, and out.

Rick repeated this a couple of times. He felt better, lighter in a way. Like a massive weight was just taken off his shoulders. He had lost track of time completely and had no idea how long the cookies had been in the oven but judging by the smoke pouring out of the oven they were probably done!

Wait-

How long had he just been sitting there?! Rick open the oven and was immediately sent into a coughing fit as black smog rushed out to infect the outside air. Rick grabbed the tray and slammed it onto the counter. The cookies were completely black, very far off from the brown they were supposed to be. He’d failed. He had a test to pass and he failed.

Rick was crying now, big gloopy tears dripping on the counter. He just wanted to prove to Vincent that he was a good friend! But if he couldn’t even follow a simple recipe how could he ever be a good friend now? Rick was so busy sobbing over the charcoal he’d just made that he didn’t notice the lounge room door slamming open.

“Hey! How are the cookies going-” Giovanni’s brain short-circuited as he watched Rick weep over a tray of very burnt cookies. Thankfully he’d already opened all the windows so at least the black smoke couldn’t hurt him, even if it already hit Rick emotionally.

“I- I burnt them.” Rick managed to hiccup out through the spit pooling in the back of his throat. “I’m sorry.” Something that sounded like a broken squeaky toy left his throat as the tears somehow multiplied.

“Hey hey hey! Don’t cry!” Giovanni rushed over to Rick, grabbing a tissue on the way there and handing it to him. Rick ate it and started crying harder.

“I tried to watch them I really did!” Rick sniffled, “But I got distracted! And I-” Rick was crying too hard to even speak at this point. Giovanni grabbed another tissue and decided to just dab it on Rick’s face so he didn’t eat it again.

“It’s just cookies dude,” Giovanni said, somehow turning ‘dude’ into one of the most comforting words Rick’s ever heard in his life. “It’s not that big a deal.”

“But I failed the test,” Rick sank into his scarf. The louder Rick was, the happier he was. And this was the quietest noise Giovanni’s heard from him. “I’m not gonna be an evil minion and you’re not gonna wanna be my friend,” Rick said like he was being sent to a guillotine.

“Huh?” Giovanni tilted his head like a confused cat. “What!? No no no no no! I would never break a friendship pact with a wizard! That’s like, rule 1 of not getting cursed!” Giovanni stated like it was the most obvious thing in the world, Rick sort of followed.

“You're, not gonna stop being my friend?” Rick asked, wiping his tears on his jacket sleeve.

“Nope! Why would I? You’re still cool. Plus, I like what you did with these shapes!” Giovanni leans down and picks up a now slightly malformed and extremely burnt cookie with two points coming out the top. “Is this a gargoyle? Like what we both were when we punched that s’more dragon?” Rick nodded, tears still blocking his throat. “Awesome!” Giovanni threw it up in the air and sunk his fangs into it like a dog catching scraps falling from a table. “Not bad!” He smiled, bits of what looked like coal stuck between his teeth. “You’re super cool dude! Even if you weren’t a wizard, I’d still wanna be your friend.”

Giovanni might as well of just dropped a lit match near dynamite, Rick's wails were just as loud as an explosion anyway. He practically threw himself into a hug with Giovanni. Squeezing him like he’d disappear if he let go. Giovanni patted Rick on the head comfortingly as he tried to avoid toppling over from Rick fully leaning into him. Giovanni noticed how despite still struggling to hold his weight, Rick wasn’t dragging him down nearly as much as he should’ve been. His weight seemed closer to Molly’s than a grown man that was 6’2ft. He’ll ask about that later. Rick needed comfort right now, not questions.

They stayed like that for a while until Rick’s sobs turned into sniffles. “You alright?” Giovanni asked, giving Rick a pat on the back.

“Yea, I’m fine,” Rick said, some of the colour returning to his voice.

“Good, now I can finally eat more of your cookies!” Giovanni broke the hug and reached over for a star-shaped cookie, popping the obsidian piece in his mouth with a smile.

Rick looked over to the cookies. He hadn’t actually tried them yet. Maybe they weren’t so bad. He picked up a heart-shaped piece and shoved it into his mouth. It was really crunchy, and they felt like they’d never even touched water. So naturally, Rick reached for another one.

“See? They’re pretty good!” Giovanni gave Rick a smile. It was lop-sided, little bits of charcoal stuck in between his teeth.

Rick gave Giovanni a worn smile back, one dug up from a time before he knew he even had an epithet. He could still feel the black string that bonded their souls stay strong.

Neither of them noticed Molly peek her head out from behind the lounge room door. She was going to ask for some help with her geometry work but instead, she found herself watching her friend and her boss both eat what looked like coal together. She guessed that was what remained of the cookies. It was strangely sweet to watch. It was nice to see Rick actually becoming friends with people, even if it involved eating inedible stuff with her boss.

“Bear trap!” Giovanni yelled through a mouthful of garbage. “Come look at the cookies Rick made!” Molly smiled as she walked over into the kitchen. Looking over at the cookies, she could see that most of them were shaped into little hearts, with a couple of vague bear shapes thrown in too.

“Well now that’s done, I still need to grade you on how you did!” Giovanni pipped up, grabbing a piece of paper and writing some notes, a black cookie still hanging out of his mouth. “Bear trap, you’ll be my co-judge!”

“But I haven’t eaten the cookies yet?”

Giovanni looked over at Rick and bent down so only Molly could hear him. “Well, I’m not exactly judging the cookies here. I’m looking for something else…” Both of them looked over at Rick. They both waddled over to the corner of the kitchen so Rick couldn’t make out their whispering.

Rick’s mood switched like a light bulb from excitement to nervousness. He fiddled with the fabric of his gloves as he waited for his final judgement. Sure his cookies might of been b̶u̶r̶n̶t̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶a̶s̶h̶ perfectly edible, but did he show that most important quality Vincent was looking for? He had no idea what it could even be, much less if he passed. Rick’s legs shook like a newborn deer as he awaited his fate.

After what felt like years, Giovanni and Molly finally rose from their huddle. Giovanni pointed at Rick while Molly had a small but sweet smile on her face. “Well, after some consideration, we have come to the conclusion that on Vincent Murder’s evil exam, you have received…A C-!” Molly tugged on Giovanni’s leg and whispered something to him. “Oh, yea I forgot you have no idea what that means.” Giovanni hmm’d as he tried to translate the letter into something the ocean wizard hobo would understand.

“Well after a bit more consideration, we now know that you.” Giovanni paused for dramatic effect, Molly doing a little drum roll on her lap. “YOU HAVE PASSED THE EXAM!”

Rick’s face lit up with the most genuine and excited smile the two of them had ever seen. “YES I PASSED!!” Rick screamed, black lighting crashing behind him. Little sparks still dancing on his form as he lifted Molly into a spinning bear hug. Molly giggled as she spun around just enough to not make her dizzy.

“Yep! You have shown the most important quality a minion can have! You never tried to hide away the cookies despite thinking you failed the test! Showing that you have the full ability to lose, even if you did cry for about 10 minutes over it.” Giovanni grinned, “Now you are officially my evil minion! Meaning you get to join Molly and me in doing CRIMES!” Rick could do crimes! He actually committed one by escaping ocean country! Hopefully, these surface crimes would be a little bit easier to pull off. But as long as he had his friends with him, they were definitely going to be more fun.

“And since your an evil minion now, you’re gonna have to meet the rest of MY BOYS!” Giovanni screamed before taking out his phone nonchalantly and typing something in the group chat with his tongue sticking out.

VINCENT MURDER!!: “Hey guys! You gotta come over to headquarters STAT! I’ve got us a new evil minion to introduce!”

Spike: “Woah! Who is it?”

VINCENT MURDER: “Ya know that wizard guy I was talking about a while ago? Yea he’s joining our bad guy group :)

The entire chat erupted into questions, mostly from the people who weren’t up at 11 pm when it was sent also known as Ben. Giovanni simply said that of they wanted to know more about him then they would have to come over to Crusher’s place. So of course, almost all of them grabbed their bags and ran out the front door to meet a real-life dark magic user! What would he be like? Dark and mysterious? A full-on fantasy supervillain?! On their bad-guy team! Each of their minds raced with possibilities of what this strange man might be like.

And just like that, Headquarters (also known as Crusher's house) somehow became even more chaotic.

Chapter Text

Rick sat on top of the counter, his legs swinging back and forth. He wasn’t just going to meet a new friend, he was going to meet new friends! Plural! Giovanni had told him some of their names because Rick kept glancing over at his phone. He also told him each of their roles in crimes. Dark Star was the brains, Spike was the ruthless fighter, Crusher was the muscle, Car Crash was the getaway driver, Flamethrower was the acrobat, and Ben has a Netflix account. They all sounded so cool! Rick watched the clock carefully for the fabled time they were to arrive. 1:15 pm…

“Hey Odi,” Odi turned his head around at the mention of his name. Molly had climbed up on the bench next to him, a silence bubble was formed around the two so Giovanni couldn’t hear them.

Odi’s smile softened at her voice. “Yes, is everything alright?”

“Remember what I said about not immediately trying to become friends with people.”

Odi felt his excitement melt into a puddle of wet goop. Molly had given him a lesson on making friends and earning people's trust. Naven encouraged the idea since explaining ideas to an audience was an important part of interpersonal communication, even if it was an audience of one. Plus, having Rick freak people out less was a nice bonus.
—

“You can’t become friends with someone just by shaking their hand. You have to earn the other person’s trust in order to form a bond with them. Otherwise, the friendship doesn’t have a strong enough foundation.” Molly said, pointing to the cardboard poster she and Giovanni made by hand. It had “FRIENDSHIP 101” at the top with several exclamation marks on the end and ‘cool’ stickers surrounding the border. You could tell Giovanni was in charge of decorations.

“But I became friends with you, Phoenicia and Trixie that way and I am very close with all of you!” Odi asked, sitting cross-legged on the floor like a 1st grader.

“Well, we only became close after we spent a lot more time hanging out with you,” Molly replied gently. “Most people are kind of… put off by being struck with lighting by people they don’t know.” Molly laughed out nervously, trying desperately to avoid the term ‘creepy’ when describing how Odi made friends.

“...But what about Vincent-”

“Boss is just like that.”

—

“But I have to get to know these friends well if we are all evil minions! How are we supposed to commit these crimes without a strong bond?” Odi asked, slumping over in defeat.

“You’ll get there.” Molly patted him on the shoulder, an encouraging smile on her face. “It’ll just take a bit more time, but you’ll have a much stronger friendship because of it!”

“Hmmm. Alright!” Odi hopped off the counter and turned back to face Molly, his own signature grin on his face but now it actually reached his eyes. “If that's what it takes to become their friends then I accept this challenge!” Rick bellowed, his eyes going dark with power as lighting shot out of his sunglasses. Molly couldn’t help but laugh along with him, her soft giggles contrasting with Rick’s belly laugh.

“Woah, Boss wasn’t kidding when he said he had an actual evil wizard!”

Both of them paused and stared at the door. The scratchy voice came from a girl whose sharp teeth grinned at both of them. Her hair was a light but dulled blue with her light brown roots being tucked into her beanie. She had an oversized jumper that fell off her shoulders that showed the black straps of a tank top underneath. She had several accessories with two necklaces, two bracelets on each hand, and several piercings.

She looked even cooler than Rick had imagined.

“Spike!” Giovanni ran over to his minion from sitting on the couch. Barely stopping in time to not bowl her over. Giovanni asked her about something that neither Rick nor Molly could make out, but based on Spike’s smug face when she responded and Giovanni’s grin they knew the answer was yes.

“I brought snacks!” A kinder voice yelled out from the driveway. He poked his head around the doorframe and revealed his curly brown hair and freckles, a pair of glasses resting on his slightly curved nose. They looked new despite the piece of tape just barely sticking the bridge together.

“I got some games!” Another person with indigo hair partially pulled up into a bun rested his head on top of the other’s curls. He wore a mostly black hoodie with a light blue hood and sleeves. He had a little star pin on the right side of his chest. The curly-haired boy smiled but it was more annoyed than happy to see him.

“And I showed up!” A figure Molly could barely make out a boy with ginger hair as he popped his head out from the car, carrying a couple of blankets and pillows.

“Car Crash! Dark Star! Ben! Wait, I thought Flamethrower was in the carpool with you. Where is he?” Giovanni paused his excitement-fueled yelling with a confused and disappointed look.

“Yea, he had cheer practice so he’s gonna show up around two.” Dark Star answered, Giovanni’s spirit rebounded immediately as he nodded with determination.

Rick was practically vibrating now, bouncing on his toes with pure excitement. Knowing he was going to meet this many friends was one thing, but actually seeing them was completely different. Not only did they sound cool but they looked cool! And they all committed crimes just like him! Rick didn’t even notice he stopped breathing until Molly put a hand on his shoulder.

“Are you ok?” She asked with an undertone of concern colouring her voice.

“Better than ever! They all look so cool. I’m not sure what I’m gonna say to all of them.” Rick gestured to the group of people surrounding Giovanni. Molly looked at him like he just told her jumping off a 100-story building would let her fly but she smiled anyway.

“Just remember the lesson ok?”

“Right, right. Got to make a good first impression.” Rick dusted off his coat and took a deep breath, calming the bouncing down to only two a second rather than two-hundred.

“Hey, you’re that demon wizard guy right?” Rick practically jumped back at Dark Star’s voice. Molly’s mute bubble was still active so he didn’t hear the other minion approach.“Oh sorry dude, didn’t mean to do that.” Dark Star stepped back a bit, reaching his hand out calmly. “Nice to meet you man.” The indigo-haired boy smiled. Rick stared at the hand for 3, 2, 1…

“He’s offering me friendship immediately.”

Rick wasted no time and grabbed the other minion’s hand firmly with both of his. A black bolt of lightning shot out of Rick’s hand before forming a thread that pierced both their hearts. Rick's eyes melted into his sunglasses and his stupid excited smile turned uncanny and sinister. Just as quickly as it happened, Rick pulled his hand away. The string and black lighting disappeared from Dark Star’s body, though some sparks still clung to Rick like a lightning rod.

“There! Now we’re officially friends and can commit crimes together!” Rick blurted out, still bouncing on his toes from the dopamine rush.

“...Okay!” Dark Star's shout wobbled with an edge of fear as he held his hand in the exact spot Rick left it. Molly gave Rick a glare, crossing her arms in disappointment. Rick looked over at her a sighed like his mum scolded him for not cleaning his room.

“Look, I know I shouldn’t offer friendship right away but he offered me a handshake!” Rick’s voice had a hint of sadness behind it. “He was asking for something! And who would I be to turn down an opportunity for companionship?” Molly gestured towards Dark Star, still staring straight ahead like a deer in headlights. Rick looked at him and finally conceded with a huff.

“So like uh, what did you… do?” Dark Star asked, finally freeing himself from shock.

Rick’s smile immediately returned to his face, apparently learning nothing from Molly’s lesson. “Well, you see my dear friend. My epithet is… SOULMATES!” The black lighting returned full force and struck the ground. An embarrassed blush covered Dark Star’s face as he broke out into confused sputters.

“Wow, I can’t believe Dark Star was the first one out of us to get a boyfriend.” Ben chimed in smugly. Dark Star glared at him hard until he backed down, but not without whispering something to Spike. Dark Star’s embarrassment only grew as Spike snickered at him.

“No no no, I don’t mean romantics. It means that I keep my mates in my soul!” Rick corrected. Dark Star still looked confused but he wasn’t blushing as hard so Rick considered it a win. “Whatever my friends can do, I can do! So, Dark Star was it? What can you do?”

“Uhhhhhhhh,” Dark Star looked over at Molly, quietly asking what this wizard hobo’s deal was. Molly just nodded in a way that showed he was safe. “I- I can make clones of stuff, kinda. Usually, they’re kinda the opposite of the cloned thing? I don’t know, it's hard to explain…” Dark Star tried to explain his epithet as best he could. He interpreted it differently than most people he knew would so just telling Rick his epithet might have just confused him.

“WOW COOL!” Rick shouted, not picking up the other minions' discomfort at all. The wizard picked up one of the few remaining cookies. A black and purple aura with sparks of lighting surrounded the charcoal bear before another cookie popped into existence in Dark Star’s hand, this one noticeably less burnt. Rick smiled at his work as Molly made a little ta-da motion with her hands.

“Huh, you really are a wizard...” Dark Star squinted at the cookie in his hand like it would flicker out of existence any second.

“Yes!”

“...Alright you seem cool. Welcome to the team my guy.” Dark star grabbed the cookie and put half of it in his mouth before walking over to the door. “Wanna watch a movie?”

“I have no idea what that is but absolutely!” Rick grinned.

Dark Star shot him a lazy grin back before walking over to the front door where he haphazardly dropped his backpack. “Heh, this guy’s weird, I like him. Did you find him in a dumpster or…?” Dark Star asked Giovanni, grabbing his laptop with at least fifty pirated movies on it and an HDMI cable.

“Nah, Molly apparently found him on the beach half dead though. I had to pour soup into his mouth 'cause he was knocked out cold!” Giovanni said with a shark-toothed grin. “He’s less dead now though, I think… Hey Rick! Are you dead?!”

“I hope not!”

“Yea he’s probably fine.” Giovanni shrugged, “Apparently he’s from ocean country which is how he ended up there. He’s only been up here for about a week though.”

The entire room seemed to stop moving. All of Giovanni’s boys turned to look at Rick who was completely oblivious to their gazes. Just as quickly, the room slammed into high energy as almost everyone ran towards Rick to ask him questions.

“Can you breathe underwater!?” “Are epithets and magic the same thing?!” “Do you guys actually eat babies or was that documentary my mum watched last night lying?”

Rick backed up instinctually but his eyes lit up with excitement. They all wanted to talk to him? They thought he was cool too!? Rick thought about this for a moment, staring at the expectant teenagers before regaining his composure as an idea formed in his head.

“Well alright, I will tell you, BUT under one condition…” Rick’s eyes turned that same inky black as before, slightly yellow teeth grinning underneath them. “That you’d all become… My friends.” Rick stretched out a hand, lighting as black as the void dancing on his fingertips. The group of teenagers all seemed to pause, most of them seeming slightly wary of the guy who acts like a twist villain in a movie that even the seven-year-olds could guess was bad.

Keyword: most.

“Alright!” Spike’s shark teeth smiled back, grabbing the cartoon villain’s hand. Black lighting struck both of them with a powerful thud. Rick's smile grew wider, Spike returned the gesture whole-heartedly. The other’s stared at Rick wide-eyed.

“Yea, I don’t think I’m doing that…” Ben said, eyeing Rick like he was radioactive. No one else said anything but it was clear that most people agreed with that statement. Rick’s smile faltered a bit before it returned with a bit of smugness underlining the usual creepiness.

“Well, I guess I’ll only be answering Spike and Dark Star’s questions then.” Rick huffed triumphantly. The other blasters all looked at each other. Rick had done it! Now they all had to be friends with him and he could become just as cool as them. Rick looked at them expectantly only for them to turn towards Spike and Dark Star and spew the same mess of questions they’d just bombarded Rick with.

Rick watched as Spike and Dark Star told them all to ask one at a time so they could actually hear fuck all they were saying and tried to hide the hurt from the immediate rejection. Certainly doing… a job at that. Spike turned around to him, opening her mouth to ask questions for the boys all piled right behind her.

Well, he was a man of his word.

“Can you breathe underwater?”

“I could before. But that was because of a friend's epithet.” Rick tried to smile at the thought of his friend but it felt strained, more strained than normal anyway. Spike didn’t seem to notice and kept talking on the boy's behalf.

“Are epithets and magic the same thing?”

Rick lit up at the question. “No actually! Epithets are typically the way dark magic is powered but they aren’t the same thing. You can actually do magic without an epithet through alchemy and runes. Using an epithet is faster if you have one but it’s not necessary.” The other minions whispered to each other from behind Spike’s back which Rick hoped was a good thing.

“Do you guys eat babies or is the documentary Ben’s mum watched lying to her?”

“What?”

“What?”

“...”

“Welp! That’s enough questions for today.” Rick clapped his hands together in a desperate attempt to cut the tension. “Anyway, what is this movie thing we’re watching? It’s not a fighting tournament, is it?” Rick’s words quaked with uncertainty.

“Nah that’s boxing,” Dark Star was too busy trying to find the HMDI port on Crusher’s TV to see Rick freeze with panic. “A movie’s like a story that plays through this TV if I can get it to worrrrkk… there it is.” Dark Star rested his hand on the TV just as the display switched to his folder labelled “Movies Bear Trap can watch”.

“It’s ready guys!” The other minions ran over and took up their respective spots. There was no more room on the couch so Rick stood there awkwardly like a video game character before you pick up the controller.

“Down here ocean man!” Spike yelled despite being three feet away from him. She’d grabbed a blanket from the pile Ben brought in and threw it on the floor to make it comfier. Rick quickly joined her, mimicking her hunched-over pose. Dark Star fiddled with the laptop until he got a video file up and running at 480p max. He gave a thumbs up over to Molly and Giovanni, who were standing next to the light switch and main window respectively.

“Alright! Action!” Giovanni yelled, flipping the blinds down just as Molly flipped the light switch. The room was showered in darkness, as dark as you could get at 1:30 pm anyway. Molly ran over to the couch and Giovanni went over to the kitchen to look for something as Dark Star hit play.

Rick stared at the TV screen with wonder. He’d never seen anything like this “movie” before. It was filled with enough colour and light to put even the busiest streets of Sweet Jazz City to shame. The main character had just managed to sneak into a science building with himself from another dimension when Rick’s immersion was snapped in half by the sound of Giovanni’s voice.

“I found the snacks!” He yelled, popping a red gummy snake in his mouth. He ran over and hopped over the back of the couch, somehow perfectly managing to land on the tiny bit of empty space left. Everyone grabbed a fist full of gummies before Rick could even ask for one. Leaving only a couple of lollies left. Giovanni groaned as soon as he looked inside the bag.

“Blegh, licorice…” Giovanni said as if he was about to tell his friends that the gummies were toxic friends. “Who the hell even made licorice a lolly flavour? It’s like they’re trying to disappoint the last person to open the bag…”

“I will take them!” Rick snatched the bag out of Giovanni’s hand and bit the head off one of the gummy snakes with a grin. Giovanni looked at him like he’d just ripped off the head of a baby instead.

“Wait, you actually like licorice?”

“Why wouldn’t I? Are surface people allergic to licorice?” Rick eyed the gummy bears as if staring at them would unlock a hidden clue. “Seems odd to make them in the first place then.”

“So that’s the price you pay for dark magic… I feel sorry for you man.” Dark Star lowered his own handful of lollies. The others all lowered their heads like Dark Star was giving Rick a eulogy.

“But I feel fine. They don’t taste poisonous… I think.”

“The first stage of grief: denial.” Ben put a hand over his heart, he was crying. The room went silent as everyone mourned the shadow wizard man they had just met. Molly tapped Rick on the shoulder when the others weren’t looking and grabbed a single black gummy snake. Shoving it in her mouth before anyone noticed her eating the forbidden lolly. Rick tried to prevent her from eating the poison but Molly told him they were fine. They both continued watching the movie and sharing gummies with each other, carefully avoiding the others' gaze.

A loud knock at the door interrupted the minute of silence for Rick. Molly has to quickly shove the licorice gummy bear in her mouth to avoid being seen.

“I’ll get it.” Dark Star offered. He got off the couch and opened the door only to meet Flamethrower, his cheerleading uniform still on.

“Sorry I couldn’t get here earlier, coach wanted us to stay behind a bit longer to practise flips.” Flamethrower reached into his backpack and pulled out the coke he had grabbed on the way there.

“Nah it’s all good man.” Dark Star waved his hand in a ‘don’t worry about it’ motion and let Flamthrower inside.

“So where’s that wizard guy boss was talking about?”

“HELLO!” Rick yelled from the floor, his all-to-wide smile front and centre. Flamethrower eyed him up and down like he was going to pounce on him any second.

“You don’t look that much like a wizard…” He mumbled. Staring at the homeless-looking man sitting on his friend’s blanket.

“Ah, but I very much am one! Behold!” Rick stood up and lifted his hand to the air. At least six pieces of black thread were wrapped around his finger, all glowing with dark purple electricity. Four of them all shot out towards his boss and his fellow minions.

“Yep, he’s a wizard alright.” Molly lifted her pinky finger, the black thread wrapped around it into a bow. Flamethrower was still eyeing Rick like he’d pull a bomb out of his jacket any minute. “He won’t hurt you, promise.” Molly smiled sheepishly.

Rick seemed to jump at Molly's comment. The thought of someone being uncomfortable with a dark magic user in the room never crossed his mind. “Of course I wouldn’t hurt you!” He sputtered, “I would never hurt a potential friend!” Rick’s eyes were tearing up at even the thought. Molly gave him a little pat on the back for reassurance to calm him down.

Flamethrower stared the wizard down before shrugging and sitting down on the floor with him and Spike, not seeming to mind jumping into the film halfway through.

Rick watched him sit down only for something about him to catch his eye.

“What’s that?” Rick pointed at the bracelet on Flamethrower’s wrist. It was made out of some kind of multi-coloured loops and some beads. Rick had seen bracelets before but never ones that looked like that.

“Oh yea my friendship bracelet. Spike made it for me like two months ago.” Flamethrower shrugged, opening the bottle of coke with a loud hiss.

“Friendship bracelet?” Rick tilted his head like a confused puppy. “Is it magic?”

Spike snorted at Rick’s confused comment. “Might as well of been! Back in middle school. If you saw your best friend with a friendship bracelet from someone else, you needed to have a talk.”

“But how can you choose just one friend to give the enchanted bracelet?”

“Eh, the rules aren’t exactly set in stone. You can give them to all your friends if you want. Like how we’re gonna do now!” Spike swiftly grabbed her backpack and reached her entire hand down into it before pulling out a box filled with multicoloured loops. She threw it at the wizard who just barely managed to catch it. Rick stared down at the box like it was made of pure gold.

“Ah! so these are the materials needed to make these fabled ‘friendship bracelets’.” Rick was vibrating with excitement as he opened the box up.

“Yea I can teach you how to make ‘em if you want.”

“I absolutely want!” Rick bellowed, black sparks of electricity flicking around him. Rick’s powers get more powerful and uncontrollable with his emotions so he might as well of been a walking battery now.

“Great!” Spike shuffled over closer to him as she began explaining how to connect the rubber rings together using his fingers. Rick stared right at her with a look of utmost concentration on his face. Spike put the box in between the both of them so they could both grab them when needed.

He picked up a handful of pastel pink, blue and yellow loops and quickly got started on trying to make his first bracelet. He struggled a bit at the start, a couple of the loops snapping which almost brought him to tears. He quickly got used to it though, weaving the bracelet together with a look of determination on his face.

“Molly, can I put this around your hand for a second?” Rick asked suddenly, startling the bear cub who got used to the silence.

“Huh? Why?” Rick lifted up the bracelet he’d made so far along with the little sheep bead he hadn’t added yet. Molly stared at it before her eyes lit up with realisation. “Oh, it’s for Feenie!” Rick nodded with a genuine smile. Molly smiled back as she held out her hand. Rick put the bracelet around it quickly realising it was way too small. He added a couple more loops and tried again. Perfect! Rick added the little sheep onto it before closing the loop. Rick wiped the non-existent sweat off his forehead and looked over his work with a proud grin.

Rick made another bracelet with neon pink, green and purple with a potion bottle ornament for Trixie. The smile on his face was fully genuine now. He loved making things for his friends. He hadn’t done it in a long time but he could make up for it now.

The movie just ended when Molly could feel something clumsily slip onto her wrist. She was about to tell Rick that he should ask before doing stuff like that before she saw the brown and green bracelet with other pastel beads mixed in, a tiny bear ornament hanging off of it. Rick looked at her expectantly. Waiting for her response like a dog with treats held over his head. Molly made a silence bubble around both of them so she could.

“Thanks, Odi!” Molly gave him her bear cub smile. Odi gave her his 9 out of 10 dentists smile back. Black lighting transferred from Rick’s heart to the bracelet, the pure black energy slowly shifting to a forest green before vanishing in a puff of sparkles. Molly suddenly felt… different. Like she had somehow just acquired a new ability in a video game.

“Are friendship bracelets supposed to do that when you first put them on?” Odi stared at the bracelet, just as confused as Molly was.

“Odi? Did- did you enchant the bracelet? With your epithet?” Molly asked with wonder in her voice.

Odi stared at the green lighting surrounding the bear charm. “Huh, I guess I did!” He shrugged, “Though I’m not sure what that would do… You should try and use it!”

Molly looked at him sceptically. “Are you sure? I don’t wanna accidentally blow the house up…

“You won’t! Probably!” Odi smiled, “Besides, a good witch always tests out their new abilities as soon as they can!”

“But I’m not a witch though.”

“Nothing’s stopping you from becoming one!”

Molly stared at her hand before her eyes filled with determination. She put her hand out in front of her and concentrated on the spark of power. The bracelet's lighting returned. The forest green colour danced around her wrist before it shot out of her hand with the crackle of lighting. Odi stared at the lighting before his face broke out into a huge grin.

“Oh, I get it now! It’s letting you use my magic.”

“You’re… magic?” Molly brought her palm back to her face and stared at it wide-eyed. “Guess I am a witch now huh?” Odi smiled at her like a dad watching his kid ride a bike without training wheels for the first time. Molly smiled back. One filled with confidence and determination that only made Rick’s own brighter.

Odi went back to making more friendship bracelets, one for each of Giovanni’s minions and another for the certified cool dude himself. He was about halfway through making the final bracelet for Ben when he felt someone tap his shoulder.

“Hey, Spike taught me how to make these too.” Molly held out her hand, a pink and purple bracelet with a black heart ornament hanging off of it resting in her palm. Rick carefully took the bracelet and slide it onto his wrist like it was made of diamonds.

“Why thank you, newly appointed witch Molly.” He bowed as much as he could while cross-legged on the floor. Molly giggled at his antics. Her hand lifted to her face covering her smirk, showing off the brown and green bracelet instead.

Rick carefully wrapped up Ben’s bracelet before very loudly announcing his creation to the other minions. Who all scrambled over to collect their bracelets. The smile on Rick’s face brightening with each one he handed off. None of these other’s seemed to create a spark like Molly’s did. Rick figured it was because he wasn’t as close to all of them as he was with Molly. She was the only person on the surface who knew his true name after all.

After demolishing the remaining snacks and talking about whatever came to mind. A muffled sound came from Giovanni’s pocket. he pulled out his phone which was playing some song from an energetic video game soundtrack about a blue hedgehog and hit the answer call button.

“Hey Crusher!” He barked, moving towards the kitchen so the other minions could keep talking. Rick turned to Molly with a confused expression on his face.

“Who is Crusher?”

Molly’s face seemed to brighten at the name. “That’s boss’s last minion! We’re at his house right now since he was out with his mum buying stuff for a family party they’re having soon.” Rick stared down at the remaining beads in contemplation.

“Well, I can’t leave him out of this surface friendship ritual but I don’t exactly know what I could make him. Could you help me design it?”

Molly face lit up again before she leaned over and grabbed a handful of pink and brown beads. They both got to work making Crusher’s bracelet while Giovanni talked with him over the phone.

“So when do you think you’re coming back? We’ve got a new evil minion today and I want you to meet him soon!” Giovanni smiled, shark teeth front and centre. Only for that smile to slowly drop.

“Wait, you’re coming over now?”

“Yea! Me and my mum finished shopping five minutes ago. The house is clean right?” Giovanni looked around the kitchen which was absolutely covered in the ingredients for the cookies Rick made. He then looked over at the lounge room, which was covered in food crumbs and gummy bears that slipped out of his minion's hands.

“Yep!”

“Great! See you in five minutes!” The world went quiet despite his minion's chatter. Giovanni stood there in shock before he immediately scrambled over to the couch.

“CRUSHER AND HIS MUM ARE GONNA BE HERE IN FIVE MINUTES!” He screamed, “WE GOTTA CLEAN UP, STAT!” At their boss’s order, the teenagers scattered throughout the house, Car Crash sprinted over towards the vacuum, Ben and Spike started picking up the gummies hiding under the blanket, Dark Star and Flamethrower ran over to the kitchen to help their boss, and Rick and Molly sat there with decision paralysis.

“Hey new guy! We need all hands on deck here!” Flamethrower yelled from the kitchen. Rick wasted no time in getting up and darting over towards the kitchen, barely stopping in time to not slam into the cupboard. Dark Star chucked a wet sponge at him which he nearly dropped.

“Wipe the bench down!” Rick nodded with a fire in his eyes. Scrubbing at the counter like his life depended on it. Only occasionally stopping to rinse the sponge. Molly got up and started picking wrappers off the floor and putting them in the bin. Car Crash slid into the room with the vacuum cleaner in hand, making Ben and Spike sigh in relief. Each of the minions moved like clockwork around the house. Cleaning every nook and cranny in the house until-

Ding dong~

The room went quiet. Everyone stared at the door in shock. After a few seconds, Giovanni walked over to the door, each step deafening to everyone in the room. He opened the door carefully.

“Hello dear!” Crusher’s mum stood just in front of the door, her hand hovering over the doorbell. She was a rather tall and stocky woman wearing what looked like one of Crusher’s jackets over a pair of sweatpants. She leaned over and gave Giovanni a massive bear hug despite the four bags of shopping she was holding. He smiled back genuinely despite his ribs feeling like they were being crushed. Crusher stood just behind her, timidly holding the other four bags of shopping they had just bought.

“Mum, I told you not to do that anymore…” Crusher blushed a bit, trying to sink into his hoodie.

“Oh right! I probably shouldn’t do that to your-” Crusher waved his hands no as best he could with at least 20 kg of shopping in each hand.

“YOUR VERY GOOD FRIEND THAT YOU HAVE NO OTHER FEELINGS FOR WHATSOEVER! MMHM YEP!” Crusher’s mum laughed with panic underlining it. Giovanni somehow didn’t catch it at all. “So what did you all do today Mr Supervillain?” She laughed.

Giovanni’s face broke out into his signature grin. “Well, it just so happens that we have recruited a new minion to our evil organisation!”

“Oh, you’ve brought a new friend?” Crusher’s mum smiled. “It’s nice to see my boy being social and making new friends. He’s usually so shy so I appreciate you helping him branch out a bit more.”

“Mum!” Crusher whispered, his cheeks bright red with embarrassment. Crusher’s mum let out a snort at her son’s face. Offering a quick apology by kissing her son on the cheek.

“Well, I’d like to meet this ‘evil minion’ if he’s still here!” She rocked back and forth on her heel.

“Hell yea! Come on Crusher, you’re gonna love this guy. He’s a wizard!” Giovanni cackled as he walked backwards into the kitchen. The other minions quickly hid whatever cleaning supplies they had so that Crusher’s mum didn’t notice how much of a rushed job it was. Giovanni flipped around and pointed to Rick dramatically, who quickly shoved the sponge he was using into the cabinet before slamming it loudly.

“Behold! The newest edition to my criminal organisation, RICK SHADES!” Rick shook away his instinctual nerves and put on his signature ‘be my friend’ smile. Which read more like a shady car salesman’s smile but it was the thought that counted.

“Hello, Crusher! and Ms Crusher. It’s nice to meet you!” Rick shouted despite being a meter away from them at most. Crusher stepped back a bit. He wanted to trust his c̶r̶u̶s̶h̶ boss, but something about the way Rick carried himself just felt wrong. Like there was something he was hiding. Maybe not something that was his fault but Crusher could tell whatever it was it wasn’t good. Crusher’s mum, however, did not catch any of this at all and walked closer to the massive weirdo a wanted criminal let into her house.

“Hello!” She beamed like an aunt that just spotted her distant nephew at Christmas. “ Aren’t you a polite young man? First time I’ve been called Ms by any of my boy’s friends.” She giggled. “But you can just call me Lilly. Make sure you take care of my baby while I’m gone ok?” Lilly reached her hand to the top of Rick’s hair and ruffled it a bit. Rick froze at the sudden contact, not sure how to take it fully. The sensation brought back memories that hurt to even look at now. Where a much younger Odi would cry and his mother would come to comfort him. A mother that now he couldn’t even remember the face of. Rick shook his head. He shouldn’t be thinking about that now. He was on the surface now. With a brand new life ahead of him as Rick Shades. He shouldn’t be looking back now. Not when there was so much to look forward to.

“Now, before I go you boys are probably hungry, so…” She lifted the bags onto the dining table and took out her phone. “How about I order you all some pizza? Free of charge!” Everyone jumped up and cheered at the suggestion of free food. Everyone scrambled over to hunch over Lilly’s phone and pointed out what they wanted. Rick managed to unfreeze by the time Molly walked near him.

“Hey,” Molly turned around and tilted her head like a puppy. “What is this pee-za everyone’s so excited about?” Molly stared at him, eyes wide with complete shock. She didn’t even think twice before she blurted out in a sympathetic tone.

“You’ve never eaten pizza before?”

The room went quiet again. Everyone stared at Rick like he’d just shot someone in the head. Giovanni called for a minion meeting and everyone other than Rick huddled around each other, carefully deliberating something that Rick couldn’t hear. They all collectively nodded before returning back to Lilly and ordering this mystical pee-za. Giovanni walked up to Rick and put both hands on his shoulders.

“Don’t worry dude, we’ll fix this injustice.” Rick nodded despite not knowing what the hell he was talking about. “I’ll let you try my pizza.” Rick’s eyes lit up. The mention of food making him nod with enthusiasm.

“Alright, they should be here by six. Wanna go play smash until then.” Rick nodded again despite not knowing what pink haired man was saying at all. Giovanni grinned before dragging him over to the TV and turning on the strange rectangle with a red and blue controller sticking out from each side.

After about thirty minutes of trying desperately how to hold a controller before saying screw it and letting him use his powers, there was a knock at the door. Giovanni went to answer and came back with a stack of boxes that everyone quickly grabbed.

Giovanni sat down next to him and opened his own box. The smell alone was enough to make Rick drool as he stared at this pee-za.

“I usually get meat lovers but I figured since it’s your first time having pizza, I gotta introduce you to the classic!” Giovanni grabbed a slice of pizza before shoving at least half of it in his mouth at once. Somehow managing not to choke on it. Rick copied the way Giovanni held the pizza, and took a bite.

It was the most beautiful thing he had ever eaten in his life.

“Hey, you good?” Giovanni asked the frozen wizard.

“This. Is. MAGNIFICENT!” Rick screamed with joy, lighting crashing down to accentuate his joy. Rick then proceed to inhale the slice and at least half the box before Giovanni managed to get to his second slice. The only reason he stopped was so his new evil boss could experience the wonders of pee-za.

After everyone was almost or completely done with their own pizzas and Rick washed all the grease off his hands he went over to Molly and tapped her on the shoulder. He leaned down and whispered “Do you want to give Crusher the bracelet now?” to which Molly got up and immediately skipped over to him. Rick following close behind.

Molly cleared her throat right next to Crusher to get his attention. “Hey, Me and Rick made this for you. Here you go!” Molly scrounged around in her pocket before pulling out the friendship bracelet they just barely managed to finish on time.

“Yes! I was informed by Spike over there that giving these out was a sign of friendship up here. Specifically in ‘middle school’.” Crusher looked at the bracelet, looked at Rick, and then looked over at Giovanni. He relaxed his shoulders a bit before taking the bracelet with a thanks. Rick lit up more genuinely at the sealing of the pact. He also lit up the room as black lightning struck both of them at the same time. Molly gently explained to Crusher that no, he was actually not killed by a homeless wizard.

Everyone relaxed as they all sat down in the living room. Talking about whatever came to mind and sharing stupid jokes with each other. Rick didn’t get a lot of them but the others seemed happy so he didn’t mind. It was fun. Being able to talk to all these new people like this. He was used to talking to one person at a time if he managed to get even that so this was nice. But even then Rick couldn’t help but feel something crawl along his back. An uncomfortable feeling clung to him like the nudibranchs when he’d just washed up on shore. The longer it stayed, the clearer the emotion became.

It was guilt.

He felt like he didn’t deserve to be here. Not after failing for so long. Not while his friends were still down there, being forced to fight while Rick barely had to get scratched to make it here. Sure, he almost died twice but that was nothing compared to what he had to do down in the colosseum. The place was practically surrounded by death. It was the fate of everyone there. Whether it was by the ultimate leader's lightning, or being thrown into a dump it didn’t matter. The outcome for the person was ultimately the same. The only reason people tried to fight was for their reputation after their death. Either becoming a hero who sacrificed their lives for the noble king, or forgotten like the useless trash they were to him.

Rick was quiet at the end of the night. Most of the people there didn’t seem to notice. It was understandable. They only just met him a few hours ago so they’d probably think this was just something he did. Molly glanced at him a couple of times but he brushed them off by either pointing at whatever the other boys were watching on the TV or with a grin.

Rick could feel his eyes growing heavy as he stared at the movie they were all supposed to be watching. He tried to fight it but every time he closed his eyes he felt like he skipped forward in time. The others noticed this and decided to go to bed early since they wanted to set a good example for Bear Trap. They each pulled out a sleeping bag and a pillow and each found their own respective spots. Rick didn’t have one so Ben gave him a blanket and a spare pillow Car Crash had bought. They all slowly succumbed to their tiredness and passed out one by one. Rick stared up at the ceiling for the longest before the exhaustion allowed him to fall into an uneasy sleep.

Chapter Text

Odi lazily blinked the sleep out of his eyes. Part of him still expected to see the same grey walls and feel the concrete ground but instead, he felt the soft, slightly scratchy carpet and a pillow that felt softer than anything else in the world. He’d clung onto it instinctually during the night, leaving his head on the floor. He tried to ignore his pounding headache as he sat up off the floor.

It was still dark out. What Odi assumed was an artificial white light peeking out from underneath the curtain. He moved to the window and lifted the curtain a bit to try and see if he could shut it off from anywhere but found himself stopping at the sight. The slightly dimmed light of the crescent moon surrounded by thousands of tiny speaks of light that filled the sky. They remind him of the glowing jellyfish migrations he’d seen countless times by now. It took him back home, his real home, with his mother explaining with a gentle voice where they were going. It was beautiful. The star's light revealing long-forgotten memories covered in dust sat right next to his name. It hurt to look at but Odi couldn’t pull himself away. Like he was staring into the eyes of an old god that promised to reveal the secrets of the universe in exchange for his sanity.

He wondered if his parents missed him. Crusher’s own mother reminding him of the blurry memories he had of his own. He’d thought about this before. Back when the only thing he could do to occupy his mind was stare into the dark ocean through a tiny barred window. When he first got harvested, he wouldn’t have even questioned it. Of course his parents still loved him! And they were gonna come back for him as soon as he beat that squid guy back again! He could still feel their strings after all.

Odi never fought him again. He never saw them again. And every time he checked the string that connected their hearts it got weaker and weaker. The last bit of hope he had of seeing their smiles died with the black thread.

But he somehow held on. That he would be able to escape with his friends somehow and form a new life with them. Away from the dingy grey walls of their cells and out into the ocean with fish fluttering around them as they laughed over nothing. Holding each other close like they wished they could do back then. When they needed it.

That spark died too. The night he managed to escape ironically enough. He practically begged all of them to come with him but they refused. They all told him the same thing. None of them could do all the things required to escape. Only Rick with all their powers combined could ever have a hope of getting out alive. Rick hated that they were right. He still clung to the idea of them all making it out ok. That they could all be free and happy again. But he ultimately let go of that string, even with his heart begging him not to give up again.

Rick escaped that night. His heart felt heavy but with his friend's powers, he managed to push through everything, just like they planned. He made it to the surface. He was happier now. He made new friends, got to try new things, he even found the jellyfish that made the cold nights on the colosseum floor bearable again.

And god he wanted to tell them all that so bad.

Rick could feel tears start to form in his eyes and panicked. He couldn’t let the others see him like this. They wouldn’t want to be friends with him if they thought he was a crybaby. They were too cool for that. Too cool for him.

Rick carefully made his way over to the couch and grabbed his sunglasses from underneath it, making sure not to disturb the bear cub snoring softly on top of it.

As soon as the glasses settled on the bridge of his nose he let out a tiny sigh of relief. He was Rick Shades again. A man who would face any challenge with a smile on his face. Odi’s tears still clung to his cheeks so Rick calmly walked towards the bathroom with a grin that failed to reach his eyes. He should be able to get rid of them in there and head back to sleep soon.

Rick could fix this. He could deal with it by himself. No need to get anyone else involved in something that wasn’t a big deal.

---

Giovanni looked over from his phone to the clock hanging up on the wall in the lounge room. He meant to go to bed at 10 pm with everyone else, but no matter how hard or long he shut his eyes his brain wouldn’t turn off. He eventually gave up and started scrolling through his phone. Liking whatever his sleep-deprived brain found funny. Surely it hadn’t been that long right? He felt like he had only glanced at his phone for like what? Ten minutes tops. As his eyes adjusted to the darkness he could finally read the clock.

2:46 am…

Shit.

Giovanni let out a groan into the pillow as he tried to go back to sleep again. But his brain just kept bouncing thoughts off the inside of his skull like a pinball machine. He decided to get up to grab a glass of water, hoping that would help him sleep. He slowly and carefully got off the couch, grabbed his phone, and tried his best to sneak out towards the kitchen. Only for his foot to slam directly into one of his boy’s pillows. He covered his mouth to try and silence the weird noise that leapt from his throat.

“Ah crap! Sorry… uh…” Giovanni squinted in the darkness. He couldn’t make out whose sleeping bag it was due to the dark making colour impossible to see but it was clear that the person that was in there had abandoned it. Giovanni glanced around the rest of the room and counted everyone he could see.

Spike.
Crusher.
Dark star.
Flamethrower.
Car crash.
Ben.
Bear trap.
Rick-
…

Huh.

Giovanni brushed off the minor curiosity as Rick just needing to use the bathroom or something before quickly shuffling through all the other sleeping bags. Thankfully not almost kicking anyone else’s face in the process.

Giovanni turned on his phone light and snuck into Crusher’s parent's kitchen. It was definitely a lot quieter now. Little bits of the mess Rick made still clung behind toasters and kettles. Giovanni’s mind couldn’t help but wonder back to Rick. He felt like something was off as he filled his cup with some of the water from the chilled jug in the fridge. It was probably just a hunch though. He’s done this before and he’s been wrong before so he probably shouldn’t worry about it.

In the darkness, Giovanni just barely caught movement out of the corner of his eye. That was probably Rick. He was walking away from the bathroom too so Giovanni’s second idea of where he went was probably right.

“Hey, Rick!” Giovanni called just loud enough for him to hear. “You wanna have some of the leftover cookies? I was planning to share them out with everyone but they’re all sleeping right now so we might as well.” The black figure paused. Rick quickly turned towards him, revealing his wet eyes that glimmered from the fridge's light. His shades clutched loosely in his left hand. Rick flinched away, quickly putting the glasses back on as he ran off in the direction of the laundry. Giovanni couldn’t help but stare blankly where Rick once was. The glass of water clutched uselessly in his right hand.

Was Rick crying?

Giovanni felt a sick sense of dread creep up on him. How long had Rick been out here crying? Giovanni’s memory of the last few hours was loose, but he did remember hearing the sound of rustling and a door creak about 2 hours ago. Giovanni started to feel a bit guilty, maybe that baking challenge was a bit too much for him at the moment. Molly did say something about him living in ocean country his whole life so adjusting to the surface must be pretty rough. Maybe his challenge was just the straw that broke the camel's back? Giovanni shook his head like he was trying to get rid of a horsefly. No that couldn’t have been it! Rick seemed way too happy after that for it to be the problem. There has gotta be something deeper than just a few burnt cookies for him to react this badly.

Giovanni let out a little huff of determination. He didn’t know what it was but he needed to find out what was bothering his newest minion stat. After all, his minions need to be the best they can be if they want to be the strongest bad guys in the world!

Giovanni carefully walked over to the laundry door and brought his hand up to it. He knocked it gently. Rick’s breathing stopped from behind it. “Uh hey dude, you good?” No response. “I was just coming in to check if you were alright.” There was a shuffle from behind the door that dripped with panic. Giovanni heard the sound of glasses being flicked open which calmed the shuffles down somewhat.

“You can come in!” Rick finally answered in his usual overly friendly tone. His voice had noticeable cracks in it like it was taking all the energy he had to get that sentence out. Giovanni opened the door.

The laundry was quiet except for the bugs just outside the back door and the quiet rattling of the washing machine. Rick stood in the middle of the room, being illuminated only by the light of Giovanni’s phone set down in the kitchen and the tiny screen of the washing machine. His smile seemed more forced than usual.

“Hello, Vincent!” Rick’s voice wobbled as he spoke despite his cheery demeanour. Giovanni frowned, causing Rick’s face to falter slightly. “What is it?” He asked, gripping the end of his scarf nervously.

“I, uh, saw you crying earlier, are you ok?” Rick seemed caught off guard by this and looked down.

“...I didn’t think you noticed.” Rick chuckled,

“Eh, it was kinda hard not to honestly.”

Rick winced, pulling his scarf away from his neck.

“You wanna talk about it?” Giovanni walked over to the bench just above the dryer and sat on it. Rick hesitated for a bit before joining him. Still refusing to look the pink-haired man in the eyes.

“It’s kind of a long story…” Rick’s smile looked as fragile as fractured glass.

“Well, I’ve got the time!” Giovanni smiled back gently so he wouldn’t break Rick’s own.

Rick inhaled a deep breath and talked about his life in ocean country. How he was taken at the age of twelve by He Who Hungers Endlessly and forced to fight in the Colosseum. How he’d lose fights on purpose to make people like him and how it kinda worked. How people from outside started to forget about him and how he got less powerful, meaning he was bound to be disposed of. How he took his remaining friends' epithets and used them to break out the Colosseum. And how he almost drowned because he didn’t realise his powers had a range. Giovanni stayed quiet as Rick explained everything. He didn’t want to interrupt him right now. That felt wrong.

The room went quiet. Rick was staring at the floor, only seeming half-present. Giovanni had the feeling Rick was trying to say something so he gave Rick a minute to form the words he was looking for.

“I- shouldn’t want to go back.” Rick finally whispered, strained. Giovanni turned his head to face Rick. His jet-black sunglasses were off now, revealing the bags under his eyes that were just as dark. “I escaped for a reason, ya know? That place was horrible! I was forced to fight my friends, I had to watch them fight. Watch them get hurt, badly.” Rick was laughing now. It was wet with tears that had been building up to waterfalls for what sounded like years.

“And yet I still do! I want to go back and see some of them so much it hurts!” Rick pressed his palm against his forehead. Giovanni got the feeling that if it were his nails he would’ve drawn blood. “I wanna see them again, tell them I’m okay, break them out and- and bring them up here, just do something! Anything!” Rick paused, his breath shuttered as he brought his legs up off the ground and clung onto them like they were his only lifeline. Giovanni moved his hand closer to Rick’s side in case he needed it.

“But, I, can’t. I’m stuck up here. I want to go back and tell them I’m ok and that I got out and that I’m better off now. But that would just risk me getting killed right in front of them! And I- I can’t just do that to them! I can’t make them all watch as the person they risked their own lives to save chokes to death on a noose!” Rick laughed again. It was the only thing preventing his breakdown. “I- I can’t I-” Tears fell from the wizard's face like rubble, his pinkish-red eyes boiling over into hot streams of water. He buried his face into his scarf as drops quietly fell off of his chin.

His tears felt, different from before. When Rick burnt the cookies, Giovanni could feel that on some level there was something else lurking behind Rick’s tears. A deeper reason for them to fall. He knew what that was now. Rick’s tears spilled out onto the floor with little care if their creator wanted them to stop. Giovanni remained silent, taking in Rick’s words carefully. Rick’s story made him feel a lot of things, sadness, guilt, worry, and strangely enough

Rage.

What the hell was going through that hungry wizard guy's head anyway?! Making people fight to the death against their will?! At the age of twelve?!?! Giovanni bit his lip at the thought of Molly being put in that kind of situation. How the hell was that thing still in charge anyways?! They should kick him out or something!

Giovanni paused at that thought, his brain tossing it back and forth, studying it from every angle. And then, something popped into his head.

Giovanni had an idea.

It was dumb. Really dumb, even for the upcoming supervillain that ate hot coal several times. But if it helped Rick then that didn’t matter. He just wanted to make his friend happy again.

Make his minion happy again.

“Hey,” Giovanni started. Rick lifted his head up and turned to Giovanni, a wobbly grin lifting his tear-covered cheeks.

“Heh, I probably shouldn’t have said that should I?” Rick laughed mirthlessly. He grabbed both his sleeves and gripped both of them tight. Giovanni felt his heart tighten, which only increased his determination to help the wizard sitting across from him.

“This ‘He who hungers a bunch’ sounds like a real jerk,” Giovanni said with enough bitterness to show he meant it. A sound similar to a laugh lept from Rick’s throat but it was more from surprise than happiness.

“Yea, I guess you could put it that way…”

“So why should we have to listen to him?”

Rick paused, trying to take in Giovanni’s words as best he could. “What?”

“Yea! Since I’m going to become the greatest supervillain of all time! It only seems right to break a few people out of jail so they can become my fateful minions.” Giovanni replied like it was the most obvious thing in the world. Rick stared at him, confirming that it definitely was not.

“But how? He’s one of the most powerful beings in the deep. How could-”

“Damn you sound like his number one fan or something. Which is kinda weird for someone who apparently broke out of prison just to avoid him!” Rick stared at him wide-eyed. “You already broke ocean law once. Why would you bother following it now?” Rick looked down at Giovanni’s hands, struggling to form a response.

“Once I get strong enough. I’m breaking your friends out. I promise ok?” Giovanni said softly, holding out his pinky finger.

Rick looked at it carefully for a bit, like any second Giovanni was going to take it back. But the pink-haired criminal in front of him gave him a lop-sided but genuine smile instead. Rick slowly raised his hand towards it before the fingers interlocked. The string that bound both their hearts reappeared again. Black electricity travelled along the string before attaching itself to the friendship bracelet on Giovanni’s wrist. It shifted from pure black to dark pink before it disappear in a final spark of power.

“Woah… Did our demon pact get strong or something?” Giovanni stared down at his hand as it crackled with power. He held out a hand dramatically as the lighting shot out of hand. Giovanni stared at it like a kid who just got the game they wanted for Christmas. “Dude did you give me your powers!? That’s so cool!”

“Yea… Yea it is isn’t it?”

Rick gave Giovanni a worn smile. It was less wide than his normal smile but it shined bright enough to kill any tension in the air. Giovanni jumped off the bench with a silent thud.

“Well, we can’t break your friends out of prison sleep deprived right?” Giovanni barked, returning to his usual volume. “We should try and actually sleep now.” Giovanni held his hand out to Rick and the wizard took it. Following the criminal into the living room and settling into their respective sleeping bags. Giovanni shifted so he was sleeping on his stomach and started to drift off. But Rick's shuffling made him stay mostly focused on him.

“Wait,” Giovanni opened his eyes again. Looking over at Rick with some concern. “I just wanted to say that, my real name isn’t actually Rick Shades.” Giovanni looked over at him before his eyes filled with stars.

“Wait you have a crime name too?!” Giovanni shot out of his sleeping bag from excitement.

“What?”

“What?”

There was a long pause.

“Alright then, since you are now my evil minion I suppose we can tell each other our real names!” Giovanni grinned. ”My name is Giovanni Potage! Future supervillain and official cool dude. What about you?”

“...My name’s Toidei Gourami. But my friends call me Odi.” Odi smiled.

“Woah cool name! Really makes you sound like a wizard.”

Odi grinned at the compliment. “Your name makes you really seem like a supervillain,” He didn’t understand what that meant exactly but Giovanni kept mentioning it so it probably mattered a lot to him. Giovanni exaggerated his reaction, cupping his face with one hand and making a show of turning away bashfully which Rick chuckled at, nearly waking up Ben in the process.

“Well, Night Odi!” Giovanni said finally, flopping onto the cushion. He didn’t realise how tired he was until his head hit the pillow. He closed his eyes and let himself be taken by the blanket’s warmth.

“Night, Giovanni.” Was the last thing Giovanni heard before drifting into a peaceful sleep.