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A comfy chair, a large desk, a good book, and some much needed peace and quiet. Was there anything else that Angela needed?
But yet, something felt wrong. Angela just couldn’t quite put her finger on what though. It even took her a few moments before she realized that she was rereading the same page for the second time. Unable to focus on her book, Angela closed it and put it to the side.
She felt... anxious. But what about? Angela didn’t know. The Head? Couldn’t be, they were exiled into the outskirts and the Head wasn’t about to waste additional resources to try and hunt them down. There were no invitations being created either so it’s not like that could be it... If anything, the Library was more peaceful than ev-
That’s what it was.
The Library was quiet. Much too quiet.
When was the last time she talked to another Librarian outside of lessons? Must’ve been... nearly a week or so by now. Time was a bit fickle in the Library, but at the very least it was a noticeable period of time.
She thought about what she had done recently. Had she done something to offend them? Well... okay maybe she had to some of them. But Roland and friends aside, would Binah avoid her? Malkuth? Hod? Tiph? She thought she was finally getting on better terms with them, hell she even attended a tea party with Binah recently.
Pacing around her office, she tried to calm herself down. No, they’re obviously busy. They have their own assistant librarians to manage, and it was just a coincidence that they weren’t talking to her. Surely in a few days they’ll be back to making small talk and having fun again!
But wait... Angela remembered that while they were on friendlier terms recently, now that things have calmed down, maybe they’ve been thinking about old grudges... She did effectively scrap all the work they did in Lobotomy Corporation after all, something they quite literally died for.
Angela shook her head. She must be imagining things. It’s probably a coincidence. She was about to summon Malkuth to talk to, when she realized that on the 1% chance that Malkuth was really avoiding her, summoning her would just make it worse. Instead, she decided to walk to Malkuth’s floor and greet her that way.
And yet... she was nowhere to be found.
She stopped one of the assistant librarians who was dusting off some tables. “Where’s Malkuth?”
The assistant librarian stiffened at being directly addressed by Angela. “Uh... She left earlier, but I’m not sure where. Did you want me to pass a message on for you?”
“No it’s fine, thanks.”
Breathing a sigh of relief, the assistant librarian kept dusting off a table while Angela left Malkuth’s floor more confused than ever.
Angela tried Hod’s floor and got similar results.
Then she tried Tiphereth’s floor and was ALSO told she was away. Gebura’s was a similar case.
Finally, she tried Binah’s floor and the assistants told her that Binah was also away. Something was definitely up, but she just wasn’t sure what... Suddenly Angela remembered that it was time for lessons. This would be a good way to get some answers, she thought.
--
“-and that’s why our lovely, fluffy, Punishing Bird sometimes gets just a little violent!”
Malkuth finished her presentation by showcasing her small Punishing Bird replica transforming into the violent red version that the unfortunate souls who decided to hit it got to experience.
Hod gave a small clap at the end of Malkuth’s lecture. Malkuth bowed.
“Any questions? Ah yes, Angela! What do you want to know?” Malkuth pointed at Angela who had raised her hand.
“Are you avoiding me?”
An ice cold silence fell over the room. Roland, who was leaning back in his chair relaxing, almost fell over. Luckily, Yesod was there to catch Roland before he fell too far back. But even Yesod was startled at Angela’s question, and of course, so was Malktuh and Hod.
“W-w-what do you mean?” Malkuth stuttered out a reply and nervously laughed.
Angela noted the change in the atmosphere. Something was definitely suspicious about everyone’s behaviour.
“Well... It just feels like I haven’t been able to see any of you outside lessons. Anytime I visit your floors, you’re never there. I could believe this if it was just one or two days but a full week? Did I...” Angela began mumbling “did I do something to offend you?”
Malkuth immediately shook her head.
“No! You didn’t do anything wrong Angela!”
Hod jumped up to her defence too.
“Yeah, we’ve just been really busy talking about some private matters!”
“For a week? Something you couldn’t talk to me about?” Angela couldn’t hide the sadness from her voice. Hod and Malkuth both looked at each other with a guilty look.
“Well... the truth is-”
Roland looked at Yesod and they both came to a mutual understanding. Yesod quickly grabbed Hod’s arm and whispered something into her ear while Roland quite literally leapt to the front of the class. He cut off Malkuth from talking and tried to defuse the situation.
“Ahhh you know how it is Angela, everyone has one or two secrets they don’t want others to know about right? I sure as hell don’t know what they’re talking about, and if you ask me, it’s probably something dumb like their non-existent love life.”
Malkuth glared at Roland who quietly whispered back to her. Sighing, Malkuth let Roland keep talking.
“Look, nobody’s avoiding you on purpose ok Angela? I promise.”
Angela looked at Roland. A stupid idiot for sure, but more importantly... someone that she could trust. She nodded.
“Alright, if you’re willing to go that far then I’ll back off. It’s just...”
Yesod looked at Angela. “Just...?”
“Nevermind.” Angela dismissed them. She accepted that she must’ve been overthinking things. An unfortunate side effect of the many, many, years she spent alone and brooding.
Breathing a sigh of relief, Yesod, Hod, Roland, and Malkuth all gathered their belongings. However, Angela didn’t miss the guilty look Malkuth had on her face as they left their makeshift classroom on her floor.
While she felt like she could trust Roland, something still felt fishy to her.
Quietly she slipped away from the main group. There were no more lessons for the day so there was no longer a reason to travel with them. But she didn’t go back to her office, instead she decided to secretly follow them from a distance.
Of course, for someone like Angela, ensuring that nobody noticed her was quite easy. She followed them, debating which of them would be better to tail once they split off. But she found that would be unnecessary as they all ended up at Roland’s floor before the four of them slipped inside.
Strange... Much too strange... Angela made her way over to the door and tried listening in. She could faintly hear some voices, but not enough to make out what they were saying. Risking being discovered, she opened the door the tiniest of amounts, just enough to hear a bit more.
“...catching...on” She could hear Malkuth speaking more clearly now.
“We...risk...” This time it was Yesod talking.
“...feel...terrible...can’t we...” Hod sounded guilty about something, confirming Angela’s suspicions definitively.
“Just one more day ok! That’s all, then we don’t need to hide it anymore!” Roland wasn’t making an effort to be quiet at all, and Angela could hear perfectly what he was saying. He sounded frantic, desperate even. Maybe he WAS worried that she was catching on... She could hear Malkuth, Hod, and Yesod trying to shush him but the damage was done.
Closing the door quietly so as to not alert them that she was here, she walked back to her desk in complete silence.
--
As she slowly sunk down into her chair, Angela tried resuming her book. It was pointless though, since she couldn’t even read a full sentence. Closing it, she put it back down and closed her eyes.
Why? Why were they hiding something from her? And what?
She tried analysing what they could’ve been hiding from her that demanded all this secrecy. Maybe Roland wasn’t joking when he said it was about their love lives, were they maybe dating each other and were afraid to tell her? No, that can’t be it, Roland was much too in love with Angelica still, and this wasn’t even something they needed to hide from her.
What about... some internal conflict between Librarians? Did they have some big fight and are trying not to involve me in it? That’s impossible though, Angela would know if there was any fighting going on and there wasn’t anything out of the ordinary recently. Wait... that WAS suspicious... there was no fighting? None?
She tried recollecting. Normally when someone got injured, Angela would help fix them up. But in the past week, no one, not even Netzach needed help. And THAT, was definitely suspicious.
Ok, Angela thought that now was a good time to summarise all the evidence she had.
First: The other Librarians had been avoiding her. This was fact, it wasn’t just mere coincidence that she hadn’t seen anyone outside lessons in a week.
Second: Not only were they avoiding her, they were hiding something. Malkuth and Hod almost confessed, but Roland had stopped them from saying anything more.
Third: Roland said “just one more day”, which implies tomorrow something was going to happen.
Fourth: For some reason, Roland, Netzach, and Chesed have avoided being injured at all. This was perhaps the most damning piece of evidence that something was wrong.
So what did it all mean? If the idiot trio hadn’t been injured in the past week... does that mean they didn’t want them to be hurt? Did they form some sort of alliance or pact or treaty?
And what was something that they needed to hide from her... Ignoring Roland’s definitely wrong suggestion of a love life, what else could it be?
Wait... Suddenly the pieces started falling into place. If the other Librarians were forming an alliance... and it didn’t include her... there was only one logical conclusion to come to.
They were planning on rebelling. Or maybe rebelling wasn’t the right word, it’s not like she was commanding them to do anything. But regardless, they had had enough with Angela.
When Angela realised the truth, she thought she would be upset. Frustrated. Angry. Furious. Yet, she felt none of those emotions. Instead... she just felt depressed. Defeated. Why? Why wasn’t she angry at them for betraying her? Why depressed?
She suddenly remembered the conversation she had with Roland after they were thrown into the Outskirts. She remembered how she asked Roland to address her as Angela because she considered him as a... friend.
That’s why this hurt so much. Not because she was being betrayed, but because it was from who she thought were her friends.
The reasonable response to this would be to confront them, but Angela felt so lethargic after realising what had happened that she couldn’t even muster the energy to think about how to face them during the next set of lessons. Tomorrow was a day off, so at least she could just hole up in her office and hide-
“Hey Angela, got a minute?”
Roland’s familiar voice reached her ears.
She looked up from her desk to see Roland walking towards her.
“Y-yes Roland?” She couldn’t hide the surprise from her voice. She didn’t know how to face Roland knowing that secretly he was planning on betraying her.
“Hey, uh... is everything alright? You’re not looking so good, are you uhhhh... maybe bothered by earlier?”
Roland must’ve known that Angela was catching on to them. Sighing, Angela looked up. But Roland spoke first.
“Look, I’m sorry but I really can’t tell you anything. Just... Ah god, I’m going about this all wrong.” Roland sighed and awkwardly put his hands in his pocket. “Damn it, why am I the one doing this...” he muttered to himself.
“Do you have some time tomorrow? I wanted to talk to you about something on my floor. Just come up around let’s say... noon? How’s that sound?”
This must’ve been when and where they were planning on confronting her. Well... even if they clearly didn’t think of her as a friend, the least she could do was see what they wanted. Maybe there was a chance she could negotiate some terms with them so that they could at least separate on amicable terms.
Angela nodded. “Sure, that sounds fine. I’ll see you tomorrow then.”
“Great!” Roland broke out into a big smile. Must have been relieved that Angela agreed so easily. “I’ll see you then, bye!” and he rushed out.
Watching Roland as he slowly faded away, Angela remembered the last time she felt this way. It was when she first gained consciousness, and saw Ayin for the first time. That feeling of loneliness and despair of being rejected by someone who you cared about...
Stop. Angela forced herself to move on. As Roland would put it, that’s that, and this is this. She chuckled. It’s fine, she thought to herself. She would just face the music tomorrow, and whatever happens... happens.
--
Angela found herself dragging her feet as she slowly climbed the Library’s staircase. She could’ve teleported herself to Roland’s floor, but she wanted to take her time. It might be the last time she can take such a leisurely walk after all.
But no matter how slowly she walked, she knew that she would eventually find herself in front of the set of doors that may be the end of everything. She took a deep breath. And then she knocked.
“A-Angela? Aren’t you a bit early?”
Roland’s surprised voice came from the otherside of the door.
“Didn’t you ask me to come at noon?”
“Well yeah but... Uh can you give us- I mean me a couple more minutes? I’ll be quick, promise! Just don’t come inside until I tell you to!” Roland practically shouted before Angela could hear him frantically run.
Sighing and without anything better to do, Angela sat down.
She remembered how she first met Roland, this unknown man who suddenly appeared in her Library. She recalled how harsh she had treated him, and how stupid and foolish she felt he was. But she knew that deep down he and her were not so different.
When Angela had learned that she was responsible for Angelica’s death, she felt like the air had been sucked out of her lungs. What could she possibly say or do for Roland to forgive her?
Thus it would’ve been no surprise to her if Roland had decided to kill her when she had finally become human. But against all expectations, he forgave her. Much like how Angela had forgiven Roland, Roland also chose to forgive her.
And yet, why now? Why were Roland and the remaining Librarians betraying her now? Angela couldn’t fathom it, and the more she thought about it the sadder and more depressed she became.
She checked her internal clock, 15 minutes had passed. Regardless of whether she could believe it or not, the truth was the truth. She stood up and walked over to the door once more.
Knock.
Her hand felt heavy.
Knock.
Did... Did it really have to end?
Knock.
The door slowly creaked open. Roland was nowhere to be seen. The floor was entirely dark. Did they plan to ambush her? She momentarily thought about just turning around and leaving, but that wouldn’t fix anything. Should she fight back? Sure she might’ve been all powerful in the Library, but... could she even fight back? No, she couldn’t. Even when she had previously hurt Roland in the past, there was a mutual understanding between them but now... Now there wouldn’t be.
Slowly, she took a step in. Then another. Still nothing. Anxiety growing in her, she decided to call out to them.
“Hello?”
Suddenly all the lights turned on at once. Blinded, Angela shielded her eyes. She heard some loud bangs and braced for pain. But it never came.
Slowly, Angela’s eyes adjusted and she was finally able to look forward. She saw a myriad of colours, a banner with text that she couldn’t read clearly, and is that... Cake?
“What is go-” She began to raise a question before being interrupted by a chorus of voices.
“HAPPY BIRTHDAY ANGELA!”
Finally her eyes were able to fully adjust and she noticed that the banner had written in large letters “Happy Birthday Angela!” in pretty lettering.
She saw every one of the patron Librarians holding what appeared to be conical shaped object, and wasn’t sure what it was supposed to be until she felt ribbons landing on her.
Stunned, she stood there in silence.
Malkuth looked at Roland. “I told you this wasn’t going to work!”
“I wasn’t even the one who suggested this! You did!”
“I-” Malkuth stuttered for a second. “Well I thought everyone liked surprise parties!”
“Can... can we just eat and drink now...?” Netzach weakly spoke up.
“No! We have to at least talk to Angela first!” Hod reprimanded Netzach.
“It would be poor manners for us to eat before the guest of honour.” Binah spoke while Hokma nodded with her.
“...Did you all forget Angela can’t eat?” Tiphereth put her face in her hands. “We can at least take the time to make her feel welcomed right?”
Yesod nodded. “Right, Chesed, can you help with that?”
Chesed looked at Yesod with an incredulous look on his face. “You want me to welcome Angela?”
Gebura twitched. “Can one of you just hurry up and do something? We’re standing here like idiots while Angela is just watching!”
“Alright alright fine! I’ll do it!” Roland spoke up and took charge. “Hey! Who the hell’s laughing! This isn’t funn-”
Roland turned to see where the laughing was coming from, only to see Angela doubled over with her hand over her mouth trying not to laugh. Of course her hand could only do so much and muffled sounds still escaped now and then. Noticing that they had stopped arguing and was looking at her, she made no attempt to hide her laughter.
What the hell was she thinking? Roland and everyone betraying her? It made no sense, not even from the start. She had completely forgotten all about her birthday, and it was so in character of everyone to go about it this way that she just couldn’t help but laugh.
“Hey uh...” Roland slowly walked up to her. “You alright?” He gently asked, staying at a safe distance away in case Angela decided to choose violence for whatever reason.
“Alright? I’m more than alright Roland, great even!” Uncharacteristically of her, Angela displayed pure joy on her face. Perhaps it was the fact that she was so low before this, but right now she felt nothing but happiness and relief that all her assumptions were wrong.
“Thank you everyone! I had completely forgotten about my birthday!”
The remaining Librarians were stunned. But most ended up smiling, relieved that everything had (mostly) gone according to plan.
Relieved, Roland took the opportunity to pat Angela on the back.
“Now that we’ve sorted things out, let me say it again. Happy Birthday Angela.”
Angela looked at Roland.
“Thank you Roland.”
--
The party was well underway. While Angela unfortunately couldn’t participate in eating any of the food or drink, she took great satisfaction in watching the other Librarians eat.
“Doesn’t it feel weird to be eating our own celebratory food we made for someone who can’t even eat it...?” Tiphereth brought up quietly to Malkuth.
“It’s ok! Look how happy Angela is! We’ve gotta eat enough for both us and her!”
Angela smiled and nodded. While she couldn’t eat the food, she found it entertaining to watch the rest eat. All in all, it was a fantastic party, more than anything Angela could have dreamed of.
Hod greeted Angela with a small wave. “Sorry, we never meant to exclude you but we didn’t want to give away the surprise...” Sheepishly Hod took a bite out of some cake on her plate. “We thought the best way to do that was just to not talk to you, but I think we ended up doing more harm than good.”
“It’s alright, I was just...” Angela didn’t know if she wanted to confess she was lonely or not.
“Lonely?” Hokma finished her sentence for her. Angela sighed, and nodded.
“I had thought that maybe you had all gotten fed up with me. That your old grudges had resurfaced and that you no longer wanted to have anything to do with me, so... yeah. I was lonely.”
“Aw... Angela...” Hod patted her head. Angela didn’t rebuke her, the sensation was pleasing.
Seeing Angela sulking a little, Binah approached her and sat next to her. “I told you, did I not? I would see where your path leads no matter where you go, for better or for worse.” Angela felt her cheeks flush a tiny amount.
“Oh ho~ what’s this? Is someone getting a little shy?” Chesed teased Angela a little before Yesod quickly kicked his shins.
Angela felt blessed to be surrounded by such wonderful people. In all the million years she had spent isolated, she never would’ve guessed how wonderful it would have felt to have people who actually cared for her.
“Attention, attention!” Roland’s voice echoed around the room. “Now that we’ve all had our fill and mingled with merry, let’s get down to the most important part of the day!”
Angela looked at Roland with a quizzical look. The other Librarians, realizing what he meant, began pulling out variously shaped items, all of which were wrapped.
“That’s right, it’s gift giving time! Now Angela, would you mind stepping over here for a moment?”
Not seeing a reason to refuse, Angela nodded and walked over to Roland. Roland was standing near a table with a singular chair at the head of it. He pulled the chair back and gestured for Angela to sit down. After he confirmed that Angela was comfortable in her chair, he began addressing the rest of the Librarians who had lined up on the other side of the room.
“Alright, I think to make things a bit more interesting, let’s have each Librarian come up one at a time to present their gift to Angela! That way exactly what we think of our dear director will be brought to light!” He bowed with a dramatic flourish before taking his spot at the end of the line.
Angela suddenly felt nervous. What kind of gifts would they have prepared for her? Should she act excited even if it was something she didn’t want? Or should she be honest? She thought of Netzach and what he might’ve prepared, nothing good probably. But regardless, she was content with what had already transpired, and prepared herself to act happy no matter what.
Malkuth excitedly bounced her way up to Angela’s table. With a sparkle in her eye, she presented Angela with a box that looked to be about the size of her torso. Excitedly, she pushed it forward and looked expectantly at Angela.
Swallowing, Angela could feel the pressure of everyone’s eyes on her. She slowly unwrapped the present to find a box. Malkuth nodded as Angela opened the box and took out what was inside.
It was soft, cuddly, and... bear shaped?
At first she was reminded of Happy Teddy Bear, but... it was softer and much, much friendlier.
“This is-” Angela began to speak but Malkuth cut her off
“A teddy bear! Isn’t it cute!”
Angela nodded. It certainly was very cute. She gave it a light squeeze, and it felt warm... Wait...
“I tried imbuing it with a bit of Scorched Girl’s ego so that it would stay warm, I hope you like it!”
“I-, yes I love it, thank you Malkuth.” Angela made a mental note to keep an eye on it to make sure that it didn’t combust into flames. She watched Malkuth walk back with a smile on her face, and Angela set the teddy bear to the side.
Next up it was Yesod’s turn. He walked up and pulled what looked like a small box out of his pocket, to which Chesed gasped at. Yesod turned and glared at Chesed, while Angela simply raised her eyebrow at Yesod.
“I’m flattered Yesod but-”
“No, no! It’s not what it looks like!” Yesod hurriedly unwrapped his gift and put it in front of Angela.
“Uh-”
“Just open it already!” Yesod was uncharacteristically flustered. He swore to never package gifts in small boxes again.
Cautiously picking the box up, Angela opened it to find what appeared to be... a set of dice?
Yesod coughed. “I was wondering if you would be uh, interested in a game of Ruins and Abnormalities. But I figured you didn’t have a set of dice to play so...” He tapered off, and looked to the side to try and hide his embarrassment.
Angela smiled, he must’ve known that she wanted to join in at times but was too embarrassed to do so. “I would love to, thank you Yesod.”
As Yesod walked back, Chesed took the opportunity to get down on one knee in front of Roland. Playing along, Roland covered his mouth with his hands and nodded, causing Yesod to glare at both of them. Angela giggled while she watched Chesed get up and wrap Roland in a tug embrace, all the while holding back their laughter. Yesod would never live this down.
After Yesod glared angrily at Chesed and Roland, Hod took the opportunity to give her gift to Angela. She walked up and pulled out a nicely wrapped gift.
“Here Angela, I hope you like it!”
Smiling, Angela unwrapped the gift. Opening the box that contained the gift, she saw a fountain pen that was beautifully decorated with gold. Next to the pen was a journal with the Library drawn on it.
“I figured with all the reading you did, you would be able to write a wonderful book of your own! Or, you could use it as a diary!”
“Hm... that is an interesting proposition. Perhaps the patron Librarian of literature would be able to help proofread what I write then.”
Hod beamed. “Gladly!”
“Thank you Hod, I think it would be nice to write a book. What is it that stories always say? ‘The real book was the one we made along the way’?”
Giggling, Hod returned to join the rest of the Librarians. She hurried over and helped Malkuth with separating Yesod from Chesed, the latter of which was being strangled. Roland was doubled over with laughter, while the rest of the Librarians paid them no mind. Netzach however, was feeling quite nervous.
Sluggishly, Netzach walked up. Angela watched him as he took out what appeared to be... a fairly large bag from behind his back. Not sure what to expect, Angela kept quiet.
Netzach took deep breaths then placed it in front of Angela.
“Um...”
“Uh...”
They both awkwardly stared at each other.
“Should I... open it?”
Netzach nodded. She grabbed the bag and pulled the string tying it closed. She reached inside and grabbed a soft, large, and... fluffy object? Another stuffed animal?
Pulling it out, what Angela found wasn’t an animal, but a large pillow.
“I wasn’t sure if you would like it, though I can guarantee its comfort even if you don’t sleep with it.”
Netzach quickly turned around and began walking back. He felt his face flush and didn’t want Angela to realize how nervous he was.
On the other hand, Angela was pleasantly surprised. If there was a Librarian whose gift she’d have to pretend to like, she was sure it was going to be Netzach’s. But perhaps, she didn’t give Netzach enough credit because she genuinely thought it was very kind of him to gift her a pillow. While true that she didn’t need to sleep, it was still very comfortable, and a very Netzach-esque gift to give.
“Thank you Netzach. I’ll make sure to use it often!” She shouted at Netzach as he began walking back. In response to her words, he waved his hand.
Now that the lower floors of the Library had finished giving their gifts, it was now the middle layer’s turn. Tiphereth walked over to a corner of the room where she had placed her gift for safe keeping. She picked up a large rectangular wrapped gift and began walking over to Angela before stumbling and almost dropping it. Hokma walked over to try and offer some help, but Tiphereth swatted away at his hand.
Eventually, Tiphereth was able to place the gift in front of Angela. Catching her breath, she raised her hand and signalled Angela that she needed a moment. Angela nodded, and once again wasn’t sure what this gift would be.
“Here.” With a flush on her face and some embarrassment in her voice, she placed her gift next to Angela. “Do you uh... do you have to open it here?”
“Well... That’s the point isn’t it?”
Tiphereth sighed. She looked back at Netzach, who nodded. He seemed to mouth some words at her, but Angela wasn’t sure what he was trying to say. “Okay...” She sheepishly began walking back before Angela could open it. Confused by her reaction, Angela began unwrapping the gift.
As she began peeling it back, she understood why she was talking with Netzach. It was a beautifully framed drawing of Angela and Tiphereth holding hands, similar to what a kid would draw and show their parents, but much more detailed. She smiled, mimicking the same smile that the Angela in the photo had held.
“This is a beautiful drawing Tiphereth, thank you.”
Tiphereth blushed and nodded. Roland opened his mouth to presumably tease her, but Netzach quickly covered his mouth. As her teacher he wasn’t about to let Roland ruin her moment. He remembered how Tiphereth approached him about her idea for Angela’s gift. Never in a million years had he expected Tiphereth of all people to ask him for help. Of course, he wasn’t going to turn her down, and after hours of practice and work, he was proud of what Tiphereth had drawn.
After Tiphereth had taken her place back in line, Gebura snubbed out her cigarette and walked with confidence up to Angela. She pulled out a long cylindrical shaped object and placed it down in front of Angela. Chesed felt a chill go down his spine as he recognized what the object was.
Wordlessly, Gebura walked back. Angela began unwrapping the gift to find what appeared to be a bat. Suddenly she realized what Gebura had given her and began laughing. She picked up the bat and admired how light it felt. She pointed it towards Chesed who had been nervously sweating and watched as he instinctively flinched.
Gebura smiled. “Sometimes getting up and personal is better than just using your powers all the time. Hope you get some use out of it.”
Angela nodded. “Thank you Gebura, I’ll make sure to use it caringly and...” looking at Chesed directly “only when needed.” Her smile struck fear into Chesed’s heart who unfortunately was also next.
Gulping, Chesed made his way up to Angela’s desk who was smiling. While she was genuinely happy and pleased, Chesed could only interpret it as a smile dripping with venom.
“H-hey Angela, hope you’re having a good time haha!” He nervously laughed, distinctly aware of the bat next to her.
“Yes Chesed I am, thank you for asking. I really appreciate everyone giving me gifts, I had never thought birthdays could be so fun.”
Nodding, Chesed presented her his own gift. It was a strange shape, not exactly cubical, and rather largely sized. Not sure what to make of it, Angela began unwrapping it to reveal something she had seen before plenty of times on Chesed’s floor.
“Is this... a coffee maker?”
Chesed nodded.
“For someone who can’t drink coffee...?”
Chesed nodded again, albeit much slower.
Angela raised her eyebrows at Chesed.
“Wait, wait, let me explain! Drinking coffee is only one part of the process, making coffee is a whole other experience! The feeling of grinding beans, the slow dripping, simply the act of brewing coffee is soothing. Plus, I would be glad to taste test and help you with brewing the perfect cup of coffee.” Chesed tried smiling at the end but his fear of being beaten showed on his face.
Angela laughed. “I’ll have to give it a try then, thank you Chesed. I’ll hold you up to that, and I hope you’ll accept the honour of tasting the first cup of coffee I make.”
Relieved that Angela was pleased with his gift, he breathed out a sigh of relief and took his place back in line.
Finally, it was time for the last set of Librarians. Without much ceremony, Binah made her way up to Angela’s desk. She placed down a teacup in front of her and waited.
“Um... is this your gift?” Angela questioned Binah.
Binah nodded. “I specially created it with you in mind.”
Angela picked up the teacup to examine it. It was certainly different from the other teacups on Binah’s floor. It was adorned with a design that seemed to mimic books, fitting for a Library director she supposed.
“It’s lovely Binah, thank you. I’ll make sure it’s on my desk so I can always look at it.”
“I insist that you use it.”
Angela was taken aback. Surely Binah knew that she was incapable of eating or drinking.
“Well, I’d love to but-”
Binah shook her head. “Don’t worry, I’m sure you’ll get the chance to.” and walked back.
What did Binah know that she didn’t? Angela watched as Binah quietly took her place next to Hokma. Regardless of whether she could use it or not, it was a very pretty gift.
Similar to Binah, Hokma walked up without much ceremony. He pulled out a circular object and placed it in front of Angela. Angela picked up the gift, it was light. She began unwrapping it and found what appeared to be a metallic disk. On the cover was an intricate design resembling a page from a book.
“Press the button on the right and it’ll open.” Hokma pointed out a tiny knob.
Pressing it, the disk opened and revealed a clock. “Ah, a pocket watch! Thank you Hokma, this will make it easier to keep track of how often people are slacking off.” She looked in Roland’s direction who was avoiding her gaze.
“You’re welcome, I figured it was TIME you got a watch after all.”
Silence. Angela didn’t know how to react. The extra emphasis Hokma put on time clearly meant that it was an intended joke and not a coincidence. But Hokma of all people to make a joke, let alone such a lame one like that? Should she laugh? She looked up at Hokma who was clearly expecting a response.
Luckily for her, Roland had made the first move.
“Time? Watch? PFF-” Roland started laughing. “That was so lame, oh my god, Hokma I get you’re the oldest one here but to make a Dad joke like that- oh my god I can’t breathe.”
Hokma coughed and began walking back. Angela thought she could catch a glimpse of red in his cheeks, but she wasn’t able to confirm it.
After having recovered from laughing, Roland walked over and took on his announcer voice.
“And with that, I think we can all call Angela’s birthday a success! Thank you everyone for showing up, and thank you Angela for having brought us all together. We can’t thank you enough for all your efforts!”
Angela looked quizzically at Roland. The other Librarians did the same.
“Hm?” Roland looked at everyone. “What?”
Hokma took this time to speak up. “Aren’t you forgetting one last gift?”
“Who?”
“Yours.”
Roland laughed, “Ah, I seem to have forgotten mine! I’ll just give it to Angela later, don’t worry about it.”
“Hold on, you think you can stand there in line and laugh at the rest of us while not giving your own gift? No way, you’re giving your gift right now in front of everyone.” Yesod was clearly still upset over earlier.
“Oh, come on Yesod, it’s nothing big, just a small little token of appreciation. It’s not worth the effort of-”
“Did you mean this gift you forgot?” Gebura pulled out a box from the corner of the room.
“Where the- I mean, no that’s not it, uhhh that’s uh....”
“You really don’t want to give me a gift Roland...?” Angela looked up at Roland with a sad look. Of course she wasn’t actually sad, but she was extremely curious as to what Roland would give her. She knew that if Roland said he would give it to her later, he would, but she wanted to see everyone’s reaction at the same time.
“I-, alright fine! Yes, that’s my gift, let me go grab it- hey! Don’t throw it!” But it was too late as Gebura flung the gift at Roland. Barely able to catch it, Roland breathed a sigh of relief once he saw it was undamaged.
“Look uh... just... don’t laugh, okay?” He placed it in front of Angela.
Curious as to what it could be, Angela took care to unwrap it without damaging the contents. As she finished unwrapping it, she gasped.
“Is this...”
Roland nodded. Scratching his head, Roland began to blush. “I told you right? That I would let you read my book once I finished writing it? Well... I did, so here it is.”
Angela opened up the cover. There was a blank spot for presumably where the title would go. She flipped to the next page. It was an acknowledgements and thanks page. It said:
“A sincere and heartfelt thanks to all my fellow Librarians who had helped me in the creation of this book. While they may not have had a hand in directly writing portions of this book, my time with them is what helped fill this book with many happy memories. In addition, I’d like to thank my late wife Angelica, as well as all my other friends from the City. On the off chance some of you are able to read this, thank you all for putting up with me, and I sincerely hope that one day we can meet again.
Finally, but certainly not least, thank you Angela. While you may have brutally maimed me the first time we met, in addition to beating the shit out of me multiple times, I am extremely proud to have the honour of calling you my friend. Thank you.”
Angela looked up at Roland. He met her eyes.
“Happy birthday Angela.”
Angela felt overwhelmed. She thought of all the pain she went through helping Ayin realize his goals, all the suffering she had to watch, all the guilt she bore as she viciously turned people into books... was it okay for her to feel this happy? This blessed? Her vision blurred as she looked back at the book in her hands.
“I’m not that good at writing and it’s really rough but... hey! This is the only copy, don’t cry- Wait... Angela?”
All the other Librarians had also noticed something strange. They all tried to get a glimpse as to what was happening. Was Angela... crying?
Crying? Angela looked down. She noticed some wet spots on the page, and when she touched her face, her fingers were damp. She was crying...?
“Holy shit.” Roland couldn’t hide his surprise.
Angela looked at Binah. Binah nodded, and poured tea (where did she even pull that teapot from?) into the teacup she had gifted Angela. Hands shaking, she raised the cup to her lips and poured a small amount into her mouth.
“It’s... delicious.” Words she never thought she would say.
The Librarians erupted in cheers. Malkuth embraced Angela, and Angela could finally feel what people meant by a deathly tight hug. After the cheers died down and Angela was released, she looked at Roland.
“What were you going to call the book? That’s that and this is this?” She was half joking with Roland, as she knew that was one of his favourite phrases.
“Nah, I was thinking about it, but I think I know a better one now.” Roland pulled out a pen from his pocket and began writing something down on the title page. Satisfied with his work, he passed the book to Angela. Upon seeing the page, Angela warmly smiled. Written in somewhat messy handwriting, was a phrase that meant a lot to both Angela and Roland.
That’s This, and This is That.