Work Text:
It is the last month of Jisung’s summer before his graduating year as a BS Psych student. He should be thinking of his thesis that has no progress since their school vacation started aside from revising it on their Professor’s advice. Yet, he spends his remaining time outside of his thesis reading books, webtoons, and manga or watching Korean dramas and animes. Jisung thinks he might as well have fun and enjoy the whole month of May before going to the pits of hell that is 1st semester of 4th year where they will finalize and defend their thesis.
That’s what he plans but when did fate and all gods and saints or maybe even devils ever side with him?
Jisung wakes up one weekend before the first day of May to the news broken to him by his mother via call. His aunt, his mom’s biological sister, asks her if her son and her son’s friend can stay in our house for the whole month for their internship here in the province. The Park’s bungalow residence made out of woods is inherited by Jisung’s father from his parents before they passed away and since they are living in the city now for as long as Jisung remembers, the said residence turns into a summer house a few years ago.
Jisung loves it so much. So much so that he visits the place every school breaks or even just three days, with his mother and eventually alone when he’s old enough to travel on his own. Jisung loves the serenity from the chirp of the birds, the waves of the sea visible from his room, the breeze that is absolutely cooler than the city air because of the trees surrounding their place, and most especially the comforting silence enveloping the whole once the sun sets.
When they are not using it, they lend it to their relatives when they just want to spend time by the beach. The summer house has four bedrooms, enough to accommodate a large number of guests. So, Jisung’s mom has no reason to decline the request of her older sister, much to his dismay.
Good thing his mom will be coming over for two weeks to check on them because leaving a hundred-year-old house in the hands of three male young adult is a risk his mom will never take.
His cousin, Sungchan, arrives first on the night of May 1. He informs that his friend, who is also his classmate, will come tomorrow instead because of some personal commitments. Sungchan is a year older than Jisung but he was only born five months after the former, so they treat each other more like friends rather than Hyung and Dongsaeng. Because he is the only cousin of Jisung that is close to his age, they grew up pretty close, playing together whenever little Jisung comes home for vacation. Then puberty hits and Jisung grows into this shy and awkward teenage boy while Sungchan remains to be the friendly and outgoing kid he was. So yeah, they kinda drift apart.
After hi s and hello s, the how are you s, long time no see s, and small catch-ups, Sungchan asks if he can use the kitchen to cook dinner for them with the ingredients that he bought along the way. His cousin is taking up culinary and so is his friend, and they are here at the seaside to intern at a famous seafood restaurant of a five-star hotel. So, of course, Jisung and his mom will not miss the opportunity to taste the meal made by the future chef of the family.
The next day comes and Jisung wakes earlier than usual (not of his own volition). Since the walls are made out of wood, Jisung can hear the sound of his mother and Sungchan laughing, a little loud for someone who just woke up. He knows now that this month is not off to a great, nor even good, start. Both his mom and cousin notice the grumpy look on his face when he comes out of his room, and they just laugh at his distress.
“Hey, sorry for waking you so early. Hope this breakfast compensates for the inconvenience, my prince.” Sungchan teases the younger as he leads him to the dining room where Jisung thinks the American Breakfast - pancakes, french toast, bacon, sausage, and scrambled egg - prepared individually on the table is enough to amend. The nod and the side-eye he gives to Sungchan show he approves.
Sungchan hurryingly left as Jisung was eating, saying he was already running late for picking up his friend from the airport. His cousin adds that the said friend has very short patience, and Jisung already doesn’t like that guy. Jisung thinks that once that friend acts up in his place, he’ll surely hear from him.
It’s past 10 in the morning when the doorbell goes off and he begrudgingly heads out of his room and to the gate. Jisung sees an unfamiliar yet the most beautiful face he has ever seen, and he’s friends with Na Jaemin, a member of a famous boy group, so it says a lot. As Jisung approaches the gate, the beautiful man sees him and faces him, making eye contact. This gets Jisung’s tongue stuck on the roof of his mouth and stomach flipping upside down. He thinks it is impossible but the other’s snowy white skin (dang, he’s really white as snow) is shimmering under the harsh rays of the sun. Then he beams as if they have known each other for a long time. Jisung finds the side of the stranger’s eye wrinkles cute. Jisung cannot help but liken the other to a cat, to a sweet and clingy adorable cat, and he doesn’t even like pets.
Sungchan suddenly jumps from the side as Jisung unlocks the gate. He knows his cousin witnesses him gawking at his friend but thank God he didn’t say anything.
“Jisungie, this is Chenle. Zhong Chenle,” Chenle smiles even bigger that his eyes are disappearing, and Jisung cannot help but to smile back, “and this is my cousin, Jisung. Park Jisung.”
“Thank you for letting us stay in your house.” Just when Jisung thinks the other is already perfect, Chenle possesses an angelic voice. No, Jisung doesn’t know what angels sound like but this seems to be it.
“It’s my mom’s house so, thank her. Not me.”
That’s how the first and last interaction, it seems, between Jisung and Chenle. Jisung is originally an awkward and shy kid around strangers, but he warms up as more time passes by, and will be the goofiest friend you can ever have. That is if he does not find the other attractive and the the circus who decides to settle down in his stomach stops performing. So, Jisung only comes out of his room during mealtime and when their internship begins, he only sees the two over dinner.
Over dinner, Chenle cracks the funniest joke reducing all of them, his mother especially, to a mess. During this time, Jisung can act all casual and normal, laughing along with others, making small talk with Chenle, sharing about himself, and learning about the other. It’s easy to be less awkward when he has familiar people around him, which in this case are his mom and Sungchan. Having them in the room keeps him grounded every time he feels a pair of eyes on him and confirms it when he catches Chenle as if he’s waiting for him to look back then smiling before he turns to others.
One instance is when they are done having dinner. Jisung stands to take the dirty dishes to the sink, without breaking a plate. He is clumsy, yes but no, he doesn’t break a plate every time he touches them. However, Chenle volunteers before relenting when Jisung insists, reasoning that they are their visitors. Jisung knows the older is watching him making him conscious, and when he’s conscious, he makes a mess.
Jisung is refilling the water bottle from their gallon of mineral water, listening to his mom and Sungchan talking, still at the dinner table with Chenle, when the bottle slips from his hand, water spilling on the floor. What surprises him is Chenle appearing beside him in a second and Jisung is sure it’s because his eyes are on him, checking if he’s okay then leaves when Jisung nods only to return, carrying a mop, telling him to step aside.
“Clumsy one, aren’t you?” Jisung rolls his eyes at the other.
“I can clean my mess, you know?” Jisung crosses his arms on his chest, trying not to pout.
“I know. I just wanna help you.” Chenle whispers, eyes glued on his, staring intently, shaking Jisung’s world.. He turns to check if the others heard Chenle but his mom and Sungchan resume talking to each other. Chenle sees him checking the surroundings, smirking at Jisung when he looks back at him, eyes as wide as a saucer.
“Then clean it up yourself.” The taller counters, spinning on his heels to leave for the kitchen. From then on, Jisung hopes he won’t find himself alone with Chenle. Not because his presence annoys him, but because he knows he’ll catch some unnecessary feelings for the other.
And summer romance, a short stint, is not for Jisung.
It’s the first weekend of Sungchan and Chenle in Park’s summer house when the inevitable day finally comes. Jisung knows he cannot avoid being alone with Chenle for the whole month, but he doesn’t expect it to come this soon.
Friday night, Sungchan suggests they watch a movie he downloaded back at his home. Unfortunately, since the place is a bit old, so are the appliances and the TV in the living room doesn’t even have a USB port. Their DVD player has a USB port but it broke down last summer and they never bothered to replace it. Since the millennials and Gen Z use their gadgets to watch Netflix or downloaded movies while the older generation prefer to watch local TV dramas, Jisung’s parents choose not to upgrade the appliances. Sungchan and Chenle only bring their iPad so Jisung half-heartedly offers his 17-inch laptop, hoping his cousin can catch the tone in his voice but either Sungchan ignores it or he is just that naive.
On the brighter side, this can be a way for Jisung to shake off the awkwardness in him around Sungchan, especially with Chenle.
Jisung takes the solo couch, a few steps away from his room. Sungchan sits on the other solo couch after setting up the movie on his laptop, to be played after Chenle returns from his restroom trip. Mrs. Park lounges on the long couch, though she doesn’t plan to stay longer as her bedtime comes earlier since she’s a bit older now. There’s only one spot left, and that’s the ottoman between the solo couches. It’s clear as daylight that it’s going to be Chenle’s spot. Jisung keeps his eye on his phone, avoiding Chenle’s curious gaze as he takes the seat beside him. If only Jisung knows the first night that this isn’t the last of their movie night and this is going to be their permanent sitting arrangement, he would have suggested a better one. One where he is sitting feet away from Chenle, who keeps leaning on his side instead of Sungchan’s and occasionally whispering to him about the movie they are watching.
Jisung has a sensitive nose and rhinitis allergy thus doesn’t use perfume or any scented stuff, but he drifts to guys and girls that smell so nice and clean, using perfumes that aren’t strong or screams perfume. So try as he much, Jisung cannot keep his distance from Chenle. He knows the other is using perfume, and from what he smells, it surely is an expensive one. The slight smell of antiseptic mixed with a bit of ocean breeze entrances and distracts Jisung at the same time. Like one of these days, Jisung feels like he will just find himself burying his nose in that spot connecting Chenle’s neck and shoulder.
Another thing that distracts Jisung from watching is the constant brushing of their fingers. He’s not intentionally doing it, that’s for sure. Though he cannot say the same with Chenle. He’s not assuming, okay? Sometimes, both of their arms are crossed against their chest and Jisung can feel the other drumming his fingers on the armrest of his couch, which brushes with his. So, he’s not intentionally brushing his fingers against Jisung’s but his fingers are moving, you get it.
Lastly, it’s either Chenle is not fond of movies or he is just so tired from their internship, but he keeps dozing off sometimes during the movie and since he’s leaning on Jisung’s side, his head drops numerous times on his shoulder.
Jisung feels like he had just fallen asleep when he hears his phone ringing. He blindly searches for his phone with his hand and opens one eye only to check the caller ID. He jolts up, scrubbing his eyes and checking his phone again to make sure he’s seeing it right. Then the ringing stops for a second before it rings again. It is the same person that kept him awake all night.
“Hel–”
“Zhong Chenle. Do you know what time is it? Huh?”
“I know, but I have to go out, remember?” Jisung can barely hear the other as Chenle is whispering, careful not to wake others but didn’t mind calling him before the sun even rises.
“And I remember leaving the key on the coffee table for you. I even showed you which one of them is for the gate’s padlock.”
“Yeah…” Chenle trails off and only the clanking of the keys can be heard from the other line.
“You forgot which one is it.” The older startles hearing Jisung live instead of from his phone. Chenle gives him an apologetic eye smile as the latter approaches him, snatching the keyring from his hands, and walks past him. Chenle quietly follows him, nodding as Jisung shows him the key to the padlock and patiently waits as he unlocks it.
Jisung intends to just return to his room without speaking as his sleep-deprived brain cannot form a coherent thought or sentence without sounding like an idiot. Then, Chenle surprises him by blocking his way with his arm, hands gently gripping his shoulder to turn him to face him. The older ruffles his hair.
“How are you this cute when you just woke up, Jisungie?” Then he just left Jisung to slowly turn to the color of a tomato.
Did you just blush, Jisung? says the message Jisung receives after returning to his room. With no one else besides him in his room, he lets himself smile.
You wish. I don’t blush that easily, Chenle, the message Jisung sends after so many revisions. He hates that he’s turning into a mess just because of someone he knows for a week. He throws the phone back on top of his bedside table and sleeps again, only to feel a pang of disappointment when he receives no reply.
On their second week of internship, Jisung hears that the two are assigned to two different teams with different schedules. Sungchan will be scheduled MWF from 8 in the morning until 6 in the evening while Chenle’s schedule is Monday to Friday 8:00 AM to 12:00 NN and 3:00 PM until 6:00 PM. Then, Jisung’s mom decides to go back to the city because she’s a responsible working mother. Since everyone is going to be busy now (yes, even Jisung and his thesis), she will only visit every Friday to replenish their grocery stock and drive back every Sunday morning.
All of this seems like Heaven’s elaborate plan to get Jisung and Chenle home alone. Jisung is still holing up in his room for the first two days of this newly fucked-up setup but the awareness of the lone presence outside his room resides at the forefront of his brain, making him hyper-aware in his own safe space instead of relaxing.
Thinking Jisung beats the gods by staying in his room, his aircon breaks down, forcing him to stay by the porch where the ocean breeze is a bit chilly rather than being toasted in his room. This time he expects Chenle to interact with him as he always does.
“Oh? Jisung. I thought I saw you leave. When did you return?” Chenle sits in the doorway, crouching to tie his shoes. He’s wearing their uniform of a white polo shirt and black pants. His hair is also wet from showering which goes to prove Chenle is indeed a hygienic person. Who wastes their three-hour break on a shower when you can just sleep instead?
The breeze blows and Jisung gets a whiff of Chenle’s perfume.
“About 15 minutes ago, I guess. I strolled by the shore and I haven’t gone inside yet.”
“Why?
“It’s like a furnace inside, and the aircon in my room is still not fixed.”
“Do you want me to fix it?” Chenle gets on his feet, in position to head inside on Jisung’s signal but Jisung only gives him a ridiculous look.
“Don’t make me laugh. Aren’t you running late?”
The older squats down beside him, leveling with his eye, and in a childlike tone, he speaks, “I had a dream…” Jisung laughs so loud, his hand covering his mouth as he trashes his body around the wooden bench.
“Are you nuts? What are you? Crazy?” Jisung asks in between his laughs.
“Making you laugh.” Slowly, the laughter dies down and Jisung can only hear his heart skipping a beat as he stares back.
“Your gummy smile is so beautiful.”
If Chenle lingers for a bit, maybe he could have heard Jisung's litany of profanities.
“Believe me, he’s flirting with you,” is the first thing that Jaemin says after he tells him about Chenle for the first time. Good timing that Jaemin’s group just finishes their promotions because Jisung has only Jaemin to talk about Chenle. “Also, I know you like him too. Hep! Don’t you dare lie to me. It’s clear as the sea there. Your eyes are twinkling while you talk about him.”
“I did not.” Jisung denies.
“Okay. I know you’re the type to prefer personality over physical appearance, but why are you being awkward around a handsome guy like him? It’s so not you.” Jisung has nothing to object, your honor, because he himself doesn’t know the answer. “I’m not gonna stop you. Actually, I’d say go for it. When else can you have a summer romance, right? Just be careful though, Jisung. There’s a reason it is called summer romance.”
Even without Mrs. Park, they continue with their movie nights and the sitting arrangement remains the same, leaving the long couch vacant. Sometimes they watch two movies a night if they start earlier.
After Jisung’s video call with his best friend, it is harder for him to focus on the movie. Not only that, he can feel Chenle’s eyes on him and their hands are so close to each other. Jisung’s imagination will always drift to holding the other’s small hand every time he feels the presence of it near his. When it actually happens, it takes Jisung a few seconds before it dawns on him that Chenle’s pinky finger is curling around his. Funny how as simple as that is enough to take his breath and sanity away. He cannot even hear anything, not even his breathing or his heartbeat. All his focus is on the other’s fingers slowly tucking them one by one until his hand is covering Jisung’s.
Jisung is internally debating whether to pull his hands off of him. He decides that he should and starts pulling his hand but Chenle tightens his hold, intertwining it this time. Jisung hears the other smile and glances at Chenle.
“Looked like they’re molded for each other.” Chenle remarks, adoring their intertwined hands. It’s a cheesy ancient pick-up line but as the older turns to meet his eye with the sides crinkling from smiling so big, Jisung is fucking gone.
Avoiding the melting gaze of the older, Jisung admired their hands together and he couldn’t help but agree. Their hands perfectly fit each other - Chenle’s hands are small yet they fit the gap of his big ones right, like a puzzle piece. The entire species of butterflies in his stomach is fluttering throughout the movie with his hand in his, but his mind keeps reminding him to get the facts straight before diving in.
They finish the movie and let each other go before Sungchan notices and turns the light on. As usual, Jisung packs up his laptop, speaker, and charger to store them in his room before heading to the shared bathroom to brush his teeth. This is his way of giving the other two time to do their business in the bathroom before his turn.
Seeing his hand in the mirror as he brushes his teeth reminds him of how he felt when Chenle tucks them one by one. He can still feel the warmth of the older hands around his, and weird as it sounds, Jisung feels safe holding his hand. He shakes out the thought. Chenle still should have made everything clear before doing things that confuses the hell out of Jisung.
“I’m sorry.” Jisung almost chokes in shock hearing Chenle speaks.
“Yah! How long have you been standing there?”
“I’m actually waiting for you to finish but it bothers and worries me that you’re taking a long time. The door is ajar and you’re only brushing your teeth so I let myself in.” Chenle is about to speak again when Jisung raises a hand to stop him. The latter finishes brushing his teeth before facing Chenle.
“What were you going to say?” Jisung asks, leaning back on the sink.
“I’m sorry for acting on impulse. It’s just, movie nights are crazy, you know? You drive me crazy, Park Jisung.” Chenle confesses, frustration evident in his tone and the way he scratches his eyes. Yet his eyes… instead of the usual eye smile, Jisung sees the vulnerability of the older in it.
“Me?” He squeaks.
“Yes, you and your gummy smiles and the sound of your laugh are the most beautiful thing I have ever seen and heard. Ever since that first dinner I made you laugh, I promised myself that I’d do anything and everything just to see it and hear it one more time. Even if I make a fool out of myself. I didn’t know I just put myself in big trouble.” Chenle closes his eyes and breathes deeply before he opens them again, squarely looking back at him, and continues, “I am falling for you every time you laugh because of me. Sitting beside you isn’t helping. I don’t even know what we have been watching the past few nights because all I can think of is holding your hand.
I’d understand if you feel uncomfortable, and you are right to feel so. I will never do it again if you ask me to stop.”
It is the right thing to do, Jisung knows that. Jaemin is right, the movies and romance novels are right. Nothing good comes out of a summer romance. It’s a short-lived romance and Jisung and his attachment issue are not built for it. Also, what if Sungchan finds out or worse, his mom? They’d be disappointed for sure.
So telling Chenle to stop is the last thing Jisung does.
Jaemin saying When else can you have a summer romance, right? flashes before his eyes like a bulb light and now he finds himself smiling every night before he sleeps.
The constant discreet exchange of messages every night makes gambling his heart worth it. It has long been since someone makes him feel special and beautiful, makes him feel like he’s the only person in someone else’s world. Also, the stolen moments are like a drug - addicting and make you feel so high.
“Parted bangs look good on you,” Chenle whispers one time when he catches Jisung by the arm, stopping him before he walks out of the kitchen.
“Did you bring a jacket? I heard it’s going to rain.” Chenle’s message when Jisung leaves to go with his mom to grocery shopping.
“Hey, sleepyhead. I cooked breakfast so get up now. I want to see your smile before I leave for my shift.” A note from Chenle says slips under his bedroom door after the sender knocks on his door.
“You made my summer brighter than the sun.” A random message Jisung gets from Chenle during one of his shifts.
The afternoons when they have the whole house to themselves become their little escapade. They get to talk about life, and weird things and get to know more each other. While the movie nights that used to get Jisung nervous and awkward, makes him excited and looks forward to secretly holding Chenle’s hand. Sometimes, Jisung catches the older staring at him rather than watching the movie and whispering,
“You’re the most beautiful thing to watch.”
Jisung doesn’t know if Sungchan is just oblivious to the things happening around him or if he knows and just lets them be but eventually he gets tired of their movie marathon. He now prefers to retire to his room after dinner, saying he wants to rest. But Jisung can hear him talking on the phone for hours. He wonders if his cousin finds himself someone and his own summer romance.
Tonight, they choose to watch Warm Bodies. Chenle has his arms wrapped around Jisung, hugging him from the side, occasionally caressing his stomach. It’s a bit blurry how things escalate from them holding hands to hugging this quickly. Yes, the two get bolder every night and at the back of Jisung’s head, he knows this is going to bite him in the ass, but for now, Jisung is savoring the moment.
As they watch, Chenle’s phone keeps beeping and they both see that there are not one but a few incoming messages from one person. Jisung is familiar with the name of the sender as the man Sungchan mentioned over dinner earlier who has a crush on Chenle. It is one of the young chefs of the seafood restaurant. Jisung just watches Chenle opens the messages, not even hiding the screen from him, and puts his phone back on the table.
“Why won’t you answer it?” Jisung asks.
“Not worth my time.” He simply answers, beaming at him before tightening his arms around the younger, focusing back on the movie.
“Don’t you think Jeno’s good looking than me?” Jisung presses, acting like a jealous boyfriend. But no, he is not jealous. He just wants to see how Chenle reacts to that.
“So? Do you want me to date him?” He asks back, without even thinking. As if he’s not genuinely thinking about it as his eyes are still fixed on the movie.
“Would you?” He sees the look on Chenle’s face turn from serious to scrunching it. Then, in one swift move, Chenle kisses him on the cheeks and in shock, Jisung slaps his arm. “What the hell do you think you’re doing?”
Jisung is not truly mad but the action has taken him aback. Are they now in the kissing phase? Is summer romance this fast?
“Answering your question. You’ll probably be the last person I’d be dating so stop wondering.” Jisung scoffs.
That’s plain impossible. He accepts the fact that his relationship or whatever this is will stay as a summer romance and nothing more. Maybe accepting it as what it is at an early stage will protect Jisung from falling in love. He has his fair share of flings but this one is different. This scares him the most. Jisung is scared that once he lets himself enjoy and feel the moments more, it’ll be harder for him to move on.
Once Warm Bodies ends, Jisung puts away their used glasses and plates in the kitchen. He doesn’t bother to turn on the light as he’ll only leave the dishes on the sink. He knows Chenle is following him so it doesn’t surprise him when the older gently grabs his arm to turn him around. They usually do this after every movie marathon and steal quick hugs before going to their separate rooms. But Jisung feels something soft on his lips for a second.
That. Is. Jisung’s. First. Kiss.
Too stunned to speak and too shocked to move, Chenle lowers his arms, locking them behind his waist, closing the gap, and claiming his lips once again.
Suddenly, everything feels so right and wrong all at the same time. Jisung abruptly pulls back when Chenle starts nibbling his lower lip and runs to his room. Dropping to the floor when his knees give up on him after closing the door. His hands travel to his heart and his lips.
Is summer romance supposed to be serious like a real relationship? Jisung likes Chenle and at any other time, he can see himself falling in love with him but not this time. Not when they only have two weeks left.
So what does Jisung do? He’s back to square one. Jisung is making himself invisible again from his visitors and only comes out of his room when Chenle is not around. Even during dinners.
I’m sorry. I know I went overboard. I shouldn’t have kissed you like that. If ever you crossed paths with a guy like me, avoid him at all costs. You don’t deserve someone like me.
I miss you. You don’t have to hide in your room, it’s your house after all. You could choose not to talk to me, but please let me see you once more.
How Jisung is missing Chenle’s hands, his goofy smile, the warmth of his hug, and just his presence after only two weeks is beyond him. But after that kiss, he is afraid of what he’ll become after this ends. Thinking it only takes him two weeks to crave Chenle’s affection makes his heart hurt to imagine himself alone if he lets it be for another two weeks.
“Nothing’s going on between you and Chenle, right?” Mrs. Park questions his son.
Sungchan and Chenle are invited to a summer gathering at the restaurant they are interning. Jisung wishes a shovel will magically appear and dig a grave for him to hide. He can lie but his mom knows him too well, but he also cannot tell her the truth. Especially now that it seems to be over.
“Nothing,” Jisung answers nonchalantly, hoping not too casual, staring back at his mom’s prying eyes. She observes him before nodding.
“Ah, really? I mean, I don’t want to hear anything from anyone if… Anyways, it’s good then that there’s nothing. I trust you, Jisung.”
It is the slowest day of Jisung’s summer. With nowhere and nothing else to occupy his mind, He is stuck in his room, reminiscing a few days, missing Chenle even more. Not to mention, the thought of not seeing or hearing his voice around the house nor receiving any message from Chenle.
“Look at him. He’s just like any other boy out there. He might be enjoying his time with that Jeno. Fuck him. I’m done with him.”
His phone rings just as he throws it on the foot of his bed. He freezes when he realizes it’s the ringtone he sets up for Chenle. He clears his throat before answering the call with a business tone but all he can hear is the older testing the sound of the mic, saying mic test . They sound like they are having a karaoke party.
Then Chenle is singing. Jisung recognizes the song as Troye Sivan’s My Youth.
“Did you like it?” Chenle asks uneasily after he finishes singing. It seems that Chenle is walking away from the party as the background noise changes to the sound of the waves crashing to the shore.
“Yeah. You do have a good singing voice,” Jisung answers casually as if Chenle doesn’t bring the whole zoo in his stomach back to life with the lyrics of the song.
“It’s only a few days but I miss you, Jisungie.” The defeat can be evidently heard in the raspiness of his voice, making his heart sink.
“Chenle…” Let’s stop this before it’s too late for the both of us, is what Jisung wants to say but he cannot make himself say it.
“I’m never good with words but I want you to know that I genuinely like you, Park Jisung. I couldn’t be more grateful that I have met you.”
All hell breaks loose the day Chenle returns. Something comes up with Sungchan’s family and though it is nothing serious, he has to go back with Jisung’s mom. That leaves Jisung and Chenle alone with all the tension between them. Jisung is standing outside his room while Chenle is five steps away from him, no four steps, three... His breath hitches as he watches the older’s eyes fixed on his lips. He hasn’t noticed that he was biting his lower lip until the other tugged it out, officially rendering him dead as Chenle’s thumb glided over the bruised part of his lip.
“Chenle.” Jisung breathes.
Chenle gently pushes him onto the wall, soft lips crashing over the other. Jisung snakes his hand up his arms and to his hair, running his hands through his locks as he feels the older’s tongue tracing his lips, begging for an entrance to which he grants.
They stay like that for quite some time, devouring and tasting each other. Before they know it, it becomes a habit.
Every chance they get, they will make out like it is going to be their last. If Jisung thinks, the flutter in his stomach is a drug, then kissing Chenle is heroin. There is still that conscious thinking that he’ll regret this, but at some point, Jisung stops wondering about the future and starts living in the present.
“The omelet is going to burn.” He reminds Chenle in between their heated make-out, pushing him away. Chenle gives him a smooch and deepens it before Jisung groans, tapping his back.
“Will I ever get enough of you, Jisung?” Chenle grins like a maniac and finally leaves the younger on the kitchen’s countertop and walks back to the stove.
Chenle gets a morning shift now after their summer get-together and to steal more moments like this, Jisung wakes up at five in the morning. Watching Chenle’s bareback as his muscles contracts while flipping the omelet and then pacing back and forth the kitchen as he cooks spurs Jisung’s imagination. This is a free taste of what’s it like to live with Zhong Chenle. It’s absurd to think ahead like that, he is fully aware of it thank you very much. Yet he still does it.
Why?
Because he has never felt this happier.
“You sure like to think a lot.” Chenle parts his legs, urging him to wrap them around his waist as he inches closer. Chenle traps Jisung between his hands on the countertop. Chenle may not say it, but Jisung can see it in his eyes. He’s worried for him too. They are on numbered days until reality hits them and go their own ways.
Chenle,
My mom found out about us. I might be gone now when you read this letter. I’m sorry I didn’t even say goodbye to you properly. I’m happy I met you and even if this is short-lived, I’m still grateful to you for making me feel special.
The first few days back in the city are the hardest with how his mom looks at him disappointingly. Jisung cannot blame her, he even lied to her once. Though Jisung doesn’t get why his mom disapproves, he just lets her do her way because mothers know best as they always say. Jisung wonders if he just answered her mom honestly that day would it have changed anything?
“I’m not going to stop you if you certainly like that kid, Jisung. But you don’t even know him well and let you’re letting him do those things with you? Yes, he’s friends with Sungchan but you haven’t even seen your cousin since this vacation. I’m just looking out for you, son.”
He receives a call from Chenle on their first night apart. Jisung appreciates that Chenle still calls him, does a movie marathon with him, and talks more even when they’re apart. Is it because it is still summer that the other is exerting effort or is this proof that Chenle is serious and that they’ll remain this way even after summer?
In some kind of sick joke of fate, Jisung receives a call back from their province letting him know that he passed the interview at the local Special Education school and hopes he can start his internship by Monday. Mrs. Park just rolls his eyes when he informs her that he has to go back and lets him be.
Chenle just arrives at the Park’s Summer House when he hears a song playing from the supposed vacant room that is Jisung’s. As he steps closer, he clearly can hear now Troye Sivan singing My Youth. Thinking he is still imagining things, he braces himself for disappointment as he turns the know and pushes the door open.
Just like in the movies, Jisung watches as the door opens in slow motion, little by little presenting Chenle in flesh, standing by his door, jaw agape in shock. He smiles back and murmurs I’m back .
“Fuck, I miss you so much, Jisung.” Chenle tucks a hair behind Jisung’s ear, a Jisung habit that Chenle finds so adorable.
“I missed you too.” and Chenle is leaning down as Jisung shuts his eyes close, waiting for the familiar soft chappy lips of his lover.
Chenle kisses him with longing and pleasure that makes Jisung dizzy. The latter locks his hand behind Chenle’s neck and pulls him as he lays back on his bed, moaning when Chenle squeezes his thigh when he directs it around his waist. Shivers run along Jisung’s body as Chenle sucks on his tongue and smoothes his now exposed thigh when his jersey short hitched up. Seeking relief as he feels the heat pooling down in his abdomen, he unconsciously pushes Chenle closer with his legs. The sudden friction of their clothed erections elicits a grunt from the older. Pleased, Jisung rolls his hips up and watches the older’s face crease in pleasure.
“Jisung, no, stop. We can’t.” Chenle stills the younger’s hips and gives him a torn gaze.
“I don’t see why we can’t.” He cups the face of the man above, thumbs stroking his high cheekbone, “You’re my first kiss, might as well be my first.”
“Oh, fuck me.”
“No, do me, Chenle.”
Even though they spend a little less time now for their last week together, they make up for the time by waking up earlier together since they both have internships in the morning. Chenle prepares their breakfast as the make-out in the kitchen on the side, or a quickie if they have plenty of time. Funny how they have the same kink of having sex with the thought of getting caught by Sungchan, it makes them get off fast.
Then at night, they’ll be having dinner with Sungchan and converse and laugh like one of their legs isn’t tangled with the other underneath the dinner table.
“What’s this?” Chenle hands him a rectangular box wrapped with a white silk ribbon.
“Open it.” The older chuckles as Jisung glares at him, thinking he’s going to prank him again. The suspicion turns into curiosity when Jisung sees the content of the box: a handkerchief, a small perfume bottle, and a polaroid picture of Chenle. He can smell a mix of his musky perfume and Chenle’s perfume from the box. He jumps a little feeling a cold thing touch his wrist. It’s a pearl bracelet. The older claims that when Jisung was away, he contracts the restaurant’s supplier to give him some pearls if he comes across clams.
“I would have dived and gotten them myself, but I’m not sure if it’s allowed. I just use my money instead.” Jisung giggles and sniffs. He knows what is going on and he’s sad that he didn’t even think about preparing a parting gift for Chenle.
“You’re enough for a gift, Park Jisung.” Chenle console him when he said as such, “Everything about us… is a gift I would forever treasure.”
Jisung wants to say and hear that they’ll see each other again or carry on with what they have. He isn’t a believer in long-distance relationships nor in summer romance, and yet he finds himself in one. He believes that as long as it is going to be with Chenle, it will be fine.
But he never says it nor he hears Chenle say it.