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Ryan was devastated. His now-only-love was going to die, and he sacrificed himself for nothing more than staying in the back of the ship; alive. Billie looked at him, sadly. His face always made people feel sad, but this time it was making it in a different way. She tried to take the step to talk to him, but couldn’t. She didn’t know what to say in that kind situation. Well, at least they’ve got the eels… Or maybe not.
Ryan continued looking from the window with his sad face. He knew the ship wouldn't be stuck together, but he felt like it could if he didnt stop looking at it. And then, there was Charles; doing the exact same thing, but without the sad face. He wasn’t smiling or something, but neither unhappy of being apart from Elena.
The sad men looked at him. “8 years, huh?” Charles felt excited for that, but tried not to be noticed about it. He didn’t want to show his happiness in front of Ryan knowing the way that this situation was affecting him.
“Billie” Ryan moved away from him. Maybe that was what he needed; a distraction. Trying to solve the problem of the missile could be his perfect distraction. Both moved to the engineers zone to recap what they’ve got in the back of the ship.
Meanwhile, Ryan got a call from Elena. “Perfect, I've made the perfect send-off for nothing. Can anything else go wrong?” he complained, sarcastically.
“Ryan? What's going on?” Elena asked. “Elena… I'm sorry. I-” Ryan was trying his best to think of a way to tell her why he is the worst person on that part of the ship, but his words couldn't get out. “What happened?” He sigh. “One of us is going to die today, Elena. I was trying to sacrifice my life, but I think I did it worse, and now… Maybe this side is not the one that is going to hit the missile. I'm so sorry, Elena” “Ryan…” She sounded like she was crying, but none of them wanted to talk about that. “It's okay… Things are done. I'm happy knowing at least your intention was saving me” Ryan couldn't continue hearing Elena crying “No, no. No, Elena. I-I promise I'll find a solution. I'm with Billie… Spike… Just, be patient, please” “Ryan… I love you. And, take care of Charles too, he also needs you” “Charles?” The call was cut off at that moment. “What?” said Charles. Ryan spun around and looked at him.
“What are you doing here?” Asked Ryan. “What do you mean? I wanted to talk to you. That's why I'm here” Ryan didn't make any sound. “Was it Elena you were talking to?” He nodded. “I see” Both in silence, Charles thought that he would say something. Anything, certainly. But nothing came out of his mouth. Just silence between them.
On the other hand, Billie was starting to get tired of his behavior. It was neither the time nor the place “C’mon Ryan. Talk to him already or not. I don’t care, but finish as soon as possible; I need your help here”. “Y-yeah. I’m sorry, Billie. It'll be just a sec” He took Charles’ hand, and left the room with him.
That hand made Charles feel like home. Like a comfortable and soft bed on a tired night. But he also felt his face a little bit hot and red.
Ryan led him to his room. It wasn't the best idea to talk with him there, alone, but things were a little difficult outside, and they needed an empty and close place so they could talk.
He released his hand just when they got to the door. “I… I'm sorry for that. I didn't expect you to come and… Well, we both love Elena. I guess it'll be difficult for you too. I'm sorry. The thing is-” “I know. The missile… I-I know all”. “Oh, okay” answeredRyan.
Suddenly, Chales took Ryan’s both hands. He thought that it would be easier to say what he wanted to say that way, but he was getting more and more nervous about it. Ryan looked at him with a non-understand face. “What are you doing?” Charles sigh. “Just let me say what I wanted to say. It's about Elena, anyway, so I think it's a great moment to tell you that… That I… I don't like Elena” Ryan looked confused, but also a little bit happy too “So that means he doesn't wanna marry us, right?” he thought “So, just Elena and I… That's good news then! You can tell Elena so she forgets about marrying the three of us. Thanks, Charles” Both of his hands were touching each other; Charles looked a little sad, so Ryan didn't want to risk getting his hands apart from him.
“It's everything okay?” “No” answered Charles. “The thing is… The thing that i wanted to tell you is that i'm in love with you Ryan” He was bewildered “Wait, you don't love Elena, but you do love me? That doesn't make sense! I thought you were catching feelings again” Charles tried his best to explain what he thought happened “That's what I thought too, but Elena and I… Our love expired so long ago and then you showed up, and I felt happy again. Like when I met her, You know? But it was just you. It was always you” Ryan released his hands, confused about the recent news.
“I'm sorry Ryan. I know you only love Elena but, maybe, with this situation, you can feel something about me with time. That is why I’m telling you this. I know: such an egoist desire. But it's the only thing I can think about every time I see you. I can't help imagining the day when you feel a small part of what I feel for you”
Ryan felt notably bad for him. Maybe he was being too rude all this time, and didn't think about his feelings. It's not fair to feel bad just ‘cause he doesn't feel the same, but it wasn't just that; he ignored that. He knew from the beginning what his feelings were and, even so, he didn't do anything. No even putting limits on him, or making it clear that he would not reciprocate those feelings. Maybe it was all because he didn't feel like that at all.
Or maybe he did feel a little bit like that about him.
“Charles… I should help handle this shit we’re going through right now. We can talk about this later” He seemed to agree, so Ryan walked to the door and waited until he was outside to say “If we survive”.