Chapter Text
Dread makes his every breath stutter. Fatigue, bone-deep and heavy, crushes him into the futon. His green eyes lack luster, staring at the ceiling like twin pools of the Abyss. All strength has left him, all will, all courage, all hope. Gone.
Heizou should have never taken life for granted. He’ll never last the winter.
Now he regrets not savouring every breath taken without a stuffy nose and every second without a headache. If he inhales too hard, he’s thrown into a coughing fit. If he tries to lift a finger, it falls back on the bed with a dull thud. Each time he pulls out a tissue, he fears it’s the last in the box.
He’s going to die. He knows it. He’s going to wither and die without having the chance to say goodbye to—
A knock on his front door startles him enough to make him gasp, which sends him into another round of coughs.
“Heizou?” A familiar voice calls through the door.
Kazuha? Heizou wants to jump up and rush to the door so badly, but he’s rooted in place. He wants to answer verbally, but his voice fails him.
He hears the faint click of a key turning in a lock and hope swells in his chest. He’d forgotten about Kazuha’s spare key to his apartment. Salvation is finally, finally within reach.
The bedroom door creaks open and Kazuha steps inside. Either Heizou’s hallucinating, or there’s a halo of light around him when their eyes meet. He’s suddenly very aware of how terrible he must look.
His room is a mess, his blanket is a mess, he himself is a mess. Man alive, what a handful.
“Kazuha,” Heizou breaks the silence first, trying and failing to sit up. “I didn’t think…”
“That I’d be here so soon?” Kazuha guesses correctly. “I’m actually a day late. My apologies.”
“You’re— what?” A newfound burst of energy allows Heizou to support himself on his elbows. He sighs. “I got the days mixed up, I didn’t even notice. Must’ve forgotten how to count.” He manages a quiet laugh before he coughs again.
Kazuha darts forward to kneel at Heizou’s side, hands outstretched. “Are you alright? How long have you been sick for?”
Heizou lets Kazuha gently push him back down without protest. “Since yesterday,” he rasps, squeezing his eyes shut. “Of course I go into the office when there’s a bug going around. I bet it was Uesugi that got me sick…”
“Are you cold?” Kazuha’s soft tone prompts him to open his eyes. When he sees Heizou’s confusion, he gestures to the blanket. “It’s only covering half of you, and you’re sick.”
As if just now realizing it, Heizou shivers and hugs himself. “Yeah.”
Kazuha pulls the blanket up to his chin. “Better?”
“Better.” Heizou sniffles. “You shouldn’t stay too long. I’ll give you this nasty cold.”
“It would take a lot to get me truly sick.” Kazuha makes himself comfortable on the floor to assert his refusal. “I’m staying until you’re healthy enough to take care of yourself.”
“I can do that just fine.”
He doesn’t like the dubious look on Kazuha’s face. “When was the last time you ate?”
Heizou peers out of the window. The clear blue of the cloudless sky tells him that it’s around midday. When did he wake up, again? He squints at the sky, trying to recall.
He’s been in and out of consciousness since… he has no idea. When he ate that single apple, was it today or yesterday?
“I had something recently,” Heizou says. Technically not a lie.
“How recently?”
“Sometime in the last twenty four hours.”
“Heizou,” Kazuha warns.
“I’m not hungry, I swear—” Heizou’s interrupted by his own traitorous stomach grumbling. “Ignore that.”
“I’m afraid I can’t.” Kazuha stands. “I’ll make you something light. Wait here, please.”
Heizou shakes his head. “You can’t.”
“If you don’t eat something, you won’t have the strength to recover.”
“That’s not what I mean.” Heizou clears his throat. “I haven’t gone shopping yet.”
“Then I’ll do your shopping for you first,” Kazuha says without missing a beat. “What do you need?”
“Kazuha, don’t.” Heizou sighs long and loud, feeling more helpless than ever. Kazuha is too kind for his own good. He knows that they were supposed to spend the next few days together anyway, but this is just too much. “I’ll take care of it later. Seriously, you should save yourself. I don’t want to end up taking you down with me.” He offers his best, albeit weak, smile.
“I’m not leaving you like this. I refuse to.” Kazuha frowns. “Why won’t you let me help you?”
“I just…” Heizou avoids his eyes before rolling onto his side, facing away from Kazuha. “I feel bad for bothering you,” he mumbles.
He hears quiet shuffling behind him, then fingers are stroking through his hair. “What makes you think you’re bothering me?” Kazuha asks patiently, though Heizou hears the slightest bit of hurt in his voice. It only makes him feel worse.
Heizou reaches for the tissue box beside his pillow and blows his nose. “You came here to visit a friend and have a good time, but now I’m sick and miserable. That’s no fun, is it?” He flings the tissue at the bin against the wall and misses, like most of the failed attempts laying around it. “I’m happy to see you. Really. I’d just feel terrible if you came all this way and ended up being my errand boy while you’re here.”
Kazuha hums, absently twirling Heizou’s hair around his fingers. “You’d do the same for me if I was sick, wouldn’t you?”
“Of course I would.” As the words leave his mouth, he realizes how silly he sounds. His brain is all muddled so he can’t think straight. Heizou’s cheeks burn and he tries to hide his embarrassment under the blanket, but Kazuha won’t let him.
His friend tugs the blanket away from his face and hovers over him. “How about this: I will stay with you until you’re well. Afterwards, you can treat me to whatever you like. Is that alright with you?”
Heizou stares up at him, lips parted. If it were any other day, he’d tease Kazuha, saying that sounds like a date. It’s on the tip of his tongue. Instead, he swallows the words and smushes his cheek into the pillow. “I can live with that.”
“Thank you.” Kazuha removes his fingers the moment Heizou starts to relax. “I look forward to it. Now, what do you need me to buy?”
“Eggs.” Heizou rolls onto his back. “And… I can’t remember.”
“If you can stand, you can come with me to the kitchen and check,” Kazuha says. “Need a hand getting up?”
“I might need several.” Heizou chuckles, taking both of Kazuha’s offered hands and standing up with him.
Their venture in the kitchen ends with a decently long shopping list and Heizou trying to shove a small bag of Mora into Kazuha’s hand.
“I have my own Mora.” Kazuha pushes the bag towards Heizou, who only pushes back.
“Just take it,” Heizou insists. “The food is for me and I’d spend the money myself if I wasn’t so—” he quickly turns away to sneeze into his elbow.
“I don’t mind, I should have enough to cover this.”
“No, that’s your wandering money. For…” Heizou squints. Kazuha travels light, doesn’t he? “Uh. Inn rooms and food. Those expenses add up.”
“This is food, isn’t it?” Kazuha closes Heizou’s fingers around the pouch and gives him a reassuring smile. “Keep it. I’m cooking for myself too, you know. It’s no trouble.”
Heizou pouts but ultimately relents. He can feel his remaining energy dwindle to a mere speck and all he wants to do is lay down. “Fine, fine.” His eyelids droop and he fights to keep them open.
“You should go wait in bed.” Kazuha places a hand on his shoulder and guides him back to his room. “I won’t be long.”
“I promise I’ll make it up to you,” Heizou calls as he climbs under the covers and Kazuha shuts the door.
Archons, how is he supposed to give him something equal to this? Kazuha has no idea how big of a help this is to him. Heizou hadn’t given much thought to his next meal before Kazuha showed up. It wouldn’t be an exaggeration to say he saved his life.
I can’t join him when he wanders, Heizou muses. I’m already off work because I’m sick. I bet the cases are piling up on my desk as we speak… but I’ll still have time for him.
Question is: what do they do?
The easiest answer would be to take him to Ryouko in Ritou for his favourite food. Both of their favourite foods, really. It’s their go-to spot whenever Kazuha returns to Inazuma.
But Kazuha would expect something like that. Or worse, he would expect something different, something more, and be disappointed by the usual. This is supposed to be special. It must be.
It’s what Kazuha deserves.
Now, what does that revelation leave him with?
As much as Kazuha treasures experiences and quality time, it may be nice to get him a gift. A small one he can carry with him all over Teyvat. He is more humble than most in terms of personal possessions, but there must be something he’d want or like to use.
Heizou dives deep into the pool of his thoughts, searching his memories. If Kazuha has mentioned wanting, needing or liking anything, he has to remember what it was and know where to get it. The gears in his head turn as he searches and searches.
He ruminates for so long that he doesn’t notice the door opening or Kazuha announcing that he’s back.
“Are you awake?” Kazuha pops his head through his bedroom doorway and scares Heizou half to death. Archons, his senses must be dulled by sickness.
“Oh, it’s you.” Heizou clears his throat, pretending it’s only to get rid of the phlegm and not to compose himself. “I’m very awake.”
“I wanted to let you know I bought everything on the list.” Kazuha opens the door wider, stepping inside. Heizou spots a dark brown bottle in his hand. “Plus some medicine for you.”
“Medicine?” Heizou yanks the covers over his head. “Man alive, don’t do this to me, Kazuha. I’m begging you.”
Kazuha sighs, rolling his eyes and sitting at Heizou’s side. “Sit up, please. You need to recover.”
“No,” Heizou whines, dragging out the word. “It tastes worse than Tenryou Commission dinners. I know that brand anywhere.”
“It’s the most effective thing I could find,” Kazuha argues. “It’ll be good for you, even if the taste is… subpar.”
“Can’t I just eat your delicious cooking and get better that way?”
“Flattery won’t get you anywhere this time.”
“Please?”
“No.”
Heizou peeks out from under the blanket and glares at the bottle, then up at Kazuha. It’s impossible for him to be angry at his friend, so the tension in the air swiftly disappears as his face softens. “Fine.” He groans and sits up. “Let’s get this over with.”
The smile Kazuha gives him is almost worth the disgusting, face-scrunching taste. After downing the appropriate dosage, he wheezes and sticks his tongue out. Revulsion doesn’t even begin to describe this new, all-consuming emotion he’s unlocked.
“Oh Archons, Kazuha,” Heizou rasps, on the verge of clasping his hands in prayer for mercy. “They shouldn’t sell that stuff. It’s poison.”
Kazuha only chuckles, patting his hand sympathetically. “I’ll make you tea to wash it down, then I’ll start the food. Thank you for taking it.”
The rancid taste in his mouth becomes more palatable once he hears those words. Heizou blinks at him. He must be imagining that tender look in those red eyes. “I… no problem.”
With that, Kazuha leaves the room and Heizou stares after him. The perfect gift springs to mind.
Yes, that’s it! If he had the strength, he’d snap his fingers with glee. I know just what to get him.
~
“It’s ready.” Kazuha nudges the door open wider with his foot. He’s carrying two hot bowls of miso soup on a long tray.
Heizou looks up from his half-finished tea. Though his nose is stuffy, the soup’s aroma is strong enough to intoxicate him. “Already? You work fast.”
“It wasn’t any faster than usual.” Kazuha settles right next to him and balances the tray across their thighs. It’s not long enough to comfortably fit both of their laps, but it’ll do. “How’s your throat?”
“The tea’s helping a lot.” Heizou sets his teacup on the corner of the tray and slides the bowl closer to himself. “It’s not so scratchy anymore.”
“I’m glad.” Kazuha picks up his spoon and starts eating. Heizou mirrors the action. “You should try saving your voice, though.”
“Tired of hearing me talk so soon?” Heizou nudges his arm.
“No, no. I’m afraid of your throat getting worse if you talk too much.” Kazuha taps his spoon against the rim of his bowl. “I could tell you about my recent trip to Mondstadt, if you wish.”
“The land of the Anemo Archon?”
“The very same.”
While they eat, Kazuha tells him all about it: the big windmills, the lush green grass, the unique flowers, the wine and song. The wind is gentler there than the storms and sometimes electrified air in Inazuma.
He recounts his visit to Stormterror’s Lair and mentions the heavy air of melancholy that pressed down on him the entire time, though he can’t say why. The spinning red flowers are called Windwheel Asters and he wishes he could bring one back to show Heizou. There are other flowers he’s sure Heizou would have liked, like the Cecilias, the Calla Lilies, and even the Small Lamp Grass that glows in the dark. He worried so much about the flowers potentially getting crushed that he decided against picking and buying any.
There is an enormous tree at Windrise, which is home to bright blue crystalflies. Interestingly, he met a bard at a tavern called Angel’s Share who he’d say resembles the Statue of the Seven by that tree.
“He said his name was Venti,” Kazuha says, scooping up the last piece of tofu. “Most of the resemblance was in the hairstyle and youthful face. Not a lot to go off of, to be honest.”
“You’ve got a sharp eye,” Heizou argues. “You don’t say that someone looks like an Archon in passing.”
“I know, but I’d be a little concerned if that man was my Archon.” Kazuha looks to the left, the right, then back at Heizou. “Not to be blasphemous,” he whispers, “but he has a long-running tab at that tavern. From the look on the bartender’s face, that tab seems extensive.”
The laugh Heizou lets out is so loud and sudden, he coughs a few times. “Archons don’t have money?”
“Shh.” Kazuha places a finger against Heizou’s lips. What if their Archon catches wind of them talking about her fellow god like this? “Even if Venti is the Archon, he’s also a bard. Bards aren’t rich people. He doesn’t rule Mondstadt like a certain someone does.”
“He definitely sounds like a free spirit, Archon or not.” Heizou snickers. “A god with a tab… oh, that’ll keep me going for days.”
Kazuha smiles, unable to stop himself from chuckling either. His eyes dart to Heizou’s empty bowl. “I’m surprised you ate it all. I thought you said you weren’t hungry,” he teases.
“Of course I ate it all, you’re an amazing cook.” Heizou covers his mouth to yawn. “I feel like I might fall asleep right here, though,” he mumbles, eyelids drooping.
“Then sleep.” Kazuha takes the tray. “Don’t worry about the dishes, I’ll handle them.”
Leaving no room for argument, he steps out of the room and begins as soon as he reaches the kitchen sink. It takes no time for his mind to wander.
Part of him regrets arriving late. If Heizou’s been sick since yesterday, was he doing worse than he is now? Being sick all alone is far from ideal. Thank goodness he’s here to help him now.
While they ate earlier, Kazuha didn’t miss how lively Heizou looked when he described Mondstadt. His green eyes shone, he smiled, asked a few questions, and the fatigue faded from his face for a good while. Kazuha’s sure it’s the food that temporarily brought a fraction of his boundless energy back, though he can’t help but wonder…
“I’m happy to see you. Really.”
The words echo in his mind and bring a soft, fond smile to his face. It was difficult to miss the way Heizou looked at him when he first walked in, so relieved and cheerful. If only he could bottle that gaze and tuck it close to his heart where it’s safest. He’d protect it with his life.
If his presence brought so much light to Heizou’s day, did that mean he felt the same?
Not necessarily, Kazuha is quick to backtrack. Denial doesn’t stop his face from heating up. Maybe there’s a sliver of hope?
Maybe. It’s hardly the right time to ask Heizou himself.
Kazuha stares into space, his brain on autopilot and not registering his empty hands or finished task. When would be the right time? Not while he’s sick, of course, but after that?
Shaking his head, he mentally brings himself back to Teyvat and returns to Heizou’s room. He can ponder it later.
The sight that greets him stirs his heart. Heizou’s fast asleep and snug under the covers. Sure, they’ve had sleepovers before, but Heizou’s been so drained today that Kazuha’s more than glad to see him this peaceful.
It’s still too early for Kazuha to go to bed himself, so he sits next to Heizou, content to watch over him while he naps. Occasionally he shifts in his sleep and his hair falls over his eyes. Each time, Kazuha brushes it back, gentle as a feather. When the sun begins to set and casts its light over Heizou’s body, Kazuha is swift to draw the curtains and light a lantern. He even checks the tissue box and hunts for a new one after deeming it too light. A second box wouldn’t hurt.
He’s in the middle of penning a new journal entry when he notices a sharp change in Heizou’s breathing. Kazuha hardly has the time to put his pencil down before Heizou bolts upright, his coughing fits returning with a vengeance.
“Heizou?” Kazuha rests a hand on his back, unsure of what else to do. He wishes he could take his pain away. All he can do is slowly rub Heizou’s back until he calms down.
“Ugh, man alive,” Heizou barely manages after several moments. Tears stream down his face and cover his cheeks in a glistening sheen.
“Do you need water?” Kazuha asks, getting a nod in response. He quickly leaves and returns with a full glass, then hands it to Heizou, who takes greedy gulps and drains it in seconds.
“Thanks.” Heizou clears his throat. “That was awful.”
“Are you alright?” With a slight tremble in his hand, Kazuha reaches out and brushes the tears off Heizou’s cheek with his thumb.
Heizou sighs, shutting his eyes and leaning into the touch. “Yeah, sorry. I probably scared you a bit. I know I scared myself.” He chuckles, though there’s no merriment in it.
“I’m more worried about you than myself,” Kazuha says, dabbing his other cheek with a tissue. “Please, you should lay back down and rest. I’ll be right here.”
Finally seeing the lantern and how dark the room is without it, he shakes his head. “It’s late. You should sleep too.”
“In the guest room?” Kazuha frowns. “I’m reluctant to leave you alone like this.”
“I’ll be fine,” Heizou assures, “that was just a little mishap.”
“I believe our definitions of ‘little’ are different.”
“Come on, Kazuha, don’t make me keep you from sleeping. I’d feel guilty for a week. Isn’t it your favourite thing to do?”
“I’d forgo it if it means you get a good night’s rest.”
Heizou’s mouth opens, but no words form. He averts his eyes and lifts the blanket instead. “Climb in.”
Kazuha looks between Heizou and the blatant invitation into his bed. “You don’t mind sharing?” He asks tentatively, thinking it too good to be true.
“Just— don’t steal the covers.” The embarrassment in Heizou’s voice is palpable.
Kazuha laughs softly, crawling into the futon. He’s thankful he had the mind to change out of his traveling outfit and into more comfortable clothes before cooking. “I’m not a blanket thief, don’t worry.”
“Well, good.” Heizou lays on his side, facing away from him. “Sweet dreams.”
“Sweet dreams.”
And so they lay there, pretending to be asleep while their thoughts run faster than light. At least that’s what Kazuha assumes. He knows he’s a bit flustered, himself.
He sneaks a glance to his right and sees Heizou in the same position as before. His breathing is as smooth as it can be in his situation. No reason to be concerned, but Kazuha can still tell he’s awake for longer than he’d expect a sick person to be. He wonders what he’s thinking about. If it’s keeping him up, he should talk about it.
“Heizou?” He whispers.
“Hm?”
“Is something on your mind?”
“No, I just… thought there was a tickle in my throat.” Heizou sniffles. “I’m fine. Goodnight.”
Kazuha almost wants to push further, but Heizou’s breathing evens out in record time. No need to interfere after all.
He decides to follow Heizou’s lead and relax. Soon, his eyelids droop and he falls into deep slumber.
~
Heizou stands outside the door of his own apartment, shaky hands tightly gripping a small box. Not shaky because he’s weak and sick— no, he recovered just yesterday, thanks to Kazuha.
He can’t remember the last time he was so nervous.
It’s a miracle he managed to wake up before Kazuha, who’s been keen on giving him breakfast in bed lately. He used this luck to run straight to the markets and hunt for a suitable gift. Now that he’s back, he can’t help but second-guess himself.
What if Kazuha doesn’t like it? What if he’d rather get something else, or maybe he just humoured Heizou and didn’t actually want anything at all. What if he only accepts a simple “thank you” and nothing more? Kazuha’s far too kind to turn down a gift, but what if he discards it when Heizou isn’t looking?
No, he’d never do that. He’s not that kind of person, Heizou reasons. He takes a deep breath and grabs the door handle. Now or never.
When he steps inside, the apartment is the same as it was when he left. No breakfast smells, no Kazuha shuffling around the kitchen, no greeting once the door opened. Kazuha must still be asleep.
And sure enough, when he opens his bedroom door, he finds Kazuha on his own side of the futon they’ve been sharing for the past couple days. Interestingly, he seems to be reaching for something that isn’t there while he mumbles incoherent words.
Cute, Heizou thinks before shaking himself back to the present. He doesn’t have time to fawn over his best friend, he has a gift to give.
“Hey, Kazuha.” Heizou sits on the futon and shakes Kazuha’s shoulder.
“Mmm…” Kazuha’s hand comes to rest on his thigh and the smallest satisfied smile graces his lips.
Heizou’s heart leaps into his throat. Focus, he needs to focus. “I— Kazuha, wake up, come on.”
“What is it?” Kazuha drawls, his eyes slowly blinking open. Once he sees Heizou, he instantly becomes alert. “You’re up already?”
“Yep.”
Kazuha sits up, a blush on his cheeks as he removes his hand from Heizou’s thigh with a soft apology. “Why didn’t you wake me up sooner? I would have cooked for you.”
“Two reasons: one, I wanted you to sleep in. As for number two…” Heizou presents the box with a timid smile. “I went out to buy you this.”
“For me?” Kazuha takes the plain dark green box. “This isn’t for taking care of you these past few days, is it? Really, you shouldn’t have. I said it’s no trouble.”
“I know, I know, but I said I would pay you back. I promise it’s small.” Heizou gestures to the gift. “Will you open it? I think you’ll like it.”
Kazuha’s lips part, but he stops. Instead, he nods and lifts the lid. “Oh, it is small.”
He pulls out a light brown hair tie. Upon closer inspection, the three little attachments lining the band are hand-drawn smiling deer faces.
Heizou watches with the utmost seriousness as Kazuha marvels at it. “Well? What do you think?” He plasters a smile on his face when Kazuha turns his awestruck gaze on him.
“Is this custom-made?” Kazuha asks.
“I don’t know, maybe. I didn’t commission it, if that’s what you’re asking. I just saw it at an accessory shop.” Heizou plays with the hem of his shorts. “Do you… like it?”
“Yes.” Kazuha fondly traces one of the deer faces with a fingertip. “I love it. Thank you very much, Heizou.” He pulls out his current hair tie and leaves it on his wrist. “Will you do the honours?”
“Huh? Me?”
Kazuha nods.
“Oh, sure,” Heizou stammers. He takes the offered tie and moves behind Kazuha.
He mentally runs through every hairstyle he knows. Kazuha’s usual ponytail would be too easy, too expected. In Heizou’s heart, this is a special occasion. Therefore, he needs to try something new. Thankfully he has taste. He would never let Kazuha walk around with a crazy hairstyle.
It’s long enough for a half ponytail, isn’t it?
Heizou slips his fingers into Kazuha’s hair, gently combing through and undoing a couple of knots before tying it. Without thinking, he continues stroking the part of Kazuha’s hair left out of the ponytail, his heartbeat quickening.
He’s broken out of his daze by Kazuha’s laughter. “It seems you’re enjoying the gift too.”
Frozen in place, Heizou makes a lightning-fast excuse. “Just checking for knots. And who says I can’t admire my handiwork?”
“I certainly won’t stop you.” Kazuha looks at him over his shoulder.
Something about the glint in his eyes makes Heizou gulp. Or is it the way the sunlight shines through the window and sets a particular glow about him? The way his hair frames his radiantly smiling face?
Archons, if Heizou didn’t just recover from a cold, he’d believe he’s running a terrible fever. There’s no other reason for how hot and suffocated he feels. No other explanation for the most beautiful dream right in front of him.
“You look nice,” Heizou blurts. “I mean— the hair tie looks good on you.”
The smile he receives loses its teasing edge, melting into something softer. “Thank you. I’ll cherish it always.”
His heart skips a beat. “Always?”
“For the rest of my life.”
All at once, three words dance on his tongue and nearly leap out. Heizou flattens them to the roof of his mouth. Does he see those same words in Kazuha’s eyes, or is he being thrown off by sentiment again? Their faces are so close, he fears he may be seeing things.
“Heizou?” Kazuha whispers.
“Yes?” His reply is just as quiet.
Kazuha’s lips part and Heizou wants to capture them with his own. “About breakfast… shall we cook together?”
A grin nearly splits Heizou’s face in two. “I’d love to cook with you.”
After all, sick or healthy, the time they spend together is priceless.