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A poke to the side of your head has you seething. It's been an hour that you've tried to ignore his parasitic presence, to no avail.
You're at your wits end.
Another poke to the side of your head. You're practically foaming at the mouth, wanting nothing more than to turn around and rip out the throat of the nuisance seated beside you. One moment, you were in the zone; studying and moving through your homework with commendable speed, the next? Alastor appeared beside you, staring with that stupid ass grin. How the hell were you supposed to concentrate when he just sat there and stared at you?
"Don't you have something better to do?" You grit, exerting extreme care to keep your voice level.
Another poke.
"Well, I have more important things to do, but this is much more fun, isn't it?" Alastor attempts to tap your nose, at which you snap at his finger. He reels back, but his grin never falters, only letting out a chuckle at your frustration.
Why the hell did you get stuck with this asshole? Couldn't you have summoned a more agreeable demon? One that doesn't find enjoyment in annoying the absolute hell out of you?
"You know something that'd be more fun? If you took that toothbrush you never use and shove it up your-"
"Ooh, I know what we can do!" Your laptop is snatched from your lap and set on the counter. "Why don't we get you outside, hm? I'm sure some time outside your enclosure will do wonders for your absolutely charming personality."
"I can't just stop what I'm doing on a whim, especially yours. You don't pay rent here, dickhead, I have work to do." You huff, heaving yourself from the couch to retrieve your laptop. Pompous prick, thinking he can tell you what to do and when like an obedient... Thing. You've never listened to a man, and you're sure as hell not gonna listen to a demon. They're practically the same thing, Alastor just looks the part now. With a grunt, you bump into a firm surface.
"Oh, is that a victory I smell? How jake! I didn't know it'd take something as simple as going outside." You look up from the demon's chest at his cocky grin, suppressing the growing urge to clock him right in the face. If you didn't have so much pride, you'd have burnt that contract and all ties with the demon. But demon deals aren't that simple, unfortunately.
"Fuck you." Turning on your heel, you grab your bag and tread outside.
"I'd rather not." Alastor hums, following and closing the door behind him.
After a few minutes of walking, and likely a result of his stupid need to be ahead of you in every regard, Alastor walks a few feet in front of you, humming a tune with his annoyingly on-tune voice.
You walk through your apartment complex without a proper destination in mind. What is his plan? Bring you outside so he can humiliate you publicly, leaving you helpless to defend yourself? You burn holes into his human disguise. He walks with that same pompous gait as his demonic form, hands behind his straightened back. Stupid, broad shoulders on full display. Gold eyes flitting back to you, with a stupid wink that makes your heart flip and burn with contempt.
You hate him so much.
The sidewalk is shaded, thanks to the large oak trees scattered throughout the complex. If not for the pain in your ass a few feet in front of you, you might have found this walk pleasant. Inhaling through your nose, you take in the scent of damp grass and wet sidewalk, courtesy of the sprinklers.
The sprinklers.
A grin spreads across your face, hastening your steps to catch up to the tall demon.
"Is everything on fire in Hell, like it is in the stories?" You ask in a deadpan tone, feigning your usual disdain and disinterest in the demon's affair.
"Coming around, hm? I knew a walk outside your little dog house would do you some good. No, everything is not on fire unless there's a turf war, quite entertaining spectacles, I must say!" He continues on a tirade, just according to plan.
"Does it get hot at all?" You inquire.
"Just where are these questions coming from? I suppose it can, but-"
"Then here's a way to cool off!" You shove him into the path of the sprinklers, laughing at his wide eyes and shocked, open grin. His suit is darkened by the water and he looks at you with a glower you've seen before. A glower that means it's time to run.
You break camp and sprint down the sidewalk, laughing at the ridiculous face of your demonic nuisance. Only you bump into a firm surface that you're glued to, thanks to a force on your back pressing you into the surface. You grunt and push back against what you already know is Alastor's chest, a few laughs escaping you at the dampness of his suit.
Without a word, Alastor walks back into the path of the sprinklers and holds you out in front of one, you squirming and protesting the whole way, only to be blasted with water.
He drops you onto the wet grass and laughs when you try to get up, but slip on your back again.
You grab his ankle and yank with all your might, causing him to topple into the wet grass.
"Now you look just like what you are, a wet blanket." Alastor jests, rising and dusting off pieces of grass from his suit.
"And you look like a- oh, fuck you." You flick water up onto his face with a grin.
He can be fun at times, maybe he's a decent person beneath all that… dressage. You have fun with him sometimes.
Sometimes.
He flicks the back of your head, at which you turn around and smack his hand.
Nevermind, fuck this guy.