Chapter Text
Days in high school weren’t any easier to get through for Clyde, elementary school might have been easier by a long shot, school was still school. Staring at the empty whiteboard- or the crammed white board, made him sleepy. Well, it was stereotypical for someone like him, he guessed. The teachers seemed to like bringing it up that it was because he was a dumb jock (they never said it outright but they definitely hinted towards it being the reason). The brunette glanced at his desk, tapping on it in a nonsensical rhythm before returning his attention to the teacher once she cleared her throat at him.
“Have better things to do, Mr. Donovan?”
Clyde looked at her, clenching his jaw and shook his head at her. Why did teachers go out of their way to embarrass their students? She continued on what she was teaching, or more like talking about. It made Clyde regret this independent studies class he chose to take. At first, he assumed it would have been easier because it was what you wanted to do. Unfortunately, it meant a lot more projects that were one of the couple assignments you got. Due to this, everything he did was important and there was no room to ignore assignments he just didn’t want to do. It was shit.
“This project is best to be done with a partner- you can do this by yourself, but it could be overwhelming. Class time will be given to complete this assignment, but it would be good to also do other portions outside of the classroom. Once completed, this will be presented to everyone.” Clyde listened to the teacher, paying attention to the last bit of whatever she said. This project made a pit in his gut, there was no way he could possibly do this by himself and continue playing football the way he was. The teacher continued, clasping her hands together, “That’s all I have to say about the project, rubric is where it normally is and I’ll give you the rest of class to find a partner and begin discussing what you wanted to do for this project.”
Finally, she had finished and returned to her desk- probably not going to pay attention to her students for the rest of the class. This left Clyde sitting there, glancing around at the other couple students in the class partner with each other, which seemingly left him alone. Great. All he needed was to stick with this stupid ass project– he was too dumb to do it on his own. What pulled him from his silent pity party was a tap on his shoulder and he looked behind him to see who it had been.
It had been Scott Malkinson. The two kinda hovered this weird line of friends and just people who knew each other. They used to be closer- back when they were younger, but time naturally caused them to drift as interests changed. Clyde was also an asshole when he was in middle school (thinking he was too cool for school, acting up, y’know the normal young teen shenanigans). Since then, Scott had grown to be a couple inches taller than Clyde with the same messy brown hair and freckled face. The other brunette was overall, fairly thin compared to other students who went to the school. Clyde on the other hand was still very average height, grown into his broad shoulder he had always had (he hated them), still remained slightly chubby but strong. Clyde didn’t know why he was comparing himself to Scott and raised his brow at the other, prompting the other to speak.
“I- was wondering if you wanted to be partners..?” Scott asked, kinda hushed and avoided Clyde’s eyes as he stood there next to his desk. Clyde took this moment to study the other, finding himself admiring and then internally reminded himself that he needed to respond.
“Uh- sure.” Clyde spoke, finally and removed his stuff from the desk that was next to his own. Scott smiled, still timid, but took the desk next to Clyde. “Did you have any ideas?”
“Well, to be honest, no. Nothing you would be interested in at least, Clyde.”
“You never know, I might surprise you,” Clyde responded, feeling himself become slightly defensive. Scott must've sensed that and chuckled.
“I’m not saying you're dumb. I just don’t think you would be very interested in what I am.” Scott smiled, more genuine and Clyde felt something in his chest jump and the alarms sounded in his brain. Clyde tilted his head forward, almost trying to get Scott to say whatever he wanted to do the project about. He was trying to get his mind off of whatever his body was doing, or panicking about.
“And that would be..?”
“Well,” Scott paused, glancing at his notebook in front of him before looking back at Clyde, “I like theology and shit like that. Philosophical bullshit. It’s kinda lame, I know.”
Clyde shook his head, unsure what theology was in the first place, “I have no idea what that is, so, I can’t judge on how lame it is.” The brunette paused, trying to come up with something clever, but his brain was still focusing on the other less important things. All he could do was smile, shrugging his shoulders almost helplessly at his partner. Scott smiled back at him, chuckling to himself once more and started like he was going to say something else. Before he could get the words out, the bell rang, interrupting the two.
“Maybe we can hang out after school and figure this out more–?” Scott asked, getting up from where he sat at the desk and watched Clyde pack his shit into his backpack. Clyde thought about it for a couple moments, his chest tightening, but he nodded at Scott.
“Sure, I have practice after school, but we can meet at the bus stop afterwards..?” Clyde suggested, waiting for the other to give the thumbs up.
“Sounds good to me. I’ll just wait for you there.” Scott nodded as the two began their way out of the classroom together.
—-----
In the hall, Clyde walked to his locker and was happy to see Craig at his own locker next to this. As he began to open his locker, he looked over to his friend and gave him a confused look. Craig didn’t say anything at first (rarely he does, unless he is being a smart ass) and cocks a brow, silently asking Clyde what his problem was.
“Dude this is going to sound weird–,”
“Oh boy.”
“Shut up–, this is serious, dude!”
“Okay, get on with it. We only have 5 minutes to discuss this super duper urgent matter of yours, Clyde.”
“How did you know you liked Tweek?” Clyde asked in a more quiet manner, trying to make it harder for anyone who was passing by to hear them. Craig’s stoic demeanor twisted into a confused, slightly curious expression.
“You’ve had plenty of girlfriends to know this, Clyde. You dated Bebe for most of middle school.”
“But– is it different when it is with a boy..?” When Clyde asked his close friend this, he could tell Craig was going ‘what the fuck’ in his head. As much as Craig liked to think he was a stone cold bitch, he wasn’t and at times it was obvious what he was thinking.
“No. Why?”
Clyde palmed his face, “Now I’m confused.”
“Well, um. Are you comfortable talking about it more with me next period break? I can’t get another tardy?” Criag asked, adjusting, at this point a very ancient hat that was on his head and Clyde nodded, kinda wanting to sit and think on the topic.
—
That period seemed to last forever to Clyde, his mind mulling over the sudden and to be utterly honest, kinda shocking feelings he had acquired. If there was a subject he was generally good at, sports related classes. English had no chance at his attention right now- he didn’t even know that the hell the teacher was talking about either. Something about Greek plays and tragedies, or something along those lines. Whenever Clyde would tune back into the lecture, he would be lost and then just continued to think about Scott.
Why Scott out of anyone here? He would expect him to maybe suddenly have gay feelings if it may have been towards someone he hung out with normally. Not Scott, who he barely talked to since they were younger. Now he was a junior in high school and suddenly maybe had a crush– or whatever it was, on Scott. Internally Clyde groaned at himself, Why was he so stupid? His silent pondering/wallowing was rudely interrupted by the bell but he was glad it was over. By the time he was packed up and walking out of the classroom, Craig was there waiting near the door while Tweek stood next to him. As Clyde walked to them, Craig and Tweek must’ve said their piece to each other because the blonde left before Clyde could really get to them. Luckily, Clyde and Craig had the next class together, so they could take their time getting to where they needed to be.
“Do you want to tell me who this lucky guy is?” Criag started the conversation, looking over at Clyde as they began to walk back to their lockers.
“Um, well–” Clyde rubbed the back of his neck, feeling his cheeks become slightly flushed, “You remember Scott, right?”
“The kid with the lisp and diabetes?”
“Yea.”
There was a moment of silence between the two of them and Clyde couldn’t stand it. The brunette clenched his jaw as he waited for his friend to respond. Silence is violence could apply in many situations, like this one where he was waiting for Craig to say something.
“What made you think you have a crush on him, Clyde? Usually they just don’t come out of nowhere– like they can, but genuine feelings don’t.”
“Genuine feelings?” Clyde cocked his brow at Craig as they finally arrived at their lockers, pausing before unlocking his locker.
“Y’know, actually like liking someone. Do you just find him attractive, Clyde?”
Clyde paused, thinking about what Craig had just said. That was a valid thing, that he never really thought about, “Okay, maybe, but just the fact I think a GUY is attractive is different, and confusing me. Like why now, and why is he out of everyone here?”
“Clyde, it’s possible that you’ve always found guys attractive too, but Scott, is just making you finally really notice it.”
Craig had gotten better with his over logic-y ways of explaining things and taking emotions into account, but this time it didn’t seem to really confort Clyde any and the brunette just took the notebooks he needed from the locker and returned the one he didn’t need. After a couple moments of silence, his companion sighed.
“Clyde, just feel it out. I can’t read your mind or anything. We are still young and bound to be curious about one thing or another. And don’t internalize it okay? You’ll just make yourself miserable.”
“Okay-, thanks, Criag. Sorry for bothering you about it.”
“Well, I guess it’s what I signed up for when we became friends,” Criag shrugged as he closed the locker door and turned to Clyde, giving a smile (which happened more often other people would think, Criag was just picky about who he liked), “Let’s get to class.”
The two amigos started down the hall, going to their class.
–
The rest of the day went fairly smoothly for Clyde, despite his new conundrum, he was able to have a decent day. The class with Craig was okay, Math was maybe the second best subject for Clyde so it made it easier for time to pass and just easier to get through in general. After that, it was lunch. Lunch was a time for chaos for the gang, since everyone luckily got lunch with each other. Jimmy was rattling jokes off per usual, testing for a set he must’ve had this weekend. Tolkien was sitting there listening to the conversations, joining in when he wanted to but was overall doing his duty as peacekeeper (he also likes to say he doesn’t like to get involved with their antics, but he finds them funny and joins anyway– usually to make sure no one dies). Craig and Tweek sat side by side, and rarely were they grossed around the group, but they had their moments. They were giving Jimmy feedback on the jokes, as well as Clyde, who dropped his fair share of stupidity.
Clyde was feeling better after lunch, the confusion was dulled out by the fun he had with his friends. It did return after he had to go to his free period, which thankfully was the last period. He sat there, staring at an assignment he was attempting to get done. He just couldn’t focus on it. It was good he talked to Criag, for some reason it felt better to know that he could have found men attractive before- but Scott just stood out somehow. Or even he was just curious.
The hour and a half felt like it took years off Clyde’s life. The relief when it was over– pure bliss. Like everyone else trying to get the hell out of school, he went to his locker and got all his shit. Unfortunately, unlike everyone else, Clyde had to make his way towards the football fieldhouse to change and practice. Yay!!
Other people might hate it, but Clyde enjoyed it. There wasn’t much relaxing per say in football, but Clyde still felt the best when he was on the team playing. Despite having Cartman and company on the team, it tended to be a relatively stress free couple hours for Clyde.
—
Now that football was over and he got a ride home with Stan (who was the quarterback of the team) back home and he was able to shower. He couldn’t imagine trying to hangout with after practice— he fucking stunk. Plus, he wanted to smell somewhat nice if he was going to hang out with someone he found to be attractive. The thought made him anxious again as he stared at himself in the mirror, deciding if the outfit was good enough or not. Eventually, he thought it was good enough and finally headed out the door.